Kenneth A. Camp's Blog, page 17

What Do You Want Your Last Words on Earth to Be?

Even if you’re not a Christian, you probably know some of the Crucifixion story. Jesus, hanging on the cross for several hours, asked for a drink of water. The soldier lifted up a sponge on the end of a stick soaked with sour wine. Jesus took a drink then said, “It is finished!”. He bowed His head and gave up His spirit.

A few things about that statement appeal to me.

Jesus knew why He was on earth. He knew His mission and purpose.
Jesus knew that He accomplished His mission.
Jesus breathed His last breath at the moment He finished His mission.

The apostle Paul talks about being a drink-offering poured out; about running the race in such a way to win. Paul talks to run not without aim or to box as if boxing the air.

Many years ago I read a story about two elderly missionary women. Both were in their 80s serving in somewhere in South America. As they drove down a mountain in the fog, they drove right off the side of that mountain. Not a pleasant way to meet your Creator. However, they finished their life running the race with purpose.

Danielle and I will occasionally comment that we want to die like that. Maybe not by driving off the side of a mountain. But we do want to end this life knowing that we are accomplishing the mission God has given us.

For some reason our culture teaches us that we should retire from our work and do the things we want to do before we die. I am all about enjoying life, having hobbies, even taking vacations. I think God teaches us to do that too.

However, I don’t want to end my life wandering aimlessly along a seashore with my biggest and maybe only aim in life is to find the perfect sand dollar.

Personally, I want to live life with purpose knowing that I am accomplishing the mission God has for me even if it brings death.

I wonder what my last words on Earth will be? Maybe I will throw my arms up into the air and let out a loud shout like sprinters often do when they sprint across the finish line.

Want a Simple Way to Live a Missional Life?

When do you think about taking time out of your busy schedule to invest in another person’s life? Are you one of those super organized people who has it on your calendar each week or month? Maybe it’s when something is said at church or you read something that compels you to do something.

I find that I need a reminder. It’s not natural for me to think of others. Well, I will if it involves me in some direct way. Either the person is already close to me, like a family member or friend, or I derive some benefit from it—it makes me feel better.

Not a very pretty picture of myself, but I know that is who I am.

But when I press into God and spend time with Him, He changes me. He takes my eyes off myself. He gives me a heart of flesh instead a heart of stone. I care about the vulnerable, the hurting, the lonely…I care because that is who He is.

Still I can struggle with living this kind of life—a missional life. My life is too crammed pack with places to be and commitments to fulfill. When I am consumed with my career, parenting, paying bills, taking care of things around the house, my plans…I don’t even notice the people who God notices.

So I end up trying a couple of things:

I add it to my schedule. One day a week I will volunteer at a food pantry. Once a month I will help out with an elderly person. Once a quarter I will spend an afternoon with the kids at the children shelter. Once a year or so I will go on a short-term mission trip.

Nothing wrong with this approach. I certainly have done this. But if it’s not on my calendar, it usually doesn’t happen.

I write a check. Give to missionaries who devote their life to this “kind of work”. Support an orphan in another country, and put their picture on my fridge. Write a check to the benevolence fund at church.

I have written a check for all those too. Please hear me! It is a good thing to help meet needs with our financial resources.

What is a simple way to live a missional life?

This quote convicts me,

We learned that orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they’re not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes.David Platt (Radical)

If I am honest with myself, even by scheduling time to invest in others, and by supporting these causes financially, When I do spend time with them, I quickly return to my life and soon forget about them until my calendar reminds me that it’s time to think about them again.

Could that be because I haven’t taken the time to know even their names?

But what happens when I get to know a foster child? And not just his name, but also the names of his biological family?

What happens when I spend an afternoon sitting on the front porch of a widow learning her story?

What happens when I take the homeless man to lunch and simply listen?

What happens when I spend a weekend helping a refugee family set up a home, or help a family clean up the damage caused by a flood or fire?

What changes when I spend one each week helping a child read, or eat lunch with another whose father is no longer around?

Like David Platt says, once I learn their names, their struggle, their story, every thing changes.

That one simple thing will compel you to live a missional life.

Am I Contributing to My Child’s Trauma?

I know that is a difficult question. What parent, especially an adoptive or foster parent, wants criticism. We all, or most of us, parent the best we can. We are flawed people called to invest in children to help them grow up to be successful adults.

And if we are blessed to have foster or adoptive children, we are also called to help them heal from the past trauma experienced in their lives.

Yet far too often I parent as if I forgot the trauma my son has experienced.

It’s a well-known and documented fact now that all foster and adopted children endure trauma, even children adopted the day of their birth. Sadly, too many of these children suffer years of trauma.

Studies now show that many foster children suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, commonly associated with combat experienced soldiers.

Children in the foster care system endure many traumatic experiences. These experiences may include the trauma that caused their removal from the home, the trauma of separation from their families, and the potential trauma involved with numerous removals and placements in out-of-home care (Racusin, Maerlender, Sengupta, Isquith, & Straus, 2005). As a result of trauma exposure and several other factors, including the severity and repetition of the trauma, proximity to the trauma, and their relationship with the victim (if they are not the victim themselves), children may be at risk for developing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or “PTSD” (American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 2011).



It is not surprising that over 21% of foster care alumni suffer from PTSD, a staggering rate that is higher than that of U.S. war veterans (Pecora et al., 2005).

-both quotes from www.nrcpfc.org

One big difference between a child in a traumatic environment versus a soldier in combat…the child’s environment was meant to be safe; the soldier trained to go into battle. The child’s defenses initially were down while the soldier’s was on high alert. Of course after time, the traumatized child is on high alert as well.

Here are symptoms of PTSD according to U.S. Dept of Veteran Affairs:

Reliving the event (also called re-experiencing symptoms)

Memories of the traumatic event can come back at any time. You may feel the same fear and horror you did when the event took place.

    2.   Avoiding situations that remind you of the event

You may try to avoid situations or people who trigger memories of the traumatic event. You may even avoid talking or thinking about the event.

    3.   Negative changes in beliefs and feelings

The way you think about yourself and others changes because of the trauma.

    4.   Feeling keyed up (also called hyperarousal)

You may be jittery, or always alert and on the lookout for danger. You might suddenly become angry or irritable. This is known as hyperarousal.

(follow the link above to get a more detailed list)

Am I contributing to my child’s trauma?

When I read that list, I see a lot of these behaviors in my son. I am not sure if he has PTSD, but my question is, “Am I contributing to his trauma?”

I am sensitive to my son’s traumatic history, yet I still find myself doing things that create a stressful environment, such as:

Impatience
Yelling
Over-reaction to a lack of response
Punitive correction

Too often I forget the trauma he faced. I expect him to not relive the trauma, respond to triggers, struggle with relationship, or be hyper-aroused.

The more I remember his history, not to coddle or over-compensate, but rather to mindfully offer a safe, understanding environment, the better I can help him heal.

If you are a foster or adoptive parent, please share your thoughts; especially ways you help and not hinder your child’s healing.

Warning: The Mission God Has for You Might Not Make Sense

When someone gives us a mission, most of us want to understand how everything works out. We want the reasons for the mission.

When it is God that is giving us the mission, I think we are afraid that He is going to ask us to sell all of our possessions, leave our friends and family and move to a remote village in Africa to live in a mud hut. He might, but it’s unlikely.

From personal experience, the mission God has for your life might not make sense. I think you can probably count on it not making sense.

The past 10 years of my life has been one surprise after another as I seek God’s mission for my life.

Danielle and I led a team on a 10-day trip to Thailand in February 2007. When we returned home, we both felt God leading us to look into going back as volunteers for up to a year. That meant I had to quit my job that I had for 11 years. We had to decide what to do with our house. We also didn’t know if we had the money to do this. In a nutshell, this didn’t make sense.
We did move to Thailand for six months. If we had not purchased a return ticket, we might still live there! But we did return to the States fully expecting to move back to Thailand within a year. That didn’t happen mainly because of Danielle’s father’s illness and passing. But in 2010 we thought it was time to make the move. Our hearts were still set on mission work in Thailand. We really thought that this was God’s mission for our lives.
But…we sat in a mission conference in February 2010 with a three-week trip to Thailand planned in March. We listened to a presentation from the Aaron Ivey band about adoption and specifically foster care. We walked out of that session with heads spinning. What we heard God telling us made no sense at all. How could we do mission work in Thailand and foster children in Austin, Texas at the same time.
We now still live in the Austin area. We have one adopted son through foster care. And we are still involved with mission work in Thailand, just not by living there. Honestly, it still doesn’t make sense to me.

Honestly, adopting a child from a hard place has been the hardest thing I have done. Sometimes I think that moving and adjusting to life in a foreign country would be easier.

Should my offering to God cost me nothing?

A couple of weeks ago I sat at another foster care and adoption conference listening to a moving main talk by Christie Erwin. She stated that God’s call on our life may not make sense. It may even involve grief or sacrifice.

Wait! If I am obedient to God’s mission for me, you’re telling me that pain and sacrifice might go with it? That just doesn’t sound right.

Then she went on to ask, “Should your offering to God cost you nothing?”

As all good speakers, she paused for several moments for that statement to sink in.

When we embrace God’s mission for us even when it doesn’t make sense, when it causes grief and pain, when we sacrifice comfort, relationships, and sometimes wealth, it shatters legalism and hypocrisy.

Question: Do you hesitate to embrace God’s mission for you when it doesn’t make sense?

You Are Never Too OId to Discover Your Mission in Life

4 Questions to Ask

I laugh when I hear someone who is in their 20s or 30s bemoan missing their opportunity in life. Some seem to think that life is over by the time they reach 40.

If you feel that way either as a young person or someone who is past, God forbid, that 40 year mark, then consider these people and what they accomplished later in life:

Colonel Sanders—62 when he franchised Kentucky Fried Chicken.

Donald and Doris Fisher—Opened the first GAP store when Donald was 40.

Sam Walton—44 when he opened the first Walmart.

Henry Ford—45 when he built the Model T car.

Julia Child—50 when she wrote her first cookbook.

I easily could add many more well-known people to this list, and I know there are thousands of not so-well known people who discovered their mission later in life.

Sometimes our experiences in life, both good and bad, prepare us for that time when we fulfill our mission. However, when we are in the middle of the experience, it’s hard to see how that is preparing us for our mission in life.

I was 45 years old when I quit my job and moved to Thailand, along with Danielle (who also quit her job), to serve as volunteer missionaries.

We became foster parents when I was 49, and as many of you know, we adopted our son, who was two-years-old when, when I was 51.

I really thought we were going overseas as missionaries after we spent six months in Thailand when I was 45, but God seemed to have a different plan. I eventually decided to begin writing. I was 50 years old when I made that decision.

I can look back to my 20s, 30s, and even 40s and see how God prepared me for what I am doing now. In some ways, I am still figuring that out.

That’s one point I want to convey…keep working on discovering your mission in life until the day you die. You will never be too old to have a purpose.

If you think that you are too old or that life’s opportunities have passed you by, Here are 4 Questions to Ask:

What are some of your failures? We don’t like thinking about our mistakes or failures, but they are great teachers. Most of the greatest inventions happened after many failures or even the result of a mistake.
What are some your accomplishments? Think about things you have done no matter how small. What did you learn from them?
Who is God placing in your life now? I believe our mission always involves people. Consider those people in your life today. Your mission could involve them.
What do you still dream about doing? I love being around dreamers. People who see things as they can be not just as they are. If life has stomped that out, take a risk, allow yourself to dream again.

What are some of your answers to these questions?

Who Just Took Over My Child’s Body?

The other day my son and I spent the day together, just the two of us. We began the day going to McDonald’s for breakfast, then to the grocery store to get a few items for the weekend. Then we headed back home to do some work outside which included me cutting down a dead tree.

We enjoyed hanging out together, father and son.

Then it happened. Right before my eyes. One moment he is acting like a normal five-year-old boy enjoying running around doing what little boys like to do. The next moment he is whining and yelling at me making no logical sense at all. I stood there watching my son seriously wondering who had just taken over his body. I was thinking, “Really? Is this the way you’re going to act? You’re about to mess up a really good day!”

Most days when this happens I get pulled into the fray, and I end up asking myself why I am arguing with this little minion. But for some reason this morning God graced me with some insight. I immediately thought about those Snicker commercials like this one:

What was the connection?

Thankfully over the past few years I have learned a few things about brain chemistry from books like The Connected Child: Bring hope and healing to your adoptive family and The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind.

What does a full-out tantrum from a five-year-old, a Snicker bar, and brain chemistry have in common?

What I have learned about brain chemistry is that sometimes the outlandish behavior of my child isn’t an alien takeover but simply a nutritional and/or a hydration issue. His brain slips into survival mode when it needs protein or hydration.

Most of us, when we feel a little run down or even grouchy, we have the thought, “I should eat a snack!” And if we have learned anything about nutrition, we will grab something that will help our blood sugar regulate which in turn will help us act better.

But sometimes we need someone else like in the commercial to help us out!

On this sunny, February day my son needed me to help him out. I needed to help him out!

Mind you I didn’t hand him a Snicker bar even though he would have loved that! But I did get him something a tad bit more healthy to eat and some water. Even though it took some time, he did finally regulate back into an enjoyable little dude without too much anguish on my part.

If you find yourself wondering who took over your child’s body, consider the possibility he just needs a protein snack and possibly some water. It’s a possible easy solution that could save some preventable grief.

Now where did I hide that Snickers bar?

Big Things Happening at Fostering Hope Austin

Fostering Hope Austin equips churches and families to transform the lives of foster and adopted children. —Fostering Hope Austin mission statement.

Fostering Hope Austin, as a collaboration of a few churches in the Austin area, began about 10 years ago serving families and children. Children from foster care or adopted. Families who welcomed them into their home. Churches committed to caring for children without families. Committed to surrounding families with needed support.

In the beginning Fostering Hope Austin didn’t have a name. The group of churches mainly put together an annual conference—A Future and A Hope—and made a few trainings available throughout the year.

Over the past 10 years, these churches saw a need to offer a holistic approach to foster care and adoption. We can easily motivate families to foster and adopt. An annual conference gives some invaluable resources for those considering and others who are in the midst of it. But what about ongoing support.

These kids do come from a hard place, whether adopted on the very day they are born or have spent years in foster or institutional care. Giving them a loving home is not near enough to help them overcome the trauma experienced in their lives.

What too often happens is that families who foster and adopt end up experiencing secondary trauma, isolation, and sadly, for some despair to the point of giving up.

So these churches saw a need to formalize the process by making Fostering Hope Austin a nonprofit organization. This allows for paid staff and funding that enables opportunities throughout the year for families and churches who are committed to a vision of “a community where all children from hard places find loving, healing families.”

Will You Join Us?

(from Fostering Hope Austin brochure)

If God has placed kids from hard places on your heart, or…
If you believe Christian families should engage in the foster care system, or…
If you know a family who has adopted or is fostering and could use support, or…
If God is leading you to develop or grow a foster/adoption ministry in your church…
Email info@fosteringhopeaustin.org to learn how you can engage in this movement!

The 2016 A Future and A Hope conference is coming soon!

February 19 is Professional day. February 20 is Family day. Find out more information by following the link.

Disclaimer: I serve as a board member of Fostering Hope Austin.

How Volunteering Can Help You Discover Your Mission

Experience is one of life’s best teachers. As you seek to discover your mission in life, you can read about different opportunities, you can listen to other’s stories, but nothing beats firsthand experience.

Courtesy of Partners in Hope Lake Travis

 

Since a teenager, I have volunteered locally by serving food at a soup kitchen, stocking shelves at a food pantry, helping elderly widows, working on house repairs for less fortunate, helping build a church in Louisiana, and spending time with kids that lived at a children’s shelter.

Short term mission trips also gave me many opportunities to volunteer. I have helped conduct Vacation Bible Schools and build a church in Mexico, help build a school in Guatemala, handed out Bibles to Chinese Tourists in Thailand and Macau, dug a well in Honduras, hung out with more kids in a children shelter in Thailand, visited men, women and children in prisons in Thailand, prayer walked in Chinese villages, and spent time encouraging missionaries on the field.

When you volunteer for different things, especially things that out of your comfort zone, you begin to learn things about yourself that will help you discover your mission in life. Here are a few things that you will help you as you volunteer:

You will find out what spiritual gifts God has given you. God has given each of us gifts to help us do the work He calls us to do. If you aren’t a believer, I think that gift is dormant within you, waiting to come alive!

You might have the gift of mercy giving you a heart for the vulnerable. Or maybe your gift is teaching, and you discover this as you teach women in Thailand caught in the sex industry. Or your gift might be generosity, and you as you create wealth you enjoy funding mission activities around the world.

When you experience something that matches your gifting, a passion awakens within you. When this happens, you begin dreaming about how you can reorganize your life around this newfound passion. If it truly is a purpose for you to pursue, it will outlast the emotional high.
You learn what you aren’t cut out to do. This may sound like a negative at first, but really it’s a great thing. We know we can’t do everything, so identifying what’s not for us to pursue, we can focus on discovering what is our mission.

Volunteering just once or twice for one or two opportunities probably won’t accomplish much of what I am talking about. If you want to discover your mission in life, I recommend a first step of making volunteerism a priority. Integrate time on at the very least annually to volunteer. I think monthly is better. And, as you probably can guess, I recommend volunteering for different things. Again, not for the sake of volunteering, but so you can discover your mission.

Once you discover your mission in life, it won’t be a matter of finding time to volunteer. I promise, you will adjust your whole way of living around that mission.

How Is Your Lifestyle Affecting Your Mission?

4 Ways to Adapt Your Lifestyle to Your Mission

Does the way you live your life enable or hinder your ability to engage in mission? If you know what your mission is—whether it be orphan care, working with the poor, mentoring young couples—does your lifestyle help you embrace that mission?

We all have resources at our disposal. We have time, money, talents, relationships. Trouble is we tend to use them on our own agenda.

What dictates how you spend your resources? Do you put thought into these things or do you just go with the flow?

Another way to pose the question is, “Do I adapt my lifestyle to my mission or purpose in life?”

Here are a few ways that I think will help us intentionally adapt our lifestyle to our mission. Do understand, I am not an expert on this. Not even close! I find that I have to continually re-calibrate my life to stay on mission.

Know Your Mission or Purpose. I know, easier said than done. However, if you don’t know what your mission or purpose in life is, you surely can’t adapt your lifestyle to it. That’s why so many of us have the approach to life that says something like, “Just make it through life the best you can”. When life throws challenge after challenge your way, that’s exactly what it feels like. But please hear me on this…if you know your purpose in life, you find what you need to overcome those challenges. 
Set Aside Time to Daydream. This might sound strange, but I have heard it said that some of the most successful people in the world are daydreamers. Yet many parents, teachers, bosses try to discipline daydreaming out of a person. They think it is a waste of time. How many times have you heard, “Stop daydreaming and pay attention!”? Granted, if all we did was daydream, we’d never get anything accomplished. But on the other hand, if we are always in task mode, we will miss invaluable insight and creativity.
Begin Your Day with Meditation. As a Christian, I believe that meditation is focused on the Lordship and Majesty of God. Meditation can take the form of meditating on His Word, His creation, His attributes. Whatever form it takes, the end result should be my being reminded of my rightful place in His Universe. It is from Him that I receive wisdom. If I neglect time with Him, well, I fool myself into believing that I understand and know what is best for myself.
Be a Steward of Your Resources. That word, steward, might sound strange to you. The idea of stewardship is  the careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one’s care (Webster). I believe that God entrusted each of us with resources and talents so that we can carry out the purpose we have on this earth. A key to fulfilling that purpose is learning to steward those resources and talents well. You might want to begin by recognizing what has been entrusted to your care.

These simple steps are meant to help you become aware of your mission and the resources you have to fulfill that mission. Once you have a clearer picture, I have found that aligning your lifestyle with your mission begins to happen.

What do you think about daydreaming? Waste of time or beneficial?

Do You Know Why You Were Put on this Planet?

Discover Your Mission. Embrace Your Destiny

I posted a blog last month—Discover and Engage Your Passion. I want to expand on that thought. Passion, in this context, is defined as “a strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing something.”

As I work on refocusing my site, I had landed on that word. However, I decided that doesn’t quite define or capture what kind of content I want to offer.

I have blogged for over two years about mission. A good, general definition here is “a special assignment given to someone.”

Mission still describes what I want to blog about. Yes, mission involves passion as we do get enthusiastic and excited about a mission (at least we should). But I think passion is often thought of as something that comes from within us.

Mission, however, really is an assignment given to us by someone else. Whether you are in the military, work at a corporation, a player on a sports team…most likely you have been given an assignment. Some of you embrace that assignment. Others carry it out only so you don’t lose your job.

Why were you put on this planet?

But what about in the bigger scheme of things. Why were you put on this planet? Did a Creator create you for a specific purpose? Something that not only brings Him glory, but also will bring you pleasure, fulfillment, and joy? Something that you really can be passionate about?

I think the answer is a loud, resounding YES!

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10

I know for some that is uncomfortable to digest. You might not be a Christian. Maybe you’re not sure that even God exists.

I can still help you discover your mission, your passion, your reason for existing.

What you can get by subscribing to my blog…

So the subtitle of this blog—Discover Your Mission. Embrace Your Destiny—is what I have landed on for the tag line for the web site. I am already working on creating content to help you discover you mission, your reason for being alive. The first thing is a free e-book that you can get soon for subscribing to my blog. What does that mean? When you sign up for my blog, not only will you get the free e-book about discovering your mission, but you will also get the blog articles you want delivered to your email. And, throughout the year, you will get access to other free content available only to my email subscribers.

Already know what your mission is?

And if you already have a good idea of your mission, I will help you embrace your destiny found in living out your mission. If we share a similar mission, then many of my blogs and podcasts will specifically relate. However, plenty of the content will still help you embrace your own destiny even if your mission is drastically different from mine.

Bottom line, I hope we link arms as we discover and embrace our mission and destiny.

Will you join me today? Click this link to sign up!