Scott Pixello's Blog, page 10
December 2, 2013
Amazon using drones- surely not?
The big news yesterday was that Big Chief Amazon admitted that they were actively researching the possibility of using drones to deliver packages.
Is this really new? No disrespect to hardworking postal workers everywhere (especially in the weeks before Christmas)but...judging from the vacant-looking moron who keeps leaving my stuff out in the rain or takes it to the wrong house or swears I wasn't at home even when I clearly was, they've been using them for quite a while already.
Is this really new? No disrespect to hardworking postal workers everywhere (especially in the weeks before Christmas)but...judging from the vacant-looking moron who keeps leaving my stuff out in the rain or takes it to the wrong house or swears I wasn't at home even when I clearly was, they've been using them for quite a while already.
December 1, 2013
Goodreads book quiz
I can now understand a little better the wave of shame and self-loathing that washes over serial gamblers who cannot stop placing ‘just one more bet’. My weakness? Goodreads’ infernal never-ending book quiz.
There is one particular fly in my literary ointment: retards, and there is no other word for them, who post dozens, and I mean dozens, of questions on the same book. Great Expectations, Jane Eyre, even Ulysses- these books might merit a few more questions than average perhaps but what do these IDIOTS choose to idolize? Books like John Updike’s Rabbit at Rest. Now, I quite understand the urge to share your reading enthusiasms (that’s one of the main points of Goodreads) but to just post banks and banks of questions on one book has two unfortunate results. Firstly, I am never going to read that book now. I might have before this misguided attempt at evangelical enthusiasm but not now. And secondly, it leads to my use of capitalization- a blight from which this blog has been free up to now. So please, STOP THIS NOW. Take the time that you are wasting, I mean spending, in formulating these endless and pointless questions and use that to GO AND READ SOME OTHER BOOKS.
The thing is, they wear me down these banks of questions like a particularly persistent timeshare salesman until I crack, thinking, for a stupidly phrased 50-50 question, oh I might as well have a go and BINGO- the red bar of shame appears. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
There is one particular fly in my literary ointment: retards, and there is no other word for them, who post dozens, and I mean dozens, of questions on the same book. Great Expectations, Jane Eyre, even Ulysses- these books might merit a few more questions than average perhaps but what do these IDIOTS choose to idolize? Books like John Updike’s Rabbit at Rest. Now, I quite understand the urge to share your reading enthusiasms (that’s one of the main points of Goodreads) but to just post banks and banks of questions on one book has two unfortunate results. Firstly, I am never going to read that book now. I might have before this misguided attempt at evangelical enthusiasm but not now. And secondly, it leads to my use of capitalization- a blight from which this blog has been free up to now. So please, STOP THIS NOW. Take the time that you are wasting, I mean spending, in formulating these endless and pointless questions and use that to GO AND READ SOME OTHER BOOKS.
The thing is, they wear me down these banks of questions like a particularly persistent timeshare salesman until I crack, thinking, for a stupidly phrased 50-50 question, oh I might as well have a go and BINGO- the red bar of shame appears. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
November 30, 2013
J.D. Salinger- respect for the dead or the living?
Three short stories by J.D. Salinger (Birthday, Paula and The Ocean Full of Bowling Balls) have recently appeared (unofficially) online. What is different between this situation and ‘lost’ paintings discovered in a loft somewhere is that Salinger expressly did not want these works to be published. Does an author have the ultimate right to issue such a decree or does he or she owe posterity the greater right to judge the value of such objects for themselves?
These stories were available at university libraries in Texas and Princeton, so you could say that this is a blow against elitism and allows a wider audience to experience what had been available to a select few. In this case, any story (The Ocean…) which is a prequel to Catcher in the Rye (JDS’s only published novel) and featuring Holden Caulfield’s younger brother, would inevitably be of interest to many people.
However, this also raises the question of whether anything once committed to electronic form can ever be truly ‘lost’. Like embarrassing Facebook photos, the electronic trail can prove stubbornly resistant to being erased, even if the ‘author’ wishes this to be so. Ultimately, ownership has been effectively passed from the individual to the facelessness of global technology and whoever exerts (a measure of) control over that.
These stories were available at university libraries in Texas and Princeton, so you could say that this is a blow against elitism and allows a wider audience to experience what had been available to a select few. In this case, any story (The Ocean…) which is a prequel to Catcher in the Rye (JDS’s only published novel) and featuring Holden Caulfield’s younger brother, would inevitably be of interest to many people.
However, this also raises the question of whether anything once committed to electronic form can ever be truly ‘lost’. Like embarrassing Facebook photos, the electronic trail can prove stubbornly resistant to being erased, even if the ‘author’ wishes this to be so. Ultimately, ownership has been effectively passed from the individual to the facelessness of global technology and whoever exerts (a measure of) control over that.
November 29, 2013
Trainspotting- best Scottish book?
So, Trainspotting, Irvine Welsh’s debut novel, has been voted Scotland’s favourite book. Twenty years after its first publication, to my mind, it’s lost little of its punch in its portrayal of drug use both in passages of hilarious exhilaration and revolting, crushing consequences for the group of sad-case central characters. It’s not surprising that Welsh has come back to them- they exert a strange fascination as both comic and tragic figures. Robert Carlisle would love to reprise his role as the psychotic Begbie, if a film sequel actually happens. It could be a fascinating reunion of Carlisle, Jonny Lee Miller and Ewan McGregor, who produced some of their best work in the original film. Might need subtitles again though, mainly for the US but also for my mum who can’t cope with the accent.
November 28, 2013
Leaving a mark upon the world
That Higgs-boson guy (Mr Higgs, not Mr Boson) was a bit lucky to find a hitherto unknown elementary particle that just happened to have the same name as him. What are the chances of that? How cool must it be to give your name to something that everybody uses? Ladislav Biro, Lord Cardigan/Sandwich, the Fosbury Flop- OK, so maybe we don’t use the last one that often but where would ice-skating commentators be without the triple-Salchow?
Places like The Cook Islands, are a bit harder to leave your name on since everywhere’s been discovered but you can still pay spurious web-sites to supposedly have a star named after you.
I’m working on creating a ‘Pixelloverse’ of childish characters, who appear stupid but are actually quite clever. It might be a while before I make it into the dictionary.
P.S. Wasn't Black Friday Robinson Crusoe's sidekick?
Places like The Cook Islands, are a bit harder to leave your name on since everywhere’s been discovered but you can still pay spurious web-sites to supposedly have a star named after you.
I’m working on creating a ‘Pixelloverse’ of childish characters, who appear stupid but are actually quite clever. It might be a while before I make it into the dictionary.
P.S. Wasn't Black Friday Robinson Crusoe's sidekick?
November 27, 2013
Soccer and existentialism
Sweden has failed to qualify for the 2014 soccer World Cup. When asked if he would be watching the tournament on TV, Swedish superstar Zlatan Ibrahimović replied with a clear ‘No’. Such a response is not unusual. Sportsmen and –women often do not want to watch a competition they have been forced to miss through injury or suspension. What’s unusual here is the reason Ibrahimović gave: a tournament ‘without Zlatan’ (weirdly talking about himself in the 3rd person- never a good sign- Serena Williams does this too) is not worth watching. He apparently cannot conceive of a world without him. Psychologically, this is quite a common reaction to a basic existential dilemma but usually as expressed by a very young child. Can you imagine a world without you? Would it be so different?
November 26, 2013
Lost in TV hell
I had a strange out of body experience yesterday. I stumbled across re-runs of Lost and despite myself, I just could not tear myself away. Watching one episode of Lost is fine- you get involved, follow the drama, care a bit about the characters and that’s it. But by the time you watch the second and then the third, you start to think like Piggy in Lord of the Flies who suggests to fellow survivor Ralph that they build a sundial to which Ralph replies sarcastically that they should also construct a submarine and a plane. The basic idea is interesting but then the level of micro-drama per episode becomes ridiculous (also happens with 24 in which characters also experience some hugely dramatic incident- that show begins with a nuclear explosion, remember, something that’s never happened in human history and then this is virtually never referred to again).
There’s a great episode of The IT Crowd (everything The Big Bang Theory wishes it could be) in which IT geek Roy watches a DVD at his boss’ place. His boss instantly spoils the film by trying to guess the twist- ‘It’s really the future…he’s a woman…they’re all aliens…they’re all clones…she’s really a ghost…’ This could be an episode of Lost.
There’s a great episode of The IT Crowd (everything The Big Bang Theory wishes it could be) in which IT geek Roy watches a DVD at his boss’ place. His boss instantly spoils the film by trying to guess the twist- ‘It’s really the future…he’s a woman…they’re all aliens…they’re all clones…she’s really a ghost…’ This could be an episode of Lost.
November 25, 2013
Caligula
One of the joys of immersing yourself in a topic is the little nuggets of trivia it throws up. Been thinking about all things Roman for my upcoming 'Keith Ramsbottom' series based in AD 60.
Did you know the meaning of the name Caligula, as in Roman Emperor, is ‘Little Boot’.
Now just to be clear, electronica/songstress/genius Victoria Hesketh (aka Little Boots) does not spend her time indulging in various acts of unbelievable sexual depravity.
I did ask but she was quite adamant.
Did you know the meaning of the name Caligula, as in Roman Emperor, is ‘Little Boot’.
Now just to be clear, electronica/songstress/genius Victoria Hesketh (aka Little Boots) does not spend her time indulging in various acts of unbelievable sexual depravity.
I did ask but she was quite adamant.
November 24, 2013
Eyes Wide Shut
Snow Patrol have a couple of songs on their album, Eyes Open, which made me think. Not the socially-irresponsible ‘Chasing Cars’ which could lead small children to have accidents but the less showy ‘Open Your Eyes’ and ‘Shut Your Eyes’ (come on guys, make your minds up).
There are a few occasions in life when you have the option to close your eyes or keep them open. Sometimes the choice is conscious (as in facing a firing squad) but often it’s instinctive (kissing and masturbation comes to mind- well, it’s more common than firing squads- OK, maybe not the kissing). I have no evidence to prove the fact but it seems to me that women often choose to close their eyes, falling back on imaginative resources which (stereotypically perhaps) men seem to lack, relying as they do on more visual stimuli.
Then we come to Eyes Wide Shut, Stanley Kubrick’s final completed film, which, IMHO fails as erotic entertainment or intellectual discussion, producing an experience that is simultaneously pretentious and boring. And in which Tom Cruise is perfectly cast. Maybe if you see a weeping angel, you’re not supposed to blink but in this case, I wish I’d kept my eyes shut.
There are a few occasions in life when you have the option to close your eyes or keep them open. Sometimes the choice is conscious (as in facing a firing squad) but often it’s instinctive (kissing and masturbation comes to mind- well, it’s more common than firing squads- OK, maybe not the kissing). I have no evidence to prove the fact but it seems to me that women often choose to close their eyes, falling back on imaginative resources which (stereotypically perhaps) men seem to lack, relying as they do on more visual stimuli.
Then we come to Eyes Wide Shut, Stanley Kubrick’s final completed film, which, IMHO fails as erotic entertainment or intellectual discussion, producing an experience that is simultaneously pretentious and boring. And in which Tom Cruise is perfectly cast. Maybe if you see a weeping angel, you’re not supposed to blink but in this case, I wish I’d kept my eyes shut.
November 23, 2013
What does the fox say?
If you don’t know what this is about, where have you been? Are you living under a rock? Do 240 million YouTube hits mean nothing? OK, so most of them are from me, but that’s not the point.
The unfeasibly-good-looking Norwegian brothers Vegard and Bård Ylvisåker (a billion points in Scrabble- if you allow 8 letters) remind me of Jim Jeffries’ gag about Swedish people (also available on a YouTube-linked device near you). I know Sweden and Norway are different countries but I think his point holds true for both.
As to the original question, I always thought it was a ‘bark’ but probably with the rise in the urban fox population it’s more likely to be ‘Munch, munch’ as it bites the face off a sleeping toddler.
The unfeasibly-good-looking Norwegian brothers Vegard and Bård Ylvisåker (a billion points in Scrabble- if you allow 8 letters) remind me of Jim Jeffries’ gag about Swedish people (also available on a YouTube-linked device near you). I know Sweden and Norway are different countries but I think his point holds true for both.
As to the original question, I always thought it was a ‘bark’ but probably with the rise in the urban fox population it’s more likely to be ‘Munch, munch’ as it bites the face off a sleeping toddler.
