Nick Vulich's Blog, page 3
October 30, 2014
Set Up Your Mail List With Mail Chimp
I've been a little slow getting started with this mail list thing, and I could kick myself for it now. Every piece of advice I've ever read about being an indie author says you need a mailing list. Today, I'm over two years into the game, have sold close to twenty-thousand books, and given away twice that many. Think of all the fans I turned away.
To be honest, I tried to set up a mail list several times, and decided it was just too hard. I didn't understand how to do it, so I kept putting it off. I could always justify it. Sales were good. People were buying my books, sometimes by the boatload. Why would I ever need a list?
Well, over the last two weeks I discovered one reason I need a list - what goes up, also goes down. My sales have been disheartening, not terrible - but definitely trending downward. I've run a number of Kindle Countdown Deals, and done some free giveaways, but they haven't been as effective as usual. I suspect part of that is the time of the year. October is horrible for retail sales, and books are the same. They normally pick up by the first or second week of November.
The thing is, if I had heeded the advice to build a list, I could have done some targeted marketing to level out my sales.
That's the problem.
Here's the solution.
I set up a list management account with Mail Chimp, and added links to all of my books, and to both of my blogs. My goal for the next year is to move from zero to a minimum of twenty-five hundred subscribers for my mail list. To do that, I'm going to concentrate on doing more free giveaways instead of using Countdown Deals to drive sales. I'm also thinking about offering several of my books as perma free to give readers a free entry point into my works.
............................
Here's a quick tutorial on how to create a mail list sign up form using Mail Chimp.
To create your mail list from the Mail Chimp dashboard, select Create-a-list and follow the prompts.
After you have your list set up it's time to create your sign up form. Mail Chimp makes it easy to design a fancy form to entice readers to sign up, or you can go with something Plain Jane. The choice is entirely up to you.
I created the list header above in about five minutes using Microsoft Paint. I shrunk the book covers down to 175 x 116 pixels, and tiled them across a rectangle sized 700 x 600 pixels. I used the line tool to draw the lines above and below the books and typed my text into the space below the covers. Alternatively, you could pay someone on Fiverr and let them design something really fancy.
Here's a screen shot of the actual signup form. It's easy to customize, too. You can easily add or delete fields for the information you want to collect. Remember, you want to make it as easy as possible for readers to sign up. The more information you ask for, the more people are going to decide it's not worth it. My advice is to ask for the email address and first name. It's the path of least resistance.
If you look where it says Grouping 11725, you can see the different categories. By doing this readers can choose what they want to be notified about. Readers interested in only my ecommerce or history books can choose just those categories. When I send out offers about my self-publishing books or political humor works they won't be bothered.
You could create several different lists or signup forms, but this makes it easier to manage your lists.
There are also several options available to embed forms on your blog or website, integrate with a Word Press blog, or create a form to use on Facebook.
To include a link in your book, add the signup form URL to the front or back matter of your book. here's how I do it.
If you don't do anymore than this, you should be able to build a good sized mail list over time just from reader signups.
Another option is to include the signup form on your blog. Select the Embedded Forms option from the Mail Chimp menu. Choose the fields you want to include on your sign-up form, and copy the embed code. Paste the code where you want to embed the signup form on your blog. That's all there is to it. If you have a Word Press blog use the Integrated Forms option to include a signup form on your blog.
There are also options to add signup forms for you Facebook page or for tablets. I haven't experimented with them yet so we'll have to save them for another post.
To be honest, I tried to set up a mail list several times, and decided it was just too hard. I didn't understand how to do it, so I kept putting it off. I could always justify it. Sales were good. People were buying my books, sometimes by the boatload. Why would I ever need a list?
Well, over the last two weeks I discovered one reason I need a list - what goes up, also goes down. My sales have been disheartening, not terrible - but definitely trending downward. I've run a number of Kindle Countdown Deals, and done some free giveaways, but they haven't been as effective as usual. I suspect part of that is the time of the year. October is horrible for retail sales, and books are the same. They normally pick up by the first or second week of November.
The thing is, if I had heeded the advice to build a list, I could have done some targeted marketing to level out my sales.
That's the problem.
Here's the solution.
I set up a list management account with Mail Chimp, and added links to all of my books, and to both of my blogs. My goal for the next year is to move from zero to a minimum of twenty-five hundred subscribers for my mail list. To do that, I'm going to concentrate on doing more free giveaways instead of using Countdown Deals to drive sales. I'm also thinking about offering several of my books as perma free to give readers a free entry point into my works.
............................
Here's a quick tutorial on how to create a mail list sign up form using Mail Chimp.
To create your mail list from the Mail Chimp dashboard, select Create-a-list and follow the prompts.
After you have your list set up it's time to create your sign up form. Mail Chimp makes it easy to design a fancy form to entice readers to sign up, or you can go with something Plain Jane. The choice is entirely up to you.
I created the list header above in about five minutes using Microsoft Paint. I shrunk the book covers down to 175 x 116 pixels, and tiled them across a rectangle sized 700 x 600 pixels. I used the line tool to draw the lines above and below the books and typed my text into the space below the covers. Alternatively, you could pay someone on Fiverr and let them design something really fancy.
Here's a screen shot of the actual signup form. It's easy to customize, too. You can easily add or delete fields for the information you want to collect. Remember, you want to make it as easy as possible for readers to sign up. The more information you ask for, the more people are going to decide it's not worth it. My advice is to ask for the email address and first name. It's the path of least resistance.
If you look where it says Grouping 11725, you can see the different categories. By doing this readers can choose what they want to be notified about. Readers interested in only my ecommerce or history books can choose just those categories. When I send out offers about my self-publishing books or political humor works they won't be bothered.
You could create several different lists or signup forms, but this makes it easier to manage your lists.
There are also several options available to embed forms on your blog or website, integrate with a Word Press blog, or create a form to use on Facebook.
To include a link in your book, add the signup form URL to the front or back matter of your book. here's how I do it.
Want to know about Nick’s new book releases? Join our mailing list.
Interested in being notified when Nick releases his next book? Click here to join our mailing list. We promise not to send any spam, or unwanted emails. The only thing you will receive is news about Nick’s new book releases, and occasional specials we are offering.
If you don't do anymore than this, you should be able to build a good sized mail list over time just from reader signups.
Another option is to include the signup form on your blog. Select the Embedded Forms option from the Mail Chimp menu. Choose the fields you want to include on your sign-up form, and copy the embed code. Paste the code where you want to embed the signup form on your blog. That's all there is to it. If you have a Word Press blog use the Integrated Forms option to include a signup form on your blog.
There are also options to add signup forms for you Facebook page or for tablets. I haven't experimented with them yet so we'll have to save them for another post.
October 29, 2014
Book Review: 33 Success Habits by Steve Scott and Rebecca Livermore
Another home run for Steve Scott.
The Daily Entrepreneur gives readers 33 specific steps to become more successful The book is broken down into five sections.
1. Failing to achieve professional goals
2. Not getting things done
3. Increasing competition
4. Poor business relationships
5. Stress and burnout
Numbers three and four hit my current weak points, so that's what I intend to concentrate on now. You can do the same thing. Read the entire book, pick one or two sections where you need the most help, and work on those.
To give you an idea of the practical advice you're going to learn, I'm going to focus on section 3 - Increasing competition. Here are the subtopics the book touches on -
1. Maximize dead time
When you're busy or under attack, it's often hard to find time to do things. But, if you look at it carefully - most of us have slow periods in our schedule where we can attack new projects or learn things.
2. Read 30 minutes a day
Reading is one of the best ways to learn new things, and keep up with developments in your field. It can be as simple as reading magazines, newspapers, books in or out of your field, or even listening to audio books. if you don't set aside time to read, you're not going to be able to keep up with what's happening in your business field.
3. Develop new skills
Take time out to learn new things. If you're an author, learn HTML programming or how to format your books. Take a community college or graduate class about something you've always been interested in. You never know what information can be helpful, or how you'll be able to use it. I recently took two graduate history classes, and they paid off in a way I never expected. They helped me develop topics for several new books I will be writing soon.
4. Capture ideas
It's great to learn new things, but to make sure you can act on them, you need to find a way to save them. Write them down. Record them. Do whatever it takes to save and manage ideas.
Overall, the book has lots of great advice that you can easily implement to be more successful.
You won't be disappointed.
The Daily Entrepreneur gives readers 33 specific steps to become more successful The book is broken down into five sections.
1. Failing to achieve professional goals
2. Not getting things done
3. Increasing competition
4. Poor business relationships
5. Stress and burnout
Numbers three and four hit my current weak points, so that's what I intend to concentrate on now. You can do the same thing. Read the entire book, pick one or two sections where you need the most help, and work on those.
To give you an idea of the practical advice you're going to learn, I'm going to focus on section 3 - Increasing competition. Here are the subtopics the book touches on -
1. Maximize dead time
When you're busy or under attack, it's often hard to find time to do things. But, if you look at it carefully - most of us have slow periods in our schedule where we can attack new projects or learn things.
2. Read 30 minutes a day
Reading is one of the best ways to learn new things, and keep up with developments in your field. It can be as simple as reading magazines, newspapers, books in or out of your field, or even listening to audio books. if you don't set aside time to read, you're not going to be able to keep up with what's happening in your business field.
3. Develop new skills
Take time out to learn new things. If you're an author, learn HTML programming or how to format your books. Take a community college or graduate class about something you've always been interested in. You never know what information can be helpful, or how you'll be able to use it. I recently took two graduate history classes, and they paid off in a way I never expected. They helped me develop topics for several new books I will be writing soon.
4. Capture ideas
It's great to learn new things, but to make sure you can act on them, you need to find a way to save them. Write them down. Record them. Do whatever it takes to save and manage ideas.
Overall, the book has lots of great advice that you can easily implement to be more successful.
You won't be disappointed.
Book Review: Shoot Your Novel: Cinematic Techniques to Supercharge Your Writing
I gotta admit, I really liked this book. It took about two hours to read, but the payoff should be huge.
Here's the main takeaway for writers: approach your writing like a cinematographer. Plan every scene in your book and choose a camera angle (perspective) to tell your story from.
The author explains a number of different camera shots directors use, then goes on to explain how and when to use them. She also provides numerous examples of the the camera angles as used in books and movies.
The idea behind the book makes sense. If writers want to be successful, they should study Hollywood blockbusters. Good movies don't just happen. They're planned. they're edited to show exactly what the director wants viewers to see.
I don't want to give away the farm, so I'm only going to discuss a few camera shots.
One of these is the establishing shot. It occurs at the beginning of the movie, and when you are switching scenes. It establish the locale, or gives viewers (readers) a frame of reference for the new scene. The establishing scene can be very brief, or it can take several minutes. It is important because it gives readers a context for what is going to happen. If you leave the establishing scene out, you risk confusing your readers.
Another important scene is the close-up. In the authors words...
If you want to do just one thing to help draw readers into your story, focus on adding several sensory loaded close-up scenes. If you're not sure how to do it, download some erotica stories. These authors understand the art of close-up, and how to involve your senses.
The final chapters help tie everything altogether, showing how to use the different camera angles in your writing.
If you want to bring your books to life - buy this book. Highlight it. read it often. Practice telling your story using different camera angles.
Well worth the investment.
Here's the main takeaway for writers: approach your writing like a cinematographer. Plan every scene in your book and choose a camera angle (perspective) to tell your story from.
The author explains a number of different camera shots directors use, then goes on to explain how and when to use them. She also provides numerous examples of the the camera angles as used in books and movies.
By knowing the key moment and how your plot builds it, you can plan the camera angles to best enhance the visual experience and evoke the strongest emotional reaction from your reader.
The idea behind the book makes sense. If writers want to be successful, they should study Hollywood blockbusters. Good movies don't just happen. They're planned. they're edited to show exactly what the director wants viewers to see.
I don't want to give away the farm, so I'm only going to discuss a few camera shots.
One of these is the establishing shot. It occurs at the beginning of the movie, and when you are switching scenes. It establish the locale, or gives viewers (readers) a frame of reference for the new scene. The establishing scene can be very brief, or it can take several minutes. It is important because it gives readers a context for what is going to happen. If you leave the establishing scene out, you risk confusing your readers.
Another important scene is the close-up. In the authors words...
...small close-up details can help make the scene come alive. Sensory details (touch, taste, sounds, sights, smells) are the most effective ways to make a scene come alive in the reader's mind.
If you want to do just one thing to help draw readers into your story, focus on adding several sensory loaded close-up scenes. If you're not sure how to do it, download some erotica stories. These authors understand the art of close-up, and how to involve your senses.
The final chapters help tie everything altogether, showing how to use the different camera angles in your writing.
If you want to bring your books to life - buy this book. Highlight it. read it often. Practice telling your story using different camera angles.
Well worth the investment.
August 19, 2014
Kindle Unlimited - Has it Shaken Up Your Book Sales?
About a month ago I posted a short article about how I pulled all of my eBooks off of Smashwords, Nook, iBooks, and Kobo so I could jump back into KDP. When I first heard about Kindle Unlimited I knew I had to be in.
Last month was gooooood!
I picked up over a hundred borrows in nine days. Before that I was at nine for the month. This month I'm at 160 borrows with twelve days to go. With a little luck I may hit 300 borrows. Take that times the $1.81 Amazon paid out for borrows last month and that works out to almost $550. I'm figuring roughly 400 sales at about $2.00 each, which brings my total Kindle take to something like $1350 for August. Last month I received $850 in Kindle royalties. That's another $500 in my pocket thanks to Kindle Unlimited.
Not too shabby.
What was your experience with Kindle Unlimited? Did it totally change your ratio of sales to borrows? Did it boost your royalties? or drive them into the dirt?
Let me know....
Updating this one 10/29/2014
Three months into Kindle Unlimited it's changing the face of Kindle sales.
I don't know about other authors but borrows currently make up 40 to 45 percent of my monthly sales. The way it's going that number could easily exceed 60 percent by this time next year.
My thought is, that's good, and bad. Payouts for Kindle borrows have fallen from approximately $2.11 each before Kindle Unlimited to $1.51 this last month. That's a decrease of about 60 cents per book. At the same time, the extra surge in sales during the first month or two of Kindle Unlimited has fallen off. the result, Kindle earnings are down.
Again, that's my experience. Maybe your's is difference. Take a few moments to let readers know how Kindle Unlimited is working for you.
Last month was gooooood!
I picked up over a hundred borrows in nine days. Before that I was at nine for the month. This month I'm at 160 borrows with twelve days to go. With a little luck I may hit 300 borrows. Take that times the $1.81 Amazon paid out for borrows last month and that works out to almost $550. I'm figuring roughly 400 sales at about $2.00 each, which brings my total Kindle take to something like $1350 for August. Last month I received $850 in Kindle royalties. That's another $500 in my pocket thanks to Kindle Unlimited.
Not too shabby.
What was your experience with Kindle Unlimited? Did it totally change your ratio of sales to borrows? Did it boost your royalties? or drive them into the dirt?
Let me know....
Updating this one 10/29/2014
Three months into Kindle Unlimited it's changing the face of Kindle sales.
I don't know about other authors but borrows currently make up 40 to 45 percent of my monthly sales. The way it's going that number could easily exceed 60 percent by this time next year.
My thought is, that's good, and bad. Payouts for Kindle borrows have fallen from approximately $2.11 each before Kindle Unlimited to $1.51 this last month. That's a decrease of about 60 cents per book. At the same time, the extra surge in sales during the first month or two of Kindle Unlimited has fallen off. the result, Kindle earnings are down.
Again, that's my experience. Maybe your's is difference. Take a few moments to let readers know how Kindle Unlimited is working for you.
Review:Democrats Are So Dumb
Just finished reading this short Kindle read - Democrats Are So Dumb.It's got two one star reviews so you know I'm not talking Faulkner or Hemingway here. The best I can say is it's short, smirky, and pokes fun at Obama, Hillary, and other dumb ass politicians.
Not sure whether to recommend it or not. I had a few good laughs. It's free if you're subscribed to Kindle unlimited, and if you dislike Democrats - that's probably a plus.
Here's a short excerpt the author let me post.
There could even be a sitcom in their future—“The President Next Door” or “From First Family to First in the Welfare Line.” It could be a snarky look at a president who lost his charisma and his cash, and landed in the Harlem housing projects (aka The PJs). Maybe Obama could muster his management experience and become the building super in exchange for a few bucks off the rent.Along the way he makes some wacky friends, shoots the shit with former KGB agents on the lam in the big city, and contemplates a little welfare fraud…maybe even a heist of government cheese.Who knows, along the way he could bump heads with Osama Bin Laden, who escaped death and is running a Middle Eastern Deli in New York City. Not too far away, Saddam Hussein heads up a gang of street toughs who are challenging Obama’s block for neighborhood domination. And, further down the street in a Jewish nursing home the hundred plus year old Adolph Hitler is getting his diaper changed for the sixth time that morning. Elvis is giving music lessons in his basement flat; Jimmy Hendrix is a struggling church band director; Marilyn with her looks long gone is hit on by the only New Yorker willing to give her a look—William Jefferson Clinton.
Meanwhile, Barack Obama gazes into the clouds repeating, “Change—we can believe in…”
August 18, 2014
Video Trailer for Audio Book 7 Steps to a New Job
My thanks to Shawn Schroeder for creating the following promotional video for my audio book 7 Steps to a New Job. If your books or audio books are moving a little slow check it out. You may want to try something similar to pickup your sales.
July 19, 2014
Have You Tried Kindle Unlimited
If you haven't heard about it yet, Amazon shook the Kindle world up a bit yesterday when they started offering a new program Kindle Unlimited. For a $9.99 monthly subscription fee Kindle owners can read all of the books they want for free (as long as they're in the lending library).
Right now Amazon is offering the first month free, so I had to give it a try. By the end of day one I bumped into one of the program rules - You're limited to borrowing ten books at one time. After that if you want to pick up a new book, you have to give one back. Fair enough, I guess. From what I understand there are no limits on how long you can borrow a book. And the fact that you can only have ten titles on your Kindle at one time is a good thing for writers, because it means if readers want to keep a permanent copy of your book, they still need to buy it.
From what I understand the program works just like KDP. When a reader selects one of your books you share in the split of KDP funds for that month as long as the reader reads ten percent of your book. To compensate for the increased borrow volume Amazon added $800,000 to the fund for this month.
It sounds like a great deal for authors. There's no price barrier to try your book if readers are enrolled in Kindle Unlimited. All they need to do is click on the Read for Free button, and your book is sent to their Kindle.
For someone like me who's been moving my books off of Amazon to Smashwords, iBooks, Barnes and Noble, and GooglePlay, this presented quite a dilemma. Sales were just picking up on the other sites, not fantastic, but I was looking at an extra hundred bucks a month from each site. However, after reading about Kindle Unlimited, and considering its sales potential i decided to move all of my books back to KDP.
If you decide to try it, cancel your books on all of the other sites first, and then re-enroll your books in KDP. This way there's no conflict with your books being posted on other sites. Barnes and Noble removed my books in less than two hours. The rest of the book sites took from eight to twelve hours so I was still able to have my books available on Kindle Unlimited from day one.
Here's hoping it works out as planned.
Right now Amazon is offering the first month free, so I had to give it a try. By the end of day one I bumped into one of the program rules - You're limited to borrowing ten books at one time. After that if you want to pick up a new book, you have to give one back. Fair enough, I guess. From what I understand there are no limits on how long you can borrow a book. And the fact that you can only have ten titles on your Kindle at one time is a good thing for writers, because it means if readers want to keep a permanent copy of your book, they still need to buy it.
From what I understand the program works just like KDP. When a reader selects one of your books you share in the split of KDP funds for that month as long as the reader reads ten percent of your book. To compensate for the increased borrow volume Amazon added $800,000 to the fund for this month.
It sounds like a great deal for authors. There's no price barrier to try your book if readers are enrolled in Kindle Unlimited. All they need to do is click on the Read for Free button, and your book is sent to their Kindle.
For someone like me who's been moving my books off of Amazon to Smashwords, iBooks, Barnes and Noble, and GooglePlay, this presented quite a dilemma. Sales were just picking up on the other sites, not fantastic, but I was looking at an extra hundred bucks a month from each site. However, after reading about Kindle Unlimited, and considering its sales potential i decided to move all of my books back to KDP.
If you decide to try it, cancel your books on all of the other sites first, and then re-enroll your books in KDP. This way there's no conflict with your books being posted on other sites. Barnes and Noble removed my books in less than two hours. The rest of the book sites took from eight to twelve hours so I was still able to have my books available on Kindle Unlimited from day one.
Here's hoping it works out as planned.
Book Review: Tom Robbins: The Kindle Singles Interview
I just finished reading the Kindle Single Interview with Tom Robbins. It's a lot like catching up with an old friend. I started reading Robbin's books over thirty years ago when I picked up a copy of Even Cowgirls Get the Blues.
It was new. It was exciting. It was the seventies. And here was this guy with a crazy writing style all of his own. It was like rediscovering Hunter Thompson, but this time he was writing fiction.
The interview was conducted by Mara Altman, and she does a great job keeping up with Robbins. We learn a lot of things about Robbins, for example his passion for mayonnaise; his fondness for champagne, for Paris, and especially for the bubbles in carbonated beverages as they crash against his tongue, lips, and gums.
We also learn a lot about Tom Robbins the Writer. He's old fashioned, choosing to write with pencil and paper, rather than those new-fangled word processors. And, the way he writes would drive all of the writing advice coaches nuts. A good day for Robbins is to churn out one page, or maybe even one paragraph.
Listen to how he does it...
On planning and outlining...
On the business of writing...
Of course there's plenty more advice on writing, on LSD, on religion, and on living to be eighty-one.
I don't want to spoil it for anyone. Let's just say for 99 cents its a great MFA course for aspiring novelists, or just a way to catch up with an old friend.
The book is Tom Robbins: The Kindle Singles Interview by Mara Altman.
It was new. It was exciting. It was the seventies. And here was this guy with a crazy writing style all of his own. It was like rediscovering Hunter Thompson, but this time he was writing fiction.
The interview was conducted by Mara Altman, and she does a great job keeping up with Robbins. We learn a lot of things about Robbins, for example his passion for mayonnaise; his fondness for champagne, for Paris, and especially for the bubbles in carbonated beverages as they crash against his tongue, lips, and gums.
We also learn a lot about Tom Robbins the Writer. He's old fashioned, choosing to write with pencil and paper, rather than those new-fangled word processors. And, the way he writes would drive all of the writing advice coaches nuts. A good day for Robbins is to churn out one page, or maybe even one paragraph.
Listen to how he does it...
"I try never to leave a sentence until I think it's as good as I can make it. Then when I'm satisfied with that sentence, I go onto the next one."
On planning and outlining...
"Sometimes I start with a title, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues. I started with the title. I wrote the title and I turned the page over and I wrote the first sentence and I just went on from there."
On the business of writing...
"A novelist is in the same business that God is in. You're creating a world, universes, the people in them. I think that language is not the frosting it's the cake."
Of course there's plenty more advice on writing, on LSD, on religion, and on living to be eighty-one.
I don't want to spoil it for anyone. Let's just say for 99 cents its a great MFA course for aspiring novelists, or just a way to catch up with an old friend.
The book is Tom Robbins: The Kindle Singles Interview by Mara Altman.
July 15, 2014
Free Book - Life Without the BS
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Just published my new book, Life Without the BS. You can pick up a free copy on Amazon Kindle from July 15th - 19th. If you have a few moments, be sure to stop back to Amazon when you're finished reading it. It'll help me create a better book next time around, and it'll help readers decide if it's a good fit for them.
Life Without the BS is a humorous look at life, marriage, kids, education, and a few other bugaboos including politics, religion, and sex and dating.
If you've got an axe to grind against the Obama, Hillary, Rush, or Anne Coulter--we've got you covered there, too.
I don't want to give away the farm, but here a few tastes of what you'll find inside.
Let me warn--It's finger licking good. Once you start reading you won't want to stop.
On people -
As Americans, we're guaranteed the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Only problem is what gets my rocks off doesn't even register on the happiness scale for some crazy ass bastards out there. Believe it or not, people are different, some a little more so than others.
On sex and dating -
Everything I know about sex and dating I learned from perusing the Craigslist ads.
Don't get me wrong, I used to have a pretty good idea of how to handle myself around the opposite sex, but after twenty years of marriage, I figured I better polish up my dating skills before putting myself back on the market.
Apparently the new ritual is for the guy to post a picture of his thingy on Craigslist, along with a catchy slogan like, "I've got a really big package for you," or "Cum take a ride on my rocket."
If everything measures up, the female will email back a picture of her "boom box" or "tater tots."
Last time I was in the dating game it took a minimum of three dates to get that far.
But, as they say, everything moves faster in the internet age.
On education -
I think the biggest flaw in our educational system is we keep turning out class after class of graduates who aren't trained to perform the most in demand jobs.
Think about it, we teach kids how to read, write, conjugate verbs, and perform long division, but we don't teach them how to run a cash register, sweep the parking lot, or roundup shopping carts.
Perhaps the most important phrase any high school or college graduate can learn is, "Would you like fries with that?"
On kids -
I'm not saying God should be singled out for negligence, but who releases new products without warning labels, disclosures, product FAQs, and such? Am I the only one who thinks every new baby should come with a handbook on proper care and handling? A troubleshooting CD wouldn't hurt, either.
And, how about a warning sticker stamped across their ass? That's not chocolate frosting shooting out of there!
Ready for more...Order your copy today.
Life Without the BS is a humorous look at life, marriage, kids, education, and a few other bugaboos including politics, religion, and sex and dating.
If you've got an axe to grind against the Obama, Hillary, Rush, or Anne Coulter--we've got you covered there, too.
I don't want to give away the farm, but here a few tastes of what you'll find inside.
Let me warn--It's finger licking good. Once you start reading you won't want to stop.
On people -
As Americans, we're guaranteed the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Only problem is what gets my rocks off doesn't even register on the happiness scale for some crazy ass bastards out there. Believe it or not, people are different, some a little more so than others.
On sex and dating -
Everything I know about sex and dating I learned from perusing the Craigslist ads.
Don't get me wrong, I used to have a pretty good idea of how to handle myself around the opposite sex, but after twenty years of marriage, I figured I better polish up my dating skills before putting myself back on the market.
Apparently the new ritual is for the guy to post a picture of his thingy on Craigslist, along with a catchy slogan like, "I've got a really big package for you," or "Cum take a ride on my rocket."
If everything measures up, the female will email back a picture of her "boom box" or "tater tots."
Last time I was in the dating game it took a minimum of three dates to get that far.
But, as they say, everything moves faster in the internet age.
On education -
I think the biggest flaw in our educational system is we keep turning out class after class of graduates who aren't trained to perform the most in demand jobs.
Think about it, we teach kids how to read, write, conjugate verbs, and perform long division, but we don't teach them how to run a cash register, sweep the parking lot, or roundup shopping carts.
Perhaps the most important phrase any high school or college graduate can learn is, "Would you like fries with that?"
On kids -
I'm not saying God should be singled out for negligence, but who releases new products without warning labels, disclosures, product FAQs, and such? Am I the only one who thinks every new baby should come with a handbook on proper care and handling? A troubleshooting CD wouldn't hurt, either.
And, how about a warning sticker stamped across their ass? That's not chocolate frosting shooting out of there!
Ready for more...Order your copy today.
July 8, 2014
Your Book at 99 Cents - Should You Pull the Trigger?
I hate selling my books for 99 cents. I don't know if it's the thought that I'm not making any money, or the feeling that it's cheating - selling it for less than I think it's worth.Ten days ago I decided to give my bestselling book, eBay 2014 a whirl at 99 cents.
It took it two or three days to catch on, but since the beginning of July it's held the number one spot pretty steadily. Steve Weber's Bar Code Booty knocked me out for several hours, and another time Marsha Collier's eBay for Dummies took my spot for a good twelve hours. Other than that the book's been hanging in there at number one in the eBay category, and oftentimes in two of the e-commerce categories as well.
I know, you're probably asking-what's the point if you're not making any money?
I keep asking my self that same question, as I debate pulling the trigger and raising the price back up.
Here's the deal. Last month I sold 150 copies of eBay 2014. In the first eight days of this month I've already moved 105 copies. That's a lot of extra readers, and more readers is a good thing, right?
Having the book priced at 99 cents has also helped in a couple of other areas: Sales of most of my other books have increased, and visitors to my blog have nearly doubled in that time.
So no matter how much I want to pull the plug on 99 cents, I just can't bring myself to do it. Right now the book is ranking between 9500 and 14000. I've decided I won't make a price change until it jumps above 15000. That way it's the readers that are making the decision, not me.
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I do know when that one goes back to regular price, I'm going to drop the price of another book and see if I can repeat the process.
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Is anyone else having any luck using the 99 cent price point to jump start their books sales?
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