Shea Zellweger's Blog, page 4

Five Next Level Life Hacks

1) Having trouble eating soup? You might be tempted to try using a spoon instead of a fork, but here's a better idea: Don't eat soup. Soup is what happens when a delicious meal accidentally falls in a pot of boiling water. Instead of ruining perfectly good food, you can eat the meal sans water. Still want that authentic soup experience? Try licking a lit match to burn a few taste buds.


2) Difficulty keeping your assorted knick-knacks organized? First-level life hackers would probably tell you...

Types of Intelligence, Explained

Did you know there are nine different types of intelligence? No, really. This guy says there are. But what are the people who have these types of intelligence like? Let me describe each one to you. You may wish to click the link for reference.

1) Naturalist Intelligence. People with a high NQ can tell differences between things. For instance, if you show such a person a frog, a pony, and a carburetor, that person will be able to tell you only two of those things are edible.

2) Musical Intellige...

Prequel Trilogies Are Bad, M'Kay?

Recently, I posted something disparaging about the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy on Facebook. This is nothing new for me, but this time, someone challenged me by asking if I would be alright with people throwing out the "Old Testament" because they didn't like it. I thought about this for a moment, and decided if the Hebrew Scriptures had been written as a prequel to the Greek Scriptures 20-30 years after the original release of the Greek Scriptures, I absolutely would be alright with throwing th...

Questions for Presidential Candidates

The first Republican Presidential debate is a scant 2 weeks away. If you're like me, that means you're desperate to find out what questions will be asked of the ~87 candidates on stage. Well, lucky for you I've obtained an advance copy of the question list.

1) Do you think requiring Iran to change their name to Iwalked would slow down their nuclear efforts?

2) Mr. Trump: if elected, will you promise to wear that godawful hat at all times, rather than subjecting the American people to the horror...

Found Poetry

Found on the corner of 21st and Broadway: A Poem. It's about 21 lines high, with 3 stanzas, possibly made of ink and parchment, I'm not really sure.Looks like it's a pure bred Arabian, but could be a mix; I'm not an expert.
 I rescued it from a suspicious looking guy in a beret who smelled like he'd been lacing his clove cigarettes with something he imported from Colorado. Answers to "Barry," could be its name. If you own Barry, please come get him. He's attracting hipsters.

Best Jobs For Pants Haters

The lists of best jobs seem like an explosive growth market. What began as a simple way of communicating what positions were currently being filled in a given industry became an industry in its own right, to the point that no list of best jobs for writers is complete without job list writer being included. Of course, this has led to a market over-saturation in which increasingly desperate writers maintain job security by enumerating such rankings as "The Five Best Jobs for Eldest Ch...

How To Interact Successfully with Agents and Publishers

Previously in this series: How To Successfully Query Your Manuscript

So you've received something from an agent or publisher which was not an outright rejection. Well done, you! You no doubt followed my previous instructions to get you this far, and are eager to know the secrets to getting through this next round of the process. In fact, considering the previous instructions were given three whole weeks ago, you've probably been in a state of frozen panic for the past twenty days, wanting to k...

The Curmudgeon's Guide to Sports Scheduling

I love sports. All of the sports. And I don't just mean Basketball, Football (okay, not football, I swore that off last year and ain't goin' back), Baseball, Hockey, and Soccer. I also mean Cricket, Lacrosse, Tennis, Golf (well, sometimes), Softball, Track and Field, Rugby, and pretty much every other sport there is. I pay real, actual, US legal tender - which, per its stated claim, is good for servicing all debts and - to be able to watch my favorite baseball team lose year after year d...

Shows I want to See

Oh, Summer. It's that wonderful time of year where all the joys and pleasures of Spring are amplified until all but the most dedicated aficionados complain about them. Spring's gentle warmth becomes Summer's "Turn on the AC, damnit!" Spring flowers yield Summer allergies. Spring prom dates turn to Summer exes. And of course, Spring's television glory is succeeded by a Summer of executives putting literally anything in their lineup, because they know nobody's really watching. "You think there'...

How to Successfully Query Your Manuscript

Let's face it: the book scene is pretty crowded these days. If your agent query or publisher submissions aren't super-awesome-crazy-wow, chances are you're not getting a response, unless it's a computer-generated rejection. To help both the aspiring authors who read my blog, here are ten tips for submission success:

1) Write a form letter which you will send to agents and publishers. Never modify this letter. Don't even insert names, just leave "Dear [Agent/Publisher]" at the top. They know wh...