Adam Thomas's Blog, page 8

Spring Cling up

In Northern Michigan, ‘Spring’ really doesn’t exist. We experience winter and have the month of July. Maybe August, if we are lucky. Other than that, the weather is just … weather. Still, the concept of Spring cleaning has taken a hold of this dude.  Without even thinking of it, I was getting things accomplished. Checking tasks off a to do list is quite satisfying.

Thankfully, my blog was ‘cleaned’ a few months back. However, I realized one item needed to be wrapped up – literally.

the culinary ‘after thought’

Plastic wrap was originally made of polyvinyl chloride (PVC) plastic, which is notoriously hard to recycle and its toxicity has been questionable. However, low density polyethylene (LDPE) is becoming more common, and manufacturers have been continually improving their products to create totally non-toxic food wraps.
The accidental invention of plastic wrap in 1933 is attributed to Ralph Wiley from Dow Chemical. The substance was originally used by the military as a spray on planes and other vehicles, to protect them from rust and other deterioration.
Plastic wrap was not developed as a food wrap until 1949, when it was first used in the food industry, and it was not until 1953 that it was available for home use.

Granted plastic wrap doesn’t have too many loose ends. (pun intended) But, my made FOR cooking post a few weeks back had one. And, I’m in cleaning mode – don’t fuck with me when I’m in the mode.

Yes and No

… plastic wrap can be used in the microwave. It is recommend that users poke holes for steam ventilation. However, high fat food (gross) can melt the plastic wrap if heated to a high enough temperature. (grosser) By the way, I so disagree. I never use it in the microwave.

… plastic wrap is not to be used in conventional ovens, stove tops, or toaster ovens. The plastic will melt if used in any of these cooking units. Duhhh! Though, I’m certain some of my dumb-ass customers have tried this. Then, they called the pharmacy because they got burned.

common uses –

Plastic wrap will protect food when in the freezer. It is recommended that no air be between the plastic wrap and the food.  That will help protect the food from freezer burn. Yeah, Good luck with the ‘no air’ thing.

uncommon uses –

It has been rumored that a piece of Saran Wrap can be used as an impromptu condom. Unfortunately, it cannot withstand the friction of intercourse. And, its barrier protection is inadequate, to say the least.  Imagine that?!

Plastic wrap is touted by some spas as a means of permanently losing weight. The application of plastic wrap dipped in an herbal substance causes sweating, which is supposed to detoxify the body, aiding in weight loss. First of all, permanent should never be used when discussing weight loss unless certain lifestyle choices are formidably maintained. Second, those that even think this would be permanent should rethink more than just their weight loss intentions. 

the final seal 

Well, my culinary after thought is officially thunk. One more thing checked off that list.

Happy Spring Clinging!

Gumballs Keep Falling on my Head

I’m bangin’ a postal Crazy Ivan to discuss the wonderful invention of … bubble gum.  Actually, it wasn’t really an invention, but a mistake.  Now, over 100,000 tons of bubble gum is chewed every year all around the world.

In 1928, Walter Diemer was working as an accountant for the Fleer Chewing Gum Company in Philadelphia; what he wound up doing in his spare time was playing around with new gum recipes. But this latest batch was less sticky than regular chewing gum and it stretched more easily.

My reintroduction to bubble gum began in my travel hockey days.  Driving around Michigan and neighboring territories can be a little boring. Consequently, I got tired. At one of my daughter’s games, some parents and I were talking about ways to combat ‘the drive’. One father suggested chewing gum. By doing this, the yawn ‘complex’ is interrupted. Hence, your body no longer follows suit.  Added bonus, the muscles in your jaw get a more chiseled appearance.  Nice.

rainblo of flavors

Over the years, sweeteners in gum have changed. The Sugar-Free mania introduced Aspartame into the majority of chewing AND bubble gum varieties. I avoid that fake shit. Unfortunately, finding clean alternatives is hard. That is if you consider sugar and sometimes  even high fructose corn syrup clean. Hmmm… .

Bazooka – the hard beginnings – a childhood memory 
Hubba Bubba – very soft, but very sweet- it contains sugar AND aspartame. Gross!
Glee / Spry – more chewing gum than bubble gum – a healthy alternative, though
Dubble Bubble – individual wrapped option – I drop things on the car floor. A lot. Wanna a piece?
Rainblo – my personal favorite – every Easter Rainblo has egg-shaped gumballs. Fun and festive.

random gumballs

A mathematician once calculated that the energy Americans expend everyday when chewing bubble gum was enough to light a city of ten million people.
When your popped bubble gets stuck in your hair, you can remove it by rubbing the piece stuck with peanut butter
It is believed that ancient Greeks found relief from stress by chewing a gum that was made from a resin.
In Africa, it was said that various tribes accepted large quantities of bubble gum in lieu of sheep and oxen, as payment for a wife.
Chewing bubble gum is said to keep one from crying, as it reduces stress and helps in concentration.
 Swallowed bubble gum will not get stuck to your intestines, but will pass through your system. Gum base cannot be digested, as it has fiber that is indigestible.
Studies suggest that chewing gum can help you concentrate, improve long-term and working memory, reduce muscle tension, and increase alertness.

popping the proverbial bubble

Susan Montgomery Williams set the Guinness World Record for largest bubblegum bubble ever blown at 26 inches (66 cm) in diameter back in 1996.
Chad Fell holds the record for “Largest Hands-free Bubblegum Bubble” at 20 inches (51 cm), achieved on 24 April 2004.

I’m not entirely sure what a hands-free bubble is. I have an idea, but sounds kinda sketch. Regardless, the bubble gum flavor in this post has run out. Before I get hard and lumpy, I will close. There’s only a small window of opportunity to get rid of that wad, ya know. The aftertaste of over-chewed gum is just nasty. Besides, it’s a wonderful time for a … Bedtime Story?

behind the Dora door

When I thought about Dora and her new adventures into adulthood, a few, very Random thoughts popped into mind. Imagine that, eh?  Actually, those thoughts were limited to two names and … one Disney movie?

Believe it or not, all three are related. Really. I just hope to hell I can present what I want to convey in a readable, non-random fashion.

Lindsay Lohan‘s work won her childhood stardom, and the sleeper hit Mean Girls (2004) affirmed her status as a teen idol. After starring in Herbie: Fully Loaded (2005), she quickly became the subject of intense media coverage following a series of personal struggles and legal trouble, as well as stints in rehabilitation facilities, which led to the loss of several roles and significantly impacted her career and public image

Marilyn Chambers, the pretty Ivory Snow soap girl helped bring hard-core adult films into the mainstream consciousness when she starred in the explicit 1972 movie “Behind the Green Door”.

Troy Bolton (Zac Efron) is captain of the basketball team and Gabriella Montez (Vanessa Hudgens), is a shy transfer student. Together, they try out for the lead parts in their High School Musical (HSM), and this causes division among all the school’s students. Despite other students’ attempts to thwart their dreams, Troy and Gabriella resist peer pressure and rivalry, inspiring others along the way not to “stick to the status quo“.

Unfortunately, that damn Map led Dora away from the innocence of HSM to Behind some Door that I’m certain Lindsay Lohan opened. Granted, Dora hasn’t gone completely Green like Ms. Chambers. However, there is an episode where Dora travels to a Vegas strip club for a bachelorette party.  So, … .

I know everything that transpired in HSM would never happen anywhere but on the Disney Channel. Still, it’s nice to think otherwise.  My 16 year old daughter tells me constantly that middle school was so much worse than High School. Yikes!  Maybe that’s where Dora strayed? Maybe if she hung with Troy and Gabriella, she would’ve had her head in the correct game. Instead, she soared off that status quo trajectory and started checking pregnancy tests.

For me, some things just need to remain unscathed.  Dora should forever be trapped in her computer young and innocent and pure – when I say pure, it is NOT pure as … Ivory Snow! Okay? It sounds completely naive, but not all teen stars need to have a #Lindsaymeltdown. For ten years, mind you.

Anyway, I could go on. To continue, though, would be complete Nonsense. If that hasn’t happened already. Instead, I’m going to close the Door on this post, hoping I achieved my goal. Oh, I’m still not going to sing with Boots.  He’s too stoned to remember the lyrics.

Dora: Then and Now

Then

“Dora the Explorer” features the adventures of young Dora, her monkey Boots, Backpack and other animated friends. In each episode, viewers join Dora on an adventure in an animated world set inside a computer. The titular character seeks viewers’ help in solving a puzzle or mystery she faces in each episode. Common rituals may involve Dora’s encounters with Swiper, a masked thieving fox. To stop Swiper, Dora must say “Swiper no swiping” three times. When ‘lost’, Dora finds the right path to follow from Map. The episode always ends with Dora successfully reaching the locale, singing the “We Did It!” song with Boots in triumph.

First episode date: August 14, 2000

Final episode date: June 5, 2014

Honestly, my kids watched Dora by default.  It was often sandwiched between more desired shows. Yet even when it filled that transitional ‘void’, my kids were never engaged. No particular reason. It’s quite random what attracts the attention of children (and adults, for that matter). Dora had a good run. Fourteen years is quite an accomplishment for any television show — especially a cartoon.  Thankfully, we purchased very few novelty show-based items. Birthday presents from classmates or friends who actually watched the show were inevitable, though.


Now

During that long running stint, Dora never really ‘aged’.  That changed. In the short three to four year period after the show ended, she made up for lost time, baby.  Now, she’s 24 and has her share of issues.

AOK is the home to hilarious topical animations and live action comedy sketches poking fun at everything from politics to pop culture. You can find parodies of Donald Trump, Kanye West, Super Smash Bros., Dora the Explorer, the Power Rangers, and more. Melting faces one short at a time. Presented by The Jackal Group.

Fortunately, Dora still has her trusty companions.  However, after watching and episode or two, I wonder if that is really the best thing for our heroine.*

Boots – resembles the unfortunate result of too much recreational dispensary visits.
backpack – Dora should’ve upgraded long ago. That damn backpack has been through a lot.
map – a global trajectory update is needed here as well. From what I’ve viewed, Map has misdirected Dora more than once on her road to adulthood.
Swiper – has’t graduated from Petty Theft to Grand Larceny. Yet. He is still quite the sly fox.  Though, his swiping now requires more damage control than ever before.

*I probs should’ve reconsidered my word choice, considering some of Dora’s NEW adventures.

Ironically enough, my daughter found this by default. YouTube ‘recommended’ the video because she is such a huge Big Mouth fan. While we appreciate the concept, we’re not fond of Dora The Grown Up. Alas, I’ve decided to save my commentary for the next post.  Like cling wrap, there’s a few ‘after thoughts’ I’d like to mention. Don’t be concerned – I promise NOT to break out into song with Boots. But, I have successfully reached my locale.

“We Did It!”

made FOR cooking

Well, I’ve officially left the shop. Thankfully.  Regardless of content, two pharmacy talks in a row is rather much. So for this post, I’m going to my happy place. (Pause)

It’s the damn kitchen, okay.  That was not intended to sound creepy by the way.

I realize talking cooking sheet liners is quite Random, but there is nothing Nonsensical about it.  According to both Martha and that Pioneer Woman, this IS important sheet. (pun intended) Initially, I was going to include cling wrap. Then, decided that should be a follow-up post. One ‘special’ Saran use just warranted being singled out. Besides, cling wrap is more of an after thought. These two kitchen bad boys are made FOR cooking.

Aluminum foil

This was my first covering for everything. Well, … almost everything. (Pause) Though recently, this go to kitchen aide has been put through the “mill” more than once.

two sides to every story

According to Reynold’s Kitchen, the difference in appearance between the two sides of aluminum foil is simply a result of manufacturing and serves no real purpose.

” … the foil is “milled” in layers during production. The two layers are in contact with each other at the same time, if this was not done, the foil would break during the milling process. Where the foil is in contact with another layer, that’s the “dull” side. The “shiny” side is the side milled without being in contact with another layer. The performance of the foil is the same, whichever side you use.”

to wrap or not to wrap?

Over the years, rumors have swirled about high levels of aluminum leading to health risks including Alzheimer’s and kidney disease. The truth is aluminum is all around (even in the water supply), and regular contact does not appear to cause problems. Furthermore, The body has numerous mechanisms to help rid the body of excess amounts of this metal. So, the answer is easy – wrap it up, baby.

Parchment paper

Not sure how, but one day I ditched the culinary aide bling and went parchment white. I blame Martha Stewart – she loves a nice piece of … paper. She’s very cautious, too. Every recipe I’ve used of her’s actually requires both – wrap the food in parchment paper, then cover with foil. She really doesn’t want to get that bun in the oven.  Burned, eh?

fun facts –

Parchment paper is grease and moisture-resistant paper specially treated for oven use.
cool alternative for baking – parchment paper cupcake liners. Subtle, yet sophisticated.

according to the Pioneer woman –

even baking – neutralizes hot spots
parchment paper gives cookies something to hold onto – they have feelings too, ya know.
eliminates sticking
parchment paper allows foods to breathe when wrapped.
easy clean up

Side Note Nevers

AVOID the cheap alternative that is wax paper – could start a fire. I was never a fan even before I read this.
Cooking bags – my mother swears by these whenever she cooks a turkey. Personally, I don’t trust them. I brine my bird, baby.  Also, I love that skin crispy.

After all this unNonsense about cooking, I’m hungry.  Thankfully, my son has returned home for Spring Break. I need to get busy. The kitchen is open!

IWIK(W)

I’m talking shop. Again. But, this is different.  And, I am going to spill the tea on a new managerial technique that encourages employee engagement. (Pause) Don’t worry, though. I’m still angry. However, this ‘initiative’ is kinda fun – when you spin it. Trust me.

A few months back, I walked into the break room. Plastered all over the walls were these handwritten ‘notes’. Apparently, a new series of staff meetings started. The goal was to get the proverbial ‘pulse’ on what employees were thinking and feedback about customer issues. Oh, and how to fix both. Yikes, ugh, and oh, it will never happen were my initial thoughts. Thankfully, I am not required to attend. There’s an implied understanding that my opinions are better left unsaid.  Or, blogged about.

As I glanced around the room, I noticed a consistent ‘theme’. Every subject was presented as a question. Each question started with an IWIK . “WTF is IWIK?” I wondered. 

Intrigued, I questioned a fellow dark sider who WAS required to attend.  IWIK means I Wish I Knew.  Furthermore, a (W) is often included because the majority of the questions continue with the word Why.

example – IWIKW all the tress change in the Fall?

Then, the floor opens to ‘conversation’ in an attempt to engage employees to answer the proposed question.

So happy it’s above my pay grade to attend.

To embrace my postal essence, I decided to do a Random Nonsense version. Since this is my first attempt to answer burning questions of the universe,  I will keep it light and only include one unfortunate work related issue. 

IWIKW … one side of the road entering my subdivision has less snow pack than the other side?

According to unsubstantiated sources, tires are cold whenever a car leaves the subdivision. On return, the heated rubber gradually melts the snow on that corresponding side of the road.

IWIKW … the store manager is more concerned about receipt survey scores than employee safety.

He is an insensitive douchebag. Why else?  Now more than ever considering recent, tragic events.  (Briefly – at a North Carolina competitor, a disgruntled customer shot two pharmacy personnel – point blank.)

A young co-worker/technician voiced her concern about what safety measures could be implemented locally. Instead of being empathetic to said concerns,  his response was “how will that help our receipt survey total?“
Once again, I’m thankful I was not there. I would have definitely engaged in more than conversation. 

IWIKW … award shows have such a difficult time securing high profile hosts/entertainers?

First and foremost, no one can please everyone. Someone is going to be offended. That alone negatively impacts performance. Adam Levine performed with Big Boi who arrived ‘on stage’ in a convertible Cadillac Superbowl Sunday. Neither collaborated previously. So, consequently the result is going to be kinda’ awkward. Moreover, social media and critics suck.  In most cases, everyone that posts negative shade has probably never done anything imilar in their lives. 

Lastly, and because I’m getting a bit too serious, I decided to close with something way fun.

IWIKW … my daughter has such good taste in music?

The answer is obvious, of course. She IS my daughter.

slather up

Time to talk shop again. This time however, it IS a known problem for which numerous resources ARE truly available. Moreover, my subject is appropriately timed. And, it’s NOT angry.  Imagine that – something pharmacy related that doesn’t cause anger. Who knew?
My shop topic is … dry skin.
Sorry, it’s not as exciting as the introduction implied.  But, it affects pretty much everyone this time of year and it can be rather bothersome.
scientific shit

L98.8 –Other specified disorders of the skin and subcutaneous tissue

Xeroderma  is derived from the Greek words for “dry skin”.

The main culprit

Lack of moisture  –

During winter, the humidity in the outside air plunges – inside, things are even drier. Then, washing your hands more frequently decreases whatever natural oils are left in your skin.
The skin barrier is a mix of proteins, lipids, and oils. It protects the the skin – it’s thickness dictates reactions to harsh conditions.
Just like everything else, it’s all about them genes, baby.

For me, I blame my profession.  That and flu shots.  I am forever washing my hands.  Also, that powdery shit inside disposable gloves wreaks havoc on my epidermis. 

those available resources

Emollients act as lubricants on the surface on the skin. They fill the crevices between cells that are ready to be shed and help the loose edges of the dead skin cells that are left behind stick together. Ingredients such as lanolin, jojoba oil, squalene, and glycerol stearate generally cause that slippery feeling you get after applying a moisturizer.

Humectants draw moisture from the environment to the skin’s surface, increasing the water content of the skin’s outer layer. Common humectants are glycerin, hyaluronic acid, urea, and lactic acid. These tend to be absorbed into the skin more readily. Translation: less residual ickyness on hands.

During my almost thirty years in retail (insert: heavy sigh), I worked the midnight shift. Back then, winter storms weren’t named- snide comment intended. One February, my hands were screaming from the endless winter. I went out onto the sales floor and  tested every available hand cream stocked. My criteria for day use of hand cream is very short – no greasy residue after application and fragrance-free. The two products I found then are still my  favorites even today. Consequently, they  both start with the letter most often found on my college transcript.

Curel
Cerave

Recently, I discovered O’Keeffe’s Working Hand’s. Wow! This stuff really … works.  Though, there is the slightest grittiness after being applied.  Other than that, this is some good shit, man.

prevention 

drink lots of water to maintain hydration
vitamin supplements with biotin and  hyaluronic acid
eat Jello – gelatin is amazing for hair, skin, and nails.  Besides, it’s fun – it really does jiggle
when hand washing – use warm water and mild soap.  If necessary, hand sanitizer may be substituted according to my uncited source.  I disagree. I hate that shit – the smell is gross. And, it’s alcohol based.  How is that good?  My hands cower from pain on contact with that stuff.
humidifier – room units or  incorporated into furnace add moisture to the air

Well, that’s about it. I am officially washing my hands of the topic. I will generously apply hand cream afterward, of course. Hope the information was useful.  I can’t remember what that damn Groundhog saw, or didn’t see for that matter. Either way, slather up. There’s lots of winter still to come.

location location … legalization?

I workout – a lot.  In fact, this blog has highlighted more than its share of Fitness Fodder – from boxing tutorials  to the bimbo and her ‘bitch’ of a power couple. All in all, the gym serves the purposes of this Average Joe well. And, it should come as no surprise that I’m not the most social person when I workout. I do the standard guy ‘nod’ acknowledgement to acquaintances and small talk with my more than regulars, of course. That’s about it. My goal is to stay fit.  That and so I can eat freely without too much concern. I’m 53 and I’s gots me a six pack and buns of steel. Yeah, baby!

My gym kinda reminds me of an independent pharmacy.  The owners even purchased the building years ago to solidify their independence. Unfortunately, times are tough for small businesses.  A large health club chain offering pizza Tuesday and bagel Friday opened a few miles away. Nice promotions, eh? Within the last year, there has been a drastic decline in patronage. Granted, I frequent the gym at non-peak hours intentionally. Still, their absence has been noticeable. Once I casually expressed concern about the issue. I was assured that there were plenty of members paying dues.

Lastly, the main reason I chose this facility was its location.  The few times I’ve actually considered changing for various, yet substantiated reasons, I decided otherwise. It’s just too damn convenient. So, I looked past those (pauses intended)  circumstances and adapted accordingly.

Six months ago, I heard rumor that the building was FOR SALE.  Taxes at that location were over inflated.  The goal was to sell the building then relocate the gym ‘a mile down the road‘ outside the city’s limits.

I didn’t panic.  Yet,  somehow I knew the arrangement was not physically fit.

This past week, my concern was validated.  The building SOLD. However, the new owners intend to utilize only the front third of the building for their business.  The remaining space would be leased to the gym. Win-Win for everyone, eh?

Yeah, not so much.

Apparently, the new owners are planning to open a recreational marijuana dispensary in their intended space.  The new gym entrance would be relocated to the back of the building. Next to the … alley.

Proposition One – legalization of marijuana in Michigan – passed last November. Political views/support of such legislature  aside, I am still a pharmacist – a registered professional.  Frequenting a gym located behind even a legalized dispensary is a conflicting conundrum.  Did I mention the entrance is next to the alley?

Totally sketch if you ask me. (Insert: heavy sigh)

Honestly, I knew my Average Joe’s days were limited. It was inevitable. Patches may be resting in ADAA heaven, but there was no way I am going to dodge, duck, dip, dive or dodge this wrench.

Red Red Wine

Wow, red wine really does go to your head, eh? There was so much I wanted to include, but just couldn’t. So, I decided to put a Hollywood film title spin on my presentation, keeping my comments and rhetoric to a minimum.  Cited sources say “moderate red wine consumption is better for you than not drinking at all. ” 

the royal TANNIN baums

Pretty much everything in wine that’s not alcohol or water is a type of polyphenol – including tannin, color pigment, and wine aromas. The most abundant for health reasons are Procyanidins*, a condensed tannin also found in green tea and dark chocolate.

Young red wines contain greater tannin levels, yielding a higher astringency. Therefore, these wines have more health benefits.

the AGE of innocence 

Red wine is heralded for its ageability. However, it must be stored properly. Factors that affect the aging process are temperature, light and humidity. Red wines should be stored at about 55° Fahrenheit.
Red wines contain “structure”.  Inherent traits that preserve them longer than white wines.
As red wine ages, it becomes less intense in color.

the GRAPES of wrath

Red grapes are older than white wine grapes
All of the most common red wines are of just one species of grape: Vitis vinifera.
The color in wine comes from a plant pigment called anthocyanin, which is found in the skins of red grapes.

the BUCKET list

Cabernet Sauvignon – One of the best selling varietals of red wine in the United States. Cabernets are generally big, full bodied and tannic.
Merlot – These medium-bodied wines are less tannic than Cabernets.
Pinot Noir – This red wine is growing very quickly in popularity. Pinots are typically medium to light bodied with a soft tannic structure.
Syrah (Shiraz) – Syrahs have great forward fruit flavors with a hint of pepper and spice.
Zinfandel – Zins run the gamut in flavor characteristics and range from big and hearty to light and delicate.

California, for example, is well known for its Cabernet, but not world renowned, as France is for its Bordeaux or Italy is for its Barolo. Australia is the only country that produces Shiraz and while it does have slightly different flavor characteristics than Syrah, it is arguably the same wine.

No COUNTRY for Old Men

Terroir is the complete natural environment in which a particular wine is produced and has a deep impact on the thickness of the skin and the overall sugar content. Climate and regionality matter almost as much as the genetic differences in the red wine grapes

the GLASS castle

There are two main shapes for red wine glasses: the tall, tapered Bordeaux glass and the wide bowl Burgundy glass.

Consequently, I have broken every stemmed wine glass I’ve owned.  Damn things are just too fragile. Solution – stemless wine glasses.

Doctor Strange 

The antioxidants found in red wine lower incidences of cardiovascular disease, mortality, and type-2 diabetes.  *Procyanidins are specifically associated with inhibiting cholesterol plaque in blood vessels, which is highly beneficial to heart health and longevity.  That is why when it comes to the health aspects of wine, old wine isn’t as good!

cited source – https://winefolly.com/tutorial/facts-about-red-wine/

Goal – red wine with high tannins and low alcohol.  I realize that’s not fun, but it is what the doctor ordered. If it aged too long, this musical selection would’t be as appropriate.

Sources also say, “a moderate reading of Random Nonsense is better than none at all.”                                                     

All three, All FREE, All day

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All three , All FREE, All day!
Sunday February 3, 2019

Happy reading!