Evan Sanders's Blog, page 45

If You Haven’t Tried, You Haven’t Lived

If you haven’t tried, you haven’t lived.

It’s hard to put yourself on the line each and every day.

It’s hard to continue to keep yourself open to life completely. Vulnerably. Open for wounding and yet open to all of the experiences that lay before you.

There’s a tendency to get scared and want to build walls to close yourself up. But you can’t do that. You can’t do that because it will limit the rest of your life and will stop you from truly living.

I get into that today in the video above.

Don’t die an un-lived life.

-Evan Sanders

Interested in working with me personally and making some big changes in 2016? Below are a list of my different coaching programs and what I offer. Every link is accompanied by a full description of what is in each program. Looking forward to working with you!

FREE 9 Lesson Transformation Program – http://www.timetolevelup.guru/

Email Coaching #LevelUpTribe – http://vuytwjv3.megaph.com/

1 on 1 Phone / Skype Coaching Sessions – http://1on1.timetolevelup.guru/

“On Your Way” 3 Pack Transformation – http://onyourway.timetolevelup.guru/

Fully Customized Coaching Programs – http://transform.timetolevelup.guru/

And Then…He Grew His Wings

When I sit back and look at all now, I begin to understand what this was all about.

This 5 years of writing. This 5 years of exploring. The constant effort of shedding old skin and learning what was going to be evoked in me.

I see it all…as if the dots had just suddenly connected behind me. And truth be told, it actually makes some sense to me.

Everything that I’ve gone through. All the ways I’ve transformed. It all just kind of clicked and I realized what was in front of me.

The greatest adventure of my life.

I had been freed up from everything that was holding me back and transformed into someone who was completely open and ready to take on an experience that not many get to take.

Throughout this year, I’ve been thinking of this adventure, but never really was at the point of knowing whether or not it was real. But as the days of this week slipped by, I realized that something I had been working so hard for and what I had only dreamed of actually turned into…

A real possibility.

When that hit me, I was a bit shocked. Shocked to the point where I actually stopped everything completely to make sure it was real. It was. As real as real could be.

New blood came to me.

New fire into this heart.

I had been making moves here, but I knew that I was starting to get stagnant. I knew that something else out there was starting to call my name and wanted me to take another risk. I knew that the path I was destined to take was different than everyone else’s.

I’ve known I was a bit different since I was little…and I used to not like that…

But now I love it.

Now I realize that’s exactly where my magic is and I cherish it being there. That’s the thing that’s going to help me get to the stage on day and touch hearts.

When my purpose bubbled up in March of this year, I knew something was going to change about my life.

What I didn’t understand in the moment was exactly where the word “encouragement” was going to take me. It was no longer about motivation or inspiration, but about encouraging others.

What has unfolded over the past few months is something that has taken on a life of its own and finally caused everything else to pop. Something I always knew would happen…and it finally did.

There’s something to be said here about trust as well. I’ve been asking myself the question of what trust really means to me a lot lately and I’ve been discovering where my definitions really exist.

It’s hard to trust in something when you can’t see it…but I think it makes it even more valuable when you can really trust in those same things you cannot see.

You start to trust in the cyclical nature of things.

You being to trust in those gut feelings.

You being to trust in the process.

My life has been moving at about 100mph since the begging of this year and I know that the greatest changes are just about to happen…

But those changes were preceded by 5 years of getting ready for it all.

And I’m about to show up to the party.

-Evan Sanders

 

What Happened…Happened

You have survived 100% of the bad days that have ever happened to you. But here’s the thing that’s actually going to help you heal…

Acceptance.

You see without actually getting to a place of “what happened happened…and it couldn’t have happened any other way…”

You stop living in reality.

Instead, you live in a world of “should haves” and “what if’s?”

But the facts are the facts.

And if you get to a place of really accepting what actually occurred, you free yourself up to actually living in reality again.

Sure that reality may sting and hurt a bit, but you open yourself up to a world of recovery and actually taking care of yourself.

Then…

You get to a place of “what’s going to happen is going to happen…and it’s going to be the most perfect thing for me.”

Wow. So, through acceptance, you stop living in the past and you forget about living in the future because you know you will be taken care of.

Then…BANG…connection with the present moment…the only moment you have.

Tune into today’s video, I think you will get a kick out it.

Time to ‪#‎levelup‬

 

Interested in working with me personally and making some big changes in 2016? Below are a list of my different coaching programs and what I offer. Every link is accompanied by a full description of what is in each program. Looking forward to working with you!

FREE 9 Lesson Transformation Program – http://www.timetolevelup.guru/

Email Coaching #LevelUpTribe – http://vuytwjv3.megaph.com/

1 on 1 Phone / Skype Coaching Sessions – http://1on1.timetolevelup.guru/

“On Your Way” 3 Pack Transformation – http://onyourway.timetolevelup.guru/

Fully Customized Coaching Programs – http://transform.timetolevelup.guru/

A Romance With A Hint Of Madness

Markus Wächter; Digital, 2008, Photograph “Way Out”

Touch me.

I am the darker sides of you. The colors you have neglected for some time and the sides that are begging to come out.

Touch me.

You will learn so many things about yourself if you walk down the stairs to fine me…

Dwelling deep within the recesses of your soul.

Touch me. Hold me. Love me.

I will add depth to the strokes of light you paint onto the canvas. I will add harmony to the chaos that you tried to avoid for such a long time. If you love me, I will bring out deep unhealed pains in you…

To give you the chance to heal them.

I will make you shake in your boots and want to run as quickly as lightning strikes the ground. But if you stay, I will show you something you’ve never seen before. Beauty in the depths. Beauty in the cracks of your heart.

I will show you things you’ve only dreamed of…the thoughts that dance in and out of your mind as you shut your eyes. But you must first touch me. You must first decide that you’re going to be with me.

I am your shadow.

The depths and the darkness inside of you. And what good is light without its proper counterpart? What good is light without some contrast.

Because if all we see is light, we get used to its presence. We get familiar with it and start to under appreciate it.

But if you let me in, I will show you a full life. A life full of wonder and mystery. A life with a hint of madness. A deep romance…one with grand pleasure…and one with great pain.

Because there cannot exist one without the other. With anyone, there is some madness in real things. In this world of smokescreens and shadows, real things don’t come along very often.

Our objects lack depth.

Our people are afraid of the depths themselves.

But to the man or woman who isn’t scared to jump off the cliff and tumble down the rabbit hole…how much they will discover…

The greatest journey begins in not a step forward, but the opening up of the ground underneath you and a falling into something that will bring magic out of your being.

So touch me…

And I will change you.

-Evan Sanders

[NOTE: Time to make a change in the new year!? I have created a FREE life coaching training program called the 9 Secrets To A Good Life that has officially launched! If you want to be part of this training please take a second to sign up by clicking here or on the picture below!]

 

Without Patience, The Dreams Never Show Up

This year isn’t going to be your year if you aren’t patient enough to see the things you’ve dreamed of all the way through to the end.

The challenges will come your way, but so will the victories…if you have endless amounts of patience.

If you let people take your intensity away, you are damning yourself to a life of mediocrity.

Never let anyone take your passion away.

Never let anyone steal your intensity.

Never tone yourself down to make someone feel less insecure about the fact that they are not chasing their dreams.

Do your thing. Do it big.

Do it with all the passion, focus, and determination you can this year.

Because if you don’t, this year will be exactly the same as last year.

People often will tell you that you can’t do something because they can’t do it.

They can’t see it for themselves so in order to keep you “in check” and not making them look bad, they will instill doubt into your mind.

You must recognize this when it’s happening, and eradicate it immediately.

Because once that doubt starts creeping and crawling around in there, you’re screwed.

Your internal critic is harsh enough…you don’t need other people putting negativity into your heart.

So surround yourself with positive people who believe in you and who will support you life crazy.

Time to #levelup

– Evan Sanders

Interested in working with me personally and making some big changes in 2016? Below are a list of my different coaching programs and what I offer. Every link is accompanied by a full description of what is in each program. Looking forward to working with you!

FREE 9 Lesson Coaching Program- http://www.timetolevelup.guru/

Email Coaching #LevelUpTribe – http://vuytwjv3.megaph.com/

1 on 1 Phone / Skype Coaching Sessions – http://1on1.timetolevelup.guru/

“On Your Way” 3 Pack Transformation – http://onyourway.timetolevelup.guru/

Fully Customized Coaching Programs – http://transform.timetolevelup.guru/

Planting Seeds Of The Unknown

I have no intention of staying found.

I have every intention of getting lost.

I have every intention of bringing every single last gift I’ve been given out in me and using it to burn the whole f’ing forest down (metaphorically speaking).

I’m not here to impress you. I’m here to speak to your heart. I’m here to break down all of your barriers, every single boundary you’ve ever constructed and tear down the walls. I’m not going to stroke your ego. I’m not going to sugarcoat it.

I will tell you what will serve your heart…even though that may be painful at times.

But I will also speak possibility into you. I will tell you of the grand adventures and tales that rest before you. I will show you a world that you didn’t know existed. I will  take you into a dreamland…one that could easily become a reality if you walk in faith.

I will take you there…because I’ve gone there myself.

And here I am at the beginning of the year, just steps out of the dream asking myself if I can do it all again? Could I give another 15 years of my life to something so grand that it transcends anything I ever imagined? Could I sit here and give everything I’ve got for years and years at a time to see a vision through that is far beyond my comprehension of what is going on right now?

Something inside me whispers yes.

Something inside me knows that it is possible.

It is, because I’ve seen it happen.

Little did I know that a budding writing project that wasn’t intended for anyone to see would lead to all of this. But there was always that whisper of a thrill…

Knowing that one thing would lead to another and another and another and eventually seeds would bloom in ways that were unpredictable.

We plant seeds of the unknown and nourish a garden that we have no idea  how it will exactly grow. We don’t know because the seeds we plant get buried deep in the dirt and as we tend to them they change.

The foundations of our life change.

Who we are deep down changes as we feel things shifting deep inside that we might not be able to understand at the moment.

But when we look back, we can see. We can see what we once felt. What an amazing experience that is…to be able to witness the changes that occurred in our lives when we finally gave up having to know everything and put our hands in the hands of whatever is taking care of us. This is an experience that has changed my life time and time again and now sitting here…I am asking for it to take me again.

I trust that whatever is watching over me will handle everything that is out of my control. Truthfully, most of it is out of my control. But there are certain things that are right in my wheelhouse that I need to take care of every single day.

I need to show up giving my heart.

I need to heal myself because I can truly heal others.

I need to continue loving and have my hand outstretched for those to take it.

Some days are much harder than others. Some days are an absolute grind but those are the days that you must dive farther and farther into your faith. You have to dig in rather than give up. You have to be wiling to put yourself to the test even when all the of the gunfire is headed your way.

The mystery of planting those seeds is one of the most challenging and yet gratifying actions there is. I know, that deep down I have to continue down this path I’m on. I have sat in this seat time and time again but never has anything felt as driven as the moments I am currently in. Part of me felt exhausted after everything that happened this Holiday season. But the other part knows that it’s time to move forward and continue on a journey that is only just beginning.

In a way, I felt like everything I’ve done over the past 5 years has prepared me for these moments to come. All of the training, all of the writing, all of the trials and tribulations coming my way. The tests have been endless and yet here I am still breathing.

In a way, I take great pride in my story.

In another way, I know that another one is waiting to be written.

So let’s keep writing.

-Evan Sanders

[NOTE: Time to make a change in the new year!? I have created a FREE life coaching training program called the 9 Secrets To A Good Life that has officially launched! If you want to be part of this training please take a second to sign up by clicking here or on the picture below!]

Forging Ahead In The Dark, Shedding Light As You Go

There’s only a moment.

A moment where you get to make the most important decision of your life. This moment arrives and can be gone in an instant. And there you are…moment upon you…with the ability to decide…

Turn away or forge ahead.

The challenges never end. They come upon you without mercy and test your resolve, foundation, and character without rest. The challenges are there to teach you and see what you are made of.

But you do get to decide.

Do you escape?

Or do you anchor in?

This moment came to me only a few days ago upon making one of the bigger decisions of my life. A moment that could have added massive amounts of confusion and yet brought about clarity. In a quarter of the year that was very confusing, stressful, and demanding that I step up to the plate and really give it everything I could have…this moment, a test, delivered a huge sigh of relief.

But how could that be?

How could more pressure settle everything?

It did. All I did with that was nod my head and know that instead of re-reouting my entire life I actually had to continue down the path I was currently on. I kept on hearing the voice inside saying…

Forge ahead. 

Forge ahead.

You’re almost there, don’t quit now. 

Yes…and there was the Captain again gripping the wheel even tighter ready to continue plowing through trying waters. There was no turning back. There was no going in another direction. There was only what was right in front of him and what he had seen all those months ago.

I knew I had lost my focus. I knew I had lost my momentum.

I was looking constantly to see if the end result was there and it was always “just right around the corner.” But I didn’t see the whole thing through. I didn’t stay according to plan because of discouragement.

But a renewed sense of purpose came to me.

And with that purpose, the fire inside started to light again. Another day, another effort, and another opportunity to move forward in the direction I wished for.

A year of renewal…of the same damn vision I’ve had for about 7 months now.

We strive to be the grandest versions of ourselves daily and most of the time we come up short. But that’s the beautiful part of all of this. Because without seeing beyond what we are right now we can never grow. We must see what is inside of us and attempt to bring out those characteristics to the best of our ability.

Yes we will fail time and time again.

But there is glory in the effort.

There is something to be said for the person that fails over and over again and yet they keep coming to the table with enthusiasm and a willingness to try again.

Because one day will be their day.

One day, they will see it through all the way to the end when others would have given up years and years ago.

Take pride in your persistence.

Take pride in your grand efforts and grand failings.

The scars and the victories define you and make you into a bold soul that encourages any action that may bring on victory or defeat.

These are our heroes. Those who may not necessarily be in the lights…but who forge ahead in the darkness…shedding a light of their own.

-Evan Sanders

[NOTE: Time to make a change in the new year!? I have created a FREE life coaching training program called the 9 Secrets To A Good Life that has officially launched! If you want to be part of this training please take a second to sign up by clicking here or on the picture below!]

Tectonic Shifts Coming In 2016

2016 is your year.

It’s time to dive into a fully personalized coaching program built specifically for you and catered to what you are trying to create in this world. Make this year the best year of your life. Take it from those who have already gone through it…

“I am trusting in my gut and going with it.  Now everything is coming together.  I’m in an all out sprint without even having to work. I don’t have to force anything or push for anything to get to the next spot…everything is just coming to me.  Everything is coming along. It’s all just happening. It feels really good.  This is the best I have ever felt with where I am, who I am and being me.” – Michelle B.

“When I heard about his life coaching, I was immediately interested. The first time I talked to Evan on the phone, it was like talking to a lifetime friend. I was able to be honest and open with no holding back. We had a couple of great conversations then he presented my new story to me. I was completely blown away. It brought me to tears how much he “got me” and really heard me. Evan has this insane ability to listen to you pour your heart out (in my case) and then put into his own words how he interpreted it. He presented this story to me that described exactly who I am and what I’m wanting to change and gave me a new story that made me want to work my ass off for it because it’s so awesome! And he isn’t just summing up what you say. He really listens to what you’re saying and hears things that you didn’t even realize you said or mentioned. I have gotten so much more than I ever expected from this and it just started! I can’t wait to see what is to come and the progress I make through this journey!” – Amanda S.

“Working with Evan has been an experience that is quite different than any type of coaching I have had before. Evan has stood by my side encouraging a shift in consciousness. A shift that has been revitalizing. Frequently encouraging me to pause, appreciate, and draw from an abundance within.” – Jonathan D. 

You’re driven by a vision.

Whatever that vision may be for yourself, deep down you know it’s possible. You’re driven to see your dreams through, accomplish your goals, contribute to this world and achieve as much as you can. There’s something inside of you that lights up when you speak about your passions.

That’s what’s waiting to be released.

But how?

Time and time again you’ve attempted to step into that story – the dream – and find yourself falling back into old habits, being “stuck,” unmotivated, or unsure about which way to go. This can make you incredibly frustrated because you can see your potential but are not really anywhere close to living in that story every single day.

In the end, this makes you constantly as the question “Why isn’t any of this working? What’s wrong with me? Am I good enough? Do I have what it takes?” In fact, the voice of that internal critic runs away with your mind and drives the stake of frustration even further.

Don’t worry – this doesn’t have to be the story you live in forever.

There are other ways to live life, you just need some support and help.

And that’s exactly what you’re going to learn about today.

So let’s begin.

You have everything you need to step into that dream of yours, but need some help unlocking all of that from fears, doubts, worries, and the inner critic constantly telling you that it’s not actually possible.

What if you could unlock your greatest potential and step into a brand new story?

Take a second to think about that. Think about what’s possible for you right now – as far as you can see yourself – if you could free yourself from everything that was holding you back.

That’s possible. 

I don’t say that because it sounds good. I’m telling you this because I’ve seen it time and time again and I’ve lived that myself. I want you to live that story too.

There are a lot of reasons why you may be struggling. Most everyone comes face to face with fundamental fears that hold them back from achieving their true potential.

Fear of abandonment – I’m going to be left all by myself to deal with all of these feelings and difficulties on my own.

Fear of engulfment – I’m not going to be able to handle everything that is asked of me and be able to take care of myself, my commitments, and my life.

Fear of non-being – I’m not good enough. I am going to completely disappear from this world having made absolutely no difference.

Truth is, there are a lot of incredibly positive skills, traits, and characteristics that you have that are ready to be put to some serious good use. But like I’ve said before, you have to be able to unravel yourself from your old story to truly be able to realize everything that is possible for you.

So here’s the good news

I’m not going to ask you to fix anything. In fact, coaching is the farthest thing from “fixing” things. No, you deserve more than that. Instead, we develop – grow, shift, expand, contract, take things on and let the negatives drift away.

Here’s the better news. 

I am going to teach you everything you need to know to transform your mind, your body, and your soul. That’s why I call these transformation programs.

Why should you trust me to help you take your life to the next level?

Let me tell you a little bit more about my own personal journey from going from a struggling man with low self esteem, a complete lack of inner vision and personal power, and being completely restricted by emotions that trapped me mentally and physically in a place I knew I didn’t belong.

I was on track to become a Professional athlete back in college, but then as life would have it my elbow fell to pieces and just like that the dream I had since I was 5 years old was over.

I was absolutely heartbroken, devastated, and furious that life had “ripped the rug out from underneath me.”

After a year of having completely lost my way and not knowing what to do, I started to write. I was a horrible writer in high school but something called me to put words down onto paper.

So I put the pen down onto the paper and began a blog called The Better Man Project that was about my daily journey to become a better person and the lessons I was learning along the way.

Originally it was intended to be a 30 day project, but as soon as I started I was absolutely hooked. I knew this project was going to be something that I would do for the rest of my life.

To be honest, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing back then, but I knew that something good was going to come out from diving into those “caves of the soul” where everything inside of me was hiding.

Turned out I was right.

As the pages flowed, I learned more and more about myself, starting voraciously consuming books, devoted my life to never stop learning, started to live a life of taking big risks, found my deepest purpose and passions, brought love into my life, published two books and built a community of over 100,000 people who were devoted to building their best life as well.

I never could have predicted that all of this was going to happen. But that’s the thing about journey’s isn’t it? It’s the path that’s the most exciting part, not the destination.

But I knew that my own experience with life wasn’t enough which is why I sought out professional guidance through a Integral Coaching (Mind, Body, Soul) Graduate Program in San Francisco to help me build the foundations and competencies necessary to put all of my knowledge to good use, aid in my own development as a coach and to teach me exactly what was needed to help people unlock their lives.

Now I coach people all around the world of all ages who have dreams and ambitions.

It’s been an absolutely incredible journey and I’m not going to stop here.

 

So I’m here to tell you again, whatever your dreams and goals are, they are possible. I’m here to help you live a lifestyle that’s dedicated to diving into your full potential. I am certain that together we can see your dreams become a reality.

Time to transform your life.

So here’s a question for you: Do you want to step into a brand new story to see what’s possible for you?

If you’ve made it this far, I’m sure you do.

Then it’s time to do what’s necessary in order to bring those possibilities into your life. More importantly, it’s time to stop living in the world of “quick fixes” and other programs that offer you a simple solution to all of your problems.

Stop living in that place. You’re better than thinking that will work.

You have exactly what it takes to live your dream.

This is about diving into your life – your relationships, your internal world, your body, your environment – finding out where the weeds are and yanking them out, finding out what you are truly capable of and stepping into that story with courage and doing the things you’ve never done to achieve the results you’ve always wanted for yourself.

Yup…that’s right.

No quick fixes. No New Years Resolutions. No old way of living. Just stepping into something brand new for yourself and finally seeing what’s possible for your life. 

It’s time to transform your life.

So how will coaching work for you?

Coaching is invaluable in helping you cultivate the type of life you’ve always wanted to live as it helps you fall into a way of living that is focused on developing all areas of your life. The practice is truly holistic and you are truly seen as a whole human being rather than something that needs a few bandaids and needs “fixing.” I don’t believe in that word here.

When you step into a coaching program, you can expect to be pushed, stretched, held accountable, supported, and liberated from your fears in order to help you step into the life you’ve always dreamed of. 

We dive into the following…

Dreams, Goals, & Visions

Internal World (Thoughts & Emotions)

Body (Behavior & Physical)

Relationships 

Environment (Technology & Natural)

What’s In This Program?

Intake Calls / Consultations

1 Hr (Intake) Phone Call With Me

Life Coaching & Development Program

Weekly Skype / Phone / Face to Face (local only) coaching sessions over 3 to 6 months depending on the program
Tailor-made / personalized development plan
Specific goals and outcomes for your development
An in depth look at your current view of the world
An offer of a new view that will change your perspective and outlook on the world
Specific practices that will help you cultivate your outcomes
Self reflection, awareness, and observation exercises to keep you on plan
Resources (books, audio, speeches etc)

It’s time to live in a brand new way

That story that you’ve been living in for years and years? That doesn’t have to be the way you live. In fact, you can recreate your life at any time you would like. But you have to be willing to take the next step. You have to be willing to commit to bringing in new things for yourself.

Everyone I have worked with has made incredible transformations with their life and there will be many many more. I am prepared to guide you in the exact same way so you can enjoy a thriving life where you are out in the world making an impact instead of just surviving.

This is your opportunity. This is you chance to make a long-lasting change with your mind, your body, and your soul. 

It doesn’t matter what your dream is or your vision for yourself may be, I am here to help you change your game plan and make 2016 the best year of your life.

So take the next step. Step into exactly what you’ve always wanted for yourself.

What’s next?

Let’s book a free discovery call and see if we are a good fit for each other. I only take on a handful of clients because of how personalized each of the programs are.

Click here -> Book A Discovery Session or reach me through the contact form below to get in touch with me so we can schedule a free call and start down a path that will drastically alter your life for the better.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

– Evan Sanders, Founder AYKME Life Coaching

[contact-form]

Where The Light Pours Out

I changed.

But I didn’t add anything on. Rather, things fell away and I saw what was underneath.

I saw a world that I was supposed to step into. I saw the biggest adventure I have ever been asked to undertake and know that I am going to take it. It doesn’t come without some fear – I’m going somewhere I don’t know that well and there aren’t many people that I am familiar with – but I know that it’s the right thing to do.

Listening to the deepest callings can be complicated.

Yet, so simple.

It’s my mind that keeps turning and asking questions. But the other pieces of me know exactly what to do. They are all pointing me in a direction that I can no longer ignore.

Funny how the heart works.

One minute it feels like it’s in pieces…and yet if we ask the question “Am I being broken further open?” we get all sorts of answers that may surprise us.

This year has been a year of being broken open.

A year of breaking down walls, stepping into fears, stepping into dreams and really going after things that I had never been able to go after before.

Hands down, this year has changed me more than any other year of my life. When I started 2015, I don’t think I could have predicted that. What a wonderful surprise.

I’ve been challenged in so many ways it’s hard to name them. But what I’ve learned more than anything that sometimes letting things go add more to your life than anything else. That letting go process can be one of the most painful experiences out there because a lot inside of you doesn’t want to let it go. It wants to hold onto it forever. It wants to keep it locked up and safe.

But you have to let go.

You have to let those pieces of you go to see what is right in front of you.

If we don’t let go, we live in the past…and miss out on everything that is here. I’ve been there many times and it destroyed a lot of great things that were in my life. It tore me apart because after I realized what had happened…it was already too late.

That was the story of my life years ago.

A story that perpetuated itself until I cleaned everything up in my past. A story that changed me in many ways and granted me experiences that helped me make better decisions today.

So in many ways, I am incredibly thankful.

Sitting here in the quiet tonight, I continue to think about what’s ahead of me. It’s interesting to think about all that has happened this year and how I have been growing wings for all of this time. It’s interesting to think about the things that have happened and how they have prepared me for this moment.

These are moments to cherish.

Who knows if I’m going to name this properly, but there’s also a hint of sadness to these moments. It guess it’s a complicated thing in nature. There’s a touch of sadness in the surrounding of how many great moments I have had here. Smiles, laughs, moments of deep love and times of shaping my life into what it is now.

And yet, there are so many more memories to be created.

So many more laughs. So many more happy times. Many more moments of love.

If I can close this in a way that makes sense to me inside…I guess I would ask that I could keep those memories close and know that I can create many many more.

That who I am is more than enough.

And that I can light fires in hearts wherever I go.

-Evan Sanders

With A Smirk…

 

Safe makes you good, but chances…taking chances really makes you into something great.

I’ve seen that note on my cork board for months and months, through the passing of dreams, the coming and going of many things and the arrival of the callings I have come to answer.

And then I stare at those hawk feathers that were dropped on my path during the week before I finished writing a chapter of my life that lasted 15 years.

I’ve been growing wings.

Wings that were clipped years and years ago.

Clipped by circumstances and a punishing world.

But somehow almost 5 years ago I answered a call to start doing all of this and grew my wings back. I’ve done many things over the years but never quite flew on my own. I realize now, in hearing the night call out the next chapter of my life, exactly what I am supposed to do.

It’s scary to think about some of the things I am about to do.

But in sitting here tonight, it’s not really about that at all.

This is about taking chances.

Chances that are rooted in something far beyond your intellectual capabilities and reasoning. Tonight is about answering your heart’s calling.

Strangely enough, through the backend of this year, my heart has been requesting me to do all sorts of things. As confusing as some of these requests have been (and painful at times) I have not been led astray…but rather had more and more of my path revealed to me.

It’s not accident that I have spent most of my time lately tuning into what’s going on inside of me and tuning everything else out.

Distractions have been at a minimum and while it is difficult to sit with everything that is going on at times, I have stuck with it and answers have bubbled up from the surface.

Comfort zones are toxic.

If you’re not growing, if you’re not moving, if you’re not heading on the path you were designed to travel…

Stagnation will cause all sorts of problems for you.

This has shown itself to be true in my life time after time and I know that when I start feeling restless it isn’t because I’m not “moving” but because I’m not doing what I know is right for me.

It’s a personal gauge…

And sometimes that gauge manifests itself in all sorts of painful ways.

It was uncomfortable for me to step away from writing here and to put down the paper. I had many things to say but I somehow knew it wasn’t time to write any of it down. The things I wanted to write down weren’t finished thoughts and I struggled to allow them to find their completion.

Instead, I scribbled page after page of personal stories, letters, and memories down in my journal and saw all of the spaces fill up.

And yet…

I knew that these spaces…these memories…these things written down…inked for eternity…

Had to go.

I wrote my final piece…

Poured gasoline on that notebook…

And tossed a match and watched it burn to a crisp.

Thousands of words sent straight into the sky in a cloud of smoke.

As I watched those pages burn…something inside me lifted. Something inside me freed up.

A new beginning.

The ability to take a big risk and leave everything behind me…a little bit better than I found it.

And to do something for me…the answering of a heart’s desire.

To take care of myself.

To plant roots where I have always wanted to.

And to use the wings I’ve been building for years.

-Evan Sanders