Rosilind Jukic's Blog, page 83

The Average Mommy Badge

I think every mother struggles with guilt over the failure to measure up to her image of what a perfect mother should be (or to an image that possibly someone else feels she should be).
My failure took place after I came home from the hospital.
I was stressed and exhausted from my hospital stay.  I was very emotional because my baby was hungry.  I desperately wanted to nurse, but I didn't get my milk until 4 days after the c-section. Baby was hysterical from hunger, I was ringing the nurse every few minutes asking for advice and begging them to feed him - all the while so afraid I'd never have the chance to nurse my son.
But it came - and he was fed.
And if the story ended there, I probably wouldn't be writing this post...


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A Clean and Tidy Kitchen - 20 Days to an Organized Home + A Little R & R Wednesdays - a linky party #36

I actually enjoy walking into my living room now!!

I threw about 3 bags of stuff out. I even made my husband nervous, which says a lot since he usually likes throwing stuff out.

What I'm mostly excited about is our CDs. We had stopped even attempting to find something to listen to, because either the cases were broken (which made thumbing through them a core), or we had to wade through stuff we didn't enjoy any longer to find our favorites. I took our giant CD case and weeded out the unwanted ones, and then filled it with all our favorites....in order of genre.

So now that the living room is orderly and clean, I am ready to move on to my kitchen.


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We're So Fragile

There are no words in any language on earth that can describe the depth of what I feel for my sons.
This feeling only intensifies exponentially when they reach out their arms for me, give me sloppy toddler kisses, bring me a broken toy to fix (because apparently I am all-powerful and can fix anything), laugh hysterically at my silliness, lay their heads on my shoulders when they're tired, or come running to me when they've been hurt.
It is an immensely powerful feeling to know you are the very center of someone's universe.
We've been in their shoes.  Some of us have been shattered when that person, upon whom we assumed the sun ascended and descended, proved to have feet of clay.
Perhaps that person was a parent, an aunt or uncle, a grandparent...
maybe that 6th grader - when we were only in 2nd grade;
a senior when we were a puny soph;
our best friend with whom we shared our deepest darkest secrets,
and consequently we became intimately acquainted with a feeling called insecurity - the kissing cousin to inferiority  who are the offspring of rejection.
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved." Ephesians 1:1-6

If we would but fully grasp the meaning of being adopted and accepted by the Creator of the whole universe, space, galaxies, heavens...everything that exists that we can and cannot see, that realization would completely eradicate every feeling of inferiority, insecurity and rejection we've ever felt.  Because it would no longer matter that we do not measure up to someone's perception of what is acceptable, or that a person we admire has rejected us when Almighty God - the One who literally holds our next second in His very grasp - adopts, accepts, and loves us!"
While I never want to shatter my sons' admiration and trust in me, I know I am human.
I know there will be times that I will fail them, even offend them.  But, I sincerely hope that they will always know that I love them, accept them, and validate them.  I hope that no matter what happens in their lives, they will always know that they have our approval!
Because I never want to destroy that fragile trust.

Click HERE to find out how you can receive a copy of my book 14 Days of Agape for free and purchase Worship the Father and Discovering True Identity .

Discovering True Identity Giveaway Winner and Book Club Announcement

And the winner is.....

(drum roll please!)
Jennifer!!!
I have already sent you an email with your book.

But that's not all!
I am so excited to partner with my dad to present to you the first ever book club right here on A Little R & R!
On March 3rd, my dad launches his blog where he will provide us a free weekly study guide to take us through Discovering True Identity together.
I hope you will join us for an exciting time of leaving our past behind and recognizing who we are in Jesus Christ!!

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The Great Media Toss - 20 Days to an Organized Home + A Little R & R Wednesdays - a linky party

I already feel lighter. Well, almost. Our entry way is filling up with bags of toys, books, and clothes that need to be given to charity. Thankfully the garbage truck rolls by today, because our garbage can is quite full this week - and I expect it to be this whole month.

We are getting our home cleaned out and organized!So far the bedrooms are done! They are organized; stuff is sorted; closets weeded of unnecessary items, and they are our's is sparkly clean! The boy's room was for about 5 minutes. I think.
Today we move on to the next 5 days - Living Room
Day 5 - Any storage areas. Cabinets, drawers, baskets of odds and ends. Sort through them all. Anywhere that collects items to be stored. Likely these items haven't been looked at in a while. Evaluate whether you truly need them or not and toss what can be tossed.  I have done this already, but need to go back today and look at some items again. Often times, at first glance we rotate the familiar thought, "I need that for later". The problem is that we always think we need it for later but never actually use it or need it. The relief of being rid of it is actually indescribable! I have a few items like that.
Day 6 - Books, DVDs, CDs Cassettes, Vinals. We all have nostalgic media that we hang on to because it reminds us of good times in our youth. The question is, do we really listen to or watch these any longer? I have an entire set of CDs by a certain artist that I used to love. One song can transport me back to my early 20s, to days when I would rock out in my car at the top of my lungs. Only one problem. I don't necessarily enjoy these CDs any longer. My tastes have changed. Sure, I'll occasionally listen to a song or two - a couple times a year - for good old times. Which brings us to the beauty of YouTube, iTunes,Grooveshark, Spotify,  Amazon Instant Video, Kindle, Classics in PDF, _______ (insert favorite media site here). If you haven't listened to that CD, read that book, or watched that video for one year, take the plunge and toss it. If you suddenly have an urge to watch it or listen to it again, you'll surely be able to find it streaming somewhere on line.
Day 7 -Office. Go through your files. Organize file and toss loose papers, take all your "sticky notes" and transcribe them into a "to do" notebook to keep handy. Throw out old pens, pencils, broken staplers, empty tape dispensers, and other odds and ends that are laying around your work station. If you have an organizational binder, go through it and update it. Toss out what you wont use in 2014.
Day 8 - Computer. Take today and clean off your hard drive. First, back it up. Some great inexpensive programs are Mozy or Backburner. They only cost about $5 a month, which is well worth the peace of mind knowing that if your computer ever crashes, you haven't lost your files. Once you're computer is backed up, sort through files, pictures, and other media. Organize them, delete what you don't need, and back up what you wont use to a storage disk. Once you've done this, clean up your hard drive and defrag. Dust and wipe down your computer. Be sure to clean your fans well. Fans are a part of the computer that are often forgotten...until it overheats.
Day 9 -Surfaces. Surfaces are so dangerous! They collect stuff all the time! Take a moment and throw every item into a basket that either doesn't have a home or is sitting someplace where it doesn't belong and either find it a home or put it where it goes. Next, look at your nic-nacks. Do you really need them, like them; do they have sentimental value, are they out of season (ie. do you still have Christmas stuff laying around)? Toss or store what shouldn't be there!
Day 10 - Clean. Now that your living room is weeded out and organized, you can clean! Be sure to get the cobwebs, dust under the lamps and nic-nacks, and pay special attention to the corners. Take a moment and wipe down baseboards, doors and door knobs, too. They often get neglected.

Be sure to enter my giveaway! Discovering True Identity eBook!**********
 
 And now for the party!!!!
Here are the "rules"

1. Link up as many posts as you'd like (even giveaways!)
2. Link up old posts you wish would have received more attention!
3. Link back here by posting my button in your post or sidebar - or with a link
4. Visit the post just before yours

The party runs through next Tuesday evening!
So have FUN!

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Click HERE to find out how you can receive a copy of my book 14 Days of Agape for free and purchase Worship the Father and Discovering True Identity .

Child Shaming

I remember the first time I saw this. A father discovered that his daughter, using profanity, said something very mean about him on her Facebook account. He took her laptop and recorded a message to her Facebook friends, after which he took a gun and shot the computer.

It went viral.

And like many others, I thought to myself "Right on! That'll teacher her!"

Soon afterward, I would often see pictures appear in my feed depicting children being punished by being made to hold signs - sometimes on street corners - broadcasting the nature of their crime.

That is when it occurred to me that this kind of punishment (which should not be mistaken for discipline) doesn't teach them what I had originally thought it would.

Oh - it teaches them some things.

It teaches them what bitterness tastes like.

It teaches them that their actions are more important than the character from which their actions grow.

It teaches them to suppress the motivation behind their actions.


But is that truly what we want our children to learn?

Child shaming doesn't teach a child to evaluate why he steals, lies, cheats, uses profanity, skips school, or any of the other myriad of things that earned him a mean sign, a street corner and a viral picture on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

For a child to learn to evaluate the nature of his actions, his parents must have to want to engage in the process of teaching him, training him, and spending the time and energy necessary to enter his world if they will hope to understand that these actions are merely symptoms of a deeper problem.

It does your child no favors to resolve stealing if he still has a heart that is filled with envy. He will not learn to stop lying if never learns to deal with his pride. He will not learn to stop using profanity if he never learns to confront the root of his anger or rebellion.

This is true discipline. Discipline teaches and trains a child that it is what is in their heart that matters most. For if they are to be the spiritual and moral leaders of their generation, they must first have a heart full of God's Word and desire good character.

Oh yes, we can mold and modify behavior. But if proper behavior doesn't stem from a heart that is right with God, we have only raised puppets destined for hell!

Is this the picture of our Heavenly Father?

Does He shame us? Even when we willfully sin?

Does He make a spectacle and open shame of us?

Is not the purpose of true discipline to lovingly guide our children to repentance and a change of heart?

Does not the Word say that it is His kindness that leads us to repentance?

Are we not the first picture of God they have in their little lives? Is this not how they will relate to Him as adults?

But why have parents resorted to such extreme measures of punishment? Are they desperate? Do they feel they have exhausted every other form of punishment and see this as their last resort?

Perhaps.

But from my vantage point it simply appears that they are narcissists looking for a bunch of likes, shares, and comments applauding them for their "Extreme Punishment".

For why else would a loving parent heap shame upon their dear child, photograph it, and then plaster it all over the Internet where it is forever embedded to hound them for the rest of their days.

It grieves me that we are raising a generation of children who are being taught that the consequences given them from the ones who ought to love them most are nothing but shame and mockery.


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Be sure to enter my giveaway! Discovering True Identity eBook!
  
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I Live in Too Much-ville! 20 Days to an Organized Home + A Little R & R Wednesdays - a linky party # 34

I used to be so organized!

I seriously lament this admirable character trait of mine that has fallen by the wayside amidst birthing two active, crazy boys in the space of 22 months.

And if you've followed R & R for a while, you know how many times I have written about being organized, getting organized...and "Oh! I'm getting back to getting back to being organized....again!"

I finally just stopped writing about because it was seriously getting ridiculous. Not to mention redundant.


Another aspect to my organization frustration is the fact that this family of 4 lives in a 75 sq ft renovation project. Too much stuff quickly becomes mountainous piles of stuff that almost makes me feel as if I live in an episode of Hoarders. Okay - I exaggerate. A little.

This became all too clear whenfollowing a "de-stressor" tactic I came up with some time ago. I went over to my children's bookshelf to pick out a book to read and suddenly felt this sinking feeling of being overwhelmed with waaaaaay too many books. Now, I do consider this a good aspect of "too many" - being a book lover myself, I hope my children develop a love of reading. However, this bookshelf haphazardly (shall we say barely) holding mounds and mounds of books - some which have not managed to survive my 2nd born's tendency to love everything to death...literally -  is not in any danger of inspiring anyone to do anything but grab the whole blasted pile and pitch it out the window.

Honestly - this is not the best method of organizing one's home - but it is threatening to become MINE soon, if something is not done!

This wouldn't even be so bad if the frustration was limited to my kids' books, but alas it extends to their clothes (they seriously could never hope to wear all of the clothes they have) and toys; our books and CDs...among odds and ends that have sat so long, we simply don't see them any longer.


It's time to simplify, organize, weed out, and toss the too-much!

Each Wednesday for the remainder of January I will outline 5 ways I am decluttering an area of my house, so that by February our homes are weeded out, organized, and clean for the New Year!

Are you with me??

Here are the first 5 areas - Bedrooms

Day 1. Clothes - weed out clothes. If you don't wear it, if it's too small or big, or if it's worn out or stained - toss it!  I will be sharing some of my kids' clothes with friends. Seriously, there is no reason to have a dozen pairs of jeans or just as many dress shirts. I will be limiting their jeans and "church pants" to 3 pairs of each and 2 dress shirts - at the most. Enough for one laundry cycle.

Day 2. Clutter in the Closets. If it's not a clothing item, pile it on the bed. Once you have rid your closet of non-clothing items sort out the clutter. If you can't define it - toss it. If it's useful, find it a home. If it belongs to someone else, return it to them. Bedroom closets are for clothes, but mine have become catch-alls for things that don't have a regular home. That will change. This week. I am reclaiming my closets.  

Day 3. Shelves. Books, knic-nacs, and clutter. Evaluate the books. Do you need them? Do you want them? Would you read them again? If you answered "no", get rid of them. Keep knic-nacs to a bare minimum to make dusting easier and take all the clutter and pile it on the bed. Then repeat the steps in #2.

Day 4. Jewelry. Do you wear it? Is it a keepsake? If you answered "no", toss it! I seriously have earrings that date back to my teens. Time to toss!

Day 5. Kid's Toys. Is it broken or does it have missing pieces? Toss it. Do they play with it, or just throw it around the room? Toss what should be tossed, then, sort the toys by types: I have sorted my kids' toys by: cars, musical instruments, trains (because my kids have a major love affair with trains), stuffed animals (which will be seriously weeded down to like 2 or 3), legos and other  manipulative toys, educational toys (shaped blocks, etc), and "other". The "other" is what I will mostly deal with. Once you have sorted the toys, choose two or three options to have out and store th rest. After 1-2 months you can rotate the toys.




One more tip with the toys, before each birthday and Christmas, weed out their toys to make room for new ones.

Once you are done organizing the bedrooms, dust, vacuum, change linens and get all the cobwebs out. Don't forget to get under the beds and in the corners.

To make it more fun, take before and after pictures!


Be sure to enter my giveaway! Discovering True Identity eBook!**********
 
 And now for the party!!!!
Here are the "rules"

1. Link up as many posts as you'd like (even giveaways!)
2. Link up old posts you wish would have received more attention!
3. Link back here by posting my button in your post or sidebar - or with a link
4. Visit the post just before yours

The party runs through next Tuesday evening!
So have FUN!

Click here to receive a weekly reminder about this party!




 
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Click HERE to find out how you can receive a copy of my book 14 Days of Agape for free and purchase Worship the Father and Discovering True Identity .

#Enter to #Win Discovering True Identity!!

 

I know you all very familiar with my dad - who guest posts here really often.  Well, are you ready for this???
He's decided to start his own blog!Yep! It's true!!  
Fact is, I come by writing naturally. Both of my parents are excellent writers.  My dad has written a number of books:
His Freedom Series has two books so far (the third is being written right now)
Discovering True IdentityMission Agape
And he has a 3-volume Discipleship series that will soon be available in PDF.

Well, I am giving away a free copy of Discovering True Identity! Becaaaaauuuuse.....
To launch his blog in March, I will be doing a book study for this book!!!  
If you would like to read some reviews for Discovering True Identity you can visit the following pages:
My review

WholeHearted Home
Simply Helping Him

Reading List

Enter to win a free copy of Discovering True Identity and let's get ready to dive into this excellent book starting March 3rd!!
a Rafflecopter giveaway


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The Covenant of Christian Brotherhood

I was just wrapping up the plans for my Sunday School class when I wrote down the last sentence to the story of David and Jonathan. The words I was writing stood out on the page in bold letters:  



Jonathan protected David

As I sat there staring at those words, the question came to me: Do I protect those God has placed in my life - those with whom I am in Christian covenant?
I didn't have to ponder it long. Sadly, I knew the answer to that question. And heavy conviction washed over me in a tidal wave of sorrow.

When we received Christ and were baptized, we became part of the body of Christ worldwide, and entered into a covenant relationship with all who are part of that body.

Rather than protecting those we are in covenant with - as Jonathan protected David - we sometimes take on the role of Saul and seek to destroy them.

At one time I got very much caught up in this. I criticized ministries, pastors, and musicians. I spoke out against pastors of large churches who had a philosophy of ministry different than my own.  I condemned worship leaders who led differently than I would lead, and against Christians who held different standards than I.  I even attacked fellow missionaries - fellow workers in the ministry who have the same vision and calling that I do.

The more I criticized the more I found to criticize.

Accusing the brethren day and night.  

Shooting poisonous arrows filled with my own spiritual pride.

Annihilating their reputation.

I often did not know the whole story, only what I read in a Christian magazine (which is often tainted by the writer's opinion) or watched on YouTube.  How accurate is that?  I often quoted someone's quote without bothering to do my own homework to find out if the quote was in context or not - or what the speaker was actually trying to say.  Thus I formed an opinion and freely shared it with all who would listen.



I failed to keep my part of the covenant of Christian brotherhood.

It is easier to break this covenant than to keep it.  It is not easy to stop a slanderer or a gossip and tell them you cannot listen to their poisonous words.  It takes great courage to do so.  It is easier to entertain negative and critical thoughts than it is to reign them in and bring them under control.

And yet, this is part of Christian covenant.

Being our brother's keeper
Refusing to allow him to be destroyed.

Protecting him at all cost.

And when God was done speaking to my heart, I felt deeply convicted. I must do better at keeping covenant, at controlling my thoughts and tongue, at giving my brother-in-Christ the benefit of the doubt, at allowing him room to be different, minister differently, lead differently, and have different standards.

Because when we are in a covenant of Christian brotherhood and we protect and defend each other, we are truly being the body of Christ!

 
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#Enter to #Win a Gift Package for #Women

Marriage Motherhood and Missions is giving away the ultimate gift package for women!
Women Living Well by Courtney JosephLilla Rose Small Open Flower Jet Flexi ClipForgive Yourself by Leslie Monroe 14 Days of Agape * by, MwahLive Worship * by, Mwah"All I Need Today Is a Little Bit of Coffee and a Whole Lot of Jesus" embroidered dishtowel
To enter this giveaway, go here!




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