Lance Greenfield's Blog, page 56
November 4, 2016
Eight Tips For Sustainable Blogging
I’m going to take a wild guess and say that if you are reading this, you’re interested in blogging, not just today, but for the long haul. Maybe you’re thinking about starting a blog. Or maybe you already have one and are wondering, I started this site, now what? I’m pretty sure I can post this week, but what about next week, and the week after?
Alec Nevala-Lee publishes five hundred words per day, and has done so for more than five years. He shares his approach in this Discover interview with editor Cheri Lucas Rowlands.
We’ve got you covered. Here are eight ways long-term bloggers sustain their blogs not only through the first few weeks, but through the years.
1. Blog like nobody is watching.
Have you heard the expression “Dance like nobody’s watching”? It’s always been a favorite quote of mine, especially when I’m on a dance floor…
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November 2, 2016
The Writing Process for Creating a Novel In Less Than a Month
NaNoWriMo 2016 started yesterday. I was at a conference which included a dinner, so I only got a couple of hundred words written. The important point is that I registered more than a zero. I am going to have to work hard to catch up, but catch up I shall.
When I first took up the challenge in 2014, I took the advice of fellow NaNoers combined with Sheila’s advice in this article. I particularly like her second point, which I have passed on to many writers. Keep on writing until you reach the end of your novel. Never go back and edit the previous day’s work. If you do that, you will never finish.
Once you have completed your first draft, you can set it aside for a while then go back and review and revise, over and over, until you have your publishable novel.
NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) begins today for 2016 and I will be once again taking this challenge – completing the first draft of my new novel “Director’s Cut”. 
Here is an article I wrote when I was 3 weeks into the 2011 challenge, in order to write the first draft of my second novel “A Passionate Spirit”. Everything I said then still applies now; and my extra challenge is to take my own advice! I hope some of you who are setting out on this challenge today will find it a source of inspiration.
The task is: write a novel of at least 50,000 words in a month; and by the word “novel” we must mean, of course, “the first draft of a novel.” For I have not yet ever created a novel in a month; but in nine days time I will have done that very thing; and…
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October 30, 2016
Further to Revocation of Independence
In the light of the horrendous mess of the general election in the United States of America, I believe that this old article is more pertinent today than ever before.
Only God and Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II can now save USA from a fate worse than death.
On my post, Revocation of Independence, ralphfisher, rightly so, chided me for not adding a proper source.
Therefore, I began to investigate.
Many people believe that the original version of my post was written by Monty Python’s John Cleese. At first, I believed it so. Now is a different story and I have no idea who really wrote the original verson of the post. Was it really Alan Baxter of Rochester, U.K., or was it someone else?
According to Snope.com, among other sites, it wasn’t John Marwood Cleese. This is what they posted 26 August 2013 (Enjoy):
Origins: Just as most any anonymous piece of cynically humorous satire about American politics and culture ends up eventually being attributed to comedian George Carlin, so the same kind of material gets credited to English comic John Cleese when it evinces a British viewpoint on American affairs. Unlike his fellow…
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NaNoWriMo – Is it for you? — Englang Books
Originally posted by Geoff Parkes at on his blog: Englang Books
Lance:
I have participated in 2014 and 2015. With less than two days to go, I am still undecided about this year.
In my first year, I pushed out 65,000 words in the month of November, and wrote a further five thousand or so to complete my debut novel, Eleven Miles.
In my second year, I set out with the fifty thousand word target in my sights and with a good plan. After only ten days, I realised that the story would be diluted far too much by forcing it to be too long. In the end, I published Knitting Can Walk! at around only 40,000 words. You might call it a novella. I just call it exactly the right length, and my readers seem to agree.
NaNoWriMo is a great community and it has certainly fuelled my motivation.
See! I have almost persuaded myself to participate in 2016 already!
It’s the last week in October, and many writers’ thoughts are inevitably turning to the annual novel-writing event, NaNoWriMo. What started as a modest venture in San Francisco Bay in 1999 with 21 participants has grown into a global phenomenon with millions participating. As a first-timer in 2015, I’d like to offer my views to…
via NaNoWriMo – Is it for you? — Englang Books
October 25, 2016
Research in Southwark for Setting for New Novel
Last Saturday I was in Southwark, London SE1, researching locations for my new novel.
To me, the setting for a novel must have a strong emotional connection. My first two novels were set in the Cotswolds, near where I now live. My next novels will be set in London, near where I was born and brought up.
What a fascinating part of London Southwark is, rich in layers of history, the medieval squashed in with the 21st century, sparkling new towers, majestic cathedral, paupers graveyard and bustling market and Dickensian street names and eccentric pubs all crammed in together – and one of London’s most colourful and stimulating walks, along Bankside, from More London right through to the London Eye…..
But what I’m interested in isn’t just the tourist sites; it’s the atmosphere, the pubs, the unexpected small parks and gardens, the odd corners and…
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Review: Bloodsucking Fiends
Bloodsucking Fiends by Christopher Moore
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Christopher Moore has an amazing imagination. As I read Bloodsucking Fiends and, a while back, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal, I kept asking myself, “Where do all his ideas come from?”
This story is both creative and funny. It is different to any other vampire story that you have read, or will ever read, unless somebody plagiarises Moore.
Tommy is the leader of a gang of oddball supermarket shelf-stackers. Jody is a novice vampire. The two of them form what one would normally consider to be an unlikely alliance. But, once I have told you that every event and character in this book is unlikely, you will reconsider.
Tommy and Jody set out on a mission to survive. Murders happen around them throughout their journey. A centuries-old vampire provides elements of tension and extreme danger. The San Francisco police. particarly two contrasting detectives, bungle their way into and through the adventure.
Each of the members of The Animals plays a part, and they are all great fun as well as, like most of the characters in this book, having their dark sides.
I can go no further without mentioning my favourite character in the whole book: The Emperor. This old man is the self-styled Emperor of San Francisco and Protector of Mexico. He is supported by “his men,” who turn out to be two dogs equipped to do battle against the “vicious, murdering fiend who has been stalking his City.” This guy is respected by everyone, and he becomes Tommy’s best friend and ally.
I can’t say too much more without spoiling it for you, except that you should watch out for the turtles.
Now you are asking yourself if I am crazy, but I kid you not. There are so many surprises in this book. Now that I have finished, I want to go back and read it all over again. It was that good!
The one negative comment that I would make, is that I don’t see this as a love story. The two main characters make use of each other, and they do declare their love for each other, but there is no romance. Perhaps that will come in the next book in the series, You Suck.
Sadly, my to-read shelf is groaning and beckoning me to pick up the next, fresh volume to relieve some of the weight that she carries.
You really MUST make space in your life for Bloodsucking Fiends. Highly recommended.
October 3, 2016
20 Questions with Eden Baylee
Today we sit down with author and blogger Eden Baylee. She is going to share a bit about her work, inspiration and a little about herself. I hope you enjoy this installment of 20 Questions. Q1) Whe…
Source: 20 Questions with Eden Baylee
September 30, 2016
Review: Midnight
My rating: 2 of 5 stars
The story started off very well. It was intriguing and captivating and showed much promise of more surprises and thrills to come. The characters were all building quite nicely. But then it started to lose its momentum, and I found myself, by half way through, just reading on because I had to find out where the story would take me.
Towards the end, the momentum picked up again, but then all of the threads of the storyline just snapped shut, one by one, and I was left in a bewildered daze.
I was particularly unhappy about the way that one of the leading characters suddenly was killed off in just a few short paragraphs. I have no argument with the reality of sudden death, but there was no continuation into what happened next, or the impact that the tragedy had upon the other characters who had surrounded her, and been part of her life, up until that point. She was just dead, and so was her part in the story.
The book was OK, and I wouldn’t like to distract you if you were just about to pick it up, but there are plenty of other books which I would choose to read before Midnight!
September 29, 2016
Review: Bridget Jones’s Baby
Rating: 4 stars out of a possible 5.
So many people had told me that this film is hilarious that I had to see it for myself. They were right! From the beginning to the end I was laughing out loud along with the rest of the audience.
My favourite parts of the film, the parts which made me laugh the most, were in the television studio where Bridget (Renée Zellweger) works as the producer of a news programme, feeding words into the ear of her anchor woman and best friend, Miranda (Sarah Solemani). To make matters worse, and funnier, they are overseen by the new, ultra-critical, young director of Hard News, Alice (Kate O’Flynn). These scenes are typically chaotic and brilliantly comedic.
The plot is well described in every article and review of this film, so I won’t bore you with more “Bridget the geriatric mother battles with guilt trip whilst wondering whether the father is Mark or Jack” narrative.
There were a couple of cheeky side-swipes at past events that maybe only the British audience would know about. The first was drawn from 2006, when the BBC mistakenly interviewed Guy Goma, who had come for a job interview, instead of Guy Kewney, who was due to appear on BBC News 24 to discuss Apple’s legal battle with record label, Apple Corps. Wrong Guy! The second was a reference to Margaret Thatcher’s “We are a grandmother” quote, when Bridget’s mother says almost exactly the same.
Incidentally, the film features probably the longest local election campaign ever: Bridget’s true blue mother campaigns throughout her daughter’s entire pregnancy term to secure three hundred and something votes.
An extra boost for me came near the end of the film, when I realised that the hospital where Bridget Jones’s Baby would be born was University College Hospital, London. That is exactly the same hospital where yours truly was born in December 1955!
I hugely recommend this film to everyone. It is a tonic which is guaranteed to make you feel happy.
A letter to men: Make me feel safe
Safe. Maybe it’s not a word that comes to mind immediately when you think of what you want in your intimate relationships. Maybe you just assume it’s already there. Maybe it seems obvious or too simple a concept.
Safe.
But what does that really mean? A short while ago, I wrote a blog about communication between men and women and why we often feel at war with each other when we really just want to connect. We want the same thing – a deep, emotional connection – but we have different ways of getting there. “For women to open our vulnerable soul to another, we need to feel secure. We need to know we can depend on our partner to not just be there, but to stay there.” In other words, women want to feel safe.
Feeling safe is different than feeling trust, though they are related. On the trusted plane, we might talk about my job, my kids, my rescue menagerie or the never-ending project I call a home. I might confide some relationship frustrations or share gossip with you. But you cross the line from trusted acquaintance or friend to an intimate in my ‘safe tribe’ when I know the darker sides of me are safe with you – the side that has serious doubts about my ability to parent, the side that still wonders what she wants to be when she grows up, the side that doesn’t find the idea of “growing up” particularly appealing anyway, the side that thinks we’re never too old to talk about sex, the side that thinks she too intense for anyone to really love, the side that cries during cat food commercials featuring really, really cute kittens… when I share the insane, inane and fearful sides of me, the sides that I think are ugly and weak, and I share them because I know that you’re going to listen and understand. And stay.
A safe tribe does not have to be a large tribe. But the safe tribe does have to:
Listen
Support
Reflect
Hold space
Share
Love
A safe tribe does not:
Judge
Criticize
Use phrases like, “Well, that’s what happens when…” or “I told you so…”‘
Change the subject
What does this mean in our intimate relationships with men? It means we are asking them to provide a safe place for us to fully explore our emotional side, and all the dark corners and brilliant fireworks that come with it. It means asking men to listen, to support and to focus on being present with us, not solving the problem. It means asking men to remind us, in their clear, loud voices, that despite our thunderclouds of emotions and lightening strikes of self doubt, they can accept and embrace our vulnerability and know that we are not weak for sharing it.
Because that’s our fear – you will see our watery eyes or shaking voices or sniffling noses or strident tones and stressed out arm waving as signs of weakness and an inability to cope. Funny thing is, regardless of the despair we may feel in that moment, we’re pretty sure we can cope. We made it this far. But we need the safety of your space to vent, release, process and share that side of ourselves so that we can clear it, release it, and then get back to our lives. And we go back knowing that you get us, you love us, you support us and you will help us, should we need it and ask for it.
It’s not easy. We’re not all comfortable with emotions. And if they’re running high and wild, it can be quite a ride to just be present during the journey. It can be hard to watch someone you love struggle with a problem and bite your tongue on all your great advice of how to solve it. Or, it can seem that the pathos are over an issue that to you, is no big deal. But it is. To her. So find out why. It can be tough to hold space for anger, for hurt, even for love. As she strugg
les with her gremlins of “I am not good enough” or “I am not lovable”, you may struggle too. So giving her space to work through it and not bringing your own gremlins into the conversation can be challenging. You may not feel terribly safe yourself, in those moments you are providing safety for her. But know that you are giving her something so much more powerful, so much more meaningful, than the back-chatter of her gremlins. And yours.
Funny, isn’t it: we’re so sure that if we show you our “weaker” side – that we have deep self-doubts about pitching a proposal to the executive team at work, that we’re insecure about the jiggle in our belly or that flappy skin that magically appeared under our arms, that we want to age gracefully and have no idea how, that some days we really do want to stay in a fluffy robe, eat bonbons and watch soap operas all day because we’ve just had enough – if we show you that, you will think we are silly and weak and you will leave us.
And yet… yet… should you show us that you have your own demons about looking unprepared at a board meeting, about your own no-longer-washboard abs, about your ability to “perform” in bed and really just wanting to watch college football for 48hrs straight and think about nothing, literally nothing… and yet… if you told us that, it would not occur to us to think of you as weak or silly or a waste of our time. We women have our own double-standards that we apply most harshly to ourselves.
Women want to feel safe but it benefits men, too. The beauty of feeling safe: open, vulnerable, and the full range of emotions that nature has provided us – all yours to experience and explore with us. The conversation is better. 
The sex is better. The ability to share is better. The connection to someone who “gets” you is better. And we are better – more present, more honest, more able to love – because of it. When a woman feels safe, she will give you her entire world. And trust that you will take good care of it.
So make me feel safe. Make every woman in your life feel safe. If you dare. And see what you get back.
Natalie Hahn is a principal at Dirty Girls Consulting, focused on helping men and women tackle the challenges of communication and life transitions. We explore breaking free of traditional standards, how we communicate between the sexes and redefine the “midlife crisis” to accomplish professional and personal goals, creating an authentic, fully loved life. Read more Dirty Girl Consulting blogs here.
communication, emotions, fear, intimacy, intimate relationships, journey, marriage, men, power, relationships, talking, trust, women
