Rebecca Joyce's Blog, page 6

Wednesday's Rants

Wednesdays Rant…
Hello folks. Whew, it was a busy last week. I sure hope everyone enjoyed the BDSM Special and learned a lot…if not, oh well…your loss! J Anyway, I guess you can tell I am a little SNARKY at the moment. Well, I have a damn good reason to be. So pull up a friggin chair, grab your damn coffee, cause this rant is gonna be a doozie!
It all went down like this…
I woke the other day feeling pretty damn good. Got me some NOOKEY from the hubby, the kids were behaving (well…about as good as 2 teenage boys & and 11yr old girl can), anyway, I was feeling refreshed, limber and a little frisky! I had just grabbed my first cup of coffee and my phone rings. Now, technically, I do not speak to anyone before 9am, cause let’s face, I am a total MEGA-BITCH without two doses of JAVA in my system, but for some MORONIC reason, I say what the hell…I pity the asshole but okay, I’ll talk to ya!
BIG MISTAKE!!! You see, I cannot, I absolutely refuse to do PERKY in the morning! Well, that’s who called…Ms. PERKY(that's her name for now, it changes later!...Guess I should tell ya, I have known Ms. PERKY for a very long time) anyway, I groaned and managed a grunt or two to acknowledge I was still listening. Anyway, while she was talking a mile a minute, I silently drank my coffee and prayed for a Nuclear Guided Missile to slam into her house, because Ms. PERKY was going on and on about, trying her hand at publishing her own book. Thinking to myself, “Yeah, yeah, you have been saying that for years! Say something NEW or I am hanging up on your ass.”
Now, it takes a lot for me to set my coffee cup down and pay attention in the butt fuck early dawn hours, but the next thing to coming out of her mouth had my full, undivided attention. This is what the BITCH said, “Oh by the way, I am gonna fix the three chapters you sent me and finish the book myself.” The flames of hell billowed up, lightening struck all around me, and brimstone reigned down from the heavens. A mission quickly formed and all I needed was my gun! Too easy, I know right where it’s at. I quickly formulated how long it would take me to get to her house, cap her ass and get back before anyone knew I was gone.
The words mad, angry and furious were too tame for what I was feeling. After screaming into the phone, calling her everything I could think of and inventing some new words, my hubby (you remember him, the one who SWORE to take my side FOREVER) yeah, well…he took my phone and then proceed to tell me I needed to calm down. Uh, WRONG THING TO SAY BUCKO! Yeah, he flinched and actually backed away, my kids scattered like rats, even the cat and dog took cover, cause I was getting ready to blow!!!
Now in my perverted and grossly retributive mind, everything I thought to do was too good for this back-stabbing BITCH. Items like knives, rolling pins and even my gun were to tame for what I wanted to do. So thoughts of wood chippers, saw mills and steel mills began forming, but even those were too tame. Now, when the thought of 100pds of C-4, crab meat and bic lighter came to mind, I was starting to smile. I could already picture her demise.
Then reality hit…cause apparently the whole time I was plotting her death, my hubby had taken matters into his own hands. After he quickly hid my baby (my gun) he proceeded to make calls to some of his friends. Well, though my inner demons were left begging to fix the problem, after a lengthy visit to a LAW OFFICE, the matter has been taken care of. I legally FUCK HER UP! Muwahahaha…and people think the legal system is messed up! Well folks, let me tell you, IT WORKS!
Now, you are probably wondering what happened to the BITCH…well…you see, it went like this, I grabbed 15ft of rope and…
  Thanks for listening. Till next time, KEEP READING!!!  Rebecca Joyce

Tuesday's Teaser

Tuesday’s Teaser  Well folks, Welcome to another episode of Tuesday's Teasers. Today we have the elusive and intriguing Bella Juarez. Last Saturday, I tried to sit down with Bella and talk with her, but alas...she was unavailable. But thanks to the heroic men of the Black Ops Brotherhood, they took the time to talk to me about this amazing writer. Though the interview didn't go technically as planned, I am proud to say that today...BELLA IS HERE!

Hostile Home Front
BlackOps Brotherhood 2
By Bella Juarez
Hello and it’s nice to meet you.  I’m Bella Juarez, author of the BlackOps Brotherhood Series.  First, let me apologize to all you good people for Saturday’s post on Rebecca’s Blog.  I ran into a bit of a snafu last week and couldn’t make it. Let me assure you gentle readers nothing is stopping this post today.  Here I am to announce my new release Hostile Home Front, book two of the BlackOps Brotherhood Series.  This new installment of my series is due for release tomorrow on BookStrand.  In book one, Rapid Dominance, you met Special Agent Gavin Walsh.  In book two Gavin is front and center with his lovely heroine, the shy and curvaceous librarian, Dr. Amy Livingston.   Gavin finds himself tangled in a world of international intrigue that lands smack dab in the middle of small town Texas.  Not only is he faced with terrorist and gang bangers teaming up, he’s fighting a secret war within himself – the battle of PTSD.  Amy’s calm façade hides a damaged past as well.  As Gavin and Amy find a special connection and start to heal each other, Gavin finds himself in a desperate situation when the terrorist he’s trying to bring down decide to use Amy for bait.  Failure is not an option for this former Navy SEAL as Gavin searches for a way to save the woman he’s fallen in love with.   
There are lots of twists and turns throughout the book as Gavin and Amy fight their way through impossible odds to find a happily ever after.  It’s my sincerest wish that you give the BlackOps Brotherhood a try. 
As insiders to Rebecca’s blog, here’s secret.  Book tSEAL Captain Jack “Rock” O’Malley plays a deadly computer game with a hidden enemy and finds an unlikely savior in a quiet system administrator Anna Santiago.  When Anna becomes a target Jack must find a way to keep her safe before the deadly hackers decide its GAME OVER.
Thanks again Rebecca for having me as a guest.  And thank you, readers for visiting the blog.                                       Well folks, there you have...the latest updates from The Black Ops Brotherhood! Till next time, KEEP READING!!! Rebecca Joyce  
 
http://www.bookstrand.com/rapid-dominance

Monday Morning News

Monday Morning News
Good Monday Morning from the Erotic world. With less than 15 days left till Christmas, don’t worry about running out and getting that last minute item, click on over to Siren Bookstrand, and give the gift of BOOKS! With so many to choose from, the possibilities are endless.
Here are some new releases from Siren that just might interest you:
 
Monday, Dec 10   Protecting Their Mate (Panther Cove 1)~ Melody Snow Monroe The Season of Snow and Snogging ~ Susan Laine Pack War ~ JC Holly Her Dangerous Desires (Nororious Nephilim 6) ~ Carolyn Rosewood   Tuesday, Dec 11   Cravinga Lion (Pride Valley 2) ~ Lynn Hagen Unchained Heart (Dragon’s Light 2) ~ Scarlet Day An Unbridled Lust ~ Brenda Williamson   Wednesday, Dec 12   Catriona’s Golden Angel (Prometheus in Chains 6) ~ Clair de Lune Hostile Home Front (Black Ops Brotherhood 2) ~ Bella Juarez Jamie’s Heart (Amazon Warriors 2) ~ Ellie Wilson A Christmas Moon ~ Sally Quilford   Thursday, Dec 13   Dallas (Wolfe Brothers 3) ~ Kaylee Feagans Undead Tango ~ Alex Martin Katarina’s Return (The ShadowDance Club 1) ~ Avery Gale   Friday, Dec 14   Master and Inquisitor (Master of Submission 4) ~ Jan Bowles The Sextet Presents… The Ghost and Ms. Montgomery (Legends) ~ Elizabeth Raines Steam-Driven Seduction (Steampunked Lust 3) ~ Corinne Davies   Saturday, Dec 15   A Cajun’s Christmas (A Rock Bottom Boy’s Christmas Story) ~ Jana Downs The Werewolf Affair (DeWitt’s Pack 14) ~ Marcy Jacks Bailey Morgan (Seven Brothers for McBride 1) ~ Anitra Lynn McLeod  
Also in the news…COMMING SOON!!! DECEMBER 20th, 2012... THE TEXAS REBEL~ The Amrstrong Brothers of Cedar Creek (BOOK 2).         Mark Garrett Armstrong, the Armstrong family’s playboy on the football field, loves the media. With too much partying, women, and booze, he strikes the wrong pose at every opportunity regardless of the circumstances. With his career on the line, Mark sets on a path of self-destruction, forgetting those he leaves in his wake.     Sarah Renee Mitchell, Grammy Award–winning recording artist, has lived her whole life in the spotlight. When the media and her personal life collide, her happiness is shattered. She flees, vowing never again to draw the media’s attention. Out of the paparazzi’s reach, Sarah finds peace once again, until an unexpected cowboy shows up, bringing chaos with him.     When two separate worlds intertwine, unforeseen circumstances thrust them both into the limelight neither wants. Will either of them allow their own insecurities and fears stop them from acquiring what they want the most, or will they give in to their hearts' desires? Till next time, KEEP READING!!!  Rebecca Joyce  

Saturday Signature Author

Welcome to Saturday Signature Author...I think?

Rebecca Joyce: 
Saturday Signature Author
Bella Juarez Note from Bella: This is completely tongue and cheek and meant to poke fun at my characters.
 Well I had Bella scheduled and ready to go as Saturday’s Signature Author.  When I didn’t get her information like before, I got a little concerned. Bella is very punctual about deadlines.  I emailed her and this is what I received back.  Interesting…
Ms. Joyce:
Thank you for your interest in having Ms. Juarez as guest on your blog.  At this time, Ms. Juarez is unable to grant interviews or do appearances of any kind.  Please refer all requests to me, Special Agent Gavin Walsh, see enclosed for my e-mail.  Please format the interview in a question and answer format and we will gladly accommodate you under the Freedom of Information Act (FOIA).  Thank you again for your cooperation. 
Sincerely,
Gavin Walsh
TRAST Regional Task Force Supervisor
Special Agent, Federal Bureau of Investigation
 Say what?  I thought to myself.  At first I was going to let this go because I really didn’t need to screw around.  I found myself in a jam.  I couldn’t get anyone for Bella’s spot because of the holidays.  My curiosity got the best of me so I said to myself, what the hell?  I decided to write back with some questions to see what they would say.   Life with Bella must be interesting now-a-days because here’s what I got back…

Dear Ms. Joyce,
 Ms. Juarez is currently unavailable for interviews.  However we understand a cancellation would be inconvenient for you.  I’ve forwarded your list of questions to my Command Master Chief and he will be answering for Ms. Juarez until she’s becomes available again.  If you have any questions feel free to contact my office, see enclosed for email and my office phone number.
 Sincerely,
 J.T. O’Malley                                                                                                      1 Attachment:
Captain, USN                                                                                                   Interview Questions
Commander, Navy Special Warfare Group Five                                      w/ Official Responses
Q: What is your writing day like?
 Do people seriously want to know this shit?  Can’t we think of something interesting to ask?  Bella’s writing days are numbered if she keeps screwing around with national secrets like she’s the Gossip Girl.  If this doesn’t stop, I’m going to fuck up her planet!  But if you really want to know, she schedules her writing for about four to six hours a day. 
Q: What's the hardest thing about writing a novel?
For Bella? Hacking government computers to find out what the hell is going on inside our group.  I’m still wondering how in J. Edger Hoover she’s gotten into some of our bedrooms to find out what kind of private playtime we’ve been engaging in.  Now that’s a fucking trick! I know Badass sure wants the answer to that question.  
Q: What is the one writing item you cannot live without?
For Bella? Her life.  I’m sick of this shit.  People are getting really nervous about the spew coming from her keyboard.  Next thing we know she’ll be writing the admiral’s story.  You people don’t know warfare until he gets involved – he’s an underhanded prick!  Just saying…
Q: What is the one element you always try to incorporate into your books?
 Tell me and we’ll both know. That answer would sure as hell save a lot of time and pain for Bella.    I guess she would call it suspense and intrigue.  I call it, fucking up people’s lives and endangering national security. 
Q: What inspired you to write your first book?
That’s the million dollar question isn’t, skippy?  If we knew how Bella’s twisted, fucked up mind worked, we’d have it dicked and wouldn’t have a problem right now would we?  We should have her body donated to science after this is over and figure out what the hell is wrong with her brain.  But for niceties sake, let me say this – in her dedications she thanks the US military for inspiring her stories.

Q: Do you have a favorite character?
It’s as obvious as the Rocky Mountains isn’t it?  That would be me, Master Chief.   What’s not to love?  She’s just being charitable telling other stories from these no good cocksuckers.  Rock thinks she’s in love with him but I think he’s full of shit!  I know deep down inside she really loves me.
I’m on the left, Rock’s bringing up the rear (as usual)
Q: What do you do when you aren't writing? 
Well I don’t write and Bella’s not available to answer right now.  She’s busy with Badass—again.  But I like to read, do some dancing and just be a fun loving guy in general.  Bella runs some kind of computer company and runs marathons.  This is turning into a fucking marathon right now. Do you know how many of these she gets in a day?   I guess running a computer company is where she acquired all those hacking skills which have landed her ass in hot water right now. 
Q: Are you a pantster or plotter? 
For the love of Saint Peter, when’s this going to end!  What the hell is this?  And, what the hell is a panster?  That sounds painful or embarrassing.  Bella’s obviously a devious little plotter whose days are numbered.    She’d better come up with a plot to get her ass out of all the shit she’s in right now.


Q: What do you find the sexiest thing about a man?   
A man!  Who the hell do you think has been talking here?  These ugly assholes around here are enough to make a hyena gag so I try not to look at them too close.  I’ll tell you about what I like in a woman.  I want ‘em curvy and classy.  I love me a nice lady who’s a wild thing when we close the bedroom door!  I also like a perfect set of toes…
 
MASTER CHIEF OUT!
************************       *************************   ***********************
 That was the end of that!  No one sent me any information about Bella’s books, but I found out her website was still up and so was her blog.  If you’re looking for Bella, here’s the latest information on her books and other happenings: 

 Available at BookStrandhttp://www.bookstrand.com/bella-juarez Special Agent Gavin “Bad Ass” Walsh of the FBI is sent to South Texas to investigate terrorist activities. While out on a disturbance call, Gavin encounters a mysterious seductress. Compelled to attend a local social function, Gavin is introduced to the woman who has become his growing obsession: Dr. Amy Livingston.  As they fall in love, they deal with challenges from their damaged pasts. After twenty four years as a SEAL, Gavin is haunted by demons of war.  Amy carries on the quiet life of a Librarian but the facade hides a damaged soul. As the pieces of a dangerous plot come together, Gavin must survive terrorist, dirty cops, and gang bangers all taking aim at him.  Gavin walks a razor thin line when terrorist decide to use Amy as bait.  As Amy’s life hangs in the balance, Gavin realizes that failure is not an option to save the woman he loves.       Engineering student, Victoria Saenz, lands a dream job as a housekeeper while she attends graduate school.  Major Reese Thompson, USMC, is no ordinary master of the house. His hard body and strict military manner is male perfection. Reese is stuck in a loveless marriage with a hypochondriac wife.  He returns from Iraq to divorce papers left with his maid.   Victoria agrees to stay, to help him pick up the pieces, but Reese’s attraction to Victoria grows every day as the house seems to get smaller. The brunette beauty is there at every turn, tempting him. They discover a deep, sometimes dark, love for one another, as danger looms. The terrorist cell Reese has worked tirelessly to take down has a secret weapon in their war against Reese. Will Reese's and Victoria's love withstand the storms of war, despite all the forces threating to tear them apart?  Available at BookStrand, Amazon, Barnes and Nobles http://www.bookstrand.com/bella-juarezhttp://www.amazon.com/Bella-Juarez/e/B00AAYDAJY/ref=ntt_athr_dp_pel_1 

*BDSM SPECIAL* Friday's Frank Talk

**** B.D.S.M. SPECIAL****
Friday’s Frank Talk
Welcome to a BDSM Special Edition of Friday’s Frank Talk. This whole week I have been delving deep into the elusive world of BDSM. So far I have introduced to you some wonderful writer’s and their works as they live their lives in the BDSM World. Today, these INTRIGUEING Authors have agreed to sit down with me in a very personal interview not only to discuss their works, but what it’s like living the lifestyle they write about.
This whole week has been very eye-opening for me. I have learned a great many things about BDSM that I never knew before, like how it all began to abuse of power. Through it all I have learned that not everything is as it seems and mainly it’s a LIFESTYLE CHOICE.
Please welcome, Master Reggie Alexander, Eeza Alexander and Slave Kasi!
Good Morning everyone and thank you for being here, typically I start right on in with the fun questions, but today, there are some questions that readers want to know before we get to the good stuff. I’ll start with them first.
 Master Reggie…Can you please introduce these two lovely ladies…
            Absolutely; I would love to, first is my lovely wife Eeza. She and I have been married for 28 years and were high school sweethearts. My other beautiful partner is my slave Kasi. She has been a part of our lives for the past six years.
If it’s alright with you Master Reggie, I would like to start with the Eeza…
1.      Good Morning Eeza. This whole week, I have been interviewing your husband and his submissive. Readers are curious about you. Are you a submissive too?
Ha ha, I would say politely NO! The whole power exchange thing is something I don’t have a lot of interest in but if I were, and yes Reggie wishes I were submissive, I would probably be a brat. To me a brat is someone who is submissive but strong willed and not as compliant as many submissives.
2.      What is your role in this trio?
I view my role in this trio as being a supportive wife and partner. I work hard with Reggie and Kasi in the chainmail business and am working to join them in the ranks of published authors. I am a bit slower at getting my WIP done but it is coming along.
3.      Do you participate in the D/s scene with your husband?
No, that is their thing but I do support their dynamic and encourage them to explore it.
4.      How well do you and Kasi get along? Are there any spats?
We get along pretty well. In the beginning it was awful, I thought we had all of the issues worked out before we had her join us but once it was real I found I had a lot of jealousy issues. Reggie was not as good at juggling the new dynamic then as he is now, but it was new and had a steep learning curve. Now kasi and I get along well and spend a lot of time together.
 As to spats, of course, if I said no I would be lying. We’re all just human and nothing is perfect all of the time. But we have learned how to work through the spats and not take them personally, everyone gets cranks sometimes but that doesn’t mean they don’t love you. This is essentially a threeway marriage, and you have to work through the difficulties to keep it healthy.
5.      Who does most of the cooking?
Kasi and I split it, she cooks the first half of the week and I cook the second half. She likes to prepare low carb meals and I like to prepare new twists on a gluten free diet. We recently had to start that for our daughters and the low carb and gluten free work pretty well together so it is a fun adventure.
6.      When in public, does your husband show affection to Kasi? If so, who does that make you feel?
Yes, he shows both of us affection in public. Every once in a while I do get a spark of jealousy and I have to reign it in and focus on the healthy relationship that we have.
7.      Most women today can barely handle one man, let alone another woman in a relationship. How do you do it?
Lots and Lots of patience, lol. When things are challenging I just focus on the benefits of the relationship and let go of the bad thoughts. I have learned a number of coping techniques, like taking bubble baths and reading so I have the  time to think before I say things that I don’t mean. It keeps me from hurting those I love with meaningless anger.
8.      Looking back over the years, are you happy with the decision you made to include Kasi into your home?
Yes! I am glad we brought her into our relationship. It has made my husband a happier person. Her addition has allowed us to accomplish many of the goals that we hadn’t managed before she joined us like starting a family business. There is never any loneliness either; there is always someone to share time with.
9.      Are you happy where your life has taken you?
Yes, I am very happy and looking forward to see where the future will lead us.
 Master Reggie, do I have permission to ask Kasi some questions? Yes, please do.

            Good Morning Kasi.
1.      This week, I had the opportunity to talk with you and you told me you were once married. How did your former marriage shape you to where you are today?
My ex-husband was the one who introduced me to BDSM. He had gotten involved online, but he wasn’t willing to go to any public BDSM places. We were both submissive, as well, so I got a good idea of what I did and didn’t want in a partner after that marriage ended and I began looking around.
2.      You wear a collar. Can you please tell me what that collar means to you?
My collar symbolizes my commitment to our relationship. It’s not unlike a wedding ring, although there are no legal implications. To me it simply means that I won’t leave the relationship without putting everything I have into making it work.
3.      In your very first public scene, can you describe how you were feeling?
Very exposed, very vulnerable, very nervous. It’s not easy to get used to being undressed in public—probably for just about anybody. Fortunately having been around the clubs and knowing that all body types, sizes and ages are appreciated and nobody was going to judge me for not being perfect helped a lot. Once you get past that fear, the play aspect is actually much easier to get used to.
4.      A reader wants to know…Are you a good sub or a naughty sub?
Of course I TRY to be good. J I do take my role very seriously, since I chose it. My goal is to use our M/s relationship to help me develop into the best person I can be. But then, no one can be good 100% of the time, can they? I admit I have things I like to tease Sir about, but he usually takes it pretty well.
5.      Where do you sleep?
We all sleep in the same bed.
6.      Research shows that most submissives tend to be quiet, very organized, and eager to help but yet shy away from attention and praise. Is that true?
In my experience, most submissives are that way, although usually the ones who are ultra-organized and efficient tend to think of themselves as slaves, since it has a more serious sound. We tend to gravitate toward situations that allow us to be subordinate but useful. Usually submissives prefer to have their Dominants take the lead in public situations (not always, of course) and just get our validation later.
7.      How often to you kneel before your Master?
Every morning, unless one of us (usually him) has to leave before the other gets up. Then before a play scene or if we need a moment to reconnect during a busy or stressful time.
8.      You have been with your Master for a while now, describe your Master in one word?
Multifarious


                    
Good Morning Master Reggie…
Good Morning Rebecca and thank you for having us this week. I would like to clear up one minor housekeeping detail if you don’t mind. I don’t go by Master Reggie (for anyone other than Kasi of course, but by Sir Reggie. It is a minor point but I have not been granted the honor of being presented with a Master’s cap by my or any community yet and so don’t presume to use the title Master. By using the title Sir, I can still show my identity as a dominant without expecting recognition for any particular level of expertise.
9.      What’s it like caring for two women?
It is like any other relationship, I have to be aware of their needs and wants and when appropriate, meet those needs and wants. It does require a great deal more work in the communication department and we all have to be willing to compromise to deal with whatever issues may have come up. I try very hard to make sure they each know that I love and appreciate each of them for who THEY are and work to blend the vision and abilities of all of us into a single unified goal. The main difference between what we have and traditional relationships is that I do have a little more variety since I have two women to love instead of just one. It is nice to know that when one of my partners is not really interested in some aspect of my life that I have a better than average chance that the other will, so I almost always have someone I love to share my interests. On the other side of the coin though for any guys considering this lifestyle, remember that with twice the fun comes twice the responsibility and three times the likelihood of ending up in the doghouse.
10.  How do you deal with the occasional female spats?
We are fortunate that we work hard to communicate every day. This helps minimize the problems but since we are all thinking, reasoning human beings it doesn’t take it out altogether. On those rare occasions when spats break out we try and sit down and discuss the problems in a mature and reasonable manner. What usually happens however is I get cranky, yell a little bit and then calm down and we all work through the issue in question. That is one of the benefits/hazards of these types of lifestyle dynamics’, you have to be willing to make your needs known and to recognize the needs of your partners then work toward a compromise that meets the needs of all. These discussions can be quite emotional but when the dust clears we have always been stronger for it in the end.
11.  Can you please explain subspace/headspace?
Great question, but one that will have a different answer from everyone you ask. In my experience it is different for sub space and top space. Sub space is an altered mental state induced by either intense physical stimulation (often due to endorphins) or by the submissive/slave being placed into those situations that stimulate their natural submissive tendencies. As they have been described to me it is a kind of dreamy, floating feeling and makes them feel loved, appreciated, cared for and protected.
 Top space, again in my experience, is experienced by the top/dominant/master when engaged with their partners. For me, it is an intensified feeling of connectivity with my partners and a wonderful exchange of energy between us. It comes when I am able to produce pleasure in my partners or really get into a good M/s experience.
12.  With so many writers out there, writing about the BDSM Community, and yet, most don't experience it...Are we writing the truth? Are we getting it right?
            In my opinion not as many of them do not get it right as I would like to see. They are often close and I do not believe they are intentionally putting out misinformation but without experiencing it and truly understanding the intent behind the lifestyles it is hard to correctly capture the feeling and emotions the mindset of the participants. I think many of them are getting a lot better at it, since it seems like more of them are willing to learn about the lifestyles and not just go for the stimulating or shocking images they can create. Besides many of the mistakes that are made would not be obvious to those who don't live it and so probably doesn't make much difference.              I think that many of the authors who don't live the lifestyles are getting much better at portraying it though. With the groups on FB and Fetlife they are able to research and speak with people and so are getting much, much better. Hopefully that doesn't make me sound like too big an ass.
13.  You live a polyamory life. What do you tell people who are curious about it?
When people ask me about what it means to live a polyamorous lifestyle I tell them it is either the greatest gift to a relationship or the worst curse. It is one of those things that is not for everyone because it takes a great deal of work and commitment as well as a willingness to communicate. When it works there is nothing better but when it doesn’t, it tends to come apart like an exploding bomb.
 What it means in a nutshell is that we believe we are capable of loving more than one person at a time. I have never understood how people can say that a person should limit how many people they love. Love is an infinite commodity, not a limited resource. No one expects me to love only one of my children or one of my parents, so why should I only be able to love one partner?
 I heard a great metaphor for it once and apologize for butchering it but as I recall it went like this. If you have a candle flame, is it diminished by lighting a second candle? A third? A fourth? The answer is no, but you do now have a greater combined flame than any of them alone. Love is no different.
 With each additional person you add to a relationship however you increase the challenges exponentially. It is an amazing way to belong to something greater than yourself and the benefits out weight those challenges if you’re willing to work. The increase in resources to include physical goods, monetary strength, and increased emotional, mental and spiritual support are amazing and I just don’t understand how people can let petty jealousy ruin such a wonderful opportunity.
 Alright folks…Here are the questions you have been waiting for. Many authors and readers are very curious about just how factual our books are, and are they accurate. As an author of BDSM books, myself, I am also curious about some things…with that…let the questions begin!!!

 
1.      Whips, Chains, floggers or handcuffs? Yes! Oh I bet you wanted a more specific answer, didn’t you? Ok, then it depends on what we are doing. Chains, floggers and handcuffs are always a lot of fun for us. Eeza really likes the sound of a single tail snap and is learning how to use one safely and effectively but doesn’t have a play partner willing to let her use it yet. kasi loves to have floggers used on her and with our side business making chainmail jewelry how could we not love chains? (Lol)
2.      What is a typical warm up for a scene?
That would depend on the type of scene being done. If it is an impact scene then I start out with a combination of soft deer floggers and bare hand massage or thumping to get the blood flowing and the sub space started then work up to the harder blows and thuddier floggers.
If it is a scratching, rope bondage, fire/wax scene or play piercing then the warm up is more about generating the feelings that allow kasi to drop into sub space. We have our rituals that help with that and making sure our connection is strong before playing.
3.      When spanking your sub, how do you keep her focused?
We don’t do a lot of spanking since kasi prefers thud over sting. But when we do things like that taking the time to periodically run my hands through her hair and giving it a good pull helps a lot. Cupping her face, looking into her eyes and reminding her that she is mine help keep us both focused.
4.      Any special tools of the trade, your sub prefers?
Of course, lol. We really enjoy a number of forms of play depending on our mood. Anything pointy or scratchy is automatically a favorite toy for kasi, but she loves the feel of rope against her skin and the endorphin rush associated with play piercing. She is also a big fan of impact play that deals more with thuddy sensations than stingy ones.
Now Eeza does not bottom for me but she does like to explore her own top side when the opportunity arises by playing with crops and canes. She loves to see the texture and feel of skin after using those toys.
5.      Do you deny your sub orgasms?
Yes and no—how is that for an answer? I do require her to seek and gain permission from me before orgasming and I like to play with denying her that permission for a short time while we play. But to me the there is nothing more beautiful than a woman in the throes of a full blown orgasm. So, if anything I probably force more of them on her than she might wish but that is one of the perks of the job.
6.      How long did it take you to train your sub to your specific needs?
I don’t think there is any person, sub or Master, that is ever done being trained to meet the needs of their partner. We as people, regardless of which side of the dynamic, are constantly changing and evolving so our likes and needs change and evolve.
7.      How often does Eeza join in? Or do you satisfy her first then move on to your sub?
One of the compromises I had to make to keep both ladies happy was to ensure that they each had their own alone time with me. So, while we three spend much of our time together, I make sure that on Monday and Wednesday night Eeza gets an hour or two of uninterrupted attention from me and kasi gets the same on Tuesday and Thursday night. We travel a lot and so Friday, Saturday and Sundays are designated as threesome time to accommodate events, travel or my own selfish need for having both ladies at the same time.
8.      What’s the longest BDSM Scene you performed?
I would say probably an hour to an hour and a half. A lot of times the rope bondage and play piercing scenes take longer than the simple flogging or impact scenes. Some of the fire and wax play or body art scenes we have done have taken a while as well but I don’t often time them so it is tough to say.
9.      Can you make your sub orgasm with just one look?
Don’t I wish! Man, I would be the stud then, wouldn’t I? lol I have heard of subs who could allegedly orgasm on command or at a look but have not witnessed it for myself….yet! We do experiment with erotic hypnotism so I haven’t ruled out the possibility but am not holding my breath either.
10.  Music to heighten the mood? If so…what kind?
Absolutely!!! Something with a good beat or a personal favorite can really intensify a scene.
11.  How does it really feel to have your clit slapped, spanked, whipped or whatever!
(Kasi) We don’t do a lot of heavy play of that type. There have been light slaps and bites, which are very nice, but nothing as extreme as whipping.
12.  Is being tied up really comfortable?
(Kasi) Usually. It kind of depends on your mood, your mindset and what you’re hoping to accomplish. Suspensions are not at all comfortable, at least until you get used to it. They’re actually quite painful the first few times. I’m only just starting to develop a tolerance for it. But I do like being tied up in a nice harness or rope dress. For some reason just having a little rope on me actually raises my body temperature by ten degrees or so. It also makes me feel very secure.
13.  What’s it like to see your sub all bound and orgasming?
As is mentioned before, nothing is more beautiful to me than seeing my partners experiencing a full blast, mind blowing orgasm. Add the fact that she is bound and I know that I bound her for both of our pleasure just makes it that much better. Knowing that I have aided in her pleasure is the biggest turn on of all.
14.  How long can you really last?
This is a bit vague and can be taken a lot of different ways. I will choose to take it as how long can our relationship last. To answer that, who knows? I have hopes that it will last forever but just as with any relationship regardless of the dynamic it can end at any time, life is fleeting but I intend to make the most of it for as long as possible.
15.  For a Dom, which do you prefer, the stimulation and gratification of the submission, or the act of sex yourself?
I’m no dummy. I REALLY enjoy the act of sex—BUT nothing is more important to me and therefore more enjoyable than pleasing my partners. I get a real kick out of stimulating and gratifying my partners over and over and over again. Then after they have caught their breath doing it all over again.
16.  Do Eeza and Kasi play…in bed?
There was some experimentation in the beginning but no, not nearly as often as I would like. I love seeing two (or more) beautiful women enjoying one another and the thrill of being able to share pleasuring someone is one of the greatest gifts the ladies can ever give me. I just love to have one of them in the middle while the other and I share making her squirm, such fun.
17.  Finally…last question…I always as my Authors this one question. In your books, is there one particular scene that was inspired you? If so, which one!!!
We would say that many of the scenes have portions of them that we have done. They are embellished of course because we just aren’t that daring in person, lol. Reggie writes a lot of the sex scenes and many of the keyholes scenes are inspired by his fantasies. The sex scenes in the Siren books
                            
              Questions from Readers & Authors…
1.    (From Author Tara Rose)- When a Dom is getting to know a sub, do they go out on dates, like any other couple getting to know one another? I'm assuming they talk about other things like most people do not only about negotiations and safe words and such.
I would say yes if it is for anything other than a onetime play date. BDSM is about the connection between the participants so it is important to get to know the person who you are asking to give you the gift of their submission. Without some connection how can there be the level of trust required for a Dom/sub relationship?
2.    (From Reader)- For Sir Reggie- what kind of discipline do you use on your slave when she misbehaves?
As boring as it sounds I almost never have to discipline kasi. She and I agreed in our contract that if the situation calls for it I can administer corporal punishment but in the six years we have been together I have only done so once and for the life of me I can’t remember the reason now. The majority of the time when I feel she has misbehaved it has stemmed from a miscommunication and as a responsible Master to her how can I punish her for something that is partially my fault? Most of our issues are resolved through discussion and not corporal punishment.
3.    (From Reader)- For Sir Reggie- How long did you train to become a Dom?
I spent the first year going to the club a couple of times a month and watching everything I could and bending the ear of anyone who would share their knowledge with me. I have read everything I can find on the subjects of BDSM, polyamory and power exchange and related topics. We attend approximately 20-25 events a year vending our chainmail with the majority of them being kink related. Each of those events has classes and we make sure to attend at least one lecture each per event. I have even taken a yearlong course on rope bondage (and I passed too) so I would be safe and proficient at it and suspension play. But I would say that I will never finish training to be a good dominant.
4.    (Email from Reader)- For Kasi- Does it hurt when your Master spanks you?
It depends. Most spankings are done for pleasure and not for discipline. When done as play, yes it hurts, but the endorphins that come after it make it definitely worthwhile. I am not a “pain slut,” or someone who can convert extreme pain into sexual pleasure, but I can appreciate the endorphins that come with moderate stimulation!
5.    (Tweet from Reader)- For Eeza- Does your husband control you?
Of course he tries. He has a very dominant personality and likes to be in charge, it just is the way he is. It doesn’t go as far as he would like though.
6.    (From Author Jennifer Denys)- Question about how the polyamory relationship works - I take it, it’s is a full way threesome? And secondly does jealously ever rear its head when you think the other two in the threesome are spending more time together and/or are there times you feel left out?
We do have what I consider to be a full three way relationship. We love one another and respect one another. The ladies are not as physical together as some threesomes might be but each one is particular to the people involved. As to jealousy, unfortunately we have battled that monster from time to time. It was more of a problem in the early days but we are each human and so susceptible to the temptation to blame others for our insecurities instead of looking inside of ourselves for the true root of the problem. When that happens we sit down and discuss the problem until the crying has stopped and the problem is addressed. I recently read two great lines from a Laurell K. Hamilton book called Bullet that I found particularly appropriate to this discussion and would like to share them with you now. First: “A house without love will fall.” What a great statement regardless of if you have a traditional nuclear family, a single parent home or an alternative household. The other was this: “When there is enough love, there is no need for jealousy.” To me that meant as long as your partners know you love, appreciate and value them then jealousy will be less of a problem.
7.    (From Author Jennifer Denys)- Are you exclusive only to yourselves or do you 'play' with others?
At this time we are sexually exclusive to the three of us. We are fluid bonded and do not have any immediate plans to add to the household but you never know what the future holds. As to play, we are mostly exclusive with each other but have done a very limited amount of teaching or helping others experiment with various forms of BDSM play such as rope work, flogging, scratching, violet wand and such.  So, not 100% exclusive but pretty close. In all fairness, though, it is not because any of us have forbidden the others from doing so. The opportunity just doesn’t present itself very often.
BDSM isn’t for everyone, just like not everyone likes strawberry ice-cream; it’s your preferences’ in life that shape who you are, what you are and what you like. Being different is good. Embrace it, live it and most importantly LOVE IT! 
Thank you for taking this journey with me. It has been my pleasure to take you into a new world. I hope you learned as much as I did.
Coming up tomorrow, I have an exclusive with Author Bella Juarez!Till next time…KEEP READING!!!Rebecca Joyce

*BDSM SPECIAL* Thursday's Title

*** BDSM SPECIAL***
In a world so mysterious and taboo, finding anyone who is part of the BDSM Lifestyle is hard enough, let alone finding someone willing to talk about it. Luckily I have had the opportunity to sit down and talk with a Master in the BDSM Scene. Living the lifestyle is different than just participating. For Master Reggie Alexander, it’s more than a passing fancy; it’s a commitment, not only to the submissive he has taken on but to himself.
 1.       What led to the lifestlye?
     That is kind of a funny story. My wife and I had been married for almost 20 years (we were high school sweethearts) when we decided that we had seen waaaaaaaay to many of our friends go through really messy divorces. I have always been interested in polyamory but she hadn’t been until that point when we were watching our best friend’s marriage melt down with thermo nuclear force. Anyway she told me one night that we should give my idea of finding a girlfriend to share a try so we spend many, many hours discussing the kind of woman we were interested in finding to join us.     Anyway, we were very particular at.  It took us about three years until we found someone to ask out, which was Kasi. We met at a Christmas party being thrown by the local poly group and we hit it off right away (our 6 year anniversary of being a triad in this Sunday, Dec 9th btw). We set up another date for the following Saturday at Kasi’s favorite restaurant and during dinner she brought out a book called Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns which is a primer on BDSM and asked if we would be interested in exploring it with her.
     We had toyed with the idea of exploring it earlier in our marriage but really hadn’t done much with it and it seemed like a good idea to try it now since we were already challenging traditional relationship dynamics anyway. So, a few weeks later we visited the local dungeon and the rest is as they say history. We were all hooked by the amazingly genuine and friendly people we met that night and have spent the next six years learning everything possible about the lifestyle dynamics of BDSM, polyamory and power exchange and I for one would never willingly go back to a vanilla relationship. I have fallen deeply enthralled with the intensity these dynamics afford and the amazing connection it promotes. That is probably more than you wanted but as you will see, I like to talk.

2. How did you know you were a dominant?

      That is an easy one, lol. I have always been the guy how somehow managed to be in charge of whatever group I was in. I like to think that it was the right thing to do and it usually worked out ok so I will think it was. Anyway, I am the kind of guy who likes to help those who look to me to be better than they were on their own. That could mean, helping them to reach their full potential or teaching them a new skill or just organizing what needs to be done and then delegating those tasks to whoever was best suited to the task. I have also always had a strong sense of personal responsibility and accountability which has allowed me to make the hard decisions and then accept the consequences for those decisions. All of those things are important traits to me in what a good dominant would be so that is how I identify. I won’t say that I am a good dominant because that would sound cocky but I hope I at least do ok.
3.      What traits did you look for in a submissive?
     To me, a good submissive is someone who is personally responsible, organized and competent. They understand who they are and what their place is in the world. But, most importantly I look for someone who wants to be a part of something bigger than themselves, Someone who can recognize that their skills and abilities will be appreciated and valued by me and are willing to join their vision with mine to accomplish more than either of us could alone. I am extremely luck in that even though my wife, Eeza, does not consider herself a submissive or a slave she is willing to work with Kasi and I to make our jewelry business (www.polyspleasures.com) a success and Kasi, who does identify as a slave has blessed me with a M/s relationship that has allowed us both the opportunity to achieve the lifelong goal we each had of becoming published authors. I couldn’t be more lucky than to have the two beautiful woman in life that I do.

4.      How do you stay in 'Dom Mode' 24/7?

     I would be a fool to say that I stay in Dom mode 24/7. I do the best I can but life intrudes on us all. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have the occasional bad day and who acts like an ass which is not a very Dom like behavior. I try to limit those and my success at that depends on who you ask, lol. But Kasi and I have a set of rituals that we try and do every morning that helps me stay in the right mindset to be in Dom mode most of the time. 5.      Have you ever publicly done a scene with your sub?

     The short answer is yes. For the first year and a bit we went to the local club several times a month but never played in public. We spent our time watching, talking with others more knowledgeable than ourselves, reading books and taking classes to learn as much as possible. We did use the time at the club to work on Kasi’s low self image (at the time, it is much better now) by requiring her to wear outfits to the club that I chose for her. They were more revealing than she preferred but over time allowed her to accept her body as beautiful and sexy and now I have a tough time keeping her clothed, lol.      As we grew in our confidence in our ability to play safely we started to play in public and now have played publicly at events all over the country. We even won a local contest last November called the MacGyver Dom competition. In that contest the Dom draws for a play station and is given a bag of miscellaneous goofy household items and they have 20 minutes to come up with a scene and then 30 minutes to do the scene. The crowd votes and the best scene wins. It was soooo cool to win, muhahahahahahaahah.6.      Did you require your sub to sign a contract?

     Absolutely! We researched contracts and then crafted one that spelled out how we would treat one another, what behaviors were appropriate for each of us, what was expected of each of us, how we would address one another, how we would handle disputes and number of other items. When we had it in a form acceptable to both of us we signed it and had a time limit of 6 months that it was valid. At the end of the 6 months we revisited it and modified it as life had taught us that it needed to be and then signed another 6 month contract. At the end of that contract we knew that this was a lifestyle we enjoyed and that we wanted to continue to explore it together so we fine tuned it once more time and signed it without a time limit. We don’t use it as much as we used to at this point but it is still the framework our relationship is built around and helps us stay focused.7.      Have you collared your sub? If so, how did you know she was the one for you?

     Yes, I am honored to have Kasi wear my collar. About 5 years ago I presented my collar to her and asked her to accept me as her Master full time and happily she agreed. I am lucky in the fact that we own and operate a handmade chainmail jewelry business as a family so I was able to make her collar myself. It passes as a necklace and so is appropriate in the vanilla world but we are well enough known around the country know that most in the kink world also recognize it as the symbol that it is meant to be. For those who don’t know, a submissives collar is often as important to them as a symbol of their relationship as a wedding ring is to someone in a traditional relationship. We have been able to accomplish so much personally, professionally and spiritually that I knew she was the right slave for me. I am fortunate to have an amazing slave in Kasi and a wonderful wife in Eeza and so have the best of both worlds.
8.      Are you any different than any other boyfriend, husband or lover out there?

     Of course I am, I am super Reggie, lol. But seriously I try not to judge myself against what other partners do and just try to do the best by my partners that I can. I make sure I always remember, birthdays, anniversaries, important dates and such and absolutely love to see my ladies happy. Just like many out there I like to spoil them when I can and to share the important parts of life with them.
 Thank you Rebecca so much for hosting us this week. We have loved every minute of it and look forward to chatting with you tomorrow. Anyone who wants to throw a question at us as well, we would love to answer them to. See you all soon. - Master Reggie Well folks, there you have it. From the mouth of the Master himself. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s, Friday Frank Talk, where I will finally have all three of them together, in an in depth conversation that will leave nothing to the imagination.
Till then, KEEP READING!!! Rebecca Joyce
Bio for Reggie Alexander
Reggie Alexander lives with his wife, Eeza and their girlfriend and partner Kasi in a polyamorus triad in the Denver Colorado area. He and Kasi have a 24/7 Master/slave relationship which they use to grow and improve both their personal and professional lives. They are active in the local BDSM community and love to educate other about the lifestyles they lead. They can often be found presenting at conferences around the country on the topics of BDSM, polyamory, power exchange and writing as well as selling their handmade chain mail jewelry and clothing through their family business, Poly’s Pleasures Chainmail. Reggie enjoys reading, writing and riding his Vulcan motorcycle when he can’t be on a sandy beach holding an umbrella drink.
 Myths & Interesting Facts:

Myth #5-  That kinky people enjoy shocking the vanilla people. Ok, there may be some truth to this for some members of the lifestyle but certainly not all. Many of us believe that the core principal of the BDSM lifestyle is consensual, negotiated activity. If we take our slave to the grocery store on a leash, yes we may get a small thrill out of the sheer naughtiness of the behavior, but we would be involving anyone who saw us in our scene. Those people may or may not be offended by what we are doing but that isn’t the point. The point is that they were never negotiated with and they never gave their consent to being brought into the scene by witnessing it. In my opinion, it is both rude to the people forced to witness our actions without consent and detrimental to our cause. There are a lot of us out there working very hard to, if not make our lifestyles accepted at least make them tolerable to the majority which is the first step on the long road to legitimize it.


Myth #6 –  That at every club there is a long line of submissives hoping to be picked to play with the hot Master. Response – As a Master I wish this were true, it would be like every penthouse letter, “I never thought it would happen to me…” which is true. I never thought it would happen to me because in my experience it doesn’t, that isn’t the way it works. I have been fortunate enough to have been able to attend clubs all across the country either at kink and leather events or by invitation. Never have I seen a line of submissives waiting for the Dom of the day to stroll in and start picking people to play with, it just doesn’t happen. Many of the people who go to clubs already have their play partners and the ones who do manage to find new play partners do so ,usually, only after extensive discussions and negotiations. Now the exception to this is when you have a recognized expert in some form of play, then you might, I repeat might, have several people who wish to experience whatever that Master is known for. It is a hot fantasy but just doesn’t usually happen in real life.
Interesting fact – The following information was taken from an article written by a current Shibari master known as Tatu (http://www.ds-arts.com/RopeArt/History.html) : I have studied shibari and am skilled but not a master of the art and thought it might be of interest to your readers since it is a common art form associated with BDSM.
Japanese rope bondage as an erotic art form, really is not that old. Many labor under the illusion that it goes back for centuries, but in reality is only a few decades old going back to only the late 1800's or early 1900's. Hojojutsu on the other hand was the Japanese martial art of using a rope (torinawa) to capture, restrain and transport suspects and criminals in Japan during the Middle Ages and Early Modern periods; practiced by the Torimono, but there was nothing sensuous about it. Because bondage was considered a shameful practice, the legal captor used no knots thus out of respect allowed the person arrested no shame. According to Dr. Richard Clever's translations of law enforcement manuals from the Edo Period in 1998, there were four rules of hojojutsu:
1. Not to allow the prisoner to slip his bonds.
2. Not to cause any physical or mental injury.
3. Not to allow others to see the techniques.
4. To make the result beautiful to look at.
Source: Dr Richard Cleaver's translation of Edo Period Law Enforcement documents. See: Hojojutsu by Dr Richard Cleaver
Interesting fact – Many of the toys used in various forms of play associated with BDSM are expensive and created by skilled craftsman using an amazing array of materials. Little known however is the fact that a trip to your local hardware store and the expenditure of a very small amount of money can result in a wide array of toys you can use if you’re willing to put your imagination to work and create your own pervertables. Did you know for example that you can make your own wartenberg wheel by taking a small paint roller and gluing thumbtacks to it, point side out. It costs pennies to make and provides hours of fun. A vampire glove can be made from a rabbit pelt and any small pointy fasteners you wish to poke through the pelt. If you have never used a vampire glove, do yourself and your partner a favor and try one the next time you give a massage. The number of toys is only limited by your imagination. I have even helped build a medieval rack for our leather family last year, it turned out really cool.

*BDSM SPECIAL* Wednesdays Rants

***B.D.S.M. SPECIAL***
 Thank you for joining me today for Wednesday’s Rants a BDSM Special. For years, BDSM has been linked to abuse. Physical and Mental abuse. Now, since my expose’ into the BDSM lifestyle, I have done extensive research into this to clarify this matter. While, “some” relationships teeter on abuse, from what I have researched, the majority of all BDSM Relationships’ are conducted out of respect and are consensual. The difference between BDSM and Abuse can be grey, but let me assure you, there is one clear defining trait that tips the balance … it’s called CONSENT.
Consent: (verb)1. To give permission- to give formal permission for something to happen. 2. Agree- to agree to do something. (noun)1. Permission for something- acceptance of or agreement to something proposed or desired by another. 2. Consensus- agreement on an opinion or course of action.
Signs of the differences between Probable Cause and Consensual BDSM:
 
1.       Signs of significant preparation. e.g.. Adult toys, music, bondage furniture, lubricants and safety supplies.
2.      Restraints. Abusers tend to restrain their victims with fear and intimidation, not safety clips and quick releases.
3.      We call 911 in a medical emergency, not when there are loud noises.
4.      The availability of mentors, reference materials and technical guides.
5.      SM rarely results in facial marks or marks that are received on the forearms (defensive marks).
6.      There is usually an even pattern of marks if it is SM, indicating the bottom held quite still during the stimulation.
7.      The marks are often quite well-defined when inflicted by a toy like cane or whip, whereas in abuse there are blotches of soft-tissue bruising, randomly distributed.
8.      The common areas for SM stimulation is on the buttocks, thighs, back, breasts, or the genitals. The fleshy parts of the body can be stimulated intensely and pleasurably.           

D/s or Abuse?

D/s is about the building of a trusting relationship between two consenting adult partners. Abuse is about the breach of trust between an authority figure and the person in their care. D/s is about the mutual respect demonstrated between two enlightened people. Abuse is about the lack of respect that one person demonstrates to another person. D/s is about a shared enjoyment of controlled erotic pain and/or humiliation for mutual pleasure. Abuse is about a form of out-of-control physical violence and/or personal or emotional degradation of the submissive. D/s is about loving each other completely and without reservation in an alternate way. Abuse is hurtful. It is also very damaging emotionally and spiritually to the submissive. D/s frees a submissive from the restraints of years of vanilla conditioning to explore a buried part of herself. Abuse binds a submissive to a lonely and solitary life of shame, fear and secrecy... imprisoning her very soul. D/s builds self-esteem as a person discovers and embraces their long hidden sexuality. Abuse shatters and destroys a person's self-esteem and leaves self-hatred in its place.
 Regardless of how you interpret this article, one thing is for sure. BDSM is a consensual undertaking. The giver and receiver agree on who, what, when, where and how often. If not, the scene does not take place. Another key component is that the receiver, has the POWER to STOP the scene at any given moment, an abuse victim does not.

So before you think you know everything about BDSM, take the time to research it more. Abuse is Abuse people! BDSM…is consensual.
To read more about this topic, I have listed a couple of websites below. Please take the time to read them.
Articles of Interest:
http://ezinearticles.com/?Bdsm-Or-Abuse?&id=274152
http://www.sirbamm.com/smvabuse.html
http://fetishexchange.org/abuse1.shtml
 That’s all today. Tomorrow I will be sitting down with Master Reggie Alexander and discussing his life as a writer/Master and what his role is in his dynamic relationship.

Till then, KEEP READING!!!
Rebecca Joyce

*BDSM SPECIAL* Tuesday's Teaser

**** B.D.S.M. SPECIAL**** Kasi Alexander    Welcome to Tuesday's Teaser. Today I am forgoing the teaser spot, to sit down with an AMAZING author and Slave, Kasi Alexander. Yes, folks, you read that correctly. Kasi is a BDSM SLAVE! She lives the lifestyle and has agreed to sit down with me to answer some personal questions on what it's like to live as a slave. So sit back and enjoy.     Kasi Alexander lives in the Denver area in a full-time polyamorous Master/Slave triad. She has a degree in English literature and linguistics and is passionate about the craft of writing as well as educating the public about the alternative lifestyles she lives. She worked in the nonprofit industry for many years until her last employer discovered that she was publishing books on polyamory and let her go. It was a blessing in disguise, as that opportunity has allowed her to concentrate on her writing full time for the past year. You can find Kasi’s books through Omnific Publishing (www.omnificpublishing.com).     Her Keyhole Series (with Reggie Alexander) consists of two novels (Becoming sage and Saving sunni) and two short stories (It’s Only Kinky the First Time and Learning the Ropes). The series chronicle the story of Master Rune and his slaves Sage and Sunni as they explore polyamory, BDSM and power exchange. Kasi is devoted to her Great Dane, her motorcycle, disc golf and chili pizza. When she’s not writing, you can often find her at conferences around the country presenting on a variety of topics as well as selling chainmail jewelry and clothing from her family’s business, Poly’s Pleasures Chainmail.  How did you find your Master?
I knew I wanted to be polyamorous, so I went on Poly Matchmaker to look for partners and met Reggie and his wife. We started dating and decided to check out the local BDSM community, which none of us had been involved with before. He and I were both very intrigued by the Master/slave dynamic, so we decided to give it a try. What led you to the lifestyle?
Interestingly, my ex-husband once admitted to me that he had been involved in a BDSM online chat room for about a year. (That’s not the reason he’s my ex, though.) I was intrigued and started reading about it. He wouldn’t actually go to a local club and try it out in person, and we were both submissive, so nothing happened until a few years later when I found myself single and exploring the idea of becoming polyamorous. What's it like being a slave?
Well, it’s usually either really great or really frustrating. It takes a lot of work and huge amounts of communication and negotiation. But it raises the intensity of your relationship so much that the connection, when it’s good, is better than just about anything else on earth. Do you live the lifestyle 24/7 or is it only during sex?
We try to maintain the structure of our relationship 24/7. Of course life and family commitments get in the way sometimes, and it’s not always possible to maintain a strong, conscious connection. But we have little rituals that we do to keep ourselves in M/s headspace as much as we can. What does your friends & family think of your choice to be a "slave"?
I consider it a fairly private matter. My family knows I’m polyamorous (although they choose to ignore it for the most part) but I don’t talk to them about BDSM. I was laid off from my last job for writing alternative romance so now most of my friends are either in the lifestyle as well or in the romance publishing world and so understand or at least accept it. Is the sex as good as we read?
It certainly can be! The enhanced connection you get from a power exchange relationship can do wonders for the intensity of the sex. And there are so many new ways to do foreplay! It doesn’t all have to be painful. There is actually more of an emphasis on pleasure than pain in BDSM! What do you love the most about being in a BDSM Relationship?
Two things: the structure and the connection. I love knowing my place and exactly what’s expected of me. It’s like having a job that you really enjoy. You get a huge sense of accomplishment, you know you’re valued and appreciated, you know you’re making a contribution to your partner’s life, and you’re forced to articulate what you want, which vastly increases your chances of getting it. And the connection you can get when you focus on each other to such a deep extent can be absolutely incredible. It’s a lot of work, but it’s all worthwhile when it’s done well. How much of your life reflects in your writings?
A surprising amount, actually. And sometimes it’s the stories that reflect in life instead. I was writing about Sir Rune losing his job (Saving sunni) when I lost mine. We often find that the things we’re working through in our relationship end up in our stories. Becoming sage actually chronicled very well the emotions and thought processes of entering into a polyamorous relationship, at least for me. (The events in the story were all fictional, of course, but the emotions were very real.) I think writing is best when it includes our own thoughts and questions about life. Then it makes the reader see their own life in a slightly different light, and that’s what makes books worth reading!You can purchase Kasi Alexander's Books here!  BUY HERE With a failed marriage behind her, Jill Marten was looking to start a new chapter in her life. She had no idea that running into her old friend, Jessie, would unlock a whole new world. When she accepts Jessie's invitation to a party, in order to "try something completely different," it awakens a need to discover her place in a new community. Jessie, also known as sunni, is a submissive slave who is in a loving relationship with her Master, Sir Rune. When Rune and sunni ask Jill to be a part of their family, Jill begins her journey into submission, bondage, and polyamory, even as she questions everything that she has been taught about love and relationships. She begins to face her own desires and fears as she struggles with feelings of jealousy, inadequacy, and self-worth. Once she opens the door to a life she never imagined, a peek through the keyhole is no longer enough, and she must learn what it means to become sage. Kasi Alexander's debut novel, Becoming sage, is the first installment in The Keyhole Series. An active member of the BDSM community, Kasi brings a true-to-life realism to her writing. This is not traditional erotica, but the series offers an intimate look into the lives of the men and women who live the BDSM lifestyle, in particular, the Master/slave dynamic.    BUY HERE  Compared to the rest of her poly family, Jessie Chambers-"sunni" to the local BDSM community-needs to grow up. While her serious sister slave, sage, struggles through college, their master, Sir Rune, insists that sunni needs a job. sunni finds a position at the local goth/kink store, The Fringe Element, and is immediately embraced by its quirky owner. Things start to get complicated when sunni's ex tracks her down, claiming he's found God wants to be together again, and a video of sunni and Sir Rune doing a dramatic scene at the Keyhole ends up on television. sunni must find a way to restore her relationships, keep her master from being deported, take over running the store, and stop everyone else from trying to "save sunni."  Well Folks...that's all for today!Till next time, KEEP READING!Rebecca Joyce

Monday Morning BDSM SPECIAL News

Welcome to Monday Morning News
****B.D.S.M. SPECIAL****
This week is packed full of intrigue, mystery and loads of sexual information in the BDSM Scene. For the entire week, I will be interviewing authors, who not only write about BDSM, but live the lifestyle. After some coaxing, these authors have agreed to allow me into their lives, for a no holds barred interview, that will post this Friday for Friday’s Frank Talk. So, stay tuned for this intriguing interview. I have started off the Expose’ in Sunday’s Spotlight. In the BDSM SPECIAL, I hosted Ms. Cassidy Browning. You can read her spot, by scrolling down on my blog.

Tuesday’s Teaser will be replaced with Slave & Author, Kasi Alexander and her life as a “Slave” in a BDSM Relationship. A wonderful writer, Mrs. Alexander will talk about her experiences in her BDSM relationship and how her life influences’ her books. Wednesday’s Rants will have a BDSM Theme…A special guest will be writing and ranting about the bad rep the BDSM Scene receives.

Thursday’s Title will be replaced with none other than, MASTER himself, Reggie Alexander. As the head of the family in a true Master/Slave relationship, Mr. Alexander will talk about what it’s like to be the head of such a dynamic relationship and his role in his family. An author himself, he will discuss what being a MASTER brings to his writings.

Friday’s Frank Talk, I am sitting down with this dynamic trio for a no holds barred conversation. So, stay tuned for an eye-opening and very interesting interview.This week's new EROTIC RELEASES from SIREN:Monday, Dec 03, 2012:Duel Desire by: JC SzotMaria Rediscovers Passion by: Robin GideonWere-Devil's Revenge by: Simone SinnaTouching Deuce by: Lynnette BernardTuesday, Dec 04, 2012Unchain My Heart by: Shawn BaileyAbby's Twin Mates by: Darlette ClarkeLove Beyond the Curve by: Kate PatrickThe Thirty-Day Gamble by: Jill BlairWednesday, Dec 05, 2012With Cherry on Top by: Lynn StarkWicked Little Thing by: Ria CandroDragon Magic by: Karly MaddisonDizzy's Story by: Lynn Ray LewisThursday, Dec 06, 2012Ferris Braden by Joyee FlynnUnder His Holster by: Zoey MarcelLone Wolf by: Tedi SinclairThe Pirates of Endurance by: Angelica AltFriday, Dec 07, 2012Something Sinful this Way Comes by: Karen MercuryCommando Cowboys find their Desire by: Paige CameronWolf Hunt by: Jane JamisonSaturday, Dec 08, 2012Kidnapped by the Werewolf Hunter by: Marcy JacksHunter's Moon by: Britt KenleyFinn and the Bounty Hunters by: Gale StanleyLeaving the Closet for Love: Darren's Story by: Diana Sheridan  Myths & Interesting BDSM FACTS:Myth #1: Submissives are weak or defective otherwise they wouldn't allow themselves to be in that kind of situation. Response- In our experience submissive tend to be the most organized, capable and strongest people in the lifestyle. Think of it this way, a submissive is giving their power to their dominant, right? So what good would it be for either party if the submissive had no power to give? It is a common understanding in the kink community that if you want something done, and done right have a submissive do it. Submissive tend to be very organized and interested in service that makes them wonderful people, not weak. Myth #2:BDSM equals abuse. Response - To someone outside of the lifestyle BDSM can easily be confused with abusive behavior. Both can involve someone hitting someone else. The difference begins in the fact that in abuse the striking is done out of anger and in an effort to demoralize, terrorize and control another through force and coercion. In the lifestyle it is all consensual and done for the benefit of all involved. Coercion is not a part of a healthy BDSM relationship and nothing is done without the consent and negotiation of all involved parties. The force used in BDSM is agreed to and directed to cause a positive outcome not a negative one. Interesting and Obscure fact #1. Modern BDSM originated with the gay military men returning from WWII. They were known as Gay Leatherman and began to fill the missing structure and comradely they had in the military that they no longer had in their civilian lives. In Old Guard Tradition, everyone entering the lifestyle began as a submissive and had to earn the right to wear their leathers. It is a lifestyle filled with tradition and history. Interesting fact #2: Many members of the lifestyle are involved in high stress professions such as police, firefighter, military, doctors, nurses and emergency personnel. They use the structure and skills of the lifestyle as a means of stress relief. Well folks, that's all for the Monday Morning News. Till next time, KEEP READING!!! Rebecca Joyce
       

*BDSM SPECIAL* Sunday's Spotlight

B.D.S.M.
Bondage/Discipline…Dominance/Submission…Sadism/Masochism
Regardless of how you define it, BDSM is all about the person administering it or receiving it. For this entire week, I am going to feature SPECIAL Authors who not only specialize in BDSM books but also live the lifestyle . It’s going to be interesting and very educational week. So…get out your notepads, open your minds and let me take you on a journey into a world of seduction, dominance, whips & chains!
            For this BlogSpot, I am featuring author Cassidy Browning.
Ms. Cassidy Browning is the combined personalities of Reggie Alexander and Kasi Alexander. Together they live full time with their partner Eeza, as a Trio in a Master/slave/slave relationship. Together, they all live and are active in the Denver area and have a very co-dependent Great Dane named Daisy and a masochistic cat named Rumble. They enjoy the entire writing process and the challenges team writing presents. They currently have two books in the BDSM Ménage Fantasies series with Siren Bookstrand Publishing with the third done and in their own personal editing process. The first two are Clifftop Fantasies, and The Masters of Falcon’s Fantasies. The third is tentatively titled, Double Dom Fantasies and should be off to Siren within the week. They all live and love the BDSM lifestyle they write about and are always happy to discuss BDSM with whoever will stand still long enough. BUY HERE       After a wonderful review in Exotic Travels Magazine, the BDSM bed-and-breakfast Clifftop Fantasies has been invaded by the charming but undisciplined rock star Daphne “Falcon” Monroe, there to film her newest video. She has brought her rowdy bandmates, her harassed and overworked manager Finn Scott, and her own appetite for chaos and trouble. Finn is determined to rein in her explosive nature, but he may not be able to accomplish it in time to keep her from ruining her career. Little does either of them know that they are on a collision course with the troubled and grieving pilot Decker Cunningham.
     Will her self-destructive tendencies be stoked by bad boy Blaze, or will she be tamed by the combined efforts of Finn and the quiet Dominant Decker? Add in an illicit affair with an up-and-coming politician, and an unsuspecting leather community, and you'll discover who becomes the Masters of Falcon's fantasies.

  BUY HERE        When Allie Walker inherits her father’s huge, beautiful house on the California coast, she knows it is the chance of a lifetime. Now she can start the bed-and-breakfast she’s always dreamed of—with the help of her boyfriend Brad McCarthy and the sexy, mysterious handyman Karl Masterson.
     But no sooner do they open for business when mistakes from Allie’s past come back to haunt her and she begins to suspect that her father had his own shocking secrets. Now Allie must reconcile herself with her past, deal with the photographer who seems to want to bring up things she’d rather not talk about, decide what to do about the sexy woman that is showing interest in Brad, and deal with the fact that her father was a leader in the local BDSM community. And then there is her growing attraction to Karl and the way of life he represents.


Well folks, that’s it for Cassidy Browning. Her books are available for purchase at Siren at http://www.bookstrand.com/cassidy-browning
Stay tuned for Tuesday’s Teaser for another special guest, Kasi Alexander as we delve deeper into the world of BDSM as we answer more questions into this mysterious world. Until next time Keep READING!!!  Rebecca Joyce  Myths & Facts of BDSM
Myth #1: Using safewords and safe signals during first and incidental contacts is a good idea.
Fact: In most BDSM-relationships they are considered to be rather silly and useless.Myth #2: Being a sub before your dom and testing out toys and gear on your own (dominants) body is a good safety measure.
Fact: Self inflicted impulses (like "feeling the whip" or testing nipple clamps on your hand or even nipples) are totally different from what somebody else does to you, especially if that happens in an entirely different context with emotions raging at a 100 Miles per hour and lots of other impulses. What you felt, when you tested the clamp in the shop, has NOTHING to do with what it feels like to the sub, when used in a scene.