Beth Morey's Blog, page 29

Awarded (Let's Have Some Fun, Okay?)

It's been very serious here on the blog lately.  Real and honest, yes, but still serious.  So here's a little fun: Jen and RaeAnne both gave me for a Liebster Award.  Thank you, sweet ladies!

Here's a little about the Liebster Award:

This blog award is granted to up and coming bloggers with fewer than 200 followers who deserve some recognition and support to keep on blogging. What is a Liebster?  Liebster is German and means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovel...

This is What I Know (And It's Not Much)

I have to admit - I haven't been writing much because I don't know what to say.

Because I am struggling.

Yes, with anxiety. Yes, with typical-if-unfortunate mama guilt, I'm-not-doing-this-good-enough guilt.

But above those mostly expected things arches something I did not expect: that I am struggling with God. With trusting him.

After Eve died, of course there were questions. Of course. But I brought them to God and I felt like he used my questions to draw me closer. And I learned to trust him a...

In the Art . . . Studio?

4 months old already?!
There's no question that a newborn brings all sorts of new chaos and messiness into his parents' lives.  Our sweet guy is no exception -- the mountain of unfolded laundry looms ever higher, the house needs a good dusting and scrubbing, and our kitchen table's surface hasn't seen the light of day in months. 
And I'm so glad.  So, so glad.  Because that laundry is unfolded because instead my son is folded into my arms.  The house isn't so clean beca...

When Fear Enters In: Motherhood After Loss

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."~ Joshua 1:9 
"Overhearing what they said, Jesus told him, 'Don’t be afraid; just believe.'"~ Mark 5:36
I thought that after I birthed our sweet rainbow boy safely into the world that the fear would leave.  Because although I thought I was dealing with it well at the time, distance and hindsight have shown me that Baby Boy's pregnancy w...

Soul Refreshment

It's been so interesting to me to see how my relationship with art and creativity is developing as a mother with a new(ish) baby.  Before Baby Boy arrived, I would create in fits and starts, held back by fear and perfectionism, with long "breaks" (a.k.a. avoidance) in between creating finished pieces.

But now, I have pretty much no time.  Our sweet boy is a rather high needs baby who resists naps like no other, meaning that I cannot depend on having any time to exercise, shower, crea...

Sometimes

Let me tell you a secret.
Sometimes I want to forget that I have a daughter that died.  Today I am writing over at Still Standing Magazine!   Click here to read the rest of this article.

One Thousand Gifts and Making Friends with Grief

 
It's strange to me how easily I forget the ways of grief and all that comes with it.  
I've been living in and with grief for over a year now.  January 20 was Eve's due date last year, and this year will mark fourteen months without her.  
Fourteen months.  You'd think I'd have learned by now.  But somehow grief still manages to surprise me with its unpredictability.
Because really, I thought I was doing okay.  Okay with the grief, and okay with the...

Books for Eve's Birthday: One Last Update

I had a slight forehead-slapping, what-was-I-thinking moment the other day when I realized -- I never did a final update on Eve's birthday books!  I guess that's sort of a happy thing, because it means that my hands have been full with life with our sweet rainbow boy, but still, I apologize.
As you may remember (it seems so long ago now!), I decided that I wanted to donate copies of the book When Hello Means Goodbye as a way of celebrating the first anniversary of Eve's birthday.  W...

The View From Here

There is so much running through my head and heart right now, so much that wants to overflow onto the page (er, screen).  But with so little time to write I find myself overwhelmed to wordlessness when I finally do have a moment to spill it all out.

What can I say to you, from right here and now?

I can say that I grow more and more in love with our rainbow son each day, even through frustration over sleepless nights and nap-less days, in love to the point of pain.  I did and did not k...

Being Bold for the Babylost: Not Forgotten Angel Baby Drawings

 
I've been bold this week.  Bold with my art, and with offering my heart.  At least, that's how it feels to me.

Here's what's happening:

Recently, a fellow blogger inspired me.  She* wrote a post describing how she imagined her baby who had died might have looked when she grew up, or might even look right now, in Heaven.  So later, when I sat down with my art journal, a little girl was born onto the page matching the blogger's description -- and next to her, a drawing...