Daniel Bailey's Blog, page 26

my dog has new crate bedding

with love for my dear friend mikhail

your putrid flower unfolds like the map of a gangsta-ass website
and now i am excited for the damage of your love
like an all-day mcdonald's breakfast

drown my baldness in your compound halo

it has been snowing for so long that i am of the snow now
i am like the whiteness of the world
i freak out over nothing

in the wastebasket a letter
on the back of an arby's wrapper:

"DEAR WHATNOTS,

I AM THE CRUST IN THE CORNER OF YOUR MOUTH
PLEASE REMOVE ME
PLEASE DRINK MORE WATER
GET HAPPY IF YOU ARE NOT

LOVE LOVE LOVE INSIDE THE FART OF A DOG"

and then mikhail says hello
and then mikhail says goodbye
and then mikhail in the crust of your eye

---

pyotr bastardov, 1966
trans. daniel bailey, 2012

i know not what your deal is

i am a fuggin lovely bastard
i have you mid-quake
fuggin give me your whole
fuggin cram a whole lotta your love into me

i am fuggin broken down inside this church
i am a dead monk laughing
vow of fuggin silence be damned

cuss into the fuggin butt of my worship
the petals of sacrament have been plucked

i remember you laughing
you are the number of times i have laughed

if i had a cell i would grow moss inside it
inside each of my holy cells a new fuggin moss explodes

what's great is you
what's never is complete
constantly i dream i am complete
of you

-- kristoff hungerbutt, 1823
trans. daniel bailey, 2012

hallelujah, giant space wolf trailer

thank you diana ross and the supremes.

youtube put an ad on it because "third party content." so basically they get to make money off shit that they don't own either. maybe i'll upload it to vimeo. i just wanted people to know that i'm not trying to make money off this or someone else's anything because that would be evil.

ok. here is the same video uploaded to vimeo in case it's decided that i am using the song unfairly, which i don't think i am.



bryan and i are trying to come up with ways to win a copy of the book that doesn't involve a battle to the death. ok. i love you. don't die until you die.

radio killed the blogging star

this sunday i was on the poetry show on krfc, which is a small radio station in fort collins. the show is hosted by dona stein and susie martinez.

i read poems on this show for close to an hour. i also did my best to answer a few questions about poetry.

i read some poems from hallelujah, giant space wolf as well as from a second manuscript that i am nearing completion on.

here is the show in its infinity for your lissnins in your itunes or whatever.

thank you to dona stein and susie martinez for having me on the show. it was lovely.

also, apparently danielle ate the sandwich is a band. i wasn't paying attention to the commercial, but i managed to hear that phrase and decided to repeat it throughout the show.

also, i read a mark leidner poem at the end of the reading because i didn't bring enough of my own poems.

i will beat up every last youth pastor in america

elizabeth and i are putting together a new chapbook and we're looking for submissions.

info here.

now go wild.

here is a poem what i read for the polestar white album r...

here is a poem what i read for the polestar white album reading in new york last week.



i am not done with this poem yet.
here is me reading the poem if you want to know what that looked like from a 3rd party perspective:



if you want to know what that reading looked like from my perspective just look at the scan of the poem again.

here are two pictures of the various peoples i got to hang out with:


and


when we weren't hanging out with friends we were basically acting like tourists. here's a picture of me in front of my childhood hero, the deinonychus:



i'm touching a plastic mold of the deinonychus' ripping claw.

here is elizabeth in front of a brontosaurus:



here is some info on my favorite painting from the moma:



we didn't meet beyonce's and jay-z's baby, but that's ok. that baby is probably a total dick.

HALLELUJAH, GIANT SPACE WOLF

my new book HALLELUJAH, GIANT SPACE WOLF can now be pre-ordered from mammoth editions. the official release will be in mid-march.

yes, the ides of march when julius caesar got blanked by brutus. also when yr face gets blanked by my book which is in the shape of my fist.



it is groundhog day. buy a copy for a groundhog. then eat the groundhog. take the book back. take literature back. take literature putt-putting. defeat literature at a game of putt-putt by a score of 1,000,000 to nothing. laugh at literature's puny score. kiss a dog on the mouth. kiss a baby on the mouth. wear a helmet to work and say that you're practicing for your audition for the part of natalie portman in a play about the making of garden state. eat a bomb. diffuse the bomb inside your stomach. shit the head of julius caesar. put a box of waffles in the freezer. be the cutest person alive for as long as you are alive and then let the uglies fight for your crown. put yourself in the hospital. grab a drink with former russian president vladimir putin. tell putin how much you love him. listen to a band called someone still loves you boris yeltsin. make fun of said band with your sister. kiss your sister on the mouth. get real physical. put yourself another hospital. eat the hell of the other patients. vomit the hell into the carpet. blab into a dictionary until it succumbs and decomposes. uafje jkljeopiqjed svl;kjwef vlvckq;jelj dclm;lkerj gamb.m l;kejr g.ase/gj lqwkej .jpoirq re.kjg lakjseoiqj rheblkjsdfjhlkqj3kjr l;fjb/.akj sl4;kjt l3kjre.abkljpoiaj ekl;jtr q;lk4j g.akdjb ;lkejr lkqjermblkmlw;kemrl;qj rglka blkjqrlejlqj4 gl;kjwerlkglerj gkl;q3j4[qpiur r'qj;ej;a''j'ql;kfdb,mnxcjhrljfga'/zgj sj/zj/zzkjz/z/jb kljgw[eripoj lakd gl;qjg;rlj a;lskj g;lakjs dgkrekjagl ;jrasdgkljgkl;asjdg ;lakejr g;lkajd flkjw eltfjsdjkglqke rj/lkjg aflkjb a;lrekj g/kajf g/kalj t/aklj t/alkj rgkljsip[gqu3 rgije berjg balkj bap[r1iu3[490t841-0348760-197340-681n3 4 324 601-34 60384 60139 46=193 86=139 46=3094 6=1309468 091 6019384 tiajgf ;klasj gpieru gpjahkl' qerpiu gejl laj[iduo gqieoj rg;ajsgkl;j eoiqrug lkdj pwqoirugoij glkjdg lakjsl;k fjawelkj alksjeflkjasld;kjfla;ksjd flakjsdlfkjwopiegu albm.xmdg[q0eriu blakjf blk;jalkfjgalk ;fjblk;a djblk;ja lkjfg ;lwkej[poij asdljk q[pojergajrl;kgjal;sk gl;kjr;lgkjaspgj ;lajrepq[oiug aslfkjb al;dkfjbel;krjgl;ka flgkj e;lkgjr a;fj la;ksjg aslk;djg alskjdgp3[i1][oit3q g'eq;rjkhgk;ldafjhlk;jalk;dfjh3-04ijgrpj fljklk;3j4 tlk34jklt;j 2l4;3kj5y -[2349iy y 2kl45jy lkj45ylk;jer hlkj45y;'jkqer=hip[dri h'erkh kjly lkewjrh l;4j5he rlk;hj kl;ejrh laje lkjqwel;kjl ;kgjfasdp[iouewr gpi p[oqerig ;asdkjg q;erjk glkajsdgl ;kja gp[qoje glkqj gl;kqejrglk;j asdlkg;j al;kgj al;ksjgo3[]qeigaSDGk/qwe;gl ka;sdgj lakjrg askljg /sakjg erkljg /askjhgkl jbzoiu[q[pavdj zxlkjb lksjfd blk;adfj bj afbl kaldjf gljerl glajks lbjapo[izk[pkqepr g;kaskglj akls;j g agj [epirgj s/aemrg/SKJDg lkjr [peio]q[q[[q[qj ;fldakj g;ldjkg ;lkjergjdf blakdfhal;ksjg q[peoraj ;lgdfj gp[3oiqreu9f0bi akglj alskdjg alksjdb asljgq0[pworea lk;asjg ;lkajs glkajsf ljbadfkl; 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DEATHMARCH

in the mid-late summer 2009 i and four good people got together at joe mchugh's house where we read poems into a laptop and made noise with hammers, breaking shit, etc.

here is the document of that noise: DEATHMARCH @ BAND CAMP



the album is there to listen to and/or download for free.

we originally released this as a cdr at the village green record store, where we also gave our one and only public performance/rampage.

this is the original release art:



go baptize your dog in the heat of the oven.

cover me in laundrayy

here is the cover for my forthcoming book from mammoth editions (there will be a website/preorders soon):



mammoth editions is bryan coffelt's child.
bryan is also the man responsible for this badass book cover.

more on this soon.