Jack Lewis Baillot's Blog, page 79

"I want you to know, this is the strangest thing I've ever done!"

 Thank you everyone, for your comments on my last post. Last night, after realizing I'd completely slaughtered chapter three, I was ready to give up all together. I probably sound like a whiner, but things like this are a struggle for me. I've studied grammar at least five times, the same things over and over, and I can never understand it. And last night, to find the last three chapters were still a mess, and I still have twenty two to go...then add my tired brain and all. Yeah, I was ready to give up.  All of your comments helped a lot, and some of them even made me laugh. So, today I pulled out my grammar book and flipped through it, scribbling down sentences on a legal pad. Sentences and things like, COULSON LIVES! I now feel a little better, and chapter four didn't turn out as horrible as chapter three, which I'm still dreading going over again. 
[image error] My friend and I are a bit guilty...
 However, the good news is I've been able to add things to the plot which I think will help it along. There's been a lot I've been able to do with Tony, and I love how it has turned out. (I'd give a bit of information but it would give away a lot from the later books.)
 Also! I now have vinegar so I can turn an egg into a kind of bouncy ball. (Don't tell my flatmate.) And now I'm going to end my ramblings because I have a feeling none of it makes any sense. 
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 However, I've something to share as a kind of thank you for your thoughtful, helpful comments and prayers. (Oh yes, I've gotten a few leads on jobs. So if you wouldn't mind to keep praying I'd be grateful.) Anyhow, this isn't a very good thank you because I said I would reveal it today anyways. But, it is the best my worn out brain can come up with. 
 Also, bear in mind it isn't edited. I won't be releasing any of the edited scenes just yet. Later, when I've polished it, I will share the first couple lines from the book along with the none edited ones so you can see how it has changed.
[image error] Mine is fiction
 But here it is! The prologue! Keep in mind this will not be moved to the short stories page. This is the only post I will be putting it on. I hope you enjoy it. (I felt bad writing it, it is mean to do what I did to such a nice character as Peter. However, putting this in cleaned up the first chapter SO much! I was shocked. I was able to take out all the choppiness and dull bits. I'm still amazed at how much it helped the plot along.)
 (Sorry for the choppiness of this post.) Enjoy!!! 
[image error] Different shot of the one yesterday.

In which a Trust is BetrayedLondon, EnglandThe night was dark and cold, a chill wind cutting through the back allies, moaning in a most bone chilling manner. A man and a woman were slipping through the shadows, the woman shivering though it was impossible to tell if she was shivering from the cold or from the haunting sound which was almost worse then the cold. The man, a tall, broad shouldered fellow with handsome features that were hidden by the darkness, slipped a comforting arm over the woman's thin shoulders as they walked. “It is going to be all right,” he whispered, his voice soothing in the darkness, “you'll see. We're nearly there. Once she learns of the danger we are in she will help us.”The woman did her best to smile but it was obvious it took a great deal of willpower to force her thin lips to turn up. Tears sparkled in her eyes, visible even in the dim alley. “I trust you,” she whispered, her voice chocked with a sob, “it's just-”The woman was cut off when an even darker shape emerged from the shadows in front of them. The woman screamed and grasped to the man tighter, he in turn reaching for something that was hidden under his thick coat. Before he could, however, the stranger pointed something shinny at the woman. “It is too late, Noah Jones,” the stranger growled, a note of triumph in his voice. The man, Noah Jones, stiffened. “You!” he gasped, his voice a mixture of pain, seething anger, and dreadful fear. “It can't be!”The man in front of him smiled, and even in the dimness his white teeth began to gleam. “It is,” he reassured.“But,” the woman was now shaking so much she could hardly stand and her husband had to keep her on her feet, “you, you can't do this!” she gasped faintly. “Why not?” the man asked, fringing surprise and wonder. “This is war, is it not? And you two are traitors!”Noah Jones bit his lower lip so hard he tasted blood. “We trusted you!” he yelled in anger. “A foolish mistake on your part,” the man said, clicking his tongue as if in pity. “What about Peter?” the woman sobbed. “What will you do to our son?”The man's smile widened, turning even colder. “You see, that's the thing, isn't it, Olivia Jones? As of right now, Peter is still of some use. There may be a chance he will reveal to me everything I wish to know. Of course, if he doesn't, he will meet the same end as you two.”“You will not harm my son!” Noah Jones yelled and made to draw his pistol. A horrible shot cut through the thick darkness. Olivia Jones screamed as her husband gasped in pain, then his hand slipped from her shoulders and he crashed to the ground. She dropped beside him, grasping his hands, clinging to him, but it was too late. He was gone. Laughing, the man stepped closer to the sobbing woman who was now laying over her husband's body, clinging to him for dear life. Her sobs were cutting and horrible but seemed to have no effect on the man who leveled his pistol at her. She looked up, tears streaming down her face, sorrow showing over every inch of her. “Please,” she whispered around brokenhearted sobs, “my son. Please, spare him.”For a moment the man appeared to be wavering. His eyes drifted to the dead body, then back to her tear stained face. Then he slowly shook his head, and pulled the trigger. 

 Well, what did you think?

 Allons-y!!!!!!

"Oh, I'm so glad we made up."

 If I don't live through this, I want one of you to show up at my burial dressed as the Grim Reaper. Don't say a word, just stand silently while the service is going. Another of you is ordered to bury me with an elephant bone just so I can confuse the future people. Another has to update my facebook and another my twitter. Say things like, "I died." And then keep posting random comments. Movie quotes, and anything you can think of. 
 Thank you.
[image error]
 Okay, so I'm being a bit dramatic, but today's editing almost did me in. Besides, I now want to die so all of you can do all those things for me. Oh yes! And I insist someone MUST play Stayin' Alive. Like, wait until it gets all quiet and such and then turn it up really loud. Just don't let my cousin dance. 
 Anyways....
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 On a rare serious note I'd like to ask for prayer for two things. One is that I will be able to get this book edited and will be able to do it well. The other is that I will find a job by next week. The one I have is ending on Tuesday and I've no leads to anything else. And, with a flat to pay for, that isn't good. The job I thought I had fell through and I can't seem to get one anywhere in town, also it is fast becoming harder with school starting. So, if you could pray for me I would be MOST grateful. It has been a test on my trust in God that He will provide for me.

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 Also, I'm sorry if my comments on your blogs are short and, somewhat discombobulated. I fear it is either that or no comment at all. No, that or me short circuiting my brain, which might be fun to see.

 Well, back to the....point of this post? Yes, I suppose that is it. I have some cover things Clair and I have been working on. Right now I will just share the ideas she is kind of going off. These are just colour ideas, not actually designs she is trying out. (We're still kind of working on the design.)

This is one colour idea we've had. The browns and golds will give it an older feel, kind of like an old photo.
We've also considered adding more colour. Something like this, bright and stand outing...
Or, something in the middle of the two.
 Now I need to go. I have to redo the three chapters I've been editing. Somehow, replacing was with had makes everything sound worse. 
 Quote is from the coming movie review. The hero's best friend walks in on this girl and the hero, who is pointing a pistol at her. 
 Which colour scheme do you like best? ALLONS-Y!!!

"FOR NAARRRNNNIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

 We interrupt this programme to say.....
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 Thank you, and see you tomorrow. *Sorry, I didn't get a chance to ask Clair about the covers, and my movie review isn't ready yet.*
 Allons-y!!!!!!!!

"This could be our last moment together. There's something I need to ask you. Did you cut my fuel line?"

 Actress look alikes. 
[image error] Yep.
  So, I've been editing all day. My editor pointed out I use "was" too much. I didn't think it possible. Here is the proof. 
It was Isidore's job to travel to London and scour the city until he found this Peter Jones, then take him to the Baron. It was a simple enough case and normally he wouldn't have taken it but the Baron was paying extremely well. Yet, now that he was here he was wondering if it was worth it.
[image error] This is for Clair, who loves Watson's Jumpers. (Kitty?)
 That sentence is just bad without all the was. But, now you see what I'm up against. I'm now having to re-work many of the sentences, as in, all, to fix this problem. From what I've been able to understand, was is a pass adverb. (I'm sorry if I get this all wrong. I went to a class to learn all this, but no matter how much I learn it I forget it.) And I need to use present adverbs. Was usually directs the action to the thing instead of the person, I think. 
 In short, my poor brain looks like a fried egg and for the life of me I can't think of one single book review to do. So, you don't get one. Sorry, kind of. Part of me is sorry, the other part is asleep and wants a marshmallow. 
[image error] Totally
 This will be my brain for the next few...however long it takes until I'm done editing. 
 Until then you shall have to endure me. My long, random rants about nothing. My posting lots of pictures because while I'm thinking of new sentences I look up funny pictures. Now is a good time to start following me on Pintrest. 
 Who came up with that name?
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 So...sorry about the randomness, but at least this means the book is making its way closer to being published. 
 Tomorrow I think, if it is all right with Clair, I will share the rough ideas we have for the cover. For now though, I'm going to bed. Maybe after I finish a cool movie Clair told me about. And yes, I will be sharing this later. It is so cool it gets a review. 
[image error] No wonder he's bad.

 Quote is from the movie I plan to review.  But for now...
 ALLONS-Y!!!! And back to the editing!!!

"Just because you see a black man in a nice car doesn't mean he stole it. I...did steal this one...But not because I'm black!"

 Music Monday, eh? Well, first, I have a bit of good news...no, two!
 First is, my dear Clair - whom I got the honour of Skyping with...and who is wonderfully amazing - is going to be doing the cover for the book! We are now working on poses for Peter, he's not a patient model. Also I am trying to pick a layout. Clair has always sent me a rough sketch of some of her ideas so maybe later this week I will share them on here. 
 Second is that we FINALLY have all the filming done for the trailer! HURRAY! Everyone had fun with it once we started but getting them to start was like pulling teeth. However, it is done, so now all it needs is to be put together. (Also, I'll not be revealing bloopers this time as William Knisley has offered to help me make something special with them. You will get to see them, just later on.)
 Third...yeah, I forgot about the third until a moment ago. My editor has sent me her first over view of the book. I've been working on it over the past week. It is slow going, but I THINK I'm getting the hang of it. 
 Oh, forget it. Here is four. William is coming over maybe tomorrow to help me with author pictures and hopefully poses so Clair can have something to work with. I'm always open to any excuse to getting out leather jackets. 
 Five. Prologue coming this week! Finally, I know. I'm thinking Friday. 
 Now, for the music. 
This Music Monday Song is simply here because reminds me of my very nice weekend which made up for a not so great week and in which I realized two very important things.  Quote is from Men in Black 3. I wouldn't really recommend the movie because of the language. But it is a bit of a fun movie. 

"It was a short cut." "To what?" "MUSHROOMS!"

 Ciao a tutti!
 Oh wait...none of you speak Italian, do you? Let me try that again. 
 Hello. 

 My name is Singur. I'm Italian, a Scientist, and an Inventor. I'm also on the run for my life...but that is besides the point. I also like ice cream, in case you wanted to know. Italian ice cream...because it is the best ice cream in the world. Italian, cream ice cream with vanilla and cookie crumbles on it...
 ...
 Okay, I'm back. I had to go and get some ice cream. Oh, yes, and I'm supposed to write a post. This was Peter's idea. I think it is a good idea. Not as good as going out for ice cream, but still. 
This is for Jack and her sister.
 I decided I would share a machine in this post. I think Jack has already written about it, but I like this machine a lot. And I don't have anything else to write about, unless it is ice cream...or Speeders. I like Speeders. Not as much as I like Electrical Lights though. 
 The machine I'm going to tell you about is called a Marcher. Jack has compared it to a tank. I don't know what a tank is, I think it is something in her world, so I don't know if a Marcher is like a tank but if it is, I would say it is much more interesting then a tank. Can a tank crash through whole cities? Can it level walls? Can it blast forests to...splinters? (Jack says it can...I don't really believe her.) And I know what you're thinking. None of this sounds good. But if this machine was used by the good guys...me and those fighting with me...we wouldn't be using it to blast the world to pieces. 

 (I have never used the word blast before...I kind of like it. It is so descriptive.)
 Jack wrote about the Marcher's legs and levers. She told how the men who run them are trained for years to work together. And all of that is good to know. But she didn't tell you how to stop one...I don't think she did at least. 
 She says the Marcher is made of hardened metal. Let me give you a further description of this. The metal is in fact two plates, each two inches thick. The two pieces are then forged together and hardened with fire and water. Also a special chemical I cannot reveal because it would get me in trouble. In short, the Marcher is practically unstoppable. Unless you know of its one weak spot....

 *Glances over at Jack.* Should I not reveal the weak spot yet?
 Thank you for asking. See, this is why I like you. Ummmmmmm...................................try not to go into too much detail. If that is possible. 
 I shall refrain myself. Okay. Well, the best way to stop the Marcher, I've learned, is to shoot it. There was one small fault in the design...SMALL fault. Tiny. It is hard to find, unless you know it is there...faults happen even to the best of us...

 Singur.
 Sorry. Um...O Si. The fault. The Marcher is run by an oven which in turn runs the boiler system which in turn feeds steam through all the gears. The oven needs to be kept hot at all times. And, if the Marcher is being run, for a long time or at a very fast speed, the oven heats up the metal around it. Therefore, a powerful rifle bullet, well aimed, can pierce the metal, destroying the oven, and crippling the Marcher. 
 Keep in mind. Bullets are the best way to stop it. Bullets. 

 Okay...spoilers. 
 Right. Anyhow, here is a drawing of the Marcher. A wonderful rendition done by Signorina Clair Caprice. (Don't worry, I don't think she works for the enemy. Though she did a very good drawing of it...and no one could do such a well one unless they have first seen it...in great detail...hm....CLAIR!)

 If you wish to learn more about the Marcher you can read HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I...and Singur...would love to know what you think. 

"How would it be, if you came and had tea with me?"

 Sometimes it is nice having someone else post for you. This morning I woke up dead tired. I forced myself to eat, then when my boss said I didn't have to work today I went back to bed and slept until nine thirty. Thinking I had slept too late I stood up, and promptly fell over. I then lay on the floor until I could move again, crawled back into bed, and have not moved much sense. (In short, I caught a cold that has turned into a nasty case of the flu. One of the worse I've had in awhile. So, I'm leaving. Sleep sounds nice.)*** Have you ever ran into a fellow you can't stand? Someone you are around and you just wish to throw them into boiling hot oil? I meet a lot of people like this, but at the moment Peter Jones has surpassed them all in his ability to be annoying. I've never met anyone like him, thankfully. However, seeing that Jack is ill, I suppose it is the least I can do. I don't see the point in all this though. But, it isn't for me to question how Jack runs things around here...not usually at least. So, I will do this task the little Aeropilot has thrown at me. 

 My name is Isidore Thaddeus Reichmann and I am the most brilliant man you will ever meet. I'm a German detective who's abilities are known world wide, and with good reason. There has never been a case yet I've not been able to solve. Nor will there ever be one. I...
 Blimey! I don't think Peter meant for you to use this post to brag about yourself. 
 I wasn't bragging, Jack O'Malley. I was just stating the facts as they are. 

 No, you were bragging. Stating the facts would be saying you're a detective. Bragging is when you try and snub everyone.
 I'm much more then a detective. And I don't "snub" as you put it. That is Steed. 
 Oi! I think you two could be best friends if you both weren't so stuck up. 
 I will never have a best friend. 
 You could. 
 No...and I fail to see why we are even talking about this on here. Don't you have something better to be doing? Feeding Max, for example? 

 I fed him. 
 I don't suppose you fed Peter to him?
 ...
 Ahem...as I was saying. I am from Germany, originally. At the moment, however, I am in England. 
 With me!

 Yes...in England with Jack O'Malley and her confused dog. 
 Oi! He's not confused!
 He thinks he's human...
 Well...
 There is no possible way he could be any less confused! He tried to sit and have tea with us last night!
 He did have tea with us

 Only because you gave him his own tea cup! He's a dog, Jack. Dogs don't drink out of tea cups and eat cookies. No wonder he is having identity issues. 
 It isn't kind to have tea in front of someone and not invite them to join in. 
 He's a dog. What did you do to him, anyways? I don't think puppies are born thinking they are human. 
 O'Malley says it is because I used to talk to him all the time. But, I kind of had to. He was my only friend. 

 Right...anyways. I think we've completely messed up this post. When Peter finds out you must tell him you are at fault for it. 
 Blimey! You're supposed to be the gentleman!
 Stop saying blimey. And no, Max is the gentleman. 
 He also has your cloak. 
 WHAT?! Get back here you dumb dog!!!!!!

 And now that he is gone, I shall take over. Oi, this should be fun! You will have to pardon Isidore. I think something bad happened to him as a child, like, he lost his favourite teddy bear as a baby or his pet frog was hit by a wagon...don't tell him I said he had a teddy bear. But, as you probably noticed, he's not the jolliest chap on the planet. I've never even seen him smile in fact...maybe he can't. I think if a chap never smiled once in his life, such as Isidore, and suddenly was to his face would break. It would be a pity...he has a nice face.
 Don't tell him I said that either. 
 But, even though he's grumpy and doesn't smile, he's very nice. You should see what he did to help me out...

 JACK! Spoilers! Ug! See, this is why I can't get sick around here. Give me that!
 Okay, sorry. I'm ending this post before Jack gives away everything from the books. And I need to go and break up a fight between Max and Isidore. Tomorrow should be more interesting. Singur says he has something special planned. I'm going to bed. 

 Who put up the girly, tea party pictures?...Wait...JACK O'MALLEY! I did not have a teddy bear!!!!!

"Dude, I hate to say this. But your mom scares me."

 So, as seen yesterday, my characters decided I needed a break and have taken up the task of posting this week. However, I have some fast updates for you. The first is, I hope to be releasing the prologue this week. I've yet to pick the day. Also, my editor has sent me the first completed edited version of the book. I, therefore, need to go over it and fix it up and send it back. (I use was FAR too much so I'm having to re-write sentences without it. It really gives my brain a work out.)


 Now, I'm leaving.
*** Um...hello. I think here is a good place to note a few things.
 One: This was all Pete's idea so if you have to endure a crummy entry, blame him.
 Two: My name is Anthony Verne, but call me Tony because people only call me Anthony when they're mad at me.  Three: No one may call Peter Pete but me. He wished me to tell you this just in case you started.  Four: How come, every time Peter writes on here Darcy shows up?
 Because he's an idiot and needs my help....sorry, I'm leaving. 

I don't do commentary on pictures. Sorry. 
 Anyways, it is kind of a known fact that I am not an Aeropilot like my friend. Instead, I'm the mechanic. I'm scared of heights. And yes, I am a bit ashamed to admit this. I'm also ashamed to admit I'm now sailing about with an Air Pirate by the name of Captain Shamus Steed, his his foul tempered younger brother, a Scot who insists on wearing a kilt and annoying the captain (I'm glad Peter doesn't insist on wearing a kilt), and the rest of the crew. 

 How did I come to this? Simple. I was unable to find a wife before someone offered me a job. (So, young men out there. It is best to get married BEFORE you take a life changing job that takes you far from your home and family and drops you in the worse place you can possibly imagine.)

 I suppose I could go on and on complaining about this new, what should I call it? Path. Maybe. New path in my life that has me dodging a raging mad man and his brother and trying to keep my best friend from meeting an untimely end, but I think I will write about something much more interesting. 



 ..........

 Did I also mention I'm an incredibly boring person? If it wasn't for Peter, the Air Force, and the Air Pirates I would probably be spending the rest of my life in Russia, sitting in front of a roaring fire, wondering if winter will ever end. Maybe this is why I can't get a girl...Naw. 

 I'm sorry. I know this has no point to it and shall leave you with a poor impression of me. But, as I said, it was Peter's idea. And he should have known I would slaughter it. Now, I think I'm going to see if I can find some coffee...and make certain Darcy hasn't killed Pete. 



 Thank you all for reading. I hope....I hope, I don't know what I hope. I hope you get some sleep. Which I plan to do. After my coffee.
 *** Captain Shamus Steed here. Now you see why I don't like him. 
*** Jack here. Sorry. Tony isn't really...well, this isn't really his field of expertise. But you should see him repair a Zeppelin or Aeroplane. There is no one faster.

 I'm just stopping by to say, quote is from Grimm. Season Two is out! I'm sooo happy! I've missed Monroe so much. Also, excited for the prologue? 

So, as seen yesterday, my characters decided I need...

 So, as seen yesterday, my characters decided I needed a break and have taken up the task of posting this week. However, I have some fast updates for you. The first is, I hope to be releasing the prologue this week. I've yet to pick the day. Also, my editor has sent me the first completed edited version of the book. I, therefore, need to go over it and fix it up and send it back. (I use was FAR too much so I'm having to re-write sentences without it. It really gives my brain a work out.)


 Now, I'm leaving.
*** Um...hello. I think here is a good place to note a few things.
 One: This was all Pete's idea so if you have to endure a crummy entry, blame him.
 Two: My name is Anthony Verne, but call me Tony because people only call me Anthony when they're mad at me.  Three: No one may call Peter Pete but me. He wished me to tell you this just in case you started.  Four: How come, every time Peter writes on here Darcy shows up?
 Because he's an idiot and needs my help....sorry, I'm leaving. 

I don't do commentary on pictures. Sorry. 
 Anyways, it is kind of a known fact that I am not an Aeropilot like my friend. Instead, I'm the mechanic. I'm scared of heights. And yes, I am a bit ashamed to admit this. I'm also ashamed to admit I'm now sailing about with an Air Pirate by the name of Captain Shamus Steed, his his foul tempered younger brother, a Scot who insists on wearing a kilt and annoying the captain (I'm glad Peter doesn't insist on wearing a kilt), and the rest of the crew. 

 How did I come to this? Simple. I was unable to find a wife before someone offered me a job. (So, young men out there. It is best to get married BEFORE you take a life changing job that takes you far from your home and family and drops you in the worse place you can possibly imagine.)

 I suppose I could go on and on complaining about this new, what should I call it? Path. Maybe. New path in my life that has me dodging a raging mad man and his brother and trying to keep my best friend from meeting an untimely end, but I think I will write about something much more interesting. 


 ..........

 Did I also mention I'm an incredibly boring person? If it wasn't for Peter, the Air Force, and the Air Pirates I would probably be spending the rest of my life in Russia, sitting in front of a roaring fire, wondering if winter will ever end. Maybe this is why I can't get a girl...Naw. 

 I'm sorry. I know this has no point to it and shall leave you with a poor impression of me. But, as I said, it was Peter's idea. And he should have known I would slaughter it. Now, I think I'm going to see if I can find some coffee...and make certain Darcy hasn't killed Pete. 


 Thank you all for reading. I hope....I hope, I don't know what I hope. I hope you get some sleep. Which I plan to do. After my coffee.
 *** Captain Shamus Steed here. Now you see why I don't like him. 
*** Jack here. Sorry. Tony isn't really...well, this isn't really his field of expertise. But you should see him repair a Zeppelin or Aeroplane. There is no one faster.

 I'm just stopping by to say, quote is from Grimm. Season Two is out! I'm sooo happy! I've missed Monroe so much. Also, excited for the prologue? 

"Get that thing out of my face." "It's not in your face, it's in my hand." "Get what is in your hand out of my face."

 This computer has been hacked...though with permission. 
 Because the Great Peter Jones would never hack anything unless he asked first. 
 I'm going to ignore you for the rest of this post, Darcy Steed.  As if I care. I have a hundred and one things I could be doing that are far more interesting then watching you pick through a keyboard, looking for the right letters to hit. 
This is how I usually look at Jones. For once we agree on something.
 As I was saying, or going to say. My name is Peter Jones, and I'm here to help out my author. You see, she has completely worn herself out. I'm not sure when it happened, or how. I was off, resting after the end of the book and when I came back I found her half asleep and staring blankly at pictures online. 
 Wow, you actually know what online is?!
Watson's baffled look is how I look after Jones says anything.Are we really going to do this again?
 Therefore, I took her out yesterday to give her a nice, relaxing day. We walked about an old part of town, had a picnic of bread, cheese, olives, berries, and milk. Got peppermint sticks in a chocolate shoppe. Then, we returned to her flat and read and watched cartoons, then went to a movie called Men in Black 3, and then out for milk shakes. 
 Pitiful when the only girl you can impress is your own author. 
Something Jones and Sherlock Holmes have in common. They will never get a girl.I doubt you will either. No girl could stand you for more then five minutes.Oooo! Peter Jones has FINALLY come up with a come back! How does it feel?Maybe I can teach you how to fly, without a Zeppelin or Aeroplane.Just try it.
 I think it helped, but she is still tired and not fully awake today. Therefore, Tony, Singur, Isidore, and I have decided to finish out her posts for this week, maybe even do some next week. At the end of this, maybe even this week, she will be releasing the Prologue which I know some of you requested. I myself am not looking forward to it...
When girls meet Jones they too pull a pistol on him.And how would you know this? You've only known me a few weeks.I know your type. You're the type girls run from, screaming.
 But moving on. As you might have guessed, I'm not really good at writing, in any form or fashion. After all, I'm a soldier, an Aeropilot. I have slightly more interesting things to do then sit in front of this contraption that is called a computer and hammer out words. I'm not even sure what I'm going to say. 
 Real shocker there. 
Jack said I should do this one. Something about Jones and I and an explosion.Wait...don't tell me you try and blow us up!You probably blow up the Zeppelin.Only in an attempt to...wait...did Jack just give away a spoiler?Maybe she is tired...great, now you have me worried about her.
 I could tell you a bit about myself but Jack asked me not to as she has something special planned before the book comes out. Something like an interview for all of us characters. So, all that said, and since I've taken up most of this post with short ramblings, I will continue with this. 
Do you think this looks like...No, not evil enough.Right, this chap is too refined.
 Helpful Hints One Needs To Know If Kidnapped By Air Pirates. 
 That is what I would title a book, were I ever to write one. 
 We didn't kidnap you, Fly Boy! We...
 Now, in case you are wondering what sets an Air Pirate apart from a Sea Pirate the answer is simple. Sea Pirates sail on ships or in submarines. 
 No....seriously?!
This looks more like him.Yes. Makes my skin crawl.
 Whereas Air Pirates fly in contraptions known as Zeppelins. (And, I must admit, these Zeppelins are amazing. I believe Jack's friend, Clair, is making pictures for the book, so you will be able to see it. But, I will explain it for you real fast.)
Don't tell me you're going to make another girl remark.No. I was actually thinking about Tony....I'm going to tell him you were laughing.DON'T YOU DARE!
The body of it was rounded at the back and pointed at the front. There was a large propeller at the back, but one that was not so big it would chop the balloon to pieces when it was on. A large window gleamed at the front of the Zeppelin, smaller windows running along the side. Metal ladders rose up over the balloon, reaching to a narrow metal deck which was over it, the whole thing looked like a metal cage wrapped around the balloon. 
 I stole this from the book. 
 See, you have the makings of an Air Pirate in you already!
Look. It's your brother's coat.No. It isn't black, or dramatic enough.Good point...
 It is an unedited description but it very close. Zeppelins are silent, they can glide through the air without a sound and are always hidden under their own, man made cloud cover. This is how they are able to float into towns and cities, allowing the Air Pirates to sneak into houses and take whatever they fancy. 
One remark and I'm punching you in the nose.Temper, temper.
 One of my jobs as Aeropilot was to hunt down and stop Air Pirates. But, well, things didn't go as planned. But enough of that for now. 
 Because you don't wish them to know you joined us. 
 The first thing you most know about Air Pirates is they are temperamental. It is probably a requirement and if one doesn't have a violent temper they cannot become an Air Pirate. 
 If that's the case then you are one of the best. 
Who are these two?Another Sherlock and Watson.How many are there?!About...a hundred. The fellow is probably the most well known man in history.What did he do?Smoked a pipe...tormented his best friend.If one of us started smoking a pipe maybe we could be famous.We're not best friends.
 Another thing you must know is that they are complete know-it-alls. 
 Well, you fail there. 
 Never get into an argument with an Air Pirate, it usually ends with a sword in your heart, getting your head removed, or them seeing if you can fly. (I've heard before this is Steed's favourite way to deal with people he dislikes. Throwing them from the Zeppelin in midair.)
I wouldn't mind glasses like this.
 The best advice I can give is to avoid them as much as possible. Sometimes, even if you are very careful, you still run into them though. This can be dangerous, especially if they are in a bad mood - and they usually are. In this case, the best you can do is deck them, and then find somewhere to hide. I've learned that if you want to know where the best hiding places are you need to ask Kirk. 
This is just odd.For once we agree on something.
 He should know. He's had lots of practice. And we aren't always in bad moods!!
 And lastly. If you find yourself on Shamus Steed's Zeppelin...
 CAPTAIN SHAMUS STEED!!!
 If you hear him yelling in French...it is time to write your will. 
 TU ES MORT!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I had a cane I would be tempted to hit you with it.How come whenever I write on here YOU pick all the pictures?I'm cleverer then you.But you've been comparing me to Sherlock Holmes this whole time.Shut up.
 Okay, time for me to hide. BYE!
 Imbecile. 
Jack owns this movie.Shall we?Eh, why not. I have nothing better to do today.