Jack Lewis Baillot's Blog, page 22

"Hey, I may have dropped it a few times but Marlo is the one who left it in the dyer."

 Wherein Jack is jittery.

 I decided sleep is over rated, more than I thought it was before. I was so tired last week I had plans to sleep in on the weekend, and I woke up early and couldn't even fall asleep. Just dozed off and on. 
 Pfft, sleep.
 But, because of that, in a round about way, I started to really write again. I finished up a short story over the weekend and started working on Haphazardly Implausible again. I'm really pleased with how it is turning out now. Gooooooooooooooooood bye plot holes!!!!! I also pulled out the third Loyalty book and confirmed what I've always know. I STINK at writing romances. Horrible. And not in the cute kind of horrible way. In the bury your head in a sand hill like an ostrich kind of way.
 My rib also started to feel much better over the weekend. I can almost get my right arm completely over my head again, almost. Who knew how much a broken rib could limit mobility of an arm? I'm done with them though. Next time I break something I'm going for a leg or arm. No more ribs. (I say as I still have no idea how I did it and therefore could do it again with no knowledge I am doing it.)
 Of course, one reason I am jittery is because I am able to move and do things and braid my hair again instead of cramming it into a disarrayed pony tail because I was unable to get my arm up high enough for very long. But that isn't the only reason.
 The other has to do with my book.
 Of course, I can't reveal it yet because it isn't set in stone QUITE yet....BUT THERE'S A RELEASE DATE! And I found out it is going to end up on CBD, the Christianbooks.com place. I was shocked when I found out. It is also going to be sent to Amazon and Barnes and Noble as well.
 Things are happening!
 Except for right now, because I'm really tired and want to try and get some sleep. (HAHAHHA) That over rated thing I talked about earlier.
 I leave you with the last Psych quote I stored away - more are likely to show up again at some point, but this is the end of the storage I had of them from the last marathon I did.

"I'm going to ask you this calmly...are you insane?"

 This is how you see me, no?
 To everyone on here I am known as Jack. Only a few of you know my real name, and you've been wonderful sports about it and have kept it top secret. I think I've explained the reason behind the pen name by now. But just as a reminder, and for those who might not know...
 My real name isn't Jack. Nor is my middle name Lewis or my last name Baillot. All of these names I borrowed or was given. (I borrowed Lewis and Baillot, which I was known by for a while before I was given the name Jack.)
 Why do I call myself Jack? Rather why did I accept the nick name, adopt it as my pen name, and keep my real name top secret? Why do I hide my face in pictures? WHY AM I SO WEIRD?!
 First...I wanted to stand out when I started on the publishing road. I didn't want to be another self-published Author no one remembered. So I stole a trick from Lemony Snicket, little knowing the world knows his real name. (Or the Author's name...or..you get the idea.)  hid my face. I hid my name. And it worked. It was a marketing scheme in part, in another part...I've always wanted to be a spy and this seemed as close as I could get.
 Second...why am I so weird? Who knows.
 Over the years I told my real name to some of my closest online friends. Others found out when things had to be mailed to me. I might have revealed it to someone else under torture....you know...enemies and all that. But some of my friends who found out my name were surprised. Something about it not fitting me, it being a name they never would have guessed...something like that.
 And it got me thinking, along with the fact I'm not sure how much longer I can keep this up. Someday, maybe soon, I might have to reveal my real name. Maybe. I am going to try as long as possible not to....but things happen.
 Until then, before then....just in case that does happens, I thought it would be fun to hold a guessing game.
 In other words, I'm curious to know what all of you think my real name is...those who don't know.
 What do you think? Sound fun? I think I'll have the guess game open for a week. Until next Friday. (And no, I won't reveal my real name at the end of the week. Like I said, I'm only sharing it if I have to. And right now I don't have to. So ha!)
 And there...that is....my challenge? 
 You can begin guessing.
 As for me, I'm going to spend my Friday nights as I usually do....tucked safely in my flat with tea and a good book. Or Doctor Who.

"Mexican Lassie, way better than American Lassie by the way."

 Wherein Jack is here
 I think I had something else to say but I sort of forgot it when I went to get an eye lash out of my eye.
 So, someone - I kind of forgot who because I was side tracked with chocolate - pointed out that I hadn't ever told WHO my publisher is. Leave it to me to get so excited about having one I leave out that detail. *Coughcough*
 The company is Dove Publishers. WEBSITE HERE
 And...I was just looking around the site to try and find the Author Page they set up for me. And I found THIS. 
 Actually that was really unexpected. I know they've been working on it, but I didn't know it was on the website yet for PREORDER. I have a book which can be PREORDERED!
 (I might have cried....a lot.)
 I also just approved the final cover. So that happened today as well. 
 And I got a new Author picture in honor of the book coming. (My friend Ben helped me, because I tried to do it alone and that didn't work out.) 
 I can't really think of more to say. I'm still too stunned. So here is the AUTHOR PAGE. You should also check out the Sample Chapter, because they made the inside pretty!
 Farewell my readers!
Quote is from Psych

"I'd rather spend all day at the mall with McNab,"

 In honor of having sent Brothers-in-Arms back to my publisher I am going to post one of the songs which reminds me of the book.


 This is a very Franz and Japhet song but it also fits Caleb, Warren, and Karl as well. Probably Danny and Jimmy and some of the other friendships if you look deep enough.
The quote is from Lassie.
 And that is all I have for right now.

"That and the fact you and Guster aren't dead, I'm boarder line furious."

 Wherein Jack is done.

 Editing.
 You heard that right.
 It's done. My publishers have it.
 DONE.
 And this is how I feel.
It's kind of how I look right now too.
And this, but not as fabulous.
 This is how I felt
 This is how my friends felt
 And this is what I thought of....my friends


 Then fixing the plot hole
 And how the plot hole looked until I fixed it up
Oh yeah, and let's not forget how much more realistic I was able to make Japhet's broken rib thanks to my own.
And finally, this is how nervous I feel sending the final draft into my publishers. Because. This. Is. IT!

 That's all. I leave you with a quote from Lassie. Because Lassie
 Also I won't be posting on Friday. That's why I did it today. I am done editing, so I am going to hide in a Hobbit hole because it's a little scary to send the final draft into publishers.
 This. Is. HAPPENING!

"My girlfriend has a new boyfriend. My best friend has a girlfriend and my mom bought me shorts."

 I had an idea for a post today, but somewhere between walking to work, frantically trying to fix the final plot hole in Brothers-in-Arms, and then falling asleep for an hour and a half thanks to my medication I kind of forgot it.
 Naughty me.
 I actually have no clue now what to talk about. Except my book perhaps.
 While editing today I came across a plot hole I had not figured out before. I need to get the book to my publishers by Friday, and coming across a plot hole was not what I needed right now. I shamelessly panicked and contacted everyone who had read the book, begging for help.
 In other words, I spent all afternoon pacing my floor and mulling over the plot hole. Thanks to my friend I was able to fix it without drastically needing to change the book. It turned out to be a simple fix for all the trouble it gave me. (It was even a major plot hole, which I should have caught long before this.)
 I was so nervous I managed to get another square done for my 2016 Quilt. (I'm a nervous knitted and get a lot of knitting done while I edit.)
 This post is short, but frantically fixing plot holes is kind of exhausting. Or maybe it was pacing the floor. Or knitting like a mad man. Or all of the above. (My hair suffered from all of this and my bangs are now standing on end. So I might look a little crazy on top of everything else.)
 I'm going to bed though. 
 Leaving you with another Psych quote. This is the one which no longer sounds strange to me because my adopted family says stuff like this all the time. (Some of them are in denial, but deep down they know it's true. I've had dinner with them, I've heard their conversations. They can't deny it to me.)

"Our adult vacation." "Yes. Want to see how long it takes this grape to hit the ground?" "Yes!"

 Wherein Jack likes the good guys.
 With the release of The Force Awakens - which I saw, loved, want to see again, as well as want to watch the other movies which I can't find ANYWHERE - there has been a lot of talk about good guys vs. bad guys. Or rather the good boy/ bad boy. (Don't throw things at me. I'm not here to point fingers and this isn't to pick at my friends who tend to like the bad boy characters more. This is just my ramble, nothing else.)
 I've watched all the Star Wars movies. I grew up watching the original and I really liked the stories, but especially as I got older. I then saw the prequel and had to put up with the never ending rants in defense or against Anakin. (I guess that is all still going on, even with a new movie for the world to poke and prod and pick apart.)
 I think by now, everyone knows about the biggest spoiler in The Force Awakens - the spoiler of who Kylo Ren really is. But if not then you might want to skip this post because I will be talking about him and I won't be keeping his real name a secret.
 Ye've been warned.
 It wasn't until the Anakin rants started that I realized there was even a good boy/ bad boy thing going on in the movies. As I said, I know a lot of people who like the bad boy characters more in movies. Or the ones which would be given that title. The darker ones, with the sad back stories and who don't always make the right choices. (Anakin, Kylo Ren, Han. Though I think Han might not be able to be considered so much a bad boy by the end, though I'm no expert on it.) I've listened to non stop defenses for these characters.
 Of course, I don't hate any of them. Anakin wasn't exactly a hero, he made a lot of mistakes, but in the end he died saving his son's life. He had a redeemable moment, which is something I love in character stories. Kylo Ren is certainly the bad boy in the new movie. (He kills his own dad, which I'm still mad about because no one just stabs Han through the heart. Rude.) Ren goes a little crazy, decides he's going to follow in his grandfather's foot steps - because that ended so well for Anakin - and kills all the other Jedi. He almost kills the hero of the movie, Finn, and then tries to kill Rey - who is either is sister or his cousin depending on what story line they are going with in this movie. (Ha, and you all assumed I wasn't that much of a geek, didn't you?)
 I, like I assume all of my friends who have become attached to Ren, hope he is redeemed by the end of the movies. Even with the fact he just killed his own father and the other Jedi, I still want him to be saved in the end. Just like I wanted Anakin to be saved - rather was glad he had been saved even after seeing his story.
 Now I'm not going to get into the back stories of Ren and Anakin. I'm not going to defend them or post anything against them. Because this isn't about them. Just understand I don't hate either of them, they just aren't my favorites.
 Sometimes I feel like I'm the only girl who really loves the good guy characters. (Not just in Star Wars but in other movies. I always go for the good guys. Steve Rogers has always been my favorite Avenger, even before Bucky showed up as a deadly assassin. Hawkeye was my other top favorite.) I like the stories of the guys who try to do the right thing. Does this mean I don't like a story where a character does things wrong, such as Tony, and begins to change and get better? No, I love that story line too, those just don't tend to be my top favorite characters. I do like them, I love to see them grow but still remain themselves - Shawn is another example - but in the end they're not the ones I would "fan girl" over.
 Such as in Star Wars, my ALL TIME favorite character in those movies is Luke. I've always loved Luke, even a little more than Han. Luke, without a supposed huge character arch. Luke who never seems to do anything wrong and is therefore viewed as too good to be believable, too perfect, too nice, too flawless, too wimpy.
 The same is with the new movie, and the prequel. I liked Obi Wan more then Anakin. I LOVED Finn in the new movie, so much.
 Why does this happen? Are these characters too perfect and good to be believable? Are their arches too small, or even worse, not there at all?
 I don't think so. They have struggles, just not the same ones. Luke didn't kill a bunch of little kids and then go after his best friend, after he almost killed his wife. Finn didn't kill all of the Jedi and then try and kill his master, only to later stab his father in the heart. But they didn't have a lack of struggle. In fact, they had pretty big ones.
 Luke lost everything he'd ever known. At first all he wants to do is leave his farm, to go on adventures, but then he sees how horrible adventures can really be. His uncle and aunt are killed, and without much warning he learns he's the last Jedi and has to save the world. That is kind of a lot to throw on a boy's shoulders, even a boy who wanted to go on adventures while stuck on a farm. But his real struggle and arch comes when he discovers that his father is the man who really, really wants him dead, the insane mad man who is trying to take over the galaxy and who he is supposed to kill. (Also that he had a twin sister he never even knew about.)
 Character arches don't have to be as huge as Anakin's, or take as long as Anakin's. An arch is bringing THAT certain character to his lowest point. Taking away everything THAT certain character needs to lose to reach that point. Like with people, this is different for each character. Anakin had to lose everything, but that still wasn't enough. To get him to his lowest point he is the one who had to take everything away from himself, and then realize he was about to continue doing that by killing his own son - with plans to kill his daughter once Luke was dead. It took him seeing someone else killing Luke, but his son still believing in him, to bring him back.
 Luke didn't need to go through all of that to be brought to his low point. He did get to that point, where he had to decide if he would hide and let the world take care of itself or if he would do the right thing.He just didn't turn into the bad boy character before hand, he always stayed the good boy character.
 The same with Finn. Finn's biggest struggle was in leaving the army, which he should get credit for. His whole life he'd been told a lie, and to decide on his own it wasn't the truth and to LEAVE is a big character arch in and of itself. He does slip back and forth for a while, like when he is going to leave Rey, only to in the end realize he is not the kind of man who can leave his friends when they need him the most. He goes back to face his biggest fear, recapture by the storm troops, to help Rey and Han.
 And I admire those characters. Why? Maybe because those characters are overlooked and misunderstood. Because they are viewed as being somehow less brave than the bad boy characters. Maybe even because they are sometimes seen as too good. Or maybe I like them simply because they are the kind of people I'd want to be around. Those who care more about others than themselves, who face their greatest fear for those who need them. Who do the right thing and don't let the world around them change them.

 I think I will leave it there. You now have my thoughts on this whether you wanted them or not.

 I leave you with a quote from Psych. I loved this scene. Jules might be my all time favorite girl character. She is serious about her job, sweet, quirky, girly, can shoot things including cross bows, can run in heels fabulously, and is also childish and will drop food off of a hot air balloon with Shawn.

"I need to go kill my best friend in the world." "And I need to go help him hide the body."

 Wherein Jack whines, complains, and drinks coffee.
 Do I whine? Yes, yes I do. Am I ashamed of it? Sometimes.
 Why do I whine you ask. What do I have to whine about. I have a nice house, a dog, food, tea - which is needed to live - blinky Christmas lights....you know, all those nice things which make a flat a cabin in the woods and keep your feet warm in winter. (Hint, that would be Dog.)
 But I still whine.
 Do I have a good reason for it? I like to think so.
 First off, I've been whining a lot about my rib. I had no idea a broken rib could hurt so badly. Not just hurt, but make life uncomfortable. Have you ANY idea how much you move your rib throughout the day? I didn't either. But it is NEVER still. Even doing simple things, like getting breakfast from the cupboards or putting on a seat belt. I've not taken this rib thing well at all. I was a better sport about having my teeth brutally yanked out of my head by Hydra. I think I'd handle a broken arm better - at least then they could cast it and I could club people with the cast.
 If that isn't enough to whine about the fact I have no good story to go with it should be. Whenever someone sees the sling and asks what happen all I can tell them is I broke my rib, and I don't know how. I can see it in their eyes, the disappointment when they realize they can't hear some crazy story about my wild New Year's Eve party or snowboarding accident. Not even slipping on the ice. Nothing. Because I have NO CLUE how I did it.
 Don't ask why. It's me, that should be answer enough.
 But let's move on to my other whiny complaint.
 Brothers-in-Arms. 
 Yes. My book. My lovely book with its own publisher. Its. Own. PUBLISHER.

 And I am whining.

 Why?

 BECAUSE THAT BOOK HURTS! That's why.

 The final edits came through. The cover is being worked on. I've seen hints of what it is going to look like.

 And I am whining.

 I think any of my beta readers might understand. And if not I shall explain in as few words as possible.

 Caleb.

 "I will always catch you."

 Caleb.

 Levi.

 Warren.

 There, now you understand.

 I have something of a cure for my sorrow. I have a special coffee which is not really coffee. It is one of those, so much cream and sugar it should be called sweetened milk but which for some reason can pass as coffee in the stores.

 When I come home from work I make a cup. I opened up my Brothers-in-Arms file. And I edit and whine into my coffee.

 And that is what being an Author is. Because we are strange creatures who whine into coffee and whatever snack happens to be within easy reach.

 Then when I finish editing I work on one of my many hobbies. Or not so many hobbies which involved things like fencing, learning Gaelic, swing dancing, screeching on my chanter, pretending I can play the banjo, working on deduction skills, and knitting. I knit a lot. I am knitting a quilt this year. A 2016 quit. I knit while I edit. It helps me not to yell at Stein. Sort of. I still yell. Just not as loud. Sometimes.

 And that is all. Because I have run out of things to say.

 Except that yes, you read this post right. Yes I am working on the final edit of Brothers-in-Arms - at least the one I believe is the final edit from my publishers. It is close I think, though I don't have certain dates yet.

 But it is getting close.

 And now I am going to go. Read a book. Knit. Things like that.

 Quote is from Psych. (Which I finally finished. A cried in the final one, all the way until the end, and then I laughed. But still, HOW DARE PSYCH MAKE ME CRY. LOVED the ending though. Perfect.)

"Seriously, dude...you need help."

 Wherein Jack was a ninja.

 Those who know me know I have spider issues. It's not really a 100 percent phobia. I looked up the definition of what arachnophobia entails and I'm not QUITE that bad. I can still function and I don't hole up in a place where spiders can't get me. (Okay, I sort of do, but I still get outside into the spider infested world and even sleep on the ground...the ground they have claimed for their homes.)
 So while I don't have every characteristic of the phobia I have something kind of like it.
 I just don't like spiders. At all. And not for the normal reasons. I'm not afraid of getting bit. It's their legs which scare me. All eight of them. Moving. Spiny. Creepy....I can't even talk about it without getting the shivers.
 I don't kill spiders though. I think my reasons behind this might not be as kind as the thought that I don't kill them. I don't kill them because I don't want to hear them squish. I don't want to see their legs stick out from under my boot. I don't want to try and kill them only to make them mad and have them run at me full charge. And a friend told a story once of how she killed a spider and all it's babies jumped off its back and scattered. If that happened I'd have to burn my house and move. And then I might have a real phobia.
 I do pin spiders under cups though. And then I leave those cups. For days. Weeks. Months. I would leave them for years but someone braver than me always deals with the spider under the cup. 
 I usually pin small spiders though. With big ones I pack my bags and move to a new state. (And you thought I moved for the sake of new scenery.) 
 In California there are monster spiders in the warm places. At least I assume they have monster spiders. I don't plan to go crawl through the forests in search of them. Up here though, where I live, they have bitty spiders. The kind I still am creeped out by but which I can pin under cups - and then call brave friends to come and deal with for me.
 Except all their spiders aren't bitty.
 I didn't know this.
 I didn't know they had monster spiders from the Depths of Mount Doom.
 I didn't find this out until the end of summer when I saw one lounging in my bathroom.
 I can't really explain these spiders. All I know is they are BIG. And UGLY. And EVIL. Of course, everyone here claims they don't bite, but that doesn't matter. They are black, HUGE, EVIL, and they look like a beetle from the Depths of Mount Doom. An EVIL beetle who has lost all the endearing qualities of beetles. 
 At least I think they look something like beetles.
 You see, when I saw him in my bathroom this summer I ran as fast as I could and didn't stop to get a good look. I don't stop to study Monster Spiders. They aren't like pinable ones. They charge. They likely have babies on their backs. And I KNOW they have buddies lurking in my boots. (Reason 105 why I go barefoot.)
 Later when I returned to my bathroom he had gone. I hoped he had moved on, gone out into the nice summer weather. Gone on holiday. Went to the nude beach. Visited the Golden Gate Bridge. Done exciting things with is life rather than camp out in my bathroom.
 I didn't think much on home over the past few months. Winter came. I love winter. Snow. Cold. SPIDERS DEAD AND NOT STALKERY!
 (He was laughing at me. I know it now.)
 Last night I went into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I casually scanned the walls and then I ninja jumped backwards and into my bed.
 There. On the wall. BLACK AS THE NIGHT! UGLY AND EVIL AND BIG, sat the Monster Spider from the Depths of Mount Doom.
 I panicked. After all, there was NO WAY I could pin a Monster Spider from the Depths of Mount Doom on my wall! I would have to move the cup after I'd pinned him. I wasn't sure I had a cup large enough and his legs might stick out. And he was SO UGLY AND HORRIBLE I couldn't even look at him long enough to pin him.
 But I really needed to use my bathroom.
 I honestly came close to burning the house down. Or going to the store to use their bathroom. Or calling one of my friends to ask them to come and save me.
 Instead I bravely hid on my bed and stared at the floor to see if he had decided to come out and creep to my bed.
 Then I got mad. How DARE he camp out in my house for so long?! Didn't he know it was WINTER!? Why hadn't he DIED ALREADY?!
 I got mad enough that, had he not been the horrible UGLY, EVIL, and MONSTER spiders, I'd have stabbed him with a sword.
 Except I didn't want a Monster Spider from the Depths of Mount Doom splattered on my wall.
 Later he vanished again. But this leaves me with a problem.
 He is still in my flat. 
 On the loose.
 EVIL
 BLACK AS NIGHT
 UGLY
 And HORRIBLE.
 And I can't burn a rental flat down. Something about that deposit thing. 
 But for the record, I'm still a fabulous Ninja.
 I think I might turn the heat off. Freeze the Monster out of the flat. Then he can go and DIE in the snow.
 I might freeze myself, but I will freeze happy.
 That is all. If I am soon homeless you know why.
 I leave you with a Psych quote.

"Now give me your keys so I can storm out of here."

 I picked today's song last minute. I was going to do one which inspires me while I write Brothers-in-Arms, because I have news with that book.
 I picked one by Peter Hollens instead, because I like the song and his voice makes it amazing. Also, while it isn't one I typically listen to while I write, it still has that same kind of heart wrenching-ness I like to listen to while I work on my heart wrenching book.

 Enjoy. I leave you with another Psych quote.