Emily Cook's Blog, page 58

Rest. Day four. Food quirks.

Unhurried I notice strange things about myself.

Here on vacation, we eat when we are hungry, and it's not as often as I would have guessed had I planned our meals.

I eat more often at home, and here are a few reasons why:

THEY require three meals a day and snacks, and it's my job to make that happen. If I'm going to be handling food all the time I might as well have some.

I eat when they are hungry. Why not?

I eat when they are NOT hungry any more. How can I let this food go to waste?

I eat because I have a spare 30 seconds and I know that eventually I will get hungry, even if I'm not now.  Who knows if I'll have time to eat when that happens? Better get the eating done while I can! And quick, before they see me!

I eat because my life is crazy, and it's something fun to do if I find myself in a moment when nobody needs me.

I eat to comfort myself, as a way of having "me" time for a second in the middle of a hectic day, as a way of filling myself up with whatever THEY are sucking out of me.

Funny thing:  Food doesn't fill me up with patience or energy, not when I eat too much, and not when I eat junk.  Food is a gift, intended for my good, but I often use it to my own harm.

I need a better relationship with food.
(After vacation of course.)
If you'd like to join me, join the group I joined: Dakota Pam's SparkTeam
I'll see you there. (Next week, of course. Orlando is not hte place to practice a healthy eating plan!)

Tell me, do you eat for reasons other than hunger?

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Rest: Day Three. Pouring out and filling up

In returning and in rest shall be your strength.


I sit beside still waters and He restores my soul.There is much to be done, but even so, I am invited to rest.I am not the glue that holds the world together. I can step off the treadmill, away from the endless lists. The schedules, meals, details are set aside, and my mind finds space for looking at the bigger picture. 
I get weary being the mastermind of the house all the time. I plan the meals, activities, chores.I enforce the bedtime and oversee the clean up.  When I am away from this, I eat less, I hurry less, and I don't want to make decisions. "We can eat whenever you want to eat, hon." "I don't care what we do, what do you feel like?" 
What do I feel like? I feel like being led. I feel like floating along while someone else takes charge. I feel the weight of the running and the planning lifted off of me and I breathe deeply.
Yet there are weights that cannot be shaken off, and I don't even try.  Those things I run from or ignore in the busy-ness bubble up to the surface and demand attention, even here beside the pool: my fears and worries and hurts and needs,they come pouring out even as I rest,
but even this is rest, because they pour out with him, and on to Him.

Rest, day two. Resting from success.

"We are called upon not to be successful, but to be faithful."
And I see in my heart too many cares about "success." I care about book sales and blog stats, and I allow happiness or discouragement to flow from those numbers, as if they were my judge.
To be faithful to my vocations, and not to be sidetracked by "success," as Mother Teresa said, and lived. I learned only this week that her real name was Agnes. 
Oh Agnes, my Aggie who cares nothing for success but who teaches me to be faithful, simply by living full of faith and love. God's love pours down on that dear child, and she takes it up with joy and passes it out freely to anyone around her with open hands. 
Fill me up Lord, this week with rest, and Your Truth, and Your Solid Love; that it my pour out generously on those around me. Make me faithful. Amen.


----------And hear us, O world, who would commend or condemn, So quick to throw flowers or stones,We have never sought what you acclaimNor shunned what you are accustomed to defame,You saw us fasting,Each perpared to make the final sacrifice--When we, the wanderers lay down for the rest eternal,Give others great names,call us the faithful.
Erik Axel Karlfeldt(as quoted in The Knights of Rhodes by Bo Giertz )

Rest. Day one.

It is so hard for me to leave the children.

Before we left the child who aches for me the most needed one more hug. "Dont want you go mommy." He buried hisface in my neck. His arms around me, we fell on to the couch and I hugged him back, patting him and breathing him in. I felt his weight on me, his love of me pressing down into my heart.  But daddy was waiting for me in the car.  We had to get up.  Another boys lip quivered as he realized he forgot to show me his latest monkey  bar trick and could he please please do it for me before we go? But daddy waits in the car, so I told him to practice hard and hecould show me it all when we get back home.
I close my eyes and I still feel little one's arms around my neck.
Adele sings us through the mountains, and they make me feel wonderfully small.
We drove all night and I wonder did he play that music on purpose, the kind that reminds me of college and falling in love with him?  Because I am remembering in floods.  I slept in and out of memories and dreams.
We walk on the beach and the sand feels like confectioners sugar between my toes. I want to tell the kids about it, and then I think I should let them play in confectioners sugar when we get home.
We hold hands as we wallk. He wants to find a crab, and he does and I take a picture. I want to tell the kids about that too.
How strange it is, I remark, that we look like two normal people in this place. Just two people holding hands on the beach.

We don't loook like weirdos with six kids. It's like our fun little secret.  I am enjoying a break from the odd looks, but I still feel like a mama duck missing my little ducks.
He collected shells here with his grandma when he was little and tells me about the time they left them in the hot car and it smelled so bad they all almost got sick.  If we do it with the kids, we will bring some bleach we agree, and I say adulthood is lame.
He issues a command for feet and shoe cleaning, and I submit, but i get sand in his car anyway. I try not to think it is funny. He shakes his head, patient with his child-wife.
We say goodnight to little ones by phone, and I miss their arms.
But his arms are nice, too.

Do Daddy and Mommy BOTH know stuff? A story for kids

Do Daddy and Mommy BOTH know stuff?
(This story was inspired by Seth, who really didn't know.)

"Hey mom, why do we put gas in the car?" asked the boy.
"Because the van needs gas if we want it to go," replied mom.

"Why? How does gas make the van go?"

"Well… why don't you ask your daddy about that, honey."

 

"Mom, can you fix my transformer?"

"That's a better job for your daddy," said mom.

 

"Mom, how does our email know the way to grandma's computer?"

"The internet takes it there, son."
"How does the internet work?"

"Um… I think it's magic."

"No mom, really, I need to know HOW it works!"

"That's a daddy question, honey."

 

"Mom, when is the laundry going to be done?" asked the boy. Then he stopped, saying "Oh nevermind, I forgot. Only daddies know stuff. Not mommies."

 

Mom stopped ironing and looked at her son. "Now wait just a minute, son! Let's talk about this!"

 

Mom sat down on the couch with the boy.

"Mommies and daddies both know stuff. Daddy knows more than I do about cars and computers and things like that. But mommy knows lots of important things, too!"

"Oh really? Like what?" the boy was skeptical.

"Well…" mom thought for a minute.

"Remember when you were nervous to start school? Mommy knew how to help you through that first day."

"I remember that! You prayed for me and wrote notes in my lunch!  Now, I love school!"

"And who knows how you like your hamburgers, and your pancakes? And who knows what kind of cereal to buy and what size socks you wear?"

"You do mommy." The boy smiled.

"When you get scared at night, what happens?"

"Daddy tells me to go back to bed."

"And sometimes mommy comes into your room for hugs and prayers, right?"

"Right. I like it when you do that. "

The boy hugged his mother and smiled, "I think I get it mom.

Daddy knows how to make things work, and mommy knows how to help things grow."

 

"That's a good way to put it son.

We make a good team, don't we?"

. . . . . .

( characters in this story may appear wiser than they actually are)

Using Art to Bless Your Family

I love when the kids pick wild flowers from the yard and bring them in to me. They give me a gift, that cost them nothing other than the time to pick it, and they are thanked for it. And rightly so: they noticed the beauty around them, they gathered it, and they couldn’t help to share it with me.

In my imagination, I do something just like that when I write.I see something beautiful or funny or important, I gather it up in words, and I share it with you. I love doing this thing, here on this blog, for my friends and for strangers.
It’s my hobby, my “other vocation,” my way of recharging and resting my mommy muscles for awhile. There is nothing wrong with this, but today, I am asking myself this question:
How can I use my art to serve my family?
And that’s one of those questions I ask myself and the ideas flood and I think I need to write for days just to get them all stamped down on the page before I get distracted with something else!
I won’t do that, but I will start a blog series so that I think on these things with you once a week. I am dedicating fridays to family-focused art. I’ll be dusting off the writing assignment the girls gave me (Sara and Clara) and I’ll be blogging about using creative energies in the home.
I’ll try my hand at children’s stories, and I’ll show you some of them, too. (Come back tomorrow!) I’d appreciate your thoughtful feedback. If you’d like to use them for experimenting on your own children, I’d love to hear what they think as well. These little people in my house are great story-testers, but I’m not sure they would tell me if my story was boring.
I would love to hear from you as well: how do you use your art to bless your family? Do you write to record memories? Do you garden, scrapbook, bake, craft, sew, or host parties? (Link up and guest posting opportunities coming soon!)
Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord;  and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.1 Corinthians 12:4-7

I've Got Issues!

I was on the radio this week!  It was my first radio interview about the book, so I was a little nervous.  I liked that I did not have to put on make-up for this interview.  I do wish I could edit my audio efforts like I can edit my writing.  All in all, it was a good experience.

If you'd like to listen, please click here: Emily Cook on Issues, Etc.
If I did it again, I would have answered one question differently:
Todd Wilken asked, "What do you have to say to those of us who know someone who might be suffering like this?"
I had expected him to ask me what I'd say to someone who was going through a trial themselves, so I got thinking on that answer and talking about it before I realized my mistake! If I could do it again, I'd say this.

Issues, Etc.
Serving theological meat and potatoes to all who have ears to hear

While you're over there at Issues, Etc., download a few more podcasts, or subscribe like I do. Todd and his guests make great company on the treadmill.  They often feed my mind and spirit as my hands do housework.

Here are a few of my all-time favorites:

Parables: The Lost Coin and the Prodigal Son with Ken Bailey
The hymn "I Bind unto Myself Today" With Pastor William Weedon
The hymn "Abide with Me" with Dr. Just
Discerning the Will of God Jeremy Rhode

For me, listening helps me remember my most important job as a Christian:

Receive.

Receive the gifts of God in His Word, Sacraments and through His body the church.
Receive, trust, and be loved.

Do you ever receive your spiritual food through your ears?

Read, Pray, and Hug Before You Click

In the summer:
Kids get themselves up sometime before seven, big kids put on TV, and they loaf around in PJs.  I get up when I'm ready (or when the baby is stinky and hollerin' beside my bed.)  I make coffee, check email, and ease into the morning. I make breakfast for them when I am good n' ready.

Ahhhh.

During the school year:
I get up when they do (I know, some people say you should get up earlier than your kids, but they always hear the coffeepot, so what's the point?)  We jump out of bed and into our shoes. We plow through our morning jobs, and we get everyone together in time for school.
They talk and fight over the cereal box and I pester them to eat two more bites.  We hunt for the hairbrush and I check my email real quick while they are chewing.  I change the baby and pack the snacks and shoo them out the door because they're almost late.

And they leave, dressed and fed, but what have we forgotten? Did we hug? Did we pray? Did I look in their eyes or say a kind word to them?

I don't know. We probably forgot. I probably got sidetracked.
I could say I am too task-oriented.
I could also say I am too me-oriented.

Both things are true.  The way I gravitate towards my internet fix in the morning is just another symptom of me putting me first.

I don't want to send them to school with empty stomachs.
They need food.
They need mommy-love.
They need the Word of God.




Read the Bible- for me and for the children.
(Alternatively, let the Ipod do the reading while we eat.)

Pray- for myself and with the children.
We say Luther's Morning Prayer on the porch before they leave.

Hug- Greet the kids with affection when you first see them in the morning and before they leave for the day. Look into their eyes and speak kind words.


I have again given the kids permission to hold me accountable here. (Aggie loves her other nagging license. If you need someone to hold you accountable, just ask Aggie.)

No clicking until these things are done, and no clicking until the big kids are gone to school.
I want my children to grow up thinking this is normal:

It's normal for mom to listen to me.
It's normal for me to work in the morning.
It's normal for me to pray with my mom every day.
It's normal to be loved and hugged.
It's normal to hear God's Word every day.

May God be with us in this new normal,and grow us in love for Him and each other.

Luther’s Morning  Prayer
I thank you, my heavenly Father, through Jesus Christ, your dear Son, that you have kept me this
night from all harm and danger. Keep me this day also from sin and every evil, that all my
doings and life may please you. Into your hands I commend my body and soul and all things. Let
your holy angel be with me, that the wicked foe may have no power over me. Amen.

Do you get distracted by technology or other things in the morning?What do you want your  "normal" morning to look like?

Letter to the teachers at the beginning of a new school year

Dear teachers, principals, and all who work with children,
As we begin a new school year,
These children who come to you have grown another year, and they continue with a steady march toward adulthood. Your classroom is their next stop. They come with their peers, and they sit in desks with eyes on you.
You may have piles of things still disorganized, you may not feel ready, you may not BE ready, but they come.
You have made room in your classroom and in your heart for this new set of children, and you are preparing to feed them and fill them and teach them.
These students will wear you out; they will try your patience; and they will frustrate you. They will push you and poke you and sin against you. They will learn from you and take from you and they will need more than you can give them.
They will need more than you can give them.Remember this now, at the beginning of the year. They need you to be their teacher, and they need God to be their God.
Our Father, who knit you together, has equipped and gifted you to do this job that is before you. May He use your hands to bless these children. May He use your voice to teach His wisdom. May He use your heart of compassion to teach them love. May He use your strength and determination to teach them His ways even in discipline and failure. May He strengthen their faith by His Word from your lips.
May He fill you up with all that you need to do this enormous job. As you teach the children of His love for them, may He remind you that the same constant love applies to you. May His love for you in Christ continually refresh you and sustain you in the coming year. May He provide help when you need it, rest when you need it, and grace always.
God enable you both to will and to do this faithful work.
From one of many parents who are praying for you,
Emily Cook


www.weakandloved.com


-------Parents, remember to pray for your child's teachers!Consider sending them a word of encouragement as they start the school year!
Feel free to use/modify this letter if you like!

Challenges and joys at the beginning of a new school year

It's time to start a new school year, and this always makes me reflective.  I see how each child has grown, and I remember that there is no anchor for the seasons of life.
I rejoice with them, and I sigh a little for myself.  Go on, little ones, and spread your wings wide.  May God hold you close!
Father, be that refuge for them that I would like to be.  (Pray this prayer with me!)

[image error] photo by Shalinee Kohli Murishwar, India

Shalinee is a friend of mine from India. We met in the epilepsy forums. Her dear son continues to suffer daily seizures. Please keep him and all with epilepsy in your prayers.  
Shalinee's son is an inspiration to his mother, as she explains:“I've learned to chase what I enjoy just by watching our son do so through his innumerable seizures! He is my inspiration; he never gives up! Not a day passes by without a fall, a bump, a challenge but he lifts himself and gets back to his play and friends.....and I thank God for this illumination in my life- for helping me learn through this phase.“  Follow Shalinee on instagram


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Tsn't Shalinee's photo great!?

What challenges are you facing as school starts this year?