Stephanie Verni's Blog, page 7

A Nutty Story as a Metaphor for Life

Two weeks ago, I couldn’t see straight, and I got tied up in knots about something. So let’s start at the beginning and make it really quick.

Two years ago, in an effort to make our front lawn look as good as possible, we decided to have the lawn replaced and sodded. The sodding looked great, and it was refreshing to see a front lawn free of weeds and the dreaded nutsedge that had enveloped our lawn for several years.

Nutsedge is a nuisance. If you don’t know what it is, it looks like long pieces of grass, but thicker, that grow above and beyond your normal grass. It sticks up and makes the lawn look unkempt. The worst part is, it takes over the lawn and multiplies faster than rabbits.

We had called our lawn maintenance company to come out and take care of said nutsedge that began to grow into our beautiful sodded lawn. When they were taking too long to respond, I got out there, like a crazed woman, and pulled every damn piece of nutsedge from the front lawn. (Why didn’t I just spray it, you ask? Well, because last time we did it, we killed the nutsedge and a lot of the grass as well, so I was leery.)

Frenzied, I pulled and pulled until I had a bag full of the enemy and a sore back and knees.

The next day, the lawn maintenance company showed up.

As I look back on that moment when I couldn’t take it anymore and sweat my brains out pulling the nutsedge blade by blade, I have to laugh now. I must have looked absolutely ridiculous. As well, I have to relate it to the life lesson I learned.

It’s pretty simple.

If the nutsedge is a metaphor for life, it’s that we can’t let things have power over us. Things get sorted in the end, so there’s no sense in wasting hours of your life frantically trying to fix it at the moment. Sometimes things get resolved in their own time.

Likewise, don’t let your little problems consume you.

That, my friends, is the lesson I learned, as I practically killed myself pulling freaking nutsedge in 94 degree weather.

The Annual Birthday Post: You Can’t Teach an Old Dog New Tricks. Or Can You?

Another year older, and a lot has changed.

And so another birthday has landed on my doorstep. I’m sitting here staring at the empty page, trying to come up with something clever and snarky to write for my annual birthday blog post.

The cursor blinks. I curse it.

Wait.

Something has come to me. A retrospective of sorts.

Since last year’s birthday, a lot has happened. Let me attempt to recount the changes that have occurred in our lives over the past year without boring you to death.

1—I underwent hip replacement surgery two weeks after my birthday last year. It’s been a year-long road to recovery. Initially, while I was healing, my SI-joint went out of whack, so recovery was endless, painful, and not how I had imagined it would be. In plain English, it sucked.

2—Our son graduated from college in May, secured a full-time job, and is living in Eastport in Annapolis. Empty Nest Syndrome 1 has set in. Who is ever entirely ready for this?

3—Our daughter is moving back to college for her junior year but will be living in an apartment off campus. She, as well, will no longer be at home, and Empty Nest Syndrome 2 has taken hold. A double whammy.

4—After much deliberation, soul-searching, and discussions with my husband, I decided to step back from my full-time faculty role at the university and roll into part-time adjunct teaching in the university’s online programs. After 30 years of teaching, I look forward to continuing doing what I love, just at a different pace.

Everyone always tells you how fast time will go, how in the blink of an eye, your kids will be grown, they will be self-sufficient, and you’ll have more time to do the things you’ve always wanted to do.

Likewise, as someone who withstood the sometimes maddening frenzy and pace of the last 22 years—of raising kids and putting their schedules first, of working a demanding work schedule, of trying to keep the house in order, of visiting loved ones, of writing on the side, and of volunteering when I could—I’m now looking forward to a different way of life. Of doing more things that I want to do on my timetable as the days behind me outnumber, most likely, the days in front of me.

That’s not snarky. At my age, it’s just true.

I look at my bookshelves and realize I have a lot to read. There are lists of shows and movies I want to watch. I look at my thighs and waistline and know I have a lot of walking to do to get those suckers in shape. I look at my house and sigh, knowing that after nine years here, there are some interior projects that need to be tackled. I relish my calendar with fewer meetings and bookings, and I’m thankful I have more time to spend with my parents, children, and friends.

As I was lamenting this new way of life, my mother shared something a fellow colleague said to her when she had retired after 30 years of teaching middle school. He said, “Remember—you are not retiring from something. You are retiring to something.”

I’m adopting this mantra as my own.

So often, especially here in the United States, we glorify the notion of “being busy.” We relish telling our friends we can’t meet up because we’re busy. We make apologies that we can’t attend functions because we’re just so damn busy. Busy, busy, busy. All the time, time, time.

I’ve been there, believe me.

Now, I’m looking forward to being more…free, free, free.

My husband and I have always said that when retirement fully comes down the road that we will never be at a loss for things to do. We have a lot of interests. We like to do a lot of different things. We look forward to traveling, boating, attending sports events and concerts, reading, visiting with friends and family, and trying every waterfront restaurant we can find.

Yes.

More, more, more, of that, that, that.

Birthdays make you reflect this way, you see. They force you to examine the past and look toward the future. What will the next year be like?

I honestly have no idea. It seems I’ll have to take it as it comes.

I’m certainly fortunate to be able to say I’ve worked hard since I was 14 years old when I took that full-time babysitting job from 7:30 a.m. until 4 p.m.every single day in the summer. Over the many years since then, I have worked at various jobs tirelessly, and even now, in my semi-retirement, I’m still going to teach and write part time.

And yet, I’m still able to get a little taste of what it might be like when retirement comes full throttle.

They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. It may be true. Sometimes the old dog has to ease into things.

Do You Google While You Watch? And other thoughts…

I was thinking about the shows that my husband and I tend to watch on television. Most of them require me to Google while I watch, meaning they are typically rooted in some sort of reality or history, and we’re often pausing the television as we search to see how much of it is true.

Do you do this, too?

The benefit of online access is that we can check dates, facts, people’s names and histories, etc. The problem is, we need to know which credible sources we can turn to in times of our curiosity and which ones are accurate. One of the things I’ve prided myself on all these years as a professor is sharing with students the wonderful capacity to be lifelong learners and to never lose that sense of being curious—of wanting to know more.

I remember watching the Showtime series The Tudors and frantically looking things up after each episode. I’ve always been fascinated with British history and Henry VIII tops the list. Of course, the creators and writers of the show take liberties with the “facts as they know them,” but I have to say, in terms of the historical timeline, everything was spot on. British shows like Atlantic Crossing, The English Game, and Ridley Road have forced my husband and me to become historical researchers, just so we can learn more about that time period and the facts surrounding it. Even the show Call the Midwife has me looking up diseases and trends in history.

Which shows do you watch that cause you to do the same? I would love to know, and we also welcome recommendations.

Book Launch Update

As we approach Week 3 of the publication of The Letters in the Books, I’m pleased to report it’s been a very good launch, mostly thanks to you all and your wonderful support of the novel. I’ve been talking about writing and the process or writing and publishing on Instagram since I set up my account, and it’s been wonderful to see people help me get the word out about the novel.

Many of you know it took me two and a half years to write, edit, and produce that novel. The time and energy I spent on it even warranted a comment from my husband who said this: “You’ve taken so much time on this particular book. Why?” Well, I can answer that. I want to put out a good product, and I want readers to enjoy the story. If it takes me a long time to get it the way I want it, so be it.

I’ve been trying to market the book with Instagram and TikTok videos, background information about the novel and its setting of Annapolis, and tidbits about the novel’s characters and their backstories.

Additionally, our local bookstore here in town is selling the books with handwritten letters I penned tucked inside them. It’s been kind of fun, honestly, to promote this book! If you’re looking for a copy to read, check Amazon.com, BN.com, or Park Books in Severna Park in person or online.

House of the Dragon

Those of you who have followed me for a while know that I was obsessed with, an unlikely match, for sure, since I’m not a big action/adventure/fantasy fan. But Game of Thrones won me over with its interesting, unpredictable, and often maniacal characters. They were fascinating to dissect episode after episode. So, as you can imagine, I, along with millions of other fans, are highly anticipating the prequel that arrives August 21 called The House of the Dragon. Anyone else chomping at the bit for this one?

How ‘Bout ‘Dem O’s, Hon?

Baltimore Orioles fans, come one, admit it. This year is fun! It’s been exciting to see the team surprise us with nail-biters and big wins! I’ve been to a lot of games this year (and am going tomorrow night, too), and the energy in the ballpark reminds me of the good old days. If you haven’t been to a game in person, you’re missing out. Plus, the post-game concert series and fireworks nights are well worth it! As a former employee and someone who is married to someone who works there now, things are looking up—it’s a ton of fun in Birdland. They’ve kept us on our toes as we watch the rebuilding in process. Additionally, a group of us who all worked together will be gathering in September to celebrate the 30th Anniversary of Camden Yards. I’m looking forward to seeing everyone at the reunion!

That’s all for now, folks! Have a greet weekend and upcoming week!

Stephanie

____________________

STEPHANIE VERNI is the author of THE LETTERS IN THE BOOKS; FROM HUMBUG TO HUMBLE: THE TRANSFORMATION OF EBENEZER SCROOGE; BENEATH THE MIMOSA TREE; INN SIGNIFICANT; LITTLE MILESTONES; THE POSTCARD; and ANNA IN TUSCANY. She is also a co-author of the textbook, EVENT PLANNING: COMMUNICATING THEORY & PRACTICE. Currently an adjunct professor at Stevenson University Online, she instructs communication courses for undergraduate and graduate students. She and her husband reside in Severna Park, Maryland, and have two children. On the side, she enjoys writing travel articles for marylandroadtrips.com.

Book Reviews Are Coming In: Here’s what readers are saying

I can’t thank my friends, family, and readers enough for all the help you’ve given me to spread the word about The Letters in the Books. The two and a half years I’ve spent working on this novel is paying off for me personally, simply by seeing the support you have given me this past week. I’m touched, humbled, and so glad the book is now in your hands.

Below, I’m sharing a little about the novel and some of the early reviews that have come in.

Since people are always asking me how they can help, here are three ways you can help independent authors:

1- Talk the book up with friends, family, and fellow readers

2-Share the book on social media

3-Post a book review on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Goodreads

I’m blessed to have you all in my life, and I thank you for all that you do for me.

xx,

Stephanie

The Letters in the Books is available via Amazon.com, BN.com, or at Park Books in Severna Park, where you just may receive a letter of your own.

If your book club is interested in reading this book, feel free to contact Stephanie to book her for an in-person book club if you are local, or a virtual book club. She may be reached at stephanie.verni@gmail.com. Thank you.

Holding strong one week later at #12 in Contemporary Literature and Fiction

Thank You All!!!

Thank you all so much!

Yesterday, I shared these videos on social media. We had a great book launch, and the novel reached number 9 in “hot new releases” on Amazon in the contemporary fiction category. I am just thrilled!

Thank you to everyone who helped me launch this book, including my ARC readers and social media pals. My Facebook friends were tremendous! I’m so appreciative! Thank you for playing a part in getting The Letters in the Books into readers’ hands.

The Launch VideoA little snippet – We started and #45 and went to #9 last night! I am floored!

Book Launch! The Letters in the Books Now Available

So excited to share this story with you!

Good morning, sunshines! I have been waiting for weeks to be able to say that The Letters in the Books is now available. It’s also probably fair to say that I worked harder on this book than any of the previous ones. After two and a half years, I can finally say this project is done. Writing from the perspectives of five main characters–two men and three women–was cumbersome and a lot of fun. Setting the novel in Annapolis once again was a thrill.

I can honestly say I don’t do this for the money, for any recognition, or for any other reason except that it fills a creative niche I have. I enjoy the whole storytelling process, even when it can be exhausting. Anyway, that said, today we launch. Today, I can finally say this novel is out of my hands and into yours, if you are willing.

I hope it brings you as much joy as it has brought me. If there’s one thing I won’t ever stop writing about, it’s the idea that without hope, we are truly lost. These characters are dear to me. There’s a little bit of me in all of them…and it touches on themes of empathy, guilt, shame, forgiveness, and vulnerability. It’s also a tribute to what true friendship is all about.

Thank you for allowing me this opportunity to share my work with you. Let me know what you think. xx

Here’s the link for Amazon. Also available on Barnes & Noble. If you live in the Annapolis/Severna Park area, copies will be available at Park Books & LitColab on Wednesday.

Thank you, as always, for your continued support of my writing journey. Read below for a synopsis of the book.

The Smell of Coffee in the Morning

Last week, I was in my bathroom and could smell the scent of coffee wafting through the house, through the vents. My son was home, spending his last week as a “kid” in our home before he moved into his new grown-up apartment in Annapolis, and he had made his cup of coffee. He and I are the only coffee drinkers in the house. I’ll miss that scent—and him—when he’s gone.

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They say the sense of smell takes you back in time faster than any of the other senses. I know it’s true. It happens to me all the time. How about you?

Moreover, I often associate the smell of coffee to being a young kid, before I even liked coffee. That smell will forever remind me of staying at my grandparents’ home in Cedar Grove, New Jersey. Waking up to the smell of coffee meant family—it meant spending time with family. My grandparents would brew their coffee early, and it would permeate the house. And while it was my grandparents’ house, I never felt as if it weren’t mine, too. We were always welcomed and invited to treat their home as our home every time we visited, sometimes staying for weeks.

I’m grateful that my senses allow me the opportunity to reflect on the past, and to remember it fondly. I never want to forget those days—of spending time with my grandparents, my aunts, my cousins, and my own family. It takes me back to leisurely breakfasts spent talking about all sorts of things, of laughter, and of being with people who have long passed.

I miss those days, too.

One Week to the Publication of The Letters in the Books

Dear Eva, Lily, Reid, Dimitri, and Meg,

It seems our time together has come to an end. The five of you have been living inside my head for more than two years now. It’s been a wonderful journey, but I’m afraid it’s time to let you go.

As the world is spinning out of control and there are a lot of horrible things happening out there, it was a pleasure to tell this story and remind people that there is goodness out there, and that people have the capacity to choose the path to kindness.

I will not soon forget the time we have spent together. But all good things must come to an end, and now our little story is to be shared when we publish next week.

And to Annapolis—I take a lot of pride in setting our books in our lovely capital. Here I sat yesterday making the final revisions for the millionth time. I hope I have depicted our charming city in the best possible light.

Be well, my dear characters. I hope someday you find this letter in your book.

With love,

Stephanie

Proofing for the millionth time. Finished last night at 8 p.m.

How Brene Brown’s research influenced my novel

Over the last few years, I’ve become enamored with Brené Brown’s research, specifically with regard to empathy, vulnerability, and shame. On campus, I’ve executed workshops about Brown’s wonderful book, Dare to Lead. If you haven’t read this book, I strongly urge you hop to it. It’s a wonderful dissection about daring leadership, and what factors play into what kind of leaders we admire and what kind of leader we, ourselves, want to be.

In the course of preparing to teach others about Brown’s findings, many of her assessments were illuminating, and as I began to figure out what my next novel was going to tackle, I landed on all three of those things, with empathy at the heart of it.

The premise of the novel is simple: It’s about a young bookstore owner named Meg who wants to put something good out in the world, and so she writes 10 letters a day that she tucks inside customers’ books, specifically inside books of those she believes need a sort of “pick me up.” Inspired by a letter she received herself, she ends up carrying on a tradition and bringing people together, namely the four other characters in the book, Eva, Lily, Reid, and Dimitri.

I’ve loved using what I’ve learned to help write this story. As well, I read a book about empaths that gave me a deeper understanding of what one is, and Meg is certainly an empath.

While it’s a story about triumphing and leaving the past behind, it’s also a story of friendship, love, and understanding. Once again, the novel is set in my hometown of Annapolis, Maryland, and I did my best to bring it to life for those who have never visited, and to make it feel like home to those who know it well.

We’re two weeks to launch, and I’m so excited to share this two-year project with you. I really hope you like and and that you’ll take the journey with me.

xx,

Stephanie

Iberostar Grand Bavaro: A Truly Memorable Place

Close your eyes and imagine a place filled with sunshine, palm trees, and a stiff breeze off the ocean. Imagine an elegant and meticulously kept resort replete with a slew of activities, and you’ll find yourself at the Iberostar Grand Bavaro Resort in the Dominican Republic (DR).

It was a like a dream come true.

Allow me to tell you why.

Let me count the ways…

One—from Baltimore, we were lucky to have a direct flight to the DR. These days, with flight cancellations abounding, it was nice to know that in under four hours we would arrive. Once the plane touched down, it was relatively easy to find a driver who took us to the resort. While ours was little nutty, we soon found ourselves standing in front of a magnificent resort that took our breath away upon arrival.

Two—The Iberostar Grand Bavaro is an all-inclusive resort. As a family, we had never been to an all-inclusive before (I had been to one in Jamaica with my family for my high school graduation, and it was a ton of fun!) Therefore, at an all-inclusive, there is an abundance of food, and the resort featured seven places to eat, including restaurants and outdoor eateries. My favorite spot was having breakfast on the open covered porch that overlooks the Caribbean Sea. There was a lovely breeze coming off the ocean, and it was a delightful place to have your morning fare.

Three—The rooms are a wonderful size, and the bathroom is large as well. In each room there is a bed (or two beds, depending on the room), a lounger, and a table with chairs and enough room to eat in the room if you wish. The bathroom is spacious with a soaking tub and a separate shower with views of the resort. The balcony is a good size; ours looked out over the resort, and it was stunning both day and night.

Four—The Dominican people are friendly and like to have fun. Their sense of humor shines, and their fun-loving outlook on life was contagious. We bonded with the staff, learned a little about each of them, and partied with them, too, especially the activities staff. They always warmly greeted you with a smile or a fist bump, or by simply say, “Hola, ma family.”

Five—The activities staff made our trip memorable. When you go to an all-inclusive, there are numerous activities scheduled throughout the day. It is your choice whether to participate or not. We downloaded the activities app to see exactly what was happening all day long. From aqua bike in the pool, to archery near a hut, to dance lessons twice a day, to Bingo by the pool, to a beach party and dancing under the stars, the activities made our stay even more special. At night, there were shows in the indoor theatre, and the activities folks were there, seating guests and making sure they had a good time. Afterwards, there was dancing in the Lobby Bar area, a very elegant space for all kinds of music and dancing. To cap off the night, we ended up in the pirate ship they fondly called “The Boat,” where you descended into the ship that looked like a ship on the inside and featured a bar, deejay, and dance floor. We danced until we closed it down at 1 a.m. Our activities leaders—Maria, Gucci, Black Pearl, Black Mamba, and Travis Scott, among others (yes, some of them have nicknames, so cute!)—were on the dance floor with us in The Boat.

Six—The beach is gorgeous, with white sand and covered cabanas. I was in the DR for a week and did not get sunburned, but I did get some sun. The covered huts on the beach were so awesome, and you could lounge under the hut or in the sun—your choice. Tobias was our beach server, and we got to know him over the course of the week. He loves Superheroes, and he talked to Anthony and Matt about his favorite movies. We enjoyed the Miami Vice drink, a blend of Pina Colada with Strawberry Daiquiri.

Seven—The Pool(s). There are three pools at the resort. One is enormous with a swim up bar. One is a little quieter, and one is used for pool activities, such as volleyball and exercise class. The pool has covered cabanas and loungers, as well as lounge chairs in the water. Two hot tubs are on site, as well. I loved swimming in the pool in the late afternoon, having a drink, and relaxing before dinner.

Eight—Each floor in the resort has Butler service, and your Butler makes your dinner reservations and tends to any needs or requests you may have. Our two Butlers, Dalwel and Staling, were fantastic, and helped us get settled and offered an overview of the place and its activities. They periodically checked on us to see if there was anything we needed.

Nine—Because the resort is incredibly friendly, and because we participated in so many activities, we ended up meeting a lot of people from all over the world. We especially loved hanging out with Deedra and Kevin Norwood from Texas and the Fawcett family (Joanne, Darren, Alex and Lawrence) from York in England. We did a lot of dancing with these folks, both in dance lessons, in the lobby bar, and on The Boat.

Ten—The resort’s beauty is difficult to deny. It is elegant, regal, and welcoming at the same time. Every aspect of the resort is tended to beautifully. When you wake in the morning, you don’t have to look far to see the care and pride the resort takes in making it a special place for visitors. Every floor is polished; every chair is tended to; every person says “hola” and greets you warmly; every space throughout the resort is meticulously tended to. Our view from our room looked out over the entire resort to the water. I’m sharing the video I posted on TikTok below.

When Ellie graduated from high school two years ago before the pandemic, we had saved up for her graduation trip, just as we did with Matthew and our two weeks in California. She wanted a beach vacation, and so we delivered a beach vacation (two years late because of restrictions, etc., but we got it in!) The only problem with the trip was, once you have a beach vacation like this, it’s going to be hard to top it. But the good thing is, we have fun no matter where we go and what we do.

That said, I’m glad this vacation and celebration will be memorable for a lifetime for Ellie.

For more about Stephanie and her books and travels, you can find her at stephanieverniwrites on Instagram.