Riley Murphy's Blog, page 30
August 3, 2013
THE LIFE OF RILEY
Okay, I don’t usually do bathroom humor, as a rule because I figure it’s guy’s territory, but in this case I’m making an exception.
First of all, I have to explain that my master bath has triple glass sliders that lead out to a secret patio. I call it that because you can only get to it by going through the bathroom and those sliders. Here’s what it looks like:
Anyway, people might not be able to get to it, but animals do and this is where the funny and awkward moments happen. Imagine my surprise a few weeks ago when I step out of the shower and see two squirrels doing the nasty on the trunk of the Schefflera (umbrella plant). There’s me. “Oh dear, this is awkward.” As I freeze all motion and try to decide what to do. I mean they were going at it and if I moved I would no doubt ruin the “mood of love”. Yeah, sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? But then what was there left for me to do wrapped in a towel and held hostage as I was? You got it. Watch squirrel porn. How bad is that?
As it turns out? Not too bad. In fact I wound up laughing my ass off because poor Casanova didn’t stand a chance against his Shrew. Here’s the scene:
Ms. Shrew is climbing the plant when Casanova chases her. Only she stops and lifts her tail which makes him stop (imagine his eyebrows popping up and down as he twirls his mustache) before he dives on her. He’s like a rodent possessed (not really, but it sounds more exciting doesn’t it?) as he does his moves. First he’s got his four little paws around her as he hangs onto the trunk. Then things get a little hot and heavy and our over-eager Casanova’s front-hand-like paws grip her shoulders. Ms. Shrew doesn’t seem to mind, so it’s all good, until our furry playboy makes the mistake of being overwhelmed in his ecstasy when shifts his little pork chop legs from the plant and climbs on her. Now she’s supporting both their weight and I was—well, I was left blinking because she did the best shake-off move I ever saw. Casanova went flying and landed with a thud on the deck. I thought Ms. Shrew would run away, but she didn’t. Nope, she stayed there with her tail up and even flicked it at him. (Imagine Mae West in her prime – true story, Ms. Shrew was a bonafide diva) So there’s our playboy doing the groveling crawl back up the trunk to get to her. Don’t ask me why I was still playing statue as you may not like the answer
when he gets two inches from her and she snaps around in a turn and punches him right in the face. I SWEAR TO GOD she did and our poor furry playboy landed with a thud on that deck again.
There’s me, blink-blink, thinking, “Oh, no, you didn’t just see that.”
And there’s Ms. Shrew (imagine her tossing her hair with a sniff) heading up the tree making this loud ticking noise. She was probably saying, “And don’t call me until you get your shit together!”
I couldn’t blame her, but then I spotted our now deflated playboy standing up on his two feet sadly watching her exit. “Aww…” This is when I did a double take. Yeah, aww, nothing! The stupid jerk had his hand on his…you know and was going to…you know. I gasped and stepped to the door. It was one thing to play statue for true love and quite another to…sheesh!
I still laugh though, every time I recall the image of her round-housing him. Bottom line? I have a new respect for squirrels. That’s all I’m saying.
And now I have a new respect for our resident lizards (chameleons) as well. I’m going to call him Larry as Larry was the whole reason I decided to write this post. You see, yesterday when I stepped out of the shower I spotted Larry on the screen outside the glass doors. There he was chasing down a moth that was bigger than he was. It was a Mexican stand off and I knew if I moved the moth would fly away. Yeah, don’t ask, but I have this thing about the circle of life in my yard/gardens. Things get eaten by things it’s a fact and Larry and his buddies, well they eat most of the things I’d rather not find in my house, likes mosquitos, bugs and spiders. So I tend to show them respect when they’re hunting, you know? Once again I find myself playing statue. Waiting for Larry to make his move. He was slow. Really slow and careful as he crept toward the wing-ed beast. So carefully I was enthralled. He was getting closer and closer still. It was going to be an awesome lunch for him. Probably the best catch he’d had in a good long while when—? I sneezed. Hey, I couldn’t help it. Long story short? The wing-ed beast took off and Larry fisted the screen and pressed his nose against the glass glaring at me. (Imagine him rattling the screen fabric like it was a cage and then imagine Marlon Brando screaming “Stella” only it’s Larry screaming “Riley”) before he relieves himself on my window and walks off. Nice.
Bottom line? I can’t control the world outside, but I can control the one inside. And being that I’m short and the proverbial accident happened up high on the glass? I got Honey to clean it off. *wipes brow* Dodged an unwanted Molly Maid moment there.
Hm. There’d probably be way less stress in my life if I just bought some blinds for those doors. I’ll have to think about that.
Riley UPDATE!!!!!! Larry gave it one more shot this morning and I got it.
Check it out.
The poor wing-ed beast!
First of all, I have to explain that my master bath has triple glass sliders that lead out to a secret patio. I call it that because you can only get to it by going through the bathroom and those sliders. Here’s what it looks like:
Anyway, people might not be able to get to it, but animals do and this is where the funny and awkward moments happen. Imagine my surprise a few weeks ago when I step out of the shower and see two squirrels doing the nasty on the trunk of the Schefflera (umbrella plant). There’s me. “Oh dear, this is awkward.” As I freeze all motion and try to decide what to do. I mean they were going at it and if I moved I would no doubt ruin the “mood of love”. Yeah, sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? But then what was there left for me to do wrapped in a towel and held hostage as I was? You got it. Watch squirrel porn. How bad is that?
As it turns out? Not too bad. In fact I wound up laughing my ass off because poor Casanova didn’t stand a chance against his Shrew. Here’s the scene:
Ms. Shrew is climbing the plant when Casanova chases her. Only she stops and lifts her tail which makes him stop (imagine his eyebrows popping up and down as he twirls his mustache) before he dives on her. He’s like a rodent possessed (not really, but it sounds more exciting doesn’t it?) as he does his moves. First he’s got his four little paws around her as he hangs onto the trunk. Then things get a little hot and heavy and our over-eager Casanova’s front-hand-like paws grip her shoulders. Ms. Shrew doesn’t seem to mind, so it’s all good, until our furry playboy makes the mistake of being overwhelmed in his ecstasy when shifts his little pork chop legs from the plant and climbs on her. Now she’s supporting both their weight and I was—well, I was left blinking because she did the best shake-off move I ever saw. Casanova went flying and landed with a thud on the deck. I thought Ms. Shrew would run away, but she didn’t. Nope, she stayed there with her tail up and even flicked it at him. (Imagine Mae West in her prime – true story, Ms. Shrew was a bonafide diva) So there’s our playboy doing the groveling crawl back up the trunk to get to her. Don’t ask me why I was still playing statue as you may not like the answer
when he gets two inches from her and she snaps around in a turn and punches him right in the face. I SWEAR TO GOD she did and our poor furry playboy landed with a thud on that deck again.There’s me, blink-blink, thinking, “Oh, no, you didn’t just see that.”
And there’s Ms. Shrew (imagine her tossing her hair with a sniff) heading up the tree making this loud ticking noise. She was probably saying, “And don’t call me until you get your shit together!”
I couldn’t blame her, but then I spotted our now deflated playboy standing up on his two feet sadly watching her exit. “Aww…” This is when I did a double take. Yeah, aww, nothing! The stupid jerk had his hand on his…you know and was going to…you know. I gasped and stepped to the door. It was one thing to play statue for true love and quite another to…sheesh!
I still laugh though, every time I recall the image of her round-housing him. Bottom line? I have a new respect for squirrels. That’s all I’m saying.
And now I have a new respect for our resident lizards (chameleons) as well. I’m going to call him Larry as Larry was the whole reason I decided to write this post. You see, yesterday when I stepped out of the shower I spotted Larry on the screen outside the glass doors. There he was chasing down a moth that was bigger than he was. It was a Mexican stand off and I knew if I moved the moth would fly away. Yeah, don’t ask, but I have this thing about the circle of life in my yard/gardens. Things get eaten by things it’s a fact and Larry and his buddies, well they eat most of the things I’d rather not find in my house, likes mosquitos, bugs and spiders. So I tend to show them respect when they’re hunting, you know? Once again I find myself playing statue. Waiting for Larry to make his move. He was slow. Really slow and careful as he crept toward the wing-ed beast. So carefully I was enthralled. He was getting closer and closer still. It was going to be an awesome lunch for him. Probably the best catch he’d had in a good long while when—? I sneezed. Hey, I couldn’t help it. Long story short? The wing-ed beast took off and Larry fisted the screen and pressed his nose against the glass glaring at me. (Imagine him rattling the screen fabric like it was a cage and then imagine Marlon Brando screaming “Stella” only it’s Larry screaming “Riley”) before he relieves himself on my window and walks off. Nice.
Bottom line? I can’t control the world outside, but I can control the one inside. And being that I’m short and the proverbial accident happened up high on the glass? I got Honey to clean it off. *wipes brow* Dodged an unwanted Molly Maid moment there.
Hm. There’d probably be way less stress in my life if I just bought some blinds for those doors. I’ll have to think about that.
Riley UPDATE!!!!!! Larry gave it one more shot this morning and I got it.
Check it out.
The poor wing-ed beast!
August 2, 2013
Giveaway!!! One Autographed “Print Copy” of STARE ME DOWN Up For Grabs!!!
Goodreads Book Giveaway
Stare Me Down
by Riley Murphy
Giveaway ends August 19, 2013.
See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.
It’s SO purdy! Here’s what it really looks like in print.
[image error]
July 26, 2013
Saucy Tales From RWA 2013 Part Three
#3 The Case of Mistaken Genre
This happens to be one of my favorite tales coming to you from the pitch lineup prior to the appointment I had with an agent. (I was going to this one alone)
And just so you have the visual here’s one of the flash drives if you haven’t already seen it. I had my website address printed on and this is what I loaded my eBook on for the book signing. With the extras I put excerpts of my other books or my book videos on them. I LOVE them.
There I was standing with a group of women all excited about having the opportunity of sharing their stories with industry professionals, when one woman *waves to Susan* turns to look behind her. There were two women between me and Susan, but my clothes peg flash drives caught her attention and she leaned around these women and said, “Are those ever neat. Clothes pegs.” She pointed. “So do you write small town stories about the local laundry mat and local gossipy stuff?”
Me, *blink, blinking* because this kind of misinterpretation of the flash drives NEVER occurred to me. Scout’s honor. Therefore I was stuck thinking fast with most of the line now gathered around looking at the pegs I had clipped to my tag. At this point, I could have said a number of things, but the truth is always the least complicated. Maybe not the easiest route, but… “Absolutely not. I write exactly the polar opposite.” It was her turn to *blink, blink*, so I added, “I write erotic romance. Mostly BDSM romance.”
Susan didn’t miss a beat. Her face lit up and she practically shouted, “Nippy clamps! How clever!”
Okay, people, if you can image, I now had a whole pile of curious eyes drilling into the area of my chest as if I had no shirt on and I was currently doing a live demonstration. Beautiful! Meh, the whole experience turned out to be beneficial in the end, as I was totally relieved by the time they ushered us in for our appointments. I would have rather faced an agent or editor cold, then stand and answer questions about nipple clamps, that’s for sure. Not that I have anything against them, but I did mention that my daughter was with me, didn’t I? Thankfully, she wasn’t in line with me at the time, but I could hear her laughing her butt off from where she was seated off to the left. Once again, beautiful.
Points that I’ve pondered since being home and writing these posts?
NOTE: If you missed Saucy Tales one (click here) or two (click here)
A riding crop is a game changer on an evening out.
People don’t look like their photos so always ask them for their full name.
Christine Witthohn is made of awesome sauce, but she’s a stickler for rules and she won’t bend them even for me. True story *sigh* I must be losing my touch, but hey, this just makes me love her even more. I feel bad about that because it doesn’t bode well for her. My fixating on a person never pans out well for the fixate-ee. Just sayin’.
Christopher Keeslar listens to EVERYTHING. And, by that, I do mean everything. Freakin’ hell, I think he knew more about the hero we pitched him than we did. But, erm, don’t tell him I said so, okay? That might dampen the dazzle of our first joint pitch. Seriously, I know he was bedazzled because a person’s eyes don’t cross like that just out of the blue.
Rhonda Helms, well I already knew she was wonderful, having worked with her, but what I learned at RWA is that she’s also hilarious! Loved getting to meet her in person at the Passionate Ink party.
KL Grady is absolutely FAB! She’s also tiny. I mean, tiny as in I wanted to fit her into my pocket. Of course, this could spell trouble now that I know I’m bigger and taller than she is. Next edits I get from her where she says, “This isn’t going to work, you’ll need to revise, revise, revise, I may have to pull the height card on her.
Julia Brooks *waves at my twitter buddy* was much younger than I thought she was. Swear. And she looked like Rose from Two and a Half men. I lub Rose and I loved meeting Julia too!
A big shout out to Cristal Ryder! She came by to see me at the Indie book signing and it was so nice to finally meet her!
C.L Wilson? Ah, can you say, FAN CRUSH! I spent Friday afternoon chatting with her and we made some plans. >:)
I could go on and on as I met so many great people! My favorite line of the conference? Well, this was from a new friend (who isn’t online yet – ugh!) who was nervous about her editor appointment. We sat together at lunch and I gave her the old Murphy pep-talk which basically consisted of – be yourself. Seriously this gal was funny and when I heard her pitch she was trying hard not to be. Anyways, I suggested she loosen up a little and have some fun. After all, editors are people too…sort of. So in the late afternoon when we all met up in the bar to share our pitch stories I about fell out of my chair when my new friend says, “Riley you were so right about lightening up. I told the editor I had a wonderful romantic suspense that had absolutely no sex in it. When the young woman did a double take I added. Oh, not that I don’t like sex. I do. In fact I love it. I just can’t write it. Never had the knack for penning the kink.” And she was serious. I LMAO!
Okay, confession time. Cathy Maxwell made me cry. She rocked her speech and I left that ballroom thinking I could do anything!
Kristan Higgins rocked hers as well. So inspiring!
The last thing I can share with you about RWA 2013? The romance community is THE BEST! So many individuals striving with likeminded purpose. It was invigorating and exciting. I can’t wait to get back to the job of writing…and as to that? My “In The Works” will be updated shortly. One item will be added and another book will be moved from my 2013 lineup to spring of 2014. For those of you waiting for that one? Don’t hate me, okay?
Riley
This happens to be one of my favorite tales coming to you from the pitch lineup prior to the appointment I had with an agent. (I was going to this one alone)
And just so you have the visual here’s one of the flash drives if you haven’t already seen it. I had my website address printed on and this is what I loaded my eBook on for the book signing. With the extras I put excerpts of my other books or my book videos on them. I LOVE them.
There I was standing with a group of women all excited about having the opportunity of sharing their stories with industry professionals, when one woman *waves to Susan* turns to look behind her. There were two women between me and Susan, but my clothes peg flash drives caught her attention and she leaned around these women and said, “Are those ever neat. Clothes pegs.” She pointed. “So do you write small town stories about the local laundry mat and local gossipy stuff?”
Me, *blink, blinking* because this kind of misinterpretation of the flash drives NEVER occurred to me. Scout’s honor. Therefore I was stuck thinking fast with most of the line now gathered around looking at the pegs I had clipped to my tag. At this point, I could have said a number of things, but the truth is always the least complicated. Maybe not the easiest route, but… “Absolutely not. I write exactly the polar opposite.” It was her turn to *blink, blink*, so I added, “I write erotic romance. Mostly BDSM romance.”
Susan didn’t miss a beat. Her face lit up and she practically shouted, “Nippy clamps! How clever!”
Okay, people, if you can image, I now had a whole pile of curious eyes drilling into the area of my chest as if I had no shirt on and I was currently doing a live demonstration. Beautiful! Meh, the whole experience turned out to be beneficial in the end, as I was totally relieved by the time they ushered us in for our appointments. I would have rather faced an agent or editor cold, then stand and answer questions about nipple clamps, that’s for sure. Not that I have anything against them, but I did mention that my daughter was with me, didn’t I? Thankfully, she wasn’t in line with me at the time, but I could hear her laughing her butt off from where she was seated off to the left. Once again, beautiful.
Points that I’ve pondered since being home and writing these posts?
NOTE: If you missed Saucy Tales one (click here) or two (click here)
A riding crop is a game changer on an evening out.
People don’t look like their photos so always ask them for their full name.
Christine Witthohn is made of awesome sauce, but she’s a stickler for rules and she won’t bend them even for me. True story *sigh* I must be losing my touch, but hey, this just makes me love her even more. I feel bad about that because it doesn’t bode well for her. My fixating on a person never pans out well for the fixate-ee. Just sayin’.
Christopher Keeslar listens to EVERYTHING. And, by that, I do mean everything. Freakin’ hell, I think he knew more about the hero we pitched him than we did. But, erm, don’t tell him I said so, okay? That might dampen the dazzle of our first joint pitch. Seriously, I know he was bedazzled because a person’s eyes don’t cross like that just out of the blue.
Rhonda Helms, well I already knew she was wonderful, having worked with her, but what I learned at RWA is that she’s also hilarious! Loved getting to meet her in person at the Passionate Ink party.
KL Grady is absolutely FAB! She’s also tiny. I mean, tiny as in I wanted to fit her into my pocket. Of course, this could spell trouble now that I know I’m bigger and taller than she is. Next edits I get from her where she says, “This isn’t going to work, you’ll need to revise, revise, revise, I may have to pull the height card on her.
Julia Brooks *waves at my twitter buddy* was much younger than I thought she was. Swear. And she looked like Rose from Two and a Half men. I lub Rose and I loved meeting Julia too!
A big shout out to Cristal Ryder! She came by to see me at the Indie book signing and it was so nice to finally meet her!
C.L Wilson? Ah, can you say, FAN CRUSH! I spent Friday afternoon chatting with her and we made some plans. >:)
I could go on and on as I met so many great people! My favorite line of the conference? Well, this was from a new friend (who isn’t online yet – ugh!) who was nervous about her editor appointment. We sat together at lunch and I gave her the old Murphy pep-talk which basically consisted of – be yourself. Seriously this gal was funny and when I heard her pitch she was trying hard not to be. Anyways, I suggested she loosen up a little and have some fun. After all, editors are people too…sort of.
So in the late afternoon when we all met up in the bar to share our pitch stories I about fell out of my chair when my new friend says, “Riley you were so right about lightening up. I told the editor I had a wonderful romantic suspense that had absolutely no sex in it. When the young woman did a double take I added. Oh, not that I don’t like sex. I do. In fact I love it. I just can’t write it. Never had the knack for penning the kink.” And she was serious. I LMAO!Okay, confession time. Cathy Maxwell made me cry. She rocked her speech and I left that ballroom thinking I could do anything!
Kristan Higgins rocked hers as well. So inspiring!
The last thing I can share with you about RWA 2013? The romance community is THE BEST! So many individuals striving with likeminded purpose. It was invigorating and exciting. I can’t wait to get back to the job of writing…and as to that? My “In The Works” will be updated shortly. One item will be added and another book will be moved from my 2013 lineup to spring of 2014. For those of you waiting for that one? Don’t hate me, okay?
Riley
July 25, 2013
Saucy Tales From RWA 2013 (PART DEUX)
#2 The Case Of Mistaken Identity
If you missed part one (click here)
Actually, mistaken is an overreach here I’m thinking, as we hadn’t identified this woman as being anyone other than a conference goer because her badge was turned around. There we were, sitting chatting about the riding crop incident the previous night in one of the upscale restaurants in the hotel (don’t ask, but I will share with you it involved a rather nervous gentleman addressing me as ma’am and offering to buy us a drink. It wasn’t until he left that my daughter pointed to the crop I’d gotten as a party favor and said, “You may want to do something with that.” I looked to my right and noticed the darn thing standing at attention out of my purse. Quickly I wrestled with it and put it in a less conspicuous place while we dined, but it certainly intrigued a few patrons, as two more men came to our table. Long story short, we concluded that a riding crop was a good icebreaker if one was looking for a date. Who knew? Not Honey, so don’t tell him, okay?) Anyway, back to the case of mistaken identity. There we were, chatting about our upcoming pitch session (“we” as in – I’m co-authoring a book with my daughter) that we were getting ready to run by an editor, when we start regaling our new friend with thoughts about how to garner a solid request from said editor. This involved bringing the crop with us and just gingerly placing the item on the table, before quietly staring the poor editor down. Then we began riffing and embellishing on the notion, getting really ridiculous about things and suggesting we’d bring the Wartenberg wheel – here is what it looks like
(We dubbed this “The Wheel of Dis-fortune” for obvious reasons)
and when my daughter mimicked bring the pinwheel up in front of an eye like a magnifying glass and made as if she were spinning the spikes in a villainous and dastardly manner, we all lost it. There was more of course, because I’m not going to lie, with us there’s always more, but it wasn’t until the tears were dried and our new friend announced it was time she had to go get ready for her appoints – that we all exchanged cards. And there I was confidently assuring our new buddy that we’d email her to let her know how our appointment went, that I noticed her name. I tried not to lose it when she stood, but it was kind of hard. My head snapped up and I can honestly say this was the first time in a good long while I was speechless.
She was so great about it. All she did was grin and say, “I’m sorry I’m not the editor you’re pitching to this afternoon. Good luck ladies, you’ve got my card.”
I sat there and replayed the whole conversation in my mind when my daughter asks, “Wait, was she an editor?”
I nod and my daughter snatches the card out of my hands and says, “Sweet.”
Sweet? Oh, to be twenty-four again. *sigh* The upside? I do believe in this case me not knowing was an advantage. Maybe.
Riley – who shall be sharing The Case Of The Mistaken Genre on tomorrow’s post. Still LMAO over that one!
July 24, 2013
Saucy Tales From RWA 2013 Part One
First, here I am at the Indie Book Signing. It was the best! I met fans, other writers and hopefully some new readers.
This was the first picture taken by DD, who told me to lighten up because I looked thrilled. Nice.
Now imagine Hitchcock meets Ellen DeGeneres on steroids as DD tries to get the “happy” shot by pulling out all the stops. When I wasn’t under the table laughing, this is the best we got. Actually, we did snap another one, but the caption on it would be “Squirrel” sub titled “deer caught in the headlights” so you ain’t getting to see that one.
Alrighty, this week I’m sharing a few things that happened to me while I was attending the conference.
#1 is The Case Of The Dummy Domme
Okay? Does this look bad? Come on, be honest.
LMAO! After stopping by the Passionate Ink party *waves to President Cristal Ryder* on Thursday night at RWA, this is what I unloaded on the hotel table in my room. I didn’t even blink until I realized that I may have freaked out the maid because the next day after I returned to my suite in the afternoon I noticed she left extra towels—something she’d been previously skimping on—and she had also double stocked the coffee bar. Here again, this was an area she’d been previous light on the condiments. So I felt kind of bad until I saw the benefits. *twirls my imaginary handlebar mustache and pops my eyebrows at you* Gee, I may travel with these items from now on. Heheheh
Tomorrow I shall be discussing the case of mistaken identity. This one inadvertently involves, some guys, the crop, the wheel and my mystery person. I do blush. Oh, my!
Riley – who appears to never have a dull moment.
This was the first picture taken by DD, who told me to lighten up because I looked thrilled. Nice.
Now imagine Hitchcock meets Ellen DeGeneres on steroids as DD tries to get the “happy” shot by pulling out all the stops. When I wasn’t under the table laughing, this is the best we got. Actually, we did snap another one, but the caption on it would be “Squirrel” sub titled “deer caught in the headlights” so you ain’t getting to see that one.
Alrighty, this week I’m sharing a few things that happened to me while I was attending the conference.
#1 is The Case Of The Dummy Domme
Okay? Does this look bad? Come on, be honest.
LMAO! After stopping by the Passionate Ink party *waves to President Cristal Ryder* on Thursday night at RWA, this is what I unloaded on the hotel table in my room. I didn’t even blink until I realized that I may have freaked out the maid because the next day after I returned to my suite in the afternoon I noticed she left extra towels—something she’d been previously skimping on—and she had also double stocked the coffee bar. Here again, this was an area she’d been previous light on the condiments. So I felt kind of bad until I saw the benefits. *twirls my imaginary handlebar mustache and pops my eyebrows at you* Gee, I may travel with these items from now on. Heheheh
Tomorrow I shall be discussing the case of mistaken identity. This one inadvertently involves, some guys, the crop, the wheel and my mystery person. I do blush. Oh, my!
Riley – who appears to never have a dull moment.
July 14, 2013
I’M GETTING READY ARE YOU???
Here is my stuff for the eBook signing! I’m so excited about this and I love my stuff! The first thing I did was order CD covers with the book cover on them. Inside on the disc I burned the book video! Then on the flash drives I loaded my manuscript. I LOVE these drives because they really work like regular clothes pegs see…
This makes it harder to lose
And lookie what I got this week!!! Stare Me Down is in print!
[image error]
So here’s the deal. I will be giving away 50 of the CD/peg flash drives of Stare Me down at the RWA Indie Authors book signing. this is being held at the Marriott Marquis in Atlanta Georgia, July 18th between 3-4:15 in the Marquis Ballroom D. If you want one of these babies come and find me. I will also have another 20 or so on hand throughout the conference – loaded with snippets of my books and then an additional 15 or so loaded with my latest book video for Love Of A Lifetime that will be releasing this fall. I know you can see coming soon picture of it above, but (click here) if you want to see the cover, blurb excerpts from that one.
Then, when I get back from the conference I’m going to be running a couple of giveaways with the CD/clothes peg flash drives (winner’s choice of what book of mine is loaded on it). I’m thinking, since Love Of A Lifetime will be completed and ready for market weeks prior to publication I will offer a couple of ARC’s (advanced reader copy) as a prize too. Why not, right? Just check back late July for all the details. And don’t forget that also in late July Paige and Grady’s story is going to be released. We’re (the most talented Christine Bell and I) are keeping that cover secret until release date. It’s so frickin’ hot! Can’t wait for you guys to see it!!!!
Love Of A Lifetime
Meet Jack Midland and Finley Cullen
Think the Marquis De Sade meets a modern day Cinderella. Only when this not-so-charming prince confiscates his chosen princess’ footwear to preempt her escaping him in a blinding snow storm, she’s not taking his brazen theft lying down…or is she?
This is their story
Ms. Finley Cullen
“I don’t think it would be wise to go out in this, do you?”
“I have to.”
He let the drapes go and shook his head. “No, you don’t. Nothing is so important that you should risk your life and limb.”
“Oh yes. You don’t understand. I need to interview the guy.” She was prepared to lay it on thick in order to convince him. “Really, I’d…” She couldn’t get any more words out. His penetrating stare silenced her. His full attention, directed right at her, acted like an unspoken warning. And the way the jade-green of his eyes turned to a deep and dark emerald color made her breathless. Wary. Wanting something she couldn’t put a name to.
“You’d what?”
He pronounced the “t” in that last word so succinctly she flinched. Before she thought about what to answer him, the words just tumbled out. “I’d be forever grateful if you’d help me.”
The wood in the fire hissed and popped as he examined her. Was he trying to decide? If he were, he wasn’t happy about it because now he was back to scowling again.
“How grateful?”
Wow, there was no mistaking that innuendo. If she had to put a description to his tone, she’d have say, audible sex. She nearly melted, but once she mopped herself up and got it together, she scowled right back at him. Wet dream come to life, or not, the guy needed to know she had boundaries and he’d just trampled them. “I’ll mention you in the Pulitzer prize winning article I’m going to write on Midland.”
Holy hell, he smiled and her knees nearly gave out. No man had the right to look this gorgeous. It wasn’t fair.
“That’s it?”
“Isn’t it enough?”
“No.”
His smile eased to a grin as he walked toward her. The closer he came, the more the warmth inside her spread. Until heavy tingles invaded her breasts, making her already spiked nipples harden in anticipation of being touched. Just the thought had an acute ache sweeping through her to stall right between her legs, where it pulsed so hard that hot desire spilled to soak her panties and she nearly passed out. If he hadn’t taken hold of her arms she was sure she would have crumbled. It took every ounce of willpower she had to get her next words out. “P-please help me find Jack Midland.”
“I already have.”
“Y-you? You can’t be him.”
His scent, the heat and yes, lust that coursed through her shook her to the core. She tried to fight it off and when she couldn’t, she attempted to rationalize it. Maybe she was still feeling the effects of whatever her colleagues had given her. Why else would she be feeling as if she were stuck in an erotic dream?
She didn’t fight him when he pulled her in close. Now she was helpless. Fully caught in his shadow and when he curled down over her, she was lost.
He searched her face, her shoulders, pausing to examine her neck before he huskily promised, “I’ll be whoever you want me to be.”
His head descended and that sensual heat flared within her. She couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. Her whole body trembled with need. She wanted to give into it. She wanted to let go but—“No.”
(end of excerpt)
Jack Midland
Without a word, he went to her. He pulled her into his arms and searched her face. She was breathtaking. Clear skin, sex-drugged eyes, plump lips and that erotic little beauty mark that found its way to hover just over the right side of her mouth in every damn lifetime. Oh yeah, he would have lost it if he didn’t believe that choices define the man. To that end, he silently acknowledged, satisfying the flesh takes but a moment. Whereas a gentle touch to the soul could last a lifetime.
“I’m glad you’re home.” He curled down and brushed his stubble-roughened cheek against her silky one. “Let me make your wildest dreams come true.”
Her head fell back and the words sounded as if they were ripped out of her, “You’re a ghost. You have to be.”
He tightened his grip on her. “I’ll be anything you want me to be. Stay strong. I’m here for you.”
“Y—You are?” She closed her eyes and frowned. “Why?”
Damn, he wished he could see the cobalt fire ignited in her gaze. It had been years since he’d been challenged. No one except her had ever dared to poke the beast within him. A brute that had sorely missed the one woman who was everything to him. “I’m going to entice you to do the things you never thought possible. You will crave, mia lei, everything I do to you, but more importantly, all that I don’t…you will want.”
He pressed his lips to her cheekbone and against each eyelid. He’d been right before. She tasted like sun-drenched flowers washed in cleansing rain.
“I—I can’t breathe.”
His chin dug into the hair at her temple as he rubbed and purred, “I’m here for you. I know it feels like the end, but it’s only the beginning.” He touched his forehead to hers and whispered, “Here. Always. Together we are one. I stand stalwart by your side. Unshakable.” He crushed her against him and rasped, “Trust Me. This.”
She shook her head and her eyes fluttered opened to look at him as she cried, “I’m…I’m choking. I’m going to die.”
“Never. Unless it’s in my arms from pleasure, I swear.” He leaned down and engulfed her. “Mia sandor lei, now that I’ve found you, I will always be closer than the breath within you. Relax. Breathe deeply. Breathe with me. I’m here.”
She gasped. Panted, almost hyperventilating, and he knew he needed to do something.
“Fi—Finley.” He hated stumbling over this, but as usual, her unfamiliar name didn’t roll easily off his tongue. Especially when he ached so much to call her by the one name that did. “Trust me.”
“But…”
He pressed his lips to her furrowed brow. “I am the whisper of wind you feel upon you.”
She shivered.
“I’m the wicked tingle that vibrates beneath your skin.”
She moaned.
“I am your defender as you shed your pride and embrace your darkest desires for me. I am the shadow and the light as we face each new day together.”
“New day?”
“And night, mia lei, but those belong to me. Right now. You. Are mine.”
He bent and swept her up in his arms. Holding her tight even as he tried to calm the white-hot lust that roiled through him. Mere words could only get him so far with her. Now it was time to take action and although he was loath to use the ties of their connection against her, he knew he had no choice. Too much. Too many depended on this night unfolding with her being claimed by him in the most basic way possible.
And right now only one thought screamed through him, as he carried her from the room.
Please let her love me in the breaking light of dawn, or failing that, may she forgive me…
July 12, 2013
REARRANGING THE BAD!
This is Honey’s forte. I’m not a hundred percent positive when he turned from amateur to pro on this, but I think it was about five years into our thirty-plus year relationship.
And what does this talent consist of, you may ask? I call it being able to do the old bullshite switch-a-roo. There we were last night bantering back and forth about what we were watching on t.v. when Honey tried to pull one over on me. Ha! Those days ended right about the time our second child was born, so he had to know he was going be called on it. Here’s the conversation but to set this up, in the show we flicked it on for a moment (as we hadn’t agreed on one we both liked yet) a guy in a bar walks over to woman and asks something like, “What’s your pleasure?” The woman demurs, “I was going to ask you the same thing.” Then Mr. Smooth bends over and whispers in Ms. Easy’s ear and she gets up and leaves with him.
I’m thinking, Wow, that must have been some line, but as usual Honey says out loud what I’m turning over silently in my mind.
Honey, “What would a guy have to say to you to get you to leave like that with him?”
I don’t even hesitate. “It’s not so much what he’d have to say, as there’d have to be chemistry there. If I didn’t have that instant ‘Oh yeah’ revving, I wouldn’t get off the stool, let alone leave with the guy.”
“Interesting.”
I can tell this wasn’t what Honey was looking for in way of answer from me, so I narrow a look at him and ask, “What about you? What would a woman have to say to get you to go with her?”
He looks right at me. “She could say whatever she wanted, but I’d have to tell her I was a happily married man, and although I was flattered she’d best move on.”
My eyes narrow even more as realize he’d steered me right into that one. “Oh right. Tell me if Jennifer Aniston tried to pick you up you wouldn’t think about it.”
“No I wouldn’t have to think. I wouldn’t even hesitate.”
I snort and turn away and in my head the ditty playing is, “Liar, liar, pants on fire”! But then his next words cut through my mental chant.
“I’d invite her back to our place because I don’t think you’d turn her down either. You see? It’s a win, win if we do it my way.”
Frickin’ guy!
I got up and sniffed, “I see all right. You just rearrange the bad to suit you.”
He grins—I hate when he does that because I so love when he does it—and says, “You just don’t like it when I’m right.”
I opened my mouth to say something, but really, what could I answer to that? He was correct after all. I mean, who could turn down the Aniston?
It was time to crush his joy.
I widen my eyes like I just had an epiphany and make sure there’s elevated excitement in my tone, “Great point! Next time I’m out and a guy who floats my boat tries to pick me up? I’ll be sure to bring him home…for us.” I walk away, but turn back when I get to the doorway. “Oh, and you be sure to do the same when you run into Jen. So, ah, good luck with that.”
As I went back to my office I was already texting my girlfriend for a girl’s night out. One in which I’d find Mr. Imaginary Guy who floats my boat so I can mess with Honey a little.
Heheheh!
I haz a plan.
Poor Honey… >:)
Riley – Below is Mr. Imaginary Guy…
July 4, 2013
YOU DON’T SAY….
So there Honey and I were late yesterday afternoon relaxing in the family room. Yeah, sometimes we just sit side-by-side in the leather recliners and talk instead of working or watching TV. Crazy, huh? Anyways, being that it felt like a Friday with the holiday and all, we kicked back and chatted. About what you may ask?
We started with future house projects and then moved onto work, family, politics, religion and sex.
Koala Bears.
Are you blinking? Shaking your head? Or wondering if I mistyped something?
Well, unfortunately folks, I didn’t. I said Koala Bears. Here’s the setup with the ensuing conversation.
We both have our feet up. I’m drinking a glass of wine and he’s got a beer. As I explained we’d already redesigned the house, touched on work subjects, family and politics, so it was onto religion, naturally.
Keep in mind that we don’t necessarily look at one another while we’re talking as we’re both staring straight ahead mostly as we are almost shoulder to shoulder.
So after a quiet pause I think of something interesting to tell him. “Oh, remember I told you that the new pope, Pope Francis, came right out and said that atheists weren’t going to hell?”
He takes a pull of his beer and then says, “Sure.”
“Well it seems that he may have said it, but his spokesperson has a different opinion.”
“The Pope has a spokesperson?”
“Yep, well he’s a Vatican spokesperson so it’s basically the same thing I’m thinking. Anyways, his name is Thomas Rosica and he says that all salvation comes from Christ, the head, of which the church is his body and I’m paraphrasing here, so how can you expect salvation if you don’t believe?”
Honey thinks about that for a minute and then sighs, “I’m thinking a true atheist wouldn’t give a rat’s ass one way or another.”
I nodded because I was thinking the same thing. Then it’s quiet for a beat. Long enough for me to think I should get up and start making dinner when Honey puts his hand over mine and squeezes it. I turn my head against the headrest and look at him. That’s when I notice his eyes are dark and sparkly so I’m paying attention. Sure that whatever he has to say is going to be awesome.
“Did you know,” he said, rubbing his thumb over my hand, “that a male koala bear has a forked penis and after he mates with his female he secretes this stuff that seals her up, so another male can’t mate with her?”
For once I was too stunned to even blink!!!! WTH? I burst out laughing and he totally ignored me as he went on to tell me about how the female koala has two vaginas and the male has a mating call and their offspring is called a Joey and…and…and that’s when I knew he’d been watching too much of the discovery channel. *shakes head*
You might be wondering why I found the need to post this today. I mean how can his fun factoids about the koala bear have anything to do with our celebrating the 4th of July this afternoon with friends? Welp, I shall tell you. While he’s out fishing with the boys this morning, I snuck out to the store and bought some Foster’s ale and shrimp to go on the barbie. I figure I may as well join him as I KNOW he’s going to pull out these little bizarre tidbits to entertain our friends. Just call me Sheila.
Happy 4th of July!!!!
Riley
We started with future house projects and then moved onto work, family, politics, religion and sex.
Koala Bears.
Are you blinking? Shaking your head? Or wondering if I mistyped something?
Well, unfortunately folks, I didn’t. I said Koala Bears. Here’s the setup with the ensuing conversation.
We both have our feet up. I’m drinking a glass of wine and he’s got a beer. As I explained we’d already redesigned the house, touched on work subjects, family and politics, so it was onto religion, naturally.
Keep in mind that we don’t necessarily look at one another while we’re talking as we’re both staring straight ahead mostly as we are almost shoulder to shoulder.So after a quiet pause I think of something interesting to tell him. “Oh, remember I told you that the new pope, Pope Francis, came right out and said that atheists weren’t going to hell?”
He takes a pull of his beer and then says, “Sure.”
“Well it seems that he may have said it, but his spokesperson has a different opinion.”
“The Pope has a spokesperson?”
“Yep, well he’s a Vatican spokesperson so it’s basically the same thing I’m thinking. Anyways, his name is Thomas Rosica and he says that all salvation comes from Christ, the head, of which the church is his body and I’m paraphrasing here, so how can you expect salvation if you don’t believe?”
Honey thinks about that for a minute and then sighs, “I’m thinking a true atheist wouldn’t give a rat’s ass one way or another.”
I nodded because I was thinking the same thing. Then it’s quiet for a beat. Long enough for me to think I should get up and start making dinner when Honey puts his hand over mine and squeezes it. I turn my head against the headrest and look at him. That’s when I notice his eyes are dark and sparkly so I’m paying attention. Sure that whatever he has to say is going to be awesome.
“Did you know,” he said, rubbing his thumb over my hand, “that a male koala bear has a forked penis and after he mates with his female he secretes this stuff that seals her up, so another male can’t mate with her?”
For once I was too stunned to even blink!!!! WTH? I burst out laughing and he totally ignored me as he went on to tell me about how the female koala has two vaginas and the male has a mating call and their offspring is called a Joey and…and…and that’s when I knew he’d been watching too much of the discovery channel. *shakes head*
You might be wondering why I found the need to post this today. I mean how can his fun factoids about the koala bear have anything to do with our celebrating the 4th of July this afternoon with friends? Welp, I shall tell you. While he’s out fishing with the boys this morning, I snuck out to the store and bought some Foster’s ale and shrimp to go on the barbie. I figure I may as well join him as I KNOW he’s going to pull out these little bizarre tidbits to entertain our friends. Just call me Sheila.
Happy 4th of July!!!!
Riley
