Riley Murphy's Blog, page 2

MELTING ICE

Merry Christmas and a big Happy Holidays To You!

This one is to my dad! I love you & still miss you!

 

 

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas!

M.

It’s A Bird, A Plane, A Giant’s Q-Tip???

I figured I’d put that disclaimer out there because I love Santa Claus…and after he reads this I know I’ll be on his naughty list. Which isn’t so bad. I’m sure if I buy myself the right kind of gifts, the big guy will come around. *Wink, wink*

*Drum roll please*

And now without further ado, here is that post I promised. Read it and weep. Yes, weep. Seriously, you should be shedding tears of joy that you didn’t get these delivered to your house the way I did.

Check out this slice of Riley’s life…if you dare.

Deck The Balls With Hows Of Folly?

 

I’d say, “Ho, Ho, Ho”, but it’s more like Bah, ha, ha, ha!

*Pulls down my readers to look at you over the rim*

Honey is in fine form this Xmas season. Check it out.

Place: Our dining room

Time: This morning

Occasion: Computer tutoring 101

Imagine him staring at the new laptop as if it’s a rabid alien suffering from a dual case of horrific malaises. *Narrows eyes while I think about an appropriate analogy*

Got it.

In this scenario, the alien is not only suffering from the plague, but a very contagious skin hive-rash type deal that is transferred instantaneously once contact is made.

Now…

Imagine me rolling my eyes at the silly man for keeping his distance.

Tell Me Some Lies…& More of Our Build-a-Giveaway!

 

I had to post this one since I was laughing my butt off over it.

There I am driving home from the store, mulling over what to blog about and I think: SEX.

Oh, don’t look at me like. It’s fun to write about, at least for me.

RELEASE DAY! BUILD A GIVEAWAY! AND A HONEY STORY! OH MY!!!

 

 

It’s release day!!!

So happy that Genevieve and Caleb are meeting the world! I love these guys!

I also love my gang, some of whom I spent the day with yesterday. Since my mom is visiting my sister for a couple of weeks, it was nice to hang out with my daughter and Honey for lunch. This is when we had the most interesting discussion…and by interesting, I mean hilarious.

It went something like this.

My daughter says, “Although it’s kind of nice to have a bit of a break, I miss nanny.”

Honey nods. and I say, “Yep, but she’ll be home soon enough for your weekly lunch dates.”

I say, “Yep, but she’ll be home soon enough for you guys to do your weekly lunch dates.”

(My daughter and her husband take grandma out to lunch once a week. Sometimes together and sometimes they switch off doing separately)

“We all can’t wait for that,” Honey said.The translation being. When

The translation being. When nanny is home it is a Godsend when the kids come up and take her out for the afternoon. Gives all of us some time to chill, you know? Not that my mom is tough to deal with, she’s just intense about whatever she’s doing. Right down to Judge Judy. If she can’t get that woman on TV – there is hell to pay, people! I swear. But I digress.

My daughter laughed. “You know? We were just talking about nanny last night and I decided that she’s Benjamin Buttoning it.”

There’s Honey and I doing the old big *blink, blink*.

Doesn’t faze her. “Seriously. Don’t you think she looks better today than she did first of the year?”

And there’s Me and Honey. Nodding. Thinking. Considering. Suspiciously going over the idea that had some merit now that the topic was put out there. But how was this possible?

It was as if my girl read my thoughts. “It could happen. I just finished Stephen Kings book about this old dude who gets younger living off the steam of the young.”

Honey sits back in such a way we both know she’s lost him. “Here we go.”

My daughter laughed again. “No, really, follow me here. You know those soul-crushers that nanny zings out on a regular basis?”

I should pause here for a moment. Have I mentioned my mother’s penchant for the left – and by left I mean extreme left-hand compliment with a big a side of a full nose sucker punch?

No?

*Shakes head* Don’t know how I missed telling y’all about this talent of hers. She doesn’t do it to me because she knows I’m immune, but to the kids? Oh, hell yeah! She wields that tricky elder card with a precision that would impress The Divine.

Example: She once said to my son-in-law. “You have nice hands. Can I see them?” When the poor guy held one out to her she turned it over, pursed her lips, and then said, “They don’t look like they’ve worked a day in this life.”

Nice.

When we call her on it – because we always do – she backtracks like the pro she is.

*Le sigh* You see? I do miss miss her…

But back to the conversation.

My daughter is practically crying laughing as she explains how her guy is convinced his lunches with nanny are literally sucking the fountain of youth steam out of him. Making nanny younger and causing him to reevaluate his world view while he shops for a fashionable walker.

I say, “Poor guy.”

And what does Honey say? “Jesus H. How long has he known? Don’t you think he could have told me?”

Both my girl and I stare at Honey, and that’s when he looks between us with this – I’d say serious, but it was more like a stricken expression before he growls. “That’s where these lines are coming from.”

I didn’t know about my girl, but I was pretty sure the laugh lines around his eyes definitely weren’t caused by my mom. I doubted they were even caused by age.

Nope.

Those suckers were totally me. One hundred percent.

My daughter? She wisely changed the subject and in no time at all we were on the safer topic of where we should go when we had a double date with her guy and her. The second she brought up this new studio down by her place that taught Salsa dancing? That’s when I knew the truth.

I may be working on etching those laugh lines on Honey’s face in this lifetime – but she had definitely claimed ownership of the worry ones across his forehead.

Haha!

Honey would dance all night with me providing the songs were slow and he knew them. (He likes to sing along) But fast and up-tempo tunes? Yeah, I’m on my own. Literally, because he was never one to let me dance with other guys.

Moral of this story? Appreciate the little stuff. Even a silly conversation about soul sucking and salsa dancing. ;D

Oh, and we’ve started a next big giveaway!

Here’s what we’re opening with. An Amazon 25.00 gift card!

 

 

 

 

 

There will be five items in total in the giveaway. Remember the rules. If you’re a subscriber you are already entered, but with each comment you leave on posts during the giveaway build your name gets entered again for more chances to win.

 

As always, thanks for stopping by!

Riley

PERMIT ME

PERMIT ME IS UP FOR PRE-ORDER!!!!

Click on the picture above for a look at the book video!

I will be posting the start to our next giveaway on Friday! Can’t wait.

Riley

 

We Have A Winner!

We have the piggie salt and pepper shakers, the green apple candle, the Star Force game, Newman’s own mint tin, a dove dark chocolate bar (I added those two for the last items) and the Amazon gift card!

And the winner is????

*Insert drumroll here*

NYLaurie!!!

Congrats! I will email you with the details!

As always guys! Thanks for playing…

Riley

So You Think A Little Poisoning Is Going To Stop Me?

 

That would be a big NOPE!

I actually wrote this post yesterday, but it disappeared, so imma going to rewrite it.

*Le sigh*

It probably won’t be as funny. Dammit!

I was telling you guys about my mom, Honey, me & the game show Jeopardy. We love watching the show with her because she thinks we’re great at it.

Which we’re not.

She does a big thumbs up or gushes over how smart we are when we get an answer.

Don’t ask.

The question, “Who’s buried in Grant’s tomb?”

I say Lou, and she says, “That’s great. Close, but it was Ulysses S.”