Riley Murphy's Blog, page 4

Permit Me! Coming Soon and A Giveaway!

This is my next full length single title story. It’s Caleb and Genevieve’s journey. Love these guys! If you click on the photo you’ll be directed to the YouTube video – or you can click the link below that I’ve left for you.

Yay! It’s Laundry Lottery Day!

I know I haven’t posted in a while, but let’s just say, I’m back now so buckle up.

*Insert me twirling my handlebar mustache here, just before I tie you to the train so you are forced to listen*

So, um…laundry lottery, you say?

Yup. That would have been yesterday, and if you refer to the above picture you will see that I scored from Honey’s pockets big-time this week.

Imagine me checking out the excavated treasures. Now to identify.

Looks at the wad of blue paint tape all squashed and thinks, “Meh, he cut himself again and taped up the wound until it stopped bleeding. No good to me.”

I toss the tape ball in the garbage.

Picks up that blue plastic thing and then puts it aside for the moment. But seriously. WTH is it?

Then looks at the tile spacer. (Psst. That’s the white ‘X’ plastic thing on top of the black rubber thing) and decides, “Don’t care about that as Honey has a kabbillion of them being a contractor and all.”

Seeew, ‘X’ marks the spot right on top of the blue tape in the garbage with that.

Now *turns and narrows eyes at you* that black rubber thing? Color me curious because it happens to be the bottom part of the heel to one of my favorite pairs of shoes. Why is this find concerning me? Well, I’ll tell you. Honey was supposed to have taken that piece of rubber, along with my shoes to the repair store AND not to be too suspicious about all this, but he’s been hedging about repair timeframe whenever I ask on the ETA of my shoes being returned to me.

*Shakes head*

What does this find tell me? The freaking guy thinks he lost the piece and he doesn’t know how to admit it to me.

Perfect. So this item? Imma keeping it for future blackmail purposes.

*Moves along*

The keychain medallion thing? I have no idea what that is, so I put it and the blue thing in the basket that houses all our mystery household items. The collection of which is impressive. Trust me.

And then?

Score!

Two twenties and a Ten. Oh, sure there’s some loose coins which I later deemed to be very useful when Honey finally got home, but a cool 50 bucks? Yeah.

*Smiles gleefully, prepared to whistle a jaunty tune and walk off when I notice how solemn you are. It’s your quizzical silence that makes me stop and turn to look at you*

Oh, don’t give me that face. What? *cups hand to ear to better hear you* You guys want to know how coins were useful? Simple. When Honey got home yesterday I told him I found some money while I was doing his laundry. I held out that loose change and asked him if he wanted it back.

What did he do?

He perused the meager coins in my palm and said, “No, babe. You keep it.”

What did I do?

I made sure he saw my wide-eyed and innocent expression. “Are you sure?”

Of course, he said yes, but before you call me out for being a complete and utter sneaky rat for not including the bills, remember one thing. I know the man like the back of my hand. The minute he thought he’d lost the piece to my shoe he didn’t bother taking my beloved’s to the repair place. He probably ditched them and is only waiting for the right time to tell me about the tragedy.

Moral of the story? I’m using his fifty bucks – and then some – to eventually replace my much-beloved gear once he comes clean about what he did.

Men!!!

But hey, you notice this laundry story is all about clean. First, his clothes being cleaned before he will have to come clean and tell me about my shoes!

Interesting eh…?

As always, thanks for stopping by!

Riley

Up next I will be listing winners of the flipping the bird hook and the build-a-giveaway. I will also be sharing my cover of PERMIT ME! This is Caleb and Genevieve’s story!

 

 

 

 

 

IT’S A TOPSY-TURVY WORLD OUT THERE…

Before I tell you about the latest Honeyism, I wanted to let those of you know who read my books, that there’s a brand new one nearly ready for release! This is Caleb and Genevieve’s story. That’s pronounced Jen-vee-ev, but he call’s her Frenchie, because she is. Well, he also calls her Geneva, like the convention, and you’ll have to read the book to find out why.

Hm. You Don’t Say…

You’re going to have to picture this. Honey and I get into bed last night and after a couple of minutes I say, “Did you leave the pool pump running?”

This is one of those things I’ve asked him not to do at night because every time the vacuum gets hooked up against one of the walls I hear gurgling and immediately wake up thinking something has fallen into the pool.

Something like what, you may ask?

Well, since we’ve lived in this house we’ve had three rabbits, 5 possums if you count the fact that it was the same baby one three different times, a cat, a bird and I don’t even want to talk about the snakes. You know? Now that I think about it. We’ve had more wildlife find their way into our currently screened-in pool then we did for the eight years we lived in a house that had a pool with no screen. That’s weird. But anyways, this is the conversation that follows.

Honey doesn’t move. He’s lying face down next to me with his head turned away as he replied, “Yeah, I left it on.”

I frown at the ceiling. “But you know I don’t like it running during the night.”

He doesn’t miss a beat. “No. That’s your husband who knows that. I’m the other guy.”

There’s me, blink, blink. “Other guy?”

His voice is gravelly so I know he’s close to falling asleep when sighs. “The new boyfriend you’re trying to impress by not nagging him to death to do shit like this for you.”

Imagine my eyes narrow as I look right at you. To death? Can you spell drama queen? But then if he were the boyfriend wouldn’t he be trying to impress me with his sexual prowess?

After I explained all this to him and he didn’t budge or reply, I was curious.

“So if you’re a new boyfriend staying at my house when my husband is away why aren’t we doing the horizontal Mumba right now? Isn’t that why you’re here?

“Nope. I came for the comfortable bed. Unfortunately, I wasn’t told about the magpie that resided in it.”

Aaaand, I hit him with a pillow. When that got his attention and he turned, coming up on an elbow to look down at me, I said, “Having a new boyfriend sucks. I much prefer my husband.”

That’s when he grinned. “It would seem my work here is done.”

I waited until he settled back down with his head on the pillow before I shot that smarmy comment out of the water, “Not yet, Bucko. You still have to go turn off the pool pump.”

Haha! In the end, he didn’t leave the bed at all…but I was okay with that. Really okay, actually.

YAY! ADDING TO OUR GIVEAWAY BECAUSE “THE WILD ONE” IS #3 ON AMAZON’S KINDLE WORLD TOP 100!!!

So excited about this one! Ben and Daisy are a lot of smexy fun together!

Now for adding to our giveaway. If you didn’t see the Romeo pillow check it out here.

For those of you haven’t read this one, Romeo is Daisy’s naughty little chihuahua. He’s a bad little boy sometimes, but he’s so cute. See…

And here’s what we’re going to add to our giveaway! A 25.00 Amazon giftcard.

A 25.00 Amazon giftcard.

If you’ve read The Wild One I hope you enjoyed it. And if you haven’t read it yet, I hope you will!

Oh, and an update about the fickle finger’s fate. Honey installed this:

just inside my closet door. Actually, I use it to hang my purse on. I had been getting into a bad habit of leaving my purse in the kitchen or on the hall bench. So it’s a win/win. This way he doesn’t have to look at the finger (that he said was NOT going into our newly remodelled bathroom) and I get to keep it now that it’s been banished to the closet. I happen to love it there, so it all worked out…of course, he hasn’t seen what I bought to replace this. *Twirls handlebar mustache just before I tie him to the tracks* I’m not sure how the new item is going to go down…but you know me. I’ll spill all the beans to you once I have them. Hehhehheh. Can’t wait.

Thanks for stopping by!

Riley

Yay! THE WILD ONE MADE AMAZON’S TOP 100 IN ROMANCE!!! AND AIRING ONE’S DIRTY LAUNDRY!!!

I miss Ben and Daisy, but I’m so glad readers are enjoying them! I want to thank the readers who have emailed or reached out to me on Facebook to let me know how they enjoyed the story. I especially want to that those readers who have posted reviews on Amazon! I greatly appreciate you taking the time.

Okay, with that said, I did want to mention something I spoke about on Facebook. (I know a lot of you maybe aren’t on Facebook so I wanted to share this here as people are asking for an update and it’s easier doing it here.) Why are they asking? Because it’s about Honey of course. *shakes head* Here is the original post:

Things are very interesting around the house today. Honey is home and he’s doing laundry. >:0 I can’t wait to tell him what a phenomenal job he’s done – even if my clothes are ruined. Signed Riley who intends never to do laundry again in her life! *Shush* Don’t tell…

Well… *looks right at you* He did all the laundry and…? Sure, my blouse was shrunk, my jeans were left crinkled beyond being me simply re-fluffing them to wear, the socks didn’t match. *Tilts head at you* In fact, I found one in the garbage and had to ask.

“Babe why is this perfectly good sock in the trash?”

He doesn’t miss a beat. “Dryer ate the other one so its widow is toast.”

*Le sigh* I thought he was just trying to get me to complain, but then later I saw he’d used the match to effing stain one of the deck boards he’s planning to use to fix the secret patio decking! Dryer ate it, my ass! This is when it came to me that him doing the laundry could be somewhat of a challenge for me for other reasons than I thought. I’ll have to keep an eye out. That man!

*Pauses here to think for a moment and then remembers*

Oh, yeah. He also washed the whites first and used the automatic bleach dispenser. Then he washed our darks immediately afterward. I had to pull out the duct tape to keep quiet over that one. I’m totally amazed there wasn’t some problem with the dark load, but no. *wipes brow* there wasn’t. I will tell you what the whole experience was, though.

MUSICAL!

Between the loads being off balance so the machines pounded and shook to some jaunty tunes, and the shite he leaves in his pockets and apparently doesn’t care that they rattle around in the dryer? (I always stop the loads if I’ve missed something and collect the nuts, screws, morets, safety pins, batteries, tools, wallet, golf balls, golf tees, rubber bands, paper towels…Yeah, unfortunately, I could go one, but I won’t.) I couldn’t hear myself think straight. But I ask you. Did I complain?

NO WAY!

Heheheh. Guess who is out of laundry duty this weekend. Go on, I dare you. guess.

*Imagine me raising my arms in the air and twirling around as I fairly burst with joy* Me! Me! Me!

Right on. Oh, sure. I may be reduced to wearing my PJ’s to do the grocery shopping by Thursday but it will be worth it!

I shall keep you posted on this. And next up we’ll be adding to our build-a-giveaway. Stay tuned…

Thanks for stopping by!

Riley

THE WILD ONE

Meet The Wild One!

 

Do you like?

Oh, and I’ll be adding to our giveaway on Tuesday! 08.02.16!

Thanks for stopping by!

Riley

***New Release News***, a build-a-giveaway, and Honey…

 

Ben and Daisy’s story is part of the fabulous Desiree Holt’s Bestselling Team Omega series!

The Wild One will release the 2nd of August!!! This is Daisy and Ben’s story and if you want to read an excerpt of some of the first chapter *leans in to whisper* it’s pretty funny, I’ve posted it below. You’ll also see that I posted a link to a Facebook page that you can click on if you’d like to read more of the excerpt and be entered into a giveaway there as well. I will be inviting the people following that thread on Facebook to join us here too, since I’m doing these two build-a-giveaways at the same time.

Now, for the first item to put into our build-a-giveaway on the blog.

I love this! It’s a 16 X 16 pillow!  Actually, I adore Romeo who is the heroine’s naughty Chihuahua. Let’s just say, he’s the boss until Ben…Okay, here’s the back of the pillow. Enough said, right? Hahaha!

As usual, if you’re a subscriber you are automatically entered in for one chance to win, but if you leave comments during our giveaway building blog posts your name gets added into the hat each time for numerous chances to win. The drawing(s) will come to a close at the end of August. That way, we’ll have plenty of awesome items for the winner(s), right? Goes without saying, but I will. When I post in the group on Facebook you’ll need to leave comments there for more chances too. The items will be different in both giveaways – and it is possible that one winner could win both giveaways because I checked the rule book and there is nothing that says this can’t happen.

About The Wild One. This book is filled with a lot of sexy fun. There’s a mystery that gets fully resolved and a big happily ever after because I think we all need one this summer. Ben and Daisy are so much fun. They steam up the pages and made me laugh more than once. I hope you guys enjoy their story!

Speaking of stories…

Honey, Honey, HONEY!

As most of you know, I hate doing laundry. I don’t know why I just do. And who knows this fact probably better than me? Honey. So here’s a random conversation over coffee the other morning.

I was thinking about the walk-in closet remodel that we are close to finishing up, so I asked him, “Did you get a chance to go through those clothes I put out for you in the spare room?”

He nodded “I did. And there’s a strange thing about those dress shirts.”

Now I must pause here in the telling of this little tête-à-tête because Honey doesn’t like dress shirts. I happen to love them on him with the sleeves rolled up when he’s wearing jeans.

Him? He likes his T-shirts and golf shirts. Which are okay too, but not as okay as the dress shirts and jeans are to me sometimes. *sigh* Anyways, this is important to know because…

I lift a brow and stare at him querying, “Oh?”

“Yeah. They all fit me great everywhere but in the arms. Either they’re too tight or too short.” He does a chopping motion to indicate the middle of his forearm and says, “Most of them were up to here.”

By now I already know where he’s going with this. He’s bagged all the dress shirts he never liked. The black and white paisley one I absolute love on him. The deep purple one he says he looks like an asshole in. The—yeah, I could go on, but I’m sure you don’t want to hear all my domestic fashion trials with him, so suffice it to say, Honey has found the perfect time to get what he wants without pissing me off.

Or so he thinks…

“Wow.” I shook my head as if he’d just shared the worst tragedy. “Short sleeves, huh? Maybe it’s not the sleeves being short. Maybe it’s your arms being freakishly long.”

The bugger didn’t even blink when he drawled, “And here I was trying to take the heat off the situation when we both know what the problem really is.”

I tilted my head and said in a voice that I hoped conveyed how careful he should be going forward. “And what would be this real problem you speak of?”

“Your, ah, less than stellar laundry ethics.”

Ethics? LMAO! I think he means efforts.

OMG! I nearly fell off the couch. If you guys knew how long I’ve waited to hear those words *insert me counting on my finger and toes here only, drat! There’s not enough of them* just so I could finally say, “I’m not going to argue with you about that, babe. I fully concede. You’d do a much better job than me, so have at it.”

How did he respond? He laughed.

*Looks right at you* I wonder if he’ll be laughing when he realizes I’m dead serious.

You Gave Me A Rating Of One Star? WTF?!!!!

 

Never mind that I worked hard.

I tried my best.

I sweated.

Toiled.

Cursed occasionally.

But?

I hung in there and that should have counted, right?

RIGHT?

*Insert me putting my hands in the air in defeat here* Because all that stuff I previously mentioned isn’t right. At least not according to Honey. You see, he didn’t care whether I stood out in a hundred and fifty degree heat holding his stupid wood. *Wags a finger at you* Not the good wood either. I know what you’re thinking. But alas, this was actual wood that he measured and cut on the back deck with his huge table saw for the valance box I designed for our bedroom.

My job was simple. Hold the panel stable and when I finished doing that, and after I was salt and peppered with sawdust, he laughed his ass off. Then my job was to keep the valance box steady while he screwed it up over our bedroom slider. *Looks right at you* He took his time, guys. Which, you know, wouldn’t have been so bad if I was six feet tall. Hell, if I was five and a half feet tall I wouldn’t have had to stand on my tip-toes. But there I was. Teetering. And what did he do when I complained? He took his sweet time getting to putting those screws in.

Seriously.

Here’s the conversation.

Me being not patient at all. “Could you hurry up with the screws? My arms are aching.”

Him being very patient. “I’m going as fast as I can. At least you’re not frying out in that hundred and fifty degree heat for five whole minutes.”

Side-eyes you. Yeah, maybe I shouldn’t have complained about that inconvenience so loudly. It wasn’t exactly a hundred and fifty degrees and my five minutes was nothing to his most of the day. But still, I felt I needed to warn him.

“I’m going to drop it.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I am.”

“No.”

Did I mention the guy can aggravate the frigging crap out of me in a millisecond when he wants to? Today he definitely wanted to. So I decide to change the course of the argument. Clearly, I wasn’t going to win this one.

It was time to put him on the defensive. “What did you do to my navy blue towels?”

Finally, he used his screw gun and zipped in a screw. Bingo. He didn’t want to talk about the wrecked terry…but I did.

“You know, a strange thing happened. After my shower yesterday when I got out and wrapped one of those blue towels around me, I nearly cut myself.”

He screwed in the second screw so that the one side was secured and then came and took the valance box weight from me. *Hikes a brow at you* Hm. Oddly enough, he still hadn’t answered my question.

I didn’t move. “Aren’t you going to tell me what you did to them?”

He looked down and it was almost comical. I was standing right at his underarm while he was looking guilty as sin. “I don’t have any idea.” No wonder he was looking guilty. He was lying through his teeth, so I decided to help him out.

“No idea, huh? Let me put it to you this way. When I exfoliate I like to do that under the shower spray. Not when I get out of the shower and I’m drying myself off with one of my good towels. What did you get all over them? Concrete?”

*Points right at you* I’m not exaggerating here when I say my soft beach size towels had hardened  balls and smears of stone-type crap all over them.

The bugger grinned and I really got mad because the action made me not want to be mad at him at all. But then he said, “Not concrete. Drywall compound.”

*Tilts head at you* Like there’s a difference?

“Do you know how much those towels cost?”

“No, Riley, I do not.” He turned his attention to getting the last two screws fastened and I heard him mumble, “But you’re probably going to tell me.”

Oh hell, yeah I was. “Twenty-eight dollars each.” I pulled that sum right out of thin air purposely making it an odd amount, in the hopes that hitting him in the wallet would cause him to think twice about grabbing any kind of a towel out of the folded laundry and taking it to work with him to be ruined anytime the mood struck him.

He grunted, so I had to add.

“And that was when they were on sale. They aren’t any more so you’ll be paying full price for them when you replace them. Hey.” I stepped back and took a gander. “The valance box looks great! 5 stars.”

“Thanks. And you get a one.”

I shot a look at him. “Star?”

He nodded. “You started at five today but I subtracted one every time you complained. Therefore it’s one star for you today, babe.”

I was just about to open my mouth and tell him what I thought about that, but he annoyingly held up his drill in front of his mouth as if the drill bit was his index finger in the age old signal for me to be quiet.

I blinked and then scowled, when he said, “You have one star left. I wouldn’t want you to lose it.”

*Turns to look at you* Can you believe this guy?

*Shakes head*

Tomorrow we start building the closet. Can’t. Wait.

I will leave you with this. Yesterday Honey and I had a discussion about a towel hook for our master bath. I know, it’s just a hook, but it’s really not. It will have a prominent placement in the space and I was trying to be nice when I included Honey in the choice. Normally I just purchase the items and then say, “Hang this there, please.”

Well? I should have known better. He looked at all my choices (there were some really great ones. A huge cast iron whale tail? Come on, how cute is that?) and he turned his nose up at all of them. Then he points to one on the screen and asks, “How about that one?”

The one in question was a frigging plain old hook. You could even see where the screws were that held it together and where they would go on the wall once it was up. If that wasn’t bad enough it was two dollars and the caption actually read “Hook for garage storage.”

When I innocently pointed out that all his taste was in his mouth and he made some really, really, rude suggestion about what I could do with my mouth, LMAO over that one, I told him to quit with the dirty talking and to be serious. We needed to find something that was unique and functional. To which he said, “I’m not the designer. Knock yourself out. Buy whatever you want, and I’ll hang it.”

So what did I do? Why I simply decided to take him at his word. I can’t wait until he gets a load of this.

Bahahahaha! I bought it and this is going to be our new towel/robe hook in our nicely remodeled bathroom. Do you like it?

I am so bad! But hey, I think this one will make a statement and look good. And if it’s nice quality this hook may find its way into one of my giveaways!!! I’ll be posting about the next one soon.