Edward Lorn's Blog, page 101

E. Sang Dat – Awful Waffle

It’s only good when you’re drunk.

This is all one take. No cuts, edits, or retries. You get what you get.

E.

E. Sang Dat – PetSmart

Give me something to sing. No, really, I’ll sing anything. Websites, grocery lists, recipes, instruction manuals.

New video every two or three days.

E.

Storytelling is…

Storytelling is a passion. Writing is a practice. Words are tools. Literacy is choice.

~Edward Lorn

Ruminating On: Condoning Racism with Paula Deen

I’m back. Buckle up, folks.

I was going to let this one go by the wayside, simply turn my head and walk away, but I can’t do it. Nope. Nuh uh. The most recent offense I’ve come across regarding Paula Deen and her epic douchebaggery is a simple hastag: #teampaula. On Facebook, I posted a status update, which read, “#teampaula … You have to be kidding me? More like #teamcondoningracism .“  That’s what this is. You damaged sycophants understand that, right? Who am I kidding? Of course you don’t. So let me have a word with you. No, keep reading. When I’m done here, I want you in the comments section, defending yourself. I promise to allow all posts.

Let me first provide a rebuttal for your predictable defense of this twit. Paula Deen admitted to everything. She even apologized. So, please, don’t give me “This is just the word of a disgruntled employee.” If they are  “disgruntled,” they have a damn good reason to be. Imagine working for Deen and her brother, Bubba; the sexual harassment, being called their “little monkey”, hearing a slew of other racist and anti-semantic jokes, just to name a few. Wouldn’t you be a little perturbed?

I’m not blowing anything out of proportion here. This is a big deal, kids. Anyone who can use the N word so flippantly does not deserve the public spotlight. Her age shouldn’t be used as a shield, either. There are many persons over sixty who would never think to utter the word, not even in private company. And if you’re sitting at home, shrugging, thinking, “We’ve all said it,” you’re part of the problem. What Paula Deen did was inexcusable in this day and age. Just because she’s ten years and two Twinkies shy of a nursing home doesn’t mean she gets to say whatever the hell she wants without repercussions. She screwed the pooch. Let her take her lashings. She was allowed her freedom of speech, but that doesn’t protect her from the backlash.

The lines we draw between us have a great deal to do with what’s wrong with the world. I’m not the first person to say we’re all the same, but I will repeat it until my dying day. We are no different. It’s a goddamn shame that the only time we come together in this country is when someone decides to explode a bomb during a marathon or fly planes into our buildings. Every other day, we’re at each other’s throats, trying to make it obvious that we’re so damn different. How? How are we different? Skin color doesn’t matter. Religion really doesn’t fucking matter. And politics is nothing but a fallacy measuring contest with the prize going to the best liar.

I’m fed up with people condoning racism. It is what it is. It’s the tolerance of intolerance. You’re not better than someone just because you were born paler, or richer, or straight. You’re nothing but a walking, talking sack of flesh, blood, and bones, just like me. For her to say, “It’s just something people my age were raised saying,” is a travesty. My message to her is this: Do not lump yourself in with the likes of my mother, who is your age. Mom is sixty-six. I’ve never heard the word slip from her mouth, not even to describe someone else saying it. Not all southerners are inherently racist. People like you are the reason people mock those that live south of the Mason/Dixon line. You’re high class trash, the equivalent of taking a shit in a bucket of Kaluga River Caviar.

Paula Deen does need not a team, nor does she deserve support. She deserves to go away.

E.

“What shamed hi…

“What shamed him was not that he was, as his doctor said, morbidly obese (what a qualifier, “morbidly,” as if at a certain point, being overweight were morally similar to necrophilia).”

NOS4A2, by Joe Hill.

Red Adept Day of Drabbles

A bunch of Red Adept Publishing authors and myself decided to drabble all over ourselves… That’s not quite right. Oh yeah! We decided it would be fun if we all wrote a drabble then did a blog hop of sorts. Under my 100 word story you will find links to the other authors’ work. I will be updating as they become available online.

Peace out!

Payback (August and Everything After)

By Edward Lorn

August sits on the boat dock, waiting, her feet playing figure eights in the water. Her legs are lavender, painted by the purple sky. The water is cool, soothing on a summer’s eve.

Her raven sits perched upon the piling to her right. He squawks, telling her stories she can hear, but not understand. His body is only an ink blot in the black. If not for his eyes, he would be invisible.

A face breaks the surface of the water. August pushes her ex back down with her heel. Soon, the gases will evacuate and he’ll sink for good.

Erica Lucke Dean’s Drabble

Harvey Chute’s Drabble

Stephen Kozeniewski’s Drabble

Jaime Leigh’s Drabble

Kimberly G. Giarratano’s Drabble

Hopelessly Demented – Episode #2

Eatable Insect Article: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2013/13/130514-edible-insects-entomophagy-science-food-bugs-beetles/

Cricket Stir-fry: http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/channel/doomsday-preppers/videos/cricket-stir-fry/

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@EdwardLorn

@LintBow

Hopelessly Demented Episode #1

Rat in the Toilet: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06…;

Follow us on Twitter:

@EdwardLorn

@LintBow

Ruminating On: Voice Versus Style

What’s the difference between voice and style? Not much, actually. And that’s why writers either confuse the two or see both as the same thing. Today I’m going to go over what I believe is the difference. This is not gospel, just me trying to explain the subtly of the line between the two.

First and foremost, I would like to go over why people confuse voice and style because I believe that factors into this equation. When you’re reading—unless you know the author’s actual vocal tonality—you’re probably reading it in your own voice, or whatever voice holds precedent over your thoughts, anyway. Because of this, many associate style as the author’s voice. It just makes sense. You’re not actually hearing it, you’re reading it, and so the only things you have to go off of are the writer’s words, their style.

So how does one find an author’s voice? Here’s where we get into the confusing meat and potatoes of today’s blog. Your voice is distinct to you. Those closest to you could probably pick your voice out of a crowd of people because they know you so well. Your voice is so unique that there is a program that can single you out, even if you try to disguise it. It’s like a DNA test for sounds. The FBI and other government agencies use this gadget to analyze phone calls. It’s pretty nifty. And yes, I just said “nifty”. I suppose it’s “swell” also, but that’s beside the point. Fast-forwarding out of my fifties-era dialect, I think that piece of technology is rather cool. In writing, your voice is your own, as well. You’re either born with it or your not. Here’s the kicker for me. Voice is usually judged over everything else. Is your voice grating or annoying? Is it smooth and dulcet? What I’m getting at is, if people don’t like your voice, there’s not shit you can do about it. One of the most commonplace complaints I hear from authors about their editors is that the crazy so and so edited out all their voice. Normally, this is untrue. What the author thinks is the editor cutting out their voice is usually just the editor trying to keep you from sounding uninformed. Or, in drastic cases, like a complete moron. What’s wrong is wrong. A dangling participle is not voice. It’s simply incorrect. Every other sentence ending in ellipses is not voice. It’s unneeded. Hopping from third person to first person in the same paragraph isn’t voice, either. That’s just plain bad writing. Sure, you can try and sound like someone else, but you’re only doing just that—you’re mimicking them. And mimicry is the failure of self.

So what the flying fornication is style? Well, if your voice is the tone of your speech, style is what you use when speaking. I’m talking word choices, vernacular, metaphors and similes, sentence structure, what you choose to describe and what you don’t, et cetera. The major difference is, with style you have a choice. In my case, my style changes from book to book. When I write a Larry Laughlin story, my sentences are very truncated, succinct and to the point. With my newest novel, Life After Dane, I used a bigger canvas with a broader pallet. Ella May Peters—the narrator of Life After Dane—has a reflective, genteel quality in the way she speaks. Larry is far more coarse and intimidating. No one will open Life After Dane and think it’s a Larry Laughlin book. I’ve read many articles on style that liken it to a person’s sense of style. I disagree with that statement on the grounds that someone’s sense of style is usually unique to them, whereas stylistic examples in writing vary a great deal because, as authors, we’re usually writing about characters with glaringly different approaches to their deliveries. I don’t know, I could be wrong, but that’s just the way I see it. (Let’s talk about it later. I live in the comment section.) Now, I have seen editors mangle style because of personal preference. If your editor changes, “He farted loudly,” to “He passed gas loudly,” you have an issue and should seek out an editor that understands you. But that’s not voice. It’s word choice. It’s style, cuz. Be about it.

In summation, your voice is your own, whereas style should be ever changing and evolving. You must alter your style to fit whatever project you’re working on, but people should know right away that you wrote it. It’s a difficult balancing act, but one that most authors just fall into over time. You find what works for you and you stick with it. It’s really that easy and that difficult, all at the same time. But if your voice is overall unpleasant, maybe you should taken up knitting. Just sayin’.

See you good people between the pages.

E.

 

 

 

Life After Dane Update

If you’ve been following the progress on my new novel, Life After Dane, I have some news for you. Initially, I believed the book was coming Fall 2013. Well, that’s all changed now. Red Adept Publishing announced yesterday that Dane will be available on July 15th of this year.

I know I’ve been beating you over the head with news about this book, so I thought I would explain my enthusiasm a bit. With Bay’s End and Dastardly Bastard, I was still finding my footing. In Hope for the Wicked, I started crafting a new style, one that would become complete during the writing of Dane. Though I do not regret or dislike any of my published work (let me be perfectly clear on that point), I do think that Life After Dane is far superior to my previous ventures. The words “Best Yet” get loosely tossed around every time an author releases a new book. But, this time around, it’s the truth. Never have I been thisproud to put my name on a piece of writing. Life After Dane is my voice. It is Edward Lorn. And that makes me very excited indeed.

Click on the book cover below to read an excerpt of Life After Dane.