Jay Earley's Blog, page 7
September 23, 2011
Need Denying Pattern
Need Denying Pattern If you have the Need Denying Pattern, this means that you either close off your needs, or you don't fully express them. Instead, you shut down your normal needs for love, affection, sex, caring, sharing, etc. Or you might just shut down your needs in one of these areas. You pretend to [...]
September 13, 2011
People Pleasing vs Assertiveness
People Pleasing Description If you have a People Pleasing Pattern, you have a tendency to over-please people to make them happy. You often try to be who other people want you to be, to agree with them, to fit in. You try to make yourself think, feel, and want the same things as others even [...]
August 16, 2011
Fall IFS Classes
IFS Exiles Telephone Class Taught by Jay Earley Tuesdays 4:30-6:30pm pacific (7:30-9:30pm eastern) Sept. 13 – Oct. 18 (6 weeks) Cost: $230 Inner Critic Telephone Class Taught by Bonnie Weiss Wednesdays 4:30-6:30pm pacific (7:30-9:30pm eastern) Sept. 28 – Nov. 2 (6 weeks) Cost: $230 Advanced Polarization Telephone Class For IFS therapists Taught by Jay Earley [...]
August 11, 2011
A Story of the Conflict Avoiding Pattern and the Challenge Capacity
I have been sending out articles on various dimensions the Pattern Systemsm. This article describes the Conflict Avoiding Pattern, and then tells the story of Jenny, who had this pattern. Then it describes the Challenge Capacity, which is what is needed to break free from the Conflict Avoiding Pattern, and relates how Jenny developed it. [...]
August 9, 2011
Which IFS Classes Do You Want, and When?
We have been teaching the same IFS classes at the same times for a few years now. We would like to expand our offerings and the times and days they are offered. So we need your input. Please take our survey by clicking here. You can tell us which classes you want to take (besides [...]
August 2, 2011
Finding an IFS Partner for Peer Counseling
We have now created a free website where you can find people to pair up with for doing IFS peer counseling. Click on http://www.personal-growth-programs.c.... This is for people who have taken our IFS classes, who have read my book Self-Therapy, or who know IFS in some other way. If you are looking for people to [...]
July 28, 2011
Inner Critic Questionnaire Now on Facebook
The Inner Critic is the part of you that judges you, demeans you, and pushes you to do things. It tends to make you feel bad about yourself. Many of you know that we created an Inner Critic questionnaire over a year ago, which shows which of the seven types of Inner Critics are a [...]
June 21, 2011
A Story about the Dependent Pattern and the Self-Support Capacity
I have been sending out articles on various dimensions the Pattern System. This article describes one particular pattern in the Intimacy Dimension, the Dependent Pattern, and then tells the story of Dan, who had this pattern. Then it describes the Self-Support Capacity, which is what is needed to break free from the Dependent Pattern, and [...]
May 11, 2011
The Power Dimension
In the Power Dimension of the Pattern System, there are two healthy capacities that complement each other-Assertiveness and Cooperation. Assertiveness means the ability to think and act for yourself and to exert power to get what you want, protect yourself, or achieve what you think is right. Cooperation means the ability to be receptive and [...]
May 9, 2011
The Power of Social Media: Getting the conversation started continued
In March I posted a conversation between myself and a friend on facebook. Since the post we have gone back and forth and I wanted to share the rest of the conversation with you. To see the original post, click here. I would love feedback or comments about how you feel on the matter. Comment: [...]
