Really Rashida's Blog, page 18
August 6, 2011
Displaced Anger: Andre's Story (FROM BRUISES TO BEAUTY)
Some of the toughest men on the outside are the most cowardly on the inside. Andre wanted to be the tough guy very badly but he just had too much bitch in his heart to do so. On the other hand, when the target is fragile and vulnerable, his manhood kicks right in...
Andre paced back and forth nervously as he waited in the parking lot of Louis Pasteur Elementary school. "It's dark as hell out here." he snapped as he peered up at the abandoned building. He shuddered at the sight. Andre shifted his weight as he leaned on the hood of his car. The faint scent of urine crept into his nostrils thanks to the eerie breeze that blew softly. The fence had been taken over by foliage so the plant life made it look more like a giant wall of leaves. Andre quickly scanned the fence with his eyes making sure that no one was around.
"This nigga need to hurry the fuck up!" Andre thought aloud. He pulled out his cell phone and checked the time. 11:53 pm. Monty was 23 minutes late. Andre started for the driver's side door. He was going to get in and call to see what was taking Monty so long when he saw headlights shining in the distance. Andre was relieved at the sight of Monty's car pulling into the parking lot.
Monty parked next to Andre's car, turned his engine off, then got out to meet him.
"'Bout damn time, nigga!" Andre laughed then reached out to give Monty dap.
"Man, shut yo scary ass up." Monty replied. He looked down at Andre's hand, then up at him, and finally waved him off declining Andre's handshake.
Embarassed, Andre filled with anger. Checking Monty would only cause him problems so he ignored the disrespect and got down to business. "Where that bread at?" Andre asked. He was ready to get his money and get the hell out of that dark ass parking lot.
"I ain't got it, Dre. I had some shit to take care of real quick. I'ma get it to you next week."
"What the fuck?! Naw, nigga. I need my shit now. Come up off my ends, bruh." Andre demanded then stepped to Monty's face.
"I said I'll give it to you next week! Either that or you won't get shit. What it's gon' be?" Monty's tone of voice was serious and stern. The look on his face meant business.
Andre knew that Monty would put a bullet in a muthafucka quick and he wasn't trying to get popped. He backed up a little and calmed down. :"What day next week?" he asked.
"I'll call you. Tuesday and let you know."
"Aight. Just hit me up." Andre said disappointed.
"Aight. It's on, my nigga." Monty said then got in his car and left.
Andre got in his car and banged his hands on the steering wheel. "Fuck!" he screamed. "I can't believe I keep lettin' that hoe ass nigga play me!" Andre slammed his hands against the steering wheel again. "Next time he gon' have to pay me upfront! That nigga gets no more credit!" He continued to scream. Then he started the car and headed to his mom's house.
He called her first to make sure she would be awake when he got there.
Pat answered after a few rings. "Hello?" she said sleepily.
"Ma, you woke? I'm 'bout to come over there."
"No, baby I'm in the bed. What's wrong?" Pat could hear the tension in her son's voice.
"This nigga Monty late wit my ends again. I need $150 til next week. I'm 'bout to come get it." Andre told her.
"I don't have it on me right now, Dre. I'll go to the bank in the morning and get it before I go to work." she said and yawned. "I'll call you when I get up."
"No, Ma! I want it tonight." Andre said. The little boy in him came out.
"I don't have it."
"Well, let me come get your ATM card and go get it myself." he pleaded.
"No! I'm not about to give you my damn ATM card. Take your ass to sleep, boy. I'll call you in the morning, okay?"
Andre pouted a little bit. He hated being told no, but he couldn't convince his mother to do what he asked. "Okay, Ma. Talk to you tomorrow." he said and hung up.
"Ugh!" he screamed in frustration. He wouldn't be getting any money that night so he made a U-turn and went home.
Tracey was waiting up for him. She was on the couch watching TV when Andre came in and slammed the door behind him. Startled, Tracey jumped a little bit. "What's wrong with you?" she asked.
Andre ignored her and stormed into the kitchen. There were a few pans soaking in the sink. "What the fuck is these dishes doin' in the sink?!" he yelled.
"They had food dried up in them. I was gonna wash 'em before I went to bed." Tracey called in to him.
Andre went back into the living room, snatched Tracey up, and slapped her across the face. "Get in there and wash 'em NOW!" he yelled at her.
Tracey grabbed her face and started to cry. "Okay." she sobbed.
"Hurry up!" he said then went upstairs to take a shower.
Andre paced back and forth nervously as he waited in the parking lot of Louis Pasteur Elementary school. "It's dark as hell out here." he snapped as he peered up at the abandoned building. He shuddered at the sight. Andre shifted his weight as he leaned on the hood of his car. The faint scent of urine crept into his nostrils thanks to the eerie breeze that blew softly. The fence had been taken over by foliage so the plant life made it look more like a giant wall of leaves. Andre quickly scanned the fence with his eyes making sure that no one was around.
"This nigga need to hurry the fuck up!" Andre thought aloud. He pulled out his cell phone and checked the time. 11:53 pm. Monty was 23 minutes late. Andre started for the driver's side door. He was going to get in and call to see what was taking Monty so long when he saw headlights shining in the distance. Andre was relieved at the sight of Monty's car pulling into the parking lot.
Monty parked next to Andre's car, turned his engine off, then got out to meet him.
"'Bout damn time, nigga!" Andre laughed then reached out to give Monty dap.
"Man, shut yo scary ass up." Monty replied. He looked down at Andre's hand, then up at him, and finally waved him off declining Andre's handshake.
Embarassed, Andre filled with anger. Checking Monty would only cause him problems so he ignored the disrespect and got down to business. "Where that bread at?" Andre asked. He was ready to get his money and get the hell out of that dark ass parking lot.
"I ain't got it, Dre. I had some shit to take care of real quick. I'ma get it to you next week."
"What the fuck?! Naw, nigga. I need my shit now. Come up off my ends, bruh." Andre demanded then stepped to Monty's face.
"I said I'll give it to you next week! Either that or you won't get shit. What it's gon' be?" Monty's tone of voice was serious and stern. The look on his face meant business.
Andre knew that Monty would put a bullet in a muthafucka quick and he wasn't trying to get popped. He backed up a little and calmed down. :"What day next week?" he asked.
"I'll call you. Tuesday and let you know."
"Aight. Just hit me up." Andre said disappointed.
"Aight. It's on, my nigga." Monty said then got in his car and left.
Andre got in his car and banged his hands on the steering wheel. "Fuck!" he screamed. "I can't believe I keep lettin' that hoe ass nigga play me!" Andre slammed his hands against the steering wheel again. "Next time he gon' have to pay me upfront! That nigga gets no more credit!" He continued to scream. Then he started the car and headed to his mom's house.
He called her first to make sure she would be awake when he got there.
Pat answered after a few rings. "Hello?" she said sleepily.
"Ma, you woke? I'm 'bout to come over there."
"No, baby I'm in the bed. What's wrong?" Pat could hear the tension in her son's voice.
"This nigga Monty late wit my ends again. I need $150 til next week. I'm 'bout to come get it." Andre told her.
"I don't have it on me right now, Dre. I'll go to the bank in the morning and get it before I go to work." she said and yawned. "I'll call you when I get up."
"No, Ma! I want it tonight." Andre said. The little boy in him came out.
"I don't have it."
"Well, let me come get your ATM card and go get it myself." he pleaded.
"No! I'm not about to give you my damn ATM card. Take your ass to sleep, boy. I'll call you in the morning, okay?"
Andre pouted a little bit. He hated being told no, but he couldn't convince his mother to do what he asked. "Okay, Ma. Talk to you tomorrow." he said and hung up.
"Ugh!" he screamed in frustration. He wouldn't be getting any money that night so he made a U-turn and went home.
Tracey was waiting up for him. She was on the couch watching TV when Andre came in and slammed the door behind him. Startled, Tracey jumped a little bit. "What's wrong with you?" she asked.
Andre ignored her and stormed into the kitchen. There were a few pans soaking in the sink. "What the fuck is these dishes doin' in the sink?!" he yelled.
"They had food dried up in them. I was gonna wash 'em before I went to bed." Tracey called in to him.
Andre went back into the living room, snatched Tracey up, and slapped her across the face. "Get in there and wash 'em NOW!" he yelled at her.
Tracey grabbed her face and started to cry. "Okay." she sobbed.
"Hurry up!" he said then went upstairs to take a shower.
August 1, 2011
The Beginning of the end. Tracey's story. (FROM BRUISES TO BEAUTY)
Tracey finds out that she's pregnant. She tells Andre that she doesn't want to keep the baby. He wants to know why, but she has a secret that won't let her tell him why.
"I promise!" Andre sobbed. He got down on his knees, wrapped his arms around Tracey's waist, and laid his head on her stomach. "Please, Tray, I promise. I'ma change. C'mon, please... Don't kill my baby Tracey!" Andre continued to cry. "Get off of me." Tracey replied and tried to push him away.~ Yes. Tracey was eight weeks pregnant and she had decided to get an abortion. She and Andre had only been dating for nine months and the last seven have been nothing short of a nightmare. Tracey had become a prisoner in her own home after two months of dating. Andre pushed his way in. He just showed up at her door with two garbage bags full of clothes and an XBox 360. Up until then, their relationship had been like a fairy tale. Andre was the most beartiful man she'd ever seen. He was mocha complected and looked a lot like the actor Morric Chesnut. He reminded her of Paul Owens, the cutest boy in her third grade class. She'd been lucky enough to be his girlfriend for one month that school year. And it made her feel so good because she was known as "Gappy Gappy Over Lappy" for her crooked teeth and large gap in the front two. He chose her despite her flaws. That's the feeling Andre gave her when he pursued her. The super handsome, popular dope boy picks the average skinny black girl with the gap in her teeth. So when Andre showed up on her doorstep, Tracey let him stay thinking this was the right thing for their relationship. After being there two days, she realized that she couldn't have been more wrong. That day she came home from working as an STNA in a nursing home and Andre instantly started arguing with her because he felt it took her too long to het home. This was the first of many fights Tracey would have to endure.~ "No, Dre! I said get off of me!" Tracey said and continued to pull his arms from around her waist. Andre tightened his grip. "I'm for real, Tray. Please! I won't ever put my hands on you like that again." Andre cried harder and tears streamed down his face wetting up Tracey's shirt. "Look at me! Look at my face! Look at all the bruises on my arms! I'm tired of this shit, Dre! I can't have no baby by you and you treat me like a damn punching bag!" Tracey said angrily. Andre looked up at her. She had a small bruise under her right eye from when he slapped her the night before. She'd made peas for dinner. He hated peas. "I'm sorry about all that. You know what I've been through watching my father beat the fuck out of my mother. I don't want to belike that. I wanna be better than that nigga! I can't do it without you though... And my baby. That's what's gon' make me change. Being a man formy family." Tracey looked into Andre's eyes. She'd never seen him like this before. So vulnerable. So hurt. She felt horrible watching him beg her to spare her child's life. Listening to him cry and plead with her enhanced the guilt that she was hiding inside. She wanted to be Andre's wife and the mother of his children. It's just that she made a terrible mistake and now she has to make it right. Andre couled never know her secret and the only way to ensure that was to get rid of this baby. "I can't..." Tracey said and began to cry. Andre stood up and grabbed Tracey tightly by her wrists. "Why not?" he growled. The expression on his face instantly chaged from sad to pissed off. "I'm not understanding you right now." he glared at her with daggers in his eyes. "Y-you won't..." she stammered. "I won't what?!" he snapped then tightened his grip on her wrists. Tracey was overwhelmed with fear. She had come to learn the sighns of Andre's rage. The look in his eyes, the tone of his voice. It all spelled trouble and Tracey was in no mood for fighting. "Okay, okay..." "Okay, what?" "I'll keep the baby."
"I promise!" Andre sobbed. He got down on his knees, wrapped his arms around Tracey's waist, and laid his head on her stomach. "Please, Tray, I promise. I'ma change. C'mon, please... Don't kill my baby Tracey!" Andre continued to cry. "Get off of me." Tracey replied and tried to push him away.~ Yes. Tracey was eight weeks pregnant and she had decided to get an abortion. She and Andre had only been dating for nine months and the last seven have been nothing short of a nightmare. Tracey had become a prisoner in her own home after two months of dating. Andre pushed his way in. He just showed up at her door with two garbage bags full of clothes and an XBox 360. Up until then, their relationship had been like a fairy tale. Andre was the most beartiful man she'd ever seen. He was mocha complected and looked a lot like the actor Morric Chesnut. He reminded her of Paul Owens, the cutest boy in her third grade class. She'd been lucky enough to be his girlfriend for one month that school year. And it made her feel so good because she was known as "Gappy Gappy Over Lappy" for her crooked teeth and large gap in the front two. He chose her despite her flaws. That's the feeling Andre gave her when he pursued her. The super handsome, popular dope boy picks the average skinny black girl with the gap in her teeth. So when Andre showed up on her doorstep, Tracey let him stay thinking this was the right thing for their relationship. After being there two days, she realized that she couldn't have been more wrong. That day she came home from working as an STNA in a nursing home and Andre instantly started arguing with her because he felt it took her too long to het home. This was the first of many fights Tracey would have to endure.~ "No, Dre! I said get off of me!" Tracey said and continued to pull his arms from around her waist. Andre tightened his grip. "I'm for real, Tray. Please! I won't ever put my hands on you like that again." Andre cried harder and tears streamed down his face wetting up Tracey's shirt. "Look at me! Look at my face! Look at all the bruises on my arms! I'm tired of this shit, Dre! I can't have no baby by you and you treat me like a damn punching bag!" Tracey said angrily. Andre looked up at her. She had a small bruise under her right eye from when he slapped her the night before. She'd made peas for dinner. He hated peas. "I'm sorry about all that. You know what I've been through watching my father beat the fuck out of my mother. I don't want to belike that. I wanna be better than that nigga! I can't do it without you though... And my baby. That's what's gon' make me change. Being a man formy family." Tracey looked into Andre's eyes. She'd never seen him like this before. So vulnerable. So hurt. She felt horrible watching him beg her to spare her child's life. Listening to him cry and plead with her enhanced the guilt that she was hiding inside. She wanted to be Andre's wife and the mother of his children. It's just that she made a terrible mistake and now she has to make it right. Andre couled never know her secret and the only way to ensure that was to get rid of this baby. "I can't..." Tracey said and began to cry. Andre stood up and grabbed Tracey tightly by her wrists. "Why not?" he growled. The expression on his face instantly chaged from sad to pissed off. "I'm not understanding you right now." he glared at her with daggers in his eyes. "Y-you won't..." she stammered. "I won't what?!" he snapped then tightened his grip on her wrists. Tracey was overwhelmed with fear. She had come to learn the sighns of Andre's rage. The look in his eyes, the tone of his voice. It all spelled trouble and Tracey was in no mood for fighting. "Okay, okay..." "Okay, what?" "I'll keep the baby."
