Dave Anderson's Blog, page 14

The General Discusses What Integrity Really Is

Integrity:  Doing what is good, right, and proper, even at personal cost.  That is the definition my father General James L. Anderson taught me years ago.

I had the opportunity to do a talk with my father on the topic of Courage in business. The Lesson: You can’t have Integrity without having Courage.

This video is a short segment of that talk where we focus on the topic of Integrity and what it means to be a person of Integrity.

Question:

What are you willing to sacrifice in order to be a person of Integrity?

Dave Anderson is coauthor of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home with his father General James L. Anderson (USA Retired).

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

The Confident Leader Vs. The Arrogant Leader

Martin’s reputation for arrogance preceded him. He was assigned to our leadership team whether we wanted him to be there or not.

I decided to ignore his reputation and form my own opinions about Martin. I never tried harder to like someone in my entire life.   Unfortunately, the rumors about Martin were accurate.

Confidence is a desirable trait in a leader. But Martin was not confident. He was flat out arrogant.

He Claimed To Be Confident

There were times when Martin seemed to let his guard down. In one of those moments, Martin stated, “I know some people don’t like me. People are always intimidated by confidence. They are just insecure.”

Ironically, I now conclude that Martin was one of the most insecure people I ever worked beside. Insecurity and arrogance often go hand in hand, while insecurity and confidence are opposites.

Three Signs Separating Confidence From Arrogance

An up and coming leader recently asked me how to avoid crossing the line between confidence and arrogance. What a great question! With some thought, I have narrowed it down to three things.

Humility

A confident leader does not see his mistakes as a sign of his weakness. He sees them as a sign of his humanity. He admits his mistakes to his superiors, his peers, his employees and his family.

The confident leader is secure enough to say, “It’s my fault. Please forgive me.” The arrogant leader may never say those words, because his insecurity won’t allow him to.

Click on the following blog title to read more about the relationship between confidence and humility:

Can Humility and Confidence Coexist?

Leaders, we should regularly ask ourselves:

“When was the last time I publicly admitted to my weaknesses or mistakes?”

Listening

A confident leader is a good listener. She is very comfortable being quiet and not always having center stage or getting the last word. She listens longer and asks more questions than others.

A confident leader is secure enough to ask for the opinions of others AND truly make changes based on the feedback of others. The arrogant leader may ask for other’s opinions, but rarely implements or even considers another person’s ideas or solutions.

In the end the arrogant leader may claim to listen to others, but more often then not, she is just preparing to make her own arguments.

Leaders, we should regularly ask ourselves:

“Am I really listening to others, or am I just waiting to talk?”

Growth

A confident leader is always growing. He is secure enough to know that he can and should gain wisdom from other people. He actively seeks new information and wise counsel.

The true mark of a confident leader is he is not the same leader he was twelve months ago. The arrogant leader is stagnant. His way of leading does not change, and he may even boast about that.

In the end, the arrogant leader gets left behind because the confident leaders are secure enough to believe they still have a lot to learn and want to truly get better at their craft.

Leaders, we should regularly ask ourselves:

“What have I done to become a better version of myself in the last twelve months?”

The Bottom Line:

People are inspired by confidence and repelled by arrogance. Martin felt like people were repelled by his confidence. But, what he demonstrated was arrogance. Martin did not see – or maybe did not want to see – the difference.

As leaders, if we want to display the confidence that attracts others. The best way we can demonstrate that confidence is through humility, listening and growth.

If I see a leader who can openly own her weaknesses, truly listens to others and is on a consistent pursuit to become a better leader and a better person, I will follow her to hell and back.

That’s the type of confidence I want in a leader. That’s the type of confidence Martin was missing. It is also the type of confidence that our superiors, our peers, our employees and our families want to follow.

Question:

Who is the most confident and humble leader you have ever met?

Dave Anderson is author of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home.

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

 

The Character Workout for Leaders

You have to DO what you want to BE!  If you want to BE a Leader of Character, you have to DO what Leaders of Character DO!

Today’s video was a short talk given to over 800 people at this year’s Leadercast event.

Question:

What do you need to start DOing to BE the Leader of Character you were designed to BE?

Dave Anderson is author of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home.

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

Hire and Fire For Values – Part 2 Firing

It takes a lot of work to fire someone these days.  Our friends in the legal profession have made the process of firing employees incredibly time consuming.  For some leaders, this process is a disincentive for doing the right thing.

When a leader  allows a low performer to stay, that leader is failing.  In the same way a leader who keeps a person who displays disdain for the organization’s values due to this legal disincentive is failing as well.

Hiring For Values (previous blog) is a critical first step for leaders who believe in the values they claim.  An equally important step is being willing to Fire For Values as well.

An Example of Firing For Values

Sticking with integrity, honesty, or character, example we discussed in Part 1 of this series – knowing whom to fire is easier than doing it.

Example:

A sales leader calls an employee and hears a Walmart announcement in the background.  When asked, the sales representative apologizes for forgetting to inform the leader of a paid day off they intended to take.

If I believe in the values of my company, I go on high alert.  This is probably not the first time this person went on a shopping spree during work hours.  Do I fire them right away?

No.  This time they get a warning.  The next time, they should get a pink slip.  In between, I am going to start reviewing reports, projects and other resources to be sure I have not missed similar behaviors in past.

Firing For Values

Hiring For Values is the first step.  Communicating and demonstrating that a team’s values are valuable is the second step.  But neither of these will mean much if a leader does not have the courage to fire people who display their disdain for those values. 

For example, if I claim character, initiative, courage, perseverance and humility as values, I need to be willing to remove people from the team who do not exhibit these values.

I must ask myself:

Character:  If I catch them in a lie, do I have the courage to fire them?
Initiative:  If I consistently have to prompt them to take action, do I have the courage to fire them?
Courage:  If they do not report a moral failure of a coworker, do I have the courage to fire them?
Perseverance:  If they consistently give up when they encounter a little difficulty, do I have the courage to fire them?
Humility:  If they consistently push back against coaching and refuse to change, do I have the courage to fire them?

Granted, an issue of incompetence is easy to identify and quantify.  An issue of misaligned values will likely take some documentation and courage on the leader’s part.  It is not easy, but it is worth it!

Some documentation tips can be found in a previous blog:  7 Documentation Tips Learned The Hard Way.

The Bottom Line:

One of my roles as a leader is to establish, reinforce and protect the values of my organization.  Hiring people who are aligned with those values makes my job a lot easier.

However, we all make mistakes in hiring.  The people we hire are never perfect.  They all are sinful human beings and many of them are experts in hiding their true nature during the interview process.  But, their true selves will emerge with time.

That is when it is critical for a leader to put his money where his mouth is and have the courage to act for the good of the team.  One person who displays values that are counter to a team’s values can cause huge problems.

If an organization or a leader claims a handful of core values, then they must be sure they are willing to do everything necessary to uphold those values.  If they are not, then they are platitudes and not values.

It comes down to belief and courage.  As a leader do I truly believe in the values of my organization?  If I do, then do I have the courage to do what needs to be done to protect those values?

This is not easy.  But if I wanted an easy job, I should not have accepted the promotion to leadership.

Question:

What values do you believe are important enough to fire someone for violating?

 

Dave Anderson is author of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home.

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

Hire and Fire For Values – Part 1Hiring

Why does one person get hired over another?  Why does one person get fired over another?  Performance is a good reason.  Values are an even better reason.

A hypocrite is someone who says one thing but does another.  Therefore, an organization that claims values that they do not demonstrate is hypocritical and so is its leader.

One way to demonstrate the importance the leader places on the organizational values is to have the Courage to hire and fire people based on the leader’s proclaimed values.  Today, Part 1 focuses on Hiring For Values.

When hiring, I believe some leaders are either insane or just plain lazy.  Insanity and laziness are often the culprits in hiring people who who do not match an organization’s values.

Insanity

“Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”  Some leaders continue to interview people and look for the most technically competent people they can find.

Once they hire them, they are amazed how many highly competent people are difficult to work with or always turning things in late.  They shake their heads and wonder why another high potential hire has just lied to them.

Hiring for competence only – over and over again – and wondering why the results don’t get better – is pure insanity.

Laziness

I have been there.  At the end of a day of interviewing, I have been so brain dead that I am willing to hire the best person so far instead of waiting on the best person for the job.  Waiting to find someone who is qualified AND has values that align with my team’s values took time.

Determining a candidate’s talent and competence in an interview is relatively easy.  Most decent interviewers can do that.  The really good leaders dig beyond talent and competence.  They ask questions that do go beyond what is on the resume.

They know that most failures are not the result of a person’s competence.  They are the result of things like integrity, work ethic, teamwork and initiative.

Hire For Values

Are Your Values Valuable?  That is a blog I wrote years ago.  It’s a good question to ask yourself at work and in life.

When the rubber meets the road, is the leader willing to eliminate a qualified job candidate when she suspects the person may be a bad match for her company’s values?

An Example of Hiring For Values

There are many organizations that list Integrity, honesty or character as one of their core values.  How do you hire for values in one of these companies?

Interview Question:

Was it difficult to get off work today?

Answer:

No.  I just called in sick.

If I believe in the values of my company, I would not hire this person.  If they will fake an illness with their current company, do they fit into a culture where Integrity is claimed as a value?

Hiring For Values

Competence is easy to identify on a resume by asking a few questions.  HR departments everywhere teach leaders how to find talent.  But, we have already established that talent alone is not good enough.

If I want an organization full of people who have values that align with what we claim to be important, then we must dig into their values in the interview process.

What questions do you ask in interviews to see if the candidate aligns with your team’s values? 

Here are some questions I use to hire for values I mentioned above:  Character, Initiative, Courage, Perseverance and Humility.

Character:

What one experience in your life do you think shaped who you are the most?

Initiative:

Tell me about a problem you identified at work in the last 12 months.
Tell me about something that occurred at work that made your job more difficult than it should have been.

Courage:

Tell me about an obstacle you faced in your life.
Tell me about a time your boss or someone else did something morally questionable at work.

Perseverance:

Tell me about an idea someone had that did not work for you.
Tell me about a time when you failed to measure up to someone else’s standards.

Humility:

Tell me about the toughest person you ever worked for.
Tell me about a time when your boss criticized your work.

I am always careful not to ask “And what did you do about it.”  People who believe in the same values as my team does will always volunteer that they did something.

If they focus on the situation they faced and not their actions, they may be talented, but they are not a match for my team.  The answers I get will help me weed out the talented and aligned from merely the talented.

The Bottom Line:

Some leaders prefer to do the same thing they have always done in hiring and act surprised when they get the same results.  Others do not want to put in the effort it will take to hire someone who is both talented AND is a fit with the company’s values.

If my company truly believes it has values, then it must be willing to make hard decisions to reinforce those values.  Hiring and firing for values are often hard decisions.  But, as my dad, General Jim Anderson told me many times in my teens:

“If doing the right thing was easy, everyone would be doing it.”

If I decide to be different and display the Courage it takes for me to build and maintain a team that demonstrates the values we claim to believe in, then I have to be a leader who is willing to hire and fire based on values.

Hiring is the critical step.  The next step is Firing For Values.  That is the subject of my next blog:  Hiring and Firing for Values – Part 2.

Question:

What values are hardest to reinforce in an organization?

 

Dave Anderson is author of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home.

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

Integrity – Is Honesty Enough?

Honesty or Integrity? Are they the same thing? Is one more important than the other? Many people use the terms interchangeably confusing one with the other.

You can be an honest person and have questionable Integrity. Honesty is a part of Integrity, but they are not the same thing.

Many people believe that if they are honest, that also means they have Integrity, but that is not necessarily the case.

Examine these scenarios and see if an honest person is acting with Integrity.

Watching someone else cheat on a test, in a game, or on a work project and not participating but saying nothing.
Hearing another person tell a lie to a customer and doing and saying nothing.
Turning someone in for a compliance violation in order to gain a financial award.

Defining Honesty and Integrity

I prefer simple definitions that are 12 words or less and designed so a twelve year old can understand them.

Honesty:

Being truthful and/or not lying.

Integrity:

Doing what is good and right and proper, even at personal cost.

In each of these earlier scenarios you can say a person is honest. But are they acting with Integrity? There is more to Integrity than just NOT personally participating in a dishonest act.

While personal honesty is definitely a part of having Integrity, Integrity goes well beyond honesty. In fact, Integrity requires more of us than simply being honest.

Integrity’s root word is integer – which means whole or pure. There is a purity to Integrity that is absent if someone is being honest, but with selfish motives. The person of Integrity understands that the dishonest acts of others splatter.

You can not stay pure – maintain Integrity – and knowing allow someone else to lie, cheat or steal. You may be personally honest, but you have compromised your Integrity.

The Bottom Line:

Too often we fall into the trap of believing that being honest is enough. We believe that staying truthful and avoiding lies makes us a person of Integrity, when in fact we have settled for something less. Integrity goes beyond honesty. Integrity challenges us to do what is good and right and proper, even at personal cost.

That means a person of Integrity:

Speaks up when they observe someone cheat on a test, in a game, or on a work project.
Ensures a customer gets accurate information and stops the coworker from lying in the future.
Turns in someone at work for a compliance violation whether there is a financial reward or not.

Acting with Integrity in each of the scenarios takes Courage and is not easy. A person of Integrity knows that having Integrity will probably create uncomfortable situations and could cost them something. But they also believe that doing nothing and claiming that their own personal honesty is enough is a cop out.

Stopping at just being honest may only take us half way to Integrity. And half way to Integrity is not Integrity.

Question:

What is another example of being honest but lacking Integrity?

 

Dave Anderson is author of Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home.

You can find Becoming a Leader of Character on Amazon by clicking here:

 bit.ly/LOCBook.

You can also find Becoming a Leader of Character at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retailers.

 

The Cure for Our Culture’s Leadership Crisis

I don’t have to convince many people that leadership or the lack of good leadership is plaguing our culture.  Watch politics, read business journals, or see the breakdown of the family unit and it is obvious.

But what is the answer?  There is more to improving as a leader than reading a book or going to a seminar.  Today’s video outlines a plan for all of us, no matter where we are leading.  The cure is up to us – and that cure is CHARACTER!

 

The Bottom Line:

Our culture needs more Leaders of Character.  What we are doing to develop leaders in business, academia and in homes must change it’s focus.

To this point most of the focus has been on developing knowledge and competencies. The majority of the books, classes and seminars focus on management skills when the majority of our leadership woes can be related back to the root issue of CHARACTER.

As a Character Evangelist (Evangelist = Passionate Proclaimer) I am trying to change that focus.  This video is just one step in my mission to develop leaders who understand that their CHARACTER is THE #1 Leadership Tool they must develop.

As of today, July 26th 2016 Becoming a Leader of Charcter – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home is available at:

Amazon Kindle:  Download Here

Barnes and Noble Nook: Download Here

iBooks: Download Here

Download your copy and read Becoming a Leader of Character.  My father and I would be honored if you take the time to leave a review at any of these sites.

Do I Own The Wins AND The Losses?

“When an archer misses the bulls eye, he doesn’t blame the target.”

What is it about our human nature that causes us to seek excuses for when we fall short?  Even some of the best sales people and leaders I have been around, can identify something outside of their control that caused them to miss their goals.

Excuses are easy.  Breaking the habit of making excuses is hard.  I addressed the way West Point handles habitual excuses in an older blog:  West Point:  How Leaders Seize Responsibility.

But, what if we turned our thought process around?  What if we questioned who was responsible for the wins in our lives?

A Basketball Example

The irony of our reactions to wins and losses hit home to me one year during the high school basketball season.  I have boy/girl twins who both started on varsity for a few years.

When our team lost a basketball game, we often blamed the officiating.  These are part time officials who did their best. But, if we lost, bad officiating’s role was always a big part of the post game analysis.
 When we won, we talked about our teams toughness, experience and skill.  We never discussed that officiating could have contributed to the win.  I have no doubt the losing team would have a different story.

These were not the conversations of just some upset teenagers.  It would be easier to understand since they were the ones who actually practiced 2 hours a day, five days a week.  But, I heard these comments throughout the games from parents too.

Isn’t it equally likely that bad officiating hurt us in our losses AND helped us in our wins?

A Work Example

During a conversation with one of my salespeople, I discovered we had both fallen into a similar discussion about our circumstances.

We were discussing the difficult quarter we had just finished.  Our performance was underwhelming, and we were diagnosing the issues.

Headquarters’ quotas were too high this year.
A major customer had closed his doors thus driving our sales down.
A new competitor had entered the market.  Customers are always going to try something new.  Our product was launched 3 years ago.

The more we discussed our circumstances, the more frustrated I became.  We weren’t owning our results.  I hate that in others.  But, this time it was me!

Then I asked a tough question:

“If circumstances play such a big role in our losses, wouldn’t it make sense that they played a big role in our wins as well?”

There was an uncomfortable silence at first.  Then we both smiled and began to laugh.  The truth hurt. But, the irony of it was funny as well.

Applying The Question

When we apply that question to my sales situation, it shines a very different light on my wins and my losses.

If high quotas are to blame for my failure this year, could low quotas be to blame for my success in the past?
If a big customer moving out hurts my performance, how much did it help when they moved in?  Or others moved in?
If customers are always going to try something new, could that be the reason we did well the previous years?

I did not create the high quotas or the low quotas.  I did not ask customers to leave my territory or  to move into my territory.  I did not implant the desire for the new products over the old products into my customers.

The positive AND the negative circumstances were not in my control.  Yet, in each winning example, I was more than happy to accept the accolades and own those wins. I acted as if I was in control.

In each losing situation, I acted as if I had no control.  The circumstances were what controlled my results.  So do circumstances decide my winning or losing?  Partially.

The Bottom Line:

If I am going to own my wins, then I must also own my losses.  There will be circumstances that work against me and there will be circumstances that work for me.  That will never change.

I must begin with the mindset that no matter the circumstances, I will own my results.  This is the jumping off point for most problem solvers.  Problem finders focus on the circumstance.  Problem solvers focus on their reaction to the circumstance.

Problem finders are everywhere.  I want to be a problem solver.  I want to hire problem solvers as well.

Circumstances don’t determine a problem solver’s failures or their successes.  Circumstances only determine what a problem solver’s reaction will be.  It is our reaction to our circumstances that determine winning or losing.

Question:

When have you worked with someone who blamed the circumstances for his failures?

America’s Leadership Disease and The Treatment

There is a leadership crisis in our culture. Politics. Business. Sports. Families. Wherever you turn the results of this crisis are evident.

Some of the symptoms are political stalemate, lack of trust, dysfunctional teams, cheating in athletics or broken homes. There are a lot of approaches to fixing these symptoms. But the problem is we are treating a PNEUMONIA patient with cough medicine!

The Disease

Clarification: I am addressing the leadership in my home country. But reading the international news illustrates that what I am talking about is not uniquely American. The crisis in leadership – the disease we are all facing – crosses borders and time zones.

There are a lot of people who write books and speak about leadership and offer some quality treatment plans. But, treating the symptoms of the the leadership crisis and hoping the disease gets better is not working. The root cause of the disease that many well-meaning authors, consultants and academics are ignoring is:

CHARACTER.

Let’s face it. We do a pretty good job at evaluating and measuring someone’s competence. For politicians we can look at their record while holding office. For business leaders we can look at stock prices, quota attainment, or cost controls. For coaches or athletic departments we can look at wins and losses. For families we can see the size of a house or parental involvement in school activities.

But the disease of poor leadership continues. Look at some recent leadership failures in politics, business, sports and families:

Any political scandal of the last decade.
The classic cases of Enron or Bernie Madoff
College athletic recruiting issues or FIFA
Parental neglect due to careerism or disrespectful children

Those failures are rarely the result of someone not knowing HOW to do the job or knowing WHAT they should be doing. The failures can almost always be traced back to a character issue not a lack of competence.

We don’t need more savvy politicians. We need more Leaders of Character.
We don’t need more MBA’s in business. We need more Leaders of Character.
We don’t need more coaches who know the X’s and O’s. We need more Leaders of Character.
We don’t need more affluent parents. We need more Leaders of Character.

Until we begin to put the proper focus on character development in ourselves and the people we are responsible for developing, the leadership disease in America and the rest of the world will not get better.

Do you want a snapshot of your character? Take the Quick, Free and Private – My Mirror Character Assessment here:

www.MYCHARACTERTEST.com

The Treatment Plan

Many authors and consultants will mention the word character and tell you that you need to have it. But very few of these people actually tell you HOW YOU DEVELOP CHARACTER!

In a nutshell, you develop character by practicing character in the small things and the big things.

You have to do what you want to be!

Unless you begin doing the hard work that is required to build up your character, you will never develop those critical habits a Leader of Character must have.

This is not a quick fix. It is not a crash diet that will suddenly get your character in shape. Developing character takes work. It takes consistent effort. And you are never done!

It takes understanding that the little daily decisions we make impact our character. Each decision we make either put us closer to the person we are meant to be or further away from it.

Our book Becoming a Leader of Character – Six Habits that Make or Break a Leader at Work and at Home goes into detail about HOW to develop the Habits of Character that are causing so much of our leadership crisis.

Courage, Humility, Integrity, Selflessness, Duty, and Positivity.

Imagine if our political leaders, our business leaders, our coaches and athletic departments, and our fathers and mothers all developed these Habits of Character. Would there still be a leadership crisis?

The Bottom Line:

On July 26, 2016 the Amazon Kindle version of Becoming a Leader of Character will be available. If you want to read more about HOW someone develops their character and the character of the people they are responsible for, order your Kindle version here:

bit.ly/LOCKindle

If you wish to pre-order a traditional book from Amazon (shipping in the fall) order that version here:

bit.ly/LOCBook

Becoming a Leader of Character will also be available at Barnes and Noble, Books-a-Million and other retail outlets.

I consider myself a Character Evangelist! I am passionate about treating America’s leadership disease with more than just cough syrup. We must treat the root cause in order to beat this disease! We (that means you and me) must do a better job of developing our character and the character of the upcoming generations.

That has been my father’s cause for most of his 83 years on Earth. He has passed that passion on to me. I am a Character Evangelist and will not stop writing, speaking and praying about the need for Leaders of Character in America.

Question:

Will you join me?

The First Step To Building My Character

I am not going to candy coat this blog with euphemisms. Let’s just be honest with ourselves and call a spade a spade. A liar tells lies. A coward is too scared to do what is right. An egomaniac puts himself first.

When we use a euphemism to describe our behaviors, it is usually a tool to make us feel better about ourselves. I am not going to do that here. I will leave that to the politicians who say they “misremembered”.

My character is a work in progress. We all have work to do. But, what should I be working on and where should I start?

What Does Character Look Like?

Integrity, Courage, and Selflessness.   These are great traits to pursue when I want to be a person of high character.

Some people may add other traits to the list. That’s fine with me. Even though we focus on six traits in our book Becoming a Leader of Character, I am going to focus briefly on our pursuit of Integrity, Courage and Selflessness.

So how are we doing with this pursuit? Do we talk a good game but justify our true behaviors with excuses and euphemisms?

The First Step Is Admitting I Have A Problem

I am a recovering liar, coward and egomaniac. I am not going to discuss an entire 12 Step Program. I am only going to focus on the first step of most 12 Step Programs.

First I will let Miriam Webster define the problem:

Webster defines lying as – marked by or containing falsehoods.
Webster defines cowardice as – a lack of courage.
Webster defines self-centeredness as – being concerned with only your own needs and interests.

Again, let’s eliminate the euphemisms. Read the list below.  If I have used these words or done these things, I need to admit that I have a problem:

I am lying if I:

Tell White Lies: “I have a meeting then.”
Use Half-truths: “I told her most of the story.”
Tell a Fib: “I have to leave early to get the kids.”
Tend to Exaggerate: “I played a big role in our success.”

If my behavior is marked by or contains falsehoods I am lying and I am a liar!

I am displaying cowardice if I:

Avoid confronting a co-worker about her inappropriate behavior.
Stay silent because I am afraid of my boss’s response.
Allow a subordinate to intimidate others on my team.
Don’t admit my own failures and ask for forgiveness.

If my behaviors display a lack of courage, it is cowardice and I am a coward!

I am being self-centered if I:

Choose not to help someone because it is inconvenient to me at the moment.
Am concerned whether I will receive the credit I believe I am due.
Focus on my career advancement over what’s good for the team.
Speak over the top of others, cut them off, and/or dominate conversations.

If my behaviors display that I am only concerned with my own needs and interests, it is self-centeredness and I am an egomaniac!

www.MYCHARACTERTEST.com

Take the test! It’s FREE and PRIVATE!

How Do You Answer These Questions?

1.  If it is not the truth, then it must be a __________.

Answer: LIE

2.  If it is not courage, then it must be _____________.

Answer: COWARDICE

3.  If it is not selflessness, then it must be __________.

Answer: SELF-CENTEREDNESS

The Bottom Line:

Perfection is not attainable, but improvement is. However, I cannot begin to improve and grow until I admit that I have a problem.

The euphemisms and excuses we use to justify our behaviors prevent us from making the changes necessary to change our character for the better.

I believe our character is built upon our habits – our good habits and our bad habits. Most addicts will not stop their destructive behaviors until they come to the point where they admit to having a problem.

Once I admit I have a problem, it makes it easier to make the choice to change my behaviors. Every habit is formed one choice at a time. Each time I choose to start or stop doing something, it makes it easier to make that choice the next time.

Soon a new habit is formed. The question is, is it a positive habit or a negative one?

But, first I need to admit I have a problem.

Hi. My name is Dave Anderson.

I am a recovering liar, coward, and egomaniac.

Question:

If someone is not telling the truth, acting with courage or acting selflessly, what would you call it?

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