Robb Todd's Blog, page 3
August 7, 2012
July 12, 2012
SOMEONE ON THE SUBWAY IS TAKING A PICTURE OF YOU FOR A BLOG
Just...
SOMEONE ON THE SUBWAY IS TAKING A PICTURE OF YOU FOR A BLOG
Just say what is in your mouth. It does not have to be so hard to breathe. Other people, though. Everybody takes something. Forgive them. Forgiveness is what they want even if they do not know it. You know what? Forgive me but do not say what is in your mouth if your mouth is filled with hard candy and you suck it at the end of each sentence because then you should really shut the shut up. There is a fish with goggly eyes in a bowl with purple rocks and that fish will not shut up. He speaks in popping bubbles. It is difficult to have a conversation but I think he is explaining financial derivatives and how they affect the hard-candy market pop pop pop.
SOMEONE ON THE SUBWAY IS TAKING A PICTURE OF YOU FOR A BLOG
Just...
SOMEONE ON THE SUBWAY IS TAKING A PICTURE OF YOU FOR A BLOG
Just say what is in your mouth. It does not have to be so hard to breathe. Other people, though. Everybody takes something. Forgive them. Forgiveness is what they want even if they do not know it. You know what? Forgive me but do not say what is in your mouth if your mouth is filled with hard candy and you suck it at the end of each sentence because then you should really shut the shut up. There is a fish with goggly eyes in a bowl wi...
June 27, 2012
IT IS BETTER TO BE AN IMPERFECTIONISTThe sidewalks are dotted...
IT IS BETTER TO BE AN IMPERFECTIONIST
The sidewalks are dotted with gum and a man pushes a wobbly cart built with an old wheel chair, selling shaved ice. A sweaty citizen unplugs a hydrant and the corner floods. A pit bull attacks the gusher. It bites and bites but cannot take hold of the water with its teeth. The dog’s owner finally drags it away. The hunger is always greater than the need.
“Isn’t the sun awesome?”
“Yeah. I’ve always been a fan.”
A man claps a domino onto a card table near the gushing water and dudes press iron on a bench next to that. A car door opens, releasing horns and drums onto everything. A woman dances. One of the men wears a T-shirt with a picture of himself wearing the T-shirt with a picture of himself wearing the T-shirt with a picture of himself wearing the T-shirt with a picture of himself wearing the T-shirt with a picture of himself wearing and that could go on forever.
“Just because I don’t remember why, doesn’t mean there’s not a reason.”
Rooftops are silver now, not black. There is nothing to do when the embers hit your skin other than enjoy them. Balls of light as people beat the primate. Face colors. Ego-friendly. A bee lands on the ledge and it wants its photo taken.
Are you where you are or somewhere else?
IT IS BETTER TO BE AN IMPERFECTIONISTThe sidewalks are dotted...
IT IS BETTER TO BE AN IMPERFECTIONIST
The sidewalks are dotted with gum and a man pushes a wobbly cart built with an old wheel chair, selling shaved ice. A sweaty citizen unplugs a hydrant and the corner floods. A pit bull attacks the gusher. It bites and bites but cannot take hold of the water with its teeth. The dog’s owner finally drags it away. The hunger is always greater than the need.
“Isn’t the sun awesome?”
“Yeah. I’ve always been a fan.”
A man claps a domino onto a card table near the...
June 22, 2012
I FINALLY FOUND HIM …
… and got revenge.
I FINALLY FOUND HIM …
… and got revenge.
May 30, 2012
MILLIONAIRE CABBIE
There is a pizza slice in Philly so big it...
MILLIONAIRE CABBIE
There is a pizza slice in Philly so big it will eat you if you do not eat it first. There is a growler in Hudson, NY, that is so beautiful that when it is empty it is art. There is a cabbie on the prowl in Miami who is a millionaire. He says he gives all his cab earnings to children in Africa. I asked him why he does not just give the children some of his millions. I saw a bongo player in the New York City subway whose arms ended at his elbows. I also saw a limo without tint on the street. I also saw a woman staring into the camera on her phone adjusting her hat on the sidewalk. I met a man who tiny twin dogs in a bag. One was named a dog name and the other was named after the man. It had the man’s name. The man named the dog after himself. Don’t you get it? How can you not get it? Like this: I saw rainbow toes in leopard-print sandals. She wants things to mean more than they do like how I cut my finger on an eggshell and it did not bleed. It never bled.
MILLIONAIRE CABBIE
There is a pizza slice in Philly so big it...
MILLIONAIRE CABBIE
There is a pizza slice in Philly so big it will eat you if you do not eat it first. There is a growler in Hudson, NY, that is so beautiful that when it is empty it is art. There is a cabbie on the prowl in Miami who is a millionaire. He says he gives all his cab earnings to children in Africa. I asked him why he does not just give the children some of his millions. I saw a bongo player in the New York City subway whose arms ended at his elbows. I also saw a limo without tint on the street. I also saw a woman staring into the camera on her phone adjusting her hat on the sidewalk. I met a man who held tiny twin dogs in a bag. One was named a dog name and the other was named after the man. It had the man’s name. The man named the dog after himself. Don’t you get it? How can you not get it? Like this: I saw rainbow toes in leopard-print sandals. She wants things to mean more than they do like how I cut my finger on an eggshell and it did not bleed. It never bled.
May 8, 2012
Banana-macadamia pancakes with an egg on top for dinner because...
Banana-macadamia pancakes with an egg on top for dinner because when you are grown you can do that. After you mop the last of the yolk with the last rag of pancake, stand in front of the fridge and chug orange juice right from the bottle. How many Hs do you put after the “Ah!”?
April 17, 2012
WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO IN THIS SITUATION?
All advice...
WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO IN THIS SITUATION?
All advice fails except this: Never trust anything that is orange that has eyes.
You might also try bacon as a bookmark. Be proud of your double standards because it is really hard to exist, especially in the City of Ids.
A man on the sidewalk said to an upset boy: “You know exactly what you’re doing. You’re making bad choices. Hey! One more of those and that’ll be another five minutes.” He took the boy’s hand and a sports utility vehicle ran over an empty plastic bottle. The bottle exploded. The cap shot off and hit a woman in the head and the boy sang, “Plip plop goes the poop!”
We ruin everything we like by just trying to get there.
