Michael J. Roueche's Blog, page 16

"Beyond the Wood" Now in Print

"Beyond the Wood" is now in print for those of you who have been asking for it. Thanks to Vesta House for all the work they did to bring it about. You can get it at Amazon where it's eligible for Amazon Prime free, two-day shipping.

Watching for Snowy Owls

I just saw an article about record number of Snowy Owls visiting the lower 48 this year and it reminded me about our best family owl stories. We periodically see owls in our area; in fact, I saw one a couple hundred feet from our house just last week. By the way, I think they look at a distance like a cat sitting in a tree, and with that aside here are my favorite owl stories:

My mother and father-in-law were visiting a couple of years ago, and she was sitting on our back deck in the middle of the day reading the final installment of Harry Potter, owls and all (were there owls in book 7? I don't remember). The deck in the summer is somewhat hidden by the trees that shade it, and as she read about Harry, she heard a noise and falling clatter and looked up startled to see an owl had just landed on the deck at her feet. The owl, also startled, apparently had not dropped in to listen to a Hedwig reading and immediately took off for more private locals. Funny coincidence.

A month or so ago, we got a copy of the final movie installment of Harry Potter. I think we picked it up in the morning, planning to watch it that night. But, right on cue, as the afternoon light waned, we looked into the back yard just in time to see what looked like a big cat sitting in our backyard pine tree.  Do owls know when you're reading or watching Harry Potter? In our five years in Colorado, we have seen an owl on our "property" only twice that we know of: both times we were reading about or about to watch Harry Potter.

So, where does this all lead? I would really like to see a snowy owl up close (two feet tall is a big bird), so I'm thinking of going out and buying a big poster of Hedwig. It just might work.

Beyond the Wood now on Nook

We've been asked when is "Beyond the Wood" coming to the Nook. The good news is it's up, and you can now get a Nook version.

We're also working to get a printed version. It's done, but it's not yet linked to the Kindle version on Amazon. We'll let you know when they're linked up.

Lessons for Living (from those who have done some)

In October, columnist David Brooks asked readers for a "gift": "If you are over 70. . ., I'd like you to write a brief report on your life so far, an evaluation of what you did well, of what you did not so well and what you learned along the way."

In response, he heard from thousands of readers, and in a later column tried to distill some "life lessons" he took from the gifts. The lessons follow. I've given them the numbers and any comments I make on specific lessons are italicized and in parentheses:

1) Divide your life into chapters. "The happier ones divided time into (somewhat artificial) phases. They wrote things like: There were six crucial decisions in my life. Then they organized their lives around those pivot points." Then later on he leaps to "They had more control over their fate." (He starts off with the weakest lesson.)

2) Beware rumination. (Methinks of a public radio piece I heard years ago, it went on for quite a while, something to the effect of : "I think too much. I think I think too much. I think I think I think too much. I think I think I think I think too much." Etc.) One of his points is that "Many of the most impressive people, on the other hand, were strategic self-deceivers. When something bad was done to them, they forgot it, forgave it or were grateful for it."

3) You can't control other people.

4) Lean toward risk. "It's trite, but apparently true. Many more seniors regret the risks they didn't take than regret the ones they did."

5) Measure people by their growth rate, not by their talents. (Interesting.)

6) Be aware of the generational bias. (Apparently, respondents liked their kids more than their parents.)

7) Work within institutions or crafts, not outside them. (No room for rebellion.)

8 ) People get better at the art of living. (As they get older.)

I think it important to remember a couple of things about these lessons: 1) The audience that would have responded to the Brooks' request are self-selected, and other groups with different reading patterns (or no reading patterns at all) might have other lessons to share. 2) The respondents (I'm assuming) aren't yet at the actual end of life, so there may still be important lessons they won't learn or recognize till later. An interesting list, nonetheless.

What are your life lessons?

The Key to Happiness

My last two posts have been about humility and love. When I saw a great column this morning on gratitude (obviously related to the week's celebration), I wanted to add that attribute to the list. The column by John Tierney in the New York Times entitled "A Serving of Gratitude May Save the Day" claims: "Cultivating an 'attitude of gratitude' has been linked to better health, sounder sleep, less anxiety and depression, higher long-term satisfaction with life and kinder behavior toward others, including romantic partners." He then focuses on study-verified ways to cultivate gratitude. If you've got the time, it's well worth reading the whole column.

From my observations, I am convinced that gratitude is key to happiness in our lives, especially as we direct that gratitude toward God. When we are grateful for what we have received from the Lord, we are freed to find happiness in it. We can let go of the sometimes incessant craving to have more money, a bigger home, more personal accolades, looks, fame and prestige. We can rejoice in what God has given us and be content with his wisdom, guidance and mercies in our lives.

And if it's a tough time, and you're finding it hard to be grateful for anything, Tierney gives us a way to deal with that as well: "Hey," he writes, "it could always be worse… Instead of focusing on the dry, tasteless turkey on your plate, be grateful the six-hour roasting process killed any toxic bacteria."

Happy Thanksgiving.

Love and Two Definitions

Last week I wrote about humility, but I was thinking about love as I wrote as well as they seem closely related. I have a couple of favorite definitions of love.

The first one comes from "The Road Less Traveled" by M. Scott Peck:

"I define love thus: The will to extend one's self for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth."

Note he is not defining an emotion or how we feel, but suggesting a decision to act on behalf of others and for our self. I don't suppose his inclusion of self is a self-centered search for self or self-aggrandizement but a recognition that we must choose to do things that help ourselves grow spiritually as well as focus on helping others grow.

The second definition that appeals to me was written earlier, and I wonder if it didn't influence Dr. Peck's definition. But regardless, it has influenced my thoughts recently. CS Lewis suggested in "Mere Christianity":

"… Love, in the Christian sense, does not mean an emotion. It is a state not of the feelings, but of the will …."

That sounds a lot like Dr. Peck, but here's the part that brings new understanding to me,

"We 'like' or are 'fond of' some people, and not of others. It is important to understand that this natural 'liking' is neither a sin or virtue, any more than your likes or dislikes in food are a sin or a virtue. It is just a fact. But, of course, what we do about it is either sinful or virtuous."

Again, love is a choice to act for the welfare of others, without reference to how we feel about them. Mother, father, son, daughter, friend, neighbor, enemy: If love is a choice and action, we can love each of them, whether they are among our favorites or, if given our druthers, we'd avoid them altogether. Our challenge then is to learn to control our feelings about those we don't like and about those we do like until we are able to step outside of those natural inclinations and are able to love (the choice and action) equally all those around us.

"I love you," takes on a whole new meaning if you think of it as an action, not an emotion.

A Humble Meritocracy

I've been thinking about humility lately, and I'm writing this specifically today because I just read Our Reckless Meritocracy by Ross Douthat, New York Times, and it prompted me to write. He wrote interestingly about America's version of meritocracy and its many failures based on the pride (and thus blindness) of intelligence.

Many have touted humility as a virtue, but there have always been those who thought it unimportant or who have even identified it as a weakness—a weakness to be exploited. But I've been thinking about it lately in the context of it not only being a virtue but a divine trait, and I'm not writing about it as a divine trait solely in the sense that it is something God wants us to develop or that he gives to us through his grace—both of which I'm sure he does. Rather, I'm thinking about it as a divine trait—a necessary part of the unchanging essence of the nature of God. You see it in Jesus Christ, as he humbles himself by choice to come to earth to save mankind. You see it in his life, as he ignores the pleasures and glory of the world to focus on salvific sacrifice. And this week for the first time, I began to think of the humility of God as extending beyond the end of the world and into Heaven.

But to justify that thought, I need to step back and define what I'm thinking about as humility. One of my favorite statements about pride is, "The central feature of pride is enmity—enmity toward God and enmity toward our fellowmen." The quote captures the self-centeredness, the self-elevation, the arrogance and thus the blindness engendered by pride. Humility is a two-part opposite to that: It starts with a reality-based understanding of self and how we fit in and relate to one another and to everything around us (including and perhaps especially to God); then necessarily follows our love-based responsibilities to reach out to all. What better description of an attribute of God? From his life on earth to his unchanging and divine nature beyond this life. The divine trait of humility then: Understanding self and all around you and giving self . . . endlessly. I personally haven't quite measured up, yet, and I'm pretty sure the country hasn't either. But think of it! Living in an America led by a humble meritocracy. Not a bad vision for some day in the future.

Printed Version of "Beyond the Wood" Coming this Month

We're working this week with the cover artist and designer for the print version of "Beyond the Wood." Vesta Publishing House has been working on it for a while now, and we're hoping it will be out within the month. (Thanks to Vesta for all they're doing.)

In addition to being a fun read, as we approach Thanksgiving, we hope it engenders renewed gratitude for courageous women and men who gave up or lost their comforts and security in the great national struggle for freedom and eventually unity. Those who fought on both sides helped define the greatness of America. Past history, and especially the Civil War, has shaped our present in ways that impact virtually everything we do (and maybe everything we think) in our lives. "Beyond the Wood" is an exciting read whether you read it as an introduction to the Civil War or as a Civil War buff, whether you're in the mood for romance, or you just want a wholesome, entertaining, message-filled book.

Also, special thanks to those who have read it and to those who posted reviews at Amazon.com. Every bit of help is appreciated.

Leaping Forward under Steve Jobs' Leadership

I heard last night of Steve Jobs' passing and have read several tributes to him since then. I sorrow for the pain his family must be feeling and extend heart-felt condolences to them.

My awareness of Jobs over the years was always peripheral: I knew he co-founded Apple in a garage. I'm sure I must have known about the Apple II computer, and remember the buzz of the coming McIntosh. I loved the 1984 Superbowl ad. I remember seeing the Mac for the first time, the mouse, and it's simple-to-use, visual file-cabinet-like, file retrieval system. I must have still been using Microsoft's painfully awkward and difficult DOS at the time. I remember when Jobs hired a new CEO, luring him away from Pepsi. I remember when that CEO fired Jobs, and I remember watching Apple slowly fading. I remember disappointment that Microsoft had won and anticipated it being the only viable option for everyone but students and the creatives of the world. I knew about his return to Apple and the stream of incredibly useful, fun and society-changing products that followed: the iPod and iTunes, the iPhone, the iPad.

But here's my confession: I've never owned an Apple product, and honestly may never. And that doesn't bother me in the least. However, it would be silly to pretend he didn't impact my life. The influence of his Apple products changed current and future computer, communication, entertainment products and businesses, and his innovation (and that of those who worked hard alongside) changed the lives of those around me. Therefore, in the end, Steve Jobs and his fellows changed my life, and I can honestly say for the better. Thank you.

I appreciate his mammoth contribution. But I can't help but reflect that while technological advancement makes life easier (and, importantly, for those parts of the world where people live at the margin, it is being used to make fundamental advancement in quality of life), technology is not about making us experience a profound, lasting joy for and in life. It remains merely a tool. And, unfortunately, obsession with such tools can deter us from the very true happiness that we all, admit it or not, crave.

With all the amazing advances in science and technology; with all the dedicated and influential pioneers, discoverers, inventors, and innovators in science and technology (in all fields for that matter); we are still left exactly where we have always been: To find true happiness, we in the end must turn to the creator of all good things.

Who Knew Moose were Heavenly

I recently pulled out my copy of some of CS Lewis writings: As I quickly glanced through a few of the highlights I'd made in an earlier reading, one challenged me: "Aim at Heaven and you will get earth 'thrown in': aim at earth and you will get neither. " I was left wondering if I was aiming at Heaven or whether I had settled a little too comfortably into earth life.

Cow Moose and Calf Block Trail

The question reoccurred to me later in the week when we went on an easy family hike at Brighton Ski Resort, searching for four lakes: Mary, Martha, Catherine and Dog lakes. We started early, and there were no other hikers around. At the very beginning of trail, our way was blocked by a cow moose and her calf. They were leisurely munching away at grass just off the trail. They paid us little heed, and after watching them for a while, we slowly approached them to encourage them to move on.

Bull Moose above Brighton Ski Resort

By the time we came back down the trail several hours later, there were many hikers and one bull moose. He did not seem overly bothered by the now-hiking-hordes, but moved slowly, heavily, always staying in the shade. (See shaky point and shoot video of moose at Brighton Ski Resort.)

The hike was beautiful, the weather perfect, the company great, seeing the moose was fun, but still lingering was the question: "Was I aiming for Heaven or becoming a comfortable fixture on earth?" Part of the answer came back as a paradox: Taking time to focus on the basic elements of earth life is important in keeping focus on Heaven. When we get into nature, we are close to God's creation—the process and the result–and we are once again recreated. That's why it's called "recreation."