Mike Lester's Blog, page 5

Saturday Sinema #40 - Suspiria

Suzy wants to study ballet. She also wants to see the world. What better place to kill two birds with one stone than a celebrated dance academy in Germany? Trouble is there's been a horrible double murder involving one of the students, and the other students seem to be keeping some heavy duty secrets. After a while it's obvious that there's some witchy shit going down at the old academy. I mean, when you get that much estrogen in one place there has to be a coven involved somehow, right? This is probably Dario Argento's finest hour, the pinnacle of his filmography. If you haven't seen Suspiria by now, where the fuck ya been? Lots of good shit in this one folks; we got dog mayhem, an angry blind pianist, a creepy Little Lord Fauntleroy, a couple of homicidal babushkas, lederhosen, and Udo Kier. Couple all that with a kick ass score by Goblin and you got a cinematic blow job for the senses. Enjoy!

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sB4u6...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onTYK...

Goblin, kickin out the jams: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUv8U...

I want to rub this all over my body: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JV76N...

Impress your friends:






Live in the now, go to www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #39 - Viy

If you've been trucking along with me these last few months you more than likely remember me mentioning how much I love Russian fantasy films. I've mentioned Viy several times, and after you see it you'll know why. The story is pretty basic. A seminary student on leave kicks back in Abe Vigoda's barn for the night. Some funky piggyback action goes down. Later, the seminarian gets suckered into standing vigil over the corpse of a young girl thought to be a witch. It seems she comes back to life at night and does some strange shit, like summoning demonic familiars and riding around on her flying coffin. If you ask me, this chick is no different than any other broad out there. But hey, at least she's a good looking dead witch, right? And that's really the gist of the game here kids; this is basically a fairytale for adults. There are so many wonderful facets to this film - I mean, how many amazing mustaches can one movie feature? You're about to find out. There's even some fucking mime in this thing. So get your Ketel One out of the freezer, pour yourself some good times, sit back and let your mind be blown. This is some good shit right here folks.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaVWe...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyg0W...

A short bit of goodness: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeKpM...

Be better than other people - read this:






Rise above and go to www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #38 - A Virgin Among The Living Dead

So it seems one of Christina's wealthy relatives has kicked the bucket and there's going to be a reading of the will at the old dude's pad. She heads out, and upon arriving meets the rest of the family for the first time. There's a catatonic, a predatory scissor-wielding bush-pirate cousin, piano virtuoso uncle Howard Vernon, and even chicken head aficionado Jess Franco himself as the mute Igor-type peripheral lurker. But what is the secret they're hiding from Christina? Why is there a strange aura of doom around the mansion? This one was shot in 1973, in the wake of Soledad Miranda's death, a period of rather intense creative soul searching for Franco. Known under a thousand different titles, this is the original cut of the movie, before others tampered with it over the years adding bad zombie footage and flaccid 70s softcore...blech!! Ditch your shoes, turn off the phone, make a pitcher of margaritas and watch this. Franco at his best. Plus, there's a lot of boobs in this, so that's good.

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOUW7...

Franco's pick-up method needs a lot of work: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0J4o...

Check this out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chp1N...

Broaden your damned horizons:








If you feel you are ready, go to www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #37 - The Double

I'm not giving anything away when I tell you that Jean Sorel gets shot in a parking garage by some Rabbi Eric Clapton-looking dude during the opening minutes of this week's flick. It's one of those movies where they show you the ending first and the audience then has to follow along to see how we got to this point. Usually films like this are a slog to get through, but not this one; it's smooth sailing. Sorel's movies are usually pretty groovy. Plus it's got Ewa Aulin and J&B all over the fucking place. So basically, Sorel gets shot, then there's a lot of drinking and smoking and innuendo, and then we're back to Sorel and Clapton in the garage. Don't really know what the fuck happened in this one, but it was a fun ride, nevertheless. Enjoy!

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzNeE...

And now a word from our sponsor: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vvskc...

Think about it:







Good things happen at www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #36 - Crash

Different strokes for different folks, so the saying goes. Well, the folks in this week's flick are sure stroking some strange shit. These people give new meaning to the term "auto-eroticism." David Cronenberg's films are mostly concerned with some type of mental or psychic abnormality manifesting itself physically on the body, usually as some pulsing, sentient tumor type thing, and Crash is no exception. No tumors this time, but there are plenty of scars on display. James Spader and Debra Unger are a couple who get their rocks off in various ways, but it's not until they get caught up with a group of car crash fetishists that they find true domestic bliss. In a manner of speaking. Cold and kinky, this is the perfect date night movie - it's a real ice breaker...

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNi80...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axp2R...

Some visual aids, buckle up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XM9JK...

Read on:






Go to www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #35 - The Beyond

In the early years of the 1980s, Lucio Fulci made a successful string of horror films that solidified his cult auteur status stateside while simultaneously blowing the minds of gorehounds the world over. Zombie, City of the Living Dead, House by the Cemetery, and this week's pick, The Beyond, stormed into grindhouse cinemas in rapid succession over the course of two or three years, their one sheets warning that due to excessive violence no one under 18 will be admitted. Fuck. Yeah. If you aren't familiar with The Beyond yet, here's the skinny: Liza buys a fixer-upper in New Orleans with plans to turn the place into an inn. But some dark deeds in the place's past put the kabosh on her plans pronto. Dead people come a-callin', marauding tarantulas extricate tongues, a blind girl and her dog Dicky chill on the interstate, and a creepy ginger chick goes wigsville in the morgue. Oh yeah, there's also some business about the hotel sitting over one of the seven gateways to hell or something. This may be Fulci's masterpiece. If you only see one Fulci film in your lifetime, do yourself a favor and check this one out. They don't make 'em like this anymore.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ef0oH...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KijEM...

Look at this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkT7...

Mas mucho sanguineous munchies:






Shoot the works at www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #34 - Opera

So, apparently opera singers are supposed to be really horny. At least according to the old wives tale. But you wouldn't know it by looking at Betty, the protagonist of this week's sick little flick. Seems her mother was into some pretty kinky sadistic sex, so now Betty's mentally scarred and totally frigid. Things seem to be going okay for her though; she lands a gig as Lady Macbeth, her boyfriend is super rich, and...um...there's a psycho stalking her who every now and then tapes needles to her eyes and forces her to watch while he does some heinous shit. This is the last great movie Dario Argento made before the wheels started coming off his go-kart. There have been a few glimmers of brilliance here and there with The Stendhal Syndrome, The Card Player, and Do You Like Hitchcock?, but with Opera we're watching the last rays of a dying sun. Dario, I love ya man. I know you've got another great film in you... Come back home, buddy.

Trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yN2kZ...

Full Movie:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLdfi...

Bonus crap!:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9KNa...

You know this would look awesome in your living room:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEVCj...

Read this:







Get down with your bad self at www.saturdaysinema.com

Saturday Sinema #33 - Bloody Pit of Horror (Il Boia Scarlatto)

House guests. Sometimes the fuckers just won't leave. That's the problem for our antihero in this week's flick. He told them more than once he doesn't really dig company, but the bastards just wouldn't listen. So, he does the only sensible thing a disgruntled host can do; he dons his red tights, a big-ass gold medallion, and cavorts around his castle randomly torturing his pesky guests. Fucking-A right on, man. Bloody Pit of Horror falls into a much beloved sub-genre of the Euro horror film, that of the busload of models/schoolgirls/tourists stranded in the creepy castle. Several films have used this plot, Playgirls and the Vampire and The Devil Walks at Midnight are two such gems, but nobody says "Howdy neighbor!" like Mickey Hargitay in tights. I'm sensing skepticism from some of you out there. The blackboard of your movie-going experience is muddled with mainstream. Erase.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRO7p...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rofjq...

See, I'm not the only one who digs this shit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-hIf...

Reading is fundamental:






Go to www.saturdaysinema.com. No, really, go.

Saturday Sinema #32 - The Spider Labyrinth

Don't know what it is about those eight-legged buggers; they creep the shit out of me. Actually, I do know what it is, and if we ever meet I'll tell you the story after a few drinks. Deal? The protagonist of this week's flick has similar issues with spiders. Seems his kid brother was a sadistic little bastard and locked him in a closet with the biggest damned arachnid on the planet. So, later in life when he has to travel to Budapest on assignment, it's only natural he should become entangled with a strange spider worshiping cult, right? Anyway, I highly suggest you settle down and enjoy this unjustly underrated little piece of sick, beautiful crap. Fans of John Carpenter's version of The Thing will particularly enjoy the denouement. God bless Sergio Stivaletti... Part giallo, part straight-up horror film, The Spider Labyrinth will fuck you up! Enjoy!

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0Coq...

Full Movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2S0-J...

Sink your fangs into this shit:






To completely lose your fucking mind, go to www.saturdaysinema.com

Ways To Strength and Beauty

My new story "Ways To Strength and Beauty" will be appearing in the forthcoming anthology Wrapped in Black: Thirteen Tales of Witches and the Occult, from Sekhmet Press, edited by Jennifer L. Greene. Tentative release date October 23, 2014...
http://sekhmetpress.wordpress.com/201...