Mandi Ehman's Blog, page 9

What is a classical Christian education?

Each summer we attend a Classical Conversations practicum, where my vision for our homeschool is strengthened, our kids get to do a fun academic camp, and I participate in training for my role as an Essentials tutor. This year we’re participating in a practicum close to my mom’s, and I’ve updated this post from a couple of years ago to share what I’ve learned as we head into our 7th year with Classical Conversations!

To start, let’s talk about what classical Christian education looks like, and then I’ll share why it’s part of our very eclectic approach to education.

Classical Education and the Trivium

First, let’s define classical and classical education. When I use this term, I’m referring to a model that focuses on the trivium—a Latin word meaning the three roads—where all learning is broken down into three distinct but overlapping stages that correspond with the natural development of children:

The Grammar stage, during which children enjoy memorizing and soaking up large amounts of information even if they’re not sure what to do with that information. The example that’s often used is this: “You can teach them eenie, meenie, miny, mo or amo, amas, amat. Both are fun to them and they don’t care which rhyme you teach them.” I’m not in any way implying that we shouldn’t teach our kids classic nursery rhymes and games, but their brains are amazingly supple, and we’ve found that our kids can learn eenie, meenie, miny, mo and amo, amas, amat (an example of Latin verb conjugation) without any trouble.If that information continues to be drilled during the elementary school years rather than just introduced once during a unit study and then forgotten, they will then be able to recall it without any trouble once they get to the next stage, which is…


The Dialectic stage, where adolescents begin to think more analytically and ask “Why?” and “How?” rather than just believing the information that’s laid before them. Instead of fighting this natural stage, the classical model embraces their need to push back against information and encourages them to really dig deeper into understanding why and to use the information they’ve memorized in the earlier years to begin discovering more about the world on their own.The idea is that because they have all of the information (commonly referred to in classical education circles as “pegs”) memorized, they’re more easily able to manipulate and question it.


And finally, the Rhetoric stage is the point where students can begin really applying what they’ve learned to form their own thoughts and opinions, to teach others and to actually put it into practice.

While the stages roughly conform to the elementary (grammar), middle school (dialectic) and high school (rhetoric) levels in the education model, we all actually progress through these three stages naturally whenever we want to master a new subject.

For example, if you’re learning to cook, you must first define the kitchen tools, terms and measurements used in recipes. Then, you begin to gain an understanding for why recipes are written in certain orders — why we mix the dry ingredients separately from the wet ingredients when making muffins, for example. And finally, you’re able to create your own recipes and teach others to cook.

The “Lost Tools of Learning” essay from Dorothy Sayers is commonly referenced by classical educators, and she refers to these stages as the poll parrot (grammar), pert (dialectic) and poetic (rhetoric) stages.

And in the Bible, we see the three strains of knowledge (grammar), understanding (dialectic) and wisdom (rhetoric) referenced together, for example in Proverbs 24:3-4 and Colossians 1:9.

This model is often represented by the image of a tree seen above. The roots represent the grammar stage, when children soak up a broad base of facts and establish a foundation; the trunk represents the dialectic stage, when children are growing stronger in their understanding of those facts; and the leaves/fruit represents the rhetoric stage, when they really bloom and produce their own ideas.

You’ll also see the sun in the corner above, providing that crucial light that is needed to help the tree grow, and that is the thing that sets the traditional classical model apart from the classical Christian model, where the Truth found in God’s Word and our faith provides that much needed nourishment.

Classical Education and the Integration of Subjects

The other important difference between the classical model and modern education is that subjects are taught as interrelated rather than as separate entities.

While specialization seems to be a buzzword in education and industry right now, I want my kids to see the connections between the subjects as we learn. How do the natural resources in a country affect their politics? What scientific discoveries were being made during the Romantic period of the arts? While this is harder for some subjects than others (like math, for example), I think it’s important to teach these subjects as interrelated rather than as separate entities because they are interrelated and teaching them in isolation gives us a limited view of the world around us.

Why Classical Education?

Understanding the model itself is great, but it still doesn’t exactly answer the question of why we’ve chosen this model for our children’s education. Although this list is not exhaustive, here are the reasons that this model fits in with our overall philosophy:

NOT to teach them everything. When I first began thinking about homeschooling, I was determined to teach my kids as much as possible. It didn’t take me long to realize how unrealistic that approach would be and that they’d actually be missing out on a lot if we tried to cram everything there is to know into the 12-13 short years that they’re in school. I love the freedom that the classical model has given me to completely abandon that notion.


To establish deep roots. Instead of trying to teach everything, then, our goal is to give them deep, strong roots that they can build upon for the rest of their life. For example, by memorizing the history timeline or learning how to draw and label a map of the world, they instantly have context for the things they hear about as they go through their life. When they hear about an unknown historical figure or something happening in the capital of Mozambique, they will have a way to categorize and place that information within the things they’ve already memorized rather than trying to figure out what was happening around the world in the 1890s and or what continent Mozambique is on before they can really understand the significance of the new information.


To teach them to think, discern, write and speak. We also want to give them the tools to evaluate ideas and to present their own thoughts, whether through writing or public speaking. The classical model is language-focused, with an emphasis on reading great literature, using copywork to imitate great writers, presenting ideas verbally, and understanding and using the rules of English grammar rather than just writing creatively.


To enchant them. While I don’t spend a lot of time trying to make schoolwork fun (it’s called work for a reason!), I do want my kids to be enchanted by the things they’re learning. I want them to listen to The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe and imagine themselves stepping through the wardrobe into Narnia. I want them to discover that a number is divisible by 9 if the sum of all the digits is 9 and stare at it in wonder. I want them to learn about animals who migrate thousands of miles each year and stand in awe of their natural instincts. The idea is not to force that enchantment through fun projects and activities but to inspire them to be enchanted by the world around them.


To teach them to learn anything. Remember I said my goal was not to teach my kids everything anymore? The classical model has given me the freedom to let go of that unrealistic goal because instead of trying to give them a education that covers everything there is to know (which is impossible), our goal is to teach them how to learn so that they will be lifelong learners who can learn anything about anything as they go through life.

I’m not an expert, but if you have questions about the classical model, I’d be happy to try to answer them or find the answer for you!

Related posts:
Favorite fantasy books handwriting sheets for older elementary students
Discovering the joy of morning time
Why we don’t stress the sciences in elementary school {even though we think they’re important}
Getting back into the school routine after the holidays and a new baby



     
CommentsThank you! by Thomas AchordHi Thomas! Unfortunately, the tree image itself is from ... by Mandi @ Life Your WayMandi, my name is Thomas Achord. I'm a dean at a classical ... by Thomas AchordHi Becky! Sorry about that broken link. I won't have Cycle ... by Mandi @ Life Your WayEnjoy the practicum! I found your blog by way of searching ... by Becky Brunner 

Weekend reading: May 21, 2016

From Instagram: Learning about loggerhead rescue and rehabilitation {and melting in the heat!}.

Well, I had the best intentions of getting back to my regular blogging schedule this week…and then the baby got roseola. After a few days of fever and fussiness, I was just too far behind to make it happen. But it IS coming (with a fun new header and site design as well!), and as we head back home next week, I’m actually really looking forward to getting back to our regular schedules and routines.

Yesterday we visited Loggerhead Marinelife Center in Juno Beach and I think it may be our new favorite place! We got to see about 15-20 rescued sea turtles at different stages of recovery and learn about the local marinelife, all for a $5 donation at the door for our whole family. The girls are all begging to go back for various activities in the future, and I definitely think we’ll make regular visits!

What I’m reading: Orphan Train: A Novel by Christina Baker Kline, How to Hug a Porcupine: Negotiating the Prickly Points of the Tween Years by Julie A. Ross, M.A., and Find the Good by Heather Lende

What I’m thinking about:

{Follow my personal Facebook feed for the things I’m thinking about and talking about all week!}

Simple things that make a big difference

3 Questions That Reduce My Frustration as a Parent | Andrea Dekker


Gratitude Physically Changes Your Brain, New Study Says | Inc.

Because nothing says summer like a popsicle

Dairy-Free Fudge Pops | Against the Grain


Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup Pops | Chocolate-Covered Katie


Rainbow Popsicles | The First Year

Keep on, keepin’ on

10 reasons you should keep right on ‘mommy blogging’ | A Life Less Frantic


The Tattoo Test: How to know if your idea is great. | Jon Acuff


One question to ask yourself when you’re feeling overwhelmed. | Modern Mrs. Darcy

Have a great weekend!

P.S. I’m sure you’ve seen this by now, but if you haven’t, take a minute to enjoy this woman’s infectious joy and laughter.

Related posts:
Weekend reading: June 6, 2015
Weekend reading: August 15, 2015
Weekend reading: September 19, 2015
Weekend reading: December 19, 2015



     

Weekend reading: May 14, 2016

From Instagram: {Most of} my people.

After a whirlwind few months, we packed up the car the first week of May, making the 18-hour drive to my parents’ new house in Florida. Although we usually drive straight through, we decided to stop halfway and stay in a KOA cabin, which made the trip much more bearable with 6 kids (including a nursing, teething baby), a dog and two fish.

While not exactly a vacation, my hope for this month was to get my work hours back under control (more on this later), wean myself back down to one midmorning cup of coffee (success!), and just have fun with the kids. We’re still juggling work and school (and standardized tests to boot!), but we’ve made time for almost-daily trips to the pool, several outings (including Legoland this coming Monday!) and even a few dates.

I’m also working on some changes here at Life Your Way—again!—that have me excited about getting back to regular blogging. I appreciate your patience with me since Lucas was born!

What I’m reading: Be Frank With Me by Julie Clairborne Johnson, Women of the Word by Jen Wilkin, How to Teach Your Children Shakespeare by Ken Ludwig, The Abundant Mama’s Guide to Savoring Slow by Shawn Fink

What I’m thinking about:

{Follow my personal Facebook feed for the things I’m thinking about and talking about all week!}

Intentional living

Three truths about decluttering: an invitation | The Art of Simple


My thoughts on the Atlantic middle class article | The Frugal Girl


I am more than a computer | Seth Haines

More than productivity

Why I Stopped Hustling, and Why I Wish I’d Done It Sooner | Money Saving Mom


3 Things I Do to Combat Distraction | Wild Olive


Accomplish More with a 3-Item To Do List | Becoming Minimalist


4 Strategies for Surviving (and Thriving) Busy Seasons | No Sidebar

For your homeschool journey

When you just really want to start homeschooling | Simple Homeschool


{And at the end…} Here and Now | Beauty That Moves

Have a great weekend!

P.S. The hashtag #maybehedoesnthityou is trending on social media, and for good reason. This is an important read.

Related posts:
Weekend reading: May 16, 2015
Weekend reading: July 4, 2015
Weekend reading: August 29, 2015
Weekend reading: October 31, 2015



     

Weekend reading: April 30, 2016

From Instagram: This is my reality, y’all: Sean’s been gone for two days, the babies are sick and barely slept last night, it’s rainy and depressing, the 2yo gave up naps today, I have been sitting at my computer for 5 days straight (I’m pretty sure it’s grown into my lap at this point!), I just took my first shower in 3 days, and my children are preparing all of our meals, because this bundle launch is keeping our entire team busy 24/7.

I couldn’t post anymore pretty pictures until I told you that because *this* is life as a work-at-home mom, as much as I’d like to present a perfect picture of balance and grace.

It has been a busy, busy few weeks! On Wednesday we launched this year’s Ultimate Homemaking bundle, and after a month of 40-50 hour work weeks, I’ve been working 12 hour days. The good news in all of this? It means I’ve finally figured out how to work with Lucas around! He’s such a happy baby…just as long as someone is interacting with him, and that has made it hard to figure out how to get work done over the last 6 months. I’m excited to know that when we return to our regular schedule it should be a piece of cake!

(And actually, before we get back to our regular schedule, we’ll be spending three weeks in Florida. I’m really excited for that schedule!)

Because I have read nothing but bundle stuff for the past couple of months, I wanted to share my very top picks with you today. It’s hard not to gush over this bundle, but here’s what you need to know at a glance:

There are 93 products in the bundle: 70 ebooks, 9 ecourses and 14 printables
This total value is $1,102.49 PLUS $303.49 in bonus offers.
Altogether, you’ll get more than 1240 recipes and 44 weeks of meal plans at your finger tips!
The bundle includes 9 products that are each worth more than $29.97, the price you’ll pay for the total package (plus 29 more products worth between $10-$29).

And here are my top picks (see more on Instagram or Facebook):

Organizing

The Motivated Moms Chore Planner (May 2016-June 2017)


Teaching Your Kids to Clean by Dana White


Family Systems by Hilary Erickson

Food

Miracle Dough by Tiffany Edwards


Healthy Make-Ahead Breakfasts by Kelly Roenicke


80 Green Thickies Recipes by Katherine Kyle

Motherhood

Mindset for Moms by Jamie Martin


My Life as a Middle School Mom by Angela Hunt


Raising Kids You Actually Like by Sheila Wray Gregoire


Losing It by Luke Gilkerson


Stop Settling for Overwhelmed (eCourse) from Kayse Pratt

Self-Care

Animals: A Grown-Up Coloring Book by Amy Blevins



Color Me Inspired Volume No. 1 AND 2 by Dawn Nicole Warnaar



Jumpstart Your Creativity (eCourse) by Jennie Moraitis

Bonuses You Don’t Want to Miss

MollyGreen.com with a RightNow Media membership: Get unlimited access to more than 10,000 streaming videos including VeggieTales, Adventures in Odyssey, 3-2-1 Penguins, and What’s In the Bible, Boz the Bear and Chuck Swindoll’s Paws & Tales series plus Bible studies and teaching from Francis Chan, John MacArthur, Dave Ramsey, and John Maxwell.


Craftsy: choose a FREE class from a handpicked list of Craftsy courses, including family photography, donut making, slipcover techniques and more

Have a great weekend!

P.S. Don’t forget that the bundle is only available through May 2nd! Get yours now.

Related posts:
Weekend reading: August 8, 2015
Weekend reading: October 3, 2015
Weekend reading: February 20, 2016
Weekend reading: April 9, 2016



     

Chores and allowance for keeping the house clean AND building character

One of the questions I hear most often from other families—blog readers and friends alike—is how we handle chores and allowance as a family. There are so many different approaches out there…

unpaid chores as a contributing member of the family
a regular allowance tied to age rather than chores
paid daily chores
paid optional jobs

As a family, we do a combination of all of these.

For us, chores and allowance offer more than just a way to keep the house clean; they’re also an opportunity to teach so many different values and skills for life—hard work and diligence, team work and entrepreneurship, money management and more.

At a high level that means that our approach looks like this:

1. Everyone pitches in with daily chores because we’re all members of the same family and we work together to keep the house clean and everybody fed.

2. Everyone has the opportunity to pick up regular paid chores that they do on a daily basis as well. My rule is that you get a say in whether you take the regular job, but once you commit it’s yours for a time. And if you complain, it becomes an unpaid chore.

3. We offer lots of job opportunities so that our girls can earn additional money based on their willingness to work.

4. For now, we don’t offer a regular allowance outside of those tied to their chores. In the future, I can see giving them a monthly allowance that they’ll need to budget for clothes, going out with friends, and other various odds and ends to help them practice money management, but for now we pay for those things just because they’re part of the family.

5. We require them to tithe and save out of the money they earn.

On a day-to-day basis, that approach looks like this:

1. Daily chores that we all share and rotate include straightening the house, loading the dishwasher, wiping the kitchen table, taking care of the animals, putting away groceries, straightening the front closet, helping with the babies, etc.

2. Paid jobs include laundry, wiping the kitchen cabinets (how do they get so dirty?), cleaning the bathrooms, vacuuming, etc.

3. Additional job opportunities include things like babysitting for a set period of time, helping me with computer projects, pulling weeds, washing pots and pans after we let it get out of control (which really only takes a day of cooking in this house!).

4. We have a weekly budget for groceries, eating out and other extras that include ice cream and movie dates, supplies for projects they want to work on, etc., so the spending portion of their earnings is almost exclusively for fun stuff they want to spend it on.

5. We talk about “living on 50% of their income” and setting aside the other half for tithes (10%) and savings (40%). I have a Capital One 360 savings account for each of them, and I’ll write them a check for their savings and let them help me deposit it via the mobile app so they can see the balance growing each time.

A couple of years ago I created this printable time card for them to use to track their earnings, and it’s one we still use. However, we’ve had issues with it getting lost or taken off the bulletin board, so we now keep it on a clipboard in the kitchen. If you lose it, you don’t get paid, so I highly recommend that they leave it attached to the clipboard at all times. (It’s also their responsibility to write down their jobs if they want to get paid.)

***

Although our chores and allowance routines have been in place for a couple years now, our top focus over the past year has been making sure that our girls are really helping with the chores it takes to keep our house clean because the workload is just too much for Sean and I without their help. While I have been very happy with the changes we’ve made so far, there are a couple areas where we’ve still been struggling:

getting the bathrooms really clean
knowing which jobs to assign when to keep the house decently clean on a regular basis

As I was selecting products for this year’s Ultimate Homemaking Bundle, I was selfishly looking at them through this lens. I wanted to find ebooks, ecourse and printables that would help reduce the stress of running my home, with the assumption that these things would help you as well.

Because I had early access to the bundle, I’ve been using several of the products for the past month or so to do just that, and I really love the difference these are actually making in our home:

Teaching Your Kids to Clean by Dana White ($5)

This whole ebook is wonderful, but tucked in the middle is the real gem—a photograph of a toilet with arrows and numbers to show kids exactly how to clean the toilet, making sure they clean the least germy areas first, prompting them to use new rags or wipes after especially germy areas, and reminding them to clean the oft-forgotten areas. Dana from A Slob Comes Clean included this for nonreaders, but I’ve printed it out specifically for my big girls because I was so tired of having to go behind them each time they cleaned the bathroom!

The Motivated Moms Chore Planner (May 2016-June 2017) ($8)

The Motivated Moms system takes all the tasks needed to run your home and divides them into daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly tasks, which are scheduled right on the planner for you. I’ve never used a chore planner like this before, but I love that I can just assign those tasks to our girls (adding them to their daily checklist) and feel confident that we’re keeping our home clean overall.

Cleaning Around the Seasons by Becky Rapinchuk ($10)

Becky, aka Clean Mama, truly is the queen of clean, and she wrote this ebook to help readers spring clean no matter how much time they had to devote to it—a day, a week, or a whole month. Although we haven’t had a chance to dive into it yet, it includes printable checklists and more to take the stress out of spring cleaning, and that will make it easy to divide these tasks among our family as well!

The Nester’s Cozy Minimalist Mom eCourse ($29)

Myquillyn Smith, aka The Nester, has been encouraging women for years that “it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful,” and in this course she’s partnered with a friend to help moms address the clutter that comes with children and family to create cozy, beautiful homes around the Legos and Barbies and craft supplies. I am very much looking forward to this course to see if we can finally get on top of the persistent clutter that seems to take over the house every day despite our best efforts!

Grove Collaborative’s Special Bonus Offer

In addition to the products in the bundle itself, there are several amazing bonus offers, including a wonderful collection of products from Grove Collaborative! New customers will get a FREE Cleaning Kit, including Mrs. Meyer’s Soap Dish, Mrs. Meyer’s Multi-Surface, Grove Collaborative Glass Spray Bottle, Grove Collaborative Walnut Scrubber Sponges, plus a FREE VIP trial.

The minimum checkout for their cart is $20, but with the special discounts they’re offering, you’ll walk away with more than $75 worth of products for less than $30, including one of these handy cleaning caddies. We’ve purchased a few of these and love that they make it easy to keep cleaning supplies together and to carry them from room to room.

***

The resources I listed are just a few of the “Organization and Routines” section of The 2016 Ultimate Homemaking Bundle, which is just one category out of eleven to help you take the stress out of homemaking. 

Although the bundle contains more than $1,000 worth of resources, it’s on sale this week only for just $29.97—and that makes it a sweet deal even if you only ever use a couple of 93 eBooks, eCourses and printables!

You’ll find resources that have been handpicked (by me!) on the things that truly matter to you:

organization, routines & creating a cozy home
recipes, grocery shopping and meal planning
budgeting and saving money
motherhood (no matter what age your kids are)
cultivating a strong marriage
faith (for you & your kids)
and even self-care (like exercise, weight loss, life planning and coloring books!)
and much more…

Click here to see everything that’s included. Don’t wait too long to get yours because once the sale ends on May 2nd, it’s gone for good. And with a 30-day money back guarantee, what do you have to lose?

Related posts:
Rotating seasonal wardrobes with older kids
On obedience and the right to an opinion
The one-pile cleaning method for kids
How to have the perfect Mother’s Day



     

When the clutter is getting to you…

 

Several weeks ago I sent an email asking you what your biggest struggle was right now. While several of you shared your heartfelt stories of divorce and cancer and pain, for many of you the struggles were more in the everyday—getting organized…and staying that way, feeding your family healthy food without slaving away in the kitchen, finding the motivation to do the things that need to be done, and so on.

These are struggles I understand well, and even though I’m an organizing blogger, they’re things we’ve really been struggling with over the last year as well.

Fast forward to today. Since 2011, I’ve been helping put together ebook bundles to help homemakers address these common struggles. This year we’re releasing the 4th annual Ultimate Homemaking Bundle, but…

Can I let you in on a little secret?

This is the first time that I’ve loved the bundle so much that I couldn’t wait to start using it. In fact, I printed out tons of great resources about a month ago and have been using them faithfully ever since.

This year’s collection includes 93 ebooks, ecourses and printables plus more than $300 in free bonuses, all designed to help you take the stress out of homemaking!

The total package is valued at more than $1300 and include topics such as mothering, organization and cleaning, recipes and kitchen helps, spiritual growth for both moms and kids, frugal living, and even working at home.

To sweeten the pot, we’ve also teamed up with 9 companies to bring you over $300 in bonus offers, giving you an affordable opportunity to get products you’ll use and love for only the cost of shipping, or in some cases, entirely for free! (Like gorgeous journals, kids craft boxes, beauty products and more!)

Here’s what you need to know about the sale:

When? 8 a.m. EDT Wednesday, April 27 until 11:59 p.m. EDT Monday, May 2

What? 70 eBooks, 9 eCourses, and 14 printable packs PLUS over $250 worth of bonus products you’ll really use!

Where? Purchase the bundle here.

How much? Well, if you’ve purchased a bundle before, you know it’s going to be a good deal. The entire package is worth $1300, and you can get it for just $29.97 this week only!

What’s in the Ultimate Homemaking Bundle?

Click here to see the full list.

Look for things like The Nester’s Cozy Minimalist Mom course (normally $39!), the Motivated Moms Chore Planner, Tsh Oxenreider’s Upstream Field Guide (regularly $59!).

Check out the more than 1200 recipes and 48 weeks worth of meal plans (complete with shopping lists!), including my own Easy Homemade ebook.

You’ll find printables, practical advice, encouragement, and more!

Plus these special bonus offers…

FREE Mrs. Meyer’s Dish Soap, Mrs. Meyer’s Multi Surface Spray, Grove Collaborative Spray Bottle, Grove Collaborative Scrubber Sponges and FREE 60-day VIP trial with FREE shipping from Grove Collaborative ($30 value)


FREE Online Class from Craftsy ($29.99-$69.99 value)


FREE Kids Discovery Box from GreenKidCrafts.com ($24.95 value)


$15 Gift Certificate to InkWELL Press ($15 value)


$15 Credit to Hope Ink Shop PLUS Two FREE 8×10 Art Prints with Any Purchase ($71)


FREE SPOT Treatment for Acne & Eczema OR a $15 Gift Certificate from Bloom Naturals ($15 value)


FREE 90-Day Pro Membership to ListPlanIt.com ($30)


FREE 1-Year MollyGreen.com Membership ($29 value)


FREE Hand Massage Routine Videos from Melt Couples Massage ($24 value)

But wait! There’s more…

 

When you purchase the bundle before the end of the day on Thursday, you’ll also get a FREE eReader upgrade ($10 value) so that you can load the files onto your Kindle, Nook or other eReader.

So, what are you waiting for?! Get yours today!

You’re going to love it…we promise. (And if you don’t, return it for a full refund within 30 days, no questions asked!)

Related posts:
The one-pile cleaning method for kids
When what you’re doing isn’t working and your home feels chaotic
We’re giving away a printable pack every day this month! {Pin It to Win It}
Have you printed your 2015 Thanksgiving planner?



     

When you blink and they grow up right before your eyes

At one point I had four kids under five years old, so I know what it’s like to live in the trenches. Those are the days that revolve around changing diapers, preparing three meals and two snacks every day, watching your kids like a hawk 24 hours a day, and being just plain exhausted, as much from the monotony of it all as from the work itself.

But, take heart, mamas in the trenches, because having older kids is amazing. {And having older kids at the same times as babies is its own special brand of wonderful!}

A friend of mine has coined the phrase straddle parenting to describe these days of nursing and changing diapers alongside youth group orientation and piano recitals. We’re thinking about introducing solids and potty training one minute and leaving our oldest home by herself for the first time the next.

And while that creates its own challenges when it comes to meeting everyone’s individual needs, it’s also pretty amazing to see our kids growing up while we’re still raising babies because it gives me so much perspective on the younger years!

I assign schoolwork and the big girls can do most of it without any help from me.

They make donuts and baked oatmeal, scrambled eggs and naan pizzas, chicken parmesan and carrot souffle.

They scrub the toilets, do laundry from start to finish, sweep and vacuum.

They put away groceries, walk the dog, water the garden.

They can put on their own snow clothes and bathing suits (hallelujah!), fill their own water balloons, and carry their own ski gear.

The 11-year-old gives the 2-year-old a bath. The 10-year-old rocks the baby when he’s fussy. All four girls take turns babysitting during the day while I work.

They pack lunches and suitcases, set their own alarms, sign in for their own medical appointments.

They go outside to play for hours at a time, stopping in only to refill their water bottle or use the bathroom.

The understand sarcasm and humor at a whole new level, and we can discuss everything from faith to world events. Not to mention we read some of the same books now and have conversations about the plot lines and characters and what we think the author could have done differently.

We’re just entering adolescence, so our girls are in the sweet spot between the physical exhaustion of little kids and the emotional exhaustion of raising teens. And our home is chaotic and crazy and messy.

But in the midst of it all, it hits me at some point every day how different life is now from just a few years ago!

So hang in there, moms of littles—it gets easier and more fun with time. Keep doing the work of assigning chores and letting them “help” and teaching independence. One day you’ll look over and notice them getting ready to go outside all by themselves and it will hit you that they’re growing up!

For the days when dishes are piled up in the sink, you’re pulling clean underwear out of the drier for your potty training toddler, your kids need a bath (and a haircut, too), and dinner is looking like scrambled eggs (again), Stephanie and Beth are offering an honest, candid and incredibly encouraging FREE video series just for moms. It’s called “The Truth About #MomFail Culture: 10 Things You Need to Hear on the Hard Days.”

Stephanie and Beth are not only popular bloggers, but they’re also moms in the trenches. They’ve got 8 kids and almost 20 years of mothering experience between them, and they want you to know two things:

You are not a failure. Most of us feel this way far more than we ever admit.


All the ways you failed?? How awful you did today or last week? It’s just not true. You’re doing better than you think.

The series  won’t solve all your problems, and much as they wish they could, they can’t reach through the computer and fold that Mount Laundry for you. But we can all benefit from a fresh perspective and encouragement from someone who really gets it.

Each video is short – around 10 minutes, and you can watch it on any sort of device and whenever you’ve got a few spare minutes.

Click here to access this video series today. (Just enter your name and email to sign up. You’ll get access to the first video today, and then one per day after that!)

Related posts:
Why I’m buying my 8-year-old her first bra
How we’re using spiral notebooks to simplify
Double the snuggles {how we’re juggling a newborn and a toddler}
Can you ever get just *one* tattoo?



     

Weekend reading: April 9, 2016

From Instagram:First family ice cream date of 2016.

This weekend I’m in the foothills of the Allegheny Mountains at Winsome, where I’m speaking about moving from perfectionism and fear to authenticity and freedom in our relationships with one another, ourselves, and Christ. I’m not sure if the recordings will be available publicly, but if they are and I don’t make a complete fool of myself, I’ll share it!

As I was getting ready to leave this week, I couldn’t help but wonder how the calendar page that had looked so wide open last fall was suddenly so. very. full. It seems that every one of our kids’ friends has a spring birthday, all of our activities are ending with big celebrations, and—just for fun—we’re preparing our home for new landscaping as well.

Thankfully, the calendar wasn’t full then, and I blocked off this weekend for some time away because I sure need it!

What I’m reading: Bel Canto (P.S.) by Ann Patchett

What I’m thinking about:

{Follow my personal Facebook feed for the things I’m thinking about and talking about all week!}

Living authentically

On going gray in my thirties | The Art of Simple


3 Simple Questions to Find Your Best Self | No Sidebar


Take It {Self Care for the Best You} | Smallish

For the introvert

11 Comics Every Introvert Will Understand | Buzzfeed


An Introvert’s Guide to Having People Over | Nesting Place

On books and boredom

3 reasons your read-aloud book is taking too long | Simple Homeschool


Se7en’s Great Big List of the 100 Best Non-fiction Books for Kids… | se7en


In praise of being bored. | Modern Mrs. Darcy

Have a great weekend!

P.S. This is a few weeks old now, but it’s the most beautiful post I’ve ever read about motherhood and faith.

Related posts:
Weekend reading: April 25, 2015
Weekend reading: May 23, 2015
Weekend reading: July 11, 2015
Weekend reading: November 7, 2015



     

On buying expensive pants and figuring out how to wear them

Fighting the frump is an ongoing goal for me. I’ve never been particularly fashionable {unlike my very fashionable mom and sister}, and I’ve had to make extra effort since becoming a mom to do things like wear earrings, step outside of my comfort zone with clothes, etc.

But as a work-at-home, homeschooling mom, fighting the frump is an almost daily battle. There are weeks when I pretty much live in sweats, and while I will defend my right to do so to the death (heh!), the truth is it does affect the way I feel about myself. But in order to break that habit, I have to have clothes in my closet that are comfortable and cute.

Which is why I love Stitch Fix and having someone else select clothes for me, forcing me to step out of my sweats and try new things. {I have the feeling that the people who don’t love it already have strong senses of style and don’t really want someone else picking out their clothes!}.

Because Stitch Fix items range from $45 – $100+ {before the 25% discount for keeping everything in your box}, I have a simple rule for myself: I must be able to put together 3-4 outfits with each item before I decide to keep it; otherwise I run the risk of letting an expensive item just sit in the closet. This rule is also helping me choose versatile items as part of my capsule wardrobe.

Recently I’ve been updating my pants collection with pants that fit my post-6th-baby body and don’t fall off my bum when I bend over.

I’ve gotten two pairs of  Kut from the Kloth boyfriend jeans—one regular, one distressed—as well as a pair of coveted coral printed Emers.

I love the versatility of both the jeans and the printed pants for dressing up or down, as you’ll see below. And thanks to Kelly Snyder’s Adore Your Wardrobe course—which will open up for new registrations again in May—I feel like I’m starting to get the hang of dressing my body type and putting together outfits according to the rule of four. {Sign up here to be notified when the course reopens; you won’t regret it!}

Here are a few of those outfits…

1 | olive tee (hand-me-down from my sister, Express), Kut from the Kloth Maribel jeans (Stitch Fix), owl necklace (Old Navy), beaded bracelet (unsure), silver/gold flip flops (hand-me-down, Gap)

2 | Fun2Fun Alfredo Crew Neck Blouse (Stitch Fix), Kut from the Kloth Maribel jeans (Stitch Fix), gray cultured pearl necklace (unknown), Word of the Year Bracelet (Lisa Leonard), Greystone flats (Tieks)

3 | red & blue plaid shirt (hand-me-down, American Eagle), Kut from the Kloth Maribel jeans (Stitch Fix), Word of the Year Bracelet (Lisa Leonard), red flats (Toms)

4 |Market & Spruce Kristah Ruffle knit blazer (Stitch Fix), blue striped tee (Target), Kut from the Kloth Maribel jeans (Stitch Fix), silver bangle bracelets (unknown), Greystone flats (Tieks)

I’d really like to get a pair of cute plain white tennis shoes to wear with these jeans as well, but I haven’t been able to find quite what I’m looking for!

1 |Fate Gradon Sheer Raglan Seam sweater (Stitch Fix), Romolo Parkside Stone Bauble necklace (Stitch Fix), coral printed Emers (Stitch Fix), Greystone flats (Tieks)

2 | blue v-neck tee (Target), Word of the Year bracelet (Lisa Leonard), coral printed Emers (Stitch Fix), silver/gold flip flops (hand-me-down, Gap)

3 | Market & Spruce Kristah Ruffle knit blazer (Stitch Fix), white lace tank (Target),Romolo Parkside Stone Bauble necklace (Stitch Fix), coral printed Emers (Stitch Fix), Greystone flats (Tieks)

By far, this outfit is the surprise winner. I hadn’t even thought of this one until I was in the middle of taking these pictures and decided to try the blazer over this striped tee from Target, but I love the way it came together and plan to wear this when I speak at Winsome this weekend!

The blazer is another Stitch Fix item (of course!), and one that I was on the fence about keeping since I do live in sweats so much, but I’m so glad I kept it because I love everything about it—the flare at the waist, the ruffles in the back, and the soft cotton material!

If you’re living in sweats or struggling to find your style, I highly recommend giving Stitch Fix a try. And don’t forget to register for news about the upcoming Adore Your Wardrobe course!

This post contains affiliate links, but I’m an enthusiastic fan of both Stitch Fix and Adore Your Wardrobe!

Related posts:
A Stitch Fix review—the wins and the fails after four fixes
How we approach makeup with our girls
7 things I’ve learned about Stitch Fix from the buy/sell/trade group on Facebook
My Stitch Fix capsule {and creating a wardrobe I adore}



     

The gift of perspective

It’s funny, really, because when we decided to add “one more baby” to our family (to recap, that was two babies ago), I knew I wanted to soak up every moment. I planned for several months of maternity leave, and in a lot of ways I approached Jackson’s birth as a do-over for all of my regrets from the girls’ early years.

It was bliss, but it also took a lot of work to make it happen.

Lucas’ pregnancy and birth, on the other hand, caught us completely by surprise, and nothing about it was easy…yet his transition into our family has actually been fairly seamless.

Despite the upheaval of adding a baby who is very particular about when and how he sleeps and who needs a ton of interaction to stay happy, and despite the fact that I’m working full-time and spent much of the first quarter of this year traveling, I’ve been less stressed than with previous babies, and I’ve managed to avoid postpartum depression this time around.

Now, some of that is definitely due to having four big girls, all of whom can take babysitting duty (and at least one of whom can soothe him as well as I can unless he’s hungry!). And some of it is due to experience, for sure. I first noticed it when I made plans to take all six of them out by myself the first time, which turned out to be a non-event altogether. We just did it, and it was fine.

But a bigger part has been due to this shifting perspective within myself. I know that this time is short—and I understand that not just intellectually but deep down in my heart. I’ve realized that planning and routines have their place but that trying to do things perfectly often leads to much more stress than embracing the imperfect.

For example…

Sleep

Oh, sleep. Wherefore art thou, precious sleep?

I had high hopes that this would be our baby who finally slept…right until our first night home from the hospital, when he refused to sleep anywhere but my arms. We’ve continued to try different positions and routines, and we even had a brief phase where he’d sleep for 6 hours or so in the Rock ‘n Play, but he changes his preferences constantly (“I want to sleep on my back today! Today I prefer my tummy!”), which has left us without any kind of consistent sleep schedule. Right now we are back to being full-fledged co-sleepers so that I can simply roll him from one side to the other when he’s hungry at night, but it’s not really working for us, and the truth is I’m exhausted…almost too exhausted to figure out how to get us on a better routine.

But with five babies before him who haven’t been great sleepers and now all sleep amazingly well, I also know it won’t last forever. I don’t obsess over the lack of sleep or things I could try, and my answer to, “How did he sleep?” is pretty much always, “Like a baby.”

Working at Home

As a recovering workaholic and someone who has been to burnout and back, I understand the importance of set work hours and protecting our family time. But I also know that trying to get work done while the girls pester me for help with their school work or the boys fall apart because they just want their mama is the number one trigger for stress and postpartum depression for me.

So this time, instead of worrying about the perfect schedule, I’m holding my work hours loosely and getting them in wherever they fit. That means my work is spread across 7 days of the week instead of 5. It also means that many days I end up closing my computer while I focus on homeschooling and chores and then work into the evening. And I’ve been working until midnight several times a week and then sleeping in with the baby until 7 or 8 even though I really miss my early morning hours.

Homeschooling

In the months before Lucas was born, our family wholeheartedly adopted a morning time routine that included read alouds, language arts as a group, memory work, fine arts and more. The first time we sat down to do morning time after his birth was disastrous, however, as were our second and third attempts. I spent more time juggling the babies and trying to get them settled than actually doing morning time, and I felt the stress beginning to creep in.

Rather than beat myself up or try to white knuckle my way through, I decided to simply set aside morning time for a season. Thankfully, that approach worked the way I hoped, and we’re slowly diving back into the morning time routine a couple of days a week.

Bible Study

Even my approach to Bible study has changed. While I love my physical Bible and doing studies with pen and paper, I’ve struggled to do that with a baby in my arms. And when he’s not in my arms, I have a million other things vying for my attention—physical chores and work that has to get done.

Despite my reluctance to do so, I finally embraced Bible study apps like My Utmost for His Highest and She Reads Truth for being able to still read God’s Word on a regular basis without needing both hands free and a table to hold all of my paraphernalia.

I just last week dove back into a paper Bible study (Katie Orr’s Everyday Faith), since I can sit on the floor next to him and keep him fairly happy while I do the study.

***

I’m human (and a fairly type-A, task-oriented human at that), so I’m anxious to get back to our regular routines. But this time is short. Our life has enough stress simply because there are eight of us, and I know that setting too many expectations about what we can or will get done in a day hurts more than it helps!

Related posts:
Why, yes, we DO have our hands full!
How to have the perfect Mother’s Day
We’re planning an 11-month RV trip…for real! #EhmanAdventure2018
Capturing the hearts of my girls in 2016



     
CommentsGood for you, Mandi! I've thought of you so many times as I ... by Kristen @ Joyfully Thriving