L.M. Long's Blog, page 6

Off to college

Well, today I am writing about an event all moms face, sending your first child off to college. My eldest daughter just started for winter and spring term and I went with her to set her up in her apartment.

I was so excited to go. It has been 20 plus years since I've been on a college campus and I still remember the incredible times and amazing friends. As I traveled with my daughter I couldn't help but wonder what her experience would be like. She is rooming with three other Freshman girls and right from the start I knew that they'd all click. Phew. One worry down. 
Next thought, will she have enough to eat? When I left she had enough food to last for a month, lol. I couldn't help myself. I filled her pantry and then some. One of her roommate's even asked me, "Where is she going to put all that food?" I went to three different grocery stores and scoped them out. The night before I left I took her to one that delivers food. We went aisle by aisle and wrote down the name and cost of everything she might ever order. Yep, total overkill, but I'm a mom. Another big issue- food allergies. I made sure each roommate knew about her peanut allergy and then made her duct tape her epi-pen to the fridge. Another worry down.
I stayed long enough to help her add and drop classes. She finally ended up with what I think is a peachy schedule. I was thrilled that she took my advice.
But, now I am home and the real trial begins- missing her. How do other mom's deal with this? I miss her so much. My other kids introduced me to Skype, and I've done it almost everyday. I can tell she's getting sick of it. When I walk passed her room with all the clutter everywhere it still feels like she's here. My girl is growing up. What a journey! Moms any advice?

New Beginnings by Monique Bucheger

My blog post today is going to run a lot closer to the mommy side of me than the author side. I completely forgot about my December blog post because quite honestly, I was very caught up in trying to be a supportive mother and grandma: both of my married daughters were due to have a new baby within 10 days of each other during the 2014 holiday season.




Levi--a cornucopia of  sweetness

Ammon: A stocking full of joy

Originally, the babies were due December 5th and 15th. My older daughter had been having issues most of her pregnancy and had extremely uncomfortable contractions for weeks—we spent several hours on 3 occasions thinking the baby may come way too early and then thankfully,  just a little early. It was a worrisome time. As you all know, every day a baby has in utero to grow is a good thing—no matter how uncomfortable the mom is.
During that time, I gained a greater appreciation and remembrance for the sacrifices moms make: my daughter was very uncomfortable, more so than I had been during my eight full-term pregnancies.
Being near Thanksgiving, I counted the extra days that my first grandson could stay in utero among the greatest blessings I knew at the time. After dinner on Thanksgiving Day, my daughter did the last of her Christmas shopping. Her water broke as she carried the gifts from the car to the house.  At my home, I had just put away the last of the Christmas gifts and was sitting down with a cup of cocoa when I got the call: “It’s baby time! Meet us at the hospital!”
What a fun way to end a Thanksgiving Day. JMy fourteen year-old daughter and I drove to the hospital to help (I as a labor coach, my younger daughter as a cheerleader.) We arrived around 11 pm. My other pregnant daughter and her husband showed up to visit and encourage my laboring daughter around midnight. I marveled at how things changed from when I delivered my first child almost 27 years ago when you could only have one person in the laboring room, to now, when anybody the mother wanted could be there.
Samuel LeviDuring the actual delivery, the room was cleared to just the parents, the medical staff, and myself—as the labor coach and “mamarazzi.” I took a hundred pictures  after little Samuel Levi arrived: being weighed, bathed, checked out, bundled, cuddled by everyone, his first bath, the first family photos. What a marvelous occasion, the arrival of a baby. Life has a way of fading away the crazy moments and focusing in on what is really important when you hold a newborn in your arms.

My birthday twins and me


Fast forward a week later to Levi’s actual due date, Friday, December 5—which also happens to be my youngest son’s and my birthday—my other pregnant daughter is feeling “weird.” She was due Dec 15th, but would deliver no later than Dec 8th. My son-in-law, daughter, and I decide to do a little 4-wheeling  to a site on some back roads where my son-in-law likes to shoot soda pop cans for target practice. I held out a small hope that her baby would come on my birthday, but it was okay that he didn't.







Ammon Ryder



Fast forward to Monday morning—induction day! As soon as I dropped my youngest five kids off to school, I hurried to the hospital to see how my daughter’s labor was progressing.  All in all, well. Water broken, Pitocin introduced, discomfort rising. Then relief in the form of a professionally administered epidural.  This daughter had witnessed the birth of her youngest brother and had marveled over the years: “Mom, you made childbirth look so easy.” On the day of her first delivery, she made a comment about feeling a little deceived. The world was righted when her epidural kicked in. J








In a few hours my second grandson, Ammon Ryder was welcomed by grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins from both sides of his large extended family. His arrival made me marvel at how people who used to not know one another, could come together to share the great blessing of welcoming a new member—further uniting strangers who have become friends... and family.
Ammon on Christmas Eve
Because I am writing this post at the beginning of a new year and featuring two sweet little boys who have a lifetime of wonder and possibilities ahead of them, I am reflecting on new beginnings.

Each of us has been gifted a new year with 365 empty pages to fill with meaning and purpose for our loved ones and ourselves. Go forth and make the most of them!

Ammon as "Sully", Levi as "Mike"


Make choices that bring joy to those you love. Embrace your dreams and GO for them! Time will pass whether you actively pursue your dreams or whether you do nothing and just let life pass you by.

Be the wind blowing the leaves of your book of life toward a grand adventure, a new romance, a new friend, or new skill, rather than the leaf buffeted about without your permission or input.

Laugh lots, love much, write on!

Balls in the Air!

Motivation has become my new nemesis.

I'm not sure if it's because I feel guilty being idle in an empty house for six hours a day while my kids are at school, or if my 38-year-old body can't keep up with my 18-year-old ambitions. I suffer from OCD - obsessive creativity disorder (self-diagnosis)- and as my husband and children know, I'm not happy if my hands aren't busy. Stop by my house at any given moment and you will likely find me cutting out a new sewing project, cross-stitching yet another whimsical cow, or trying my hand at embroidery.

Usually a good project is a cure-all for me, but lately even the things I love to do make me go "ugh . . . I'd have to get up to do that . . . never mind!" And these are my hobbies, mind you - the things that give me the creative outlet I need, a much-needed break from reality, the "me time" that allows me to act less like a bear coming out of hibernation when my kids start coming off the bus. We're not even talking about the unpleasantness of dishes, laundry, coming up with something halfway decent for dinner, etc., etc. And I haven't even mentioned the taxi duty we find ourselves on with doctor/dentist appointments, music/dance lessons, church activities . . . is your brain starting to hurt yet?!

 As you may imagine, if I do accomplish any of the above, I'm exhausted by the end. So my question is, how do we find time to write? How do we walk away from all those balls in the air and give our story-telling its dues? And even if we find the time, what about the emotional and mental energy it sucks out of us? I don't know if any of you struggle with these same concerns, but as we're all writers and mothers I'm sure you've felt the pinch. Here are just a few things that keep my writing (and sometimes even myself) from falling by the wayside:

 1. SCHEDULE WRITING TIME. Treat it like any other commitment you couldn't or wouldn't neglect - like an appointment. Put it on your calender or in your phone or wherever the schedule portion of your brain lives.

 2. GET OUT OF THE HOUSE. I'm much more accountable for my writing when I'm not at home, being distracted by all those balls. And let's face it, sometimes having my uber-comfy king bed upstairs is too much of a temptation in the afternoons.

 3. IF THE WRITING ISN'T FLOWING, SPEND SOME TIME IMAGINING SCENES. I do this when I'm in the car. Sometimes I even monologue it out, ignoring the strange looks I get from the drivers of passing cars. At least in our day and age I can pass it off for a phone conversation on my blue tooth.

 4. TEAM UP WITH OTHER AUTHORS FOR A WRITING SESSION. This works every time, unless we get sidetracked chatting. But chatting has its benefits too - I have worked out quite a few plot issues just talking it out with another writer.

 5. TAKE LITTLE SNATCHES OF TIME FOR WRITING. Be happy with the result, even if the word count leaves you feeling anti-productive. A book is made up of words, so every little bit helps.

 6. TURN OFF THE TECHNOLOGY. Ignore the little yips and blips your phone makes every time you get an email or text, or every time a friend creates a new Pinterest board. Anything truly important usually comes in the form of a call. Even then, don't answer unless it is your significant other or the school!

 7. PUT PEN TO PAPER WHEN INSPIRATION STRIKES. I realize this isn't always possible. Most the time the writing bug bites me when my whole family is home and wanting my attention, or on a Sunday when I shouldn't be "working". But if you're all lying around watching the latest episode of The Voice and the urge hits, grab your laptop and go for it. Ask yourself if the thing you're missing out on is more important than getting a good scene down.

 8. BE WILLING TO LET GO. This is super hard for me. Sometimes I schedule that writing time, I get out of the house, turn off my phone, and the stars seem to all align . . . until I start typing and I can't get a word down. If this happens, give yourself a break. Be willing to move on and try again another day. If you're having trouble getting a scene down, work on character development or plot or some other aspect of the process. And don't let it sour your mood and ruin your whole day!

Now I think I'll go take my own advice! Happy writing to you all.

Happy New Year!

For me, 2014 was a mixture of major ups and downs. We were trying to sell our house and ran into all kinds of obstacles. It was a huge trial of faith, but I knew we were supposed to move. When the actual sale took a month and a half, I thought I'd go crazy. But after being in this house for eight months (We finally moved in on April 1st - yes, April Fool's Day. I thought it was quite appropriate after what we'd been through), I knew we had to be ready for the neighborhood we were about to move into.
Our kids have friends now. Really close, very good friends. Our house is constantly filled with laughter as friends come over to play. We also have chickens, and rabbits, and cats, and we'll get a few more animals this year. Our kids fight over who gets to feed them because they love having the animals around. And we have space. Lots and lots of space.
The blessings go on and on. Those little things made the headache and heartache I went through at the beginning of the year all worth it.
So now we move onto 2015. We had quite the start when I took my daughter to the doctor and found out she had pneumonia. Poor girl. Hopefully things only get better from here.
We can pause and laugh for a bit.
So, anyway, what do you have in mind for goals this year? Have you figured out where you want to go with your writing? How about life in general? I haven't been one to make resolutions in the past, but then, I wasn't one to make to-do lists either. Apparently I grew up a little in the last couple years. Or my memory is nothing like it used to be and I have to have help remembering things ...
Two years ago, I was bound and determined to get a book published, so that was my resolution. Last year I just wanted to make it through the year with no surgeries. I managed to make both happen. You'd think the surgery one would be easy, but then we had quite a 2012 and 2013.
Anyway, I was at a loss for what I wanted to do this year. I could go all out and say "make a million dollars, reopen my bookstore with a museum and theater attached (in the works for our city arts council that I'm a part of), go to Ireland, and find a prize agent/big five publisher."
But let's not get crazy. Or am I crazy? Can't I take each one of those ideas and just build on them? I can work to improve my writing so that one of those agents might pick me up. I could save up my earnings for a ticket to Ireland. And, like I said, we're working on the theater/museum/bookstore.
I think both goals and dreams are good to have, and when you can intertwine them, it's even better. Come up with where you want to be a year from now, and find ways to get there. Find small things that be accomplished and go from there.
Besides those above, my actual goals are to branch out and hit a few conventions out of state, and find an exercise plan I will actually do. Between the two resolutions, find out-of-state conventions is by far the easier resolution for me.
Good luck with your goals, and I hope 2015 treats you well!

Knowing your Destiny...

Valerie J. Steimle

Over the Christmas season, I had the opportunity to read James A. Owen's  
              Drawing out the Dragons.
Drawing out the Dragons is the first book of The Meditations series Mr. Owen has created to help other people in what ever they want to do.... How can he do that when he is a writer and illustrator? I wasn't sure what to expect.  I had to read this series because as the agreement went I got all three books as e-books of that series for free if I would read and post a review of them. To my delightful surprise, the first book was inspirational. 

For a starters, here is what the description says: 

 "I believe in you. You have a great destiny. You are meant for great things. And it s possible to live a wonderful, extraordinary life."
That is the promise offered by bestselling author and illustrator James A. Owen in this remarkable and inspirational meditation. In Drawing Out the Dragons, James shares personal stories and the deep truths he learned while navigating past obstacles and adversity toward a life of lasting belief and joy. We all have a grand destiny, but sometimes we feel we lack the power to achieve it. But we always have the power to choose. Every drawing, every life, is nothing but a series of choices and actions. Make your lines. Make your choices. . . . What you create from there is entirely up to you. Drawing Out the Dragons has the power to uplift, inspire, and change your life.





Well, that was a shot in the arm for what I needed to read.  Every year by the end of the year, I need to take a writer's break.  Usually by Thanksgiving I run out of writing steam and just need to vegetate until New Year's Day.  It's a natural thing for me and I don't miss writing at all during that time.  I still write in my journal but this rejuvenation period really fills my writer's cup.  I do other things that I normally don't have time for and with my two boys homeschooling I had the chance to do some wonderful end of the year field trips and activities without the worry of a manuscript or other writing assignments. So James Owen's book came at the right time and he wrote such a great story of how he started publishing and what it took to be successful, even after a debilitating car accident when he lost the use of his right arm.


James A Owen has written......


James A. Owen has written and illustrated five books in the bestselling Chronicles of the Imaginarium Geographica series: Here, There Be Dragons, The Search For The Red Dragon; The Indigo King; The Shadow Dragons; and The Dragon's Apprentice. The sixth volume, The Dragons of Winter, and the seventh, The First Dragon, are forthcoming from Simon & Schuster. The series is now being published in more than twenty languages. He is founder and executive director of Coppervale International, an art and design studio that also published the periodicals International Studio and Argosy, develops television and film projects, and is redesigning an entire town, among other ventures. James has written and illustrated two dozen Starchild comics, the Mythworld series of novels, and more. He lives in Arizona with his family.



Now I have started  reading his 2nd book of this series called The Barbizon Diaries which has more inspirational messages and the 3rd book The Grand Design is patiently awaiting when I can open this book as well.

James A. Owen is an inspiration to us all no matter what career path has been chosen as he gives us the tools to be successful.  He sets the example of one who does not give up on his dream.....and isn't that what writers need to hear over and over again?  I think so.

The Man Who Hated Christmas

Many families have traditions they carry out at Christmas, mine included. One involves reading scriptures, singing carols, and reading Christmas stories nightly for the twenty four eves leading up to the day we celebrate the Savior's birth.

One of my favorite stories is called "The Man Who Hated Christmas". 
Yes, that seems an odd choice at first given the season but let me explain. You see the man in the story doesn't hate the true meaning of Christmas, In fact, it's because of his high regard for the Christ child that he is saddened by the commercialism that has become associated with the holiday season. 
His wife is kind of like me, stumped for a really meaningful gift to give her husband for Christmas. Attending one of their son's wrestling match against an inner city team, he remarks how disheartened he is to see the poor boys without helmets or shoes.  
Inspiration strikes the wife and that year she foregoes getting him the usual sweater and tie and instead makes an anonymous donation of helmets and shoes to the inner city boys wrestling team. She places her gift on the tree in an envelope and on Christmas day her husband is delighted with his 'gift'.  So begins a tradition in their family.
As I rushed about stores this morning, mainly grocery shopping, I constantly held back tears, feeling overwhelmed with all I still have to do to be ready to celebrate Christmas. The shopping is done, the wrapping is begun, and all I really have left is to make and deliver treats for the neighbors. Most of my current to do list is unassociated with Christmas at this point. 
So, why the Christmas blues? 
The dread of disappointment of others. 
I'm not one who shows her love by gift giving. What if those I love and care about are unhappy with their presents? What if they are the types that receive love through gifts? How can I ever measure up? My intentions are good, but my execution is lacking. 
Honestly, I'd like to be like the man in the story. Skip my presents and do some good in the world and let me do the same for you. Wouldn't that fit in more with what the Savior taught? What he came here to do? Why we celebrate his birth?  
So, next year, make a charitable donation, put a pair of cozy socks and a bag of peppermint bark in my stocking, and I'd call that a good Christmas. 
What would you do to make your Christmas more Christlike? 

Hearing the Spirit in a World of Chaos

The television.  The Internet.  Computer games.  The telephone.  The cell phone.  Pounding on the door.  Running errands.  Church callings.  Soccer games.  Doctor appointments.  The list goes on and on.  Today we are bombarded with more input than ever before.  Our brains seem about to explode from all the things we must do, places we must go, meals to prepare, dry cleaning to pick up … and then, at the end of the day, we collapse on the couch with barely enough energy to drag ourselves into bed.  We read scriptures with the family that morning, and we did get our family prayer said before we sent everyone to bed, but anything beyond that seems impossible.
And yet, we know we need to be able to hear the voice of the Spirit if we are ever to find peace in this world, to receive guidance for our daily activities, to know what choices to make, and to help us on our journey back to Heavenly Father.  We need that constant comfort and companionship.  How do we block out the sounds of the world so we can hear what is truly a still, small voice?
First, I think it’s important that we minimize the electronic chaos in our lives.  We’ve heard it said in general conference that turning off the television and the computer can be crucial in allowing room for the Spirit.  We obtain a lot of good from the Internet – we can study, read scriptures, find conference talks, do genealogy – but when we allow ourselves to get caught up in the games and the chat rooms, we spend more time on useless entertainment than we do in feeding our souls.  
Second, we can take a few minutes first thing in the morning to go to our knees and ask Heavenly Father to guide our day.  Johnny might need a ride to school and Sally can’t find her shoes, so time might be tight, but we can always fit in a few seconds to ask our Father, who loves us infinitely, to be with us.  Later, after the ride is given and the shoe crisis is averted, we can focus on our scriptures or other uplifting activities, but we’ve gotten our day off to a good start.  It’s okay to speed-pray … I’ve done it before and never felt chastised for it.
Third, we can make our spiritual nourishment a higher priority.  Yes, we may have company coming in an hour, but wouldn’t they rather visit with someone who is centered and calm than with someone who is frazzled from running around the house, scrubbing and trying to make everything perfect?  And if they are the kind of person who would rather sit in a spotless house than care about your stress levels, why are you letting them in your house?  
Fourth, I’m a big believer in the parent time-out.  This is where the mom or dad just goes in their room and closes the door.  They can leave an older child in charge, or they can wait until their spouse comes home, but they shut out the distraction of the rest of the household and be by themselves for a little while.  Sometimes it’s easy to find balance, and other times, it takes an hour, but as couples communicate their needs with each other, and take turns to cool off as necessary, they will find they are much more able to listen to those inner feelings and be guided toward making the right choices. 
Fifth, we can involve our children in our search for peace and calm.  We can make it a learning activity.  Start by playing them loud music, and then play them soft music.  Ask how each makes them feel.  Explain that we like the feelings in our hearts when things around us are softer.  Help them identify the feelings that they have when they are playing nicely together as compared to the feelings they have when they are fighting, and talk about how they would rather feel all the time. 
Last, we can take the moments we do have and make the most of them.  When I go to pick up my daughter from seminary, I often find that I have five minutes of quiet before the bell rings.  I like to close my eyes, breathe deeply, and try to center myself again.  In those quiet moments, inspiration comes and helps me with ideas for the rest of the day.
Above all, never quit trying.  The Lord is aware of our hectic schedules and He knows we don’t always have the opportunity to come to Him in private.  He will listen to us while we drive down the freeway, while we grocery shop … any time we think to speak to Him, He will listen.  And then He’ll take advantage of the first quiet moment we get to answer us.  I’ve seen it happen time and time again.

Christ is the Reason for the Season

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by H. Linn Murphy
About this time every year the pace kicks into holiday mode. We see ever earlier sales. Black Friday is now a holiday children recognize. The Saving Christmas shows pepper the TV, punctuated by ads for glitzy toys, diamonds, gigantic screen TVs, and gleaming sportscars. We run around trying to do, make, and buy everything in time for the Big Day. We run around like ants, busy with making Christmas. But we often forget that Christ is the reason for the season. We not only forget to celebrate His miraculous birth, but the most remarkable gift anyone ever has or ever will give to us: Eternal Life. We forget God's gift to us: namely His Son.
We see all these festive decorations and gifts and helpful hints about how we should celebrate the holidays, but we often fail to see Jesus. And yet we marvel at the people from His own time and place who didn't see Him for what He was. They were too blinded by politics, or disdain for his upbringing and origins, or by their own problems. The Pharisees who should have been His biggest supporters because of their scriptural knowledge, were instead some of His greatest detractors.
 So who did see Him? Not Pilate, who thought of him as a sort of discomforting rabble rouser. Not Herod, rich and selfish King of the Jews. Not the powerful or the knowledgeable. It was the small people--the humble shepherds and servants, the craftsmen shutting their shops for the night, the publicans, and fishermen, and women drawing water at the well.
In this age, knowledge of our Savior gets overshadowed by glitzy movie and sports stars, by the rumble of science disavowing His reality, and by the jeers of the inhabitants of the Great and Spacious Building. We find ourselves either defending Him at every turn, or, like Peter at the cock's crow, weeping at our lack of faith. Sometimes the frantic pace of our lives takes Christ's place and fills the emptiness we've left as we chase the dollar bill, elusive fame, or power.
In the holidays, much of the greed and selfishness comes to a head. The refrain of "Mommy, I want that," fills the frosty air. There have been times when I sat wrapping those last presents that I felt my children had never been such brats all year and I wondered why I was rewarding such wretched behaviors. The gimme children never seemed happy. They fought over everything, especially about serving others by doing their chores. The whole season depressed me. It wasn't until, like Christ, we started focusing on the happiness of others that we started to find our own joy. 

Maybe it's time to buck the crowds, walk back down that Spacious Building ramp, and hop across the stones in the river, back to the Tree of Life. 

I remember once when I was little (we lived in Y Mount Terrace back then--married student housing). I had a Penny Brite doll, which I really loved. One home evening my dad asked us a sneaky question. "What's your favorite toy?" Thinking that I was going to get clothes for her or something equally cool, I piped up with, "My Penny Brite doll is my favorite." My sister, probably sensing more than I did, mentioned something I knew for a fact wasn't her most special toy. Then Dad said something that chilled my childish little heart. "Well then that's the thing we'll give away." My mom then made gorgeous clothes for her, and a box with homemade furniture in it for the doll. Wow. I bawled and bawled. I thought that was a really wretched thing to do. We took those offerings upstairs and gave them to another, poorer family. At first I felt so betrayed. And maybe I was, in a way, since I wasn't allowed to make that choice on my own. But I have never forgotten the way I felt at seeing that other little girl's eyes light up. (Then, because I was about five and selfish, I plotted for a little while on how I was going to take it back--but never did. There is hope.)
Later we enjoyed several 12 Days of Christmas forays. One time we lived in Oregon. My parents had moved down to Arizona and left my sister and me up there because of jobs and school, etc. That Christmas was going to be a little bleak for us. But also Mom had left lots of friends without a champion. Patricia was one of those friends. This season was especially lonely for her. She'd recently lost her husband and was feeling the pinch, once remedied by my mom's kindness. So my sister Lisa and I decided to do the 12 Days of Christmas on her. We bought all kinds of things we thought Patricia would like: a back scratcher, cans of soup, slippers, books, goodies and several other items. We thought we were being so sneaky running up to her porch, dropping the item for the day, ringing the bell, and racing away. Then one day we got caught. We were hiding in her bushes when some woman we didn't know walked out to the front porch and yelled, "Hey! Whoever you are, Patricia moved. You can have all the stuff we didn't eat back again!"

I remember thousands of meals my mom made and took to other people. I remember baking bread and every time we took it out of the oven, without fail the missionaries were there for a slice. Everybody stayed at our house--Young Ambassadors, BYU Folkdancers, Up With People kids, German Club kids, the indignant runaway children of friends. Everyone. I remember my mom giving everything from her suitcase to women in Zimbabwe, only coming home with what she was wearing and a skirt for me. She went to do service, handing out massive amounts of clothing, food, and sock dolls she made by hand. I remember her and my dad cleaning out ICU's and orphanages in Bulgaria and taking food and water to Bande Atche (or however you spell it), the epicenter of the tsunami in Indonesia. And I think of all the presents I've given her that she's turned around and given to other people. My mom lives to give. Thousands of people bless her name. That's how I want to be. Someday I'll make it.
I hardly remember any presents I ever got. What I do remember are those I gave that took some trouble. I remember their faces and how it felt to do something for someone else. Imagine, then, how Christ must feel when we accept His offerings. When we come humbly to kneel at His feet and give our lives into His careful hands, it must fill Him with exquisite joy. 

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A Writer's Life

The life of a writer is different for each person. I personally use my own history and friends as fodder. Yep, in fact when I'm searching for names I find nothing works better than going through the friends I've made over the last forty years and looking for something that stands out. You want a name that sticks in peoples minds? Don't make it up, use one that is real. For my first published work the last name of my main character was Bogus. At school visits I am asked about my choice and I can honestly say that one of my besties growing up was Denise Bogus. What fun it is to use the names of people I care about and immortalize them in print. Another best friend growing up was Sara, and yes, the full name of my character was Sara Bogus.
Now, I do have to tell my friends that even though I use their names, the characters themselves in no way represent the person. In my just released YA, The Awakening, one of my characters is named John. His name comes from someone  I grew up with named Jon. He was really wild and tough. In the book though, John has allergies and can't fight. So, not my Jon, but just using his name makes me smile. And I hope it makes him smile too knowing that I was thinking of him.
Random events aren't safe either. I look back at my life as open season. When I write I include events that I remember happening, or at least imagined, growing up. When I'm writing about a school, I often picture my own schools and in my mind, the layouts match up. When I'm writing about something embarrassing, I often place myself in the shoes of my character and think about how I would have reacted, or actually use a real event.
As a writer, I am very observant of the world around me. It's true what they say, "Watch out. I'm a writer. You might end up in my book." I often see things in real life that  beg to be included in print. And my kids, yep I listen to their conversations to see what teenage dialog is all about these days. I'm kind of like a pirate that way. Of course, they also like to read my rough drafts and groan. 
What fun it is to be a writer? I am thankful for my gift of storytelling and imagination. - Dorine

12 Indie Publishing Blunders to Avoid!

Misty Dawn Pulsipher

My good friend, Lisa Rector is self-publishing her first novel as we speak. I have done this two times, but for some reason we forget all the little details in between books when it comes to formatting and such. So it occurred to me that this might be helpful information for Indie Authors everywhere.

First of all, I used to think 'Indie' was one of two things: a nationality or a car race. Apparently, it's actually the term used for self-publishing. So here is what I've learned about Indie publishing over the last few weeks:

 1. When you think you have a final draft on your hands, you will make approximately 800 changes to your 'proof copy' once it arrives and you're done celebrating.

 2. You will go through about 3 packs of sticky notes, because you don't want to write in your proof copy.

 3. By the time you're done with the proof copy, you'll want to burn it.

4. Do yourself a favor and don't bother manually indenting your paragraphs with tabs. You will end up deleting every one of them when you convert your file to HTML for the Kindle Edition. Instead, highlight all your text (minus chapter headings), go to LINE SPACING, LINE SPACING OPTIONS, SPECIAL (select FIRST LINE), then LEFT INDENT and make the indent that you want. It will apply the indent to the first line of every paragraph throughout your document.

5. Instead of putting a few spaces between chapters, insert a page break (CONTROL+ENTER).

6. SECTION BREAKS are a catastrophe waiting to happen. Use with extreme caution and only when absolutely necessary.

7. When it comes right down to it - prevent unpleasantness such as ulcers and nervous breakdowns by paying someone else to format your book. Create Space does it starting at $249. You'll pay more than that in acid reflux medication and counseling alone - so it will totally be worth it.

8. Watch out for backward quote marks - they will be your undoing ... just ask Melissa Lemon.

9. Order a paperback proof copy and read through it - seeing your book in that format helps you think like a reader and not like a writer - and helps to identify plot/character issues and inconsistencies.

10. If you are a perfectionist like me, take it down a notch and be willing to let insignificant things go. Like each chapter starting on the right page instead of the left. You will drive yourself and everyone around you crazy otherwise.

11. To convert your document to HTML for the Kindle Edition, click SAVE AS then select WEB PAGE FILTERED.

12. Think of the whole thing as a process rather than an event. And One More Thing . . . While you're so absorbed with things like margins, page breaks, chapter headers, and indents . . . don't forget to check the spelling of your OWN NAME on the COVER. For some reason I never noticed the H missing from my last name, even though I'd gazed lovingly at my cover for hours on end and held the proof copy in my hands.

On launch day, after I had finally approved all the proofs and clicked the little "publish" button with glee, a friend noticed the spelling error. It was another day before it was fixed and re-uploaded. In the immortal words of Mad-Eye Moody, "Constant Vigilance!"

Get Lisa's debut novel here: