Cate Ellink's Blog, page 67

Wildlife Wednesday - more emus

I wrote a post on Emus in October here, but we saw so many this past holiday, I thought I'd add them here. Plus, I find them so funny, especially when they run, that I had to share. And I have sitting emus - something I hadn't seen before.

So for your enjoyment - Emus...

Emu and chick at Mungo
Emu and both chicks, Mungo 
Emu and chicks almost off the road - Ivanhoe to Wilcannia

3 emus crossing - and we're slowing, luckily because...
there were 3 more to cross! This is the last one - we missed them, but I'm glad there weren't 3 more!
Emus standing
Emus sitting!

Sunday Story - holiday ramblings

No reading done lately and no writing either. I went travelling with Mr E again. I don't know why but somehow when we travel I find no time for words. It's not that we talk a lot. I think it's because we do lots of kilometres and I like to look and think.

My first lot of study was in environmental biology, so landforms, vegetation and fauna interest me. I love watching the changing scenery. And this trip, we went out to Western NSW which has had three good wet years in 2010, 2011 & 2012. This year it's back to the usual drought, but animals were prolific. I've never seen so many emus, and goats. Lots of roos, and falcons and crows. The last few times I've been out there has been really dry for a long time. So to see it with lots of vegetation, even if dry, was great. So, lots of looking and thinking and comparing.

Then I need lots of sleep. I have CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome), although luckily not as badly as it could be even if it frustrates the heck out of me. Driving is wearying for me - even the passenger seat driving I do! So to sleep for ten hours is necessary after the 500km drive. So my reading/writing time is chomped into.

But...if writing is to be a career, should I be able to write when travelling?  Or should travelling just be holidays - a time for recharging?

Our ultimate dream is to travel while I work. But I might need to rethink this since I can't seem to find time for work on the last two trips! Or maybe we need to drive less. Mr E loves to drive, so pulling him up is kind of difficult. I'd love to write while he drives but I'm a control freak and I get car sick. LOL. I am the worst passenger. I sometimes think Mr E would like to toss me out, especially when my brakes aren't working no matter how hard I slam the floor.

Oh, and I take photos. Hundreds of them. And with digital cameras I can shoot out the window as we fly by scenes. If they don't work, just delete.

Sometimes there's so much more to do than read and write! I can't believe I said that!

Phallic Friday - "topping from the bottom"

I used this phrase in a post last week, and my most prolific commenter asked me to do a post to explain it.
So... this is for you, Lily. My explanation of what it means.

(Please be aware that my understanding of the BDSM world is rudimentary. This is my understanding and you may well have another description of the term. If so, please feel free to comment).

This term "topping from the bottom" is used about the BDSM world. Part of BDSM involves Submission from Submissives (people who give control of their pleasure to another person) and Domination by Dominants/Doms/Dommes (people who get pleasure from controlling another's pleasure).

In the 'normal' role of a submissive, he/she allows the Dominant to dictate the play/sexual acts/the pleasure giving. Truly submissive people play no role in directing what happens. They have a safe word which can be used when they cannot cope with going any further, but otherwise, their pleasure involves the giving over of themselves to another.

If a submissive is new, struggling to fit into the role, unbelieving/untrusting of the Dominant, having a bad day, not into the role, (any number of reasons) they may struggle with allowing someone to direct their pleasure. They may speak, give commands, back chat, surreptitiously direct the scene, move their body to change how something works, or make some kind of act that takes control from the Dominant. If the submissive is directing how the pleasuring occurs, then they're said to be "topping from the bottom" - in other words, pretending to submit when they are actually dictating the play from a supposedly submissive position.

In the book I was reading where I saw this happening, the male was the submissive. He was an alpha male, a protector, a strong strong man ... who liked to submit and allow Dommes (female dominants) to work with him. Except he always managed to have them allowing him to give them pleasure. He loved cunnilingus. He also loved to fill a woman, and so manipulated the women in subtle ways, to allow this to happen. For example, he showed greatest pleasure when women got wet, dripped, showed themselves to him. Subtly, he was letting them know what he wanted... and they gave it to him. This isn't something that's 'wrong'... it brings pleasure to both people... but in the true sense of being submissive, it's cheating. But if you're both happy, who cares?

But this is where the book got into my head. The Dominant worked this sub out. She knew what he was doing. She was fairly new, but extensively trained as a Domme. She wasn't just mucking around, she wanted the lifestyle - and he said he did too. So she made him submit to her. She refused him contact with her. He didn't get to eat her out, or fill her. She made him take an anal vibe set on a timer, and left him to orgasm three times in an hour, alone, with viewers. Not something he thought he'd like...but the submission turns him on anyway.

Her action was clever. It takes away his usual pleasure. It makes him bend to her will. It stops him dictating what he wants and what she does. It makes him submit. To her. And she's earned his respect - he's received pleasure, she's held off on her own, except the pleasure from making him submit.

But the book was even more clever. He wasn't broken easily. He tested her every time they were together. He knew it. She knew it. So it's a complete mind-fuck as well as the physical.

And that to me is a really powerful BDSM story.

I hope that's given a bit more of an understanding of the term. And I hope my interpretation hasn't offended anyone.

Wildlife Wednesday - Blue Tongue Lizard

This is a picture post today. I have a Blue Tongue Lizard in my backyard who I've become quite friendly with. So I'm sharing some images. I've not played with these photos at all - that really is the colour of his/her tongue (easy seeing where the name came from)! And the tongue is huge...surprised me when it flicked out and out and out and out! The blue-tongue is rather on the large size as well!

Sunday Story - movies and books

Movie posterI went to the movies the other day to see The Turning. It's the movie adaptation of Tim Winton's book by the same name.

The movie was marketed as an incredible cinematic feat with 17 different directors doing an interpretation of the stories within the book.

For a long time I've whinged to my husband about how poorly movies depict a book. I've refused to see some movies when I've loved the book and fear a terrible interpretation. He scoffs at me. He's a movie lover.

Anyway, I had The Turning at home, as the book. Mr E decided to read the book before seeing the movie - 2 days before. So it was fresh in his mind (often books escape his memory cells as soon as he closes the cover).

Off we went to the movie. It was a 3 hour epic. And Mr E was digging out his phone looking at the time from the halfway point. He hated the film. He sat and wriggled and squirmed. He looked at his watch.

[image error] BookOne story was interpreted as a dance. To me, it was fascinating and beautiful. By far the most glorious of the stories. Mr E hated it. Loathed it. Couldn't understand how dance could possibly tell a story!

The movie ended. Mr E went striding out. I was only chuckling a little :) I looked at him. "What did you think?"


He huffed a bit. Scratched his head. Squirmed a little. Then said, "Was that the same book I read? I didn't remember their being any Aboriginal people in the book."

The film allowed for interpretation of the stories - which meant anyone could play the parts. There were stories with big name actors, and some with people I've never seen before. I guess each director made their own call on who they'd like to work with (I've no idea how it worked logistically and I don't want to know either!).

The book linked all the stories together. They were all in a small town. Tim Winton is gifted at that.

The movie made no such links. Not even the same state of Australia was used for the stories, let alone the same town. And the people had no link from one story to the next. In the book, one character may have a part in 3 stories, linking them. In the movie, the same character may have been Aboriginal in one story, white in another, Chinese in the next. You could not link them as the same person at all.

The key element to Tim Winton's novel was missing. And Mr E finally saw my complaint about movies not following books, and letting me down.

I think I should call it a victory.

Phallic Friday - exhibitionism

Exhibitionism is another aspect to sex that I find fascinating.

There are two meanings to this word (that I found anyway):
1. is the deliberate behaviour to attract attention
and
2. is the psychiatric condition which requires the exposure of your genitals in public.

I think with sex, there is more of the first meaning than the second, but I'm sure some of the second comes into play too.

In my wild youth, spent often in country pubs, there was a condition among the 'well hung' men to bare all when they were suitably drunk. It was only my observation, not a fact, that only well hung men did this... but I've rarely seen a smaller man give public displays of his anatomy. Have you?

So I think that some men, the well endowed kind, have a endless fascination in showing the world how much they have. Maybe this isn't a psychiatric condition, as such, but I think many times outdoor sex is initiated by the male, it's for this reason. He wants to show off his junk.

Some women have a burning desire to attract attention. And for me, they're the ones most likely to be involved in overly lusty public displays of affection. The ones who virtually start foreplay at the main bar, continue it into the beer garden and the deed is done in the carpark. Sometimes they make it home! (hope I'm not being too cynical)

Sometimes exhibitionism comes from encouraging fear - the fear of being caught. You have sex outdoors, or in a public place, or in a car in a carpark, for the fear factor. It gets your adrenalin running. It fires up the libido. Your partner gets a whole lot hotter when you're pulse is already racing.

And sometimes exhibitionism is just because you're a naturist. You like being nude. You like being outdoors without clothing. And you like having sex with freedom.

There are a lot of different aspects to exhibitionism....and I find it a fascinating topic. I'll have to write and think more about this.

Wildlife Wednesday - Pied Oystercatchers

Pied Oystercatchers on a WA beachPied Oystercatchers are busy little birds on the shore, always scurrying around looking for food.

They are found in coastal areas throughout Australian except for areas of unbroken sea cliffs such as the Great Australian Bight. Pied Oystercatchers have probably declined throughout much of their range and the current population may be as low as 10,000. Closely related forms are found in almost every continent in the world.

They feed on bivalve molluscs, which are prised apart with their specially adapted bills. Food is found by sight, or by probing their long, chisel-shaped bills in the mud/sand. Young Pied Oystercatchers are one of the few waders that are fed by their parents using this specialised feeding technique. Worms, crustaceans and insects are also eaten.

Nesting site on Seven Mile Beach, Oct 2013
They breed in pairs. A breeding territory of some 200 m is formed and is defended by both birds. On our beach here on south coast NSW, a fence is put up around their nesting site to keep people and their dogs away from the nests hoping the young will hatch and make it. In recent years, they haven't had much success with fox/dog attacks, high tides sweeping the nest away, or other disasters. This year, their nest is way above the tide line and I hope that might help them.

Pied Oystercatcher in flight. Seven Mile Beach, October 2013Nesting takes place on sand, shell grit or shingle just above high water mark on beaches, sandbars, margins of estuaries and lagoons. The eggs are well-camouflaged, being pale brown with darker brown and black blotches and streaks. Both sexes share parenting duties.

If you want some more information, Birds in Backyards has a little more, but was the source of some of this material.

Sunday Story - Natural Law

I've struggled to find me some good BDSM stories that hit me as real. There are a lot of good stories around but I don't often get grabbed by them. I can't exactly tell you why, but I have an "as if" thing happen. Something doesn't ring true in the characterisation, or the D/s relationship just doesn't hold me.

This book is not new. It's from 2004. But I missed it. Totally missed this author. Which is really remiss of me, I know.

Fortunately, a writing buddy tweeted about it being a freebie on Amazon and said it was one of her favs. So I downloaded it. It was free, if I hated it, I could can it without feeling compelled to get to the end.

But OMG. No canning happened. 4 am came and I was still deep into the story. (Can't tell you how non-comprehending Mr E is about these sorts of reading habits - I mean the 4 am ones, he didn;t know what I was reading!)

The hero is a cop, a successful undercover cop of many years, now a detective. He's strong, tough, protective, alpha ... but omg, he's a sub. And he fights it. He fights his submissive nature by topping from the bottom, until he meets the woman who calls him on it. And then the struggle begins.

I totally went with this. The hero struggles to be submissive. The heroine struggles to always be dominant. But their natures are so strong, they can't be happy shirking who they are.

It's a fantastic story - a whodunit - mixed in with the D/s investigation/explanation. It's so well done, I was caught up in the world. I loved it.

Might have to go on a Joey W Hill rampage :)

Phallic Friday - water and sex

Do you have a thing for water and sex? I don't mean anything too bizarre... just sex in the shower, the bath, the hot tub, at the beach, in the ocean? That sort of thing.

I think I do.

I wasn't completely conscious of it but it's coming out in my writing, and making me think more about it.

I remember a couple of conversations with others and I thought they were weird - now I think it's me.

One friend was saying how she kept reading books where people had sex against walls, even in the shower, as if that could happen in real life. I stopped and stared at her. "You've never had sex in the shower?" I asked. She laughed loudly at me and told me it only happened in books. And really, who was I to argue? I wasn't going to go into graphic detail of my sex life. Or show her what she was missing!

I have another friend who says she's tried sex in the shower and the bath and the pool and they're all big fails. Her fails are what excites me. We just laughed about that one. She said she'd try again...but I don't think her views will change.

My stories all seem to have wet sex. Pain Surfer is at the beach on the rocks, and I guess they don't exactly get wet, so maybe that's not counted. A Real Online Fantasy is at the beach on a river. Again, they don't actually do the deed in the water, so maybe that doesn't count either. But are you seeing a theme here? In The Virginity Mission there's a spa scene that gets pretty steamy even if she misses out on losing her virginity there, which is followed by a shower scene but that's a whole lot less steamy. In the one I'm writing now, there's a few steamy beach scenes that don't always get to completion but I did manage to finish one. And they shower together, but are water conscious, so no sex in the shower as such (I know, my stupid practical mind kicked in!).

I like the added stimulus of water. The sensation of movement, or of being held, or of suspension, or warmth, or drips splattering on you. I had an experience once where the hot water ran out on me in a steamy shower scene...that wasn't so much fun. I think in books you need the never-ending supply of hot water. In reality, that's not always available!

Here's a little excerpt from the book I'm writing now:

Complete exposure to the water is sensual. Water caresses my thighs, slides along my nether lips, slips against my heated core giving wet kisses to my hot clit. Nipples, scrunched tight, are soothed by the gentle wet whisper against them.
Languid from the lapping water, I only half notice Cooper toss his shorts towards the shore. It’s when his hands curve around my hips and he pulls me through the caressing sea to land against his naked strength, that I realise he’s starkers. His cock juts forward to meet me before bending against my thigh and snuggling into the natural groove between them. His hips cradle mine, his chest is the table for my breasts to fall upon. Our mouths meet, lock, explore. More moisture. The damp warmth of his lips is hot compared with the sea. The slow press of his tongue into my mouth reminiscent of the water’s press into my cunt.
We’re moving to the beat of the ocean, to the push and pull of the surf, to the ebb and flow. A slow sensuous dance.

So, do you have a thing for water? Or are you a reader who doesn't believe it possible to enjoy wet sex?

Wildlife Wednesday - Rock Wallabies

Spot the wallabiesOnce again on the Western Australian holiday, we stopped a night at Ellendale Pools, which was magnificent.

I was standing taking some photos of the pool, which was as still as glass, with these rocks behind it with the setting sun shining on them.

There was movement that caught my eye and I saw two rock wallabies, almost the same colour as the rocks, hopping across the rock face. Then they spied me and froze. If they weren't moving, I'm not sure I would have spotted these guys.

This is nature's camouflage at it's finest.

If you can't see them, draw an imaginary line across the middle of my photo. Just above the line, a little to the right of centre is the leading wallaby. The behind is about halfway between the left edge and the centre, and a smidgey bit higher.