Randy Alcorn's Blog, page 187

Are you longing for Heaven?

Are you desperately longing for Heaven? It’s a fair question. Abraham “was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God” (Hebrews 11:10). Abraham’s descendants “were longing for a better country—a heavenly one” (Hebrews 11:16). As Christ’s followers, “we do not have an enduring city, but we are looking for the city that is to come” (Hebrews 13:14). Peter says, “we are looking forward to the new heavens and new earth” (2 Peter 3:13).

But, in fact, are we? Are we actually looking forward to and longing for the world to come? This question is critical to our present lives.

For over twenty years, I’ve spent a lot of time contemplating Heaven. In my novels and most of my nonfiction, Heaven plays a major role. Researching my book Heaven, I read over 150 books on the subject, many of them long out-of-print. I’ve spoken on this subject often, taught two seminary courses on eternity, and received literally thousands of letters and emails about Heaven. There’s a great deal I don’t know, but one thing I do know is what Christians think about Heaven. And how seldom we think about it.  

What a contrast to the early Christians. Their pictures on the catacomb walls portrayed Heaven with beautiful landscapes, children playing, people feasting at banquets. God’s children throughout the ages had a source of strength and perspective largely alien to us: Heaven. It was their central reference point. It was the North Star by which they navigated their lives. But today, Heaven has fallen off our radar screens.

Who is responsible for our impoverished theology of Heaven? Satan, the father of lies (John 8:44). Some of his favorite deceptions are about Heaven (Revelation 13:6, NIV). He has systematically robbed us of a robust and accurate view of Heaven. And we’ve let him get away with it.

Our children’s imaginations are primed for Heaven, but they’re seldom presented with a compelling picture. So eventually they transfer their excitement and passion toward what they can see, hear, taste, smell and touch, here and now. Because we haven’t shown them the biblical picture of a resurrected humanity on a renovated earth, enjoying the pleasures of God’s presence, creation and culture as we serve King Jesus…they settle for the second-rate idols of a fallen world that’s a mere shadow of what it once was and one day will be. Their hearts are left empty. What they long for is one person, Jesus, and one place, Heaven. Nothing less can satisfy.

What God made us to desire, and therefore what we do desire, is exactly what He promises: a resurrected community life in resurrected bodies, with the resurrected Christ on a resurrected Earth. This is the eternal Heaven that awaits us. How can we think of it so rarely?

We’re slumbering. We need to wake up and smell the New Earth. Taste the coming resurrection. The doctrines of resurrection and New Earth mean that this present world, though suffering under sin and curse, is bursting with clues and foretastes of the world to come.

The Carpenter from Nazareth is preparing a place for us. He knows how to build. He’s constructed entire worlds, billions of them. He’s going to strip the damaged paint off the old Earth, refinish it, and present it magnificent and pristine. He says it will one day be our home . . . and His, for He will dwell there with His people, bringing Heaven to Earth (Revelation 21:3).

So wake up. Imagine this world in its original condition. The happy dog with the wagging tail, not the snarling beast, beaten and limping and starved. The flowers unwilted, the grass undying, the blue sky without pollution. People smiling and joyful, not angry, depressed, and empty. The Curse will be reversed: this is the promise of God (Revelation 22:3). Take it to the bank.

With the Lord we love and with the friends we cherish, believers will embark together on the ultimate adventure, in a spectacular new universe awaiting our exploration and dominion. Jesus will be the cosmic center. Joy will be the air we breathe.

And right when we think “it doesn’t get any better than this”—it will.

So rise up from slumber. Set your mind and heart on a Heaven as exciting as its God. Then feel your heart flutter and watch your perspective change.

You’ll never regret that world you’ll wake up to…not in a billion years.

         

Related Resources

Video: All Will Be Made Right
Blog: Where God's People Go When They Die
DVD Class: Eternity 101

Photo credit: somadjinn via rgbstock.com

Is there a correlation between mental health and spiritual attack?

In this video interview with EPM staff member Julia Stager, we discuss the question: There’s a lot of talk about mental health. How do you see mental health as being related to spiritual attack?

Randy: Mental health was around before people started looking into psychology and there was even such a word. In the Bible, you find people who are mentally healthy and unhealthy. A huge part of our unhealthiness is due to sin and the fact that we are sinners, though not all mental health issues are sinful.

There’s a time when the brain may be malfunctioning, and there may be medications that can help the person. Our mind and our brain are not the same thing, but they overlap. There’s the physical brain, and then we have this spiritual, immaterial thing that is called a mind. We need to do what we can to see that, as Scripture says, our minds are in conformity to Christ: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Romans 12:2).

Julia: It makes me think of how Jesus addresses our heart, our soul, our minds, and our bodies. It’s important to look at a person as a whole unit, and not just simply address a problem as spiritual. Because if the problem is spiritual, it’s also affecting the rest of that person as well.

Randy: That’s right. And there’s also the aspect of spiritual attack you were asking about. That can be a demonic or satanic attack upon a person. Certainly the evil one and demons can prompt us to think in certain ways. Scripture talks about the influence of the world, the flesh and the devil.

Our society and culture influences us to think in very unhealthy ways about beauty, attractiveness, sex and money. There’s a lot of wrong ways of looking at life that we inherit from our culture. So we’ve got to get back to God’s Word, assemble with God’s people, get wise counsel, and address these issues of mental health in our lives and the lives of our families.

         

Related Resources

Article: How should a Christian respond to mental illness?

Image credit: oranje88 via sxc.hu

Will we drink coffee on the New Earth?

Both Nanci and I love a good cup of coffee. Actually, I like about three good cups of dark, strong coffee—preferably French Roast, with milk. I'm like one of my fictional characters, homicide detective Ollie Chandler, who drank enough coffee that Juan Valdez named his donkey after him.

Earlier this year when I wrote the new intro to our book Help for Women Under Stress, I had to confess that though I have lived well by the exercise chapter in the book these past 27 years, I have not been so strict with the nutrition chapter, particularly in reference to the warnings against too much coffee!

And yes, a question I’ve been asked is “Will there be coffee in Heaven?” I’ll address it in this blog not simply for the benefit of coffee lovers but because it’s a revealing test of whether we’re more influenced by biblical teaching or Christoplatonism. Someone may say, “I sure hope there’ll be coffee in heaven.” But it’s a statement that few would attempt to defend biblically.

But consider the facts. God made coffee. Coffee grows on Earth, which God made for mankind, put under our management, and filled with resources for our use. When God evaluated his creation, he deemed coffee trees, along with all else, to be “very good.” Many people throughout history have enjoyed coffee—even in a fallen world where neither coffee nor our taste buds are at their best.

God tells us that he “richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment” (1 Timothy 6:17). Does “everything” include coffee? Paul also says, “For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer” (1 Timothy 4:4-5). Again, does “everything” include coffee?

Given these biblical perspectives—and realizing that caffeine addiction or anything else that’s unhealthy simply won’t exist on the New Earth—can you think of any persuasive reason why coffee trees and coffee drinking wouldn’t be part of the resurrected Earth?

Will the New Earth have fewer resources for human enjoyment than Eden did or than the world under the Curse offers? If you’re tempted to say, “But in Heaven our minds will be on spiritual things, not coffee,” your Christoplatonism detector should go off. It’s fine if you don’t like coffee, but to suggest that coffee is inherently unspiritual is . . . well, heresy. It directly contradicts the Scriptures just cited. God made the physical and spiritual realms not to oppose each other but to be united in bringing glory to him.

On the New Earth, we will “drink . . . from the spring of the water of life” (Revelation 21:6). God will prepare for us “a banquet of aged wine . . . the finest of wines” (Isaiah 25:6). Not only will we drink water and wine, we’ll eat from fruit trees (Revelation 22:2), and there’s every reason to believe we’ll drink juice made from the twelve fruits from the tree of life. So, along with drinking water, wine, and fruit juice, is there any reason to suppose we wouldn’t drink coffee or tea? Can you imagine drinking coffee or tea with Jesus on the New Earth? If you can’t, why not?

If for health reasons you shouldn’t drink coffee now, then don’t. But aside from personal preference, the only compelling reason for not having coffee in Heaven would be if coffee were sinful or harmful. But it won’t be. If drinking coffee would be unspiritual on the New Earth, then it must be unspiritual now. And unless someone’s a caffeine addict, under bondage to coffee and not to Christ, or if a person’s health is at stake, there’s simply no biblical basis for believing drinking coffee is sinful. Those who shouldn’t consume alcohol or caffeine now will be freed from addiction on the New Earth. Adverse health effects simply won’t exist.

Those who for reasons of allergies, weight problems, or addictions can’t regularly consume peanuts, chocolate, coffee, and wine—and countless other foods and drinks—may look forward to enjoying them on the New Earth. To be free from sin, death, and bondage on the New Earth will mean that we’ll enjoy more pleasures, not fewer. And the God who delights in our pleasures will be glorified in our grateful praise.

         

Related Resources

Book: Heaven
Video: Heaven and Christoplatonism
Blog: The Problem with Christoplatonism

Stock photo credit: johnnyberg via rgbstock.com

What is your opinion of prolife organizations that show graphic pictures of aborted babies?

You can also listen to the audio of this blog.

One of the things people from the Center for Bioethical Reform (CBR) do is drive around with trucks showing graphic pictures that include aborted babies. This is not my way of doing it, but I’m fine with that. I think we need to be careful not to criticize other people. It’s like when D. L. Moody was criticized for his evangelism crusades, he said, “Well, I like the way I do evangelism better than the way you don’t do it.”

And in the prolife arena, I kind of like the way anybody does it, better than the way most don’t do it. Years ago Greg Cunningham, the director of CBR, showed videos called “The Hard Truth,” and “The Harder Truth.” Basically they included actual photos of aborted babies and some live footage, as well as video of an actual live abortion that was filmed.

But before he presented this, he would warn people by saying, “There’s going to be disturbing images and all you have to do is close your eyes. There’s going to be music without narration for this part, so you don’t have to close your eyes and plug your ears.”

But he says it in such a way as to say, “If you’re unwilling to look at the reality of what an abortion is, if you would find this disturbing (and trust me, you will find it disturbing), and you don’t want to look, you need to look.”

Now this does some things which I think are vital. For one, it does bring some people to look who would have turned away, and they no longer can be angry at you (certainly not as angry) because you have warned them. You’ve told them, “You don’t need to watch this.” Now if anyone comes up afterwards and says, “I can’t believe you showed this!” He can say, “Did you not hear what I said? I totally warned you. You didn’t even have to leave the room; all you had to do was look down. You didn’t even have to close your eyes, just don’t look at the screen.”

Now I realize in a documentary, it doesn’t work quite that way. You’re not popping in a DVD. But nonetheless, the narrator could say, “For the next [fill in the blank] seconds, there’s going to be graphic images that portray what an abortion is. You do not have to look at this. Do not look at it unless it is your choice. But if you look away, ask yourself, ‘Why am I looking away?’ It might be that you know that children are being killed by abortion and you’re very aware of this, just as you’re very aware that Jewish people were killed in the Holocaust.” (Or maybe you’ve seen enough of it in the past that you believe it and know it to be true, and this is not going to help move you to further commitment or action on this or whatever.)

To be honest, I sometimes look away now, because I don’t need any more convincing. I know for sure that this is the killing of the unborn. But even as I say that, it’s healthy for me sometimes to look because it is good to be disturbed again.

Many years ago when I wrote a book on civil disobedience called Is Rescuing Right?, I reviewed the history of some pictures taken of the Holocaust that were smuggled out of Germany. They were turned over to The New York Times. Well, The New York Times finally decided that despite how disturbing these images were, to go ahead and print them. That had a huge influence on the attitude of the average American on whether or not it was right to get involved in this war. Once you saw these pictures, you knew how horrible it was.

But the remarkable thing is this—as a whole, nobody stood up and criticized The New York Times. People did not say, “How dare you show us these horrible pictures!” Because the truth is, it’s not the pictures that are horrible. What is horrible is what is in the pictures. This is a critical distinction. I think in a documentary, you’ve got every right and opportunity to say that this is just film. There is nothing good or bad about film—that’s all it is.  There’s no evil picture or video. It’s what’s in the video that can be evil.

So if you see evil—like the killing of unborn children—then by all means, recognize it to be evil, but don’t get mad at the people who took the pictures and are showing you the pictures. Get mad at the people who are doing the evil that is in the pictures.

         

Related Resources

Book: Why ProLife?
Article: Are graphic pictures effective in the abortion debate?
Blog: The Evidence Doesn't Lie - the Unborn Are Children

Photo credit: Center for Bio-Ethical Reform | Graphic credit: Abort73

Seven Perspectives on Prayer

1. Prayer isn’t passive, it’s active. It’s really doing something. Prayer isn’t the least we can do, it’s the most.

2. Prayer is supernatural. It’s reaching out of the visible world into the unseen world, and tapping into powers beyond this dimension. (Prayer picks fights with demons—and empowers righteous angels to win those fights.)

“Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Eph. 6:12).

3. Prayer is never secondary, it’s always primary. It’s not the last recourse, when options run out; it’s the first and best recourse. Prayer is the central work which causes all other work to bear fruit. (No prayer, no power.)

“Therefore put on the whole armor of God...take the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. Pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the gospel...Pray that I may declare it fearlessly” (Eph. 6:13, 17-20).

4. God’s greatest works, accomplished through prayer, are often invisible to us for now. (What’s visible to us, except in rare moments of clarity, are not God’s greatest works.)

5. We pray now in faith, believing our prayers are making an eternal difference; we anticipate Heaven, where we’ll learn God’s breath-taking answers to our prayers, including many that seemed unheard and ignored.

6. There is no greater ministry, no higher calling, no better investment than prayer. (It’s not just right, it’s smart.)

7. Prayer is trusting God that He can accomplish more when I’m on my knees than I can accomplish on my feet.

         

Related Resources

Book: Seeing the Unseen
Article: Perspective on Prayer from Daniel 9-10
Blog: What to Pray for, Beyond Physical Healing

The Two Essentials: Grace and Truth

The only “church growth formula” the early church pos­sessed was the body of truth flowing with the blood of grace. They drew thousands to Jesus by being like Jesus.

But what does it mean to “be like Jesus”? We could come up with long lists of His character qualities. But the longer the list, the less we can wrap our minds around it. (I can’t even juggle three balls. How could I juggle dozens?)

But what if the character of Christ was reducible to two ingredients?

In fact, it is:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.... The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. (John 1:1, 14, emphasis added)

Jesus is full of two things: grace and truth.

Not “full of patience, wisdom, beauty, compassion, and creativity.” In the list there are no commas and only one conjunction—grace and truth. Scripture distills Christ’s attributes into a two-point checklist of Christlikeness.

The baby born in a Bethlehem barn was Creator of the universe. He pitched His tent on the humble camping ground of our little planet. God’s glory no longer dwelt in a temple of wood and stone, but in Christ. He was the Holy of Holies.

But when He ascended back into the wide blue heavens, He left God’s shekinah glory—that visible manifestation of God’s presence—on earth. We Christians became His living temples, the new Holy of Holies (1 Corinthians 3:16–17; 6:19).

People had only to look at Jesus to see what God is like. People today should only have to look at us to see what Jesus is like. For better or worse, they’ll draw conclusions about Christ from what they see in us. If we fail the grace test, we fail to be Christlike. If we fail the truth test, we fail to be Christlike. If we pass both tests, we’re like Jesus.

A grace-starved, truth-starved world needs Jesus, full of grace and truth.

So what does this hungry world see when it looks at us?

         

Related Resources

Book: The Grace and Truth Paradox
Audio message: Jesus: Full of Grace and Truth
Blog: Better Than I Deserve

From Eternal Perspective Ministries

The Grace and Truth Paradox is on sale in the EPM store for $6 (retail $10.99) until Friday, October 25, 11:59 pm PT.

If we minimize grace the world sees no hope for salvation. If we minimize truth, the world sees no need for salvation. To show the world Jesus, we must offer full-orbed, unabridged truth and grace, magnifying both, never downsizing or apologizing for either.

photo credit: stuant63 via photopin cc

How do we stay pure in today’s world?

In this video interview with EPM staff member Julia Stager, we discuss the question: How do we stay pure in today’s world? When someone simply gets out of bed in the morning, temptation is all around.

Randy: I certainly agree that there is a lot of temptation in the world. If that means from the time that you get out of bed you have thoughts in your mind, I get that.

One of the things I would say is that we do have control over the environment in which we live. And I’ve actually seen people who want help in the area of sexual purity but have posters on their walls that promote sexual impurity. We need to think in terms of what choices we are making that are exposing us to sexual impurity. I can’t just magically snap my fingers and expect that I’m not going to face sexual temptation. Scripture says, “Flee from sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18).

Julia: Temptation is a complicated thing, in that certain temptations build and build and get stronger until we flee from that situation. But there are other temptations where we build up a resistance to them, and they become less and less of a temptation over time because it’s no longer a part of our lifestyle.

Randy: I agree. I remember years ago—many years ago—there was a certain store in Gresham (where we live). There was a particular magazine rack in that store, and when I went in inevitably it would seem like my eyes were wandering over there and I was seeing things I shouldn’t. Finally I just said, “Okay, Lord. I’m not going to go in that door. I’m staying away from that area of the store.”

Some people would say, “Well, wait a minute! That’s just pathetic that you can’t even walk in the door. Come on. Just keep your eyes away.” But I was struggling with it.

So I trained myself not to go in that door. Then years later, although the magazines were still there, one day I found myself in a hurry and I quickly went in the door. The interesting thing was, because I had disciplined myself by not giving myself access to that, I had now gotten to the point where I was able to keep my eyes away. And now it was no problem.

But the point is, don’t overestimate your ability to resist temptation. If you are falling in an area, stay away from that area.

         

Related Resources

Blog: Sexual Purity - 16 Things You Need to Know
Book: The Purity Principle
Article: Protecting Purity in a Technological Corinth

Stock photo credit: arinas74 via sxc.hu

Where God’s People Go When They Die

Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. — 1 Thessalonians 4:13

When Marco Polo returned to Italy from the court of Kublai Khan, he described a world his audience had never seen—one that could be understood only through the eyes of imagination. Not that China was an imaginary realm, but it was very different from Italy. Yet, as two locations on planet Earth inhabited by human beings, they had much in common. The reference points of Italy allowed a basis for understanding China, and the differences could be spelled out from there.

The writers of Scripture present Heaven in many ways; for instance, as a garden, a city, a country, and a kingdom. We’re familiar with gardens, cities, countries, and kingdoms; they serve as mental bridges to help us understand Heaven.

Usually when we refer to Heaven, we mean the place where Christians go when they die. When we tell our children, “Grandma’s now in Heaven,” we’re referring to the intermediate, or present, Heaven. The term intermediate doesn’t mean it is halfway between Heaven and Hell, in some kind of purgatory or second-rate place. The intermediate Heaven is fully Heaven, fully in God’s presence, but it is intermediate in the sense that it’s temporary, not our final destination. Though it is a wonderful place, and we’ll love it there, it is not the place we are ultimately made for, and it is not the place where we will live forever. God has destined his children to live as resurrected beings on a resurrected Earth.

So, as wonderful as the intermediate Heaven is, we must not lose sight of our true destination, the New Earth, which will also be in God’s presence (because that’s what Heaven is, the central place of God’s dwelling).

Will Christians live in Heaven forever? The answer depends on what we mean by Heaven. Will we be with the Lord forever? Absolutely. Will we always be with him in exactly the same place that Heaven is now? No.

In the present Heaven, everyone is in Christ’s presence, and everyone is joyful. But everyone is also looking forward to Christ’s return to Earth, when they will experience their resurrection and walk on the earth again.

It may seem strange to say that the Heaven we go to at death isn’t eternal, but it’s true. Let me suggest an analogy to illustrate the difference between the intermediate Heaven and the eternal Heaven. Suppose you live in a homeless shelter in Miami. One day you inherit a beautiful house in Santa Barbara, California, fully furnished, on a gorgeous hillside overlooking the ocean. With the home comes a wonderful job doing something you’ve always wanted to do. Not only that, but you’ll also be near close family members who moved from Miami many years ago.

On your flight to Santa Barbara, you’ll change planes in Denver, where you’ll spend an afternoon. Some other family members, whom you haven’t seen in years, will meet you at the Denver airport and board the plane with you to Santa Barbara, where they have inherited their own beautiful houses on another part of the same vast estate. Naturally, you look forward to seeing them. Now, when the Miami ticket agent asks you, “Where are you headed?” would you say, “Denver”? No. You would say, “Santa Barbara,” because that’s your final destination. If you mentioned Denver at all, you would say, “I’m going to Santa Barbara by way of Denver.”

When you talk to your friends in Miami about where you’re going to live, would you focus on Denver? No. You might not even mention Denver, even though you will be a Denver-dweller for several hours. Even if you left the airport and spent a day or a week in Denver, it still wouldn’t be your focus. Denver is just a stop along the way. Your true destination—your new long-term home—is in Santa Barbara.

Similarly, the Heaven we will go to when we die, the intermediate Heaven, is a temporary dwelling place. It’s a wonderfully nice place (much better than the Denver airport!), but it’s still a stop along the way to our final destination: the New Earth. It will be great to see friends and family in the present Heaven whom we haven’t seen for a while. But like us, they will be looking forward to the resurrection, after which we will actually live on the estate that God is preparing for us.

Another analogy is more precise but also more difficult to envision, because for most of us it’s outside our experience. Imagine leaving the homeless shelter in Miami and flying to the intermediate location, Denver, and then turning around and going back to your city of origin, which has been completely renovated—a New Miami. In this New Miami, you would no longer live in a homeless shelter but in a beautiful house in a glorious pollution-free, crime-free, sin-free city. So you would end up living not in a new home but in a radically improved version of your old home.

This is what the Bible promises us—we will live with Christ and one another forever, not in the present Heaven, but on the New Earth, which God will make into Heaven by virtue of the location of his throne and his presence, and where he will forever be at home with his people.

         

Related Resources

Blog: Spend Your Day with Eternity in Mind
Book: 50 Days of Heaven
Video: What is life like in the present Heaven?

Airplane wing photo credit: vimark via sxc.hu

Control, Coping, and Preparing for Holiday Stress

Stress studies show that a sense of control is essential to mental health. Those who survive captivity with the fewest mental scars are those who maintain as much control as possible even when so much is out of their control. They may treat their cell as a home, rearrange the “furniture,” save food and share it with others, write notes to themselves, make plans for their days, order their lives in simple ways. Prisoners who lose their sense of control lose their purpose, their self-respect, and eventually their minds.

Most of us are not prisoners, but all of us, for better or for worse, face the holidays year after year. From mid-November to early January, our lives change, bringing many things that are delightful, but which increase our pressure and fatigue. For many, the holidays seem out of control, the chaos inevitable.

But in fact much of both the financial stress and the time crunch can be avoided with planning. Buy Christmas presents in advance (when they’re on sale); plan the dinner now, buy the food early (again, watch for sales) and freeze it; say “no” to extra engagements around Christmas; buy next year’s cards the day after Christmas (best sale day of the year) and begin writing them in October (do wait until December to mail them). Nanci and I don’t send Christmas cards, we send Thanksgiving cards. It’s more special then, and we don’t have to add it to December’s responsibilities.

To avoid the Christmas chaos of children opening ten presents in one night, spread out the presents the week before Christmas, letting them open one a day. Or simplify by making a few gifts for each other. Set aside time to read the Christmas story unrushed.

This is just a beginning. You can make dozens of changes. You cannot eliminate all holiday stress of course, but you can certainly minimize it. And if you don’t, remember, it’s not because you couldn’t but because you didn’t. It’s your choice.

For years I lived under the tyranny of the telephone. I treated the ringing of the phone as a divine mandate, and I missed too many dinners and bedtime prayers with my daughters because of that phone—no, actually because of my choice to answer the phone.

Finally I discovered something that changed my life: phone calls are seldom from Mt. Sinai. There are few true emergencies and it won’t hurt people to wait an hour or a day for me to call. When my daughters were growing up there weren’t cell phones, and one of the best things about going out for the evening as a family was that nobody could reach us! We can do the same thing now—but it requires silencing the phone. You don’t have to see who’s calling, texting, tweeting, Facebooking, or…fill in the blank. In fact, if you do, you’re saying they are more important than the people you are with. “Wherever you are, be there.”

Nanci and I learned thirty years ago that the phone is our servant, not our master. By God’s grace that lesson stuck. Sure, we still get calls during dinner. We just don’t answer them! And we are guilt-free, because we know it’s what God wants. (The messages come in, and if it’s important we’ll pick up. But guess what—it’s almost never important enough to interrupt dinner!) Looking back, I’m amazed and embarrassed that until I was thirty I let that piece of technology disrupt me and my family. All because I didn’t take control. Thank you, Lord, for waking me up when you did!

Perhaps Christmas and the telephone aren’t a problem for you, but you worry about losing your job or you’re concerned about a friend who is facing a divorce. List several circumstances or situations in your life that trigger a stress response. Put them in one of the following categories: uncontrollable, controllable, and partly controllable.

After you identify the sources of stress and determine which ones you can control—even partially—jot down specifically what you can do about them. Make your plan, schedule the time to do it, then follow through and implement the necessary changes.

While there is much we can’t control, we can always follow God’s formula for dealing with stress by praying. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God” (Philippians 4:6, ESV). Sometimes we desperately want to take control when we cannot. But we know and trust the One who is in control and that’s where we rest.

         

Note from Eternal Perspective Ministries

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What encouragement do you have for fathers?

In this video interview with Julia Stager, EPM staff member, she asks, “What encouragement do you have for fathers?”

Randy: It’s a huge job, and fathers need encouragement. One of the things I think about is what Scripture says in 1 Thessalonians 2:12. Paul says when he was with the Thessalonians, he was encouraging them, comforting them, and urging them to live a life worthy of the Lord. When it comes to being a father, we tend to skip right to the urging: “Make our children be obedient. Make sure they are good. Make sure they do the right things.” You know, telling them what to do.

I think Paul gives a good model when he talks about first encouraging and comforting children. Because when you are there to encourage and comfort your children, then you’ve got a relational basis for when the time comes that you have to urge them to behave the right way.

Does that make sense?

Julia: Absolutely! I think the father/son or father/daughter relationship is so important to the child. First establishing that foundational relationship is going to make the truth you speak into their lives much better received.

Randy: Yes. We have to come to our children with grace and with truth. That’s a huge job for fathers. But the thing I would say to encourage fathers in this process of parenting is that God is a father. God totally understands what it means to be a dad and that sometimes children will rebel. He understands that you are first His child and only second are you a father.

So learn, as a child of God, what you love and enjoy about your Father in Heaven. Then seek to be that kind of father to your children.

         

Related Resources

Blog: What is a father's primary responsibility?
Book: Courageous
Article: The Indispensible Father

Image credit: hortongrou via sxc.hu