Randy Alcorn's Blog, page 161

How Does the Bible Present Marriage?

Last month, Nanci and I celebrated 40 years of marriage. I love Nanci more than ever and I thank God for her as a best friend and soul-mate. Earthly marriage is a gift from God. It’s also a shadow, a copy, an echo of the true and ultimate marriage between Christ and His bride.

In her latest video, Julia Stager shares some great thoughts on how the Bible presents marriage, from beginning to end. (Congratulations to Ryan and Julia, who will be getting married this September!)

 

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The Modern Man���s Cycles of Laziness

The Peter Pan Syndrome: Men Who Never Grow Up—a book published in 1983—coined the term now used of immature adults, men especially. Sometimes it’s a thirty-year-old man who won’t stop playing video games to read to his children. Or a forty year old who can’t talk to his teenage son about drugs because it would distract him from the playoffs. Or the guy who won’t go to church with his family because he stayed up too late watching TV.

Scripture has much to say about the immaturity that results specifically in laziness. “If a man is lazy,” says Ecclesiastes, “the rafters sag; if his hands are idle, the house leaks” (10:18). Proverbs 20:4 says, “A sluggard does not plow in season; so at harvest time he looks but finds nothing.”

But God intends men to grow up, accept responsibilities, and mature spiritually. Once we understand the problems of immaturity and laziness, both in our own lives and our families, we can better address them.  I appreciated this article by Paul Maxwell that explores five vicious cycles which perpetuate male inactivity:

The Complicated Life of Lazy Boys

The modern man has a major branding crisis. Most sum him up in one word: lazy. There are different ways to pronounce the word — dependent, wasteful, inept, ungrateful, complacent, unworthy, unimpressive, undisciplined — all with one root: the failure to do. Avoid work, and aim for the bare minimum.

Cycles of laziness eventually turn into cycles of violence. As our muscle for self-denial in work atrophies through inactivity, our ability to deny ourselves in relationships weakens as well. The seed of abusive inclinations is embedded in the selfishness of our laziness. A man who dishonors himself will eventually dishonor others (Proverbs 18:9).

Male laziness, though, is both misunderstood and underestimated by most. Until we understand laziness, we will never be able to work well. We have tried yelling at and mocking men, and that has not worked often or for long. Instead, let’s look at the complexity of laziness to see the deeper business underneath it and how the gospel heals and empowers lazy men.

Read the rest at Desiring God.

 

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Thoughtful Questions for Us All to Consider about Gay Marriage

I encourage you to read through this great post by Kevin DeYoung, then consider sharing it. I also highly recommend Kevin's recent excellent book What Does the Bible Really Teach about Homosexuality?

40 Questions for Christians Now Waving Rainbow Flags

For evangelicals who lament last Friday’s Supreme Court decision, it’s been a hard few days. We aren’t asking for emotional pity, nor do I suspect many people are eager to give us any. Our pain is not sacred. Making legal and theological decisions based on what makes people feel better is part of what got us into this mess in the first place. Nevertheless, it still hurts.

There are many reasons for our lamentation, from fear that religious liberties will be taken away to worries about social ostracism and cultural marginalization. But of all the things that grieve us, perhaps what’s been most difficult is seeing some of our friends, some of our family members, and some of the folks we’ve sat next to in church giving their hearty “Amen” to a practice we still think is a sin and a decision we think is bad for our country. It’s one thing for the whole nation to throw a party we can’t in good conscience attend. It’s quite another to look around for friendly faces to remind us we’re not alone and then find that they are out there jamming on the dance floor. We thought the rainbow was God’s sign (Gen. 9:8-17).

If you consider yourself a Bible-believing Christian, a follower of Jesus whose chief aim is to glorify God and enjoy him forever, there are important questions I hope you will consider before picking up your flag and cheering on the sexual revolution. These questions aren’t meant to be snarky or merely rhetorical. They are sincere, if pointed, questions that I hope will cause my brothers and sisters with the new rainbow themed avatars to slow down and think about the flag you’re flying.

Read the rest.

Help My Unbelief, a new book by Barnabas Piper

Barnabas Piper's Help My Unbelief, an honest, self-revealing and engaging treatment of an important subject, was just released today, July 1. This winsome and well-reasoned book avoids clichés and easy, superficial answers. It will benefit many—including those who doubt, those who "sort of" believe, and those who believe, yet long to do so more completely.

Here’s more about the book:

God is infinite, beyond our understanding—yet He chooses to reveal Himself in ways that spark questions rather than settling them all.

Instead of making Himself smaller, God invites us into a larger faith. One that has room for questions, victories, failures, and mystery. Because belief in an infinite God by finite humans is an act of exploration … a process of learning—and then embracing—what we can’t learn but can trust.

Discover the God who not only desires our belief but actually welcomes our curiosity.

Barnabas writes, “What the Bible reveals of God is precisely what God wanted revealed of Himself, no more and no less. But it isn’t everything about Him. Scripture raises as many questions as it answers. …God did not want us to have easy instructions and simple answers. He didn’t want us to be able to understand Him so well that we could package Him, wrap Him up, and put a bow on Him.”

This is a great reminder that God has revealed just enough of Himself to give us reasons for faith, but not enough to make faith unnecessary.

In Eden, God could have explained more to Adam and Eve. Certainly He could have enlightened Abraham more. But if God made Himself so readily apparent in everyday life that we couldn’t doubt Him, it would change the nature of faith. We’d lack a vital element of character-building. God’s daily intervention and appearance would overpower us. We would have to believe in Him and thus faith would become impossible.

Paul Tournier said, “Where there is no longer any opportunity for doubt, there is no longer any opportunity for faith.”

God must give us room, not crowd in on us and micromanage us. Distance is necessary for faith to develop. If we can’t help but be aware of Him, there wouldn’t be any spiritual growth.

God doesn’t force Himself on us. He invites us to take the initiative with Him: “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you” (James 4:8, ESV).

Frederick Buechner wrote, “Without somehow destroying me in the process, how could God reveal himself in a way that would leave no room for doubt? If there were no room for doubt, there would be no room for me.”

Here We Stand: An Evangelical Declaration on Marriage

Three days ago, the Supreme Court handed down a landmark 5-4 decision in favor of what is called “gay marriage.” As followers of Christ, how should we respond?

I like what author and pastor Thabiti Anyabwile writes:

The recent ruling of SCOTUS has tremendous social and legal implications for all citizens of the country. But the ruling does not in any way change the Christian understanding of marriage or the biblical understanding of sexual morality. The ruling will sharpen and clarify the difference between the church and the world, and sometimes it will do that between true churches and false churches following the course of the world. This is a sad development to the extent that it hardens people in their sin. This is ultimately a good development to the extent it purifies and strengthens the church. But nothing fundamental has changed for those who love their Bibles and obey their Lord in the most intimate of matters.

I also deeply appreciate John Piper's insights, and encourage you to read them.

Last week I was asked to sign a declaration concerning marriage by a coalition of evangelical leaders. I was glad to sign it. I think it’s an example of the right tone we need to strive for in our interactions:

As evangelical Christians, we dissent from the court’s ruling that redefines marriage. The state did not create the family, and should not try to recreate the family in its own image. We will not capitulate on marriage because biblical authority requires that we cannot. The outcome of the Supreme Court’s ruling to redefine marriage represents what seems like the result of a half-century of witnessing marriage’s decline through divorce, cohabitation, and a worldview of almost limitless sexual freedom. The Supreme Court’s actions pose incalculable risks to an already volatile social fabric by alienating those whose beliefs about marriage are motivated by deep biblical convictions and concern for the common good.

I hope you’ll read through the rest of “Here We Stand.” I think you’ll see that it isn’t just another angry reaction, but expresses love for people regardless of their sexual orientation and practices.

Sadly, some professing Christians are taking great delight in this decision, and believe that the loving thing to do is to celebrate it. What they’re missing is that God is the one who determines right and wrong, and we have no say in that. What God says is sin—my sin, your sin, anyone’s sin—is never in the best interests of any of us, whether heterosexuals or homosexuals. People are free to make their choices, and we should love them and share the gospel with them, but we should graciously take issue with beliefs and practices God takes issue with. This isn’t being judgmental; it is seeking to honor God and act in love.  

We are all sinners, and the good news is that by God’s grace all sins—whether hypocrisy, gluttony, hatred, pride or sexual sins—can be confessed, repented of and forgiven. The way to love people is never to celebrate our sin or theirs, our temptations or theirs, but to come in humility as a fellow sinner and point to the One who paid for all our sins on the cross, and offers forgiveness.

“Happy is the person whose sins are forgiven, whose wrongs are pardoned” (Psalm 32:1, New Century Version).

I’m honestly amazed by how many people seemed surprised by the Court’s decision, in that we’ve clearly been headed this direction for decades. Christ-followers have gotten used to having it easy in the United States—we haven’t been in the power position for a long time, regardless of claims to the contrary (you would think that legalized child-killing for over forty years would have tipped us off to this).

We are just beginning to experience the hostility and social alienation our brothers and sisters in many countries have long experienced. It’s nothing to whine about—it’s just an opportunity to think and speak with the grace and truth of Jesus, who is the Judge to whom all of us fallen and finite people, including the so-called Supreme Court, will answer.  

When we believe and teach the Bible, it’s guaranteed you and I will be seen as bigots. Unless, of course, we either outright deny the Scriptures or are so quiet about our beliefs that no one finds us out. (Imagine an ambassador who lives in fear of divulging his King’s policies.)

Will churches one day lose their tax exempt status and be pulled into court for violations of various laws, old and new ones? I would think so. If it comes to that, let’s be faithful. I’m all in favor of holding onto our civil rights as long as possible, but I just think the ship of a large and growing number of this country’s citizens being hostile to biblical values sailed long ago.

Of course we will be mocked and despised by some. Jesus said, “In the world you will have tribulation” (John 16:33). Paul said, “All who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted” (2 Timothy 3:12). Jesus set the example when He endured far worse than most of us will: “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23). The triune God is the true Supreme Court, and Jesus was and is a member of it.

We need to ask ourselves whether we are living for the culture’s approval or for God’s approval. By all means, let's reach out to all people with love and grace. But realize that in the end other people’s opinions of us won’t matter. Our opinion of ourselves won’t matter. God’s opinion alone will matter, and His “opinion” is truth. He is our Creator, Judge and Savior, and He is the One we should seek to please above all.

This is not a time for hatred nor for cowardice, not for hostility nor for celebration. It’s a time to be like Jesus: “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14).

Not truth without grace. Not grace without truth. The Gospel of Jesus offers forgiveness, redemption and hope for all. Let’s live it out and offer it in the spirit of Jesus, full of both grace and truth.

Randy Alcorn

 

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Miscarriage: Finding Hope, Longing for Reunion

Last year when I shared a blog about miscarriage, the response from those who could identify with what the author shared was overwhelming. As I said then, I strongly believe that those going through the loss of a child by miscarriage need to be told it’s okay to grieve, knowing they’ve been parted from their real child in a heartbreaking way.

Someone recently shared this extraordinary blog with me, which includes pictures of a precious 14-week-old baby and a story of heartache and hope in Christ:

I had a baby last Tuesday. 
There was no pushing. 
No pain. 
No first cry.
I had a baby last Tuesday, 174 days too early. 

Read the rest.

For most of us, the list of people we’re longing for reunion with is lengthy. But those who have lost a child, either before or after birth, have one more compelling reason to long for Heaven. Peter tells us, “You will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 1:11).

God is the main one who will welcome us, no doubt, but I think there will be a welcoming committee with Him. All our eyes will be on Jesus, the Cosmic Center, the Source of all Happiness, but then we’ll meet person after person who has gone before us, those who touched our lives and those whose lives we’ve touched. Glorious reunions, and amazing introductions, conversations and story-telling at banquet tables, jaws dropping and laughter long and hard, the laughter of Jesus being the most contagious. Children and grandchildren lost in miscarriages will not remain lost to God’s people—we will find them and be joined with them in the presence of Jesus.

Once reunited with these precious children, we’ll never be parted again. And in the resurrection, on the New Earth, I wonder if God may allow those children taken so young to grow up with their parents and grandparents, in a world of endless wonder and adventure, yet complete safety. Imagine what it would be like to unite with these children in a land with “no more curse” (Revelation 22:3), no disease, accidents or crime. And where we’re told “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’” (Revelation 21:4-5) 

I have no direct biblical grounds for what I’m envisioning, but I am convinced it would be just like God to grant such a wonderful gift to His children who were parted from their children in this life.

“Happy are people who grieve, because they will be made glad” (Matthew 5:4, Common English Bible).

In the wake of the Charleston shooting: How could a good God allow suffering and evil?

Last weekend I spoke at my home church, Good Shepherd Community Church in Boring (yes, Boring) Oregon, on the question of why a good God allows evil and suffering. Pastor Steve Keels and I dialogued and opened Scripture together, as we discussed chapter 2 of Tim Keller's excellent book The Reason for God.  

We'd actually planned the discussion prior to the Charleston church murder of nine people at their Wednesday evening Bible study (we began by talking about this tragedy). Certainly with this horrific event on the minds of so many people, it is a timely topic. I encourage you to take 50 minutes to listen to our discussion.

If you’d like to read more on this subject, see my book If God Is Good. Many people have also handed out the If God Is Good booklets. 

Happiness or Joy��� or Both?

In this three-minute video, I talk about the artificial distinction made by many Bible-believing Christians between happiness and joy. (I address this in my book Happiness, which will release this October.)

Happiness or Joy? from Randy Alcorn

As I share in the video, in the book I’m arguing against the prevalent evangelical belief that joy is good and godly, while happiness is bad and worldly. This is without biblical base, yet is dogmatically stated. We are losing the good word “happiness” which is the language spoken by philosophers, theologians and Christian thinkers for centuries.

In AD 397, Augustine said, “Every man, whatsoever his condition, desires to be happy.” [1] He added, “There is no man who does not desire this [happiness], and each one desires it with such earnestness that he prefers it to all other things; whoever, in fact, desires other things, desires them for this end alone.” [2]

Nearly thirteen centuries later the French philosopher and mathematician Blaise Pascal (1623–1662) wrote, “All men seek happiness. This is without exception." [3] Pascal’s contemporary, English Puritan Thomas Manton (1620–1677), said, “It is as natural for the reasonable creature to desire to be happy, as it is for the fire to burn.” The Puritans consistently affirmed that Christ is the answer to the human quest for happiness. Yet in the mid-twentieth century Oswald Chambers (someone I deeply respect) and others started saying in essence, “Happiness is a shallow and worldly emotion; joy is a deep reality of our standing in Christ, not an emotion.”

I believe this has no biblical basis, and that William Tyndale and the KJV could have translated Philippians 4:4 as “Be glad” or “be happy in the Lord always, and again I say be happy.”

My biggest concern is that since all people seek happiness, instead of telling them they shouldn’t, or that the gospel doesn’t bring happiness, we should encourage them to find true and lasting happiness in the only place it can be found—Jesus. Let’s not burn the bridge between the world and the gospel of Christ by telling them to seek happiness elsewhere!

I look forward to sharing more about the book in the months to come!

 

Notes

[1] Thomas A. Hand, ed., St. Augustine on Prayer (South Bend, IN: Newman Press, 1963), 1.
[2] P. Schaff, ed., The City of God (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Co., 1887), 75.
[3] Blaise Pascal, Pensées, Section VII.

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Advice for Dads Who Didn���t Grow Up with Role Models

I grew up in a non-Christian home, having a father who, most of the time, wasn't there. My dad was a tavern owner and an alcoholic, and most of his life happened outside of our home. He didn't come to my ball games; he wasn't actively involved or, at least by appearances, interested in my life.

Yes, there is a hole that was created by his absence. Yes, that affected my attitude about the importance of fatherhood, but in a different way than you might expect. My desire and passion to be a good dad was motivated by the fact that my dad wasn't involved in my life, and I knew how much I wish he would have been. I remember as a young father thinking, “No matter what, I'm going to be there for my kids.” (Nanci and I have two daughters, and now we have five grandsons.)  

I have a close friend, also raised in a nonchristian home, and like me came to faith in Christ, and became a pastor. His unbelieving dad was there for him, and never missed his ball games. Yet, there was no spiritual leadership, no guiding him to discover and share in the most important things in life.

My friend and I often talk about the challenges and privileges of being first generation believers. By God’s grace, we’ve established Christian homes with our wives (both of whom did grow up in Christian homes), and have seen God raise up our children to love Jesus. 

Now, to my dad's credit, he did provide for our family and was a good example of working hard. But he wasn't an example of how to be a dad in most tangible ways. I did have the joy of seeing my father come to Christ at age 85 after many years of praying for him, and he lived another four years and grew in his faith. My best times in life that I ever had with my dad were during those last four years of his life. I wish I would have had those times sooner, but because we're both believers in Christ, we're going to spend eternity together. I never played catch with my dad on this earth, but maybe I'll play catch with him on the New Earth.

In this video, Paul Tripp shares some helpful advice for dads who didn’t grow up with good role models in their own fathers.

 

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How Should We View Muslims?

As followers of Christ, we should view Muslims the same way we should view all people: as created in the image of God, valuable, precious in God’s sight, and therefore precious in our sight. We should treat everyone with respect and winsomely offer them the good news of salvation in Jesus.

I detest racism and religious bigotry. Nanci and I have been troubled by anti-Arab comments we’ve heard Christians make over the years. We’ve been in Egypt, where we enjoyed our time with Arab people. We’ve met Palestinians we loved and appreciated. We enjoyed staying in Bethlehem, an Arab city. I spent a day with missionary friends in Gaza and saw the great needs of normal Palestinian people, including some Christians.

Not all Arabs are Muslims and not all Muslims are Arabs. I certainly support Israel’s right to exist and defend itself. But we shouldn’t forget that about 80% of all Christians in Israel are Arabs. It isn’t just Jews in Israel we should love, but Arabs, and certainly our Arab brothers and sisters in Christ.

Having said that, I think in their attempts to combat anti-Muslim bigotry some people are misrepresenting the truth. We must avoid intolerance toward Muslims, or any people, but we should honestly recognize that there’s considerable hatred for America and Israel, and for Jews and Christians, that’s actively cultivated in mosques in various parts of the world. Past crusades conducted by professing Christians have certainly fueled this hatred. Nonetheless, it’s not entirely correct to say to the world, as I’ve heard it said repeatedly, “Islam is a religion of peace, not war; love, not hate.”

Even those who believe this hatred is justified should acknowledge that messages of extreme hatred are delivered in certain mosques, in some cases frequently. At times, this leads to recruiting suicide bombers and other terrorists.

Obviously, we should not conclude all Muslims are violent because some are, any more than we would want to be judged as Christians by the behavior of some who call themselves Christians. But poverty and the hopelessness of many Muslims has allowed their religion to be hijacked by hatred peddlers, such as the ISIS group.

By all means let’s ward off bigotry, and befriend and defend our Muslim neighbors. At the same time, let’s be honest. Categorically claiming Mohammed, Islam, and the Quran are peaceful, not violent, sounds good at ecumenical gatherings, but unfortunately it is not the whole truth. Only by admitting that some mosques incite and facilitate terrorism can we encourage peaceful Muslims to take responsibility to counteract the cancer of hatred.

We can and should love Muslims, pray for them, defend their civil rights, reach out and help them. But we can still believe their religion is false and that no matter how devoutly they practice it, without Christ they will go to Hell. We must embrace tolerance in the right sense, while rejecting the misguided “tolerance” which sees all religious beliefs as equally valid.  

The same is true of Hindus, Buddhists, and our Jewish friends who do not accept Christ as God’s only sufficient sacrifice for sins. This applies to nominal Christians also. We do no one a favor by embracing a misguided pluralism that pretends all religions are the same or are equally true. We do people a terrible disservice by withholding the gospel as if religious people already have what they need.

Clearly we should have love, kindness, and mercy toward others. Yet, there are very honest differences between people of different belief systems. We must be careful to disagree with grace and respect. Just because we don’t believe the same thing doesn’t mean we should have an antagonistic attitude toward other people.

Several years ago, I had a conversation in Chicago with a taxi driver named Sayid. I admired his dedication to his Islamic faith. I agreed with his concerns about moral evils in America. And (not but) out of love for him I shared Christ with him and gave him one of my books that contains the gospel. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life; no one comes to the father but by me” (John 14:6). It’s wrong to imply that any faith, or object of faith, is as good as another. This is why I cannot speak of Mohammed as a great teacher, nor give praise to the Muslim Allah.*

We should never try to force conversions (nor could we anyway, since forced conversions aren’t real). But that’s very different than implying, through glowing words about Islam, that conversion isn’t necessary to go to Heaven. I must love Muslims and all people enough to tell them the truth about Jesus: “There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved” (Acts 4:12).

This Thursday, June 18 is the start of 30 Days of Prayer for the Muslim World, a prayer focus which coincides yearly with Ramadan, an important month of fasting and religious observance for Muslims. What a great opportunity to learn about, pray for, and reach out to our Muslim neighbors, and also to pray for our brothers and sisters in Christ living in the Islamic world. (You can download a free prayer guide at www.30daysprayer.com.)  The many stories about Muslims coming to faith in Christ show that God is at work in powerful ways in the lives of Muslims in the Middle East and around the world! “The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working” (James 5:16).

 

*Note: Allah is the Arabic word for God. Arabic speaking Christian believers use the same word for God, Allah, as Muslims do. But when Christians pray, they do not pray to the Muslim Allah. They pray to the triune God (Allah) of the Bible, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. 

 

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