Wendy Byrne

“Here’s the deal: no touching, no hand-holding, no flirting, no sexy talk, no dancing, and absolutely no kissy face.”

“You didn’t mention no sex, did you? I might have you on a technicality.”


“You and me alone, eating, talking, maybe even having a good time. Yeah, it might be a date.”


“I’ve seen what’s in your pantry, and I respect my arteries too much to indulge.”

“That’s the thing about snakes—even if they’re harmless, they look like such badasses it doesn’t really matter.”

“You’re lying. You’re really wearing a pair of granny panties.”
― Wendy Byrne, Bad to the Bone