Michael Joe Armijo's Blog, page 84

I Had An Affair

Napoleon’s passion for luxury included his favorite cologne water.

After he washed, he liked to pour cologne over his neck, chest and shoulders.
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 20, 1987
Wednesday

Louise Long, the new black woman in my office is finally getting some productive work completed. I tease her about her ‘getting away with nothing’. It’s not really a tease though. She finds me fun to work with. She’s a church going woman and I do have fun with her. I like her a lot (especially the expressions on her face when I say things that surprise her).
Louise said, “You smell good.”
“Oh, it’s probably my new Lagerfeld cologne.”

I haven’t given mom a call from work this week. It’s just too darn busy.

Eileen left a message on my voice mail at work about how this coming Thursday is a ‘no go’ situation for meeting-up because something has come up that she has to do. Such is life with Eileen.

I got a parking ticket again! It’s another ten dollars. I guess that amount isn’t so bad. Some people pay that much to park for the day in The City.

I took a nap and went to the gym. Mark E. was there and we worked out together for a bit. Stewart Western came by, too. Stewart and I talked for a little while.

A gal that I met some years ago while bicycling in Alameda appeared at the gym and made some small talk with me. She’s cute but she never went out with me the first time. And so I decided to give up on the whole idea of her despite her smiles and sweet hello’s. I’ve chosen to disregard her flirtation routine. When I first met her I recalled that she told me she was part Portuguese. Her friend was overweight.
PHOTO: Scott Lauer, San Francisco on June 6, 1987
I met a new guy at the gym named Scott Lauer. He’s a cool, blond fellow who is stationed at the Alameda Naval Air Station on the big ship called the ENTERPRISE. He’s a big lug. I find him to be a nice chap though.  I think he said he is originally from the state of Ohio.
Scott said, “I thought I detected an accent from you…like from Australia or something.”
I laughed, thinking that was a joke. He was serious though. And so now he calls me “mate” (a term used in Australia for good friends).

I spoke to Mark E. about his directing classes at the A.C.T. (American Conservatory Theater) in San Francisco. Now I’m interesting in possibly taking an acting class there (for fun). I don’t see it as future growth in the entertainment industry but more for self-actualized needs for my inner psyche and social skills. I’ll wait and see.

I read an ad in the Alameda Times Star newspaper about chauffeurs wanted at PARK N’ FLY to take airline passengers to and from the Oakland Airport. I may look into it as a bit of part-time work…but then again, a lot of my free time would be lost (maybe not).

I called Jeff Sombat in Honolulu to thank him for the cute exercise teddy bear he sent to me by mail.

I also called Johnny in L.A. and we caught up on some things. He’s been recording a lot of music. He’s still very much into his music.
Johnny said, “My music teacher, Wendy, is sincerely sure that I will get a record deal with my songs.”
This sounds very promising. Good for him.

I enjoyed lunch with Freddie today. She blew me away with something she said in one sentence.
“You know, Michael, I had an affair with a white doctor who’s married in his van last week.”
“What?”
She laughed…but was very serious.  Wild (all I could think of was that sexy Dr. Kildare).
I thought, “Go Freddie!”
She’s too much.  It did sound exciting though.
Freddie continued with company talk: “Michael, I plan on quitting Yellow Pages. Carla is going to quit, too.”
“I’ll believe it when I see it,” I said.

“Tell me, what do you want out of life?”
-as heard while watching the 2011 film THE DEBT

Go Confidently

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you’ve imagined.”
-Henry David Thoreau

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 19, 1987
Tuesday

I am getting a lot of work done at the office.

After work I telephoned Danny Garcia before I went for my bike ride.

I chose to remain home and enjoy myself. I watched a movie called CHILDREN OF THE CORN.

I decided to telephone Chris Cordellos, too.
“Hey Mike, do you want to go to a party in San Francisco this Saturday night.”
And so, we may go.

I officially cancelled out on Ron Bygum’s facial appointment. He’s that delinquent Yellow Page client that offered me a free facial. I also backed out of Steve Flander’s ‘bite out’ for tomorrow night. There’s just no need.

I did telephone Eileen Grabinsky once again. She’s famous for ‘no answer’.

Freddie Perriliat paid me the five-dollars I loaned her. Carla has not. It just means it’s the last time she sees green out of me!

To be a winner, you don’t have to win every game.
-Michael J Armijo
PHILOSOPHICAL STATEMENTS

Improving With Age

“Find something to believe in.”
-as heard while watching the 2008 film “GOOD”

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 18, 1987
Monday

My Hawaiian pals, Jeff and Carla, called me in the early hours of 6AM. They were ‘buzzing’ from the booze.
Carla announced, “We have four bottles of KORBEL Champagne left and we plan on saving two for when you arrive!”
“Hmm…we’ll see if they can last for that long,” I said, laughing.

I dreaded the idea of going to work today because of all the work I had at my desk. Oh well, Freddie is returning. That will help.

I cancelled out on both Ron Bygum’s facial for this Wednesday AND Steve Flander for dinner and a drink with a phony excuse.
I explained, “I can’t make it because I have to babysit my niece, Ashley.”
I knew both events would cost me some money, so I figured I’d pass on both of them. I don’t need to spend money for a facial or for cocktails and a dinner. I definitely don’t need it.

Bad ass Nikki Bovee came into the office with a look of wonder and bewilderment about the one hundred and three pending delinquent San Francisco Accounts. There are only about forty-three that are my responsibility. The rest belong to Lily. I reduced my batch to thirty by the end of the day. It irks me a bit because I am going the job so very well while others tend to move so slowly. The time in my current office is passing quickly though. I had best be in Yellow Page Sales soon! I figure I have only a month or so to bear with all of these delinquent accounts.

I ate lunch in the cafeteria with Freddie. I loaned her five dollars. I had loaned another five dollars to Carla during my first break. I’d better see my ten dollars returned tomorrow…or else!

I did it again. I took a nap after work. My mind was mentally exhausted from work.

Eileen called. She was my wake up call. We talked a bit.
“I’m going to Lake Berryessa this weekend with Katrina.”
I replied nonchalantly in my own condescending way, “Well, I’m sure you’ll both have a BLAST.”
I realized that I haven’t even spilled the beans about my forthcoming trip to Hawaii on the 4th of July. So there!
I said, “Well, I guess I won’t be seeing you for a long time.”
Eileen asked sweetly, “Why don’t you come over here to visit this Thursday night?”
“Well, maybe I can work that out,” I replied.
I really don’t see why she can’t come to see me for a change!

After my nap and the Eileen phone call I hit the gym. Dave Trapp was there.
Dave said, “You know, Mike…there’s this new health line product that I may be selling.”
“It’s not some sort of steroids trip, is it?”
“Oh no, it’s one hundred percent natural and it’s an alternative to steroids.”
“Well, I might be interested.”

I mentioned my accomplishment with the Bay to Breakers run to Dave, Kathy and Mark Gebhardt.
I said to Mark, “My calves are still sore but it’s a good pain.”
The 'new' Mark just laughed.

I realized that I wouldn’t be as sore if I hadn’t gone for that jog in Alameda the Saturday before the run. I still feel good that I finished the seven and one-half miles (12K) in one hour and fifteen seconds. Last year it took me one hour and twenty minutes. I am improving with age.

Speaking of age, Mark Gebhardt is twenty-seven years old. He was born in 1960 and he graduated from San Leandro High in 1978. We talked about meeting up for lunch since we both happen to work in San Francisco. He gave me his card. He seems like a cool guy.

While in the locker room at the gym I saw a fat, bald fellow. Someone called him ‘Dennis’. I realized he was Dennis Darby. He’s a guy that went to my high-school and graduated with me. I couldn’t believe that he’d lost his hair! I feel great for twenty-seven (going on twenty-eight) when some guys my age look like they’re in their early forties already. Gee whiz!

“LIFE never forgives weakness.”
-as heard while watching the 2004 film DOWNFALL

The Surprise Accompaniment

“Someday…someone has to say ENOUGH!”

-Perseus,
The legendary founder of Mycenae and of the Perseid dynasty of Danaans who was the first of the heroes of Greek mythology whose exploits in defeating various archaic monsters provided the founding myths of the Twelve Olympians. Perseus was the Greek hero who killed the Gorgon Medusa, and claimed Andromeda, having rescued her from a sea monster sent by Poseidon in retribution for Queen Cassiopeia, declaring herself more beautiful than the Nereid’s.

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 17, 1987
Sunday

I actually made it through the entire BAY TO BREAKERS race in San Francisco!

Mark came by to pick me up. He brought “Ivy” along with him.  I tried not to ‘let on’ my disappointment.  He’s always pulling the surprise accompaniment on these things that were planned between the two of us.  Why does he do this without informing me?  Oh well, I was cordial.  The race started precisely at 8AM.  I was home in Alameda by 11AM; whereby, I still had plenty of Sunday left over.
I went to mom and dad’s house after Mark and Ivy dropped me off at home. Mom and I went to Park Street to look at a JAGUAR that was for sale on a Used Car lot for only $8,995. I was tempted but I just don’t have the money. I only have the credit and there’s no sense in spending money that I don’t really have.

Mom and I continued our Sunday excursion to San Francisco. We planned on going to FURNISHINGS 2000 but the place wasn’t where it was supposed to be (?). We ate lunch at NEW JOE’s and walked around. It was fun to just window shop until we pooped out.

We returned to Alameda and I needed a nap. I woke up to Dad’s phone call at around 6PM.
“Hey Mike on the news now they’re showing the BAY TO BREAKERS Highlights.”
“Oh cool…I’ll turn it on. Maybe I’ll see myself on TV!”
I wasn’t visible on TV. I know I was somewhere in the crowd.

I lounged around at home until I decided to go over to mom and dad’s to watch a bit of FALCON AND THE SNOWMAN, a pretty decent movie.

After the film I went home and went to bed when I remembered something. It was Jeff Sombat’s Birthday. It just flashed in my memory, so I quickly called his apartment in Honolulu.
“Happy Birthday Jeff!”
He was happy to hear from me. Luckily for the time difference I wasn’t the last to wish him well.
Jeff exclaimed, “You know, I was just getting ready for a Birthday party here.”
“Why wasn’t I invited?”
He laughed.
We laughed.
Good night.   I just hope I’m not leading him on. It’s easy to flirt with a voice.


“In its own special way, last is the same as first.”
-John Katzenbach
THE ANALYST

His Own Decisions

Questions are only useful when the answers will lead somewhere.

-Olen Steinhauer
THE NEAREST EXIT, a novel

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 16, 1987
Saturday

Suzy Miller came over to the townhouse at around 10AM.

Suzy and I left together for Park Street to eat at OLE’S WAFFLE SHOP. We both love the waffle and can never decide whether to order it or the ham and cheese omelet. After having breakfast we thought we’d be spontaneous and adventurous and drive up to Sacramento to see Suzy’s brother, Mike. Suzy was willing to drive.
PHOTO:  Me and Suzy, 1977 School Days Suzy wrote in my HOUSE BOOK:

May 16, 1987
Dear Mike,
Well here I am again, a month before our high-school reunion. We went to OLE’S and bought our LOTTO Tickets…12 Million dollars at stake. I hope one of us wins. Well, see you around.
Take Care.
Love, Suzy

I also thought the drive to Sacramento would be a perfect opportunity to drop by Judy Geniella’s house to get my white jeans. Time passed so quickly and I wasn’t in my car, so I never did stop by to get my jeans.

Mrs. Miller was going to accompany us. It took forever because Mrs. Miller took so long to get ready. We stopped at SAFEWAY and also at TOYS R US in Richmond, CA.

We didn’t arrive in Sacramento until 5:30PM. Mike is living with a twenty-one year old semi-attractive lady who ‘was’ Greg Manachevitz’ sister-in-law. Why he’s living with her and her child is beyond me. Such is life. He’ll need to make his own decisions.

We ended up eating dinner at 10PM and didn’t leave Sacramento until 11:45PM or so. I was home in Alameda by 2AM! Yawn.

I thought of the final scene of PAPILLON, based on the novel by Henri Charriere and starring Steve McQueen. I felt like PAPILLON, who escapes French Guiana on the tide, floating away on a sack of coconuts. It was an absurd thought, but at certain moments there’s nothing else to do but humor your own delirium as something you don’t choose but simply endure.
-Roberto Saviano
GOMMORRAH

Ain't That a Shame: Am I Wasting My Time?

Ain’t That a Shame: Mr. X, A True Story


Cast of characters:
Mr. X:  an Ashamed GAY MAN ‘of a certain age and from a different era’ who is in a tizzy of concern of what people may think in our current early 21st Century Society
Peter:  Mr. X’s male partner/lover/spouse
Nick:  A concerned GAY MAN ‘of a certain age and from a different era’ who is worried that if someone google’s his name a bit of his past would be revealed.
Michael:  Me, the BLOG writer, who is transcribing his diary from a generation ago
Distinguished Author:  The one sought for ‘advice and counsel’

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Hi Michael,

I hope you are well.

Hey, I need to talk to you about something. Mr. X is still a friend, in fact, he does some freelance work for me. His partner Peter and he are the proud parents of two great kids. He contacted me the other day because a friend had Googled him and your blog posts with his full name and image came up.

Mr. X is pretty upset.  To be completely honest, when you notified me on Facebook about the ones concerning me I wasn't thrilled but naively thought it was limited to the people who read your blog, who don't really know me. It never occurred to me that it would show up in a Google search. Mr. X is concerned about his kids and family as well as some of his personal and professional connections.

I also run in a lot of circles and some of that stuff is rather personal. I realize it was 25 years ago. I am currently writing a book in which I talk about my past but am careful to leave out names and even to change circumstances so that people would not recognize the individuals involved. It is, after all, a book about my experiences, not an expose about others.

So, is it really necessary to use names? I'm not all that concerned about an old fully dressed photo, but I'd rather essays about my personal connections from decades ago not be readily available to anyone Googling my name.

Mr. X would like you to contact him. His e-mail address is MrX@.net. Mr. X wants his name and image removed and said he is prepared to take legal action. I would just as soon have my name be changed or initials used as well since, again, it just didn't occur to me that this would surface in a Google search.
Thanks,
Nick

Hi Nick,
What are you talking about? This seems so silly.
The ‘ONE’ picture of Mr. X in my blog was taken with his permission and is a simple portrait (as well as the photos of you were taken with your permission).
The mention of you (or Mr. X) in my blog is strictly based on my own words in my diary from years ago with my own reflections of those times.
I am sorry the two of you don't want any information about yourselves on the internet but there's nothing negative that I've written (or that can be misconstrued as an invasion of privacy).
I don't really want to contact Mr. X. If---after 25 plus years he has never chosen to contact me--why would I want to talk to him now? He can, of course, still email me via my blog.
Sincerely,
Michael

Our understanding of the law is that taking a picture of someone with their permission does not translate to permission to publish it. I guess we all have our own definition of respecting others. Mr. X doesn't want to talk for personal reasons, he wants to have a legitimate discussion about a situation he didn't invite.
Nick

I will be in contact with my attorney and I will get back to you.
Michael

Well, it's kind of sad that it would come to that. I've inadvertently posted pics or posts that friends were uncomfortable with because of their involvement and went out of my way to remove them as soon as I could because the friendships mean way more to me than the post. I don't even question why they might have an issue with it because it's none of my business. This is, after all, supposed to be about fun and positive sharing. I don't get why it matters in the least if you use pseudonyms. The people reading your posts don't know us from Adam. But our friends who now may stumble across the published diary of someone we met 25 years ago do not know you from Adam. They know us. Because I am the face of the company I work for in the community, I work hard to separate my public and private lives. I'm thoughtful about which posts I share with whom. I realize we were more acquaintances than friends, but basic human decency would never lead me to insist upon keeping a post online that hurt someone else for the sake of my own vanity. At my place of work we always have individuals sign consent forms before posting photos.
Nick
Dear Distinguished Author:
How are you doing? I have a favor to ask you....
As you know, I write a daily blog: www.007gentleman.blogspot.com where I have transcribed my old diaries. I was recently contacted by someone whose picture I posted and who I wrote about. The picture was a simple profile pic taken with his permission '25 plus' years ago. There was nothing negative written about him but he's concerned that family members and/or business associates will google him and see this photo and my blog (which has a definitive gay man’s slant in the 1980s).
He has threatened legal action if I don't remove the picture and change his name. Since you're the most proficient writer I know...what would you recommend?
I guess my blog is getting so popular maybe I need to publish a book. lol
Hugs,
Michael

Dear Michael:
Sheesh. What a royal pain. I presume this is a gentleman 'of a certain age and different era'. He can’t really sue you, but in the name of keeping the peace I would recommend taking the photo down and changing his name.  But you're right: that's a flattering sign that your blog is getting popular.

P.S. I just went through your blog, trying to guess who the injured party would be. But it's all so playful, and fun, and elegant and attractive, how could anybody not be flattered to be included? You're right, it could make an entertaining book.
Warmly,
The Distinguished Author

Yeah Distinguished Author,
"Sheesh" is right. You'd think the injured party would be happy with a picture of him from 25 years ago. He surely looks better then...I'm sure. LoL
Alas, I learned from a former roommate of his that he is with a man named Peter and they have adopted kids and is concerned that his kids may see it and/or any colleagues or biz associates (I GUESS). Ridiculous bcuz there's nothing devastating about him in anything I wrote.
I like to write full names of my real life people because there are some that I've lost touch with and I have 'in fact' been found by a few old friends/coworkers via the blog. In addition, I have a success story where one gal who was trying to find her mother (a longtime high school girlfriend of mine) actually found her and was reunited with her mom after she emailed me. Luckily, because her mom died 3 or 4 years later from pancreatic cancer and she would never have had the bond with her real mother otherwise.
I think you're right though...just to keep the peace I'll remove the picture of Mr. X. Who needs to deal with it? I would think he'd be flattered to be included but you know how some people are...scaredy cats.
Thanks for your advice.
Michael

Nick,
Can you send me your tel#? I'd like to call you NOW. Thx. I just tried this telephone number but I guess that's not good for you anymore (?).
Michael

Here is my tel# but I have to go pick up my roommates from work and don't have a hands-free device. Would be happy to talk tomorrow. I hope we can figure this out because you're a great guy and I guess we have very different viewpoints on this.
Thanks,
Nick

No, I think our viewpoints are similar. It's not like I don't understand. I completely understand. I just want to discuss it with you verbally...easier than writing for hours and I have a few stories to share. Can I call you when you get back?  It shouldn't take long.
Michael

A few days later...
SATURDAY Morning, May 5, 2012

Hi Nick,
I found out that I cannot really be sued for what I've written in my blog. An attorney & a well-known published author friend advised me; however, I did remove that one pic of Mr. X and changed his name to a very appropriate new name. Mr. X was not----and never will be---a big part of my life, so I just decided to do this to 'keep the peace'. Have a happy day. After all, that is what our lives are meant to be: HAPPY
Hugs,
Michael

Thanks, Michael. Mr. X and Peter are very protective of their kids because people sometimes freak out about them being gay parents.
Nick
Ain’t that a shame?   I would think that Mr. X and Peter would be proud to be who they are as gay men with children. I am a gay man with a grown daughter.  My daughter will surely learn much about me by reading my blog. I am also in a long-term relationship with a man with two children of his own. One would think Mr. X and Peter would be overjoyed to be included in the blog written by a gay man—even if the tidbit of writing was brief and not harmful.  If it was harmful I would surely omit it.  Alas, it is the early 21st Century and I can relate to our current society who are so discriminating. It’s clear that Mr. X and Peter are two men ‘of a certain age and a different era’. The new generations of gay men and lesbian women of today in their 20s and 30s are getting married left and right. This above episode may be quite an eyebrow raiser in years to come.



I don’t know what went wrong between us, but you and I discussed friendship once. I said that friendship is built on two things—respect and trust. Even if you don’t like me, you can still depend on me and trust me. I’ve never shared your secrets with anyone.

-Stieg Larsson
THE GIRL WHO PLAYED WITH FIRE

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 15, 1987
Friday

Work was rather stressful today. I think it was because Steve Flander called. I met him for lunch across the street at MAX’s. Word leaked to Nikki, my second line manager, and she shared the fact that I met with him. He’s delinquent on his advertising, yet the sales people view it different. Suddenly, Nikki, Jim Prichard and Bob Bilejeu of KEY ACCOUNT SALES gathered around my desk. They made me feel as if I’d done something wrong to meet with Steve Flander today.

Steve treated me to lunch and we had a good talk. We may even meet up next Wednesday at SPENGER’S FISH GROTTO in Berkeley. However, now I am having second thoughts about meeting up with him at all. He’s a jolly, overweight character. He could be a bad ‘eat some more’ influence.

I telephoned Eileen. We finally had a discussion. I went over the letter she’d written me. As far as I can see our relationship is NOT working out.
“Why don’t you come over and stay with me next weekend…or even the weekend of my Birthday?” I asked.
“I’m supposed to spend the Memorial Day Weekend of your birthday with Katrina in Lake Berryessa.”
I thought quietly, without saying the words, “Why in the hell am I wasting my time?"
Eileen shouted, “Do you notice how I’m not jealous when you tell me things?”
This leads me to believe that she IS jealous or she wouldn’t have asked that question.

And so…on this Friday evening I felt a need for a walk along Alameda’s South Shore beach. I invited my Dad to go for a walk with me but he had to go to work at 11PM tonight, so he passed on my offer.

I dropped by around the corner to see John, Sherri and Ashley in hopes that they might want to take Ashley off of their hands. John was getting ready for work.
John said, “Oh, Sherri and Ashley went to some SESAME STREET Show with Tony, Helen and Lauren.”
And so, I talked to my brother, John, for a while.

I forfeited the walk along the beach idea. Instead, I went to WHEREHOUSE RECORDS and rented two dumb movies that I didn’t really want to watch: ON THE WALL and ON THE NICKEL.

Finally, I decided it was a Friday night and I felt like dancing and meeting someone fun. I drove to Palo Alto, near Stanford University, to that fun club called THE VORTEX. It was a mistake. THE VORTEX was just ‘dead’ on this night. I stayed for a short while and actually ‘danced with myself’ when they played BILLY IDOL, singing DANCING WITH MYSELF. I left the club at 11:45PM. I sat there in rest mode in the driver’s seat until I finally started the car and just drove back home. Suzy Miller was coming to visit tomorrow. I went to bed. Yawn.

The sense of loss and aloneness was at last becoming a dull ache instead of a burning pain. It might be that he could begin to go out and act like a human being again.
-Nial Kent
THE DIVIDED PATH

What About Our French Kisses?

Conversation should be as easy as breathing.
-Michael J Armijo
PHILOSOPHICAL STATEMENTS

In Catholic school students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructions also advised that using a bit of imagination was ‘OKAY’ to express the Truth differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings.

Getting a Hairdryer through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor?”
“Of course child, what may I do for you?”
“Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your Robes perhaps?”
“I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.”
“With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.”

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first.
The official asked, “Father, do you have anything to declare?”
“From the top of my head down to my waist I have nothing to declare.”
The official thought this answer strange, so asked, “And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?”
“I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.”
Roaring with laughter, the official said, “Go ahead, Father. Next please!”

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 14, 1987
Thursday

It was payday today. The $597 new pay was nothing to write mom about though.

Suzy Miller telephoned.
“I think I’m going to move again. I might want to take you up on your offer to move in with you at your townhouse.”
“You should do what feels right to you.”
“Could I come over this Saturday? I just want to look at your place again.”
“Of course you can. Where is your brother, Mike, these days?”
“Oh, he’s in Sacramento.”
If Suzy moves in with me it will give me an additional three-hundred dollars a month. It would allow for some monetary ‘breathing room’. I’m all for it.

Eileen wrote me a letter. It confirms what I already knew. She is a mere child. I couldn’t believe her statement about our NOT HAVING ANY MEMORIES. She is too much. I’m sure she’s wondering about how I shall respond now. She also acted so surprised at how I referred to her as ‘my girlfriend’. Give me a break! She’s the one who implanted that notion into my head. I really don’t have time for her silly little games. I say, “Later for that broad!”

I called Danny Garcia at his hairdresser work number.
“Can you come over to my shop at 8:30 tonight?” Danny asked.
“Okay.”
Danny is in somewhat of a predicament. They sold his apartment building and it will soon become condominiums.
Danny said, “Laurie and I have to move out soon. We have only three days to be out of there!”

My brother, Tony, came over to visit my new office at Pac Bell Directory. I introduced him to Carla and Nikki.
I advised Tony, “Well now, I think I should come over to visit your office next.”
I didn’t make the time to visit his office today but I may do that tomorrow. It’s only a block away.

My Dad called me, so I went to visit him.
“I’m sorry about last Sunday. You were right about parking in front of the Ida Tawasha house. It’s a public street.”
Dad was loving and said, “You know, I love you, Mike.”
I noticed he’d had a couple of beers. I believed his words though. I love him, too.

Johnny phoned from L.A., leaving a message on my recorder while I was on my visit to Danny in Alamo.
I measured the distance and it was thirty miles from Alameda to Alamo. When I configure the going and the return this means I biked a full sixty miles! That’s pretty good. Danny was cutting someone’s hair when I arrived. When he was finished we went to that New Mexican Restaurant. Danny’s cohorts from work tagged along. We drank margaritas, gabbing and laughing at the way some of the people were dancing. It was a pleasant evening. I drove straight to mom and dad’s house afterward.

I let Carla borrow sixty dollars from me today. She went to the bank exchange and her purse was stolen. She had to get new keys, etc. What a pain! She was meeting a locksmith at her house after work.
“Michael, I even had my telephone number disconnected.”
She seems to be such a risk as far as a small loan; however, it was payday. I have a heart. She says she will repay me my sixty dollars as well as treat me to lunch (because I treated her to lunch today). For some reason I doubt the lunch treat will be reciprocated.

Danny, his coworker, Laurie, and I may all be going to Los Angeles on the last weekend of this month. We’ll see if that happens.

I keep thinking of Eileen and her written comments and reasoning. How do I come back with a good reply? She burns me up! I refuse to dwell on it. She’s such a flake. We learn from the foolish mistakes we make.
‘No memories’ she wrote…give me a break! What about our French kisses?
Perhaps now I will make it a point to erase her from my memory!

Anthropologically at least, a kiss on the mouth, especially with all the plunging of tongues and the exchanging of saliva, is another form of intercourse, and it’s not surprising that it should make the mind and body surge with gorgeous sensations.
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

Don't Dream It's Over

“No one thinks about the bigger picture anymore, just his own gain.”

-Olen Steinhauer
THE NEAREST EXIT, a novel

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 13, 1987
Wednesday

It is so damn busy at work right now. Ugh!

I thought Danny Garcia and I were going to see a flick but plans didn’t work out. He did call me after I left two messages on his recorder. We may just meet up tomorrow for dinner.
Danny said, “Yeah, there’s a grand opening at this new Mexican restaurant in Alamo.”

Steve Flander returned my call. We may meet up at SPENGER’s in Berkeley next Wednesday. I hope he’s not getting delinquent with his Yellow Page advertising again. I need to review his payment arrangement to be sure he’s on-target.

I did call Jeff Sombat and gave him the details of my arrival to Honolulu on July 4th. He seemed to show some excitement about my returning to the island.

I tried giving Eileen a call but there was no answer at 9PM. It’s strange. The folks she knows are visiting from New York and I can’t believe she took them out at such a late hour. Or could it be that her phone was unplugged? Why can’t she just ‘play ball’ with me?

Paul Margolis listened to two of my incoming phone calls with customers today. How degrading. He’s such a jerk!

Laverne Butler called me from Pacific Bell. She’s going to apply for a Customer Service Representative job in Pac Bell Directory’s CSO-Customer Service Office. I encouraged her.

I said to Laverne excitedly, “That sounds like a good idea if you want to get into Yellow Page sales eventually!”

Of course, Rachelle has not called me. I’m giving up on her.

I like getting out of work at 4PM. I just need to halt the naptime scene once I get home. I did some aerobics last night for about an hour. That was all I did though.

I wrote to Jeff in Hawaii and sent him a check for twenty-three dollars for his 23rd Birthday. I really like the song by Crowded House called DON’T DREAM IT’S OVER. It was relaxing to write to Jeff as that song played.

Say what one will, words rarely capture the immediate emotional assault of a piece of poignant music, which allows the composer to say not “It felt something like this,” but rather “Here is the unnamable emotion I felt, and even my obsession with structure, proportion, and time, inside of you.”
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

A Bumble Bee

As the robustly sensuous painter Georgia O’Keefe once said: “In a way, nobody sees a flower really, it is so small we haven’t time—and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time.”
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 12, 1987
Tuesday

Work is so busy that it is beginning to get mind boggling. Both Rhoda and I feel we are doing the work of two representatives single-handedly. I am even at the point where I hate to take my break as I will get behind.

Dave Trapp said, “You look like a bumble bee.”
He said this because was wearing my short vertical striped yellow and black shorts that Eileen bought for me.  Do I sting like a bee?

I ran into Steven Green at the gym. I hadn’t seen him in a while. He reminded me of what an obnoxious pain he could be.   I didn’t give him any mind and went on with my work out.

Angela came by me now and then for some simple flirtation time. I was happy that I burned 244 calories on the rower machine. It’s always a triumph to see that ending number light up.
I shouldn’t have done it but I took another nap after work. I heard Dad and Ashley at my front doorstep. I surprised them because they didn’t think I would be home until around 6PM. It’s nice to work the 8AM to 4PM shift.

The party is over. I received a parking ticket at my newly discovered free parking spot in San Francisco. I still came out one dollar ahead when you calculate the days that I did get free parking. Who is to tell whether I will get a ticket tomorrow? It’s not worth it to park there on a regular basis. I will be safe to park at my usual $2.75 per day parking lot.

Freddie called.
“I’ll be returning to work on Monday, May 18th, Michael.”
“That’s good news, Freddie, because we are overloaded with work. We need your help. I haven’t been taking my breaks but I’ve decided to just take them ‘no matter what’. That health break time is too important...you know.”

There’s still no response from Eileen after the ‘Dear Jane’ letter I sent. Perhaps she is simply a lost cause.

I still dream of going to London, England in November. I will do it if I really decide I want to do it. The second trip to Hawaii in July is still a likely happening.

The number ‘EIGHT’ means money. I foresee 1988 as a money year for me. My debts shall be gone. I will have more and more to build on and save. I must not forget that I will be going into commission sales sometime after April 1988, too.

That Steve Green pissed me off when he downplayed my Account Collections job. He’s such an ass. He acts like he’s Mr. Qualified Expert sometimes. As far as I’m concerned it makes me view him more as Mr. Imbecile.

Carla complimented my haircut yesterday. She also made an announcement that wasn’t too surprising.
“I have a new boyfriend.”
“How did you meet him?”
“Oh Michael, I’m in love. He’s visiting from El Salvador, my home country.”
Her eyes popped and her pupils dilated, making her look all the more sexy.
Carla added, “You know, I’m on a new FIT FOR LIFE ‘Richard Simmons’ weight loss program.”
“That’s great.”
I encouraged her, thinking that Mr. El Salvador must be rather sexy himself for her to want to get more fit.

I should take my Grandma out for dinner on her birthday in July. That would be a first for me. She deserves the love and the time.

Our pupils expand involuntarily when we’re aroused or excited.
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES

I Want To Get Serious

He looked at her coldly with eyes that expressed the most perfect scorn.
-Stendhal
THE RED AND THE BLACK

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 11, 1987
Monday

Work was a breeze. Steve Adam is gone and Paul is his stand-in. I just despise the Paul Margolis attitude. Nikki walks in now and then to make things seem a little better.

Carla, of course, called in for a sick day. She’s too much.

She did confide in me, “Michael, I’ve been thinking of quitting. I only get one-thousand dollars a month and I don’t feel I need to work.”
I was a little envious.

Eileen called me while I was at work.
I said, “You can expect an in-depth letter from me soon. I wrote it last night.”
“What did you write?”
“Well, you’ll see.”
I wrote that she needs to make a choice. It’s either me or Katrina. I want more.  I want to get serious. Does she?
PHOTO:  Eileen Grabinsky
I napped when I arrived home.

Danny Garcia woke me. He wants to get together and we may meet up this coming Wednesday night. We shall see.

I received travel information and brochures for London. It’s interesting. I do want to go there in November.

I did about an hour of aerobics exercise. I biked for half an hour. I drove to my gym in San Leandro. Stewart was there. Angel was there, too. I lost 166 calories according to the rowing machine workout.

I stopped at the store and bought some almonds and six diet sodas along with a box of Vanilla Wafers. I started to watch Joan Rivers on the Tonight Show but it seemed boring, so I switched to a video that was also boring. It was perfect for allowing me to fall asleep. I went to bed. Yawn.

Craving vanilla…
A large bar of vanilla bath soap, sitting in an antique porcelain dish, acts as an aromatic beacon. While I steep in waves of vanilla, a friend brings me a vanilla cream seltzer, followed by a custard made with vanilla beans that have come all the way from Madagascar.
-Diane Ackerman
A NATURAL HISTORY OF THE SENSES