Ad Hudler's Blog, page 39

Stereotype of the Week

Toyota Camry Drivers never exceed the speed limit.

Seriously, if you see one speeding then call the cops because it's probably been stolen.

Ugly Betty is Scaring Me

I have had fitful sleep for the past three nights ... bad, anxiety-ridden dreams ... constant waking up. And I've been wondering why ...

My wife and I were on our morning wog (a walk interspersed with hopeful, periodic sprints) when I realized why:

Ugly Betty

We're renting all of season three and watching it late at night, before going to bed. And you need to know that Ad Hudler can handle NO SUSPENSE when it comes to television or movies. Seriously, I can't even watch reruns of "I Dream of Jean...

Ahh, the power of self-deception! (How to lose weight)

You know how you suddenly can experience a moment of insight about yourself? It's as if you leave your body for a second and look down at yourself and see something, unfiltered, that you'd never noticed before. A reality that others -- but not you -- have noted long ago. Things like: Geez, I really have gotten negative. Or: Geez, my hair is really thinning out.

I had one yesterday, one of these flash of insights. Unfortunately. Or fortunately. I'm not sure which is true.

I was sitting at my com...

You know times are bad ...

I was on a whirlwind tour of beaches in my area with a friend yesterday, on assignment for Airtran Airways' inflight magazine ... when I noticed something very odd at the Naples Ritz-Carlton. There, on the sand, were their trademark blue beach umbrellas and chaise lounges ... and every one of them had a big, white US Bank logo on them! Indeed, times must be very tough in order for the upscale hotel chain to sully their appearance of perfection like that ... and I will admit that it really che...

Where have those hands been?!?

The plumber finally showed up to give me an estimate on re-piping my entire house (built in 1951 with galvanized pipe, which is all clogged up now). Nice guy. He runs a great plumbing company ... have used him for years.

At any rate, he comes inside, gives my hand a good shake, and says, "Sorry it took me so long to get this scheduled, but I have a sick daughter."

"How old is she?" I asked

"Eleven."

"I hope she's okay."

"Actually," he said. "She has swine flu. Kinda nasty stuff."

As we walked aroun...

A query of carpet-cleaning ...

Okay, people, I've lived in six states and even more houses, and I've NEVER shampooed a carpet. What's wrong with me? Is it something that only dog-owners have to do? (We have cats)
Am I a control-freak neatnik? (NO FOOD allowed outside of the kitchen!)
Who shampoos their carpets ... and why?

Great American Cities

After dropping our daughter off at college in central Ohio, my wife and I headed for Pittsburgh for a weekend. We'd never been, and we were heartily impressed. We decided that it was truly a great American city.

Which lead to this discussion: What makes a city a truly Great American City? What traits must it have? This is the list we came up with:

1. Must be home to several Fortune 500 companies, and some of these MUST actually manufacture something in that city.
2. Must have large public buildi...

I'd like mine well-done, please.

Talking with a good friend about the trouble we have sleeping, and how we move and shift about all night long, trying to get comfortable.

"Oh, yes," she said. "I call it 'rotisserie sleeping.'"

Are we growing too soft as a civilization?

This from my hometown newspaper, The News-Press of Fort Myers, Florida:

"Thursday morning, a man donning a Tommy Bahama-style straw hat, and a beige Hawaiian shirt with green and yellow flowers handed a bank teller in North Fort Myers a note with directions to hand over an undisclosed amount of money."

And guess what, people? She DID! No questions asked. Here you go, buddy. Have a super day! Enjoy your new money!!

Did you know that bank tellers today are trained to give into burglars' requests ...

A DRAGON of a book festival!

I just got back from The Decatur (suburban Atlanta) Book Festival, which has grown into the biggest indy reading festival in the country in just four years. It's easy to see why. This thing was so professionally organized it was as if Martha Stewart put it on. Take a look at this very cool banner that hung from the Dekalb County Courthouse:



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Then, they had the blowup version of this dragon behind the courthouse. It was the talk of the authors and you can see why:[image error]

All I can say is: OUCH!

At any...