Laina Turner's Blog, page 15
February 17, 2019
How to Create Your Self-Publishing Production Schedule
I’ve talked before that part of being a professional writer meant you needed to show up every day (thanks, Steven Pressfield). Showing up every day ready to work your tail off means you need a plan. You need a self-publishing production schedule.
You also must hold yourself accountable.
Unless your plan is to show up, sit there, and watch Netflix. Which is a plan I do love and would support. Trust me if that job paid I’d be doing it. But until the job materializes that type of behavior isn’t going to get you very far in your writing career.
#thestruggleisrealfolks

As a professional writer, one of the many things you need to have as part of your business plan is a publishing production schedule. You need to know where you want to go and when you want to get there so you can plan how it’s going to happen.
If you love to plan this is going to be your favorite part of writing. You can even get a shiny new notebook and colored pens (that’s my favorite part of planning, the office supplies). Just don’t get so entrenched in writing the plan you forget to write the book.
I personally feel it’s important to have a timeline and I make all the authors I work with create one. That way they’re not shocked when waking up one day, 4 years have gone by, and the book still isn’t finished.
Time flies so fast and if you wait until the “right” moment. If you wait to start until you have the perfect plan. It may never happen. It’s called the Maybe Someday scenario.
You also don’t want to plan on starting Monday or tomorrow because that rarely happens either.
If you’re serious about making a living at this writing thing, then treat it as such.
START TODAY!
There are many factors that will go into creating your publishing schedule. Questions if you don’t already know the answer too you will need to set aside some time to figure out. The answers are important to your career. You don’t want to wing it.
Sit down, grab your fancy office supplies, and ask yourself the following:
What genre am I going to write?How long is my manuscript going to be?How much time do I have to write each week, each day?Where and what formats do I want to publish in? What is my marketing strategy?
You can download this handy worksheet to help you set up your production timeline.
Create Your Production Schedule
Be on your way to making a living at your writing!
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For those of you who know exactly what you want to write bravo. For those like me who want to write lots of different things, this first question might be harder.
Knowing the book genre you’re writing will help you to determine the second question because different genres run different lengths. If your plan is to write a historical romance those will typically run 80,000-100,000 words. If you’re writing a cozy mystery, those will be more like 40,000-60,000. These are just estimates but keep in mind, every additional word you write will require more time. Not only to write but to edit (the dreading editing).
Once you’ve decided your genre and approximate length you need to determine how much you can write each day and that will be dependent on how much time you have. I can’t stress enough DO NOT over-commit yourself as you will set yourself up for frustration and failure. Not to mention a huge amount of stress.
If you only have an hour to write each day and you can typically churn out 500 words in an hour then use that as your baseline. If you can only manage writing 5 days a week then aim for a goal of 2500 words a week. And 5 days a week is respectable.
I used to be able to write 7 days a week, and I loved it because I don’t usually look at my writing as work. However, as my kids got older and I took on more chauffeuring responsibilities I find that a 6 day work week is much better for me. Saturdays are filled with so many activities I need a day off. Not from writing but from the stress when I can’t find a long enough stretch to write. It was too much pressure and made me unhappy. And an unhappy me is a poor writer. If I’m not mentally in a good place, it makes writing that much harder which then itself is frustrating and on and on.
I still work Saturdays on social media and things I can get done 10 minutes here and 15 minutes there, and it works for me.
Anyways back to the main topic, not my mental health because that conversation could go on for many blog posts.
Using the answers, you came up with to those 4 questions you can create your timeline. If your goal is to write a 50,000-word cozy mystery and you can average comfortably 2500 words a week, then it will take you 20 weeks to write your book.
The FIRST draft anyway.
Which to me is always the easiest. It’s when I start revising that I find all the inconsistencies and crappy writing and the major work starts.
Until you’ve been through the entire process a few times, it can be more of a guesstimate as to how long your revisions will take. I usually tell new authors to allow the same amount of time for revisions as they did for their first draft which in this case would be another 20 weeks.
It’s not many authors who can write an almost perfect first draft. And if you can kudos to you. You’re awesome! Please teach me.
Now I know what you’re probably thinking. WOW, that’s a long time away and I don’t want to wait that long to publish my book. I know it can seem like a long time away, 40 some odd weeks.
But that’s ok.
It gives you 40 weeks to market. And it’s never too early to start. Marketing your books is just as hard and time-consuming as the writing part, if not harder. The more time you take to build your author platform and build a following the better off you’ll be when your book releases.
Now keep in mind 40 weeks only gets you to a final draft. You then need to factor in editing, which I recommend you do at least twice if not three times. One content and two line editing. Then time for formatting which is the quickest part of the process.
Editing turn around time will largely depend on your editor. I have one who takes 3 weeks to line edit a 50,000-word novel and another who can do a content edit in a week. Then I need time to make my corrections based on their feedback. Again, if this is your first one it will be harder to figure out, but I allow 2 weeks on my end for each round. It usually doesn’t take that long, but I’d rather have too much time than to rush.
In the middle of all this editing fun, you will need to take the time to get your cover and start marketing. If you’re also a graphic designer along with a writer yay for you, this will be easy. If not you will need to research and find a designer who designs covers in your genre and has a look you’re going for.
This isn’t as easy as it sounds. For me, I sometimes don’t know what I want until I see it. And that often brings out many versions I don’t like at all first which can be frustrating for all parties involved in the process.
You don’t want to start the cover process too early because you never know what turn your book may take regardless of what your initial intent was. You want to make sure your storyline is pretty solid. If your man-eating unicorn turns out to be a man-eating fairy then having a mean looking unicorn on the cover won’t make any sense and you’ll waste money having the cover redone.
You also don’t want to start too late because you need to start marketing this awesome book of yours and having a cover helps.
You will see on the worksheet you downloaded that I have the cover and marketing elements worked into the middle of the progression. This is a guide as you need to do what you feel comfortable with.
I encourage you to block out some time on your calendar and put your production plan on paper. Then come back and let me know how it’s going.
The post How to Create Your Self-Publishing Production Schedule appeared first on In Pursuit of Fabulous.

February 15, 2019
Friend Friday – Jami Albright
Today’s Friend Friday Feature is spotlighting author Jami Albright and her novel, Running From a Rock Star.

Buy now on Amazon.
What’s this book about?
She’s a good-girl control freak. He’s a bad boy in need of a clean image. Will these opposites attract or self-destruct?
Scarlett Kelly is the poster child for responsible living. Growing up as the daughter of the town floozy, she’s made it her mission to be the exact opposite of her mother. So when she wakes up naked and hung over in bed with a bad-boy rock star, she bolts immediately. There’s just one problem: Scarlett’s bedmate is her new husband.
Gavin needs to repair his image or his music career will go down the tubes. He’s also just learned he has a son he never knew existed. He needs to settle down, and bribing his new wife to stay married may just fit everything into place.
Scarlett agrees to the ruse to help her family’s financial troubles even though she can hardly control herself around the rock star. As they search for Gavin’s son, will their unlikely matrimony give them exactly what they’ve been missing or send them packing?
Buy now on Amazon.
About Jami Albright…

Jami Albright is a born and raised Texas girl and is the multiple award-winning author of The Brides on the Run series–a fun, sexy, snarky, laugh-out-loud good time. If you don’t snort with laughter, then she hasn’t done her job.
She is also a wife, mother, and an actress/comedian. She used to think she could sing until someone paid her to stop. She took their money and kept on singing.
Jami loves her family, all things Outlander, and puppies make her stupid happy. She can be found on Sundays during football season watching her beloved Houston Texans and trying not to let them break her heart.
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February 8, 2019
FRIEND FRIDAY – Lynn Cahoon
Today’s Friend Friday Feature is spotlighting author Lynn Cahoon and her novel, Corned Beef and Casualties.

Buy today on Amazon – iTunes – Barnes & Noble – Kobo
What’s this book about?
South Cove, California, is celebrating St. Patrick’s Day‚ and there‚ is going
to be a parade of suspects . . .
Jill Gardner’s store, Coffee, Books, and More, is raking in the green as her little coastal town holds a big festival for St. Patrick’s Day. But the locals
aren’t exactly feeling the luck of the Irish, thanks to the rowdy behavior
of some of the tourists who are pouring in.
Then a woman who just visited Jill’s shop is found dead near the shore.
The fireworks display on the beach may have already happened, but the real fireworks have just begun.
About Lynn Cahoon…

Lynn Cahoon is the award-winning author of several NYT and USA Today best-selling cozy mystery series. The Tourist Trap series is set in central coastal California with six holiday novellas releasing in 2018-2019. She also pens the Cat Latimer series available in mass market paperback. Her newest series, the Farm to Fork mystery series, released in 2018. She lives in a small town like the ones she loves to write about with her husband and two fur babies. Sign up for her newsletter at www.lynncahoon.com
Buy today on Amazon – iTunes – Barnes & Noble – Kobo
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February 2, 2019
5 Tips to generate Your next Novel Idea
When people find out I’m a writer I often get asked how do I come up with ideas for my fiction books,
My answer is an emphatic, I don’t know. They just come to me. It’s not like I sit down at my desk and tell myself I’m not leaving until I’ve come up with an idea. Though I often sit at my desk and tell myself, I can’t leave until I’ve figured out what happens next.
The idea is easy. Figuring out how it evolves into a novel, not so much.
When I decided to pursue this writing thing several years ago, the hardest part was settling on ONE idea and seeing it all the way through. I have shiny object syndrome in this respect.
So many books to write, so little time.It also doesn’t help that I’m my most creative when it’s most inopportune.I get tons of ideas when I’m not able to write them down right away, such as at yoga or in the shower. Then I’m faced with the task of remembering them long enough to write them down. And it happens. A twenty-minute shower has probably lost me several best-seller ideas. I like to blame it on age.

The reason I have so many ideas when in these moments is because I’m relaxed and NOT TRYING to think. If you’re struggling with solidifying that one great idea, or you can’t figure out how your idea will work, or you know you have a book in you but just can’t figure out what the story is here are 5 tips that always help me when I’m stuck.
Relax and stop thinking about it. This might seem counterproductive but as I said in the last paragraph it’s when we stop obsessing over a problem that an idea/solution comes to us. Go for a walk or take a nap (my favorite). Then come back refreshed and see where your mind takes you.Get out of your routine. Shake things up. If you usually go to Starbucks to write go to Dunkin Donuts. If you write in black font, try blue (I prefer green). If you type on your laptop, try writing longhand. Something that jars you out of your comfort zone and your slump. If you’re in a rut, you need to do something different even if it’s a tiny change.Read a book or watch a movie that’s in the genre you’re attempting to write. My dissertation chair told me when I was freaking out over finding a new revolutionary idea to write a 200-page paper on that there are few new ideas but rather it’s about finding a different spin on an old idea. It’s the same in fiction. Love stories are all the same. Girl meets boy. Boy breaks her heart. She plots revenge. They make up and live happily ever after. It’s what happens at each of those points that make the story. Watching or reading (I prefer reading) how someone else does it might spark your imagination.Try your hand at free writing. Sometimes we get tied up in our own mind. We want to have the perfect words to put down on paper, and when we can’t think of those perfect words, we do nothing. Tell yourself you are going to write a piece of flash fiction (500 words or less) and then go to Facebook and the first post you see make a story about it. This silly, mindless exercise will get your creative juices flowing, and you never know where that story will take you.Sit and write for your daily scheduled time even if you are just writing a grocery list. Don’t have a daily scheduled time to write? You need one. I’ll be writing about why this is important in a couple weeks. Don’t let yourself off the hook or a day you don’t write will turn into a week, a month. And you don’t want to go there.
Chances are you’re too hard on yourself. Ease up. The idea will come.
What are some ways you get your ideas flowing?
Join the Writing Warriors Collective Facebook community to work on your writing goals!
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February 1, 2019
Friend Friday
Today’s Friend Friday Feature is spotlighting romance author Mimi Flood and her debut title, The Long Weekend.

Buy for Kindle .99 cents or in paperback on Amazon
What’s this book about?
A story about a funeral, family, and falling in love. A lot can happen in just a few days…
Elizabeth “Ellie” Williams has just been dumped.
As if her night couldn’t get any worse, she gets news that forces her to return to her small hometown for the weekend. The quietness of Frelighsburg is a far stretch from the city buzz of Montreal, but it’s not like Ellie’s got much of a choice.
Spending the weekend in her parents’ home, surrounded by memories from her past, it’s no wonder she prefers the company of her neighbor–and high school crush–Devon. With his good looks, his enigmatic personality and his charm he helps Ellie focus on other things…
As the weekend comes to an end, Ellie must decide what exactly she needs to do to make everyone happy and that includes herself. She must face her responsibilities, deal with her feelings about her old hometown and especially, she must try to figure out what she should follow: her mind or her heart.
About Mimi Flood

MIMI FLOOD was raised in and around Montreal. She graduated with distinction from Concordia University, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts, with a major in Film Studies and a minor in Creative Writing. Mimi has been writing since the age of twelve and has no plans to stop any time soon. When she is not immersed in her stories, she spends her days taking care of her two daughters and her husband. They live in Montreal. “The Long Weekend” is her first novel.
Buy for Kindle .99 cents or in paperback on Amazon
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January 30, 2019
Are You Productive or Just Busy?
In today’s ever increasingly crazy world it can be hard to differentiate between being productive not just busy
I’m busy all the freakin time but I’m not productive all the time.
How often do you claim you are just too busy?
I know I used the B-word constantly because I feel like I’m always rushing from one thing to another. If I’m honest with myself much of my busyness is self-inflicted in non-necessary areas. This makes me feel crazed and completely unproductive.
It’s not necessary to make sure I’m caught up with whatever Real Housewives franchise is currently on or that I’m up to date with all my Facebook friends.
It’s like a nervous tic. When I don’t want to do something I find something to do that wastes time. Then when I run out of time to do my task, I cry and whine that I’m so busy.
I’m very skilled at being busy all day with nothing to show for it. I’ve had to learn to refocus myself on what’s important and more importantly hold myself accountable to my job. One downside of working for yourself. No one is riding me to get things done. You have to be self-motivated.

So how do you turn your “busyness” into productivity?
It starts with a to-do list. If it ain’t written down, it ain’t getting done. Now just because I have a list doesn’t automatically mean the tasks will get checked off. But it’s a step in the right direction, and I know I have this list that’s looming over me.
When the tasks are all in my head, it’s not as easy. It can also give the illusion of more to do than you actually have which is more stressful.
The act of writing things down helps me feel more motivated to do something. But past that, how I’ve learned to hold myself accountable to being productive is by tracking my time. My writing is my full-time job, and I need to treat it as such and show up every day ready to work.
I need to be a better employee for myself, even better than I’d treat a regular job because I don’t get paid unless I produce. And sometimes even then that’s a gamble. Being an authorpreneur doesn’t mean a guaranteed paycheck every Friday.
The joys of entrepreneurship
Now I don’t work a traditional 9-5 but each week I block schedule my tasks around all the kids’ activities, working out, and manicures. I couldn’t possibly be productive with unmanicured nails. And I commit to working that time.
When I sit down to work on a specific task, I make a note of when I start and stop. Not every time I go to refill my coffee (which would be impossible to track) but the task in its entirety.
I then track it in my calendar, and each week I add up the hours and divide into my weekly revenue to get the average hourly rate.
Which is super scary sometimes. It’s always best to do this calculation in the evening with a cocktail.
This tracking does several things for me.
1. It makes sure I’m actually working on projects and accomplishing something.
2. It allows me to track how long certain tasks take so I can better plan my time in the future.
3. I am a professional writer who needs to make money to support my family. Tracking my hourly breakdown helps me spot inefficiencies, where I’m putting the wrong emphasis, and where I need to work harder. Also, while calculating my hourly wage can often be depressing, sometimes it’s good and that my friend is a huge motivator.
4. It gives me something to pull out and show all the people who think I play on the computer for a living and say look at this! OK, it’s just my kids who say that, but still.
Being accountable for what you do, or don’t do, is the only way to turn busy into productive. You need to find that internal motivator.
It’s not always easy to make yourself do what you know you should do versus what you want to do, but keep your big picture in mind.
Netflix, as awesome as it is, isn’t going to help your author career.
Now, get to work!
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January 27, 2019
Setting Author Goals to Reach Your Writing Dreams
It’s the time of year where we reflect on what happened in the previous and get excited about setting new author goals and resolutions. Planner sales skyrocket, people, make vision boards, and we’re all excited about what’s to come.
The year ahead has unlimited potential and man we’re going to crush it. We hit Jan 1st, or rather 2nd since we’re recovering on the 1st, ready to kick ass and take names.
All which, statically speaking, last about a month. We get to February, and it’s back to old habits. Then we spend the next 11 months thinking about our author goals but maybe not doing as much as we should.

Does this sound at all familiar? Why does that happen?
I know if I’m honest I set too many goals that I can’t possibly accomplish, or they’re unrealistic. Thus I’m not focused, and my intention to achieve my goals isn’t as strong as it needs to be.
I recently came across a Google doc from 2015 listing my goals for that year. I realized not only did I NOT meet them, but I went on to make the same ones in 2016, and 2017. 2018 was a bust as I wrote here.
It was eye-opening and depressing. When I took a minute to reflect on why I seem to be such a loser, I realized I set goals that I found reasons NOT to be serious about my goals. I was making so many excuses why I couldn’t achieve these goals and then getting upset I wasn’t living the life I wanted.
Definition of insanity anyone.
I’d even been blaming some of those around me for holding me back and who was the real person holding me back?
ME.
Humbling truth. The truth sucks sometimes.
Right then I swore 2019 would be different and started my planning process over the Thanksgiving holiday.
I committed to myself that this year WOULD BE DIFFERENT, I would follow through.
I wouldn’t let excuses get in the way, and 2018 was going to be MY year of success For REALZ this time not for PRETEND like in 2015, 2016, and 2017.
I’ve set my 2019 goals, and this time I mean them. It started with writing them down, which I always do but this time I also wrote my future statement on how my amazing life will be when I hit my goals. I put it in my vision board app from Hay House (it’s free you can get it here), printed it out and put it on the wall in my office. My goal is to read it daily.
CLICK FOR FREE AUTHORS GOALS COURSE!
I spent time breaking down my goals into actions and then smaller tasks until I had an overview for 2018, monthly objectives, and weekly tasks for the first 90 days. Then as each week approaches, I can break them down further into daily tasks.
It was hard and scary. I’ll be honest it’s given me anxiety, but that’s ok. Pushing through fear is something that I must do to make the big things happen in life.
Planning took more time than I anticipated but it’s investment in MY future. My dreams. My life. My Happiness. So totally worth it.
Where are you at with your writing goals? Are they in your head or have you taken the time to put them down on paper?
Are you ready to get serious about building your writing career this year?
Get rid of the excuses.
Banish your fears and set goals to get you to the writing life you want.
So what if you already work 3 jobs and don’t have time.
MAKE TIME! 10 minutes a day is better than no minutes a day.
If you’re ready to make 2019 YOUR YEAR (and I know you are), then you need to stake your claim. Declare your goals and create a plan how to reach them.
If you’re not sure where to start, I can help. Start your writing and self-publishing journey with the FREE Goal Setting for Authors course. This FREE course will help you get focused and intentional about your writing goals.
It’s designed so you can complete it in 5 days but depending on your time frame you can adjust that. Block out a day for yourself and knock it all out or take a few minutes each day to work on it until you’ve got your goals and plans.
Make sure to join the Writing Warriors Collective private Facebook group and share your goals with the rest of us. Telling people is one step to being more committed to your goals.
Don’t you owe it to yourself to pursue your dreams?
How are you going to make 2019 different?
The post Setting Author Goals to Reach Your Writing Dreams appeared first on In Pursuit of Fabulous.

January 25, 2019
Cupids & Crooks a cozy mystery On Sale .99 cents
Presley is thrilled when Cooper surprises her with a trip to an all-inclusive resort in Cabo San Lucas.
Her agenda of no work and all play is ruined when renowned Mexican soap opera star Lucia Vegas turns up dead in the hotel pool—and it’s not an accident.
She can’t help but wonder what’s happened and is compelled to get to the bottom of things. When she meets a reporter named Belinda who tells her the theory that Lucia was just one of a string of murders targeting young actresses, Presley has to find the murderer—vacation or not!
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Purchase on: Amazon Nook iTunesKobo

Purchase on: Amazon Nook iTunes Kobo
The post Cupids & Crooks a cozy mystery On Sale .99 cents appeared first on In Pursuit of Fabulous.

January 10, 2019
Welcome 2019!
Who doesn’t love a new year?
I know I do.
It’s a blank slate. A time where you can set new goals, be excited about the year ahead of you, and more importantly put the past behind you.
Last year I didn’t set goals, as I wrote about in my end of 2018 post, and it was a mistake. The feelings of stress and overwhelm that kept me from setting goals didn’t go away. Probably because I didn’t set any goals to improve my quality of life. Let’s face it. Life won’t get less stressful unless you do something about it. Sitting around watching Netflix, as much fun as it is, isn’t going to make your life better.
If only it did my life would be awesome!
By setting goals this year, I feel I’m already off to a better start!
2019 GoalsSimply my life – I thought a lot about this the last half of 2018, and it is hard to quantify because so many areas in my life are complicated. While not all of them can be simplified many can be. I need to control what I can and not worry about the rest.
Areas, where I need to simplify, are:
Finances – set up everything possible on automatic payment and have money automatically moved into different savings accounts instead of manually transferring it.
Home clutter/organization – 2 years ago I bought a minimalist course and never did it — big shocker. I’m not sure I can ever get my family to that level, but I would like to have a house that’s not consistently a train wreck.
Saying no to adding obligations – This is a big one. JUST SAY NO! I need to stay focused and only spend my time on the things that will get me to where I want to go.

Set boundaries with my kids and myself – my kids have no concept of my work and the time it takes. I hate telling them to leave me alone, or I can’t do something because I have to work, but there needs to be a balance. If I am stressed because they won’t let me get my work done it doesn’t help anyone. Definitely a drawback of working from home.
Write a bucket list of things I want to do with my kids. Specifically with Caden who will graduate from high school in December. He’s so close to leaving me and starting his own life I don’t want to miss out.
Branch out in my fiction writing from mysteries to writing romance/women fiction. I’m updating the covers on a few of my old cozy mysteries, I’m writing 2 more books this year in the Presley mystery series, and I have 3 women fiction/romance books outlined. It will be a busy writing year.
Make Writing Warriors Collective, my author education site, more self-study. I spent so much time last year creating a repository of content, conducting weekly Facebook live events, and doing education webinars.
While I love interacting with fellow writers, it took a lot away from my actual writing. My goal was to be very hands-on like I am in teaching my college courses. But what I found out is the majority don’t want that. I guess it’s not that they don’t want that, but rather they like the idea but don’t have the time for live scheduled things.
While I had a decent membership who signed up for it, they didn’t take advantage of all the live components, and it wasn’t a good use of my time which frustrated me. I am tweaking how it works to make it more manageable for me but also a great resource for my members. #simplify
Lose the 30 lbs I’ve gained in the last 18 months with healthy eating and exercise. If I can manage my stress and overwhelm this will be easier. I love to eat my feelings.
While this is just a high-level overview, I can assure you that I am working on making the goals SMART and that I have realistic and manageable actions to get me to the goals. I may have to cut down on my reality tv watching, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices.
What are your goals for 2019?
The post Welcome 2019! appeared first on In Pursuit of Fabulous.

December 31, 2018
Goodbye 2018
This is my last post for the year. This year was the lowest in 10 years for blog posts and books written. I felt somewhat compelled to say something about 2018 to close it out.
I’m so ready to be done with it.
2018 was a year of….not a whole lot. So don’t expect too much from me about my accomplishments of 2018. If you’re looking for something exciting and inspiring, you’re in the wrong place.
This time last year, for the first time I can remember, I didn’t set goals. I went into 2018 feeling overwhelmed and stressed. I felt setting goals were going to make it worse by putting even more pressure on me.

Since I didn’t set goals, I can’t say for certain if it would have made things worse, but I can tell you it didn’t make things any better. After having the most non-productive year ever I think not setting goals was much worse than the stress setting goals might have been.
At least I learned when I don’t set goals I don’t accomplish anything, and that lack of accomplishment makes me feel horrible.
I ended the year feeling just as overwhelmed and stressed as when I started. Which doesn’t make me happy but it’s over now, and I need to move on.
Though as much as I want to whine and have a pity party about not making any movement forward, there were highlights to the year. I need to remind myself of what is GREAT about 2018.
I launched Writing Warriors Collective my author education site, splitting it away from my lifestyle/author blog. Then in September I gave my lifestyle/author blog a facelift and created more of a focus for the lifestyle aspect of living your most fabulous midlife.
Why you ask?
Back in February, I read Life Reimagined: The Science, Art, and Opportunity of Midlife and it inspired me to delve further into this stage of life I’m in right now.
I’ve struggled the last few years with who I am, and it’s been very unsettling. I used to have a lot of who I was wrapped up in what I did (which I don’t recommend). As my goals professionally changed I had to change. It’s not a bad thing but different. Then add my age, my kids getting older, a second marriage, and thinking more about retirement than what bar I wanted to go to on Saturday really started to impact me. To the point of fear sometimes. It would cause me sleeplessness (sometimes still does).
As I researched the term midlife (not attached to crisis) more and more, it resonated with me. I realized that I needed to embrace this stage of my life, so I didn’t fear it as much. So you’ll be seeing a lot of this topic in 2019.
What else did I do?
I was a chaperone for Sydney’s cheer camp in July. Chaperoning is not my thing. I’m usually the parent who pays the extra fee to get out of chaperoning. However, it was important to her, and in a weak moment, I said I’d do it. And then stressed over it for weeks. I’m just not THAT parent. The nice, fun, crafty, knows all the best snacks parent.
I ended up surprising myself with how awesome I was. Not compared to the other chaperone who was totally a 10 but I was a solid 4, and I’d expected to be more of a 2. The Nutella snack packs were a hit and gained me some chaperone cred.
Will I do it next year? Sydney is already asking, but I’m not so sure. I don’t want to push my luck. I prefer to end on a high.
In August I went to Portugal with my friend Kathy to join a trip my friend Helene, from Helene in Between, was leading and I had the most amazing time. I met so many fantastic women. The trip was marred a little by some family drama back home, of course, it had to happen while I was in another country, but I still had an amazing time. The country was beautiful, the people I was with were beyond my wildest expectation of what being thrown together with strangers would be, and I came away with great memories.
Then right after Thanksgiving, I had cataract surgery. While they were at it, they put in an interocular lens to take my horrible very nearsighted vision to perfect. I’d been looking forward to this surgery for months, but it was a lot rougher than I’d imagined. I’m still having issues which I’ll be discussing more in depth in a post within the next couple weeks. So I’m currently on the fence if this was a positive or negative. I’m hoping I just need to give it a little more time.
While these above-mentioned highlights of 2018 weren’t goals, they were things I am truly grateful for.
At the end of the day or year, as it is, I am undeniably blessed in life. Life’s not perfect, but I certainly can’t complain (even though I do). I have everything I need and more.
I wish you a wonderful and Happy New Year!
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