Rob Smyth's Blog, page 111

June 14, 2020

Real Madrid 3-1 Eibar: La Liga – as it happened

Toni Kroos, Sergio Ramos and Marcelo scored excellent first-half goals to give Real Madrid a comfortable victory on their return to La Liga action

8.23pm BST

Peep peep! Real Madrid return to action with a comfortable victory at the Alfredo Di Stefano Stadium. They were a long way from their best in general play, but some clinical finishing put them 3-0 up at half-time. The rest was a formality.

8.20pm BST

90 min Four minutes of added time.

8.17pm BST

88 min Both teams look ready to go home.

8.13pm BST

84 min Real’s final change: Fede Valverde replaces Luka Modric.

8.11pm BST

82 min The match is starting to peter out. It’s been a decent effort from Eibar, who could easily have turned it in when they were 3-0 down at half-time.

8.09pm BST

81 min The Eibar coach, Jose Luis Mendilibar, has been booked for dissent.

8.07pm BST

78 min Eibar make another change, with Takashi Inui replacing De Blasis.

8.05pm BST

76 min Time for a drinks break, or a cooling break as they are officially known.

8.05pm BST

74 min Oliveira flicks a header wide from the edge of the box. Eibar are the better team at the moment. Real are either tired, bored or both.

8.02pm BST

73 min Casemiro, who has been booked, looks across nervously after a foul on Correa. He gets away with it, and he’s a bit fortunate to do so.

7.59pm BST

70 min Pedro Leon drives a brilliant cross that fizzes right across the face of goal.

7.58pm BST

69 min: Great chance for Eibar! Pedro Leon, against his old club, is put through on goal but shoots too close to Courtois, who makes a smart save down to his right.

7.57pm BST

68 min A second Eibar goal would make this interesting, because Real already look like they are waiting to hear the final whistle.

7.55pm BST

66 min There’s a break in play while Marcelo receives treatment.

7.52pm BST

62 min Real make a triple substitution: Bale, Eder Militao and Vinicius Jr. replace Rodrygo, Ramos and Hazard.

7.51pm BST

Eibar pull one back! It came from a right-wing corner, which was half cleared to the edge of the area. Exposito’s shot took a big deflection off Rodrygo before hitting the back of his team-mate Bigas and slithering through Courtois.

7.48pm BST

58 min: Sergi Enrich hits the bar with his first touch! It was a really good effort, a flicked header at the near post from a left-wing corner, and it smacked off the bar.

7.47pm BST

57 min A triple change for Eibar: Sergi Enrich, Pedro Leon and Pedro Bigas replace Kike, Rafa and Orellana.

7.46pm BST

57 min Exposito hits a stinging shot from 25 yards that is palmed away spectacularly by Courtois, leaping to his right. That was a terrific save.

7.44pm BST

54 min After a slow start, Hazard looks like he is enjoying himself. He has been more relaxed since setting up the second goal for Sergio Ramos.

7.41pm BST

51 min “Hi Rob,” says Alberto Tobias. “The x in EIbar’s crest is a cross of Saint Andrew. It features on the flag of the city of Eibar, since St. Andrew is their patron saint. The more you know... PS: curious as to what you think of the CGI crowd and crowd noise.”

Despite myself, I like it. I still worry about somebody pressing the wrong button and accidentally causing an international incident, but so far I think it has worked really well. So well, in fact, that I’d forgotten all about it until your email. How about you?

7.39pm BST

49 min A chance for Eibar. Courtois’s poor kick goes straight to de Blasis on the edge of the area. He pushes it inside to Exposito, whose curling shot is pushed away by the diving Courtois. Decent save.

7.36pm BST

47 min Casemiro is booked for a foul on Exposito.

7.34pm BST

46 min Peep peep! Eibar begin the second half. Real Madrid have made a change, with Ferland Mendy on for Dani Carvajal at right-back.

7.18pm BST

In other news, this is really good

EPISODE 2 - CURTAIN UP

Host: .@thatmarkgodfrey
Guests: @simon22ph @ionutlupescu68 @Marcotti

June 9th, 1990. UAE v Colombia, USSR v Romania, Italy v Austria.

- The upheaval for the Romanians with Ioan Lupescu
- Italian expectations with Gab Marcottihttps://t.co/e6enxdSQCc

7.18pm BST

Half-time reading

7.18pm BST

Peep peep! Dmitrovic makes a sprawling save from Rodrygo, and that’s the last touch of the half. Real Madrid are cruising to victory on their return to association football action. The three goals, scored by Kroos, Ramos and Marcelo, were all excellent, and there could a few more in the second half.

7.11pm BST

40 min Real’s next game is a peedie bit tasty: Valencia at home on Thursday. Barcelona host Leganes on Tuesday.

7.08pm BST

Goodnight. Marcelo has made it 3-0 with a cracking finish. Hazard’s shot was beaten away by Dmitrovic, but Eibar couldn’t clear properly and the ball ran towards Marcelo on the edge of the area. He charged onto it and smashed a fine shot into the bottom corner.

7.05pm BST

34 min Exposito’s long-range shot is comfortably held by Courtois.

7.02pm BST

32 min Time for a drinks break.

7.01pm BST

A superb counter-attack from Real, started and finished by Sergio Ramos. He won the ball deep in his own half, gave it to Benzema on the left and kept running. Benzema moved infield and played a devastating angled pass to put Hazard through on goal. He could have scored himself but tapped the ball square for Ramos to hammer it gleefully into the open net.

6.59pm BST

30 min Orellana’s snapshot from 20 yards is blocked by Varane.

6.59pm BST

29 min Hazard and Rodrygo have swapped wings in an attempt to make something happen.

6.58pm BST

28 min Real’s passing has been a bit sharper in the last few minutes, with Modric particularly influential.

6.55pm BST

25 min Hazard hasn’t been great so far. He looks like he’s trying too hard to impress, which is understandable in the circumstances.

6.54pm BST

24 min Rafa is fortunate not to be booked for pulling back Rodrygo.

6.53pm BST

23 min Eibar are having an even share of this game, and the next goal feels like a big one. If Real get it, they will probably win 48-0. But if Eibar equalise, all bets are off.

6.51pm BST

21 min The teenager Rodrygo has his first run down the right, beating Rafa before being dispossessed by Exposito.

6.47pm BST

17 min Modric overhits an attempted through ball to Hazard. Real look a bit rusty in attack, as you’d expect.

6.45pm BST

15 min A half chance for Eibar. De Blasis forces the ball back from the byline towards Kike, who shoots over under pressure from Carvajal. Kike thought he was fouled, and he might have a point, but there’s no VAR intervention.

6.42pm BST

12 min Cristoforo’s long-range shot is saved comfortably by Courtois.

6.40pm BST

10 min Eibar have responded well to going behind, with a couple of promising attacks. They are quite aggressive without the ball, too.

6.38pm BST

7 min Kike falls over in the area after a tackle from Casemiro. He took the ball cleanly, so there’s nothing to see here.

6.35pm BST

GOAL GIVEN! Real Madrid 1-0 Eibar Hmm, I’d like to see that again.

6.34pm BST

VAR watch Benzema looked offside in the build-up, so this may be disallowed.

6.34pm BST

That didn’t take long. Toni Kroos has given Real the lead with a spectacular goal! Benzema tried to wriggle into the area from the left and was tackled. The ball ran loose towards Kroos on the edge of the box, and he opened his body to sidefoot a nonchalant shot that flew over Dmitrovic and into the far corner.

6.33pm BST

3 min A slow start to the game, with lots of Real possession in deep positions.

6.31pm BST

2 min “Hi Rob,” says Peter Oh. “Cool little spare stadium Real Madrid have got there! Zidane was coach of the B team before stepping into the top job, so this is a sort of homecoming for him, isn’t it? Eibar’s crest is interesting. I wonder what the story behind the red x is. I like the stylistic simplicity of it, but it doesn’t exactly exude confidence in penalty shootout situations, does it?”

6.30pm BST

1 min Peep peep! Real, in white, kick off from left to right. Eibar are wearing red and blue stripes.

5.46pm BST

Pre-match reading

5.36pm BST

Real Madrid (4-3-3) Courtois; Carvajal, Varane, Sergio Ramos, Marcelo; Modric, Casemiro, Kroos; Rodrygo, Benzema, Hazard.
Substitutes: Eder Militao, Brahim Diaz, Isco, Bale, James, Javier Hernandez, Vinicius Jr., Areola, Valverde, Mendy, Diego Suarez, Asensio.

Eibar (4-3-3) Dmitrovic; Correa, P Oliveira, Arbilla, Rafa Soares; Cristoforo, S Alvarez, Exposito; Orellana, Kike, De Blasis.
Substitutes: Yoel, Diop, Pedro Leon, Burgos, Jose Angel, Bigas, Quique Glez, Tejero, Sergio Cubero, Charles, Enrich, Inui.

3.28pm BST

Hello and welcome to live coverage of Real Madrid v Eibar from Not The Bernabeu. The home of the white handkerchief is being renovated, so Real will play at the cosy Alfredo Di Stefano Stadium - usually reserved for Real Madrid Castilla - for the rest of the season.

This is Real’s first game since the extended spring break, but they can’t afford to ease their way back into action. They lost the last match before the break, a surprise 2-1 defeat at Betis. And With Barcelona five points clear after defiling Mallorca 4-0 last night, it’s pretty much a must-win game.

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Published on June 14, 2020 12:23

June 9, 2020

Abraham Klein, the 'master of the whistle': part two – podcast

The best stories from the beautiful game that you may never have heard before, written by some of the world’s leading sports journalists, and spanning more than 100 years of sporting history from across the footballing planet.

In this episode: the concluding part of a two-part feature-length story about how the little Israeli Abraham Klein survived politics, prejudice and even the Holocaust to become the best referee in the world (listen to part one)

Read the text version here.

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Published on June 09, 2020 21:00

The Fiver | Saarbrücken bid to land a fifth beauty on Goliath’s confused noggin

Who fancies a bit of romance? Don’t worry, The Fiver isn’t suggesting a bit of Va-Va-Zoom to enliven Tuesday night. We’re talking about romance of the fußball variety. On Tuesday night, FC Saarbrücken have the chance to become the first fourth-tier team to ever reach the German Cup final. So far, so feelgood. There are a couple of catches, though. The first is that they have to beat an excellent Bayer Leverkusen side; the second is that they will be playing their first game in more than three months, so their match fitness could leave a soupçon to be desired.

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Published on June 09, 2020 08:30

June 8, 2020

The Fiver | Wedges, thin ends and the capacity for cringeworthiness

Like all liberal, progressive, often insufferable culture-signalling tea-time emails, The Fiver likes to advertise the fact we watch David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive at least once a month. Please, reader, don’t tell us you haven’t seen it? It is as brilliant and disquieting as anything Lynch has ever done. It is psychotically lucid, oppressively strange, but with a powerfully er0tic and humanly intimate dimension that Lynch never quite achieved elsewhere. It is a fantasia of illusion and identi … [Hang on, have you nicked that from Peter Bradshaw’s review? – Fiver Ed].

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Published on June 08, 2020 08:06

June 2, 2020

Abraham Klein, the 'master of the whistle': part one – podcast

In this episode: the first of a two-part feature-length story about how the little Israeli Abraham Klein survived politics, prejudice and even the Holocaust to become the best referee in the world

Read the text version here.

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Published on June 02, 2020 21:00

Football quiz: when Barcelona won the Champions League final in 2006

Arsenal reached their first (and so far only) Champions League final in 2006. How well do you recall the game?

More Champions League final quizzes: 1999, 2005, 2012

Where was the final played?

Athens

Paris

Rome

Amsterdam

Arsenal kept a staggering 10 consecutive clean sheets on their way to the final. Who started at left-back in their six knockout games against Real Madrid, Juventus and Villarreal?

Ashley Cole

Gaël Clichy

Kolo Touré

Mathieu Flamini

Whose free-kick was headed in by Sol Campbell to give Arsenal the lead?

Alexander Hleb

Cesc Fàbregas

Gilberto Silva

Thierry Henry

How many future Barcelona players were in the Arsenal starting XI for the final?

One

Two

Three

Four

Jens Lehmann was sent off after 18 minutes for fouling which Barcelona player?

Samuel Eto’o

Ronaldinho

Ludovic Giuly

Deco

How many Thierry Henry shots did Víctor Valdés save?

None

One

Three

Five

In his final game for the club, at the age of 34, Henrik Larsson set up both Barcelona goals. Which team did he join that summer?

Manchester United

IFK Gothenburg

Hogaborgs BK

Helsingborgs IF

The first two substitutes used by Arsenal were Manuel Almunia and Mathieu Flamini. Who else came off the bench?

Robin van Persie

José Antonio Reyes

Dennis Bergkamp

Gaël Clichy

Who scored Barcelona’s winning goal?

Samuel Eto'o

Oleguer Presas

Juliano Belletti

Ludovic Giuly

How many of Barcelona’s Little Mix – Lionel Messi, Andrés Iniesta and Xavi – started the game?

None

One

Two

Three

1 and above.

Champions League? You're having a laugh

2 and above.

Champions League? You're having a laugh

3 and above.

Champions League? You're having a laugh

4 and above.

You made it to the final, but were well beaten

5 and above.

You made it to the final, but were well beaten

6 and above.

A fine effort

7 and above.

A superb effort

8 and above.

A superb score

9 and above.

A superb score

0 and above.

Champions League? You're having a laugh

10 and above.

Pep, is that you?

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Published on June 02, 2020 02:33

June 1, 2020

The Fiver | A steel-jacketed dose of perspective right up its elite pathway

The Fiver has a dream. In it, the death of almost 400,000 people during a global pandemic leaves all survivors the gift of epiphany, after which they vow to give up public displays of vainglory. Oh, Fiver! Oh, Fiver! If anything, Covid-19 has increased participation in the nation’s favourite sport, the self. The lack of physical contact has created a blizzard of new opportunities to demonstrate the essential irrelevance of every other living thing. You don’t even have to wait for your turn to speak, or for your brain to boot up, like you did before lockdown. Alehouse inanity at digital speed!

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Published on June 01, 2020 08:56

May 31, 2020

Paderborn 1-6 Borussia Dortmund: Bundesliga – as it happened

Jadon Sancho scored a hat-trick, and was booked for revealing a ‘Justice for George Floyd’ T-shirt, as Dortmund scored six times in the second half at Paderborn

7.06pm BST

6.52pm BST

Peep peep! Dortmund consolidate second place with an ultimately crushing victory over the bottom club Paderborn. It was 0-0 at half-time, but Dortmund upped their game to devastating effect after the break. Jadon Sancho scored a hat-trick on his return to the starting XI, and was booked for revealing a ‘Justice for George Floyd’ T-shirt when he scored his first goal. He was ever so impressive, as were Dortmund once they got into their stride. Thanks for your company, goodnight!

6.49pm BST

A hat-trick for Jadon Sancho on his return to the side! Dortmund broke two on one, with Snacho on the ball. He could have given the goal to Hazard but decided, as you would, to take the hat-trick himself with a cool finish. He is seriously good, you know.

6.47pm BST

It’s 5-1 now! Witsel’s low cross from the right is bundled into the net from six yards by Marcel Schmelzer, who has had a whale of a time since coming on as substitute.

6.46pm BST

88 min Paderborn look shattered. Zingerle keeps the score vaguely respectable with a quite brilliant fingertip save to divert Reyna’s low drive past the post.

6.44pm BST

86 min Dortmund make their last substitutions. Leonardo Balerdi and Mateu Morey replace Can and Hakimi.

6.44pm BST

Hakimi gets the fourth with a fine finish. It was set up by the other wing-back Schmelzer, who picked up a loose ball and ran across the edge of the area before finding Hakimi. He did the rest with an emphatic low drive into the far corner.

6.41pm BST

83 min More changes for Paderborn. Abdelhamid Sabiri and Dennis Jastrzembski replace Vasiliadis and Antwi-Adjei.

6.39pm BST

82 min Drager is booked for a late tackle on Reyna.

6.38pm BST

80 min The match is petering out. Two more changes for Dortmund, with the teenager Gio Reyna and the not-so-teenage Marcel Schmelzer replacing Brandt and Guerreiro.

6.34pm BST

76 min A third change for Padernborn, with Kai Proger replacing the impressive Holtmann. His first contribution is a volley on the run that is blocked on the edge of the area by a Dortmund defender.

6.33pm BST

76 min Hummels is booked for a foul on Zolinski.

6.32pm BST

Sancho restores Dortmund’s two-goal lead straight away. Hazard’s cutback evaded the wrongfooted Strohdiek, and Sancho shifted the ball onto his left foot before thrashing a rising drive through the left hand of the diving Zingerle. That was a really good finish from Sancho. No T-shirt celebration this time.

6.30pm BST

Hunemeier smacks the penalty into the net, high to his left. Burki went the right way, and I think he got a slight touch, but it was high enough that he couldn’t properly reach it. Excellent penalty.

6.28pm BST

70 min: PENALTY TO PADERBORN! Can has been penalised for handball after throwing himself in front of Drager’s shot. It hit him on the elbow, which was tight to his body. Under the new laws it was probably a penalty. Can is also booked, either for the handball or dissent.

6.27pm BST

69 min Lovely play from Dortmund. Hakimi, Hazard and Brandt combine to tee up Can, whose sidefooted shot from 20 yards is saved by the tumbling Zingerle.

6.26pm BST

69 min A change for Dortmund: Axel Witsel replaces Thomas Delaney.

6.25pm BST

68 min After a frustrating first half, Dortmund are cruising to victory. Their next match is a cracker at home to in-form Hertha Berlin on Saturday.

6.23pm BST

65 min A double change for Paderborn: Ben Zolinski and Sven Michel replace Srbeny and Mamba.

6.19pm BST

62 min: Srbeny has a goal disallowed for offside. No complaints from Paderborn; he was well past the last defender.

6.18pm BST

61 min Can’s cutback flashes across the face of goal. Dortmund have been terrific since half-time.

6.17pm BST

58 min Sancho was booked for his celebration. I’m not sure whether that’s because he took his top off or because he had a political message on his T-shirt.

After Marcus Thuram took a knee earlier, Jadon Sancho celebrates scoring against Paderborn. pic.twitter.com/zQxfqg8Kg8

6.16pm BST

Jadon Sancho scores the second. It was made majestically by Brandt, whose excellent first touch allowed him to surge into the area and slide the ball across to give Sancho an open goal. Sancho celebrated by taking off his shirt to reveal a T-shirt that says ‘Justice for George Floyd’.

6.13pm BST

56 min “How’s it going, Rob?” says Liz White. “What are your thoughts on Bayern’s goal celebration music yesterday?”

Oh, I didn’t notice it. Was it Perfume Genius?

6.12pm BST

It’s been coming since half-time. It was a decent move from Dortmund, starting with a raking crossfield pass finds Guerreiro on the left. He played in the underlapping Can, who surged past his man and crossed towards the near post. Zingerle fumbled it straight at the feet of Hazard, who scored from five yards.

6.10pm BST

52 min: Another chance for Dortmund! Brandt finds the overlapping (and possibly offside) Sancho on the right, and his excellent low cross is flicked wide from eight yards by Hazard. He should have scored.

6.08pm BST

49 min: Fine save from Zingerle! Now a big chance at the other end. Guerreiro’s low cross is miscontrolled by Sancho and then dummied superbly by Can. It runs across the area to Hakimi, whose low shot is diverted wide by the outstretched leg of Ziegler. Brilliant save, that. The resulting corner is headed onto the roof of the net by Hummels.

6.07pm BST

48 min: So close for Paderborn! Holtmann drags a dangerous low cross from the left that just evades both Mamba and Antwi-Adjei, waiting in front of an open goal.

6.03pm BST

47 min Apparently there was only one foul in the first half, which is kind of astonishing.

6.03pm BST

46 min Peep peep! Dortmund begin the second half, oh yes they do.

5.53pm BST

Half-time reading

5.46pm BST

A job well done by the bottom club Paderborn, whose diligent defending has restricted Dortmund to unclear chances. See you in 10 minutes for the second half.

5.45pm BST

45 min: Good chance for Brandt! Hakimi surges into space down the right and slides the ball towards Sancho on the edge of the area. He lets it run beautifully to Brandt, who whacks it miles over the bar. Decent chance, that.

5.44pm BST

44 min Can screams with frustration after blootering the ball into orbit from the edge of the area. Dortmund look increasingly irritated with Paderborn’s refusal to roll over.

5.43pm BST

43 min “Hey Rob,” says JR in Illinois. “Is there any word on whether or not the upcoming Premier League games will be broadcast with fake crowd noise? Although we have much, much, much. much, much, much bigger problems in the world I really am opposed to the fake noise. Aside from the fact that I prefer real things to not be purposefully misrepresented it’s very distracting because all I can think while I’m watching now is ‘That crowd noise isn’t really happening.’”

I think the Premier League are planning to use the same ambient backdrop as before lockdown.

5.41pm BST

41 min Another good break from Paderborn. Holtmann plays the ball out to the overlapping Antwi-Adjei, who cracks over from a tight angle. Burki had it covered, though it was a decent strike.

5.38pm BST

39 min Dortmund work the ball from left to right before Hakimi’s low cross flashes across the face of goal.

5.36pm BST

36 min The stretching Strohdiek shanks a clearance behind for another Dortmund. Hazard swings it deep towards Can, who heads wide under pressure.

5.34pm BST

34 min Dortmund are looking increasingly dangerous. Paderborn have defended excellently so far, but it’ll be hard to do this for 90 minutes.

5.30pm BST

30 min: Chance for Hazard! Strohdiek’s backheader falls short of the keeper Zingerle. Hazard gets to it first and tries to cushion it past Zingerle, who dives to his right to make a vital block.

5.28pm BST

29 min Holtmann’s long-range shot ends up somewhere near Amsterdam. Told you he was a good player.

5.27pm BST

26 min: Just wide from Guerreiro! A rare opportunity to counter-attack allows Dortmund to finally find some space. Sancho and Brandt combined nicely to set up Guerreiro, whose fierce low shot beats the keeper Zingerle before hitting Collins on the line and deflecting just wide of the far post! I don’t know how much Collins knew about it, but it was a goalsaving touch.

5.23pm BST

22 min Gerrit Holtmann, on the left of midfield for Paderborn, looks a decent player - fast, aggressive and with good awareness of the available passing options.

5.20pm BST

20 min Dortmund are starting to dominate possession, with Sancho increasingly influential. Paderborn look a real threat on the break, though.

5.17pm BST

17 min: Good save from Zingerle! Dortmund’s first chance falls to Hazard, who runs onto a long pass down the inside-right channel from Piszczeck and spanks a half-volley that is blocked at the near post by Zingerle.

5.15pm BST

15 min You’d expect Dortmund’s class to tell eventually, but at the moment Paderborn are the better - and the hungrier - team.

5.14pm BST

13 min Another crisp, economical counter-attack from Paderborn ends with Antwi-Adjei whacking over the bar from the edge of the box. It was a reasonable opportunity, if not as good as his first a couple of minutes ago.

5.11pm BST

11 min: Chance for Paderborn! That was a terrific counter-attack. Holtmann won the ball on the edge of the area before surging into space and eventually over the halfway line. Holtmann, Mamby and Srbeny then moved the ball across the field to find Antwi-Adjei in space on the right side of the box, but his low drive went well wide of the far post.

5.09pm BST

10 min Nothing much to report. I’m not sure Sancho has touched the ball yet.

5.07pm BST

7 min Paderborn have had plenty of the ball in the early minutes.

5.04pm BST

4 min Can’s low cross from the right is screwed behind for a corner by Drager, who looked on nervously as the ball whistled past the far post.

5.03pm BST

3 min It’s been a lively start from Paderborn, who are in reasonable form: they’ve drawn all three games since the restart.

5.00pm BST

1 min Peep peep! Paderborn kick off from right to left. They are in blue; Dortmund are wearing yellow.

4.35pm BST

The return match, in November, was bizarro entertainment: Paderborn led 3-0 at half-time before Dortmund came back to draw.

4.33pm BST

4.27pm BST

Pre-match reading

4.22pm BST

Gladbach 4-1 Union Berlin is the final score in the early game. They move up to third, and the race for Champions League places is hella tight.

4.07pm BST

Jadon Sancho starts for Dortmund for the first time since spring break. It looks as if, in the absence of Erling Haaland, Thorgan Hazard will play as a duplicitious nine.

SC Paderborn 07 (4-1-4-1) Zingerle; Drager, Strohdiek, Hunemeier, Collins; Schonlau; Antwi-Adjei, Vasiliadis, Srbeny, Holtmann; Mamba.
Substitutes: Huth, Jans, Ritter, Proger, Sabiri, Evans, Michel, Zolinski, Jastrzembski.

12.42pm BST

Hello. That low squeak you’ve been hearing since Tuesday night is the air coming out of Borussia Dortmund’s season. The 1-0 defeat to Bayern Munich ended their title hopes at a stroke, and now all they have to play for is the usual Champions League place. It’s quite a comedown for a team that has spent much of the the season dreaming of a first Championship since 2012. If they hadn’t seen such riches, they could live with being poor.

The fight for those Champions League places is seriously tight. If Gladbach beat Union Berlin in the early game - they lead 3-1 after 70 minutes - there will be only two points separating Dortmund in second and Leipzig in fifth. Dortmund have a pretty good run-in, though, with three of their last six games against teams in the bottom four.

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Published on May 31, 2020 10:52

May 27, 2020

Jeff Hall: the footballer whose death turned the tide against polio – podcast

In this episode: it took the sudden passing of the 29-year-old England right-back in 1959 to get a generation pouring into clinics for inoculation against polio, a disease that in the previous 10 years had killed over 3,000 people in England and Wales

Read the text version here

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Published on May 27, 2020 01:01

May 26, 2020

Borussia Dortmund 0-1 Bayern Munich: Bundesliga's Klassiker – as it happened

Joshua Kimmich’s delicious chip gave Bayern a hard-fought win that moved them seven points clear at the top with only six games remaining

7.43pm BST

7.22pm BST

That’s it! Bayern move seven points clear with a hard-fought win in Der Klassiker. There wasn’t much in it, but Bayern had a bit more assurance and a lot more authority than Dortmund. The outstanding Joshua Kimmich won the game with a delicious chip just before half-time, though Dortmund’s keeper Roman Burki will probably feel he should have done better.

It won’t be confirmed until June, but trust me, Bayern have won their eighth consecutive Bundesliga title. Based on their performances since Christmas, they are a decent bet for a sixth European Cup as well. Thanks for your company, goodnight!

7.19pm BST

90+1 min Lewandowski appeals unsuccessfully for a penalty after being eased off the ball by Hakimi.

7.18pm BST

90 min Three minutes of added time. Dortmund look resigned to defeat.

7.17pm BST

89 min Muller’s close-range volley is brilliantly blocked by Guerreiro.

7.15pm BST

88 min It’s now or next season for Dortmund.

7.15pm BST

87 min Another Bayern change: Gnabry off, Javi Martinez on.

7.14pm BST

86 min Ah, ignore me: Dortmund made two of their changes at half-time, which doesn’t count as one of their three blocks.

7.13pm BST

85 min Witsel does come on to replace Dahoud, and Lucas Hernandez replaces Boateng for Bayern. I’m not sure Witsel should be allowed on the pitch, but I suppose he’s acting with integrity.

7.12pm BST

84 min Dortmund are preparing to bring on a fifth substitute, Axel Witsel. I thought substitutes had to be made in three blocks; if so, Dortmund have already used theirs.

7.11pm BST

83 min: Lewandowski hits the post! Bayern were inches away from the title. He ran to the edge of the D and shaped a left-footed curler that took a nick off Hummels, beat the diving Burki and rebounded off the far post.

7.09pm BST

81 min “I am a ‘neutral’, but my son’s support of Dortmund is quite intense,” says Jake Shaffer. “While I lapped up the beauty of Kimmich’s finish, my son couldn’t see anything except all the mistakes Dortmund made that lead up to the goal. Got me thinking: is it better to see a goal against your club as a breakdown of game fundamentals OR to see a goal as a piece of one-time magic woven by the other team? I realise the truth is in the grey area inbetween, but when has truth ever inconvenienced a diehard football supporter?”

It’s a good point, this. One of my favourite goals against Manchester United was Gabriel Batistuta’s preposterous screamer in 2000. It was years before I realised that, while it did swerve, it was essentially straight at Mark Bosnich.

7.09pm BST

80 min Dahoud’s fierce shot from 20 yards is beaten away by the falling Neuer. He almost moved too far across his line but was able to reach up and slap it away from goal.

7.08pm BST

80 min Dortmund make their final change: former Bayern player Mario Gotze, who will be leaving Dortmund at the end of the season, replaces Piszczek.

7.07pm BST

79 min Hakimi’s low cross is cleared at the near post by Alaba. This is Dortmund’s best spell since the first 15 minutes of the game.

7.05pm BST

77 min Sancho has adjusted to the pace of the game and looks like Dortmund’s biggest threat. He starts a good move that leads to Hazard missing a great chance from six yards, though he was miles offside so it would have been VARed.

7.03pm BST

75 min Guerreiro smacks the free-kick straight into the loving embrace of Manuel Neuer.

7.02pm BST

74 min Davies is booked for a foul on Reyna, 22 yards from goal. Bayern are fuming because Davies did get something on the ball.

7.01pm BST

73 min Bayern make a change: Ivan Perisic replaces Coman.

7.01pm BST

73 min Piszczek, who has had a fine game, makes a vital interception at the near post to deny Pavard.

7.00pm BST

72 min A Dortmund change: Giovanni Reyna replaces Haaland, who is limping round towards the bench. It’s been a chastening night for him.

6.59pm BST

71 min Sancho finds a bit of space down the left for the first time. He teases Boateng and curls a dangerous ball that flashes across the face of goal and behind for a goalkick. Neuer let it go, in fairness.

6.57pm BST

69 min Can’s long-range shot is blocked on the edge of the area. Dortmund are having more of the game now, though there’s often a lack of conviction in their attacing play. The wing-backs, Guerreiro and Hakimi, have played well; the front three have not.

6.56pm BST

68 min “I know you’re joking about Haaland,” says Niall Mullen, “but I do love a flat track bully.”

6.55pm BST

67 min Dahoud is booked for a lunge at Kimmich, who punches the ground in pain. Dahoud won the ball on the stretch and then followed through into Kimmich’s ankle. Replays show that it was quite clearly a fair tackle/yellow card/red card offence.

6.54pm BST

66 min Muller is booked for a late tackle on Akanji. The first part of the second half has flown by, and all of a sudden Bayern are 24 minutes away from a seven-point lead.

6.50pm BST

62 min Corner to Dortmund. Nothing comes of it, but this is a better spell for Dortmund.

6.49pm BST

60 min “I’m sure I’m among the many responding to Woolie Madden,” says Martin Wiele. “Canada is one of the host nations for World Cup 2026 meaning Alphonso Davies will very likely get his World Cup appearance (as brief as Canada’s stay in the tournament may be...)”

Oh lordy, I’d forgotten about that as well. But I acted with integrity when I responded to Woolie’s email, and I was trying to limit the spread of my ignorance.

6.48pm BST

58 min Haaland’s shot deflects wide off the arm of Boateng. There’s no VAR check, as far as I’m aware, but that could easily have been a penalty. Boateng was on all fours on the six-yard line when Haaland’s shot hit him on the side of the arm, so goodness knows what that means in terms of unnatural positions. The odd thing is that Dortmund didn’t appeal.

6.45pm BST

58 min Sancho hasn’t been in the game since coming on. Bayern have quietly battered Dortmund since half-time.

6.44pm BST

57 min “Haaland has not been very good has he?” says Stefan Volkmann. “Everything is breaking down when it gets to him. He looks like a clanky robot that needs oiling. He’ll score now of course.”

Let’s just pronounce him a flat-track bully and get it over with.

6.43pm BST

56 min Dortmund need more from Haaland, who has struggled to hold the ball up all night. From memory, he had a similar problem against Liverpool in the Champions League.

6.42pm BST

54 min: Good save from Burki! Two more chances for Bayern. First Burki plunged to his right to palm Goretzka’s low shot away; then Hummels made a vital interception at the near post as Gnabry cut the ball back to Lewandowski.

6.41pm BST

53 min Lewandowski plays a one-two with Muller and belts a 20-yard shot that is well blockled by Hummels. Then Coman’s dangerous cross is palmed away desperately by the diving Burki. Bayern are playing with such authority.

6.40pm BST

53 min “I watched this game for five minutes before it occurred to me that the fan noise was fake,” says Luke Jones. “If you didn’t know the stands were empty, you’d never suspect the noise wasn’t real.”

There’s a mural for that.

6.39pm BST

52 min The next goal is of mighty importance. If Bayern score it, the title race is surely done.

6.38pm BST

51 min Bayern have had the full strut on since half-time. This is looking pretty ominous for Dortmund.

6.37pm BST

49 min Dahoud shoots straight at Neuer from distance.

6.37pm BST

49 min “Daniel Sturridge with an underrated entry into greatest edge-of-the-box chips here,” says Niall Mullen.

He has a helluva portfolio of goals, that lad. At some stage in the next few years, some pompous arse is going to write a 10,000-word piece lamenting his lost talent; probably me.

6.35pm BST

47 min Pavard clips a fine pass over Akanji to release Coman down the right. He has Lewandowski unmarked in the middle but overhits his cross. Dortmund got away with one there.

6.34pm BST

47 min “Hello Rob,” says Woolie Madden. “What a fine day for a bit of association football. The Haaland vs Davies battle is great. The future of football represented right there - but it’s quite possible, even probable, that we won’t see either play in a World Cup.”

You say that, but Norway and Canada might make it to Gianni Infantino’s 256-team tournament in 2030.

6.33pm BST

46 min Peep peep! Bayern begin the second half. Dortmund have made a double change: Jadon Sancho and Emre Can replace Julian Brandt and Thomas Delaney.

6.21pm BST

“Keeper, surely?” says Niall Mullen.

Yeah, the more I see it the more I think he should have saved it. But anyone who isn’t a sucker for a disguised chip from a diminutive midfield player is an enemy of life.

6.19pm BST

Peep peep! Bayern are 45 minutes away from a seven-point lead - and an eighth straight championship. Joshua Kimmich’s delicious chip gave Bayern the lead at the end of an intense and intriguing first half; on reflection Roman Burki might have done better, but it was a masterful bit of play from Kimmich. See you in 10 minutes to see whether Dortmund can save the 2019-20 title race.

6.17pm BST

44 min I reckon if Pep Guardiola could clone one player in world football, with a view to having seven or eight of him in Manchester City’s starting XI, it would be Joshua Kimmich.

6.16pm BST

That is pure class. After a long spell of Bayern pressure, Kimmich collected a loose ball 20 yards from goal, looked up and kissed a delightful chip towards goal. The backpeaddling Burki got a good touch on to the ball as he leapt desperately towards his own goal, but it was not strong enough and the ball dropped into the net.

6.14pm BST

Joshua Kimmich gives Bayern the lead with a glorious goal!

6.13pm BST

42 min Goretzka appeals hopefully for a penalty after being eased out of his stride by the arm of Delaney. The referee isn’t interested.

6.12pm BST

41 min Kimmich’s corner from the right bounces dangerously across the area. Dortmund are starting to look a little edgy, and I fear for them if Bayern score first.

6.11pm BST

40 min A right-wing cross is headed away to Goretzka, 30 yards from goal. He waits for the ball to bounce and cuts across a sweet strike that is punched away by Burki. It was close enough to the keeper for it to be a comfortable enough save.

6.10pm BST

39 min Davies beats two players on the edge of the area with a charming little zig-zag. For a second it looks like he’s through, but Hummels comes across to ease him off the ball.

6.09pm BST

39 min “I expect the crowd noise is taken from the second option supplied by Sky Germany,” says Paul. “You can either watch the match and enjoy the deranged shouting of coaches, players etc., or have the background noise of a Dortmund crowd. I liked the old option better where you could tune out the commentator and have the ‘real’ stadium noise as background.”

Shame you can’t do that with liveblogs really.

6.08pm BST

37 min Dortmund have had a lot of success with switches of play, particularly out to Guerreiro on the left.

6.07pm BST

35 min Dahoud plays an excellent pass to find Brandt in space on the right wing. He tries to guide a first-time cross into the space behind the Bayern defence but gets too much on it. Goalkick to Bayern.

6.06pm BST

34 min Lewandowski’s lovely dummy allows Coman’s pass to run through to Muller, but Piszczek comes across to make a fine interception. Despite the lack of clear chances, this is excellent stuff.

6.05pm BST

33 min: Great defending from Davies!Haaland gets away from Alaba and rumbles into the area. He’s about to shoot - and almost certainly score - when Davies appears from nowhere to make a vital interception. Davies’s acceleration is frightening.

6.03pm BST

32 min Another opportunity for Dortmund. Hakimi’s deep cross is headed down by Hummels towards Brandt, who can’t deal with an awkward bounce on the six-yard line. Hummels, as Owen Hargreaves points out on BT Sport, should probably have headed the ball back across goal.

6.02pm BST

30 min Hazard plays a good return pass to Haaland on the left side of the area. He screws a left-footed shot that hits Davies and deflects safely across to the far side. It wasn’t a clean strike from Haaland, who looks frustrated with himself.

6.01pm BST

30 min “The announcers keep talking about hearing everything the players say, yet all I hear is cheering and chanting and singing, that the players can’t hear,” says Joe Pearson. “Also, Dortmund’s passing has been surprisingly sloppy.”

Yes, I thought they started excellently but have made some bad choices in the final third in the last 20 minutes or so.

6.00pm BST

29 min Lewandowski is moving gingerly after a collision with Piszczek. I think he’s okay.

5.59pm BST

28 min Haaland’s attempted scissor kick from the edge of the area slices off the side of his leg. Moments later, Brandt’s dipping cross from the left towards Haaland is superbly headed away by Alaba.

5.58pm BST

26 min A superb tackle from Piszczek on Lewandowski allows Dortmund to break dangerously. Eventually Brandt delays on the edge of the area before finding Dahoud, who can’t decide what to do with the ball and in the end does nothing.

5.57pm BST

25 min “Hi Rob,” says Shafath. “The fake crowd noise is not that bad actually. They seem to be in sync with what is going on in the match and does seem to create a match ‘atmosphere’. Much better than the hollow sound of something being played in the actual stadium.”

The plot thickens. I’ll see if I can find a stream with noise for the Leverkusen game later.

5.55pm BST

24 min Coman’s stinging shot from the right side of the area is beaten away by Burki. Bayern are getting closer. It was a comfortable enough save for Burki, because the angle was so tight, but it was a beautiful strike.

5.54pm BST

23 min “Dear Rob,” says Nelson Kalberer. “The fake fan noises ruin the atmosphere of these games. It’s so obviously fake and just not an accurate portrayal of how the game is played and how it sounds. As someone who wrote a 4,000-word paper on the impact of fans on the pitch, simply putting noises to replicate fans does nothing to the tension of the matches. I’d much prefer to listen to the players shout at each other than fake fan sounds and TV companies should either give an option for fake atmospheres or simply stop using them.”

I suspect I would agree with approximately 100 per cent of your email had I seen (and heard) one of these matches. I don’t see the point.

5.54pm BST

22 min After a slow start, Bayern are starting to look dangerous.

5.52pm BST

19 min: Piszczek clears off the line from Gnabry! It’s 1-1 in goalline clearances. Coman, on the right side of the area, found Gnabry with a speculative cross on the turn. He got the ball out of his feet and drove it low past Burki, but Piszczek kicked it off the line. His anticipation and positioning were immaculate.

5.50pm BST

18 min Dortmund work the ball from right to left and then back again. But then Kimmich nicks the ball with a beautifully judged interception. He’s such a class act.

5.48pm BST

17 min “Hi Rob,” says Matt Burtz. “I’ve missed the MBMs during all the pandemic and this game is a perfect diversion on a Tuesday morning here in the U.S. Personally, I don’t mind the lack of a crowd and the piped-in noise. What say you?”

While I don’t think it’s sustainable, the lack of a crowd been a lot less off-putting than I expected. Maybe that’s because I’m used to watching cricket. I haven’t watched a match with an artificial atmosphere, though, and am not in a hurry to do so.

5.46pm BST

15 min A good spell of possession for Bayern, who are playing more like the home side. Coman ruins it all with an overhit pass to Muller.

5.44pm BST

13 min Hummels is booked for a tactical foul on Coman.

5.44pm BST

12 min Kimmich floats a glorious ball from the left that just evades the leaping Muller on the six-yard line and runs through to Burki. I think Muller might have deliberately left it, presumably in an attempt to dummy Burki. It would have been a touch of genius had it worked; it didn’t.

5.42pm BST

11 min Lewandowski’s cross shot from the edge of the area is comfortably saved by Burki.

5.42pm BST

10 min: Hazard has a goal disallowed for offside. He knew it, in fairness, and there were no complaints. It was Hakimi who was offside in the build-up. There was a big chance just before that, when Haaland’s close-range shot was blocked by Boateng after good play from Hakimi and Hazard. Dortmund look good and have exploited the space behind Alaba and Davies three or four times already.

5.39pm BST

8 min Haaland wins a corner for Dortmund on the right. It’s headed away at the near post.

5.38pm BST

7 min “Is somebody DJ-ing fake crowd noise?” asks Joe Pearson.

I think some TV companies are piping it in, though my BT Sport feed is mercifully free of such silliness.

5.36pm BST

5 min Lewandowski moves into the area and drills a shot that is well blocked by the stretching Hummels. This has been a terrific start.

5.36pm BST

4 min Delaney’s brilliant crossfield pass finds Guerreiro, who knocks it back from the byline towards Brandt on the left edge of the area. He moves the ball onto his right foot and whips a curler that is too close to Neuer, who makes a comfortable save. Lovely play from Dortmund though.

5.34pm BST

3 min It’s been an assured start from Dortmund, with some neat, snappy passing.

5.33pm BST

30 seconds: Boateng clears off the line from Haaland! Crikey, that was almost a sensational start. Neuer came out of his area to beat Hazard to Brandt’s through ball. Haaland picked up the loose ball and slid it through the legs of Neuer with his left foot, but Boateng was waiting on the line to boot it clear.

5.31pm BST

1 min Peep peep! Dortmund, in yellow, kick off from left to right. Bayern are in red. It’s the El Klassiker!

5.30pm BST

The players emerge on a very pleasant evening in Dortmund: 19 degrees, a clear sky and light winds, 2 per cent chance of rain. What more could we want?

5.27pm BST

Dortmund have suffered some brutal defeats by Bayern in the last five years (5-0, 4-1, 6-0, 5-0, 4-0), though all of those were in Munich. This, they will hope, is different. It needs to be, for the sake of the title race.

5.18pm BST

Hot pre-match quiz action (Bayern fans, don’t bother)

4.52pm BST

Some pre-match reading

4.36pm BST

Mats Hummels is fit to start, which is a big boost for Dortmund, but there’s a blow for little Englanders with the news that Jadon Sancho is only on the bench. In the absence of the injured Thiago, Bayern’s team is as expected.

Borussia Dortmund (3-4-2-1) Burki; Piszczek, Hummels, Akanji; Hakimi, Delaney, Dahoud, Guerreiro; Hazard, Brandt; Haaland.
Substitutes: Hitz, Sancho, Gotze, Balerdi, Morey, Can, Witsel, Schmelzer, Reyna.

4.27pm BST

Hello and welcome to live coverage of what Google Translate is calling The Classic. Yep, it’s time for Der Klassiker! Borussia Dortmund v Bayern Munich is a big one at any time – it’s got its own name and everything – but this meeting, a potential title decider, is the first mega match of football’s new era.

If Bayern win they will be seven points clear with six games to play, and within strutting distance of their eighth consecutive Bundesliga title. But if Dortmund win, the title race will be on with a vengeance – especially if RB Leipzig and Bayer Leverkusen also close the gap by winning their midweek games.

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Published on May 26, 2020 11:22

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