Josh Hanagarne's Blog, page 14

Would Love Your Vote For My SXSW Presentation

Hi all, I’ve applied to give a presentation at SXSW in Austin in the spring. I’ll be talking about some of the challenges a blogger faces in turning a blog into a book, literary agents, publishing pitfalls, and so on and so forth. If you’ve been following me and have seen the videos, you know I can put on a good show.

If you can vote for me–please do–here’s the link. You’ll need to create a panelpicker account and sign in in order to vote.

Once you’re in, if you can’t find my presentation, you can either use this link again and it will open up to the right page, or you can search for my presentation, which is called I arm wrestled Stephen King – Blog To Book.  

Thanks!

Eye Contact?

Hey all, I’ve been on a bit of a body language kick, and I have a particular interest in eye contact. Some of this stems from my inability to sit still for very long (Tourette’s), and some of it comes from how uncomfortable eye contact seems to be for many people.

I’ve never had a problem with it.

How many of you have a hard time holding eye contact with someone? Does anything make it easier?

Just curious, for now.

I Accidentally, A Poem About Josh Hanagarne’s Left Bicep, by Lyndsay Faye

Lyndsay Faye has been one of my favorite authors since her first book, Dust And Shadow: An Account Of The Ripper Killings by Dr. John H. Watson. 

I liked Gods of Gotham even more. I’ve read an advance copy of Seven For A Secret and it’s the best yet. Read her books.

But now she’s outdone herself. Lyndsay and I got squashed next to each other in a tacky limo in Chicago. While we were en route to the restaurant, she said, “I’m going to write a poem about your left biceps.” Her only other body-oriented poem was about Neal Gaiman’s hair. “Okay,” I said, and thought little else about it.

Until this morning.

For your pleasure, displeasure, or amusement and confusion, here is Lyndsay Faye’s I Accidentally, A Poem About Josh Hanagarne’s Left Bicep

Lyndsay, bravo. I think. Tell Gabriel I say hey.

12th Wedding Anniversary

Hi everyone,

Tomorrow is my 12th wedding anniversary. Smartest thing I ever did. Probably not the smartest thing Janette ever did, but nevertheless, I am happy and grateful.

I love you Janette. I always will.

An Unexpected Effect of Reading Blood Meridian

Generally speaking, I think obsessive behavior is usually a bad thing. But I have an obsession that I’ll admit: I am reading Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy for the fourth time this year. This probably brings the total up to at least 30.

Lately, it is the only thing that stops the tics. I can’t prescribe it to you as a remedy for your Tourette Syndrome, but it is the current ameliorative for my own. And the most intensely I study the book, the calmer I get.

I’ve been buying a new copy each time. Then I go through that copy and mark a specific thread or theme. So far this year I’ve done, with four copies:

Instances of mercy (shortest list!)
Words spoken by the kid
Words spoken by the judge
descriptions of landscape

BM rewards careful reading, and it’s rewarding me in a way I never could have anticipated right now. It makes me focus. It calms me down. I don’t even wonder why because it just feels so good to sit still, even if it means wading through gore and hanging out with judge holden.

If you’re a McCarthy nut and you’re looking for a new take on things, Peter Josyph’s Adventures In Reading Cormac McCarthy has some great insights.

Nominated For An Award, Requesting Your Vote

Hey all,

The World’s Strongest Librarian has been nominated for an Arty award here in Salt Lake City. Kind of a big deal and I’m thrilled to be one of the three nominees for best non-fiction book.

I would really appreciate your vote. It’s only going to take about one minute.

Please vote here.

thanks!

A Quick Word About The Jehovah’s Witnesses In My Book

Hi all, I’ve had enough people write to me about a particular passage in my book that I wanted to write a post about it, just so I can refer people to this as the emails come in.

When describing my mom and her unwavering faith (Mormon), I (briefly) contrast her lightheartedness with the relative grimness of the only Jehovah’s Witnesses I had ever known (maybe a dozen–people I met while serving as a missionary, and in discussions I’ve had with them since).

I’m paraphrasing, but I essentially say, “Even though my mom believed with all her heart, it wasn’t oppressive and life was joyful. She was the opposite of the Jehova’s Witnesses I had known.” 

This was totally accurate when I wrote it, based on my admittedly limited experience with the JW religion. The JW’s I had met were bullies and they were mean and I don’t care if they believed what they were doing or not, their demeanor made it impossible for me to ever hear one word of their message.

Now that people from the JW faith are writing to me saying “That’s not accurate and that’s not how we are at all,” that’s fantastic. If it’s not accurate, then my opinions should change with new information, and I’m allowed to be wrong. I’m open to being called out and if I’m wrong I certainly don’t need to argue so I can feel secure.

So if you’re a JW and you’re a happy person trying to do good work, I’m thrilled that you have something you care so deeply about. I wish you well.

I’d have to care a whole lot more than I do to be anti-religion. Any religion.

Also, this isn’t an apology. I think most people are in way too big of a hurry to apologize for every little thing they say or do. But this is an acknowledgment that I don’t know everything and that what I write accurately reflects whatever my perceptions are. When my perceptions are based on false assumptions, I want to change that. So thanks to everyone who’s written to me on this matter.

A Quick Word About The Jehova’s Witnesses In My Book

Hi all, I’ve had enough people write to me about a particular passage in my book that I wanted to write a post about it, just so I can refer people to this as the emails come in.

When describing my mom and her unwavering faith (Mormon), I (briefly) contrast her lightheartedness with the relative grimness of the only Jehova’s witnesses I had ever know (maybe a dozen–people I met while serving as a missionary, and in discussions I’ve had with them since).

I’m paraphrasing, but I essentially say, “Even though my mom believed with all her heart, it wasn’t oppressive and life was joyful. She was the opposite of the Jehova’s Witnesses I had known.” 

This was totally accurate when I wrote it, based on my admittedly limited experience with the JW religion. The JW’s I had met were bullies and they were mean and I don’t care if they believed what they were doing or not, their demeanor made it impossible for me to ever hear one word of their message.

Now that people from the JW faith are writing to me saying “That’s not accurate and that’s not how we are at all,” that’s fantastic. If it’s not accurate, then my opinions should change with new information, and I’m allowed to be wrong. I’m open to being called out and if I’m wrong I certainly don’t need to argue so I can feel secure.

So if you’re a JW and you’re a happy person trying to do good work, I’m thrilled that you have something you care so deeply about. I wish you well.

I’d have to care a whole lot more than I do to be anti-religion. Any religion.

Also, this isn’t an apology. I think most people are in way too big of a hurry to apologize for every little thing they say or do. But this is an acknowledgment that I don’t know everything and that what I write accurately reflects whatever my perceptions are. When my perceptions are based on false assumptions, I want to change that. So thanks to everyone who’s written to me on this matter.

Which Show Would You Cast This Guy In?

So, I told you during the mitten contest post about why my face was all scratched up, but I didn’t tell you why I shaved my head.

Grab a tiny pinch of your hair, right under the ridge on the back of your head. That place where ET’s head got really long. Now yank that hair upwards. It hurts way more than makes sense, and if you do it right, you can incapacitate someone pretty quickly this way.

That was turning into a tic (this is because of Tourette Syndrome) for me, except I was doing it to myself. So, no more hair.

Someone took a picture of me today while I was walking. It does not look at all like the nice, dreamy gent I picture in my head.

So far, people have said it should get me a role on a new season of Oz, or an enforcer on Sons of Anarchy.

Feel free to cast your vote below. I don’t want to be on a sitcom, but I think I could make a great hooligan on Downtown Abbey.

Mitten Contest! Prize: I’ll Write A Song For You

Hi everyone, I’m going to show you a picture that’s about to shatter all of your illusions about me: I’m actually quite a hideous beast, albeit a happy one.

Those scratches you see over there are the results of the upcoming syfy original, Tics On A Plane. If you’ve got Tourette Syndrome, I’m very happy for you if you’ve never had to deal with scratching tics. What you’re seeing here is the result of a pleasant 80 minute flight. I even got a row to myself!

But no. It was not to be. My scratching tics usually aren’t this physical, so I was unprepared. But now it’s time to get prepared, and I’m going to do this with mittens, which I will wear on planes if/when I need to.

Here’s where you come in. It can’t just be any pair of mittens. They have to be incredibly badass. And I need help finding the perfect pair. So here’s what you can do.

1. Find a picture of some mittens you think are perfect for me, and post a link in the comments. Or email it to me through the contact form.

2. Even better. Make a pair for me. Let your imagination run wild.

I will award the winner a crown of glory and I will write a song on the guitar for you, and it will be named after you. That’s the best I can do.

PS: I’m fine. Better than fine. If you sit around waiting for fairness, you’ll be dead long before fairness comes for you. I’m done waiting.

Let’s go.