Jarrod Kimber's Blog, page 49
September 27, 2012
Ben Johnson Charles five
If someone says, hey let’s drive from Colombo to Kandy and back again in a day to see a t20 double header, beat them to death with their dog.
All I can remember is Ben Folds five, blow up dinosaurs, air conditioning ducts and Johnson fucken Charles.
The good news is that inflatable village is open 24 hours.
the superness never ends at kandy
There is no super speed with a super over. Add to that the bail that seemed to have jumped off on its own volition, and the whole process seemed to take longer than the game itself.
While the Windies left the ground mid warm up, I thought of the only super over I could remember. It was oddly a warm up match between Ireland and the Dutch before the 2009 World T20. Ireland scored 6 for one wicket, with three byes and one leg bye. Then the Dutch scored two off the first ball, and had back to back run outs from the third and fourth balls to lose by four runs. It was brilliantly farcical. But it was like the out takes that show during the credits.
Those memories didn’t last long enough, as now the ICC end of match paraphernalia had to be taken from the field. I wondered about the need for a super over. This was only a round robin match; there was real reason why it couldn’t just be a tie. Ties are cool too. Neither team really deserved to win, the kiwis couldn’t field at all and Sri Lanka took their foot off the gas before they even got to the home straight. Some times a tie is fates way of saying, “hey, neither of you deserve to win this”. But this is T20; we must have a result at the end of our 3 (or 4) hours of cricket. This must end cleanly after many minutes of fumbling.
At the moment the scoreboard is being restocked with the correct names, or Chris Gayle has been recruited for New Zealand. I’m not really sure I like a super over, it seems like a lot of fun, but . And like a film with too many endings, it had the perfect story line of the slow motion shoot out where you’re not sure who has died, only for the film to end a few minutes later with an ending of far less tension. A tie is generally going to be more exciting than a super over because it took all match to fester, and isn’t massively contrived.
The three man batting and one man bowling attacks have been chosen. The game could have finished in a cloud of smoke with a controversial run out. We could have had experts musing and debating the end of this game like cricket’s Zapruder film. Everyone could have taken sides. Maybe the bail was taken out by a grassy knee. The whole event seems to deny the law of physics. Sometimes a mysterious end full of questions is the right way to end.
WHAT DID TIM SOUTHEE THINK THE LINES ON THE PITCH MEANT, WHY WAS MCCULLUM CLAPPING, HOW MANY BATSMEN CAN BAT IN A SUPER OVER, WHERE WERE THE BOUNDARIES, WHICH END DO THEY PICK, WHY IS PERERA OUT THERE, HOW THE HELL DID SRI LANKA END UP WITH 13 RUNS, DOES TAYLOR NOT THINK HE CAN HIT MALINGA, IS THERE ANOTHER SUPER OVER AFTER THIS SUPER OVER, WHY CAN’T ANYONE PICK UP THE BALL CLEANLY, WAS THAT A WIDE OR DID MCCULLUM EDGE IT, WILL KUMAR’S DROP LOSE IT FOR SRI LANKA, AND WHAT’S WRONG WITH A TIE.
Buy now as Women’s cricket is 40% off
The opening game of this tournament was held where only one group would be playing, miles from any other side, and against a team that doesn’t draw a crowd.
In the first four days of the tournament no major sides played each other.
The group stages are pointless as shown by the fact that West Indies didn’t complete a match and still progressed.
And this tournament is looking more and more likely not to be shaped by mystery spinners and top order sloggers, but by the rainy season.
TV presenters, experts, writers and people in lounge rooms and bars across the cricket world have talked a lot about these errors from the ICC.
The biggest mistake so far in the tournament was far easier to fix and spot than any of the above, it was someone’s decision to pay women cricketers less than men’s cricketers in their daily allowance.
There is no way that was ever going to be looked upon well if it got out. Basically because there is no way of saying the men, who are all well paid fully professional cricketers, need an extra US$40 a day than the nearly exclusively amateur women cricketers.
Brand Dhoni is worth over 50 million dollars. The Sri Lanka women’s team were drafted into the armed forces so they could afford to continue to play cricket.
There’s no doubt that women’s cricket is funded by the men’s game. Women’s cricket is an amateur sport. As such it’s not taken as seriously as it should be. It can’t get on TV enough because it’s not seen as a high quality or popular sport, and it can’t become professional without the money that sport gets from being TV. It’s trapped in dependency.
For many reasons, women’s cricket has not been taken seriously by all the cricket countries, some cultural, and some financial.
The English women are quickly becoming professional, with Australia not far behind, the New Zealand team has always been strong and India has some of the best players on earth. For too long these four teams have been far too good for the other sides. Now that may be changing. West Indies is building a very strong side and South Africa have started winning games. Women’s cricket may finally have proper competition at the upper levels.
But it’s in India that shows you how far it has to go.
Sania Mirza, the tennis player, has never won a grand slam in singles, she has never been beyond the fourth round in a grand slam. Her ranking has never been higher than No. 27 in singles or No. 7 in doubles. Her greatest achievement is winning the mixed doubles at the Australian and French Opens.
Mithali Raj is the world’s No. 1 ranked ODI batsman, she’s No. 3 in T20 cricket (formerly No. 1). Her Test batting average is 52, in ODI cricket it’s 47 and in T20 it’s 34. She lives in the most cricket crazy place on earth. And is less famous, respected and adulated than Sania Mirza by the population at large.
That’s because women’s tennis does make its own money, it is professional and people take it seriously. Women’s cricket is none of these at the moment.
That doesn’t mean things can’t change. It is ironic that moronic mistakes like paying two different rates for per diems is what sometimes start to changes things, but giving the women US$100 a day instead of US$60 is not going to change the larger issues of how to grow women’s cricket. Until women’s cricket is a viable TV option, the prize money and wages are never going to be anything close to equal.
Right now the women’s tournament is underway. The group stage is being played in Galle and not shown on TV. The only reporters who are covering it are the ones who have travelled here for that alone. There are not many of those. In Kandy and Colombo there are many cricket fans and media who have little to do on days between cricket. Had the women not been hidden away until the semi-final stage they could have got bigger crowds and more coverage, instead of enjoying the beaches of Galle.
Many people abuse or laugh at women’s cricket, but I love it. The relative lack of power in the batting means a much more pure form of cricket. This also brings out the strategy from the captains a lot more. Suzie Bates and Charlotte Edwards are masters of manipulation. I saw seven matches at the World T20 in the UK, and my strongest memories are of Stuart Broad failing to field in the last over against Netherlands, and Claire Taylor’s surgery of Australia’s fielders in the women’s semi-final.
Women cricketers are playing the game simply because they love it; not for financial rewards or fame, but because they simply want to be the best they can and represent their country in the sport they love. They often have to leave the game early because they simply can’t afford to continue to play.
If Mithali Raj was a male cricketer she wouldn’t need that extra US$40 a day. But since tuk tuk drivers and restaurants don’t offer 40% off for women cricketers, neither should the ICC.
September 26, 2012
September 25, 2012
The ministry of Bangladesh
Tonight I had a night off. And I could have spent it in my room masturbating over preggo porn and watching Nasir Jamshed, but instead I went out to dinner.
But, I still made it about cricket.
My dinner was at the Ministry of Crab, the restaurant owned by King Kumar and Mahela Jayawardene.
They love their crab there. Far more than is probably ok.
I mean, I love crab, but I assumed it would be crab and other things. But it was mainly crab, a few prawns and boneless chicken.
Crab tastes great. I really love crab, I won’t hear anything against crab.
But, crab is hard to get into, it’s a better idea in theory than on your plate.
I don’t really want to work for my food.
I just want to eat it as fast as I can.
I don’t want to wait more than a decade to be satisfied.
And this is Bangladesh.
I know that somewhere behind the shell, there is the sweet sweet meat, but how long do I have to wait to eat it. And sure, I am not the person who is actually breaking the shell, but I still have to watch them. I have to fall in love with Iqbal, Hasan, Crashraful and Mortaza as they turn from promising young players into middling middle aged players.
I put in that emotion, and I get little meat. I get nothing. I just get disappointed over and over again.
But, whether it’s ordering crab or watching Bangladesh, I’ll continue to get involved, because that’s what I do.
With crab, it will never pay off, with Bangladesh it might.
Result: Shakib did his thing. Ian Bishop wore a suit that would have impressed a race of aliens who see through vibrations. Pakistan also played.
podcasting with cricket ireland’s ceo
This is the podcast you’ve all been waiting for, it’s the one where I talk to Warren Deutrom, the CEO of Ireland Cricket about Irish Cricket, don’t all rush over at once.
No, you’ll enjoy it, maybe.
September 24, 2012
Next Post
I find goodbyes rather awkward.
Rarely have I been good at them.
Other people often get them right, I either leave abruptly and do it wrong, or I hang around and make everyone feel like I may never leave.
To say a goodbye you need a good closing line, and even if I find one, I’ll step on it or say a 2nd closing line that ruins the first.
Ireland leaves abruptly, although, it’s not their fault.
Their like the people you never really got to know, but bonded quite well with, but when you look for them to say goodbye, someone tells you they left earlier.
Even though they haven’t made a big impact on you, you feel like you missed out on the closure.
This goodbye would have been awkward, because you can’t defend 129 in 19 overs on a good pitch with your best bowler emptying every piece of fluid he has out of his bowels in the team hotel. You just can’t.
But we got no goodbye at all. We couldn’t even jokingly call Johnston a minnow as we shook his hand, or call suggest that Porterfield stop facing the new ball, they’re just gone.
Covered in Sri Lankan rain and Irish vomit they head for the airport.
See, that’s probably what you shouldn’t say in a goodbye.
Result: You got to say look at the O’Briens for a couple of overs. And Chris Gayle danced.
I find goodbyes rather awkward.
Rarely have I been good...
I find goodbyes rather awkward.
Rarely have I been good at them.
Other people often get them right, I either leave abruptly and do it wrong, or I hang around and make everyone feel like I may never leave.
To say a goodbye you need a good closing line, and even if I find one, I’ll step on it or say a 2nd closing line that ruins the first.
Ireland leaves abruptly, although, it’s not their fault.
Their like the people you never really got to know, but bonded quite well with, but when you look for them to say goodbye, someone tells you they left earlier.
Even though they haven’t made a big impact on you, you feel like you missed out on the closure.
This goodbye would have been awkward, because you can’t defend 129 in 19 overs on a good pitch with your best bowler emptying every piece of fluid he has out of his bowels in the team hotel. You just can’t.
But we got no goodbye at all. We couldn’t even jokingly call Johnston a minnow as we shook his hand, or call suggest that Porterfield stop facing the new ball, they’re just gone.
Covered in Sri Lankan rain and Irish vomit they head for the airport.
See, that’s probably what you shouldn’t say in a goodbye.
Result: You got to say look at the O’Briens for a couple of overs. And Chris Gayle danced.
Two chucks at the World t20 day 7 – elephant shitting and lion punching
Indian fans sing very well, Australian fans enjoy the win even more.
