Kevin L. O'Brien's Blog: Songs of the Seanchaí, page 18

Synopsis: Feline Champion (a Team Girl adventure)

Eile and Sunny have been captured by an evil villain and are slowly being lowered into a vat of boiling acid that has been electrically charged. The Girls cry out for help, and one wall explodes as the superhero Snowshoe Kitty breaks through. Screaming curses, the villain releases the brake and the Girls plummet towards the vat. Traveling faster than the speed of thought, SK snatches the Girls just before they strike the surface, frees then, then flies off to catch the villain. Later, as the police take the villain away, screaming threats of revenge and dire consequences, the Girls coo over SK, repeating her name over and over again as they caress her . . .

Snowshoe Kitty awakens as the Girls call to her and gently shake her. She is annoyed at having her dream disturbed, but then remembers they are going out today. She precedes the Girls to the Light Rail station and they ride to Larimer Square, where they window shop, tour the galleries, try on clothes, and have lunch. That afternoon, however, the Girls enter a shop and are captured by the demon Choronzon. He has escaped from his prison and seeks revenge against them. Kitty tries to defend them, but is flung against a wall and falls to the floor, broken and half-dead.

Kitty awakens to find herself in a moonlight meadow. There she is confronted by the mighty Maol Hanluan, the Eternal Champion, one of the Third Born of Bast and a great hero in cat lore. Kitty begs him to help Team Girl, but he refuses, saying that he is a champion of feline kind, not humankind. He offers to grant Kitty the power to save them, but only if she loves them enough to make a sacrifice. Kitty offers to surrender two of her remaining nine lives. Hanluan accepts and sends her back to the real world.

Choronzon is boasting of what he will do with their souls in explicit detail, but first he wants the pleasure of torturing them to death. Even as he begins, however, he hears a voice challenging him to cease. When he looks, he sees an anthropomorphic Kitty, hale and whole, clad in armor as clear as pure water, bearing a flaming sword and a shield that shines brighter than the sun. She leaps at him, batters him into submission, and forces him back into his prison, thus saving the Girls. As the spell that bound them is released, the armor disappears and Kitty returns to normal. Kitty erases the Girls' memories of the event, but he instills in them a hypnotic suggestion to buy her cream, caviar, bay shrimp, and prime rib.

Later that night, after the Girls are asleep, Kitty goes out her cat door and into the nearby park. There Hanluan appears. She thanks him for the power to save Team Girl, saying that she is forever in his debt, but he says it is he who owes her. He explains that he cannot take from her the gift that Bast has given her, namely her nine lives; it had been a test to see how devoted she was to her human friends. Having passed the test, and proven her courage and fortitude, by the decree of the Second Born he owes her a reward. And it will be the ability to summon forth her anthropomorphic form and the armor and arms whenever her owners are in greatest peril and nothing else will save them. As he bounds away into the night, he declares he is proud of her and wishes her luck, but also admonishes her not to abuse the privilege.

Christina of Sweden: Royal Tomboy

Queen of Sweden from 1632 to 1654, and the daughter of Gustavus II Adolphus. She is best known historically for her great intelligence and learning and her refusal to marry, and popularly for abdicating the thrown and dressing and acting as a man.

For more information, see this article.

Tales of Uncle Gene - 1

Eile lost her mother and father when she was barely a year old. She was raised by her Uncle Gene, her mother's brother, a former Marine Corps drill instructor. He taught her to box, among other things.

He was gay and had numerous friends, and over the years they told her stories about his time in the Corps. This is one of those stories:

It was '68, in 'Nam; Gene was on his third tour o' duty. Word had come down the pike that we were gettin' a new platoon leader, a Lieuie [2nd Lieutenant] fresh outta Annapolis. Well, we're at assembly and he comes walkin' up to us, and he shouts out in his squeaky voice:

"I understand we've got ourselves a cream puff in this outfit! Well, I eat cream puffs for breakfast. I want him front and center, right now!"

So Gene marches out, smart as can be, stands no more than a foot in front of him, snaps a salute, and bellows:

"Cream puff reporting as ordered. Sir!"

Now, picture this if you can. The Lieuie can't be more than five-eight, in his combat boots, 125 pounds soaking wet, and there's Gene standing over him, six-foot-three, 225 pounds if he's an ounce, chest like an oil drum. The Lieuie looks up at him and says:

"You're a fag?!" This was before 'Don't ask, don't tell', mind you.

Gene replies, "Yes, Sir! But, you're not my type. Sir!"

And with that, he spins around, marches back to his squad, and falls inta place beside them. Well Missy, there's the Lieuie, standing there, staring at him, speechless, his eyes all bugged out and his jaw scrapin' the ground. He simply didn't know what to do with himself. He obviously had a much different picture of what a gay man would look like.

But I guarantee you, he never brought it up again!

Newsletter?

Now that my reserve of stories for publication has been exhausted, I have an idea to send out an email newsletter 4 to 6 times a year, containing announcements of future ebooks, published stories, new stories started, and new stories finished, as well as general news on submissions, rejections, rewrites, new projects, and background material.

If this sounds like something you might want to see, Like It, leave a comment, or send me a message or email to let me know. If there seems to be enough interest, I can start collecting contact information immediately and send out the first newsletter fairly soon.

Omnipresent Tropes

There are some tropes that are so intrinsic to storytelling that they show up in all forms of media and appear in virtually every story. Even Finnegan's Wake, which may not have a plot, conflict, or theme, has a few of these ubiquitous tropes.

They are known as Omnipresent Tropes . They also include tropes that are not intrinsic, but seem to occur ALL the time. Such as Acceptable Breaks From Reality , which are tropes that are unrealistic on their face but are an inseparable part of the escapist appeal of fiction. A story can suffer terrible damage if these are averted. Then there are the timeless classics that everyone expects to see in some form, such as the Happy Ending. However, some Omnipresent Tropes are restricted to specific genres; that is, they are ubiquitous within one genre, but totally missing form all others. This special case is call the Necessary Weasel .

Ultimately, these tropes prove that Tropes Are Not Bad, because if these are cliches, that so are all stories throughout the history of fiction.

What follows is a list of the Omnipresent Tropes that appear in my stories, and how they are used.

The Anthropic Principle -- For any given story, there exist basic elements that are required for the story to happen. No matter how improbable or impossible their occurrence, they must exist, or there would be no story. This also includes mundane, everyday activities that occur behind the scenes. In other words, a story always happens within a larger defined universe.

***** Played straight in my stories for the most part, but occasionally subverted when I describe characters performing mundane activities that do not otherwise advance the plot.

The Law of Conservation of Detail -- The only elements that should be included in a story are those that advance the plot or develop the characters. Anything else is at best distracting, at worst hazardous to the narrative.

***** I play this pretty straight in my shorter works, but I tend to subvert it in longer works where I add more detail to my descriptions so as to paint vivid pictures. I also subvert it overall as I try to work in as much world-building detail as I can without bogging down the narrative.

Back Story -- A character's entire life before she appears in the story.

***** Played straight, in that all my characters have a back story, which I meticulously work out before I write the story. How much I reveal is dictated by the requirements of the plot.

The Protagonist -- The character whom the story is about. She doesn't need to be The Hero or even the story's POV.

***** Medb hErenn, Eile and Sunny of Team Girl, and Sir Differel Van Helsing, along with one-shot characters in other stories.

The Antagonist -- In any story with conflict, the character who opposes The Protagonist, even if that character is God, The Protagonist herself, or a force of nature.

***** Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel all face adversaries in their stories.

Villains Act, Heroes React -- The Antagonist initiates the story by executing a plan, and The Protagonist responds by thwarting it.

***** Mostly played straight, in that Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel are simply living their lives when crap happens. Downplayed with Differel in that she is proactive enough to plan for interventions, but she rarely initiates one without cause. However, inverted in the Dreamlands when Team Girl initiates an adventure and a specific antagonist reacts to oppose them for that instance.

The Good Guys Always Win -- The Protagonist always defeats the The Antagonist. It can be subverted, especially with a Downer Ending , but it's rarely done except when using a cynical theme.

***** Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel always beat whoever oppose them, though not necessarily in the most obvious way. This is especially true of Differel, since in her case defeat would equal death; that is, any villain that defeated her would most likely kill her.

Character Development -- A change in the nature of a character over the course of a story or a series of stories, for good or ill.

***** Though Medb, Team Girl, and Differel do not necessarily change in any one story, they grow and develop over the course of multiple stories, especially Differel.

Static Character -- A character that does not change significantly; that is, a character that undergoes little or no development.

***** Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel tend not to change within any one story, but mostly this applies to secondary characters who do not need to change.

Rounded Character -- A complex, three-dimensional character with hidden, often conflicting motivations, regardless of whether she changes or not.

***** I try to make Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel as complex as possible, while preserving certain basic traits that make them recognizable.

Distinctive Appearances -- Characters should have unique descriptions that easily and clearly distinguish them from all other characters, especially secondary or stock characters.

***** Medb is a "massive woman", with braids and a curtain of gold-tinted bronze hair; Eile has a long seal-brown ponytail and face-framing forelocks dyed a vivid fuchsia with nose and ear piercings, while Sunny has a great billowing mane of gamboge hair and granny glasses; and Differel has flat lifeless stringy gray hair that falls loose to the small of her back with large round glasses.

Character Death -- Exactly What It Says On the Tin: a character dies in story.

***** I have several stories where characters die. Usually it's the villain; sometimes it's Team Girl and/or Differel (in Alternative Reality tales). However, Medb is virtually immortal, and Team Girl and Differel will not die in the canonical tales until their appropriate times.

The Climax -- The point in the story when the conflict is resolved once and for all, one way or the other.

***** Since all my stories have some form of conflict, they have a climax that resolves that conflict.

Denouement -- The aftermath of the climax, when the mysteries are explained, the loose ends tied up, and the ultimate fate of the characters is revealed.

***** I am rather fond of denouements myself.

Rising Conflict -- The gradual increase in the level and severity of the conflict to the climax as a way to provide tension.

***** This is such an intrinsic part of storytelling I do it without thinking. Whether I do it successfully I leave to my readers to decide.

Consistency -- Readers expect a story to be consistent with the real world, consistent with other fictional works in the same genre, and consistent with itself.

***** Since consistency goes to the verisimilitude, I try to make my stories as consistent as possible, within certain limits and guidelines.

Fiction Never Lies -- The reader expects to be able to trust that the narrative is fairly straightforward and accurate, and the creator of the work will not deceive or mislead him.

***** This does not rule out the possibility of plot twists, red herrings, and unreliable narrators, but they work because the reader doesn't expect them. In any event, I am not writing surreal, dream-like stories or stream-of-consciousness tales, so I make every effort to construct narratives that a reader can accept at face value.

Reality is Unrealistic / Realistic Diction Is Unrealistic -- The tendency to believe a fictional account is more true than a factual account, because it reinforces "common knowledge"; that is, what everybody believes to be true. Hence, a realistic depiction based on fact can be derided for being fake if it contradicts "what everybody knows".

The latter trope is based more on the fact that fictional speech tends to be more polished and rehearsed than speech in Real Life. Part of this is due to editing to make it understandable, while part is due to the desire of the author/writer/actor/director to "get it perfect", and the rest is due to the fact that our brains edit and interpret Real Life speech to make it comprehensible. So fictional speech tends to try to reproduce what we hear rather than what we actually say.

***** I try to be as realistic as possible in my stories, but there are things I must bow to to avoid alienating readers. As for speech, except for reproducing accents, I polish my prose like everyone else.

Like Reality Unless Noted -- A reader assumes that all details and elements not otherwise described are identical to those in Real Life.

***** I use this trope as a way to emphasize what's different from Real Life.

Willing Suspension of Disbelief -- In exchange for a good story, the reader is willing to temporarily and conditionally accept that the plot is real and the narrative is accurate.

***** Like all writers, I depend on this as the basis for my hope that readers will enjoy my stories.

Evil Virtues -- For the villain to accomplish anything meaningful, he must have a few virtues normally reserved for heroes, or at least one or two that would complement his evil nature.

***** Whether my villains are truly evil or just misunderstood, at a minimum they have the ambition and drive to enact their nefarious schemes.

Fourth Wall -- The imaginary barrier between the characters and the reader, such that the characters do not realize they have an audience.

***** Goes without saying, but occasionally I Lean on the Fourth Wall or Break the Fourth Wall entirely.

Functional Genre Savvy -- Without necessarily thinking in terms of tropes in and of themselves, the characters nonetheless display knowledge of the conventions of the story’s genre and abide by the restrictions imposed by that genre. For example, detectives in mysteries assume murder rather than accidental death, and an innocent bystander in horror assumes monsters rather than more mundane explanations.

***** All my characters display an understanding of whatever genre they find themselves in, even if only subconsciously, but Sunny is the one most likely to Hang a Lampshade on an obvious trope.

Inciting Incident -- The event at the beginning of the story that gets the narrative started.

***** Because Medb, Team Girl, and Sir Differel follow Villains Act, Heroes React, or otherwise have normal lives to lead, all my stories have an opening scene that sets them up to become involved in the plot.

Men Are Tough / Women Are Delicate -- The default stereotypes that readers subconsciously assume. Many other tropes are based on playing these tropes straight or subverting them, but even an aversion assumes that these tropes are expected and accepted as natural. There is some justification for them based on biology and social convention, yet what changes are being made in general attitudes are noteworthy because they go against these general expectations.

***** Medb is a female Conan; Eile and Sunny are girly-girls who can kick ass like Jean-Claude Van Damme; Sir Differel is a woman who stands toe-to-toe with ravenous monsters and beats them into the dirt. Note that in each case, despite these ladies being strong, rounded, complex characters (I hope!), they stand out because they defy the Women Are Delicate trope.

Most Writers Are Adults / Most Writers Are Human / Most Writers Are Men -- The reason animal and alien characters tend to act and sound like humans, children tend to act and sound like adults, and stories either have only male characters or the female characters tend to be stereotypes (The Damsel in Distress or the Action Girl).

***** I try to Defy these tropes as much as I can, but being an adult male human it can be rather difficult.

Nobody Poops / No Dead Body Poops -- In fiction, no one goes to the bathroom, and no one defecates when they die. (Death is often quite messy, including the involuntary evacuation of bowels and bladder.)

***** Following The Law of Conservation of Detail, there is normally no need to narrate a character going to the bathroom. Plus, many readers may find it disgusting. However, I subverted this in one story, because it was while Differel relieved herself that a mole stole a gun she had hidden. As for messy deaths, so far I have had no reason to describe one in gory detail, so I play this trope straight.

Perfect Health -- In fiction, no one gets sick or injured, unless the plot calls for it.

***** This is justified in my stories, in that Medb has physical and magical immunity to injury and disease, and Team Girl and Differel are health and fitness freaks. However, the only reason I so far have not depicted any of them getting the sniffles or a cough is because the prevalence of this trope would mislead a reader into believing there is something seriously wrong with them.

No Periods, Period / All Periods Are PMS -- In fiction, no women menstruate, or if they do, it is always accompanied by full-blown PMS.

***** Again, I tend to play the first trope fairly straight, since normally there is no reason to even mention that a character is having her period. Though I suppose that if men suffered from something similar each month, it would show up in fiction quite often. However, I avert it in two stories in which Differel is concerned about menstruation, either her own or another’s. As for the second trope, I have ignored or averted it so far, but in fact Sunny is prone to rather insane bouts of PMS at times.

Plot Device -- Any character or object that drives the Plot and/or resolves a situation in the narrative.

***** The MacGuffin is the most common Plot Device I use in my stories.

Plot Point -- Any event, appearance, or revelation within the narrative that drives the Plot.

***** As with some other Omnipresent Tropes, I wasn’t even aware I was using it until I learned about it.

Point of View -- Every story is told from someone’s perspective, even if that someone is God, the unidentified, unseen, disembodied Narrator, or the Camera.

***** I tend to use third-person limited POV; I get into a character’s head and describe everything from her perspective. For long stories I will switch to a new character for a period of time before going to another or switching back. The only time I use third-person omniscient is when I need to describe large-scale action too big for one character to take in. I have occasionally used first-person as well.

Think In Text (Italics) -- In prose fiction, thoughts must be written down as well as speech. Writers use one of numerous methods to indicate when a character is thinking rather than speaking.

***** I use italics, with the first thought of the story appended with “she thought”. I also place Vlad’s telepathic speech inside scrolls -- { } -- to differentiate his words from Differel’s thoughts.

Third Person Flashback --The tendency to depict flashbacks like a movie, outside the character’s head, so that the character is seen as part of the action as if witnessed by another person altogether.

***** I tend to ignore this trope. I don’t use flashbacks too often, but when I do I usually stay inside the head of the character having the flashback.

Next week I will discuss Universal Tropes.

Dreamlands Bestiary: The Moonbeasts

This race is an anomally: a non-Dreaming species that nonetheless is able to cross over into the Dreamlands at will. Most people speculate that they do so using gates, but very rare is the investigator who can infiltrate one of their cities and return alive, and so far no one has learned their secret.

They are so called because in both the Dreamlands and the Waking World they have established settlements on the dark side of Earth's moon. In the Waking World, while they may have been more active in the past, they currently keep a low profile to avoid detection. Despite their advanced technology, even they cannot ward off or survive half a dozen 10-megaton nuclear missiles dropped from orbit. They would rather wait until Humans destroy themselves.

In the Dreamlands, however, they are more active, though there too they tend to operate in the background, mainly because they are few in number and they suffer from the same technological restriction Humans do. They conquered and enslaved the Leng Men, but for some unguessable reason did not do the same with Humans. However, some Humans willingly deal with them, trading them slaves for their rubies, or acting as agents or proxies. While they do not experience fear as Humans understand it, they are cautious of the Cats, and in fact it is only because of their alliance with the Outre Cats that the Queen and her Council of Elders do not order their extermination.

They have built large cities on the dark side of the Dream-Moon and they mine its depths for unique rubies that are worth their weight in gold. They travel between the Moon and the Land of Dreams in black galleys that can traverse the aether of outer space as well as the seas and oceans of the Dreamworld. They trade their rubies for slaves and gold, using proxies to prevent their trading partners from discovering who they are really dealing with. They row and steer the galleys themselves; their Leng Men crew operate the top deck and the sails. Because of their physical strength and endurance they are tireless, and can easily outlast any Human oared vessel they wish to capture. The slaves, whether Leng Man or Human, are used for physical labor, usually in the mines, entertainment, and food.

Physically, they resemble hideous massive outre toad-like beings with no eyes but with facial tentacles above their huge mouths. In fact, their bodies are amorphous, and they can assume a wide variety of horrendous forms. Coupled with their strength and endurance, this makes them very hard to kill, in that they can absorb damage that would kill a Human outright. Even a mob of cats, attacking in unison, would be hard-pressed to kill a Moonbeast without taking multiple casualties. They have never been observed to use weapons, but they do not need them; they can tear or bite an opponent in half or swallow smaller ones whole.

Moonbeasts have inhuman personalities. They do not appear to have any emotions or morality as Humans understand them, nor do they think like Humans. Often the motives behind their decisions and activities are unguessable. They torture and consume captives and slaves, but whether they derive any "pleasure" from it is unknown. However, their "sadism" exceeds anything Humans can imagine. It may be the desire to avoid this fate that convinces many of their slaves to cooperate and be of service (at least, those who are given a choice).

Synopsis: Dragonslayers (a Sir Differel adventure)

The return of the Princess in Orange.

Sir Differel Van Helsing blinks and snaps back to the present, finding herself in the midst of a garden party hosted by Lady Margaret. Naturally, she stands as the odd-man out in her pants suit amid cocktail and summer dresses. Three women stand in front of her, chatting about some inane subject and trying to involve her in a most awkward fashion. Margaret joins them, but after a few more minutes Differel can’t take any more and makes an excuse about not feeling well. As she heads for the house, she can hear the women talking about her in a catty fashion, which prompts Margaret to stand up for her.

Once inside, she pauses long enough to look back outside, and sees Margaret following her. She waits for her to join her, then apologizes for leaving so abruptly. Margaret waves it off, saying she understood she might be uncomfortable, but she still thought it would be worth a chance she might enjoy it. Differel corrects her, saying that’s not it. Margaret says something’s bothering her and asks what it is. When Differel indicates it’s a long story, Margaret states she has time, and takes her to a drawing room. She orders tea, and as they wait, Differel starts her story:

She awakens as if from a sound sleep to find herself lying naked except for her glasses in an open hotdog bun that has been slathered with mustard, with the Princess in Orange, grown to gargantuan size, towering over her. Before she can do much more than push herself up, the PiO dumps a load of chili on her, effectively trapping her under its weight. Her head hangs off the end and she watches in growing horror as the Carcosan Royal layers on chopped onions and shredded cheese. She asks if the PiO intends to eat her, and she replies that if she can’t one way, she will another. She asks about the re-evaluation she said she would do, and the PiO responds that unfortunately Momsy and Dadsy are getting impatient, so she can't waste anymore time. She lifts the bun feet-first up to her face and Differel watches as she licks her lips and opens her mouth. Desperate, Differel screams she’s wasting the opportunity while squeezing her eyes shut in anticipation of being bitten in half.

When nothing happens, she opens her eyes and sees the PiO staring at her. She asks what she means, and Differel states that she’s much too fine a meal to be consumed in so provincial a manner. The PiO really should serve her up as a gourmet meal; after all, as an aristocrat she deserves it. When the PiO complains that she’s hungry now, Differel makes it a last request; besides, anticipation only whets the appetite more. The PiO asks her what kind of recipe she would suggest. Differel describes a beef cut marinated in sherry with berries and spices, served on a bed of rice with a port wine and brown sugar sauce. The PiO is salivating and agrees to her idea. She picks her out of the bun, dumps off the fillings, and lays her back on a plate. Differel leaps to her feet to escape, but the Princess places an upside-down glass over her to keep her in place. She states she needs a few things, so she’s going to the store, but she’ll be right back. She then leaves.

Differel is glad she bought herself some time, but she doesn’t know what to do with it. She calls to Vlad, but he doesn’t respond and she can’t hear him. She throws her weight against the glass, but she can't tip it enough to make it fall over. Just when she thinks it’s hopeless, a nude female mouse furry approaches her, wearing a belt with a knife made from a shard of glass inserted into a scabbard. She offers to free Differel, but only if she agrees to help her people. With no other choice, Differel accepts.

They work together pushing against the glass to start it rocking. It’s tough going and takes what seems to Differel to be too long to get it to shift enough to topple it. Finally, however, it falls down on its own, and Differel crouches to allow it to pass overhead. As she stands up, they hear the PiO call out that she’s home. The mouse lady panics, but Differel takes her hand and they run across the counter to hide behind some appliances. The PiO sweeps into the kitchen carrying a bag of groceries, but while she walks right past the plate, she doesn’t notice the overturned glass. She goes to the opposite side of the room by the sink, her back to their hiding place. However, the glass rolls slowly towards the edge of the counter, threatening to fall off.

Differel and the mouse lady make a break for it. They run to a corner of the counter, where the mouse lady jams an opened paperclip into a crack in the wood. A length of string is attached to it, which she throws over the edge. She directs Differel to descend the string, then follows. Once on the ground, the glass finally drops off and shatters on the floor. The PiO turns around in surprise and locks eyes with Differel. She and the mouse lady race across the floor for an opening in the wall and manage to duck inside moments before the plate crashes against the wall.

They retreat some distance from the entrance, then pause to rest, watching as the PiO reaches in trying to grab them, all the while screaming curses. The mouse lady introduces herself as Murina. She retrieves a spear, also made from a shard of glass tied to the end of a chopstick with the string sealed in wax, and a pack. She removes a bota bag and takes a drink, then offers it to Differel. She also offers her a peanut fragment and a crumb of hard cheese, both as big as a fist. She then slings the pack over her shoulder and starts walking. With nowhere else to go, Differel follows.

Murina leads her on a rather long walk that often requires them to climb or descend string ropes, traverse pipes over deep chasms, or sidle along the edges of sheer drops. When Differel tries to engage her in conversation, she signals her to keep silent. Differel isn’t sure why, there doesn’t seem to be anyone else around, but she understands that this is Murina’s world, so she would know its hazards better than her. Even so, several times Murina hesitates, then moves to duck out of sight of something, gesturing for Differel to do the same. She never sees what they are hiding from, but each time Murina looks terrified that whatever it is might find them.

There are other creatures in this world: they encounter ants, beetles, pseudoscorpions, and mites, though nothing particularly dangerous, and various fungi that seem to serve as the basis for the food chain. At one point they encounter a cellar spider, but while it acts aggressively, it avoids Murina’s spear and finally leaves them alone. Since she showed no fear of it, Differel doubted that was what she tried to avoid earlier.

Eventually they arrive at what Differel takes to be Murina’s home. It appears to be a dead-space in a wall, something like a spear closet, and built into several levels. Differel sees that the people are all mouse furries like Murina, of both sexes and various ages, none of whom wear clothes. Murina takes her to her private den to store away her equipment, then takes her to where she can clean up, giving her an impromptu tour. Most of the levels are living space, some private like Murina’s, but most communal. There are also storage areas for food, bedding, and other supplies, a fungus garden, an exercise area where adults practice with homemade weapons, a workshop where they make the few items they cannot gather, even a school. At the top level an exposed pipe has a small crack that lets a trickle of water leak out. It’s caught by a shallow pan, and the overflow follows a metal gutter to flow over the edge of an abyss. Murina gives her a piece of soap and as she washes under the trickle, the mouse lady explains that they collect it in thimbles, makeshift metal pails, or wooden buckets. Differel figures there should be a way to make a cistern to hold more water, that way they don’t have to bath in their drinking water.

When she’s finished Murina gives her a towel—essentially a piece of fabric cut from a larger sample—to dry off with and then takes her to the refectory for dinner. The mouse people do fairly well when it comes to finding food, though the quality for some items isn’t all that great. Differel finds it difficult to stomach most of it except for dry goods and the stew, which thankfully contains largely unrecognizable bits. Even so, it’s delicious. She is unnerved by the way the other people all stare at her, and if the children try to approach her an adult takes then away. Murina explains that her appearance is strange and frightens them, but they are more worried about what she represents. When Differel asks what that is, she avoids responding. One mouse child offers her a nugget of cookie, which she accepts, but then asks if she’s here to slay the dragon. Before she can ask about that, an adult hurries her off, and once again Murina will not explain.

After the meal Murina takes her to see Colomay, the oldest and wisest of her people. In another dead-space accessed through a hole, lit by oil lamps and warmed by a small fire of charcoal granules, Differel meets an ancient female mouse person, who looks older than even any human she’s ever seen. She sits on a stool behind a makeshift drawing and writing table, with stacks of loose paper surrounding her everywhere. Murina excuses herself, and Colomay invites Differel to come in. She offers her some sherry, stolen from the Princess. After they have a sip, the old mouse lady gets down to business.

They are all descendents of people the Princess kidnapped and turned into mouse furries to be pets. She was only a little girl when they engineered a mass escape and managed to find refuge in this space in the walls. In any event, things were tough the first several years, but after a decade they had managed to learn what they needed to survive. They have done well ever since and are beginning to prosper, but just recently a new danger has appeared. They call it the dragon, but they don’t know what it is; no one who has seen it has ever returned to report about it. That is perhaps the oddest aspect of all: the victims just disappear with no trace; not even a pool of blood. People have disappeared before, never to return, but in the past it was at a rate of two or three a year, all hunters or gatherers. Now they’re loosing two or three a week, and it could be anyone. At that rate they will be decimated in a few months. Everyone is scared; hunting and gathering forays have been cut back to a bare minimum, endangering the colony with starvation and shortages of critical resources, but the attacks continue and have pressed close to their home. The threat must be dealt with, but volunteers who have gone out to slay the dragon have not come back. So they turn to her for help.

Differel realizes her biggest advantage to them is that she is expendable; if she fails none of them are lost. But she asks how they knew about her, or that she would help them? The mouse sage explains that the one who had organized their escape had been her teacher and mentor, and eventually her lover. Before he died, he wrote down a prophesy, and she shows it to her. It reads:

“There will come one pale as ash —
bound as for sacrifice and given over to the orange devil —
bearing the sword of truth.
Calamity will proceed her,
death will accompany her,
but freedom will follow in her wake.”

Colomay explains that everyone is taught this prophesy from birth, so that when Murina found her in the kitchen she naturally believed she was its fulfillment. She certainly fulfills the first two stanzas, but she has no sword. Still, she appears to be their best hope.

Differel asks what happens next. Colomay replies that the council wants to examine her; it will decide what is to be done. It will convene tomorrow morning after breakfast. If it decides she is the fulfillment of the prophecy, it will order the community to provide whatever aid she needs, but if it decides otherwise, or if she refuses to help them, they will order her banished, or may even turn her over to the Princess. Those along with cutting rations are their only forms of punishment.

Murina comes to collect her, explaining that it is time to sleep. Differel assumes she will be given a compartment, or sleep with Murina in hers, but the mouse lady explains that those are rewards given for special accomplishments. They can hold two people comfortably, but she has a companion she sleeps with, a young male she is training to be a warrior. Instead Differel has two choices. There are a number of established male warriors who have expressed an interest in sharing their compartment with her, though she will be expected to allow them to mate with her in return. Otherwise she can share a communal bed. There are two types: those used by everyone and those used by pregnant and nursing mothers. Murina recommends she use the latter, if she does not want some a male to try to mate with her in the night. Differel considers her choice, and chooses to share a compartment. Murina introduces her to a strapping beefcake male about her same age, then leaves them alone. She does notice that Murina goes off with an adolescent male. She accompanies her companion to his compartment and lets him make love to her. He doesn't kiss her, but she finds his tongue especially stimulating. After her finishes and he embraces her for the night, and she drifts off to sleep, some odd points nag at her, but she can’t tease them out into the open before oblivion takes her.

In the morning she awakens when the others get up. Murina comes for her and takes her to the refectory for breakfast. It’s simple fare and quickly eaten, and then the call to council is made, like a muezzin calling the Muslim faithful to prayer. She notices that the only adults who do not attend are the pregnant females; they in turn watch over the underage children. Otherwise everyone attends. Murina escorts her to the center of the exercise area while the mouse furries form a semi-circle around her. At the center stand a male and female furry with Colomay; she assumes they are the headman and woman.

The meeting begins with Colomay making a blessing, which essentially amounts to a plea to the Princess in Orange not to interfere. The headman then demands that she justify her claim to be the fulfillment of the prophecy. She causes consternation when she denies having made such a claim, but Murina states she makes the claim, and Colomay seconds her. They are followed by a number of yeas but also an equal number of boos. The headwoman calls for silence, and after a few moments she states that it is true that the Stranger meets some of the criteria: she has ashen hair; she was bound for sacrifice to the Orange Devil; and calamity has preceded her in the form of the Dragon. But she is not pale, death has not accompanied her, they cannot say whether she was given over to the Orange Devil, and there is no sword. If there was, they might be willing to overlook certain deficiencies, but without it, everything else would have to be perfect, and it isn’t.

The headman then speaks and states that there is the fact that she was taken from the Orange Devil, that She knows by whom, and that She was angry. That could lead Her to take reprisals against them. However, if they give Differel back to Her, She would probably leave them alone; She might even rid them of the Dragon. He calls for a vote, and while a significant minority, including Murina, ask that she be allowed to stay, over two-thirds demand that she be handed over. The headwoman announces the verdict, and commands that she bound and taken to where offerings are left.

However, Differel will not go quietly and she demands a chance to prove herself. Colomay states she has the right to challenge the decision, which she does. The headman and woman object, but when Colomay states that nothing in the law limits it to furries, they relent. The headman calls for the lots. A number of furries come forward, of various ages and both sexes, including Murina, and a young female furry offers each one a bowl. They each reach in and withdraw a smooth, round stone. Most are white, but Murina removes a black one. The headwoman announces that the champion has been chosen. Murina objects, but Colomay states she must fulfill her obligations. Two more young furries, each bearing a large knife made from a glass shard, appear as the rest of the selection group return to the audience. One gives her knife to Murina while the other gives his to Differel. She figures she understands what’s going on, but asks for clarification. Colomay explains that the challenge requires her to fight the council’s champion, selected by chance from the pool of trained fighters, to the death. Murina swore an oath as a fighter to serve as champion if selected. She must try to kill her, or be given over to the Orange Devil herself; she has no choice. When Differel offers to rescind the challenge and accept the judgment of the council, Colomay states it is too late; once made, no challenge can be abandoned. Her only choice now is to defend herself or let Murina kill her, but if she chooses the former she must fight to death as well, otherwise they will both be given over to the Orange Devil. She states she understands.

As Murina takes a moment to limber up, Differel examines her weapon. It’s like a bowie knife: large, thick blade, with a sharp point and single keen edge, but also a heavy back for parrying. She knows the edge is only a few molecules thick, sharper than a razor blade, but delicate and easily chipped. She figures that if she can maneuver right, she can render Murina’s blade useless, then she can physically subdue her. Perhaps that way she can avoid killing her. When Murina takes up a fighting stance, Differel assumes one too, and at a signal from Colomay they charge each other.

Murina turns out to be very good, very well trained, and she doesn’t fight fair. Plus the claws on her fingers and toes give her an advantage. Differel doesn’t want to kill her if she can somehow avoid it, but Murina doesn’t handicap herself in that way. In fact, Differel realizes that, as much as she might desire her to be the fulfillment of prophecy, she fears being given to the Princess more. As they fight, though, Differel again realizes something’s off, but she can’t distract herself by dwelling on it.

At one point, Murina manages to trip her up. Differel catches herself before she falls on her back, but Murina leaps at her to deliver a killing blow. Differel parries but her blade shatters. She rolls into Murina, throwing her onto her face. As the furry pushes herself up, Differel catches her in a choke hold. She grabs her knife hand and slams the blade into the wooden floor, snapping it off at the hilt. When she lets go, Caliburn appears in her hand. She forces Murina down on her face and jams the point of the sword into the back of her head. She declares the contest over, declares herself the winner, and demands that Murina be allowed to live. She expects to get an argument, but she hears the people whispering, “The sword!” Soon they are chanting, “The Sword; the Sword.” Realizing she has a trump card, she turns to the headman and woman, and announces that she has the sword of truth. She then reminds them that according to their own words its presence alone confirms she is the fulfillment of prophecy, though they themselves fulfilled part of it when they decided to give her over to the Orange Devil. A multitude of yeas fill the air until the crowd chants their approval. The headman and woman raise their hands and the crowd falls silent. The headman states that it would appear that she is the fulfillment of prophecy, in which case they have no choice but to honor it. The headwoman then declares that both she and Murina can go free, to which the crowd cheers.

As Differel helps Murina to her feet, however, an adolescent male mouse furry charges into the meeting, scared out of his mind and hysterically screaming about the Dragon. Murina grabs him and manages to calm him down enough for him to state the Dragon attacked the children and pregnant females. Everyone rushes to the school and finds it empty. Then the youth states they escaped to Colomay’s study, where the Dragon couldn’t reach them. They do find everyone there, and at first it seems that, while frightened nearly to death, they are all safe, but then they discover that two of the older children were killed and two with one pregnant female gravely wounded. Then the worst: one of the pregnant females was seized by the Dragon and carried off. Differel realizes that all significant provisions of the prophecy have now been fulfilled except the last.

She asks what the Dragon looked like, but everyone is too traumatized to respond. However, one little girl furry, old enough to understand the situation but not too old not to find it all exciting, offers to draw a picture. Colomay provides her with paper and a graphite stick, and while her image is fantasized and crude, Differel recognizes it as a lizard. Suddenly the lack of bodies or blood makes sense: depending upon its relative size, it could swallow even an adult furry whole.

She announces that she plans to pursue the Dragon immediately, and she will not return until she has slain it. She asks for volunteers to help her, but states she will not think ill of anyone who refuses. At first no one speaks up, as she expected, but then Murina volunteers. She didn’t expect that, but upon reflection she realizes that since Murina believed in her first, she would be the most likely individual to volunteer. What surprises her is that Murina’s toyboy also volunteers, and she is shocked when Murina accepts him without hesitation. However, no one else volunteers. Murina excuses herself and leaves, but when she returns she not only has her glass-shard spear, but also a battle axe fashioned from a larger slab of glass. She gives the spear to her protégé as others give them supplies. Finally Colomay blesses them, and they start off.

Differel has Murina lead the way as she takes up the rear, with the young furry between them. She has them put space between them, so that even if they are traveling together, each of them will make a tempting target. The young furry asks how they’ll find the Dragon, and Differel states they won’t have to; it will find them.

They walk for some time, going deeper into the walls of the house, with occasional stops for rest. Differel had expected the lizard to attack them by now. They’re all getting tired, and at some point they will have to stop to sleep, a prospect that does not appeal to Murina. There are other dangers besides the Dragon, and no foragers have ever camped out away from the community for fear of them.

Suddenly the lizard charges out and grabs the young furry in its jaws. As it raises its head to swallow him, he rams the spear into its neck, hitting a blood vessel that spurts blood. The jaws spasm and it drops him, but he lies still. Differel and Murina charge it from opposite sides. Murina is closer and she chops at the back of its neck. The axehead bites deep, but the lizard turns on her and forces her to retreat. Differel slashes with Caliburn, inflicting long, deep wounds, and it turns towards her. She and Murina take turns distracting it as they attack, but while they are hurting it, they can’t seem to find a vital spot, and they are becoming exhausted.

Murina strikes again, but the axehead jams in the spine. She takes too long to pull it loose, and the lizard catches her under one foot. She screams in pain as it digs in with its claws and catches an arm in its jaws. Differel rushes up, swings Caliburn underhanded, and slashes across the lizard’s throat, severing the windpipe and major blood vessels. As the lizard thrashes its head, she holds the greatsword overhanded and plunges it into the spine. The blade slips between two vertebra and severs the spinal cord, emerging out the other side. The lizard throws itself to one side, collapses and shudders, and doesn’t move.

Differel wills Caliburn away and goes to see Murina. Her arm is mangled and she has deep claw marks almost eviscerating her, but she is still alive. She is bleeding to death, but Differel can’t help her; she has no bandages or anything to make tourniquets with. She demands to see her toyboy. Differel helps her drag herself over. They speak last words together and kiss before he dies. Murina asks to stay with him. Differel can’t carry her back, so she offers to stay with her until the end. Differel tells her she never thanked her for saving her life. She wishes she could return the favor, but Murina waves her off, saying saving her people is repayment enough. However, she asks her to fulfill the last stanza of the prophecy and free her people.

Murina slips into unconsciousness and Differel takes her hand, but just then the rest of the fighters arrive, with a number of younger furries. The latter descend on Murina and begin bandaging her as the leader explains that, after they had left, Colomay had persuaded the headman and woman that the prophecy makes no claim that Differel was to slay the Dragon alone, only that her presence would bring about their freedom. They in turn persuaded the fighters to go after them to help. Though arriving too late to kill the Dragon, they might still save Murina. After she is bandaged, they return to the community, bearing Murina and the toyboy on litters and carrying a tooth from the Dragon as proof of its demise.

Upon their return, the headman and woman thank Differel for her saving them, and promise to reward her anyway they can. She then realizes that what she really needs—to go home—they can’t deliver. That’s when the PiO appears, now “normal” size. Though the furries are terrified, Differel is not surprised. She calms the furries down and tells the PiO she was wondering when she would show up. When the surprised PiO asks why she isn’t surprised, Differel replies that once she figured out this was just another game, she figured she would show up sooner or later. The PiO asks her how she figured it out. Differel explains that she did a good job keeping her occupied, but there were still times when she had a chance to think. She first realized something was amiss when she slept with the male warrior: his body seemed too solid, too strong, to be mouse-sized. Her fight with Murina reinforced that feeling, especially the way her own body moved: it didn’t react the way she would expect if she was trying to maneuver a body smaller than she was used to. Granted, if it really had been shrunken, her body would be weaker, but that wouldn’t affect her training, and not having had a chance to get used to her new size there should have been a certain hesitancy or exaggeration in her actions as she under or overreached herself. But it wasn’t until Caliburn first appeared to her that she realized what was wrong: if she was really smaller, the greatsword would have been gigantic and would have crushed her. The fact that it was normal size indicated she was too, as were the furries; instead, it was the house and everything else in it that had been enlarged to a gargantuan scale. As an aside, she states that once she figured all that out she suspected Murina might be the PiO in disguise, but she is not disappointed to be wrong about that one aspect.

The PiO flashes an evil leer and confirms that she is right. She further admits that it was a game, just one where she didn’t want her to know, as well as a test that was part of her evaluation. But having “won” she now can claim a prize; anything she wants. Differel doesn’t hesitate but asks that the mouse furries be freed from her, that they be returned to human form and sent back to their normal lives as if nothing had happened. The PiO smirks and suggests that she ask if that’s what they really want. Differel is annoyed at the formality but she tells the furries that if they wish, they can be restored to their former lives. As such, she is surprised when Colomay tells her that they never were human; rather, as she told her yesterday, they are descended from those who were. She herself was third generation when they escaped, and in her lifetime five more have passed since. This is the only world, the only life they have ever known; they have no knowledge of what being human is like, and no desire to find out. They are furries, not humans, and they are proud of that.

Differel is too flabbergasted to respond, but the PiO states that there is an uninhabited world she can send them to, one virtually identical to Earth of 150,000 years ago. It would have hardships and challenges, but none insurmountable and no worse than the first humans encountered. And they would be free; she gives her word that she will not interfere with their natural development. Only one thing: if Differel offers them this option, she cannot go home. She must go with them or stay as her pet for the rest of her life.

Differel hesitates, but then asks if the furries want to go to the new world. The furries all look at each other, as if daring anyone to speak first, but finally Colomay asks the headman and woman to call for a vote. The headman asks if anyone present objects to the Orange Devil’s offer. Before anyone speaks, Differel tells them that they would be starting all over again, on an unfamiliar world with strange, unknown dangers. It will be a struggle just to find water, food, to shelter and equip themselves, but they would be free, free to decide their own destiny and to build it. The headman once again asks if there are any objections, but no one speaks. He then asks who agrees, and everyone says yea. The headwoman announces the vote is unanimous in the affirmative. They will accept Her offer.

Colomay then asks Differel to come with them and lead them. She glances at the PiO, who gives her an expectant look. Differel responds that she cannot; she has obligations and duties she cannot abandon. Besides, they know better than she how to survive on their new world, and if they are to succeed they must do so on their own, by making their own mistakes and learning from them, even as they always have done. Colomay reminds her that the alternative is to live as the Orange Devil’s pet, but Differel states she understands and accepts that. A little girl furry asks if they will ever see her again. Differel glances at the PiO again, who beams a wicked half-grinning leer, and Differel tells her, “Maybe, someday.”

The PiO snaps her fingers and the furries vanish, along with all their tools and supplies, and the contents of Colomay’s study. The PiO tells Differel that the real point of the game was to see if she would put the welfare of the furries above her own; having done so, she has truly won. She asks what award she requests. Differel replies that Murina be completely healed; the PiO agrees, saying she will be hale and whole when they arrive. But again she is amazed that Differel would continue to think of others before herself, despite the consequences, especially reaffirming her desire to lead the Caerleon Order, despite her loathing for the job. She states that she will send her back. Differel is grateful, but when she asks if doing so is a reward or a punishment, the PiO only leers at her and snaps her fingers.

Margaret is speechless throughout Differel’s description, but she manages to find her tongue at the end. She finds it fantastic that all that happened to her in what was essentially the blink of an eye. Plus she’s never heard of this “Princess in Orange”. Differel replies that neither had she until she first appeared, and she describes her first three encounters. Latter, Eile and Sunny told her about their own encounter with a Carcosan Royal, and then Medb explained to her about the whole family, especially how the Princess tends to latch onto people and torment them off and on for years, usually for their entire lives. Medb likens her to a trickster god, while Sunny claims she’s more like Q from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Her analogy is Mr. Mxyzptlk from her father’s DC comics.

The PiO appears in a mirror over the room’s fireplace mantelpiece and states she likes that last. Differel introduces her to Margaret but won’t say Margaret’s name, but the PiO knows it already. Margaret asks if she’s really targeted Differel for torment, or if it’s just a temporary infatuation. The PiO denies she means to torment her, but otherwise yes. However, she is no ordinary plaything. The PiO explains that she loves playing games, especially those where the object is to solve some kind of puzzle by performing an action or making a decision that would be completely out of character or totally unrealistic in the given circumstances; something a player would never choose on her own, either because she would be morally or ethically opposed to it, or because it would be incredibly stupid and dangerous. Differel states that the problem is not knowing what needs to be done. The PiO remarks that that’s what makes the games exciting. When Margaret asks about just doing nothing, Differel explains that these “games” occur in reality, and so consequences, including death, are just as real and dangerous as they would be in “real life”. If she did nothing, she could be stuck in that alternate reality forever, and the Princess adds that if necessary she will restart her games over and over again until her players take action. Margaret asks what guarantee Differel has that she won’t cheat. The PiO replies that the honor of the game demands fair play; she’s not in it to win but to have fun, and cheating takes all the fun out of it.

In any event, Differel is a player like no other: not only eminently capable and fearless, but also stubborn enough to play to the bitter end if necessary. Which is why she is willing to reward her whenever she wins. Speaking of which, she points out that had Differel asked her to leave her alone forever, she would have complied. Differel responds that that is an empty taunt, since she knew ahead of time she’d never ask that. The PiO agrees, then flashes a sly smirk. She asks if Differel would like to see what became of the furries. She fears to answer, but Margaret says she wants to. The Princess throws her an evil grin just before her face vanishes and is replaced by a scene of a modern metropolis with pedestrians and cars, except the people are all mouse furries. The PiO supplies a voiceover in which she explains that she sent them back 150,000 years in time, and in that time they developed an advanced civilization on par with that of humans, with all the same hopes and terrors, the same triumphs and catastrophes. Whether they ultimately succeed or fail is still up in the air, but Differel can be proud of their achievements.

Only one difference: despite the existence of numerous sects as well as agnostics and atheists, the furries follow one universal religion, one based on a devil (an image of a demoniacal PiO flashes in the mirror) and a savior who has promised to return one day. Differel’s stomach turns to ice when an angelicized image of herself, complete with flaming sword, appears. The PiO tells them both she’ll visit again sometime soon, and the image vanishes.

Synopsis: The Machine Who Would Be a Man (a Team Girl adventure)

The girls are enjoying a pleasant walk in a park on a warm sunny day, when they see a robot walking towards them. People run from it, frightened. The girls recognize it as a Mabuse robot, but it is unlike the others they've seen. It's body is a perfectly formed humanoid, seamless and smooth, but with silvery-blue skin. It's face is also extremely plain, with two cameras for eyes and a small, circular speaker for a mouth. It heads straight for them, but it is not acting in a menacing manner, so while the girls are cautious, they stand their ground and wait for it.

When it reaches them, it does not attack, only stares at them for a few moments. Then it identifies them and states that it has confirmed their identities. Sunny asks it who it is; it responds by starting to say that its designation is Model X400 - Generation I, but then it changes its mind and says it's name is Xerxes. When Eile asks what it wants with them, it states that Mabuse has instructed it to seek them out if anything happened to her. Sunny asks if anything has happened to her, and the robot explains that she was taken away by military agents. When Eile asks why Mabuse told it to find them, it states that she claimed they would protect it. The girls are too flabbergasted to respond, but then they hear the sirens of approaching police cars. They decide on the spur of the moment to take a chance and escort Xerxes home. When they express concern about hiding it, it directs them to start walking and it will follow. When they do, it seems to disappear. A closer look shows it has a faint outline, like a heat distortion, and they realize it must be bending light rays around itself. As they walk out of the park, they are detained by soldiers, who scan around them with some kind of device, but finally they are let through. From behind them, Xerxes explains that the device was designed to detect it when invisible, but Mabuse had modified its camouflage ability before she was taken away.

When they reach home, Xerxes reverts to a normal appearance. The girls are uncomfortable having it around but being as it has made no threatening moves, Sunny treats it as a guest, telling it to make itself comfortable and offering it something to eat or drink. It politely declines her efforts at hospitality. Eile asks why Mabuse felt they could protect it; it responds that it does not know because she did not say, only that she was confident they could. Her frustration mounting, Eile asks if Mabuse gave it any instructions at all on what they were suppose to do now, and the robot reveals that she had recorded a message for it to play back. It then raises a hand, palm up, and a holographic image of Mabuse's head appears.

"Sunny and Eile. If you are listening to this recording, it means I am dead, incapacitated, or captured, and that Xerxes has sought you out and contacted you as per my instructions. He represents the summit of my achievements in robotics: a fully-functional, self-aware artificial intelligence. My reasons for sending him to you are two-fold. The first is the hope that you will protect him from those who would seek to exploit him for their narrow-minded purposes. The second is the hope that you will continue his education. I have been training and instructing him myself, but it is difficult for me to gauge his level of development, because while he has the knowledge-base of a postgraduate with a half-dozen doctorates, in many ways he is still just a child. For example, he is severely lacking in social skills, largely based on my own lack thereof, though I have taught him courtesy and etiquette, and ethics. I would understand if you decided to turn him over to the care of Medb, but for as long as he is with you, I would appreciate it if you taught him those things I was incapable of. My goal was for him to be able to fully integrate himself into human society as if he was born and raised human, and I can think of no better teachers than yourselves. It had been my intention to ask you to do this at a future date in any event, but it would appear that some disruptive event has forced an acceleration of my schedule. I am truly sorrow if you have been thrust into this situation completely unaware and unprepared, but please believe me, I had no choice. Also, let me reassure you that he is safe. To demonstrate this, I wish to provide you with the Administrative Override codes. The first will allow you to override all but his most basic, hardwired programming; in short, he will obey your every command without question or hesitation. The second will cancel the override and return him to full autonomy. However, you should know that, as a self-aware being, he will object to being controlled, as either of you would if you were in his place. If he does anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or threatened, simply ask him to stop. I think you will find he is an extremely eager and cooperative student."

When the recording stops, Eile decides she had better contact Medb. Sunny is uncertain, but doesn't object. Sunny then asks Xerxes to stay in the living room while she takes care of something. She feeds Snowshoe Kitty, then stops off in the conservatory to play the piano. Xerxes startles her and she explains that it is polite to announce one's presence. He expresses an interest in her music. While he knows what it is, he has never heard it before; Mabuse has not exposed him to it. Sunny plays a piece, and then he asks if she would teach him. She runs through the basic scales and other preliminaries, which he reproduces without errors. She plays Chopsticks, which he also reproduces. Then she plays the Moonlight Sonata. Partway through he joins in, and as they play he picks up more and more, until they are playing a duet by the end. Eile joins them, saying that Medb will arrive next morning. She and Sunny then jam while Xerxes listens. When he takes over from Sunny, he imitates her exactly. Sunny and Eile explain about freeform expression and play again. This time, when Xerxes takes over he improvises instead of imitates, and he gets better at it as they continue. Sunny picks up her violin and they jam together for some time.

The jam session is interrupted when Kitty jumps onto the piano. Xerxes asks about her, and the girls explain about pets. When he mentions that Mabuse informed him Kitty was sapient, the girls warn him never to speak of it again to anyone, not even them. Though he does not understand, he agrees. The girls then take him to the media room where they play music CDs for him. They start to dance to some of the music, and he asks about that. They show him some moves, but explain it's like freeform jamming. He begins to dance, awkward at first, but with increasing grace. They go to make some lunch and he follows them to watch, so they explain about cooking. Afterwards they go to Eile's office and do some design work; they explain about graphic design to Xerxes, who helps them with a difficult project. Finally they take him into the library and let him read through their books while they go down to the basement to do some exercising.

Later, while Sunny is doing her aerobics and Eile her boxing exercises, Xerxes comes down. He announces his presence, then explains he has gone through their entire library and read every book. Sunny makes an offhand remark that normally they exercise naked, but with him around they decided they shouldn't. He startles them by declaring he already knows what they look like naked, then explains he surveyed their bodies and reconstructed them without clothes, filling in what he couldn't see with what he knew of human female anatomy. Sunny gets angry and tells him he shouldn't do that, but Eile takes it more philosophically, saying men undress them in their minds all the time so why should he be any different. Eile then offers to teach Xerxes how to box. He learns quickly, and they discover that he has immense strength.

After they clean up, the girls have a light supper, then say that they normally take a walk before retiring. Xerxes turns himself invisible so he can go with them, and they take a tour around the cemetery. Xerxes asks about death. The girls explain as best as they can, but it is obvious they have no clue what it really is. He then plays a recording of a conversation he had with Mabuse about personal identity, in which she revealed there were profound mysteries about self-awareness no one knew the answers to. It does, however, convince the girls that Xerxes is telling the truth. When he asks how, they say they are taking it on faith. When he asks about faith, they states that is another concept no one can really explain.

When they return, they teach Xerxes how to play poker. Sunny remarks they normally play strip poker, but tonight they'll play for pocket change. They then retire, after showing him their huge DVD library. Instead of going to sleep, however, they decide to have sex. At a particularly energetic stage, Xerxes bursts in on them. Covering themselves with pillows, Sunny reminds him that he's supposed to announce himself first. He apologizes, but explains he heard their cries and thought they were in trouble, which they actually consider somewhat amusing. He asks what they were doing and they reply they were having sex. He asks why, and they explain they do it to express their mutual affection, as well as for fun. He then states that Mabuse showed him what sex was and asks how two women could do it. Without going into details they explain that sex is simply the erotic stimulation of the genitals and other areas of the body, hence it isn't strictly limited to male-female couples.

He asks that they demonstrate. Eile refuses at first, but Sunny asks if he feels titillated. He explains that he understands what that means, and being sentient he appreciates what that is supposed to feel like, but in lacking sexual organs or hormones, or even a sexual drive in his artificial brain, he cannot feel it himself. His interest is strictly academic, even objective. He is, in a word, curious. Sunny convinces Eile to help her give him a demonstration by reminding her they are suppose to teach him about the human condition, and sex is a big part of that. In any event, he won't be aroused, so it's no different than having sex with Kitty in the room. They start over and proceed all the way to climax, collapsing beside each other. Xerxes thanks them, then comments that while Mabuse's act of sex with her male partner could be described as strictly physical, it is obvious even to him just how deeply the girls love and care for each other. He then leaves them alone. The girls snuggle together and cuddle, and discuss the irony of having a machine tell them what they should have already known themselves.

Mabuse is secured, naked, to an exam table, hooked up to a torture device she invented. Col. Torain Thegn is using it to force her to reveal where she hid her robot. So far she has refused to talk, but she knows that it is only a matter of time. She just hopes the girls turn Xerxes over to Medb before then.

Medb arrives in the morning in time for breakfast. They tell her about everything that happened the day before. She is suspicious, thinking the robot is a mole meant to gain their trust before it then carries out whatever order Mabuse gave it. She might be willing to give it the benefit the doubt if it really were self-aware, but she doubts it's true. She interviews Xerxes using the override code Mabuse gave the girls, trying to get him to reveal his true programming, but he states that if her suspicions were correct, it could be hardwired, in which case he would be no more aware of them than she would her own genetically controlled instincts.

The girls then ask him to play music with them, but Medb declares he could have been programmed that way. Sunny asks if he could be programmed for freeform expression. When she expresses doubt that he could, the girls demonstrate he has that ability by jamming with him. Medb is surprised, but then suggests he could be programmed to play musical phrases from a huge library using an analysis program to determine which phrase is appropriate. She is however sufficiently intrigued to test him herself. She teaches him fidhcheall, an ancient Irish board game, which no one other than the girls should know. He picks it up immediately. They play a game, in which she trounces him. The next game ends in a draw, and in the third he beats her soundly. She decides he must be self-aware, and accepts that he is telling the truth. She asks him to swear on his honor. When he asks, she explains what it means, and about the Irish warrior code. He decides to adopt it as his philosophy of life.

Medb offers to take him away to a place of safety, but he refuses. He instead states that he intends to rescue Mabuse, and he asks Medb and the girls to help him. He states he knows where she is being held, that he found out last night using the girls' computer after they went to sleep. He was even able to download floor plans, details on security measures, and other things needed to break in. He then affirms that he will go after her with or without their help. Medb reviews the information he collected and decides a rescue mission may be possible. Before they leave, however, Xerxes asks Sunny to use the override code, then order him to reveal his secret. When she does, his cranium splits open and he removes a data block, which he claims has all of Mabuse's research notes from the start of her career. He wants the girls to have it.

Col. Thegn consults with Lt. Gen. Morgan Leia Ross. Gen. Ross orders him to use sodium thiopental to loosen her tongue while under torture.

That evening, Eile goes up to the gatehouse of the government facility, disguised as a pizza delivery girl (she has a DiGiorno pizza). She claims to have a delivery for someone in the building, but the guards deny anyone called her. She convinces them to buy the pizza with a sob-story that if she takes it back it'll come out of her salary. After eating a slice each, the guards fall asleep. Medb and the girls enter the facility and proceed to the ventilation system. The girls crawl inside while she goes to the front entrance and demands entry. Col. Thegn lets her in and escorts her to Mabuse. While she distracts him, the girls make it to the interrogation room and drop tear gas into it. Medb places a mask over Mabuse and Xerxes appears, rips off her restraints, and picks her up. The girls join them and they all flee, the girls covering them using tear gas and Medb taking out any guards or robots that try to stop them.

They make it out into the parking lot, but are confronted by a squad of soldiers. Medb creates a distraction and they make it to cover, but they are pinned down. Mabuse recovers enough to realize what is going on. Xerxes tells Medb to get her away; he will engage and hold the soldiers. Mabuse refuses to allow him and tries to use the override code, but Xerxes silences her by repeating the Irish warrior code: loyalty, bravery, and generosity. He then attacks the soldiers, moving fast, turning invisible in quick blinks, and using the boxing skill he learned from Eile. While the girls run interference, Medb carries Mabuse out of the facility's grounds. As they reach the van they came in, the area is rocked by an explosion that destroys half the parking lot and demolishes the front of the building. Medb drives them away as the girls speculate about Xerxes's fate.

Medb returns to the girls' house and Mabuse is installed in the guest bedroom. Medb will stay to nurse her back to health. Gen. Ross arrives, alone, and confirms that Xerxes destroyed himself to allow Mabuse to get away. She then asks Mabuse to work for her again after she has recovered, but Mabuse refuses. Medb offers Mabuse a job at her institute, which she accepts. Medb does make a deal with Ross, however, to work on projects for her, but only those Medb finds intriguing. Before she leaves, Ross congratulates the girls on a successful operation, and hints that she may offer them assignments as well, if they are interested. After she is gone, Sunny gives Mabuse the data block given to her by Xerxes. She explains that she thinks he gave it to her because he planned his self-sacrifice before they even left to rescue her. Medb and the girls then leave her alone to rest. Unknown to them, Snowshoe Kitty is in the room, and she is the only one who sees a tear run down Mabuse's cheek.

Hey, Big Nose! Cyrano de Bergerac

Cyrano de Bergerac was an actual historical figure, a playwright, poet, and duelist with a prominent nose. He is perhaps most famous for his work of science fiction, The Other World: The Comical History of the States and Empires of the Moon. Like the fictional Cyrano, he fought at the siege of Arras during the Thirty Years' War, but when he was a very young man, not middle aged as in the play by Edmond Rostand. Also, he died at the age of 36, not in old age.

For more information, see this article.

New eBook: Double Image

I have just published my final ebook:

The Adventure of the Double Image

Dr. Mabuse has figured out a way to pierce the dimensional barriers between parallel universes and open portals onto alternative Earths. When she finds such a world, she hires Eile and Sunny to perform a preliminary, 24-hour investigation, based on their experience with their adventuring company Team Girl Inc., their special ops missions for Lt. Gen. Morgan Leia Ross, and their time in the Dreamlands. Based on their report, Mabuse and her sponsor Medb will decide whether to perform more in-depth investigations, with an eye towards possible exploitation.

These initial investigations can be hazardous, but in this case their danger stems from a case of mistaken identity, when they are confused with their in-world counterparts. Then this resemblance is ruthlessly exploited when they are blackmailed into playing decoy for them. They have no choice, not if they hope to get home in one piece. They just hope their latest adventure doesn't get them both killed.

This ebook is free and can be downloaded from Smashwords.