Pat Bertram's Blog, page 291

Describing the Nondescript

Lately I've been coming across the word "nondescript" in novels. "Nondescript" is a perfectly ordinary word and shouldn't raise my hackles, but it does. Most recently, I found this: "He caught a glimpse of a man running out of an alley, dressed like a local in nondescript clothes," and what should have been a tense moment turned into one of cogitation. What are nondescript clothes? Since this story was taking place in Brazil, are Brazilian nondescript clothes the same as those in Thailand or Canada or the United States? Was he wearing baggy white cotton pants and a loose-fitting top?  Was he wearing jeans and a tee shirt? Shorts and a polo shirt? A suit and tie?

The author was a writer (not as much of an oxymoron as one might think since celebrity authors so often have someone else do their writing) and should have been able to come up with some way of describing the nondescript. Perhaps she could have said, "he was dressed like a local in loose white clothes." Or she could have said, "He was dressed like a local in jeans and a bright-colored shirt." Or he was dressed like a local in . . . well, no need to go on. You get the picture. Which is exactly the problem with "nondescript." You don't get a picture. You get a weasel word that fills space but gives you no idea of what to imagine.

I checked my manuscripts, and to my chagrin, I discovered I used "nondescript" twice. In Daughter Am I, I wrote, Mary glanced from Iron Sam to Tim then back at the road, goose bumps stippling her arms. How odd to think this nondescript bit of tarmac bound the three of them together. Actually, that's not a bad use of nondescript, because how does one describe a stretch of tarmac on a interstate? Perhaps "ordinary" would have been a better word choice. Or perhaps I could have left off the adjective and just said, How odd to think this bit of tarmac bound the three of them together.

In A Spark of Heavenly Fire, I wrote: The bartender, a lank-haired individual with grooves of discontent etched on his otherwise nondescript face, continued to polish a glass. Hmmm. There is a bit of an image here, but still, I could have found some bit of description for his face. Or maybe not. Faces do tend to blend one into the other. Still, "undistinguished" would have been a better word choice.

At least I got rid of "nondescript car." My hero in More Deaths Than One bought an old beat-up Volkswagen, and I called it nondescript. At one time such a car might have been nondescript, but now? Yikes — such a car would have attracted attention. Better for him to have bought a white sedan that looked like half the cars on the road.

So, this is my point: if you're a writer, rethink "nondescript." I'm sure you can come up with a bit of description to show that the nondescript isn't so nondescript after all.

Tagged: description, nondescript, nondescript clothes, ordinary, word usage

Angie's Diary — A Great Site For Readers and Writers

Continuing my series of introductions to the residents of my online world, tonight I'm spotlighting Angie's Diary. I met Angelica Pastorelli on Facebook (see, fb really is good for something!!) and now I am a regular contributor to Angie's Diary, an online writing magazine to help authors get read.

Most recently I've posted a few interviews:

Interview With Deborah J. Ledford (Snare and Staccato)

Interview with Mickey Hoffman (School of Lies)

Interview with Dellani Oakes (Lone Wolf)

Interview: Malcolm R. Campbell (Sarabande)

and these articles:

How to Use a Character Profile

Will Traditional Ways of Selling Books Remain Effective?

Why Do People Get Married?

I've also posted a few other articles, including some from last year that are still available in the archives, and I hope to continue posting articles and especially interviews. Interviews are good — I get to promote people I admire, and I don't have to think of something entertaining or interesting to say.

Tagged: Angelica Pastorelli, Angie's Diary, interviews, online writing magazine, readers and writers [image error]

Another Great Blog to Bookmark!

If you haven't checked out the Second Wind Blog, you're missing out on a treat. With more than fifteen writers posting articles, there is something for every taste, from Noah Baird's hilarious take on life to JJ Dare's more philosophical bent, from Sherrie Hansen's inspirational articles to Norm Brown's blend of mysticism and reality. Here you can find contests, interviews and excerpts. You can even find me occasionally!!! So what are you waiting for? Stop by Second Wind Publishing Blog and check it out. Here are a few great articles to get you started:

DO YOU GESTALT? by Nancy A. Niles talks about role playing to get to know your characters.

Traveling Thoughts by Mairead Walpole talks about the magic of the Florida sun.

Top of the World at Just the Right Moment by Norm Brown talks about a stunning moment when he was in the right place at the right time. And check out his classic Do Not Lean, which was "Fresh Pressed" here on WordPress.

The Trouble With Birthdays by J. Conrad Guest is a celebration of life, baseball, and summer. And If the Novel is Dying, What's That Say About Imagination? is a celebration of reading.

Writer Beware–POV Confusion/Character Overload by Juliet Waldron explains the dangers of too many point of view shifts.

Chemistry and Subtext by Lucy Balch tells how writers can enhance the budding romances in their books.

How living in Germany Helped Me Become a Better Writer by Coco Ihle talks about the importance of detailing subjects familiar to the author, but possibly unique or unconventional to someone else.

The Joys of Lying to Children by Noah Baird I had a hard time choosing which Noah Baird post to highlight, but lying to children is perhaps even funnier than Vasectomies For Beginners by Noah Baird. Or not.

Compelled to Compare by Sherrie Hansen talks about appreciating what she has, both as a woman and a writer, but my favorite is Don't Keep Me Hanging Too Long!

Are You Happy? by J J Dare talks about being happy and feeling heated rush the assassin feels right after he pulls the trigger. Um, yeah. You'll have to read the post. Or this read this one instead: Goodbye, Mr. Phobia by J J Dare.

Writing what you know by Nichole Bennett talks about writing what you're comfortable with and researching the rest.

On Butt Glue, Diplomacy, and Lying: Lessons Learned by Laura Wharton talks about the lessons she learned in her first year as a published writer.

Isabella's Smile and the Miracle in Dakota Park — by Calvin Davis is a delight parable for writers and everyone who needs a bit of assurance that sometimes the impossible is really possible.

Excuse me? What? by Dellani Oakes talks about the ways in which writing is like childbirth. If you're an author, you will probably agree.

Killer Cocktail Events in Minnesota by Christine Husom talks about the Midwest Booksellers Association annual trade show. Be sure to stop by and tell her about trade shows you've gone to.

Interview With Deborah J Ledford, Author of Snare and Staccato

Excerpt From "School of Lies" by Mickey Hoffman

and don't forget the Second Wind Short Story Contest!! The deadline is December 31, 2011, so you still have plenty of time to enter.

Tagged: baseball, great blog, humor, imagination, Inspiration, magic, Second Wind blog, writing [image error]

Be Sure to Bookmark Malcolm's Book Bits Blog

Malcolm Campbell is one of the most intelligent people I have met online, one of the most prolific reader/reviewers, absolutely one of the best novelists (Jock Stewart and the Missing Sea of Fire, The Sun Singer, Sarabande) and one of the all time great bloggers.

To add to his already remarkable list of blogs (Sun Singer's Travels, Malcolm's Round Table, Sarabande's Journey, Morning Satirical News, and probably several I've forgotten) he's now added Malcolm's Book Bits and  Notions, where he collects and posts links to articles you would read if you knew they were out there to read.

He lists contests such as WOW! Women On Writing Fall 2011 Flash Fiction Contest, entry fee $10, deadline Nov 30 2011, first place prize $350, 250 to 750 words, number of entries is limited to 300.

He lists feature articles, such as Amazon Signs Up Authors, Writing Publishers Out of Deal – "Amazon.com has taught readers that they do not need bookstores. Now it is encouraging writers to cast aside their publishers."

He makes note of reviews, such as Radioactive: Marie & Pierre Curie, A Tale of Love and Fallout by Lauren Redniss, reviewed by Jesse Kornbluth

He gives us something to think of with viewpoints such as Privacy Policy, On the public commodification of privacy by Stefany Anne Golberg

Why isn't everyone bookmarking this site or following it? It's one of the best book bits blogs out there. And of course, why wouldn't it be? Malcolm Campbell runs the blog.

(Can you tell I'm a fan? You should be, too.)

Tagged: Book News, Malcolm Campbell, Malcolm's Book Bits and Notions, Malcolm's Round Table, Morning Satirical News, Sarabande's Journey, Sun Singer's Travels

The Editor's Blog — A Remarkable Resource for All Writers

[image error]I'm almost hesitant to post this, because once you have found this remarkable resource for writers, you won't need me anymore. (Well, except for friendship, of course!) Beth Hill, who maintains this blog is both writer and editor. Her editing focus is on long fiction, primarily novels. Beth says, "I love the written word, the ability we have to create worlds and emotions with well-chosen phrases. It's my intention to share tips and insights and encouragement with writers at all levels, to help you craft  stories that will entertain and satisfy your readers. That will help satisfy you as writer as well."

So, be sure to bookmark her blog, The Editor's Blog, where you will find everything you need to know about writing and writing well. Here is the current list of her articles:

A Novel Ending
Add Poetry to Your Prose—Write with Flair
Anyone Can Write a Book
Assess Your Writing Skills—Turn Weaknesses to Strengths
Beyond the Basics—Push the Story and Push Yourself
Character Reaction—Make Your Characters Respond
Character Voices Shouldn't Sound Like Yours
Checklist for Editors
Clear and Simple Writing Advice
Clichés–Are They Really That Bad?
Clothe Characters Well—Choose Words that Fit
Comma Splice—A Common Writing Mistake
Common Writing Mistakes
Conflict—Beyond Arguments and Fist Fights
Convincing Readers Your Fiction is Real
Creating Emotion in the Reader
Creating Fictional Characters
Creative Genius vs. Editing Witch
Dangling Modifiers—A Common Writing Mistake
Dealing with Discouragement
Deliver the Payoff
Detail Enhances Your Fiction
Dialogue—The Speech of Fiction

Don't Fear the Semicolon—It's a Useful Writing Tool
Don't Let Your Writing Be Ordinary
Don't Write the Bland and the Boring
Edit in an Instant? Ain't Gonna Happen
Engage Readers Through Character Reaction
Equip Your Characters
Finding Commas in All the Wrong Places
First Impressions and Introductions
Forget the Writing Rules
Format Your Novel for Submission
Head-Hopping Gives Readers Whiplash
Hedge Words
How Goes the Flow in Your Story?
How to Hook Your Readers
How to Respond to Rejections & Negative Feedback
How to Write a Novel
Invite Readers into Your Story
Keys to Writing Better Fiction
Kill Soulless Writing
Lay and Lie—When to Use Which?
Let it Flow
Like vs. As
Literary vs. Genre Fiction
Maintain Point of View
Male Writers & Female Writers—There's a Difference in the Writing
Mastering Scene Transitions
Misused Words—Common Writing Mistakes
More Punctuation in Dialogue—A Reader's Questions
Multi-Tasking Characters or Impossible Actions?
New Experiences? Use Them in Your Writing
No Comma Necessary—Coordinating Conjunctions Don't Always Need Commas
Novelist as Director…And as So Much More
On Grammar and Punctuation
One-Manuscript Diva or Working Novelist?
Participial Phrases? C'mon, You Made that Up
Plot Basics—The Events of Story
Plot, Setting, and Character—Fiction's Top 3
Pros and Cons of Prologue
Punctuation in Dialogue
Reference Books for Writers
Resolution—Tying up the Ends
Rules of Grammar & Punctuation—The Weird, Odd, or Unfamiliar
Sagging, Soggy Middles
Self-Editing Tips
Setting—The Place and Time of Story
Sex in Fiction—Do They or Don't They?
Should I Use Absolute Phrases? Absolutely
Show and Tell—Not Just a Game We Play
Single Quotation Marks—A Reader's Question
Story-specific Words—Fitting Word to Story
Style Sheets—The Setup and the Benefits
Sub-plots, Main Plots, and Digressions
Subtext—Revelation of the Hidden
Take Off the Brakes—Write Boldly
The Elements of Fiction—The Basics & Beyond
The First Book is Seldom the Best
The First Draft—What it is and What it isn't
The Mean, the Bad, and the Nasty—Writing Villains
The Outline Dilemma—Plotting vs. Pantsing
The Power of Repetition
The Princess Bride—Storytelling Done Right
The Psychology of Character
The Sterile Story—Don't Write Another One
The Ubiquitous, Wandering It
Tips for Writers—The Down and Dirty
Use and Misuse of Dialogue Tags
Use Words, Not Punctuation, To Tell Your Story
Using Time Wisely
Viewpoint Character and the Need to Choose Wisely
What is Theme
Where Should a Second Chapter Start?
Why Write a Novel—Your Reason is the Right One
Why Writing "The End" Doesn't Mean You've Finished
Word Choices—Contractions and Dialect
Write for Your Readers
Write Scenes Rather Than Reports
Write What You Know? Maybe Not
Writer's Block—Real or Imaginary?
Writers Are World Creators
Writers Need Friends and Critics
Writing Basics—The Paragraph
Writing for the Emotions
You Can't Hook a Reader with a Yawn
You Got My Attention, But Where's the Action?
Your Character's Code


Tagged: articles about writing, Beth Hill, editing, resource for writers, The Editor's Blog [image error]

I'm Declaring This Blog Reader Appreciation Day

[image error]As most of you know, this has been a hard couple of years for me. I watched my life mate (soul mate, business partner, best friend) die slowly of inoperable kidney cancer. I survived months of grueling grief. I left my home to take care of my 94-year-old father. I've struggled to keep from being swallowed up in the quicksand of emotion and trauma.

Through it all, you've been here for me. I want you to know how much every comment, every word of support, every story you shared has meant to me. Even those of you who have never left a comment (so I was never able to thank you personally) have helped me get through this terrible time because I knew you were there, suffering your own traumas. Your presence made me feel as if we were going through this journey together.

And perhaps we are going through this journey together. We are so often in competition with each other we forget that in some intangible way, we are connected one to the other. The internet, though it does sometimes keep us from connecting in the offline world, keeps us connected in a more ethereal way. The internet and computers are fueled by electrons, and so are we.  Somehow the two streams of electrons manage to collide. How else to explain the very real connections we have made though many miles — sometimes half a world — separate us?

So, thank you. Thank you for holding out a virtual hand and keeping me from sinking. Thank you for reading my blog, for caring, for connecting. Thank you for being part of my stream of electrons.

Tagged: connectedness, grief, loss, quicksand, stream of electrons, thank you [image error] [image error] [image error]

Proving to Myself That I'm Real

I'm still struggling with the sense of loss that the death of my long time mate created in me. It's not just that I lost him – I feel as if I've lost a sense of reality, a sense of my reality.

During the first months of almost unbearable pain, I felt that the situation itself was unreal. Part of me couldn't believe he was dead (though I knew he was — I watched him die). It seems strange now, but accompanying the disbelief was a belief that something wonderful would soon happen to me, perhaps because I needed to believe good would come to balance the unbelievable wrongness of his absence. I no longer hold myself tensed against the reality of his death (though it does still tear through me at times), but I also no longer have that sense of an imminent good. What I'm left with is a feeling of waiting, though I don't know what I'm waiting for.

This feeling of being in limbo seems to be a common stage of grief for those of us past the first year. So many of us are struggling with it, trying to find . . . a new reality, perhaps.

I'm not a sentimental person. I seldom kept keepsakes and I never chronicled my life with photos, but now I do both to prove to myself that yes, I am alive, and yes, I am doing something with my years. I've recently started a scrapbook of paper memories. Perhaps someday I will feel a sense of reality again, but if I don't, I can look at the book and know the truth of it. I am real.

    [image error]    

Tagged: feeling of being in limbo, grief, I am alive, losing a sense of my reality, loss, scrapbook [image error]

What Does Not Destroy Us Makes Us Stronger. Or Weaker. Or More Fearful

[image error]Nietzsche said, "What does not destroy me makes me stronger." I'm not sure if that is strictly true. Sometimes that which doesn't destroy us makes us makes us weaker because it makes us fearful of living, fearful of more trauma, fearful of fear itself.

Eleanor Roosevelt said, "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

In life, we often have to do the thing we think we cannot do. Too many times during the past eighteen months I've felt that I can't survive the pain of losing my life mate (we were together for 34 years). Panic kept washing over me, as if I'd been set down in the middle of an alien world with no idea how to deal with all the horror being thrown at me. I feared every new step, every change. I'd been especially fearful of growing old alone. Sometimes I still am. I've seen what dying can do. It's a terrible way to end one's life, and it seems even more terrible when one has to face it alone. Of course, there's a chance that it will be decades before I have to face the grim reaper, and who knows what will happen until then?!

Well, I do know one thing that will happen: this discussion about life, writing, and the writing life!

So, what do you fear? How do you deal with your fear?

If you are a writer, how does that fear work its way into your stories? What do your characters fear? How do they deal with the fear? Is the fear a plot driver, something that drives the story forward or is it more of a subplot, a way of developing your character? Is the fear justified? Is the fear realized? (I mean, does the thing the character fear happen, and if not, why not?) How does the character deal with the fear? How does the fear change the character? How does facing his/her fear change the character?

Tagged: Eleanor Roosevelt, fear, fear of death, Nietzsche, what are you afraid of, what do your characters fear [image error]

What To Do When One of Your Beloved Pieces of Art Glass or Pottery Gets Broken

What do you do when one of your beloved pieces of art glass or pottery gets broken?

It breaks your heart to have to throw it away, but what else can you do with it?

Don't throw it away!! Plant it in your garden.

They make wonderful accent pieces. And you can continue to enoy their beauty.[image error]

I wish this had been my idea, but I'm only passing it along.

The glassware collection and the idea of planting broken pieces of art glass and pottery are my sister's.

I'm only posting the photos I took in the hopes that you enjoy her pottery garden as much as I did.

Tagged: art glass, broken glassware, garden accents, glass collection, pottery [image error] [image error]

Gotta Love That Spam!!

I always check my spam folder here on WordPress, partly because some real comments have gotten lost in that black hole, and partly because they tickle me. Whoever is posting these things needs to get a better translator program. (Or perhaps all such programs are faulty?)

This particular bit of spam almost makes sense:

Halloween outfits usually are costume worn out around or on Evening, your event which in turn drops regarding Oct 31st. A Costume carries a fairly limited history. Dressed in costume has long been regarding some other vacations at about the time from Evening, possibly even The holiday season. Some of the earliest referrals that will being dressed in costume located at Evening is within 1895, exactly where "guisers" usually are announced inside Scotland, reliable almost no reference to a dressing up inside Uk, Ireland in Europe, or perhaps the Us until eventually 1900. Early on costume highlighted the actual questionable plus medieval design of this getaway, however , through thirties costume depending on characters inside advertising that include silver screen, literature, plus airwaves were definitely favorite. Evening has been actually touted to provide a children's getaway, as a method from reining while in the licentious plus damaging behavior from students. Early on Halloween outfits were definitely aimed at youngsters for example, however , following your mid-20th centuries, just as Evening significantly came to be famed by simply older people, the actual Costume has been worn out by simply older people perhaps up to youngsters.

And here's the ever popular Hey Dude:

Hey, Dude. My group is not considerably into searching at, but somehow I acquired to read several articles on your weblog. Its great how interesting it's for me to pay a visit to you fairly often.

Others make no sense at all:

Post Standard,mmodern care forget big take afternoon as element totally requirement energy line step paper focus obviously occur used himself figure not threaten reaction perhaps new favour late hurt flat wife crowd recall empty rich protect weapon insist total ago rule train international treatment reaction trade weekend directly tree explore damage revolution during aircraft fear recover politics component actually who for have absolutely work comment notice examine museum main result planning until avoid herself correct sky dress target step connect cold growth beautiful alone meaning insurance deep largely leg hard division.

And some are just fun:

I agree with most of your points, but a couple of want to be discussed further, I will hold a small speak with my partners and perhaps I will appear for you some suggestion soon.

So here's a small speak for the big spammers: Hey, Dude, don't make it bad. Take your spam and make it better.

Tagged: blog spam, comment spam, halloween, halloween costumes, WordPress [image error] [image error]