Preeti Shenoy's Blog, page 47

6 things you can do when all fails (blog marathon post 5)

When things go wrong in your life it is very easy to keep focussing on that. To keep complaining.
Often, this complaining stems up from the sheer helplessness of the situation. That point when you reach the i-don't-know-what-to-do-anymore point. Nothing that you do seems to help change the situation. You have tried every single solution that you possibly can. It is totally out of your control. What can you do then?

Here are 6 things that you CAN do


1.Focus on the things going right: Often we forget about things that are going right for us. Do you have a roof over your head? Great! There are 78 million homeless people in India. Do you have a job? Fabulous! There are 47 million unemployed  youth in India. And you say that you have problems?
2.Refuse to talk or think about it:
 If you have tried every possible thing that you can do, then put a FULL STOP to your thoughts and to your mouth. Refuse to talk about it. The moment you find yourself cribbing to your spouse or friends or closest ones, the ones who are 'duty-bound' or bound out of love to listen to how hard it is for you and how helpless you are, ask yourself to shut the f*** up. STOP ! There is nothing more you can do.


3.Exercise:
 Why will exercise help when you have an issue in your hand that you can do nothing about? Well, exercise releases in your body, the feel good endorphins. It fights depression. It makes you fitter. It helps you burn off that plum cake you gobbled as it was so tasty that you couldn't resist eating it. Also it makes you so tired so you don't toss and turn in bed, trying to fall asleep thinking about your problem.


4.Meet new people:
Go out and socialise. Get off the social media. Stop looking at other people's pictures and thinking about how great their lives are and why is it that things are going wrong only with you. Everybody is happy on facebook. Go join a class which you always wanted to. Go visiti a friend you have been forever meaning to catch up with. If you have a chance to meet new people, please grab it and do so. It will give you a different perspective about life, take your mind off the issue that you can do nothing about.


5.Do something you have never done before:
  When I found myself utterly helpless about a situation that I was facing one time, I joined ashtanga yoga. It is something I have never done before, even though I have practised yoga for more than  30 years. It gave me focus, concentration and made me the fittest i have ever been in my life. I out all my energies into that and ignored the issue that i had no solution for and that i could do nothing about. I just took one day at a time and kept going till a solution emerged.


6.Time solves everything:

Please remember that no matter how much ever you try to 'solve a problem' there is a time for it to be solved. There is sweet nothing you can do till it is time. Sometimes leaving a thing alone is the best solution.


If you find the stuff I share useful, please feel free to forward this post to your friends. If you want to get my posts in your inbox, enter your email-id in the box on the right.
And yes, don't forget to leave me a comment after you read. I like hearing from you :) Comments always make me smile :)  Honest.

___________________________________________________________________
Like what you read?
Buy my books, you will love them:   http://is.gd/preetibooks
 Get my latest non-fiction book on relationships at just Rs.175/- : Bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

A Million Shades of Crimson (Blog marathon post 4)

Today's post is a poem I wrote.




A million shades of Crimson

How can something so beautiful be grey? 
It is a million shades. 
Of Crimson  
Of Golden  
Of Blue 
Of Green 
Of colours that don't have a name 
And of colours that do. 


How can something so dazzling 
Be defined by or confined to 
Relationships formed with people 
Which society likes to give a name to 
In a quest to understand. 
Neatly labelled 
Slotted. 
Marriage, husband, wife, In-laws. 


Within the confines of those narrow spaces 
Bursts forth a certain something. 
Magnificent in its splendor. 
Yet invisible  
Indefinable 
Incomprehensible 
Something you only feel. 
Something more precious than life itself 


A myriad colours  
And a million shades of Crimson. ________________________________________________
© 2015 Preeti Shenoy
 For more poems click here. Some poems have already appeared in print. Kindly do not reproduce without permission.
Buy my book 'It happens for a reason' at a great price
Buy Why We Love The Way We Do at a great price too: Bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

5 myths on happiness (Blog marathon post 3)

As promised in yesterday's post, here is what i think are the top 5 myths about happiness.

1. You should be close to perfect: Nobody is. Nobody can be. No matter how much you try, there will always be somebody who is fitter, richer, more smart, cleverer and their lives will seem ideal and perfect. But what you have to remember is you are looking at only a single dimension of their lives. You can never be *perfect*. And you don’t have to be, in order to be happy.

2. Others should behave how you want them to: Another myth that most people buy into is that you would be happy if ___________ behaved in a certain way. If only he would_______ or If only she would____________.(Fill in the blanks suitably). Thing is you do not control anybody’s behaviour, but your own. If you control your reaction and expectations, you can be happy.

3.More money makes you happy: It doesn’t! Look at the people who have more money than you do. Examine their lives. Are they really happier than you? (I highly doubt it)

4.A particular person can make you happy: When I was a little girl, my dad had a favourite quote, which was on a little plaque that he had hung up in our house. It said “The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm. I believe in that completely. If you depend on others for your happiness (not matter who it may be) you are going to feel let down at some point in time.

5. What works for others works for you: Each of us are unique. A Tiesto concert may make your friend very happy, but it may give you a splitting headache. One man’s joy is another’s anathema. Just because something makes a loved one happy, it needn’t make you happy. It is okay to be different and to pursue your own interests. We are all so different from each other and we should celebrate the differences!
 ___________________________________________________________

Buy my latest book Why We Love The Way We Do: Bit.Ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDoDownload the first few chapters free!: http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

One thing you can do to make your day a magical one (Blog marathon post 2)

When my children were little children I used to read to them every single day. It was a sacred ritual we followed every night before bed time. We have a large collection of books and every night, I would walk to the 'books cupboard' and choose a book to read. Now, when I say large I mean really large. We have over 3000 books. We have two antique book cases upstairs which are more than a 100 years old, and this is where half of our books are. The other half are in my home office---the room from where I write. I have three book cases in this room and I am surrounded by books, as I work. The world of books is truly a magical one.

I discovered the magic of books as a child. My father had a big collection of books, and he also had a transferable job. So each place we went to, the books travelled with us and  were my constant companion. My dad also ensured that whichever place we moved to, we would be enrolled as a members in the local library. So I grew up with more books for company,  than people. I wanted to instill the same love for books in my children, and hence began reading to them, right from the time they were 6 months old.

When they grew up a little bit, both my children would lie on either side of me, and I would read them a story. Then we would talk about it. Whether what the person in the story did was right or wrong, what could he have done differently, what are the circumstances that make us act the way we and things like that. My children and I both loved it.

Now my son is an adult (he turned 18 last month) and my daughter is a teen.And two days back, I asked them if they wanted me to read something to them, like I used to when they were kids. Both said they would love that. So I chose a wonderful book Light from many Lamps which contains not only the best of the world’s most inspiring thoughts and ideas, but the stories behind them and how they came to be written.There are thoughts and writings from great minds like   John Burroughs, Alfred Tennyson, Robert Browning, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Abraham Lincoln, Franklin D. Roosevelt, William Cullen Bryant, Ralph Waldo Emerson, William Shakespeare, Hippocrates, Confucius, and many others.

The very first section in the book talks about happiness. What does it take to be really happy? Is there something we can do? I read to them what John Burroughs said. Then we talked about it. They liked it so much that we decided that i would read to them every day. The second day we talked about Seneca's philosophy. Today, I can't wait to read the next chapter to them, and discuss about it.

It made me think about happiness. I decided to write on it--but that will be tomorrow's post! Come back tomorrow for a post on 5 myths about happiness.

If you have children, do make it a point to read to them, no matter what their age is. Choose something that involves everyone in a discussion.
And if you do not have children, go ahead and indulge the inner child in you.
Read, ponder and lose yourself in the magical world of books.
It  is one thing you can do to make your day truly special.
__________________________________________________________


Buy my latest book Why We Love The Way We Do: Bit.Ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDoDownload the first few chapters free!: http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

A journey of a 1000 miles (with pictures!) : Blog marathon post 1

So I asked on my Facebook Author page, what you all thought about my starting a blog marathon. And the response was overwhelming :)


You guys are such wonderful and enthusiastic readers. Hence starting today, there will be a new post every single day for the next 30 days. Those who have followed my previous blog marathons know that I never miss a post. I have done so many now that I have lost count. I had started this in 2009 and have done one (sometimes two) every year since then. It is a huge challenge to post every day, and takes discipline and commitment, like many of you know. Exactly the ingredients needed to write a book. Or form a habit that you want as a part of your life. (Like starting an exercise routine or decideing to go for a walk every single day. If any of you have been wanting to do that but were just kept postponing it, join me in my blog marathon. I will blog every day, and you can walk/run/do whatever it is that you want to do. Deal? You can leave me a comment on my post every single day if you like, if that would motivate you.)

The reason there was a long silence from my end was that I have been traveling like crazy for my book launches. We started off in Bangalore. It was a grand launch. Two of my readers launched my book! It was an emotional moment.(and a very proud one too!)




  Then I was off to Maldives for a family vacation. It was magical. Truly heaven. Here's one of my favorite  pictures from the vacation:





Then I was off to Delhi for the Times Lit fest.
Times of India, (National edition) carried this photo of me:

After that I had a FABULOUS event with the Guragon Moms club.


If you want to know what the event was all about and what i spoke, you can read about it in this link:
http://gurgaonmoms.com/2015/12/06/preeti-shenoys-why-we-love-the-way-we-do-gurgaomoms-book-club-event/

I also got a chance to catch up with my good friend Suma, (and another friend) at Gurgaon. We had a FABULOUS time. She also attended my event the next day. Here 's my favourite pic from the event
Then I was off to Bhubhaneshwar. It was the first time that I was visiting the city and I fell in love with it's beauty, history, culture and splendour. I gave a talk at XIMB. That was superbly received too.
Here is a pic in front of the main campus building at XIMB


At the ximb campus, giving my talk.
With the students at ximb
In the evening I had an event at Crossword in Bhubhaneshwar.


Crossword Bhubaneshwar

Then I was back to bangalore, where I was a part of the Bangalore Lit fest. My session was with Durjoy Datta and Ravinder Singh and it was modertaed my Nandita Bose. That went off splendidly as well.
Here are my favourite pictures from the event:

Our session 'New age romantics' at BLF

With Shinie Antony
With Durjoy Datta
With Ravinder Singh and Durjoy Datta
And if you aren't tired of listening to all my travels, there is more!!

After the Bangalore lit fest, I left for Vadodara! :)
It was the first time for me in Vadodara as well (though i have been to Ahemdabad many times, I had not been to any other place in Gujarat)
I gave a talk at an International school and had a fabulous time with the-students. they loved my talk and asked me lots of questions.
Here is a picture of me giving the talk.

 And this one with the students, I love! They asked me very intelligent questions. Smart kids!


After that i visited Maneesh Book store Vadodara, which a very popular book store. The owners Pinakini and Maneesh were the perfect hosts. They gifted me two lovely books--one a coffee table book on Vadodara (or Baroda as it used to be known) and another wonderful book filled with writings from great thinkers.

 Here is me signing away the books at Maneesh Book Store.

 Then they treated me to a sumptuous, delicious Gujarati Thali.

I barely had time to rest and the bookstore event was upon me. Here I am at Crossword Alkapuri at Vadodara. It was great to see my book in the top ten highest selling titles.
 The turnout was amazing. You can see the packed house.
 And the people queuing up to take my signature on the books.


Every place I went to, I also had press conferences and media interactions and television and radio interviews. I haven't shared what the newspapers said here in this post. But if you want to see it, you can

 click HERE.
 
So after a grueling, hectic schedule, I am finally back in Bangalore--and blogging! (You didn't think for a moment that I would forget my blog and being in touch with you, did you? If you did--well, here I am :) And will be showing up daily for the next 30 days)

Leave me comments! Share your thoughts. I don't want this to be one-sided.

See you tomorrow!
__________________________________________________________

Buy my latest book Why We Love The Way We Do: Bit.Ly?WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDoDownload the first few chapters free!: http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

Signing of 'Why We Love The Way We Do' and party time!

Whenever a new book comes out, the stress of it makes me fall ill. There is just SO MUCH that goes into a book, which a reader usually knows nothing about. I have written in the past on what it takes to write a book.

I have also written about how I signed 3000 books for 'The One You Cannot Have' and for  the Secret Wishlist  before that.
 I had done this last year too when 'It happens for a reason' came out.

This year was no different. Here are the pictures of signing the books:



Like the last few times, i signed for  about 10 hours non-stop.


And it continued on the second day.

The joy  expressed by my readers at getting signed copies is unimaginable.  There are posts popping up all over my social media feed, thanking me for signing.

Thanks Preeti shenoy... Got sigend copy..
Posted by Pranay Joshi on Thursday, 19 November 2015

Dear Ms. Preeti Shenoy(Favourite author), Just now got the exclusive signed copy of your recent book 'WHY WE LOVE THE WAY WE DO'... Can't wait to wind up back from work & start reading the book.:):)Regards,
Posted by Pratibha Vasudev on Wednesday, 18 November 2015

Have recieved your signed copy of "why we love the way we do"..it really made my day and as soon i came back to...
Posted by Srashti Dubey on Wednesday, 18 November 2015

Hello mam...finally my first wish is fulfilled as i get a signed copy as an acknowledgment for a loyal reader like me...
Posted by Jahnavi Gunturu on Monday, 16 November 2015

And the above posts are just a tiny fraction of the ones on facebook! Apart from this, posts all over Instagram and Twitter as well! (If you are on Insta, my id is Preeti.Shenoy and if you are on Twitter my handle is @preetishenoy) The book is already on the best-seller charts. To celebrate it's success we are having a really nice (and exclusive) party on 21st November in Bangalore. It is an invite only event.If you wish to attend, you could request an invite by sending a mail to whywelovethewaywedo@preetishenoy.com We will be closing the guest list soon! That's all for now. Will be back again soon. (No matter how busy I am, I always come back! If you are a regular reader, you know that by now)

 With love Preeti http://preetishenoy.com/

Session at Kindle Litfest X and a free booklet !

Thought I would share with you, the video recording of Litfest X, which was a virtual litfest, organised by Amazon's Kindle. I am in conversation with Kumaar Bagrodia, who is the festival director.
I had a great time, interacting with everyone who logged in that day. (People could login and interact with me, real time). It was fun and I enjoyed myself.  The first three chapters of my new book Why We Love The Way We Do, was released during this session.

If you want to download  the free booklet, (there's a signed photo of me in there as well), here is the link:

http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo#stha... http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo


I am really excited about this book, mostly because I have spent hours and hours, talking to people, researching stuff about relationships, pondering about them asking questions, and discovering and learning many things. I have quoted real-life examples, studies, what the experts say. The short essays give us answers to many pertinent  questions like 'Is it possible to tell if it is love or lust', 'Why do break-ups hurt so much?' and 'Whether friends with benefits' is a good option in relationships.

The book is divided into seven sections, and each section has a specific topic.

My publishers have an arrangement with Amazon, and I will be signing ALL the copies that are pre-ordered. Those who have been following my blog, would remember what back-breaking work that is going to be.

But I am looking forward to it!

Incidentally, the book is already on the best-sellers on amazon.in. I have to thank you guys for making that happen.
And in case  you are one of those late-kates (Or late-latif if you want to be Indian) and still do not know the pre-order link, here it is:  bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo





http://preetishenoy.com/

BNLF--a memorable event!

So, I had told you in the last post about BNLF--an international blogging conference, where I was a keynote speaker along with Bruce Dickinson.
I have just got back home---and am revelling in the hangover of a BRILLIANT event. i enjoyed every moment spent there, and my talk was superbly received too.
You can see some of the reactions from my Twitter screenshots that I  am sharing here. (There were many many such! But you get the idea. I am not sharing all of them.)





Then there was my meeting with Bruce Dickinson. We had a nice conversation, in the green room just before he went on stage, as he was speaking after me.
Here is a pic!

And here are two pictures of me speaking. Pic courtesy: Indiblogger 




With the fabulous Indiblogger team.

The journey for me, from an unknown blogger to a best-selling author has been a dream come true. Conferences like these give me an opportunity to connect with like-minded souls.

I met so many new people, made so many friends and came back, richer, happier, more content.

When we connect with the ones we can relate to, the joy we feel is indescribable.
A meeting of hearts, a meeting of minds and above all  a euphoria that lingers, laced with treasured memories that you carry for a life time.

Will blog again soon.
Till then stay positive and look at the bright side.
_________________________________________________
GRAB my new book. ALL pre-orders will be signed by me bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

http://preetishenoy.com/

BNLF--a blogging conference like no other!

Sometimes in life, you have  journeys that you start on, where you never know where they take you. You start on them hesitatingly, unsure of the destination. You keep going as long as you can see the road in front of you, lit with a little torchlight sometimes and sometimes by the sun. There are times when you doubt what you are doing. There are times when you stumble and wonder if you are lost. But you don't turn back and abandon the road half way through. You keep going. No matter how hard it is. No matter how exhausted you are. Because you are hooked. It's the one thing that keeps you going.

My blogging has been one such journey. I started this blog on 22nd October 2006. It has been nine long years now and I am snow no longer the anonymous, unknown blogger that I was when I first began. The journey for me has be beautiful, exhilarating, terrifying, exciting and the magnificent--all at the same time.

And I am going to be talking about this journey at a totally fabulous International blogging conference BNLF 2015 ! (Click on link and scroll down the page for details) . Bruce Dickinson of Iron Maiden would be a keynote speaker too.

I am really excited about this, as I was one of those who had attended  one of the first meets that Indiblogger had  organised way back in 2008 and what is more had even blogged about it! If you want to travel back in time to read that post, click here.

You can check out my speaker profile here: https://www.bnlf.com/preeti-shenoy
And also read a curatin raiser here.

I shall definitely share with you, pictures from the event.


And yes, thank you for traveling with me on my journey!  You, dear reader, have been a great companion.
And like the movie line goes 'Everybody needs a co-pilot.'
Some, you get to meet at conferences like BNLF  :)

  _________________________________________________________
Buy my books: http://is.gd/preetibooks

http://preetishenoy.com/

Why We Love The Way We Do--First three chapters

Here is something I am very excited about! The first three chapters of my new book Why We Love The Way We Do, will be launched LIVE, today (24th October 2015) at 12.00 pm IST.
You can interact with me in real time, at my litest session. It will be LIVE on youtube.

To login, go to this link: http://www.litfestx.com/closer-from-d...

That's it!
For those of you who are reading this post later, you can still watch the session.
And after it is launched, I will come back here later today and update the post with the link to the first three chapters.

See you soon!

Update: The session was fun! Watch it on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y739L...
And as promised, here is the link to the first three chapters:  http://is.gd/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo

PRE-ORDER THE BOOK:  bit.ly/WhyWeLoveTheWayWeDo
______________________________________
Buy my books: http://is.gd/preetibooks

http://preetishenoy.com/