Renee Miller's Blog, page 39

And the Award Goes To....

Suzy Turner honored me with an award for the Edge. Yes folks, another victim…er, lovely person who has drifted to the dark side. I know every time I venture over here and Clive looks at me that way…I want to stay forever. But I'm wandering here; to accept the award, I have to answer 10 questions, which I've done below. After my answers, I've nominated 15 more blogs for an award. Now, Suzy's award was lovely, but I've created one that could only have come from the Edge. What shall I call it? The kickass, awesome, most impressive, shiny, blog award. I know, you can't even tell I made it myself. I'm so crafty.

So, I always change the blog award rules at least a little because I know that some of you fellow bloggers won't accept because you don't have the time to search through your blog list and post the links, etc. I'll make it easy for you: If you CHOOSE to nominate other blogs, that's great. If not, good for you. Don't. BUT please answer the questions and leave me the link here in the comments. I'm DYING to know the answers. Please. **bats eyes while blushing prettily**

PS: Anyone who does post that they've won that ugly-ass award definitely deserves it.



1. If you blog anonymously are you happy doing it that way; if you are not anonymous do you wish you had started out anonymously so you could be anonymous now?



I don't blog anonymously. I would NEVER do anything anonymously, well there was that one time…but never mind about that. I would never want to be anonymous. In case you hadn't noticed, I love attention.



2. Describe one incident that shows your inner stubborn side:



**sighs** Just one incident? I could give you a list, because you see, my stubborn side isn't 'inner', it's very 'outer'. I've even named it "my Irish". I tend to dig in my heels on a lot of things. Otherwise, I would not be here writing. My stubborn side responds very aggressively to 'you can't'. It says, 'I what?! The hell!"



3. What do you see when you really look at yourself in the mirror?



I see a woman who likes who she is, but has some things she'd change slightly. I think everyone has those qualities or traits they'd like to improve. I see someone my daughters can be proud of. And, I see those grey roots daring to emerge yet again…



4. What is your favourite summer cold drink?



Beer. Is beer just for summer?



5. When you take time for yourself, what do you do?



Read, write, sleep; not necessarily in that order.



6. Is there something you still want to accomplish in your life? What is it?



Of course I want to publish my writing. I also want to be able to sit back and say, "Ah, no regrets." Hey, Does Clive count as an 'accomplishment', because I'd sure like to accomplish that before I die. Just saying...



7. When you attended school, were you the class clown, the class overachiever, the shy person, or always ditching?



I played a few roles in school. Until grade four I was the shy chubby girl whose thighs were so fat she couldn't run with the other kids without falling. Grade four through 8 my stubborn streak emerged along with a slightly OCD overachiever who could not accept anything less than the best marks. High school, well I was the clown and the overachiever who ditched class to watch Y&R with her grandmother. Victor Newman you sly dog, you. I always liked him, even evil Victor was hot. The best part, my grandma would call the school to excuse me from class so I didn't get grounded. Shhh…don't tell my mom.



8. If you close your eyes and want to visualize a very poignant moment of your life what would you see?



Okay, you're all going to be shocked at this answer. So mushy and sentimental. I have two moments that will forever stay in my brain as the most poignant, meaningful and important moments of my life. The first time I held each of my daughters.



9. Is it easy for you to share your true self in your blog or are you more comfortable writing posts about other people or events?



Not at all, this is me. Probably a little less me than I share here at home, but I'm told profanity, old man pyjamas and bad hair days don't fly on the blogosphere.



10. If you had the choice to sit down and read or talk on the phone, which would you do and why?



Oooh, hard choice. I do love my phone. But, because I have to steal time to read, I'd have to go with reading. Actually, don't tell my friends (especially not my mother) but I read while I'm on the phone. I'm so good at it now, they never notice. But that's a secret.







And my picks for award winning blogs are:



Follow Me I'm Canadian



Hyperbole and a Half



Kierston Writes

Liz Fichera





Pages For Small Wages

Rita's World

Thinking Out Loud

2 Girls On a Bench

Carlos's Odd World

Goddess of The Corn

Kate Quinn

Musings From the Slush Pile 



Wandering Weeds

Invincible Summer

Baffled Spirit (Michael Keyton)

I Should Be Editing....

While writing, I can leave the internet on, the television, work in the center of the chaos that is my living room and not be distracted once. Not once. Well, if there's blood, I'll look away from the writing to make sure it's not life threatening, but only blood will pull my attention from my work.



Editing is a different animal. While I'm editing, pretty much anything can persuade me to stop and check it out. Oh, look there's something on the carpet. I should check that out. Pretty leaf on the sidewalk. We should go for a walk while I'm up. I have mail! Oh, just five minutes to check my email and then I'll go back to rewriting. Well, maybe after I've checked out Goodreads...and Twitter...and...yes, this is how my mind works while editing.



This is a huge problem, folks. You know why? Because I'm about three books ahead of myself. Three fully polished and ready for that crackerjack agent who is able to see my brilliance and three more waiting for...me. They're calling "Renee, please clean us up. We're so dirty and stinky. Please, make us shiny and sparkly and impossible to resist. Please...stop looking at the damn email!" This is a relentless chant in my mind. I know I need to finish them, but I'd much rather start that new project. After all, there's a file full of those completely outlined and ready to write. What about those stories? They need to be born. The others are just smelly, they can wait. You can't stop birth, right? I must. I have to. Or else...what? Actually, I'm afraid I'll never get to them if I don't do it now.



Today I'm rewriting Albertsville, a manuscript I finished a couple of months ago. It's about 8000 words too short. I forgot scenes. What? It happens. I got all excited and forgot to look at my outline. So first, I must add these scenes, which are very important to tying the loose threads up, and then I must go through and pick it apart. Get rid of echoes, crappy dialogue, and all of that really boring stuff. Sigh. Oh and let's not forget Jack is waiting, and Rowan. They aren't pleased either. Jack has sat gathering dust for a year, Rowan about six months and both are great stories. In fact, aside from Wade Bowen in Dirty Truths, Jack is my favorite character so far. I love him. I just needed time to separate myself. My problem I guess is that I get new ideas and tend to become obsessed with new projects.



Oh and let's not forget paying the bills, kids, life, and all that. Those things jump in just to piss me off and mess up my mental schedule. I feel like a hamster on a wheel, running and running but getting absolutely nowhere. Ugh.



I'm such a whiner. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does this. Does anyone work on just one project from start to finish? How do you do it? Are you medicated?



Oh, and some good news, We are Canadian has honored me as their member of the week. Thanks Tanya. I'm really flattered that you'd want my mug up on your home page for a whole seven days.



Really, I'm going back to Albertsville. Things are getting hot there, despite the snow. There's a lonely moose, a murderous town official and a randy city boy in love with a country girl who just betrayed him...let's not forget the mill foreman in love with Calvin, his shift foreman.

What I've been thinking about...the PG version.

A new post? Oh my shit, Renee, you just posted yesterday. Another one already? Yes, I'm currently unable to do major housework, too sore and tired to do much more than walk across the room and sit so I figured, why not entertain the masses with my always fascinating rambling blog posts?



So what's on my mind today? Lots of stuff. Pull up a seat. No, not that one. It's um...stained. Yeah, you don't want to get any on you. Thanks. No, that chair is fine. Relax. Have some Doritos.



Everyone is gearing up for NaNo and it seems that's all I read anymore. NaNo this, NaNo that, and OMG! I'm so excited for NaNo. I admire the devotion folks, really I do and I'm not in a position to criticize because I get really excited and talk about things obsessively too. I've also never attempted NaNo and to be honest, the idea of 50K words in a month, although I have done it, scares the shit out of me. It's not the writing, I write every day, it's the commitment to write so many words no matter what and I'd hate to commit to such a thing and fail. Gasp! Failure makes me nauseous. So I've never done it. But can I ask you all please, PLEASE, PLLLEEEAASSSEEE, don't consider your NaNo novel ready for publication. Please don't bombard agents and publishers with it on December 1st because honestly, and I'm saying this as a friend, it is NOT ready for publication on December 1st. You have a rough draft. Polish it, then send it. Hell, any friends of mine who are participating, I'll beta read for you if you promise not to submit the day you're done.



Why do I ask this? Because you're clogging up the lines people. Agents and publishers get bombarded after NaNo is over with manuscripts that aren't even close to ready for publication. This means that they have ten times (or more) their regular emails to get through and by the time they get to those of us who have polished our manuscripts their eyes are crossed and they're cranky and really, I need all the help I can get. Cranky agents aren't what I need. Okay, that said, good luck. I hope you kick NaNo's ass and write 100K words.



Next on my mind: Querying. I am currently querying three projects. Paranormal, mainstream and a little romantic thriller that I'm really excited about. I mean, I squeal every time I think about the finished product. That excited. Why am I querying 3? I finished one and began the process, and I've been rejected several times. Yes, I've counted, and no, I'd rather not share the exact number. While I queried, I finished another manuscript. It's damn good. I promise. So, I began querying that one too. I've received a few rejections. 6 to be exact. I don't know what the other agents are doing, but so far they haven't rejected it. Fingers crossed. While querying that one, I finished a third novel. THE novel. My BEST writing I think. I started querying it today. So far so good. Of course, it usually takes about 24 hours for the rejections to roll in and it is Saturday, so it's unlikely they'll begin until Monday.



Now, I have three more that need polishing. Beta readers? Oh yes, I need them. I have a dark humor mainstream novel, a historical (sort of) thriller, and a commercial fiction novel that I'm not really sure yet where it falls in terms of genre. One is set in a fictional US town, the next in 18th-19th Century New Orleans and the last in Northern Canada. I get around. Yes, I do.



So the super exciting manuscript I just finished? Want a taste? I like to share, you know that. So, um...let's see. Oh, here's a good section: (there will be profanity)



Wade sighed at the crash, but smiled as he pictured Kristina tripping over her feet again. He stood and walked out of the office into the bar. As he emerged, his gaze found the reason for the noise. In a rage, he strode toward the table near the bar.







"You stupid bitch," Sam Thompson yelled.





Kristina sat in a heap on the floor, her shirt soaked and her eyes wide. She flinched as Sam raised his fist.





"What the hell is going on here?" Wade kept his voice low and even.





"She spilled that tray—"





"Why?"





Sam paused, his face reddened and he opened his mouth but nothing came out.





Wade turned to Kristina. "What happened?"





"He g-grabbed me and I told him I'd come back, then he put his hand in my pants and I forgot about the tray. I didn't mean to spill it." Kristina's voice trembled forcing a lump to Wade's throat.





Wade held out his hand.





She took it and stood.





He squeezed it reassuringly, relieved to see color flood her cheeks again. "Go get a clean shirt. It's okay, you did nothing wrong. Come on Sam, you and I need to have words."





He grabbed Sam by the collar; the fool proved wise enough not to struggle. Wade half-dragged him out the door and around the building to the dumpsters. When they were out of site, he threw him against the brick wall of the building. Wade's shirt clung to his back. The night was still humid and the small effort it took to drag Sam outside had him sweating. "Who do you think you are coming into my bar and treating my staff like that?"





"I didn't know—"





Wade swung, his fist connecting with Sam's nose.





A sickening crack and Sam fell to his knees. "Fuck, Wade."





Wade allowed him to regain his footing. Blood covered Sam's chin and the front of his white polo shirt. "You think you can just treat women like garbage?"





"Fuck you. You're nothing without your biker friends. I'm not scared of you." Sam spat, bringing his arms up.





Wade stepped forward. "Really? Let's see about that."





#





Kristina stood at the sink behind the bar rinsing the towels she used to clean up her mess. The door opened and she looked up. Wade strolled in alone. Was that blood on his hands? He walked to the bathroom, emerging a few minutes later, his hands clean and his shirt tucked in once more.





Coming around the bar, he paused behind her. Kristina shivered as the warmth of his breath reached the back of her neck. "Don't worry, he won't be back. No one touches you in here. You better tell me next time you have a problem. Before it comes to that."





Kristina dropped the damp towel and turned to face him. She paused startled at the force of his gaze, his eyes so dark they appeared almost black. "I can't do this Wade. I'm sorry, but I'm going to see if I can get my job back at Mac's."





"What? No. You're not."





"I am. I can't do this and I keep screwing things up. I'm just not cut out for this place."





"The customers love you, although a bit too much sometimes. You take home more in tips than anyone I've seen yet." Wade reached out and brushed her bangs from her eyes, his gaze softened and he smiled. "You're our comic relief. What am I going to do without you here? I can't spill the drinks myself."





"Funny." Kristina looked at her hands, noticing for the first time that she still wore her wedding rings. She covered her left hand with her right. "Seriously, Wade, why would you keep someone who is terrible at this job?"





He sighed, glancing at her hands. He frowned and shook his head, then looked at her with a crooked grin. "You aren't terrible. Your drink to table to floor ratio is improving. Don't let one bad incident make you give up. That's not the girl I remember."





Kristina stared at him, trying not to laugh. He was right. She had improved. A bit. But the fear that man forced to the surface made her remember Daniel and all she wanted to run away from. She hated that she could go back to a spineless coward so easily.





"I guess if I quit then guys like him win."





Wade put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed. "Exactly, and I will never let that happen again. So? You'll stick it out? I'd hate to have to drag you in here kicking and screaming every night. It's bad for business."





"I guess so, as long as you can afford the damage."





"For you, I'd pay any amount." Wade grinned and walked toward the office.







That's all folks. What do you think? Oh, you're still seething about the NaNo rant aren't you? So my ploy to distract you from it didn't work. Well, I didn't think it would. Please, I love comments.

What I Know For Sure...

Who watches Oprah? I used to, when I had time for television, but not so much anymore. I do remember she did this thing where she'd list "What I know for sure..." and usually it was inspirational and all that and don't expect to get that here. If you want inspiration, go buy those Chicken Soup books. Today's blog post is related to writing, of course, and here's how it will work. I'm going to list things that are 'debated' in the writing/publishing industry and then post 'What I know for sure' based on my own experience. I'd love it if you would comment on your own learning experiences and let us know what you know for sure as well. Here we go:



Traditional publishing is better than self publishing.



Ouch. Don't you hate when people say or imply that they're better simply because they've got a publisher, agent or whatever? Me too. Irritating. But I know from my experience that traditional publishing is better FOR ME. What I know for sure is that you need to educate yourself, learn all you need to know about both options and decide with that knowledge which route you want to go. Neither is 'better', it depends on what your personal goals are for your career.



To network or not to network.



My writing should sell my books not my personality. You have to get out there, get known. I don't like people and I don't intend to pretend I do. Why can't I just write the book and be done with it? **Sigh**



Here's what I know for sure: Twitter, Facebook, etc. won't actually sell your books. That's up to you. BUT, networking puts you out there, makes you known and makes your work visible. Without that you're going to have a tough time selling that first, even that second book. You don't have to be exciting, you don't have to be likable, and you don't have to tweet about how you remembered to wipe  your ass today. Readers don't care. You DO have to make the attempt to at least be familiar. I have about 250 followers on Twitter. When I publish a book, 100 to 150 of those people will not give a shit and will not bother buying.  100 of them might say, "Hmm. Interesting." Of that 100, 50 might go out and buy my first book. More realistically, 25 or 15 of them will. Not much when you consider I have 250 followers. However, if not for Twitter, I wouldn't even have that small number buying. Then 5 of that 15 might review the book favorably. They might have 1000 followers and 10 of those might buy because of that review. A couple of them might review as well and another 5 of their followers might buy, and so on and so on...you get what I'm saying?



What does professional mean?



I've blogged about this already. I am what I am. What I know for sure is that I cannot convincingly pretend I'm anything else. If you don't like me, well I'm not going to kiss your ass and try to change your mind. If you don't want to read my writing because I have a voice and I use it, then you most likely aren't my target audience anyway. Professionalism is about respect, in my opinion. If you're respectful to others, and you are honest and real, then  you are being professional. It doesn't mean stuffy, fake, and nice to everyone. Professional means being you.



I want to write, but I just can't find the time.



What I know for sure is that if you can't find the time to write, you don't really want to write.



Reviews. Don't comment on them.



I'm on the fence about this one. I know for sure that to comment on a negative review where you attack the reviewer isn't the wisest career choice. If you comment on an unfair negative review that is insulting you or your readers....I can see me doing that. Is it right? Not likely. I think that this particular issue is a 'case by case' problem. What I know for sure is that you should NEVER comment as someone else. If you're the writer, be honest. If you don't have enough balls to comment as yourself don't bother commenting.



Agents and publishers just don't want new writers.



What I know for sure is that this comment is a load of crap. Of course they want new writers. If you're giving up simply because you've gotten a rejection or 500, then you shouldn't be writing. This business takes persistence and a backbone of solid steel, and if you allow yourself to get discouraged, you'll never make it. I have bad days. I cry, bang my head on hard surfaces and pitch tantrums where I concoct brilliant schemes that eliminate all agents and publishers in one giant blow but at the end of the day, I still send another query and cross my fingers for luck. It only takes one.



Renee is obvioulsy heavily medicated and shouldn't be blogging this week.



What I know for sure is that yes, I am medicated. No, I probably shouldn't be blogging and probably make no sense at all. But it beats lying on the couch moaning in pain. No one here listens anyway.



So, what do you know for sure?

Plotting, Scheming and More Fun

It's been a busy couple of weeks on The Edge. Busy is good, but soon I'd like to see busy turn into money. You hear me money gods? I need some of what you got.



Okay, so because I often have hours of time on my hands, I've taken on a page as the Canada Books Examiner. Yep, got too much time to get into trouble. This should make sure I have no spare minutes with which to scheme. Author spotlights, fiction writing and book reviews will now be placed on the Canada page and all the other stuff; writing conferences, local book-related events, etc. you'll find on the Toronto page.



In other news, I've concocted a scheme to bring everyone over to the dark side. In OFW's November challenge, I've challenged members to produce an outline for a new writing project and further tempted them by mentioning we'll be using said outline in further challenges. Oh, crafty me. We'll get those Pantsers to see the light yet. I'm very curious to see, after they've completed outlining, writing and rewriting these projects, how many continue to write on the fly.



You see, I too was once a pantser and swore I could NOT write from an outline. I mean, how boring is that? To know what will happen, to plan every little detail? Ugh. No thanks. But then I tackled a project I've called I Do and Other Lies We Tell and I had no other choice. To begin with three threads, three separate stories and then tie them all together midway through, was confusing and frustrating and I just couldn't do it the way I'd done other projects. So, an outline had to be written. As I compiled character notes, chapter outlines, etc. I came up with new ideas, new characters and more. At that point I realized I'd never write another novel without an outline.



So, I'll let you know if my scheming pays off. I've made it almost impossible to resist. They don't call us Plotters for nothing you know.

Agents versus Writers?

On Twitter over the past few weeks, I've noticed a trend that the little sidebar isn't listing. Agents and writers getting…combative? Argumentative? Scrappy?



What? Yeah, I read a couple of blogs, noted the animosity, but didn't really think it was a big deal. But apparently it is. I've noticed quite a few shots taken at Janet Reid lately, both on her Query Shark blog and on Twitter...and author blogs. Now, first, let's think about this logically all you angry writers. Janet Reid has never pretended to be anything but the Shark. She's snarky, blunt, sometimes nasty, sarcastic…and extremely fucking helpful to writers who have no clue what a query is. You're surprised that her tweets are like her blog? You're surprised she'd drop the f-bomb in a query critique? Are you mental? The f-bomb she dropped was intended as part of an encouraging statement. She was telling the writer to get a backbone and NOT be humble. Come on. She is what she is and I for one appreciate that. Personally, I'm far more suspicious of the syrupy sweet agents that randomly drop comments full of innuendo but no clear insult in between nauseating 'I love writers' posts. Give me an agent who will say "This sucks. Fix it." Any day. Critics are a writer's best friend. They keep us striving to do better, fighting to get those words just right, and they don't give us the false sense of 'oh, I am a great writer' that does nothing for us. An agent who is not an unabashed critic is useless.



On to the next issue. Other agents, who shall remain nameless, (Sorry, but Reid has big shoulders and a backbone made of steel or whatever Superman is made of. She can handle the mention) have been making comments here, there, and everywhere that could be considered as less than professional. Writers don't like this. Writers comment on this. Writers rant about this. I just can't seem to work up a righteous indignation about it. Why? Because, seeing the infallible, oh so mystical, holier than all that is holy, agent fuck up makes them less intimidating. When I'm not intimidated, I tend not to fumble my words or do something stupid. That's good. So, they're human. Goodness, did you think they were gods? No? Oh, yes, they're the Gatekeepers. Please. Let's get a grip.



I'm the first one to pen a lengthy rant and vomit my fury all over the place when I'm pissed off. I've done this a lot. (I know, I'm subtle.) Recently I was really frustrated when a form rejection arrived not ten minutes after I'd queried. I let you all know about it too. Said agent is all over Twitter, tweeting about how busy they are and how they can't believe the ridiculous queries they get, blah, blah, oh and how they ate a burnt piece of bacon last night at 5pm, anyone else love burnt bacon? See, my initial anger was that I felt this was unprofessional, rude and well, annoying. But after posting and reading replies, the cool voice of reason (thanks Maria) forced me to admit that said agent is human. How they tweet or reject has no direct bearing on how they do their job. They are a kickass agent. If they weren't, they wouldn't have the client list they have. So, I scrubbed their name of "The Naughty List" and I'll send something else to them later.



Should agents begin commenting on my blog and on Twitter about the unprofessionalism of my posts? Goodness, I hope not. Or I'm screwed. In fact, most of us are screwed. Show me an unprofessional agent post and I'll show you ten unprofessional writer posts.



The bottom line is that writers and agents work together. TOGETHER. The agent is not my boss. The agent doesn't pay me. I am not the agent's boss. The agent helps me. I give them something to sell that would earn both of us money, and if they like it, they say, "Yeah, I'll try to find this a home." Give and take. Our livelihoods depend on each other. We're all human. We all have faults and goddammit Twitter is evil. It takes a saint to resist the urge to tweet about the broccoli stuck in your teeth. There shouldn't be any animosity here. The fight is stuipid.



And believe me, when my Irish says it's a stupid fight, it must be because my Irish loves a good quarrel.



Rant finished. I'm starving. Where did I put those Doritos?

I am Writer, Hear me...tap the keyboard really hard.

It's no secret that I am less than enthusiastic about self publishing, although let me say, before the self published folks get bent out of shape and begin sending nasty comments and emails to The Edge, I do not think that all self published books are crap. There are authors who I'm friends with and others I've simply read who have published very good books that were edited, well written and who bust their asses in order to sell said books.





Sadly, those authors are not easy to find. Few and...

That's Bitch With a Capital B, as in Big Mouth. Thanks.

As I write this post I am absolutely vibrating. No, I didn't change my batteries, I'm pissed. I recently came across a link on Twitter that caught my attention. Then that link led me to this article. So what's all the hoopla about? It started when someone stood up for a book called Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson. This guy is trying to get Speak and other books banned from schools. He's already succeeded in having Slaughterhouse 5 removed from at least one school shelf and a book called Twenty...

The Edge is One Lovely Blog

Paige at Writing, Reviews, and a Little Bit of Me  has awarded me my second ever blog award and I must say, it is a lovely one indeed, thank you, Paige and I enjoyed the very cool blogs Paige chose too.





Now, I have to pay it forward. So, I've selected some blogs I follow who I feel are worthy of such an award. I mean, who doesn't want a lacy, frilly, teacup full of...I'm going to say they're candy roses.



If you're one of these blogs, follow the instructions below and pay it forward.



R...

Rejection With a Smile

Ah, rejection. You know, I don't recall experiencing rejection very often in my life. Not until I started writing for publication. Who'd have thought it would become a daily thing? I sure didn't. In fact, it's so common, I barely flinch anymore. What? No, you don't want it? Okay, on to the next one.



Is it possible to get a positive rejection? Is that an oxymoron? A few months ago, I'd have said that there is nothing positive or good about a rejection. It's heartbreaking, soul shattering and...