Thom S. Rainer's Blog, page 329

Pray for Cornerstone Baptist Church

Location: Lawrence, Kansas

Pastor: Gary O’Flannagan

Worship Time: 10:45 AM Central Time

Fast Facts: Cornerstone is 23 years old and was born from two churches that united in 1989. It is a church of of several generations and ethnic groups. This church loves Lawrence and wants to see God’s Kingdom grow and be part of that growth.

In 2011 Cornerstone purchased 8.25 acres in the east part of Lawrence where there are very few churches; the neighborhood where they are hope to build in 2014 has none in fact. Please pray that their current facility will sell at a fair price for both parties, that they will be able to start building in early 2014, that they will have favor with the neighbors, the city, the developer, volunteers and that God prepares them for the new neighborhood and the people there. Also pray they stay united and at peace during this entire process.

Website: www.cornerstonelawrence.com

“Pray for . . .” is the Sunday blog series at ThomRainer.com. We encourage you to pray for these churches noted every Sunday. Please feel free to comment that you are praying as well.

If you would like to have your church featured in the “Pray for…” series, download this information form and return it to the address on the form.

Please Pray for Me

This article did not come easy. Even as I write it, I wonder if my motivations are pure.

I will soon ask you to pray for me as I share the gospel with someone. But I fear that my motive may come across as boastful, as if I am trying to show you how spiritual I am by this act. I’ve known a few “notch-belt” Christians; I hope I am not one.

Frankly, I know myself too well to even hint that I have attained a good measure of spiritual growth. At age 58, I still have a long way to go.

So, please allow me to share the story that led to this pending encounter.

Thirty Years Ago

The year was 1983. I had left the world of banking and business to go to seminary. I took a secular job to support my family. That is where I met “Jim” (not his real name).

I felt an immediate friendship with Jim. He was straightforward, unpretentious and, beneath a gruff exterior, very kind. He was twelve years older than I; and he took me under his wing in the workplace.

Jim, by his own admission, was not a Christian. He had many questions for me. I did my best to answer them. He allowed me to share the gospel with him freely.

But when I left that job in 1986, Jim still was not a Christian. And I am ashamed to admit that I lost track of him.

Then the phone rang 27 years later.

Back to the Future

Jim discovered that we both lived in Nashville, so he contacted me just a few days ago. His words were as straightforward as always. He wanted to pick up on the gospel conversations we had not finished over a quarter of a century earlier.

We had dinner together. It was if we had seen each other yesterday rather than 27 years ago. And Jim still had a lot of questions about the Bible, Jesus, and his own salvation. We both agreed to continue our conversations in the days and weeks ahead.

Then, on Wednesday of this week, I got another phone call.

It was Jim.

The Diagnosis

He told me calmly but with deep concern that he had just received tough news. He had been diagnosed with a disease that would take his life in two to three years without treatment. He might make it ten years with aggressive treatment. At age 70, Jim was leaning toward no treatment.

His next words were not unexpected. If I had time, he wanted to meet with me soon.

I can’t believe he even asked if I had time.

Who Is Jim?

Jim is wealthy. He is very intelligent. He is married with no children. He is my friend.

I really love Jim as a friend. God has given me a big heart of love for him.

And he has honest questions. He does not try to win a debate. He just wants answers. And he told me in our last conversation that his major challenge is having sufficient belief. He says he wants to believe; but he has not been able to believe.

The Meeting Tomorrow

We will get together at my home at 1:00 pm tomorrow (Sunday, November 3, 1:00 pm CST). Jim will have a lot of questions.

My heart is breaking for my friend. As I write this article, tears are falling from my eyes. I so much want him to know Jesus, His love, and His peace. My burden is heavy.

I realize that I cannot save Jim; only Christ can. And I realize that this type of article is not what I am supposed to write on the blog. I am supposed to give to you the readers. But in this article, I am asking.

I am asking for your prayers. For me. Far more though, for Jim.

Believe me, I know the power of prayer. And I know how many great prayer warriors there are who visit this blog.

Forgive me for my self-centeredness in this blog, but would you pray for me? Would you pray for Jim?

Please, would you pray for Jim?

Thank you.

The Pastor’s Salary – Rainer on Leadership #029

Podcast Episode #029

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Regardless of your profession, when people openly discuss how much or how little you should be paid, it can be uncomfortable. For pastors, this can be magnified. So this week’s podcast episode deals with how to manage issues related to pastoral and ministerial salaries—and the five things you should know about those salaries. Among the topics Jonathan and I discuss are:

Annual raises
Special income tax regulations
Housing allowances
Total package compensation
Take home pay

Pastor, if you truly are underpaid—speak up.

Church, if you are underpaying your pastor—step up.

Episode Sponsor

This week’s podcast is brought to you by Auxano and the Vision Room. VisionRoom.com is an online gathering of articles, tools and resources designed for church leaders like you who value vision clarity and want to live out that vision in meaningful ways. For more information visit VisionRoom.com.

Feedback

If you have a question you would like answered on the show, fill out the form on the podcast page here at ThomRainer.com. If we use your question, you’ll receive a free autographed copy of I Am a Church Member.

Resources

Five Things You Should Know about Pastors’ Salaries
Five Reasons Your Pastor Will Not Ask for a Raise


Eight Common Money Questions Asked by Pastors


LifeWay Compensation Study

Friday Is for Freebies: HCSB Study Bible and I Am a Church Member

This week’s giveaway is a signed copy of my latest book I Am a Church Member.

Based on an idea originally taken from this blog, I Am a Church Member discusses the attitudes and responsibilities of church members. I address in detail what congregations should really be focusing on—praying for church leaders, being a functioning member, treasuring church membership, and more.

Six chapters with these titles include study questions to guide the discussion:

I Will Be a Unifying Church Member
I Will Not Let the Church Be About My Preferences and Desires
I Will Pray for My Church Leaders
I Will Lead My Family to Be Healthy Church Members
I Will Be a Functioning Member
I Will Treasure Church Membership as a Gift

Also included is the black, genuine leather version of the HCSB Study Bible, a comprehensive, easy to read, and easy to use Bible, with features and formats specifically designed to enhance your Bible study experience. You can also go to MyStudyBible.com and dive right in for a complete digital experience.

This Bible has a retail price of $79.99 and features 15,000 study notes, 290 Hebrew and Greek word studies, 66 highly detailed book introductions, 62 maps, 27 topical articles, 20 charts, and 18 illustrations, all focusing on the most important topics and questions in Bible study.

To enter the giveaway, tell us what your least favorite candy is.

PLEASE NOTE: The deadline to enter is 12:00 PM Central Time this Saturday.

By entering, you acknowledge and accept the terms of the promotion.

Notable Voices – October 31, 2013

The Pros and Cons of a Celebrity Pastor Culture — Carey Nieuwhof

The celebrity pastor culture is actually not a new concept. It’s something Paul addressed in his letters to the Corinthians. But we only hear the negative side. Carey shares how it actually can be a positive as well.

 

Jim Elliot’s Journal Entry with “He is No Fool…” Quote — Kevin Halloran

It’s one of our most well-known quotes, “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.” This week marked the 64th anniversary of the day Elliot penned those words. In this post, Kevin explores the journal entry containing them.

 

Are You Making These 8 Twitter Mistakes? — Michael Hyatt

Social media, and Twitter specifically, have become almost indispensable to ministry in the past few years. It’s amazing how such a simple technology can influence so many people. But are you using Twitter to its fullest? Michael shares eight mistakes you might unknowingly be making.

 

12 Random Tweetable Leadership Principles — Ron Edmondson

Ron is one of the best bloggers out there for Christian leadership principles and theory. If you’re a Christian leader, you need to be reading his blog. In this short post, he provides 12 tweetable leadership principles.

 

Measuring Church Health: How Many People Will Serve? — Tony Morgan

Tony continues to share valuable insights into church health statistics. In this post he explains how the percentage of a church’s staffing budget affects the percentage of people volunteering.

Five Questions to Ask to See If Your Church Is Dying

Please forgive me for the morbid and depressing title and content. I don’t think posts such as these encourage many of you.

I guess the impetus for writing such an article is the work I am doing to finish my next book, Autopsy of a Deceased Church. I have dealt a lot with the death of churches in my research and writing for that book.

The Research

Before I go further, let me define a dying church. A dying church is a congregation that will close its doors within 20 years if it continues its current trajectory. “Trajectory” includes many variables such as attendance, financial giving, demographic trends, and age of members.

Why would I include such a long period of 20 years in the definition? Simply put, churches hang on to life tenaciously. The members, despite how few remain, are highly reticent to close the doors of the church.

According to my estimates, about one in four American churches, or around 100,000 churches, fit the definition of a dying church. My estimates seem to have been confirmed with a recent study by LifeWay Research. The research team conducted telephone interviews with 1,007 Protestant pastors.* One of the response statements the team asked the pastors was: “I am concerned that the church where I am serving is dying.” Here are the responses:

Strongly agree: 7%
Somewhat agree: 15%
Somewhat disagree: 19%
Strongly disagree: 58%

So 22 percent of the pastors either strongly or somewhat agree that their churches are dying. That number is close to my own estimates of 25 percent. I would further postulate that another 25 percent of churches are struggling, and could move to the “dying” category easily.

The Questions

If one-fourth of churches are dying, and if another one-fourth of the churches are struggling, how can we discern signs of these problems before it’s too late? May I suggest five questions you can ask?

Has worship attendance declined in at least seven of the past ten years?
Has budget giving declined in at least seven of the past ten years?
Does my church look more like the community or less like the community than ten years ago?
Are church conflicts significantly more frequent today than past years?
Is your church’s budget decreasing its focus on reaching and ministering to others beyond the church?

Of course, these questions are not infallible indicators. They should, however, give a good indication if your church is directionally headed toward dying or not.

The Solution

The good news is that a number of churches, tens of thousand, are moving from death or decline to growth and life. I would love to hear from people in those churches.

What will it take to reverse the trends in dying churches? What has your church done to reverse that trend, or is your church firmly set to close its doors within the next several years?

*LifeWay Research conducted telephone interviews with 1,007 Protestant pastors from September 4, 2013 to September 9, 2013. The calling list was a stratified random sample drawn from a list of all Protestant churches. Each interview was conducted with the senior pastor or minister. Responses were weighted to reflect the geographic distribution and denominational groups of Protestant churches. The completed sample provides a 95% confidence that the sampling error does not exceed +/- 3.1%.

Why We Must Love Unlovable Church Members

By Chuck Lawless

I was a young pastor, and I was sure everybody in the church was kind, gracious, and Christian. Everybody would treat everybody else with the love of God. Needless to say, it didn’t take me long to learn that even in the church are people who don’t quite get there. Some people are really hard to love.

At the same time, I couldn’t avoid Jesus’ telling us to love God and neighbor (Matt. 22:34-40). Nor could I run from New Testaments commands that we love one another (1 Thess. 4:9, 1 Pet. 1:22, 1 John 3:23).  I would be lying to say I never struggle now, but I’ve learned something about loving others. Here are ten reasons why we must love even unlovable church members.

God loves them. I take these words literally: “For God loved the world in this way. . . .” (John 3:16). He loves the arrogant church member, the person caught in sin, and the follower who denies Him. That’s the point: He who loves all of us with an amazing love expects us to love others similarly.
We show the power of the gospel by loving all people.  Jesus said our love for one another would be one way to show the world His love (John 13:34-35). The church is indeed a miracle – people from varied backgrounds and different races, all loving each other as a family brought together by the blood of Jesus. Being family means we must love even those who occasionally drive the family crazy.
We live in Christian obedience when we show love toward all. Christian love, while not being devoid of emotion, is an active love, a doing love – evidenced by how we act toward others. Our faith does not allow us to say, “Because I just don’t love you any more, we can no longer be in relationship.” Rather, Christian love means we act as a Christian toward all people, even when our feelings aren’t there.
Some unlovable church members need Jesus. Let’s face it: Jesus had a fake in His followers, and we’re not going to do better than He did. Among a church family are likely to be those who believe they’re Christian, but who never truly repented and believed. They sometimes act as non-believers act . . . because that’s who they are. They need to see genuine Christian love so they might recognize their need for Christ.
Some unlovable church members are undiscipled believers acting like undiscipled people. Some believers have never been taught. Their churches led them to the Lord and baptized them, but they often did not pour themselves into these believers. Consequently, some church members are still babies in Christ, despite their years in the church. They need someone to help them see how much they need to grow – but it needs to be someone who truly loves them.
Love motivates our praying for unlovable church members. We can’t change unlovable people. No program will fix the person who is power hungry or judgmental. Lasting transformation occurs only under the power of God – and that means we must pray for even the church members we like the least. To not pray for them is to be unloving; indeed, it may be to be more like them than we care to admit.
Loving unlovable church members is an act of faith. Jesus called 12 men to follow Him, and they were not always lovable. They fought among themselves, didn’t always listen, and sought the best places in the kingdom. Still He loved them, knowing what the Father would do through them. We must love unlovable church members with that same kind of trust and faith.
Unlovable people are often loners, and loners need help winning spiritual battles. The church of Jesus Christ is designed to be a body, a family, an army, a people of God. We have never been intended to fight battles alone; instead, we fight together, guarding one another’s back. Loving an unlovable church member is one way of helping him fight spiritual battles he’s likely losing on his own.
Only genuine love allows us to carry out church discipline when needed. The time may come when a New Testament church must carry out the hard work of church discipline on an unlovable church member. When that happens, though, it must be motivated by, and carried out with, Christian love. Anything less becomes ungodly judgment.
We are all sometimes unlovable. All of us sometimes act less than Christian. Maybe nobody sees it, and perhaps it doesn’t happen often – but it’s still un-Christlike. We, too, will have those days when we need undeserved love. Perhaps others will model then the love we’ve first shown them.

Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary.

You can connect with Dr. Lawless on both Twitter and Facebook.

Why Don’t More Churches Have a Strategy to Start New Groups?

Admittedly, I have not done a scientific study on how many churches in America intentionally start new groups. But my anecdotal observations are that only about one in 20 churches, or about 5 percent, have a semblance of new groups strategy in place. Those numbers are sad, because such a strategy can be used of God to revolutionize churches.

I don’t plan on this article being one and done on the subject. It’s too important. You will hear more in the near future.

What Is a Group?

Different groups serve different purposes. Some exist for fellowship. Others have an intense discipleship motive. Still others are designed to reach beyond themselves with an evangelistic intent.

They also go by a myriad of names. They are called Sunday school classes, small groups, home groups, cell groups, Bible study classes, and more.

My point in this article is not to differentiate the groups; that exercise can come later. My point is to show the incredible value of groups in general to a church, especially when there is an intentional strategy to reproduce them.

What Can New Groups Do for a Church?

It almost seems like starting new groups is some type of secret strategy. You rarely hear church leaders speak about it. But those who have implemented such a strategy wondered what took them so long to do so. The value of starting new groups is enormous.

New groups create new fellowship patterns and can thus move a church from an inward focus to an outward focus.
Those who are in these groups regularly are more likely to share the gospel with someone than other church members. Group members share with people how to become a Christian 2.30 times in a six-month period, versus 0.98 times for other church members.
Those who are in groups are similarly more likely to invite an unchurched person to church than other church members (3.18 times in the last six months versus 1.24 times).
People who spend time in the Bible are most likely to show a number of signs of spiritual growth. Groups add at least a third opportunity to study the Bible, in addition to personal study and hearing the preaching of the Word.
Members who are active in starting new groups are less likely to be a divisive force in the church. They are too busy doing good things with their groups.

Can We Have a Resurgence of Groups?

For almost 100 years, 1860 to 1960, churches in America were highly intentional about starting new groups called Sunday school classes. Perhaps, because in many churches Sunday school became an end instead of a means, it faded in popularity and use.

There have been other resurgences of groups, but none to the extent of the Sunday school movement. Not coincidently, churches across America began declining after Sunday school waned and no other major groups movement replaced it.

I pray that every leader of a church will see the inestimable value of starting new groups. I pray that those leaders will be highly intentional and accountable for starting those groups, regardless of how you design them and regardless of what you call them.

We are beginning to see small signs of a resurgence of groups in churches in America. If this trend continues and grows, I would not be surprised to see a new level of growth and evangelism in our churches.

How do you develop a strategy for starting new groups? We will delve into that issue later. For now, please understand that every new group started in your church will have a multiplier impact on evangelism, discipleship, and fellowship.

Are you intentionally starting new groups in your church? If yes, what are your experiences? If not, why not? 

Pray for Michigan Christian Youth Camp

Location: Attica, Michigan

Pastor: Kevin O’Sullivan

Worship Time: 11:00 PM Eastern Time

Fast Facts: This house church meets on the campus of an established youth camp. The youth camp has been in existence since 1954. Please pray for continued guidance from the Lord as the church seeks to advance the Kingdom through the youth camps and through their campus church. Also pray as they invest in the future ministry of the youth camp through a campus event on November 2.

Website: www.mcyc.org

“Pray for . . .” is the Sunday blog series at ThomRainer.com. We encourage you to pray for these churches noted every Sunday. Please feel free to comment that you are praying as well.

If you would like to have your church featured in the “Pray for…” series, download this information form and return it to the address on the form.

Seven Ways Pastors (and Others) Can Develop Thicker Skin

Among my top five most frequented issues from pastors is criticism. The number of “bosses” a pastor has is equal to the number of members in the church. Some of those members are very opinionated. And some of those opinionated members are critics of the pastor.

So the common questions I get are:

How can I deal with critics and criticism?
How can a pastor get thicker skin without sacrificing a soft and compassionate heart?

Before I offer my suggestions, we must admit the realities of serving as a pastor. First, the nature of the vocation is that the pastor must often make demonstrative statements and definitive decisions. Such is the nature of preaching. Or counseling. Or teaching. Or leading. Those demonstrative statements and actions will inevitably engender opinions and perspectives from others.

Some will agree. Others will not. Some of the latter category will become your critics.

Second, a pastor has a definitive amount of time. Twenty fours in a day. Or 168 hours in a week. Thus the pastor must make time allocation decisions. Some people will not get the attention they think they deserve. It is impossible to meet everyone’s expectations. So some of those people will become critics as well.

Simply stated, critics and criticisms are inevitable for the pastor. They will not go away. Our purpose here is to suggest seven ways pastors can deal with them. I think all pastors need a preparatory course in developing thicker skin.

Don’t take most of the criticisms personally. Most of them are really not about you or your character. They are about a different opinion or perspective. And some may have no logical basis whatsoever. They can come from a person who is hurting deeply. I learned one time that one of my most vocal critics was dealing with the death of his son. He needed my compassion, not my defensiveness.
Pray for the critic. I shouldn’t be surprised, but I still am amazed at the power of prayer. And I have been amazed how many times my fallible perspective has changed when I started praying for my critic.
Develop a winsome spirit. Defensiveness and bitterness never help. Learn to laugh at yourself. Have a joyous spirit. Rejoice in the Lord always (there is something biblical about that).
Be a transparent leader. Criticism often goes to greater depths and frequency when there is a sense that the pastor is not being totally upfront on an issue or perspective. The transparent leader will be given the benefit of the doubt more times than not. That pastor will not eliminate criticisms, but those criticisms will be less frequent and intense.
Pray for your own attitude. Here’s that prayer thing again. Pastors are not perfect. They can have bad attitudes. They can see critics as the enemy. They can have a spirit of defensiveness and even retribution. Pastors must constantly be on guard with their own attitudes. They not only will deal with ministry more effectively and godly if they do, they will develop thicker skins for dealing with criticisms.
Focus on the majority. Almost all of the time, more people are with you than against you. The minority critics can seem so loud that we get the impression most everyone is against us. I recently heard from a pastor who decided to move to another church. When he announced his resignation to the congregation, they gave him a standing ovation of affirmation of his ministry. He said later that day that he probably would not have left had he known so many people supported him.
Look in the mirror. We are all wrong sometimes. Some of the criticisms are not without justification. The pastor will gain more respect and credibility with a response that admits wrong and apologizes.

Throughout biblical history and beyond, prophets, priests, and pastors have dealt with criticisms, adverse circumstances, and even persecution. The question is not whether tough times will come; they will. The question is how will you respond in those tough times.

Pastors who develop a thick skin are more likely to have joyful and long-term ministries. I have suggested seven ways to develop a thick skin. What would you change or add?