Rachel Kramer Bussel's Blog, page 34

New year, new book title: Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1

I've written about how it's a literary dream come true to have edited Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 , following in the footsteps of the series' first two editors, Marcy Sheiner and Violet Blue, whose previous volumes and other books I highly recommend. I'm a huge fan of their work and can literally remember my squeeing when I got acceptances to their editions of Best Women's Erotica (both published some of my favorite of my erotica stories).



One small but important detail that's different is that this new edition, which officially hits stores in print and ebook form January 12th but is shipping from the printer this week, is that there's no year number on the title, in keeping with Cleis Press's rebranding of all their annual series. For me, it's an exciting move because it means that bookstores won't immediately purge the book from their shelves the moment a new calendar year rolls around. My hope is that they will stock this first title for a long time, because I believe it's a keeper, the kind of book that, like many of my most beloved erotica books, readers will hold onto for a long time.

What's in it? I'll be sharing excerpts on blogs and other publications as we get closer to the pub date, and am about to finalize readings with contributors so you can hear these stories live and in person, but here's a little sampling:

a sexy séance in "Demimonde" by Valerie Alexander

a corporate retreat with a twist in "The Ropes" by Elise King

a woman who gets to meet the actor who played the superhero of her teenage dreams in "Starstruck" by Lazuli Jones

a futuristic science fiction story titled "The Altar of Lamented Toys" by Jessica Taylor

a sweet and sexy older woman/younger man story featuring Matilda from the S.E.C.R.E.T. trilogy in "Matilda's Secret" by L. Marie Adeline

some public femdom play in "Alvin's Night" by Elizabeth Caldwell

a masterful play on the senses and one of the best erotica stories I've ever read in "Enter Me" by Tabitha Rayne

a Port-a-Potty encounter with a transgender man in "Waiting to Pee" by Amy Butcher

a very kinky meal in "Two Doms for Dinner" by Dorothy Freed

a hot workplace lust and sex party tale with "The Assistant" by Tiffany Reisz

and much, much more!

If that intrigued you, here's where you can pre-order the book (and I will be updating the book's Twitter and Facebook as I hear about stores stocking it, but I can tell you now you will be able to find Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 at Good Vibrations):

Amazon (print)

Kindle

Barnes & Noble (print)

Nook

Powells

Books-a-Million

IndieBound (find your nearest local bookstore)

Cleis Press

Amazon UK (print)

Amazon UK Kindle

Amazon Canada (print)

Amazon Canada Kindle

Erotica writers: stay tuned, because I will be announcing a new call for submissions very soon. I will post on this blog, Lusty Lady, as well as in my monthly newsletter (where I also host monthly giveaways), and Tumblr, @raquelita on Twitter and my Facebook page and Erotica Readers & Writers Association.

My new book hits stores the day I'm moving, so my January's going to be busy

I only realized after I selected my moving day of January 12th that it's also the pub day for my most important anthology I've ever edited, Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 . Maybe that's fitting, because my last book, Dirty Dates, came out on my 40th birthday. But with under a month until I move and this book I'm so proud of entering the world, it's a bit of a hectic time. Moving throws your life into chaos, and your normal routines get upended. I've been thinking about the costs, which so far meant paying a security deposit and a month's rent in advance, and will include moving costs, but those seem minimal compared to all the time that's spent packing up our dishes and books and clothes and figuring out if we want to keep some random item we haven't used in years but still want to hold on to. Moving sucks up time and seems to expand to fill the time you previously thought of as "free," and then it does the same on the unpacking side.



If I've learned anything in the last four years of working for myself as a freelancer, it's that time is money. This year, much of my income was made by being able to say, "Yes, I'm available" at a moment's notice, or hopping on the phone at 11 p.m. to interview a source for a pop culture story unfolding over a weekend. That's an aspect of what I do that I both love and hate. If I wanted to, I could stay up writing until four in the morning, and sleep in. That's not what my daily life looks like, though. I usually am in bed by 10 or 10:30 at night and up by six, sometimes before. I probably don't use my time as wisely as I should, which is something I'm trying to change for the new year, but I certainly value it, both the time I spend actually writing, and the time it takes to send emails, make phone calls, transcribe interviews, research or simply daydream and dawdle and browse and then, through whatever synergy or luck or circumstance produces ideas, realize I've hit on a great topic for an article or essay or short story in my seemingly "mindless" mental wanderings.

Books are probably the primary thing I spend my time on: reading, rereading, browsing my bookshelves, browsing bookstores, adding items to my wishlist, perusing what's coming up or reading reviews or getting ideas for what I want to read next. The thing with me is that right now, I'm packing up my books, and since I just moved in June, I remember the painstaking process last time of packing them and then very carefully shelving them, and now I want to pull out ones to read that I either never have, or read so long ago I've largely forgotten them. I've transferred many to a shelf of "to read soon" books, because they're either advance copies of fascinating books coming out very soon or ones that I'd meant to read and just hadn't.

I'm also leaping headfirst into marketing Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 in a way I haven't done for my previous 60 anthologies (yes, I counted, and this is my 61st anthology). I decided that one of the things I hate about putting a book out into the world is the lack of control I have over how it does. I don't mean the lack of control over how readers perceive what's inside; the reading experience is theirs to appreciate in whatever way they see fit. Of course, I hope readers are as smitten with the stories as I am, but I can't control that.

What I can control is how much effort I put into making sure I know I did everything I could to make this book a success. Right now that means trying to schedule readings, posting interviews on Tumblr with my authors (and myself), reaching out to sex toy stores and bookstores and asking them to stock it, and generally spreading the word as much as I can. I'll be sharing more excerpts and details as the book gets closer to being available for purchase. I will also be using what I learned from this anthology to craft my next one (call for submissions is coming soon!), because while there were some authors I had hoped would submit to this book and some topics and characters who aren't in this book, the ones that are stand out to me so much.

I don't want the fact that both my pub date and my move a block away coincide mean doom for either one. The truth is, I won't have as much time on January 12th to devote to promoting my book. Maybe I'll finally learn Hootsuite and Tweet ahead. I'll sneak peeks at my phone while the movers are here. I'll post a lot the day before. But the truth is, a book launch doesn't happen in one day. I've been working hard on this book for weeks in the hopes that it does better than all my previous books, because I think it's that good and I want to honor the time and effort my authors put in by giving them a wide readership. I want them to get fan mail. I want people to say, "Wow, you really brought that hot black superhero actor from the 90's to life" or "wow, I didn't know séances could be so sexy" or "You made being passed between two men sound so sexy." I wish I could do a reading with all my contributors because I would love to hear them read the stories in their own voices (although I am beyond thrilled that Rose Caraway, my favorite audiobook narrator and a contributor of to the book with her story "The Carnalarium," will be narrating the audiobook version, which should be out in the first half of 2016).

So that's where my focus is these days, in addition to wrapping up some freelance writing and trying to read a few of the many, many books that I've accumulated over the past year(s). I'm not moving far, but between turning 40, a new calendar year and changing homes, I'm trying to use these new beginnings as a chance to push myself toward new directions, to think differently not just about material goods, but about what I want from my life, my work, my home. I'm also planning what I'll be doing in 2016, which will include teaching erotica writing classes for LitReactor, speaking and teaching at CatalystCon and new things like webinars.

I want to push myself to get past that learning curve, and the attendant fear that comes with it, to try things I've never done before. After all, in 2013, when I moved in with my boyfriend, I'd lived in the same apartment for 13 years. Moving petrified me, but I did it, then did it again in 2014, 2015 and now, I will again in 2016. I wouldn't say the moves themselves were fun, but each home has taught us something, and now, I've learned that I will happily stay in my little corner of suburbia for a decade, or even forever, if it means building a stable home. So in my working life, I'm ready to try new things too, knowing full well that some of them may fail, in order for me to learn from them and figure out how to succeed next time.

What my most recent students from my LitReactor erotica writing class said about it

I'm excited about my next LitReactor erotica writing class, which will run from February 11th to March 10th, 2016, because each class provides new opportunities for growth and learning, my own and my students'. Teaching it requires me to keep up with what editors, publishers and agents are looking for right now, which in turn has led me to wonderful authors and opportunities I wouldn't have known about otherwise. I'm happy to answer any questions you may have about the class (just email me at rachelkb at gmail dot com with "LitReactor" in the subject line), but I also think it's valuable to hear from actual students. I can tell you that in addition to the weekly written lectures (detailed here) and weekly writing assignments and critiques, I also offer over a dozen exclusive to the class Q&As with publishers, editors, literary agents and authors, as well as additional resources related to pseudonyms, author branding, finding your voice, joining the erotica writing community, incorporating sex in the news and more. There are some blurbs on the LitReactor website and in this older blog post. Additionally, here are two things students from my most recent LitReactor class, which ended this month, said:

"I will apply what I learned in 'Between the Sheets' to create stories that arouse and connect. With Rachel’s detailed ‘how to’ writing instructions, I completed six stories. My final product is tailored to a specific call for submission and ready to go. Rachel eased this newbie erotic writer into her world providing a comfortable environment to explore sexual ideas creatively. She gave me what I wanted even when I did not know what that was. I’m headed down a new path. Take her, it’s worth it." Donna Jennings

and

"I gained the confidence to just be fearless on the page." Z

I do strongly encourage my students to send their work out to publishers, not only because I want them to see their words published, but also because I believe it's a good process to go through, to craft a full story specifically catered toward a given call, but with their own unique spin on it. I'm spending the weeks until February 11th adding to the class's offerings to make it as timely and relevant as I can. Reminder: the registration price will go up on January 1st by $25, so if you are interested in the class, save money and register in 2015.

Read my LitReactor students' sexy stories in new oral sex anthology Licked

Last year, I took the erotica writing workshops I'd been teaching at sex toy stores, conferences and colleges and turned them into something new: a 4-week online erotica writing class called Between the Sheets at the literary website LitReactor. I'm gearing up to teach my sixth LitReactor class starting February 11th, 2016 and am so proud of my students and excited to continue to keep learning how to best serve them. (Note: The price of my new class will go up $25 on January 1st, so if you're interested in taking it, register by December 31st to get the best price. Registration will remain open until we reach the maximum of 16 students or through February 10th, whichever comes first.)

One of the things I'm most proud of is encouraging my students to submit their work to erotica publishers. That's what we spend a large part of our time in my LitReactor class working toward, and whether or not they're successful, I think submitting your work is a valuable experience, and a great first step toward getting readers.

So I was thrilled to see that the story "Feeding Her" by Suanne Schafer, which was started as part of my August-September 2015 LitReactor class, was just published in the House of Erotica oral sex anthology Licked , edited by Jillian Boyd. Plus one of my other previous LitReactor students, Jessica Taylor, also has a story, "Vapour, Venom, Oleander," in the book! Congratulations to them. Want to submit your erotic short stories (or longer works) to House of Erotica? Here's their guidelines. They have two current calls for submissions, one for Mad About the Boys, a male/male erotica anthology with a January 25th deadline, and Going Down, a hotel-set erotica anthology with a February 4th deadline.


image via Tumblr

In an interview with author Dale Cameron Lowry, here's what Suanne said:

What’s your story about?
In “Feeding Her,” two women must come to terms with one partner’s breast cancer.
What made you want to write a story for Licked?
I actually thought my story was too “serious” for erotica, but Rachel Kramer Bussel (Passion: Erotic Romance for Women, Best Bondage Erotica, Hide and Seek: Erotic Stories) encouraged me to submit it.

Here's more info on Licked, which you can purchase at Amazon US or Amazon UK:

Sit back and enjoy seven lip-smackingly sensual stories of all kinds of oral pleasure. Stories of nostalgia for the taste of a lover, long distance relationships, and revenge. Stories taking in both the distant future and pleasures in the past. Oracles, ranchers and café cooks, all united by their love of using their mouth. And tongue. And fingers, for assistance.

Edited by Jillian Boyd (Spy Games – Flappers, Jazz and Valentino) Licked is a tribute to the act of oral sex – to the intimacy, trust and the taste of your lover, the scent, the feelings the act invokes in both the giver and receiver. With stories from the likes of Rob Rosen, Jessica Taylor and Dale Cameron Lowry, Licked is a sizzling fictional exploration of some of the many ways oral sex can inspire so much more than just a hot flash of arousal.

Come in. Have a taste.

Talking sex, BDSM, Dirty Dates, erotica, writing, editing and more on Girl Boner podcast with August McLaughlin

Yesterday I had a great time chatting with August McLaughlin on her Girl Boner podcast, about what I learned about sex growing up, erotica writing and editing, BDSM, Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples and more. I hope you'll check it out and I highly recommend subscribing to Girl Boner in iTunes or Stitcher and checking out August's upcoming book Embraceable , which I'm eagerly awaiting.

Help me spread the word about Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 with Thunderclap

A warning: you may soon get sick of me gushing about Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 (link to brand new official site, which will have more info on it soon). I promise this blog won't exclusively turn into a why-I'm-so-excited-about-my-new-book blog, but I hope you'll indulge me a little. I'm moving in January, just a block away, but have started packing. The first thing to be packed were my two perfectly organized bookcases, filled about 3/4 of the way with anthologies I've edited or contributed to, plus other beloved books.



Taking that trip down memory lane reminded me, yet again, of how far I've come. Sometimes I have flashbacks to sobbing at my desk near South Street Seaport during a job somewhere around my law school days in the late 90's whose exact purpose I can't quite remember. My life back then was basically me running from one disaster to the next. I never let myself step back and say, What do I really want to do with my life? because I was afraid of what the answer would be. (Truth: sometimes I'm still afraid of that question, but now I ask it anyway.)

Flash forward 16 or so years later, and I sometimes have to pinch myself because, while my life isn't perfect, I've accomplished so many things I wouldn't even let myself imagine back then. I never want to forget the milestones along the way, and I never want to stop encouraging other people to pursue their dreams. How did I wind up with my 61st anthology about to be published? It started with one story, my very first, "Monica and Me."



Then another one, then another one, and so on. Then I got asked to co-edit an anthology. Back then, I used Erotica Readers & Writers Association (though I'm pretty sure it was titled just Erotica Readers Association when I started out) to find out where to submit work, which I still do, along with social media.

I'm not suggesting it's all been a breeze, but I am stating firmly that my journey to editing 61 anthologies began with one story, driven by my personal fascination with Monica Lewinsky. Now when I read or hear that story, I hear the parts that I would change if I were writing it now, but I'm still so proud of it, because it set me off into this world. Did I have a master plan back then? Hardly. I was figuring out my life post-law school, grappling with the first and still most epic failure of my life, but I was drawn to this form of writing. I'd never written fiction before (save for a childhood short story, of the very G-rated kind) but I'd been reading lots of erotica, and I was drawn to it, so I went for it. That's pretty much how I got started. I didn't research, save for all the reading I'd been doing for fun. I think what made that story sell to two anthologies (Starf*cker and Best Lesbian Erotica 2001) is that it was a unique take on a ubiquitous person, and that I put myself into the story. In my case, literally, with a character named Rachel, but what I mean here is that I put a topic I had a personal interest in into my fiction. That's not necessarily the case for every fiction or nonfiction piece I've written since, but the stories of mine I feel have best stood the test of time are the ones that have the most "me" in them. If I had to boil down my advice for new erotica writers, that would be it: put yourself into the story. Not literally per se, but your passion, your knowledge, your interests, your humanity. (Want daily advice from me and four weeks of in-depth work? Take my next LitReactor 4-week online erotica writing class, which runs February 11-March 10.)

You can read my introduction to Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1 on Tumblr, where you'll also find a Q&A with me about my second person story "Flying Solo". If you want to show your support for the book, I'd love if you'd join the Thunderclap campaign. You select your Facebook, Twitter or Tumblr account (or all three!) and essentially let Thunderclap post one time, on January 12th, letting your followers know the book is out. The idea behind it is to do a social media blast at the same time en masse, to get the most traction on publication day. I would greatly appreciate it, and can thank you (if you're in the U.S.) by (just fill out that Wufoo form and I'll send it right off). Or just know that you have my many thanks! I'm devoting most of my December and January, when not packing or writing, to marketing and promoting this book because I am so proud of it and want my authors to be as widely read as possible.

Anything you can do to spread the word, whether in person or online, is much appreciated. You can also keep up with BWE of the Year (for short, since I know the title is super long!) on Facebook and @BWEoftheYear on Twitter. Writers: stay tuned for a new call for submissions from me, coming soon, which will be posted on my Lusty Lady blog, as well as Twitter, Facebook and in my monthly newsletter.

I watched Elf starring Will Ferrell for the first time and talked about it on the podcast Movies My Friends Have Never Seen

Until a few weeks ago, I had never seen the film Elf. Now I have, thanks to my friend Nick Nadel, who invited me on his podcast Movies My Friends Have Never Seen.



I even stayed awake the whole time! Also discussed: the famous film my uncle was in, my boyfriend's frustration that I haven't seen so many classic films (which he wrote about in his play), and a segue into Fifty Shades of Grey (yes, really) and sexy movies. Check it out, and I recommend the rest of the podcast too. I plan to be back on in 2016! Feel free to laugh at me just as much as my boyfriend does, and I welcome suggestions about what movies I should watch next.

Burning down the house (almost), or why I need a mindfulness crash course

A few days ago, for the second time since I moved into my current apartment in June, I left a pot of boiling water on the stove in the kitchen, went into my bedroom/office, and promptly forgot I had intended to make tea. No, after the first time, a few months ago, I foolishly did not buy a whistling tea kettle. Instead, I vowed, to myself and my boyfriend, "I'll never walk away when I'm boiling water." Well, you can tell how well that turned out.

When I did emerge from my internet stupor (I had come into my room to check "one little thing," which turned into over an hour online), I realized what I'd done and was first grateful that only the pot had burned. I immediately put it in the sink, doused it in water, and opened the living room windows and door.

Mostly, I felt stupid. Here I am, 40 years old, and I literally don't know how to boil water. Well, I do know, but I'm so distracted with deadlines and book promotion and seemingly "urgent" tasks that I forget the most basic thing I need to care for: myself and my safety.

The automatic fan eventually subsided, the apartment cooled off, and I debated whether or not to tell my boyfriend what happened. I didn't want to, because I already feel like the slacker in our relationship, by far the least adult even though I'm two and a half years older than him. I was sure he'd be angry at me, as he should have been.

When he got home about an hour later, there was little evidence of what I'd done, save for a slightly charred pot. "What's wrong?" he asked immediately, because I have no poker face, and it was clear I was miserable. I told him. He immediately hugged me and assured me that since I hadn't, in fact, burned the house down, it was okay. I'd been browsing tea kettles on Amazon, ready to buy one, but he told me to wait until Christmas, which is only a few weeks away.

"But what if I do it again?" I asked.

"Just don't leave the kitchen if you're boiling water," he responded.

"Or I could use the microwave to make tea," I suggested.

Eventually, I got over berating myself, but I know it was a sign that I need to pay more attention, not just in the kitchen, but in all areas of my life. For most of my working life, I've run my schedule with the assumption that the more frantic I feel, the harder I'm working, and therefore the more successful I'll be. But this year has taught me that not only is that franticness deeply unhealthy, no matter how harried I make myself or how many hours I put in just to feel "productive," I still have limits, and will still hit barriers, and will still fail.

And that's all okay. The trick is to keep going, to not wallow in that failure. To remind myself that I didn't actually do any damage to myself. That, like every other time I fuck up, my job is to learn from my mistakes and do my best to make different choices next time. This applies to every area of my life that could use work: my health, my sleep, my time management, my money management, the attention I pay to my boyfriend, how much stuff I own or don't own. Sometimes all I can see when I look around is where I need to improve, and then I feel so hopeless that being mindful doesn't even enter the picture, because I'm beyond that point. So my goal not just for the new year, but for this very second, is to stay in a realm where I can be mindful, be grateful, and focus on the next right step I need to take. And hopefully not burn down my home-for-five-more-weeks in the process.

A brand new free erotica story that I'm glad got rejected the first time

I'll be writing more about how to handle writing rejection and turn it into a positive step for your career soon, but today I want to highlight one example. My story "Spitting Image" is up today at Tamsin Flowers' Supererotica Advent calendar. I recommend reading all the entries; you can start with day 1, which features "Fallen" by Tamsin Flowers.



She's asking readers to donate to these charities, if you're so inclined: Crisis, The Albert Kennedy Trust or Coalition for the Homeless.

I'm thrilled to have a new, original story free for you to read, because most of my writing lately has been nonfiction, with my only new erotic fiction stories appearing in my recent and upcoming anthologies such as Come Again, Dirty Dates and Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1.

What's especially gratifying for me about this particular story is that I had submitted it to an anthology and gotten good feedback on it, only to later have it be rejected. Of course, I was disappointed. I wondered: What's wrong with my oral sex sensuous spit story? Was I foolish to expect it to make the cut? Am I bad at the male POV?

But then I smartly shook my head, drew up my shoulders, and decided to send my little tale out in the world. I was proud of it and didn't need to take one person's no for an answer. So I sent it to Tamsin and she loved it! Now, I'm not saying it's "good" because someone else approved of it; I don't believe in that. "Good" is by and large subjective—and yes, I say that as someone who teaches erotica writing classes and does believe anyone, certainly including myself, can improve and deepen their writing. But at the end of the day, you can't make someone like your work. You can't insist they read it or appreciate it. You can only work to find what Jennifer Lee calls in Building Your Business the Right-Brain Way your "right peeps." Tamsin is one of my right peeps, and I'm thrilled she chose my story for her project.

No matter what form it takes, rejection isn't fun. I'm actually already dreading having to do it for my next call for submissions, which I hope to have posted in the next few weeks (yes, it's awful to be on the side doing the rejecting too). But it's also part of writing (and dare I say, also part of life), and is why I recommended the podcast Behind the Prose with Keysha Whitaker, because in one episode I listened to, she said, "Getting rejected is part of the process. If you're not getting rejected, that means you're not writing." Sorry, I can't remember the exact episode, but what's great about her podcast is she opens by talking about her writing acceptances and rejections. She normalizes rejection, which is good because she's absolutely right: whether you're talking about fiction or nonfiction, rejection is part and parcel of the process of sending out your work.

The only way to never get rejected is to never submit anything, which is also a valid choice, and not one I mean to malign, but if your goal is to be read by a wide audience, unless you're building that audience via self-publishing or a blog or podcast or some other means, you will need to risk your work being rejected by someone. Once, I was determined to break into a certain online literary journal. I thought that doing so would mean I'd "made it," that I was smart and cool and as good a writer as someone I was desperately jealous of. I submitted three times (and this is one that charges a small fee to submit) before I realized I was doing it for the wrong reasons. I didn't stop submitting because I was afraid of rejection, which had already happened, but because that particular quest was pointless and the rejections were hitting me way too hard (so hard that one led to one of the worst and craziest decisions of my life, which is also a story for another day, but let's just say something illegal was involved in my post-rejection stupor).

I made the leap of risking rejection with this story, "Spitting Image," twice; once my story got the boot, and once it got a thumbs up. It's still the same story, and it's not a "better" or "sexier" story because someone said yes to it. What it is is available for you to read for free. I hope you like it!

Feminism meets art meets technology with Pussy Bow scarves imprinted with images from inside artist Christen Clifford's vagina

The news this week is by and large awful, with shootings and violence and other atrocities. So to lighten the mood, here's my profile of the Pussy Bow scarf, imprinted with an image from inside a woman's vagina. Yes, really. Learn how and why artist Christen Clifford made them at The Daily Dot, and why she's donating 10% of the proceeds to Planned Parenthood.