Rachel Kramer Bussel's Blog, page 138
November 17, 2011
Reading tonight at 7 at KGB Bar
My last reading of 2011 is tonight at KGB Bar at 7 for Drunken! Careening! Writers! It's free. And fun!KGB Bar85 E. 4th StreetNYCDrunken Careening WritersKGB Bar, 85 East 4th StreetNew York City, NYNovember 17, 20117:00 pm - 9:00 pmSally Bellerose is author of The Girls Club. She was awarded a Fellowship in Literature from the National Endowment for the Arts based on an excerpt from this novel. The manuscript won the Bywater Prize for Fiction and was a finalist for the James Jones Fellowship, the Thomas Wolfe Fiction Prize, and the Bellwether Endowment. Sally is also a poet who loves rhythm, story, and language. Her poems and prose usually involve themes of sexuality, illness, and class. In writing, she is interested in messy, confusing, complicated relationships. She is also drawn to humor and transcendence. Sally is old and tired of ageism. The title story of her next book Fishwives won the Saints and Sinners Fiction Award. Fishwives features old women behaving badly.Rachel Kramer Bussel is an author, editor, blogger and event organizer. She is the editor of over 40 anthologies, most recently Obsessed, Women in Lust and Best Bondage Erotica 2012. She writes the Secrets of a Sex Writer column for SexIs Magazine and writes widely on sex, dating, books and pop culture. She blogs at Lusty Lady and Cupcakes Take the Cake.Meri Weiss was born and raised in New York. She has a BA in English from the University of Michigan, an MFA in Creative Writing from Southampton College, an MA in Literature from SUNY New Paltz and a boatload of student loans someone really ought to pay back. She teaches full-time at the South Bronx campus of the College of New Rochelle and part-time at the Lincoln Center campus of Fordham University. Her debut novel, Closer to Fine, was published by Kensington Books in 2008 and nominated for a Lambda Literary Award. She is currently working on her second novel.
December 5th = celebrate 7 years of cupcake blogging!
Can you believe I've been cupcake blogging for 7 years? I can, and I can't. I mean, it's such a huge part of my life, and I have a glimmer of having the idea, back in the days of comedy and contest blogging, but still, it seems surreal. So we are having a party and there will be probably more cupcakes than you can imagine. We'll be updating the sponsors as they come in, but it's a great list. Get your ticket now! December 5th, 7-10 pm, SoHo Gallery of Digital Art, 138 Sullivan Street, NYC.
I hate Blogger with a passion
One thing I like about new Blogger: tags.
Everything else I hate about it, like the fact that here and at Cupcakes Take the Cake at least every other post yields an error. That means I can't save as draft, so I can either save the html in a word document or do what feels like a mad dash - write the whole error-laden post, then rush to start a new one, click "publish" and hope it goes through. Often it does, but sometimes it doesn't. FRUSTRATING. I feel so inept and stupid and aggravated by it. I have this great post that is waiting for...who the fuck knows what? Clearly, not me, or I wouldn't be getting the same damn error message a million times a day.
That is all. I hate technology sometimes. This was a week where often getting out of bed was an effort, and I'm still sorting out which health insurance is the lesser of many evils, so I don't have the pretty pills I went to the doctor for on my birthday, which makes dealing with the hell that is Blogger a little more challenging. So if things look screwy on my blogs, that's why. On a happy note, makes me grateful Tumblr exists!
Everything else I hate about it, like the fact that here and at Cupcakes Take the Cake at least every other post yields an error. That means I can't save as draft, so I can either save the html in a word document or do what feels like a mad dash - write the whole error-laden post, then rush to start a new one, click "publish" and hope it goes through. Often it does, but sometimes it doesn't. FRUSTRATING. I feel so inept and stupid and aggravated by it. I have this great post that is waiting for...who the fuck knows what? Clearly, not me, or I wouldn't be getting the same damn error message a million times a day.
That is all. I hate technology sometimes. This was a week where often getting out of bed was an effort, and I'm still sorting out which health insurance is the lesser of many evils, so I don't have the pretty pills I went to the doctor for on my birthday, which makes dealing with the hell that is Blogger a little more challenging. So if things look screwy on my blogs, that's why. On a happy note, makes me grateful Tumblr exists!
Today's stop on the Women in Lust virtual book tour is at...
Today's stop on the Women in Lust virtual book tour is at The Smutketeers, where I wrote a little about the book and they've got an excerpt from Shanna Germain's very edgy knife play story "Beneath My Skin," probably the kinkiest story in the book! And a contest to win a copy. Enjoy!
New sex column: "Dear Redheads: I'll Take Your Sperm!"
My latest sex column for SexIs Magazine is "Dear Redheads: I'll Take Your Sperm!", responding to the fact that the world's largest sperm bank no longer accepts donations from redheads.
November 16, 2011
Portland, Maine plans
I'm going to Portland, Maine for the first time this weekend, and have lots of plans, including visiting one of my oldest friends (who sent me a birthday car asking if I wanted to take a burlesque class or a pole-dancing class!), getting a tattoo at Sanctuary Tattoo, tasting the local cupcakes, sampling food (still making lists), meeting Fury author Elizabeth Miles and seeing art. A few things I plan to see are:
Addicted to Love art exhibit by Eric Hou at The Green Hand
"Faces of War: A Photographic Essay Exhibition at UNE
Portland Museum of Art
Addicted to Love art exhibit by Eric Hou at The Green Hand
"Faces of War: A Photographic Essay Exhibition at UNE
Portland Museum of Art
Read this: Black Market Billions
My friend Hitha Prabhakar, Bloomberg reporter and retail fashion expert, just wrote a book I highly recommend (full disclosure: I'm still reading it, but I can say it's fascinating and eye-opening) called
Black Market Billions: How Organized Retail Crime Funds Terrorists
. Official description from Amazon:
Black Market Billions blows the lid off the world's fastest-growing illicit industry: organized retail crime. Hitha Prabhakar reveals how criminals with ties to terrorist groups around the world are committing huge product thefts, and using the profits to fund terrorist acts. Prabhakar connects the dots and follows the money… from consumers "dying for a deal" to terrorist cells eager to do the killing.
"...Illuminates how organized retail crime (ORC) thrives amid a recessive economy as penny-pinching consumers turn to cheaper ways of purchasing everything from luxury items to prescription and over-the-counter drugs. Prabhakar's indignation is well supported by chapters on the many interlocking facets of black-market thievery...Sharp-pencil analysis on the seemingly futile battle against retail fraud." (Used with permission from Kirkus Reviews Online)
Photo below is from her book party, by Stacie Joy.
. Official description from Amazon:Black Market Billions blows the lid off the world's fastest-growing illicit industry: organized retail crime. Hitha Prabhakar reveals how criminals with ties to terrorist groups around the world are committing huge product thefts, and using the profits to fund terrorist acts. Prabhakar connects the dots and follows the money… from consumers "dying for a deal" to terrorist cells eager to do the killing.
"...Illuminates how organized retail crime (ORC) thrives amid a recessive economy as penny-pinching consumers turn to cheaper ways of purchasing everything from luxury items to prescription and over-the-counter drugs. Prabhakar's indignation is well supported by chapters on the many interlocking facets of black-market thievery...Sharp-pencil analysis on the seemingly futile battle against retail fraud." (Used with permission from Kirkus Reviews Online)
Photo below is from her book party, by Stacie Joy.
November 14, 2011
Sex Diary: "The 53-Year-Old Man With Trouble Climaxing"
This week's sex diary (I'm the editor): "The 53-Year-Old Man With Trouble Climaxing" - Personally I appreciate when people portray their struggles with sex, especially in a relationship, where I think there's the tendency to paint everything as perfect.
Highly recommended: PJ Walsh show about comedy, military, Bill Clinton's teeth
I highly, highly recommend this show by PJ Walsh at All for One Fest. It's been my favorite so far. Comedy, war, Camp David, Bill Clinton's teeth. Plus there was bonus standup at the end. I also think it's wonderful to see successful performers talk about how college wasn't right for them, and they went on to do what they love and are good at and succeed at it, on their terms. Hilarious and also touching, and a good reminder that "support the troops" shouldn't just be empty rhetoric. I say this having never heard of PJ Walsh before perusing the AFO listings. He worked the room incredibly well (especially when he was doing a sargeant impersonation and a woman had to go to the bathroom). Also...since I was staring at him on stage for almost two hours, he has really nice biceps, and I am not usually someone who notices these things. Truly, the whole show impressed me and if I were in town next weekend I might go back with friends. I love comedy that does more than just make people laugh (not that there is anything wrong with making people laugh, and in fact, the whole point of the show, or one of them, is that laughter is vital, whether we are on the brink of death or not. Seeing the smiles on the faces of the servicemembers in the slideshow--wide, wide, smiles--was pretty amazing. I've now seen 4 shows and 3 pieces of shows at AFO Fest, and this one truly stood out in a big, big way. Check it out.
OVER THERE: Comedy Is His Best Weapon
Winner ”Best Of Fringe” Hollywood & San Francisco Fringe Festivals 2011
Sat. Nov. 12th. @9PM & Sun. Nov. 20th. @9PM
Theatre 80 St. Marks - 80 St. Marks (just west of 1st ave) New York, NY 10003
Tickets: $20.00 (Portion of proceeds will go to Veterans) Buy tickets online HERE
Pre-order this: Best Sex Writing 2012!
As I posted on Twitter, when you pre-order a book, you're both buying your single copy and signaling to the store that there's so much interest in the book that they should stock up. Whether that's Amazon or your local indie bookstore or wherever, every little bit helps, and more than any of my other books, this is the one that I'm most proudest of and that I think will hold up in ten or twenty years. As timely as some of the pieces are, unless our entire culture changes into a sex-positive one, we will be facing dealing with "sluts," homophobia, insane sex scandals and more well into the future, and these thinkers have some profound things to say about these topics. Also, I'll link to the Kindle and Nook editions as soon as they're for sale (probably January 10th), but this book will be in stock by the end of December at stores, probably a little sooner. Basically, this is my 42nd book, and I'd say, if you've never read any of them, read this one. (Love the rest, but this feels like my best work and the book of mine I'd most want to take to a desert island.) A quick and easy way to help the book? Click "like" on its Amazon page!
It has an instant and powerful effect, and in an age when book publishing is, shall we say, a precarious profession, I strongly encourage you as book consumers to do so if you're sure you want to read the book. And, well, I don't think I need to do a hard sell on Best Sex Writing 2012 once you see the lineup below. It touches on culture, education, religion, the law, the military, New York City, circumcision, SlutWalk, butch femme, sex work, gender roles, sex scandals, monogamy and nonmonogamy, queerness and many other topics. It's a truly powerful collection I'm incredibly proud of and I hope you enjoy it too. I'm working on NYC, Seattle and Bay Area readings (possibly others, time/money/venue permitting).
Best Sex Writing 2012: The State of Today's Sexual Culture is a nonfiction anthology edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel, with Susie Bright as guest judge, to be published by Cleis Press in January 2012. It is available for pre-order at Amazon (other links below). Email bestsexwriting2012 at gmail.com if you have any questions; to request a review copy, email Brenda Knight at bknight at cleispress.com. Stay tuned for details about the virtual book tour and readings in NYC, Seattle and San Francisco. For more information about the Best Sex Writing series, visit www.bestsexwriting.com.
Pre-order Best Sex Writing 2012:
Amazon
Kindle (coming soon)
BN.com
Nook (coming soon)
Powell's
Books-a-Million
IndieBound (find your local independent bookstore
Cleis Press
Table of contents:
When the Sex Guru Met the Sex Panic Susie Bright
Beyond the Headlines: Real Sex Secrets Rachel Kramer Bussel (see below)
Sluts, Walking Amanda Marcotte
Criminalizing Circumcision: Self-Hatred as Public Policy Marty Klein
The Worship of Female Pleasure Tracy Clark-Flory
Sex, Lies, and Hush Money Katherine Spillar
The Dynamics of Sexual Acceleration Chris Sweeney
Atheists Do It Better: Why Leaving Religion Leads to Better Sex Greta Christina
To All the Butches I Loved between 1995 and 2005: An Open Letter about Selling Sex, Selling Out, and Soldiering On Amber Dawn
I Want You to Want Me Hugo Schwyzer
Grief, Resilience, and My 66th Birthday Gift Joan Price
Latina Glitter Rachel Rabbit White
Dating with an STD Lynn Harris
You Can Have Sex With Them; Just Don't Photograph Them Radley Balko
An Unfortunate Discharge Early in My Naval Career Tim Elhajj
Guys Who Like Fat Chicks Camille Dodero
The Careless Language of Sexual Violence. Roxane Gay
Men Who "Buy Sex" Commit More Crimes: Newsweek, Trafficking, and the Lie of Fabricated Sex Studies Thomas Roche
Taking Liberties Tracy Quan
Why Lying about Monogamy Matters Susie Bright
Losing the Meatpacking District: A Queer History of Leather Culture Abby Tallmer
Penis Gagging, BDSM, and Rape Fantasy: The Truth about Kinky Sexting Rachel Kramer Bussel
Adrian's Penis: Care and Handling Adrian Colesberry
The Continuing Criminalization of Teen Sex Ellen Friedrichs
Love Grenade Lidia Yuknavitch
Pottymouth Kevin Sampsell
Beyond the Headlines: Real Sex SecretsRachel Kramer Bussel
I think about sex a lot—every day, in fact. I don't mean that in an "I want to get it on" way, but in a "What are other people up to?" way. I'm a voyeur, first and foremost, and this extends to my writing. I'm naturally curious about what other people think about sex, from their intimate lives to how their sexuality translates to the larger world.
With the Best Sex Writing series, I get to merge my voyeuristic self with my journalism leanings, and peek into the lives, public and private, of those around me. This volume in the series doesn't pull any punches; the authors have strong opinions, whether it's Marty Klein sticking up for circumcision in the face of an effort in California to criminalize it, Roxane Gay taking the New York Times to task for its treatment of an 11-year-old rape victim, Thomas Roche calling out Newsweek for its shoddy reporting about prostitution, or Radley Balko examining a child pornography charge.
There are also more personal takes on sex here that go beyond facile headlines or easy answers, that aren't about making a point so much as exploring what real-life sex is like in all its beauty, drama, and messiness. Whether it's Amber Dawn and Tracy Quan sharing the truth about their lives as sex workers, or Hugo Schwyzer explaining the damage our culture does to men with its mythology about their innate sexual prowess, or Tim Elhajj's first-person account of pre–don't ask, don't tell military life, these authors show you a side of sex that you rarely see.
What you are about to read are stories, all true, some reported on the streets and some recorded from lived experience, from the front lines of sexuality. They deal with topics you read about in the headlines, and some topics you may never have considered. They are but a small sampling of the many kinds of sexual stories I received in the submission process.
Part of why I think sex never goes out of style, as a topic or activity, is that it is so very complex. There is no one way to do it, nor two, nor three. Sex can be mundane or mind-blowing, and for those who are trying to get from the former to the latter, there is a plethora of resources but also a host of misinformation purveyed by snake oil salesmen.
In Best Sex Writing 2012, you will read about subjects as diverse as "Guys Who Like Fat Chicks," the care an handling of a man's penis, and the glamour and glitter of the Latina drag world. Abby Tallmer, telling a story set in a very specific time and place—the gay leather clubs of New York's Meatpacking District in the 1990s—manages to capture why sexual community is so vital, and why, I'd venture, those who lack such a community wind up mired in sex scandals. Tallmer writes, "These clubs gave us a place to feel that we were no longer outsiders—or rather, they made us feel that it was better to be outsiders, together, than to force ourselves to be just like everybody else."
I'm especially pleased to present stories about the kinds of sexuality and sexual issues that don't always make the headlines, from Lynn Harris's investigation of dating with an STD to Hugo Schwyzer's moving look at men's need to be sexually desired and what happens when boys and men are told that that wanting to be desired is wrong. Joan Price gives some insight into elder sexuality, as well as into what it's like to purchase the services of a sexual healer. The topic of elder sex is often treated with horror or disgust, or the focus is placed on concern over STDs—which is a worthy topic this series has explored before. But Price, author of two books on elder sexuality (her piece here is excerpted from Naked At Our Age), obliges the reader to see the humanity behind her age. She writes, "My birthday erotic massage from a gentle stranger changed something in me. It showed me that I was still a responsive, fully sexual woman, getting ready to emerge from the cocoon of mourning into reexperiencing life. I realized that one big reason I ended up on Sunyata's massage table was so that I could get ready to reenter the world."
Not all, or even most, of the reading here is "easy." Much of it is challenging and heartbreaking. Roxane Gay's media criticism centers on a New York Times story about a Texas gang rape and why "The Careless Language of Sexual Violence" distorts our understanding about rape. You may think such a piece doesn't belong in an anthology with this title, but until we rid our world of sexual violence so that everyone can freely express themselves sexually, we need to hear searing indictments of media or those in power who ignore injustice.
As an editor, I'm not only looking for pieces that I agree with, or identify with, but for work that illuminates something new about a topic that's been around forever. The authors here dig deep, challenging both mainstream ideas about sex and a few sex-positive sacred cows. Ellen Friedrichs sticks up for the right of teenagers to be sexual without throwing parents, school boards, and other adults into a sex panic. Amanda Marcotte explores the fast-moving SlutWalk protest phenomenon, which has garnered criticisms from various sides, from being futile to only appealing to white women.
I will quote Abby Tallmer again, because I don't hear the words "sexual liberation" often enough these days. What moves me most about her piece is that you don't have to be a New Yorker, queer, leather, or kinky to understand what she's talking about. I'm 100 percent with her when she writes, "Back then, many of us believed that gay liberation was rooted in sexual liberation, and we believed that liberation was rooted in the right—no, the need—to claim ownership of our bodies, to experience and celebrate sexuality in as many forms as possible, limited only by our time and imagination." I hope this applies in 2012 just as much as it did in the 1970s, 80s, or 90s.
The truth is, I could have filled a book twice this size. Every day, stories are breaking, and being told, about sex—some wondrous, some heartbreaking. This is not a one-handed read, but it is a book that will stimulate your largest sex organ: your brain. Whether you live and breathe sex, you are curious about sex, or somewhere in between, I hope Best Sex Writing 2012 informs, incites, and inspires you. I hope it inspires you to write and tell your own sexual story, because I believe the more we talk about the many ways sex moves us, the more we work toward a world where sexual shame, ignorance, homophobia, and violence are diminished.
I'd love to hear your thoughts about this book and what you think are the hot topics around sex. Feel free to email me at rachel at bestsexwriting.com with your comments and suggestions for next year's anthology.
Rachel Kramer BusselNew YorkNovember 2011
It has an instant and powerful effect, and in an age when book publishing is, shall we say, a precarious profession, I strongly encourage you as book consumers to do so if you're sure you want to read the book. And, well, I don't think I need to do a hard sell on Best Sex Writing 2012 once you see the lineup below. It touches on culture, education, religion, the law, the military, New York City, circumcision, SlutWalk, butch femme, sex work, gender roles, sex scandals, monogamy and nonmonogamy, queerness and many other topics. It's a truly powerful collection I'm incredibly proud of and I hope you enjoy it too. I'm working on NYC, Seattle and Bay Area readings (possibly others, time/money/venue permitting).
Best Sex Writing 2012: The State of Today's Sexual Culture is a nonfiction anthology edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel, with Susie Bright as guest judge, to be published by Cleis Press in January 2012. It is available for pre-order at Amazon (other links below). Email bestsexwriting2012 at gmail.com if you have any questions; to request a review copy, email Brenda Knight at bknight at cleispress.com. Stay tuned for details about the virtual book tour and readings in NYC, Seattle and San Francisco. For more information about the Best Sex Writing series, visit www.bestsexwriting.com.
Pre-order Best Sex Writing 2012:
Amazon
Kindle (coming soon)
BN.com
Nook (coming soon)
Powell's
Books-a-Million
IndieBound (find your local independent bookstore
Cleis Press
Table of contents:
When the Sex Guru Met the Sex Panic Susie Bright
Beyond the Headlines: Real Sex Secrets Rachel Kramer Bussel (see below)
Sluts, Walking Amanda Marcotte
Criminalizing Circumcision: Self-Hatred as Public Policy Marty Klein
The Worship of Female Pleasure Tracy Clark-Flory
Sex, Lies, and Hush Money Katherine Spillar
The Dynamics of Sexual Acceleration Chris Sweeney
Atheists Do It Better: Why Leaving Religion Leads to Better Sex Greta Christina
To All the Butches I Loved between 1995 and 2005: An Open Letter about Selling Sex, Selling Out, and Soldiering On Amber Dawn
I Want You to Want Me Hugo Schwyzer
Grief, Resilience, and My 66th Birthday Gift Joan Price
Latina Glitter Rachel Rabbit White
Dating with an STD Lynn Harris
You Can Have Sex With Them; Just Don't Photograph Them Radley Balko
An Unfortunate Discharge Early in My Naval Career Tim Elhajj
Guys Who Like Fat Chicks Camille Dodero
The Careless Language of Sexual Violence. Roxane Gay
Men Who "Buy Sex" Commit More Crimes: Newsweek, Trafficking, and the Lie of Fabricated Sex Studies Thomas Roche
Taking Liberties Tracy Quan
Why Lying about Monogamy Matters Susie Bright
Losing the Meatpacking District: A Queer History of Leather Culture Abby Tallmer
Penis Gagging, BDSM, and Rape Fantasy: The Truth about Kinky Sexting Rachel Kramer Bussel
Adrian's Penis: Care and Handling Adrian Colesberry
The Continuing Criminalization of Teen Sex Ellen Friedrichs
Love Grenade Lidia Yuknavitch
Pottymouth Kevin Sampsell
Beyond the Headlines: Real Sex SecretsRachel Kramer Bussel
I think about sex a lot—every day, in fact. I don't mean that in an "I want to get it on" way, but in a "What are other people up to?" way. I'm a voyeur, first and foremost, and this extends to my writing. I'm naturally curious about what other people think about sex, from their intimate lives to how their sexuality translates to the larger world.
With the Best Sex Writing series, I get to merge my voyeuristic self with my journalism leanings, and peek into the lives, public and private, of those around me. This volume in the series doesn't pull any punches; the authors have strong opinions, whether it's Marty Klein sticking up for circumcision in the face of an effort in California to criminalize it, Roxane Gay taking the New York Times to task for its treatment of an 11-year-old rape victim, Thomas Roche calling out Newsweek for its shoddy reporting about prostitution, or Radley Balko examining a child pornography charge.
There are also more personal takes on sex here that go beyond facile headlines or easy answers, that aren't about making a point so much as exploring what real-life sex is like in all its beauty, drama, and messiness. Whether it's Amber Dawn and Tracy Quan sharing the truth about their lives as sex workers, or Hugo Schwyzer explaining the damage our culture does to men with its mythology about their innate sexual prowess, or Tim Elhajj's first-person account of pre–don't ask, don't tell military life, these authors show you a side of sex that you rarely see.
What you are about to read are stories, all true, some reported on the streets and some recorded from lived experience, from the front lines of sexuality. They deal with topics you read about in the headlines, and some topics you may never have considered. They are but a small sampling of the many kinds of sexual stories I received in the submission process.
Part of why I think sex never goes out of style, as a topic or activity, is that it is so very complex. There is no one way to do it, nor two, nor three. Sex can be mundane or mind-blowing, and for those who are trying to get from the former to the latter, there is a plethora of resources but also a host of misinformation purveyed by snake oil salesmen.
In Best Sex Writing 2012, you will read about subjects as diverse as "Guys Who Like Fat Chicks," the care an handling of a man's penis, and the glamour and glitter of the Latina drag world. Abby Tallmer, telling a story set in a very specific time and place—the gay leather clubs of New York's Meatpacking District in the 1990s—manages to capture why sexual community is so vital, and why, I'd venture, those who lack such a community wind up mired in sex scandals. Tallmer writes, "These clubs gave us a place to feel that we were no longer outsiders—or rather, they made us feel that it was better to be outsiders, together, than to force ourselves to be just like everybody else."
I'm especially pleased to present stories about the kinds of sexuality and sexual issues that don't always make the headlines, from Lynn Harris's investigation of dating with an STD to Hugo Schwyzer's moving look at men's need to be sexually desired and what happens when boys and men are told that that wanting to be desired is wrong. Joan Price gives some insight into elder sexuality, as well as into what it's like to purchase the services of a sexual healer. The topic of elder sex is often treated with horror or disgust, or the focus is placed on concern over STDs—which is a worthy topic this series has explored before. But Price, author of two books on elder sexuality (her piece here is excerpted from Naked At Our Age), obliges the reader to see the humanity behind her age. She writes, "My birthday erotic massage from a gentle stranger changed something in me. It showed me that I was still a responsive, fully sexual woman, getting ready to emerge from the cocoon of mourning into reexperiencing life. I realized that one big reason I ended up on Sunyata's massage table was so that I could get ready to reenter the world."
Not all, or even most, of the reading here is "easy." Much of it is challenging and heartbreaking. Roxane Gay's media criticism centers on a New York Times story about a Texas gang rape and why "The Careless Language of Sexual Violence" distorts our understanding about rape. You may think such a piece doesn't belong in an anthology with this title, but until we rid our world of sexual violence so that everyone can freely express themselves sexually, we need to hear searing indictments of media or those in power who ignore injustice.
As an editor, I'm not only looking for pieces that I agree with, or identify with, but for work that illuminates something new about a topic that's been around forever. The authors here dig deep, challenging both mainstream ideas about sex and a few sex-positive sacred cows. Ellen Friedrichs sticks up for the right of teenagers to be sexual without throwing parents, school boards, and other adults into a sex panic. Amanda Marcotte explores the fast-moving SlutWalk protest phenomenon, which has garnered criticisms from various sides, from being futile to only appealing to white women.
I will quote Abby Tallmer again, because I don't hear the words "sexual liberation" often enough these days. What moves me most about her piece is that you don't have to be a New Yorker, queer, leather, or kinky to understand what she's talking about. I'm 100 percent with her when she writes, "Back then, many of us believed that gay liberation was rooted in sexual liberation, and we believed that liberation was rooted in the right—no, the need—to claim ownership of our bodies, to experience and celebrate sexuality in as many forms as possible, limited only by our time and imagination." I hope this applies in 2012 just as much as it did in the 1970s, 80s, or 90s.
The truth is, I could have filled a book twice this size. Every day, stories are breaking, and being told, about sex—some wondrous, some heartbreaking. This is not a one-handed read, but it is a book that will stimulate your largest sex organ: your brain. Whether you live and breathe sex, you are curious about sex, or somewhere in between, I hope Best Sex Writing 2012 informs, incites, and inspires you. I hope it inspires you to write and tell your own sexual story, because I believe the more we talk about the many ways sex moves us, the more we work toward a world where sexual shame, ignorance, homophobia, and violence are diminished.
I'd love to hear your thoughts about this book and what you think are the hot topics around sex. Feel free to email me at rachel at bestsexwriting.com with your comments and suggestions for next year's anthology.
Rachel Kramer BusselNew YorkNovember 2011
