Steven Harper's Blog, page 67
May 10, 2018
Rockin' the School
I avoid mentioning the name of the school and district where I teach, but this time I can't. Check this out. It was just published today:
https://www.usnews.com/…/walled-lake-northern-high-school-1…
Walled Lake Northern was awarded a silver medal in US News and World Report's ranking of US schools.
Northern rated #22 of all schools in Michigan and #883 in the nation. (!!)
This may not sound impressive at first glance (everyone focuses so much on #1). However, Michigan has 1,572 public and private high schools. This puts Northern in the top 1.5%. USN ranked about 20,500 public and private high schools. This puts Northern in the top 4.5%.
Add in the fact that Newsweek included magnate and international baccalaureate schools in their examination, and the results are even more impressive.
I take full credit. No, seriously--this happened because of the teachers. I've learned that when you're in teaching, you get blamed when things go wrong, and expect the students to get the credit when things go right. I'm not doing that. This is because of the teachers--and don't forget it.
Go us!
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May 1, 2018
Hummers! Come and Get It!
As part of the Beltaine prep, Max and I put up the hummingbird feeders. I boiled syrup for them last night, so it was cool this morning. We cleaned out the feeders, filled them with ruby-red syrup, and hung them outside. Time to eat!
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Beltaine, 2018
It's Beltaine! May Day! Summer is here! (For us Pagans, summer starts in May, and Litha--Solstice--is mid-summer. Makes rather more sense than saying summer starts in late June!)
Today Max and I took school/work off. We slept in a little, then started the day with pancakes and sausage, our favorite breakfast. Generous bowls of chocolates and other treats were sitting on the sideboard--Beltaine is a decadence holiday, among other things.
After that, we set the house for summer. This involved blowing debris from the deck and porch and the outdoor altar, and hosing everything off. We also set up the deck furniture. Then we remulched the altar area and brought out the materials--the big Goddess statues, the metal stag, the Green Man sundial, the stone from Ireland, the conch shell, and a mess of candles. We set it all up in a trice and were ready to go!
The weather, by the way, is perfect. 70s and heading for the 80s, slight breeze, beautiful sunny sky. (Last year was rainy and cold.) It was fantastic to be outside in it!
Later, toward sunset, we'll barbecue some burgers and hold a ritual at the newly redone altar. Joyous Beltaine!
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Today Max and I took school/work off. We slept in a little, then started the day with pancakes and sausage, our favorite breakfast. Generous bowls of chocolates and other treats were sitting on the sideboard--Beltaine is a decadence holiday, among other things.
After that, we set the house for summer. This involved blowing debris from the deck and porch and the outdoor altar, and hosing everything off. We also set up the deck furniture. Then we remulched the altar area and brought out the materials--the big Goddess statues, the metal stag, the Green Man sundial, the stone from Ireland, the conch shell, and a mess of candles. We set it all up in a trice and were ready to go!
The weather, by the way, is perfect. 70s and heading for the 80s, slight breeze, beautiful sunny sky. (Last year was rainy and cold.) It was fantastic to be outside in it!
Later, toward sunset, we'll barbecue some burgers and hold a ritual at the newly redone altar. Joyous Beltaine!
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April 24, 2018
To Infinity!
I have my tickets for Infinity War. I love being able to reserve a ticket and a seat in advance so that I can sit where I want without having to arrive an hour before the movie starts!
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Rephrasing It
I've discovered that I get more respectful reactions from people when I don't tell them I'm a teacher. Instead, I tell them I'm a manager who conducts at least five meetings per day, each with over 30 employees, and give my employees personalized feedback on their ongoing projects and oversee the design of new projects intended to further the goals of our system.
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April 16, 2018
Jury Duty, Sexual Assault, and Me
This morning was Jury Duty Day. I drove to the courthouse and went through the annoying security system that requires you to get half undressed.
A small aside: Michigan courthouses don't allow cell phones on the grounds that it's too easy to use them for unauthorized photography. The last time I went to the courthouse was to change my married name, and I didn't want to stand in a long line at the county clerk's office without my phone. So I went through the security with it in my jacket pocket, though first I had to empty my pants pockets and take off my belt and my shoes. As I knew it would, the phone set off the metal detector and the guard found my phone. He handed it to me and told me I'd have to take it back to my car. I agreed to this, but pointed out I'd have to get re-dressed first. I stepped over to a little table to put myself back together, and in seconds the guard was already distracted by more people crowding to get through the security check station. He forgot all about me. I slipped my phone back into my pocket and sauntered downstairs to the clerk's office to change my name. There!
I considered doing that today, but wasn't sure I could pull the same trick twice. In the end, I left my phone in the car. Since I had my laptop, I'd be able to entertain myself and communicate with the outside world easily enough. When I put my laptop case through the x-ray machine, the guard halted it and asked, "Do you have a cell phone in this case?" I was a little startled. You mean the machine couldn't tell? "Nope," I said, and mentally kicked myself. Next time I'll know--put the cell phone into the computer briefcase.
Anyway, I got to the jury room without further incident.
A crap-ton of people were called in for it duty today because the courts had a lot of trials. I found a study carol, unpacked my computer, booted it up, found the complimentary wi-fi, and was just starting in on a new short story when I was called into a trial. Sigh. I shut down, disconnected, packed up, and went upstairs with 49 other people and a shockingly handsome court clerk. Although it was four flights up to the courtroom, almost no one took the elevator, which I found odd. This is America! Who takes the stairs? I sure didn't, not with my coat, briefcase, and laptop!
Upstairs, a huge mass of us jurors filled the courtroom. Clearly, they were figuring on a lot of dismissals. They selected 13 people--not me--to be the initial jurors, and the voire dire began.
In this case, a man was accused of sexual assault. The trial was expected to last two days, which is court code for "probably a week." The judge read off a looooooooooooong list of admonitions, asked each juror some basic questions, and turned questioning over to the lawyers.
One woman everyone hated. She kept saying, "I have very strong opinions about the subject of this trial and about the evidence in the case." The judge pointed three times that out no evidence had been presented yet and that the defendant was still considered an innocent man. But the woman persevered that she had "strong opinions about the evidence." She used that phrase several times, growing more and more forceful. Everyone in the room was getting pissed at her. Finally, the judge said, "It's clear you shouldn't sit on this case. You can leave." The woman grabbed up her purse and marched out. The judge turned to the room and said that anyone who thought they could make outrageous statements to avoid sitting on this trial had better think again.
And guess who was called up to take her seat? Yep--me.
By now, I already knew I wasn't going to be sitting on this jury, but the court didn't know it yet. Unfortunately, there was only one way to deal with this.
"Have you heard the questions we asked the other jurors?" the judge asked me.
"Yes," I said.
"Are there any of them that would have a bearing on this case for you?"
"Yes."
The judge nodded. "What would that be?"
"I'm twice a survivor of sexual assault."
Brief pause. "Do you think it would be inappropriate for you to sit on the jury for this trial?" the judge asked.
"Yes," I said.
"Then you're dismissed."
As I filed past the other jurors, who were trying not to stare, the judge added, "Thank you for your candor."
I gathered up my things and left. My heart was beating faster than I would have liked.
One interesting fact I learned from the judge, though: Michigan law states that in cases of sexual assault, the victim's testimony is considered evidence strong enough to convict without reasonable doubt. There's no need for DNA evidence, other witnesses, or anything else.
Out in the hall, I pretended I was one of my students on a bathroom pass and wandered around the courthouse to clear my head. When I figured I'd stretched things out as long as I safely could, I went back to the jury room. On the way, I passed two more groups of jurors heading to courtrooms, so I'm glad I didn't hurry.
Back in the jury room, I got my computer out again and went back to work on my short story. Time passed. We unassigned jurors sat around getting hungrier and hungrier. By now it was well past lunch. They had vending machines, but I didn't want to buy something, only to be told a minute later I could go to lunch. Other rejected jurors trickled into the room looking either stunned or relieved, depending.
Finally the coordinator announced that they were still waiting on the needs of one particular trial, but a bunch of people could go to lunch right now. She read off a list of names that didn't include me. So I had to wait. They don't tell you much of anything at these things, and those of us who remained were getting grouchier and grouchier. I kept writing.
One more time the coordinator got on the loudspeaker and announced that the trial in question wouldn't be seating a jury today. "That means you can all go home. Your service is complete."
Well, then! I gathered up my collection of electronics and went home. Though I do wonder if the people who were sent to lunch ended up being put on a jury when they got back!
And that concluded my jury service.
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A small aside: Michigan courthouses don't allow cell phones on the grounds that it's too easy to use them for unauthorized photography. The last time I went to the courthouse was to change my married name, and I didn't want to stand in a long line at the county clerk's office without my phone. So I went through the security with it in my jacket pocket, though first I had to empty my pants pockets and take off my belt and my shoes. As I knew it would, the phone set off the metal detector and the guard found my phone. He handed it to me and told me I'd have to take it back to my car. I agreed to this, but pointed out I'd have to get re-dressed first. I stepped over to a little table to put myself back together, and in seconds the guard was already distracted by more people crowding to get through the security check station. He forgot all about me. I slipped my phone back into my pocket and sauntered downstairs to the clerk's office to change my name. There!
I considered doing that today, but wasn't sure I could pull the same trick twice. In the end, I left my phone in the car. Since I had my laptop, I'd be able to entertain myself and communicate with the outside world easily enough. When I put my laptop case through the x-ray machine, the guard halted it and asked, "Do you have a cell phone in this case?" I was a little startled. You mean the machine couldn't tell? "Nope," I said, and mentally kicked myself. Next time I'll know--put the cell phone into the computer briefcase.
Anyway, I got to the jury room without further incident.
A crap-ton of people were called in for it duty today because the courts had a lot of trials. I found a study carol, unpacked my computer, booted it up, found the complimentary wi-fi, and was just starting in on a new short story when I was called into a trial. Sigh. I shut down, disconnected, packed up, and went upstairs with 49 other people and a shockingly handsome court clerk. Although it was four flights up to the courtroom, almost no one took the elevator, which I found odd. This is America! Who takes the stairs? I sure didn't, not with my coat, briefcase, and laptop!
Upstairs, a huge mass of us jurors filled the courtroom. Clearly, they were figuring on a lot of dismissals. They selected 13 people--not me--to be the initial jurors, and the voire dire began.
In this case, a man was accused of sexual assault. The trial was expected to last two days, which is court code for "probably a week." The judge read off a looooooooooooong list of admonitions, asked each juror some basic questions, and turned questioning over to the lawyers.
One woman everyone hated. She kept saying, "I have very strong opinions about the subject of this trial and about the evidence in the case." The judge pointed three times that out no evidence had been presented yet and that the defendant was still considered an innocent man. But the woman persevered that she had "strong opinions about the evidence." She used that phrase several times, growing more and more forceful. Everyone in the room was getting pissed at her. Finally, the judge said, "It's clear you shouldn't sit on this case. You can leave." The woman grabbed up her purse and marched out. The judge turned to the room and said that anyone who thought they could make outrageous statements to avoid sitting on this trial had better think again.
And guess who was called up to take her seat? Yep--me.
By now, I already knew I wasn't going to be sitting on this jury, but the court didn't know it yet. Unfortunately, there was only one way to deal with this.
"Have you heard the questions we asked the other jurors?" the judge asked me.
"Yes," I said.
"Are there any of them that would have a bearing on this case for you?"
"Yes."
The judge nodded. "What would that be?"
"I'm twice a survivor of sexual assault."
Brief pause. "Do you think it would be inappropriate for you to sit on the jury for this trial?" the judge asked.
"Yes," I said.
"Then you're dismissed."
As I filed past the other jurors, who were trying not to stare, the judge added, "Thank you for your candor."
I gathered up my things and left. My heart was beating faster than I would have liked.
One interesting fact I learned from the judge, though: Michigan law states that in cases of sexual assault, the victim's testimony is considered evidence strong enough to convict without reasonable doubt. There's no need for DNA evidence, other witnesses, or anything else.
Out in the hall, I pretended I was one of my students on a bathroom pass and wandered around the courthouse to clear my head. When I figured I'd stretched things out as long as I safely could, I went back to the jury room. On the way, I passed two more groups of jurors heading to courtrooms, so I'm glad I didn't hurry.
Back in the jury room, I got my computer out again and went back to work on my short story. Time passed. We unassigned jurors sat around getting hungrier and hungrier. By now it was well past lunch. They had vending machines, but I didn't want to buy something, only to be told a minute later I could go to lunch. Other rejected jurors trickled into the room looking either stunned or relieved, depending.
Finally the coordinator announced that they were still waiting on the needs of one particular trial, but a bunch of people could go to lunch right now. She read off a list of names that didn't include me. So I had to wait. They don't tell you much of anything at these things, and those of us who remained were getting grouchier and grouchier. I kept writing.
One more time the coordinator got on the loudspeaker and announced that the trial in question wouldn't be seating a jury today. "That means you can all go home. Your service is complete."
Well, then! I gathered up my collection of electronics and went home. Though I do wonder if the people who were sent to lunch ended up being put on a jury when they got back!
And that concluded my jury service.
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April 15, 2018
Rockin' the Chicken
The Great Vegetarian Expotition has ended. Darwin and Max, despite earlier enthusiasm for it, kept resisting it or circumventing it (usually by ordering meat at restaurants), and it became a bigger and bigger chore to find food that they would eat without complaining. It was also a major hassle learning to cook in new ways several times a week, especially when I got no help, not even, "Hey, why don't we try this?", from the local residents. It all became more trouble than it was worth, so we ended it.
And today I roasted a chicken.
When I started off, though, I realized I hadn't given this full thought. I'd forgotten to buy anything to stuff or season it with, for one thing. Working with a big piece of meat had also become a little foreign. But the skills came back with some nudging. I decided to stuff the chicken with onions, rosemary, and crushed garlic cloves. I also rubbed a crushed clove all over the skin, then oiled it and salted it. The whole thing when into a dish atop a bed of rough-chopped onions and carrots, and then into the oven. Accompanying dishes were mashed potatoes and cucumber salad.
The chicken came out deliciously! The onions kept the meat moist and tender, and the garlic was strong enough to flavor the meat without overwhelming it. Delightful! Now the bones are simmering for soup stock.
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And today I roasted a chicken.
When I started off, though, I realized I hadn't given this full thought. I'd forgotten to buy anything to stuff or season it with, for one thing. Working with a big piece of meat had also become a little foreign. But the skills came back with some nudging. I decided to stuff the chicken with onions, rosemary, and crushed garlic cloves. I also rubbed a crushed clove all over the skin, then oiled it and salted it. The whole thing when into a dish atop a bed of rough-chopped onions and carrots, and then into the oven. Accompanying dishes were mashed potatoes and cucumber salad.
The chicken came out deliciously! The onions kept the meat moist and tender, and the garlic was strong enough to flavor the meat without overwhelming it. Delightful! Now the bones are simmering for soup stock.
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Jury Duty
I have jury duty on Monday. This is the third time I've been called. The first time, I was put into the jury pool for a trial that was expected to last two weeks. A woman had been watching her sister's husband beating the sister, so the woman blew him away with a shotgun. The question at the trial was whether or not this qualified as defense of self or another. I was quickly disqualified from the pool because my family has a history of domestic abuse, which the judge feared might prejudice me. The trial ultimately lasted SIX weeks, and the woman went to prison. (I think she should have gone free.)
The second time, I sat around until noon, when they told me to go home.
Now's the third time. I know the system is supposed to be random, but it definitely feels unfair when I'm called up three times and I have a ton of friends and family, including Darwin, who say they've =never= been called.
I don't like jury duty. Although I don't lose salary--the school continues to pay me--I do end up with a pile of extra work. I have to make long-term lesson plans that even a monkey can teach, and when I get back, I have to grade an extra-large pile of papers. A smaller complaint is that my life is structured around working 7-3, and suddenly working 9-5 is a major disruption of my life. So I greatly dislike jury duty.
I'm not alone. A lot of people hate jury duty, and this hatred could be mitigated with a number of fixes.
1. Selection should not be completely random. Once you've been called, your name should go to the bottom of the selection barrel so that people who haven't served yet will be selected before you're called up again.
2. It should be law that anyone who is called to jury duty must be paid their usual salary or wage by their employer. Right now, it's purely the employer's decision, and (as you may imagine) companies such as WalMart and McDonald's don't pay employees who have jury duty. This creates serious economic harm for a lot of people, and courts are only semi-sympathetic to people who plead poverty.
3. The court should provide free day care to jurors who need it. Nursing mothers can already be excused from duty, but there's no exemption for stay-at-home parents.
This would make jury duty much easier and more palatable to the public, and it would result in fewer people begging off or inventing excuses to get out of it.
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The second time, I sat around until noon, when they told me to go home.
Now's the third time. I know the system is supposed to be random, but it definitely feels unfair when I'm called up three times and I have a ton of friends and family, including Darwin, who say they've =never= been called.
I don't like jury duty. Although I don't lose salary--the school continues to pay me--I do end up with a pile of extra work. I have to make long-term lesson plans that even a monkey can teach, and when I get back, I have to grade an extra-large pile of papers. A smaller complaint is that my life is structured around working 7-3, and suddenly working 9-5 is a major disruption of my life. So I greatly dislike jury duty.
I'm not alone. A lot of people hate jury duty, and this hatred could be mitigated with a number of fixes.
1. Selection should not be completely random. Once you've been called, your name should go to the bottom of the selection barrel so that people who haven't served yet will be selected before you're called up again.
2. It should be law that anyone who is called to jury duty must be paid their usual salary or wage by their employer. Right now, it's purely the employer's decision, and (as you may imagine) companies such as WalMart and McDonald's don't pay employees who have jury duty. This creates serious economic harm for a lot of people, and courts are only semi-sympathetic to people who plead poverty.
3. The court should provide free day care to jurors who need it. Nursing mothers can already be excused from duty, but there's no exemption for stay-at-home parents.
This would make jury duty much easier and more palatable to the public, and it would result in fewer people begging off or inventing excuses to get out of it.
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April 7, 2018
Darwn Clementines
Because Darwin has a favorite snack:
DARWIN'S CLEMENTINES
I sang it to him, and now he's humming it as he wanders about the house, trailing little orange peels behind him.
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DARWIN'S CLEMENTINES
In a township, in a suburb
Where he loved to spend his time,
Ypsilanti was his plan, he
He loved his luscious clementines.
CHORUS
Oh my Darwin, oh my Darwin
Oh my Darwin's clementines,
You are noshed and gone forever.
Dreadful sorry, clementines.
Light he was and like a fairy
(Not like those you have in mind),
He collected and erected
Giant piles of clementines.
Dropped them down into the juicer
(It was Model 99).
Extra pulpy, how he noshed the
Luscious orange clementines.
Drove he daily to the office
Ev'ry morning just at nine
Hit a splinter by the river
And he dropped his clementines.
Orange skins bobbed in the water
Blowing bubbles, soft and fine
But the swim, see, was too grim, he
Lost his luscious clementines.
How he missed them! How he missed them!
How he missed his clementines
But a small green nectarine be-
Came his brand new clementine.
Oh my Darwin, oh my Darwin
Oh my Darwin's clementines,
You are noshed and gone forever.
Dreadful sorry, clementines!
I sang it to him, and now he's humming it as he wanders about the house, trailing little orange peels behind him.
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April 5, 2018
WIP and Yay!
Despite the difficulties, I finally finished the first draft of my latest novel, tentatively titled RESURRECTION MEN. 118,000 carefully-chosen words. Go me!
I'm going to let it sit for a couple weeks and then start the rewrites. I want this book done by May!
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I'm going to let it sit for a couple weeks and then start the rewrites. I want this book done by May!
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