J.D. Rhoades's Blog, page 43

Review: BECOMING QUINN, by Brett Battles

Becoming Quinn - A Jonathan Quinn Novella by Brett Battles

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


One of the coolest things about the e-book revolution is that it's provided more openings for the shorter literary forms, like the short story and the novella. I've always enjoyed the novella form. It's a quick read, but there's more time to develop character and more chances to crank up the suspense than you can usually found in the short story.

Becoming Quinn is the novella done right. It's short, tightly written, full of action, but at the same time it gives you the opportunity to really get to know and to care about the main character as he makes his journey from idealistic cop Jake Oliver to become the hard-edged "cleaner" Jonathan Quinn.

Brett Battles also has the one indispensable gift for a thriller writer: he makes events that you would normally find absurd seem not only possible, but inevitable.

This book's a lot of fun. Check it out.



View all my reviews

Default Will Destroy the Economy? Dude, That's What They WANT.

Latest Newspaper Column:

One of the more famous quotes of the Vietnam War era came out of a press conference when reporters questioned a U.S. Army major about the decision to use air strikes and artillery against a little town called Ben Tre, which was full of civilians as well as Viet Cong.

The hapless major eventually blurted out, "We had to destroy Ben Tre in order to save it."

The quote was widely regarded as the perfect example of the lunacy of that war. But now, it seems that a group of Republican radicals is taking "we have to destroy it in order to save it" as their mantra. Except this time, it's not an obscure hamlet in Southeast Asia that's about to get flattened; it's the American economy.

Think I'm exaggerating? Last week, South Carolina GOP Sen. Jim DeMint, discussing the recent debate on raising the debt ceiling, told Fox Business network that he was willing to accept "serious disruptions" in the U.S. economy to get what he and other conservatives want: tax breaks for the wealthy, cuts for the rest of us.

When CNBC host Carl Quintanilla asked Michele Bachmann, "Does it strike you that as the unemployment rate goes up, your chances of winning office also go up?" Bachmann replied with uncustomary honesty: "Well, that could be. Again, I hope so."

A few days later, according to an article in The Washington Post, "hundreds of senior company executives and groups including the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and the Business Roundtable" sent a joint letter to the president and every member of Congress, urging them not to let the country default on its debt.

"A great nation — like a great company — has to be relied upon to pay its debts when they become due," the letter read. "Treasury securities influence the cost of financing not just for companies but more importantly for mortgages, auto loans, credit cards and student debt. A default would risk both disarray in those markets and a host of unintended consequences."

The letter did not, it should be noted, ask for any increase in the debt ceiling to be linked to tax or spending cuts.

Sen. Mitch McConnell also advised his party not to allow such a default. Not because such a thing would be a catastrophe for the economy, but because it would be politically bad for the Republicans.

"I refuse to help Barack Obama get re-elected by marching Republicans into a position where we have co-ownership of a bad economy," McConnell told right-wing talk show host Laura Ingraham. "If we go into default, he will say Republicans are making the economy worse. … That is a very bad position going into an election."

It's not a bad economy that bothers McConnell, you see. He and his rich buddies will be doing fine whatever happens. But the possibility that it might affect their election chances — that really makes him sweat.

So, in a crass display of pure politics, McConnell proposed a plan that wouldn't require tax or spending cuts. What it amounted to, basically, was, "We'll let Obama raise the debt ceiling with a stroke of his pen while we shake our fingers at him disapprovingly, then run off to make attack ads about it." It was a nakedly cynical ploy, but at least it would keep us from defaulting.

Nope, said House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, current figurehead of the radicals in the House. "Currently, there is not a single debt limit proposal that can pass the House of Representatives," Cantor said in a statement Wednesday. This, after President Obama made such sweeping offers of cuts, including cuts in entitlements that had previously been regarded as taboo, that his own party was screaming blue murder.

The offer would, in the words of conservative columnist David Brooks, create "trillions of dollars in spending cuts in exchange for a few hundred billion dollars of revenue increases." Brooks called accepting the proposals "the mother of all no-brainers." Not only have the House Republicans said no, but they've also lied and claimed that the president hasn't even proposed a plan at all.

So it's clear that default, and the "serious disruptions" that will come with it, are what nihilists like Bachmann, Cantor and DeMint want. Unlike McConnell, they're gambling that a wrecked economy will reap electoral benefits for them in 2012. They truly are ready to destroy the village in order to "save it."

Problem is, that village is where we live, and you and I aren't the ones they're talking about saving. We're going to be the collateral damage.

Review: THE PARADISE PROPHECY by Robert Browne

The Paradise Prophecy by Robert Browne

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


A tough and savvy female intelligence operative teams up with a brilliant but burned-out academic to investigate the unexplained fiery death of an international pop star. They discover a plot by a crew of fallen angels who are scheming to open the gates of Hell itself and bring on the end of the world. The key to mankind's survival lies in the seven missing pages of a book known as the Devil's Bible--and in a mysterious entity known as the Telum.

In lesser hands, this could have been a really silly book. But Rob Browne keeps the story moving at a rip-roaring pace as his protagonists chase the mystery around the globe and beyond, up to a final climax that goes about as big as you can imagine.

There is, by the way, a rather interesting cosmology here. It's not quite what you may have learned in Sunday school, but I have to admit, it fits the available data.

This is one of those books that hooks you and pulls you along with it right to the end. Think The DaVinci Code, except with good writing and characters who act and talk like actual people. I highly recommend it.

View all my reviews

Casey Anthony Outrage, Part II: Now They Tell Us

 From what's sure to be only one of hundreds of "how did this happen" articles...


The government failed to establish how 2-year-old Caylee Anthony died and they couldn't find her mother's DNA on the duct tape they said was used to suffocate her. There was conflicting testimony on whether the putrid smell inside the family's car was a decomposing body or simply trash, and it was never quite clear why chloroform was so important.

Now, as I said below, I haven't been following the coverage of the trial...but were any of the media pointing this out before the verdict? Because that stuff seems pretty important, especially not being able to establish cause of death. I'd venture to say there's no way to get a murder verdict without that.

Like I said before...if they were so anxious to spin the "guilty, guilty, guilty" narrative that they didn't report that, then maybe it's the reporters you should be mad at for not doing their damn jobs (not to mention the prosecutors who tried a weak case they should have pled).

Oh, well. On to the next outrage. 

Why I'm Not Outraged at the Casey Anthony Verdict

When you're an attorney, especially if you do criminal law, people are always asking you: "what do you think of the [insert name of latest high profile defendant here] trial?" It's been especially intense for some reason during this latest blockbuster trial, that of Casey Anthony, who was charged with killing her daughter Caylee. The question is often followed up with "you can't possibly think she's innocent, can you?"


 My answer, as always, is: I have no idea. I haven't heard any of the evidence.  I've seen trials, then seen coverage of those same trials.   And I know for sure that, if your only knowledge of the case is what you've seen on TV or read in the paper, you haven't heard all the evidence. It's impossible. Trials go on for days, sometimes weeks, and what you see in the mass media is a thirty second, at most, glimpse of what went on. Unfortunately, those tidbits you're fed are  picked by someone who's looking, not for the most important facts, but for the most dramatic or sensational ones. 


The media are not interested in justice; they're interested in eyeballs on the page or screen. For that reason, frankly, they often do  a piss-poor job of  covering criminal trials. Reporters  make up their minds early on, construct a narrative around their preconceptions, and the decision on what to tell you is invariably bent around that narrative. And they've all apparently decided that "guilty! guilty!  guilty!" is the narrative most likely to sell, unless a case falls so completely to pieces and starts to stink so bad  they can't ignore the stench  any longer. 


 I'm not just talking about Nancy Grace, who's only the most egregious example. Court coverage in general is abysmal, and I haven't seen any yet that even bothers to give lip service to the concept of "innocent until proven guilty." 


 This is why I never follow the latest "trial of the century." I know I'm not getting all the information I need to make a decision. I'm getting only those parts of the story that some reporter thinks will get tongues wagging around the water cooler the next day so you'll come back that evening and watch some more.  


The only people who heard all the facts in that case are the people in that courtroom. What they found important may have been light-years removed from what some reporter or paid "legal expert" on the news found important  enough to tell you. So none of us are in a position to be screaming that the jurors were stupid or that justice was not done. That's why I'm not outraged that Casey Anthony was acquitted, because I can't decide on whether she killed her daughter or not based on what's on TV. 

Review: THE MIDNIGHT ROAD, by Tom Piccirilli

The Midnight Road by Tom Piccirilli

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


During an investigation of a child abuse complaint, Social Worker Flynn finds a scarred, mentally disabled man kept in a cage in the basement. In the ensuing attempt to get the man and the child away, Flynn wrecks his car, dies, and is brought back to life. Now, a dead bulldog is following him around talking to him and people are being killed in front of him for no reason he can see.

I really loved Tom Piccirilli's The Cold Spot, but I just couldn't get into this one. Maybe it's because I know too many actual social workers to really believe in a gun-toting, brawling Child Protective Services worker like Flynn. In any real CPS organization, he'd have been out on his ass years ago. (I have the same problem, BTW, with most "legal thrillers"--my ability to suspend disbelief only goes so far). So maybe the problem is me.

On the up side, while the revelation of who the mysterious antagonist is shouldn't be any real surprise to anyone paying a bit of attention, once he's out in the open, he's one of the scariest and downright creepiest villains I've ever read.

So, the book has its points. But I'd recommend reading The Cold Spot instead.


View all my reviews

Your Annual Summer Vacation Guide

Latest Newspaper Column:

Another summer is upon us with a vengeance, complete with the eyeball-melting heat and humidity we Southerners all know and love.

On the bright side, summertime is vacation time. And vacation time means time once again for our annual compendium of wild, wonderful and wacky tourist attractions.

For the tourist who's always had a fascination with James Bond or Jason Bourne, there's the International Spy Museum, located in Washington, D.C. There are exhibits on espionage throughout history, including displays of real spy gear and lectures about true-to-life spies.

At least they claim to be true. You never know. If they're into complete realism, they'll be lying to you. For a couple of hundred bucks, you can even sign the kids up for the museum's "Spy in Training" program, which includes, among other things, a two-week summer camp in which the budding spooks learn about "fingerprinting, handwriting analysis and cryptography," while "meeting real former spies and running missions in some of the city's most prominent attractions."

Of course, if the kids are nabbed by Homeland Security, the museum will deny all knowledge of their actions. That's how the game's played.

I was astounded to learn that the great state of Connecticut has not one, but two museums devoted to garbage.

The Connecticut Resources Recovery Authority runs two "award-winning" museums, one in Hartford and one in Stratford, with "unique exhibits and programs on the many challenges and solutions of waste management." Additionally, "each museum has a viewing area where visitors can observe the working regional recycling center." Wheeeee!

As if that weren't spine-tingling enough, the site in Stratford features "Trashasaurus," a giant dinosaur figure made of exactly one ton of refuse, supposedly about the amount each person throws away every year.

I guarantee you, if you take the kids to this attraction, they'll talk about it for years. I can't guarantee they'll talk about it with anything other than complete outrage and disbelief that you dragged them to a trash pile in the middle of summer, but they'll surely talk about it. You better hurry, though; due to budget cuts, the museums may have to close their doors, and Trashasaurus will be as extinct as his non-rubbishy brethren.

As I've mentioned in earlier columns, I fear robots. So I was reluctant at first to recommend RoboWorld, an exhibit at Pittsburgh's Carnegie Museum that advertises itself as "an exhibition so exciting it'll fry your motherboard."

But when I read the description of how kids can shoot basket against Hoops, "a basketball-shooting industrial arm," play air hockey against a robot, discover how robots can read facial expressions, and "explore the future of robots in this one-of-a-kind robotics experience," I realized that this is the perfect opportunity.

Our children do need to learn these things, because they will most likely be the ones fighting those soulless mechanical demons for possession of the planet. Know your enemy and all that. Just be sure to sit the kids down afterward and explain to them that while Andy, the robot guide at the exhibit, may look friendly and cuddly, someday he and billions just like him will attempt to exterminate them and everyone they love. They'll thank you for it later.

"But Dusty," you say. "All of this cultural and educational stuff is fine, but what about what we really want to hear from you? No, not your rendition of 'Free Bird.' What about your guide to the nation's freakishly large objects?"

Fear not, dear friends. Hear now the story of the 20 Foot Rabbit of Gainesville, Georgia.

In the latter half of the 20th century, Gainesville began billing itself as "Poultry Capital of the World." They even erected a pillar to commemorate it, sort of like Nelson's column in London, if Admiral Nelson had been a barnyard fowl.

This didn't sit too well with the town's older residents, who recalled that the place used to be known as "Rabbittown," due to a number of ranches in the area where farmers raised herds of the critters for food. (The din at branding time must have been horrific). Thus, they erected a 20-foot rabbit statue, with, according to Roadsideamerica.com, "the soft lines and awkward alert pose of a chocolate Easter bunny."

But don't try to take a bite out of it. It appears to be made of concrete.

Wherever you go this summer, I wish you cool breezes and safe travels.

New Covers!

Jeroen ten Berge has done it again! Check out the cool new covers for the Kindle editions of  Good Day In Hell and Safe and Sound: 

Letters, Oh I Get Letters

Today in The Pilot:

Dusty Rhoades' petulant column attacking Michele Bachmann and Mitt Romney (June 19) displays a prepubescent proclivity (for name-calling), when rational, cogent analysis would be the most powerful way to pose one's argument.Indeed, character assassination is the last refuge of a mind sadly bereft of ideas.Dixie ChapmanPinehurstI always love the people who write in, excoriating a satirical column for not being serious enough. Hey, Dixie, I do cogent analysis and argument, but for a hell of a lot more money that The Pilot pays me. For these prices, snark and mockery are what you get. In conclusion, let us remember the immortal words of Sgt. Hulka:

I'm Really Going to Miss Christopher Hitchens

Christopher Hitchens reviews David Mamet's new book The Secret Knowledge at NYTimes.com and he's in rare form.

One of the things that's been so dismaying about Mamet's recent screeds is not that he's embraced conservatism, but that he seems to have taken up the most angry, bitter, condescending, and intellectually dishonest form of it. As Hitchens puts it:

By now, perhaps, you will not be surprised to know that Mamet regards global warming as a false alarm, and demands to be told "by what magical process" bumper stickers can "save whales, and free Tibet." This again is not uncharacteristic of his pointlessly aggressive style: who on earth maintains that they can? If I were as prone to sloganizing as Mamet, I'd keep clear of bumper-sticker comparisons altogether.


Wham. 
Hitchens, as is his wont, acknowledges his own exasperation with what he calls "the pieties of the left," but he also has little patience with "Mamet's commitment to the one-dimensional or the flat-out partisan."  He also touches upon  my other reason for dismay at what Mamet's been up to lately: the man who's penned so many great words of his own seems content now to parrot the work of far inferior wordsmiths like Glenn Beck. 

The whole thing is worth a read. I may not always agree with Hitchens, but I'm convinced reading him makes you smarter.