Jim Webster's Blog, page 53

Wearing your headscarf at work

‘Time is a construct of man, a means of adding value and structure to a chaotic universe, it serves no real purpose, it’s endless and infinite, unfathomable and subjective’ ‘You’re still bloody late’ replied my boss. Funny old world isn’t it. I saw an old film on Facebook, showing a lot of women leaving the …

Just helping out

I suppose one thing I regularly get is, ‘Jim, could you just give us a hand here.’ To be fair it’s normally somebody wanting a hand sorting sheep, or somebody to hold a tup while they trim its feet.  But occasionally it can be an editor, desperate to get something to fill a gap in …

Move along, nothing so see.

A few thoughts from writers. “A blank piece of paper is God’s way of telling us how hard it to be God.” - Sidney Sheldon “I have been successful probably because I have always realized that I knew nothing about writing and have merely tried to tell an interesting story entertainingly.” - Edgar Rice Burroughs …

An Interesting Week.

In 1605 Guy Fawkes, along with others, plotted to kill King James 1 by blowing up the House of Parliament (the Gunpowder Plot). Since then England has commemorated the event, on 5th November, with bonfires and fireworks. Occasionally, over the last few years, you will hear people ask “Where is Guy Fawkes when you really …

The rebirth of secular religion

You know what they say, what goes around comes around. Back in the good old days we had secular religion. Our Roman and Greek predecessors kept gods in their place. Priesthoods were just jobs handed out to the already powerful, to people of the ‘right sort’ who could be relied upon to maintain the status …

Not so much flies as plummets

Shepherd: Birds is the key to the whole problem. It’s my belief that these sheep are laborin’ under the misapprehension that they’re birds. Observe their behavior. Take for a start the sheeps’ tendency to ‘op about the field on their back legs. Now witness their attmpts to fly from tree to tree. Notice that they …

Missed opportunities.

An elderly lady decided to give herself a treat for her birthday by staying overnight in one of London’s posh hotels. When she checked out next morning the desk clerk handed her a bill for £350. She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so much – even without breakfast! The clerk told …

Thou shalt not muzzle the ox when he treadeth out the corn. And, the labourer is worthy of his hire.

There’s the tale of a lad who went for a job on a farm. The old farmer who interviewed him asked what he could do. The lad replied ‘Everything.’ ‘Can you milk cows?’ ‘Yes, no worries.’ ‘Can you plough?’ ‘As good a ploughman as you’ll find anywhere.’ ‘Can you clip sheep?’ ‘Won competitions for it.’ …

Getting out more.

I’ve been watching the reaction to the Clacton by-election. What started me thinking was a post on Facebook from someone who is otherwise a Labour party supporter. The message was ‘Tory Scumbags take a kicking.’ But one question I’d like to ask the Labour supporter is, “If people so dislike the Tory Scumbags, if the …

Funny old world

You know what they say, “The sooner you fall behind the more time you’ll have to catch up.” Hopefully today it’ll be right because I’ve spent most of it doing things that need doing but which weren’t even to be considered when I bounded cheerfully out of bed this morning. (Before you ask, yes I …