Kathi Lipp's Blog, page 47
June 6, 2018
Back to Basics: Clutter Free Book Club Launches June 18
It’s been three years since Clutter Free came out and took the clutter/organizing world by storm with its quick and easy steps to simplifying your space. When the book was written, we had no idea it would change the course of our ministry by changing thousands of lives. Yet here we are.
Today, that book has evolved into an entire community. Clutter Free Academy is a live workshop, ecourse, blog, podcast and Facebook group. In just a year, that Facebook group has grown to more than 5,000 members. Every day, people post pictures of their transformations. We see bedrooms go from junk rooms to sanctuaries, and we hear stories of how Clutter Free living has freed women from anxiety, lifted spirits and improved relationships.
It’s awe-inspiring, and more is yet to come.
This month, we’re launching the Clutter Free Book Club in our Facebook Group. Going from June 18 to July 13, this brief book club takes members through the book that started it all: Clutter Free. We’ll spend about an hour each Monday at 5 p.m. discussing segments of the book in the group on Facebook Live. The first session will be an orientation of sorts with the first reading assignment. After that, our group discussions will involve the assigned readings and how they apply to our daily lives.
This group is perfect for anyone who is new to Clutter Free and wants to learn the foundational principles upon which the Clutter Free Academy is built. It’s also great for the longtime Clutter Free fan who wants a refresher in the company of others to share similar challenges and successes.
To participate, all you need to do is be a member of the group and own a copy of the book. If you need the book, you can order via Amazon or you can purchase a signed copy from the Kathi Lipp store and receive a free bookmark with the three questions we use to determine whether stuff earns its space in our homes: Do I love it? Do I use it? Would I buy it again? The bookmark comes in handy when you need a reminder. You’ll need to order the book this week if you want to receive it before the book club begins.
Whether it’s your first time or your fifth, we look forward to taking this journey together to become Clutter Free in our homes, our hearts and our minds. Join the Facebook group today and introduce yourself. We can’t wait to meet you.
June 5, 2018
Episode #307- The Top 5 Ways to Declutter Your Car: Car Organization Ideas That Keep You Clutter Free and Give Your Ride that New Car Feel
Like the rest of us, you’re busy. You’re running kids to soccer, baseball, and ballet. Some days it feels like you’re living out of your car and well, it looks like it too. How can you declutter your car on the go? Is this even possible? Kathi and Tonya are here to give you car organization ideas and some very practical tips how to accomplish just that. Tune in now!
Click to download this handy at a glance checklist: 5 Ways to Declutter Your Car Download
Check out this awesome caddy I use in my car for all my items.
This is the car hook I use to keep my purse close by but out of the way.
Meet Our Guest
Tonya Kubo
Tonya Kubo is the illustrious, fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter-Free Academy Facebook group. She and her husband, Brian, are raising two spirited girls in the agricultural heart of California. She writes about fighting the demons of comparison, clutter and compulsion on www.tonyakubo.com.
Episode #307- The Top 5 Ways to Declutter Your Car:Car Organization Ideas That Keep You Clutter Free and Give Your Ride that New Car Feel
Like the rest of us, you’re busy. You’re running kids to soccer, baseball, and ballet. Some days it feels like you’re living out of your car and well, it looks like it too. How can you declutter your car on the go? Is this even possible? Kathi and Tonya are here to give you car organization ideas and some very practical tips how to accomplish just that. Tune in now!
5 Ways to Declutter Your Car Download
Images Mentioned in the Podcast
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Meet Our Guest
Tonya Kubo
Tonya Kubo is the illustrious, fearless leader of Kathi Lipp’s Clutter-Free Academy Facebook group. She and her husband, Brian, are raising two spirited girls in the agricultural heart of California. She writes about fighting the demons of comparison, clutter and compulsion on www.tonyakubo.com.
June 4, 2018
Get Rid of It: The One Surprising Reason You Will Want to Declutter Half of Your Things and Live Clutter Free
Earlier this week, I was so proud of myself. I finally decluttered my jewelry.
Why is this such a huge deal?
Because I love jewelry. Love it. And to get rid of it? Is so very, very hard for me. (Like Sophie’s Choice hard for me…)
For most of my life, I loved clothes. They were my passion and my weakness. And I still do love clothes, but as an adult I always loved shoes and jewelry more because, let’s face it, shoes and jewelry always fit.
That is, until I got plantar fasciitis in both feet and my shoes weren’t comfortable anymore. Then jewelry became my main source of joy. But my jewelry game? Had gotten out of hand.
I had so many chunky earrings and huge necklaces that it was getting harder and harder to actually use them. They were just giant clumps of tortoiseshell, gold and plastic all hanging together, unusable. It got to the point where I was just picking one of the same three necklaces and couple of pairs of earrings every day because untangling the mess of other jewelry was just too much.
So I finally had to deal with it —dive into this pile of crazy and start to untangle the rat’s nest. But as we all know, organizing is not enough. You have to get rid of it: what you don’t use, love, or wouldn’t buy again.
Get Rid of It – How I Learned to Love My Stuff More By Having Less of It
My goal? Get rid of half of my jewelry.
Now, if you have recently decluttered your jewelry, I would not advise letting go of half your pieces. But for me, who apparently had the same hoarding tendencies as a squirrel before the apocalypse, it needed to be done. I couldn’t just organize my jewelry. I had to get rid of it.
So I started to make piles based on the Clutter Free 3 Questions. In one pile: what did I love and use, and what would I buy again if I lost it. In the other pile: things I hadn’t used and wouldn’t buy again, that I liked, but didn’t love.
And of course, there was the undecided pile.
As I sorted, I realized that my undecided pile was bigger than the other two piles combined.
It was time to make some hard decisions:
I picked up each piece and got tough.
I had another pair of earrings that I could wear in place of the pair I’m holding in my hand? Get rid of it.
I don’t wear this necklace because it scratches my neck? Get rid of it.
I bought this bracelet because I thought it would go with everything, and that’s why I never wear it—it doesn’t feel special. Get rid of it.
Someone gave me this pin as a white elephant gift. It is so not my style. Get rid of it.
It was hard. Really hard. I love my stuff. Truly.
And when I was done, I squeaked by with having just half the jewelry that I had before. VICTORY!
But of course, that is when the doubts set in:
What if I got rid of something I will miss?
What if I buy a new shirt and I just gave away the necklace that will go perfectly with it?
Didn’t I just waste a ton of money?
And those doubts stayed with me—until the next morning.
When I got dressed and went to pick out my jewelry, I felt overwhelmed, but in a good way.
I now had so many great options. And I could actually see them. I was excited about picking out jewelry again. And that is the number one reason to get rid of half your stuff. It instantly doubles your choices.
How does getting rid of half your stuff actually double your choices?
You can actually see what you have. When you have too much stuff, it’s easy to lose some of your favorite things in the process. By getting rid of half your stuff, you uncover your hidden gems. If you need a great way to see all your stuff, I just bought this jewelry organizer from Hobby Lobby and I can’t even tell you how much I’m loving seeing my stuff displayed. Glory be!
You are not overwhelmed by the amount of your stuff. Several times in the past when I’d go to put on jewelry, I would look at the tangled mess and just give up. Now, I am no longer overwhelmed by my choices.
You keep the best and get rid of the rest. This is a great opportunity to really curate your style. If you bought a necklace with feathers because it seemed good at the time, you can reevaluate who you are and what you love and keep only the things that fit and support your current lifestyle.
You know what you still need. When you are brave enough to get rid of half your stuff, you will see some holes. My favorite turquoise earrings have now become earring (singular). The necklace I wore daily a year ago is tangled beyond hope. It may be time to find the new pair of turquoise earrings you love, or replace the chain on that favorite necklace.
Get Rid of It: Other Categories to Cut in Half
Now that I’ve done this halving with my jewelry, I’ve done it in other areas that were out of control:
Makeup
Scarves
Shoes
Bowls
Kitchen gadgets
Books
Magazines
Towels
Linens
Pens
Office supplies
Cleaning products
And can I tell you—in each of these categories where I’ve gotten rid of half of my stuff? I haven’t missed one little thing.
Plus, with giving away half of my things, I know I’ve made it possible for a single mom to have something new for herself for the first time in a long time.
Hmmm…keeping it unused at my house, or loved at someone else’s house? Why is this even a question?
May 30, 2018
Creating the Closet You Love: Declutter Your Wardrobe with These Seven Closet Solutions to Help You Get Dressed and Out the Door Every Single Day
As much as I know you want closet solutions, I know it can be incredibly challenging to actually give things away. Here are some ideas that will help you love what you own, cut down on what you don’t, and have more choices without being overwhelmed.
Closet Solutions #1: Go through your closet at the beginning of every season.
When is the best time to donate Christmas decorations? In November when you’re unpacking your own decorations—that way, some other family will be able to decorate their tree on the cheap and enjoy their holidays. The best time to run a donation of summer dresses, flip flops and cotton shorts to your favorite charity is when you declutter your wardrobe at the beginning of spring. That way, some other mom can have something new and cute to start off her spring.
Use the Clutter Free 3 Box, 2 Bag System to make your twice-a-year closet decluttering system fast and effective.
Closet Solutions #2: Make Donations Easy
One of my favorite decluttering solutions is to have a donation bag right inside my closet. If I try something on and it doesn’t look as great as I thought it did, has a stain on it that I can’t get out (donations centers will take stained or ripped clothes and sell it by the pound), or doesn’t fit anymore (it happens), I can drop it into the bag. When the bag is full, I take it down to the car and the next time I’m driving by my charity, I drop the bag off there.
If you have to have a new plan every time you want to donate something, it’s probably easier to just leave that piece of clothing in your closet—leading to clutter. Make getting rid of clothes that don’t pass the clutter free test easy.
Closet Solutions #3: Turn All Your Hangers Backwards
This trick is the best way to have hard evidence whether I’ve worn something or not. In case you haven’t heard about this system, let me explain: At the beginning of a season (I do this in the Spring and in the Fall), hang up everything in your closet backwards. As you get dressed, pull clothes out with the hanger. When you go to hang up clothes again, hang them up normally. At the end of a season, if I’ve never taken that hanger out of my closet to wear, that means that I really, really don’t wear that piece of clothing and I can donate it guilt-free. If you still can’t decide, use the Clutter Free 3 Clarifying Questions to decide fast.
Closet Solutions #4: Create Outfits You Love From What You Have
When most of us are looking for closet solutions, it’s because we have all these clothes and nothing to wear. And that’s because we’re trying to get dressed in the few minutes before we get out the door. The worst time to try to put an outfit together? When you need to put an outfit together. Spend some time pulling a few outfits together now when you have the time, brain space and creativity to do so.
With all the talk of a capsule wardrobe, many of us are told we have to dump all our clothes and start over with some basics that can mix and match into a thousand different outfits.
Not true.
When whittling down your wardrobe, the most important thing is to start with the pieces you have and already love. Pull out the things you love, wear and make you feel fab. Then start seeing what you need to do to make those pieces work for you. Do you need to refresh some of your t-shirts to make your jeans and trench look fresh? Maybe you have been ignoring your jewelry game and it’s time to get a couple of standout pieces to tie things together.
Remember—clothes are supposed to be at least a little bit of fun. And all the closet solutions in the world are not going to fund a shopping spree for a new capsule wardrobe…
If you are not having a little fun putting outfits together, I want to give you permission to loosen up a bit and let your creative juices flow. I think this is especially important for any of us (raising my hand here…) who struggle with not loving the state our body is currently in.
If you’ve spent very little time thinking about how you dress (except crying in front of your closet, on your knees, praying up a miracle), it’s time to get some inspiration. Go on Pinterest and create a wardrobe category. Look at the clothes you already love in your closet and then look for pins that have outfits with similar pieces. Get inspired by the women who think about clothes 24/7 and then just borrow their genius (because who has time for that).
Try putting together “looks” for the coming week and figure out how you can make your clothes work double time both for work and for weekend, running errands and going to church.
I challenge you to put together seven days of amazing outfits—shoes, jewelry, bags, the whole bit. Have fun with your clothes again and get a serious game of dress-up going.
Closet Solutions #5: Create a Shopping List
Get the scene from Pretty Woman out of your head. We are not talking a shopping spree here. Now is the time to create a list of a few items that would tie your wardrobe together.
For instance, I have a pair of tan pants with tiny white polka dots that I love. But I realized that I wasn’t wearing them because the shirt I have to go with them is on the warm side and I want to wear these in hot weather. A lightweight, flowy white shirt would go perfectly with these pants.
But, a lightweight, flowy white shirt would also go with a lot of other clothes that I love, so a lightweight, flowy white shirt is going on my list.
Last year, I wanted a pair of olive green cargo pants more than I wanted to be on Trading Spaces. I put them on the list in April, and kept looking and looking for the perfect pants. The problem? I couldn’t find them. Anywhere. It was like all the shops in the world conspired against me to keep clothes out of my reach.
Finally, I had to go international in my search. In July, my husband and I took a trip to Canada and while I was in a department store there, I came across the perfect olive cargo pants. It may be the one time in my life I didn’t look at the price tag; I was just so excited to find the pants that I would have spent about any amount of money on them.
And no, they weren’t on sale, and yes, they were more than I normally pay for a pair of pants. But I have worn those pants at least once a week during the fall and spring since I bought them. Other clothes that I’ve bought on sale? Those have lingered in my closet for months. Best Canadian money I’ve ever spent.
So keep a little list. I’ve got one on Evernote on my phone. The other advantage of keeping a list? I go into a store (or online) and look for what’s on the list, not getting distracted by all the shiny things that are out there trying to rob me of my money (and my closet space).
Closet Solutions #6: Know When to Invest and When to Have Fun: Anchor Pieces vs. Fun and Frippy
Every closet should have the basics: the jeans that make go with everything, the black jacket that you can throw on with any shirt you own, the white tailored shirt that makes you feel like a million bucks.
But you should also have a few things that are fun and fab. A few of my favorites? An olive-colored tank top with tiny owls on it, a grey T-shirt with the words “Blah, Blah, Blah” in black sparkle (for when I’ve used up all my words), and a pair of navy Toms shoes with moons and stars on them.
Here is the key to having a closet you love: Invest in the anchor pieces and have fun with the frippy ones.
Anchor Pieces: These are the basic workhorses of your wardrobe you wear all the time and go with everything. Depending on your lifestyle (working in a corporate job outside the home, running a freelance business from your spare bedroom, raising small humans) your basics are going to be very different.
As someone who works from home and could get away with yoga pants and slippers most of the time, I had to put together a working wardrobe so I wasn’t embarrassed to go on a Zoom call or answer the door when the UPS guy showed up. But I don’t have to look like I’m ready to take a meeting in the city everyday either. I keep my anchor pieces in neutrals with just one accent color (Neutrals: black, white, cream, olive—Accent: coral) so that almost everything mixes and matches. Here are my anchor pieces:
Blue jeans
White Jeans
Black jeans
White cotton pants
Cream cotton pants
Black cotton pants
Olive cargo pants
Black tank top
Cream tank top
Olive Tank top
Black T-shirt
Cream T-shirt
Olive T-shirt
White T-shirt
Coral T-shirt
Denim shirt
White button down
White and khaki striped shirt
Olive jacket
Coral cardigan
These are the pieces that I could dress with every day. But where would the fun in that be?
And that’s when the fun and frippy come into play.
These are things like:
Camo
Florals
Patterns
Prints
Kimonos
Graphic Tees
I tend to do most of my fun stuff in shirts and accessories. These are the pieces that express our personality and make dressing fun again.
Closet Solutions #7: Keep the Clothes You Actually Wear
Get rid of the rest. (Guilt free!) We’ve all done it—bought the jacket with feathers on it, decided that epaulets are back in style, bought a shirt that looked cute on our daughter, and then realized our daughter should be the only one who is young enough to wear it.
One of the most important closet solutions is to understand that we all make mistakes, but we don’t need to hang on to them. (Yes – this is a closet solution, but it’s also a life solution).
Maybe you were supposed to own that butterfly T-shirt for just a season, and then get it into the hands of the person who will love it for the next five years. I love how God can use us to help other people get what they want, even if it’s though a mistake of ours.
Make your clothes earn the right to be in your closet. There should be nothing in there that you don’t love, use or would buy again.
May 29, 2018
Episode #306 Is a Balanced Life Possible? Finding Peace in the Busy
Is a Balanced Life Possible? Finding Peace in the Busy
Do you spend your days rushing from one task to the next, frantically checking things off your list? It’s easy to become so consumed with keeping it all together that you forget to seek God’s plan for your life. He has a much better vision for you—fulfillment and peace that only His grace can provide.
Join Kathi and author, speaker, and radio host Susie Larson as they discuss how to help you find balance within your hectic life. You will learn that being at your best doesn’t mean taking on every task, and meaningful satisfaction can’t be bought with a completed to-do list. Be inspired to move past halfhearted living and second bests into a kingdom of rejuvenation, health, and eternal nourishment.
Giveaway
Susie is giving away 3 copies of her book. To be entered, please leave a comment telling us an area you are struggling in and one thing you can do today to help yourself in this area.
In Over Your Head
*US residents only
Meet Our Guest
Susie Larson
Susie Larson is a bestselling author, national speaker, and talk radio host. She connects with thousands of listeners each and every day on her show, Live the Promise with Susie Larson. She’s been married to best friend and husband since 1985; together they have three grown sons, three beautiful daughters in law, one adorable grandson, and a really cool pit bull named Memphis.
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Episode #306 Is a Balanced Life Possible? Finding Peace in the Busy
May 22, 2018
Episode #305 How to get to an absolute Zero Inbox Once a Week & Live Guilt Free Every Single Day in the Process
Is your inbox overflowing? There’s hope for a cluttered inbox and Kathi and Erin MacPherson are here to help with simple steps to show you how to get to an absolute zero inbox once a week and live guilt free every single day in the process. Listen in to find out 9 easy steps to help you bring peace to your inbox and your online life!
Links Mentioned
Erin’s sister’s AirbnB
Meet Our Guest
Erin MacPherson
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
May 21, 2018
How to Declutter Your Home Fast: 3 Clarifying Questions You Must Ask
Standing in front of my closet that is packed like one of those Pillsbury biscuit cans (careful…careful…), yet magically contains nothing to wear, I think to myself, “This is it! I’m going to totally become a minimalist, have a capsule wardrobe and never be stuck in this kind of indecision again. You want to know how to declutter your home fast.”
I get it. So do I. So I start to dig in and declutter. I ready myself with donation bags and an attitude that says, “Get out of my way. I’m DECLUTTERING!” And away I go.
The first shirt is easy. It’s my camo shirt and I wear it anytime it’s clean. (For me, camo is the new floral.) No brainer. It stays.
The next shirt – well, that one’s easy – for all the wrong reasons. It was a promo t-shirt an acquaintance sent me for her book launch. (I’ve noticed one thing about giveaway t-shirts: people order Smalls through Extra Large to send out. If you are bigger than an XL, well, you get an XL—and you’re gonna like it. Friend, next time, save the postage.) Out it goes. This decluttering stuff is so easy!
And then, sometimes the decluttering is not so easy…
Shirt number three. It’s my olive-colored tissue tee I bought at Target. I love the shirt, except it hits me in a funny place, making me wonder if my reflection in the mirror is fourteen months pregnant. I can only wear the shirt with a cardigan or a zip-up sweatshirt. I do have another olive shirt that I like better, but this is a perfectly good shirt. And what if something happened to my favorite olive shirt? I would need a backup. I put it in the maybe pile.
Shirt number four. It’s cute, but I don’t have the right pants for it. But I will find them. Someday. Maybe pile.
And in the next 40 minutes, I’ve got seven shirts in the keep pile, two in the giveaway pile, 24 items in the maybe pile and the rest are still hanging in the closet because it’s all just too much.
You want to know how to declutter your home fast, but the problem…
Because you see, the biggest problem with your stuff isn’t space, or time or money. It’s decision fatigue.
I know you want to declutter your home fast, but I also know that you get to a point in decluttering when you are so tired of making decisions that you just…can’t…do…it… anymore…and it’s too hard.
It helps to remember that we are not supposed to own things for the rest of our lives. Yes, it’s great when we have that throw pillow we use and love for 15 years or that pair of PJs you wear every week for a decade.
But for many of us, we love to change things up, and when we do, it’s important to make way for the new by handing down the old.
Because here’s the thing friend: You don’t get any gold stars for having the most clothes.
And this isn’t just a problem for people with a lot of extra money. I remember when I was unemployed and under-employed as a single mom. I still had friends who would give me their hand-me-downs and instead of buying clothes I loved, I would buy clothes I could afford at cheap discount stores.
As a result, when I look back at my past attempts at decluttering, I’ve finally come to this conclusion: Clutter is indecision.
So how do we get over the obstacle of holding onto things that are crowding our lives? How do we regain the power to make decisions?
Give yourself these 3 Clear Questions if you want to know how to declutter your home fast:
Do I love it?
Do I use it?
Would I buy it again?
If you answer No to two of those questions, I’m guessing that item is truly clutter and it’s time to get rid of it.
Shirt #3 The Olive Shirt
Do I love it? No. I don’t want to look pregnant.
Do I use it? Occasionally, when I’m desperate.
Would I buy it again? No, it doesn’t look good on me.
It’s clutter. Time to go.
Shirt #4 The Shirt I like but it doesn’t go with anything
Do I love it? Yes.
Do I use it? No.
Would I buy it again? No.
It’s clutter. Time to go.
For me, the closet is the hardest place to make these decisions. If I can do it there, I can do it anywhere.
So, how do you make the 3 questions work for you when you want to figure out how to declutter your home fast?
Write them down on a Post-it note. Having the 3 questions in front of you while you’re decluttering will help you stay focused.
Give yourself a goal. Recently, I was going through my jewelry. I hadn’t gone through it in years and there were a lot of things I no longer wear. I gave myself the goal of getting rid of 30 pieces of jewelry. Because I had a goal, I got rid of some pieces that I might have been tempted to hold onto, “just in case.” But the best part of getting rid of the 42 (yes, 42 pieces!) was that I actually rediscovered some pieces I really love and have started wearing again. So not only do I love them (question #1), now I use them (question #2).
Think about the next owner. I think about when I was broke and shopping thrift stores. When I found a shirt I loved that actually fit, I was so grateful to find something in my budget I could wear or that my kids wouldn’t be embarrassed wearing to school. If you are having a hard time parting with something you like but don’t use, picture the person who will be wearing it in three weeks—how that jacket you never wear is now one of their favorite pieces of clothing. Or how that blazer made it so they could walk into a job interview with confidence.
I Promise – You Can Learn How to Declutter Your Home Fast
The next time you are ready to declutter, arm yourself with the 3 questions, a couple of plastic bags, and a prayer of determination.
You can declutter. You can make decisions. You can love your stuff again.
How to Declutter Your Home Fast: 3 Clarifying Questions You Must Ask
May 15, 2018
Episode #304 Fling Your Bag – It’s the Clutter Free Way to Carry Everything you Need
Join Kathi and Erin MacPherson as they talk through why it’s important to clean out your handbag and how to do it. It’s not hard, but it’s important. Grab 2 plastic bags and listen in to hear Kathi’s simple steps to get rid of the clutter in your handbag. You’ll be so glad you did.
As promised, here are the pictures of Kathi’s bags…
Giveaway
Kathi is giving one set of 3 Clear Bags to one listener (US resident only) who shares a great idea for keeping your bag clean and neat. Leave a comment to be entered.
Transcript
Meet Our Guest
Erin MacPherson
Erin MacPherson lives in Austin, Texas with her husband Cameron, her sons Joey and Will and her daughter Kate. She is the author of “The Christian Mama’s Guide Series“, a staff writer for Dun & Bradstreet and a freelancer for publications like Thriving Family Magazine, MOPS MomSense, FamilyLife Magazine, Daily Guideposts and BEMag. She blogs about her life, her kids and her faith at ChristianMamasGuide.com.
Episode #304 Fling Your Bag – It’s the Clutter Free Way to Carry Everything you Need
May 13, 2018
How to Enjoy Your Mother’s Day and Love On a Single Mom
“Isn’t this day supposed to be about ME?” I remember saying those words one frustrated Mother’s Day years ago to a husband who just woke from a nap and kids who were fighting. Sometimes Mother’s Day doesn’t feel like a celebration of mom to MOM. Yes, you could look at it as a holiday created to sell greeting cards. But there’s something about this day that makes you want to feel honored or at the very least, recognized and given a much-needed break.
Maybe you’ve uttered those words to your family in frustration. Or perhaps you relish the fact that on this one day, they are going to knock your socks off with pampering and you are not going to have to think about anything heavy.
And then you see her. The single mom in your church. Huh. Who is making sure she has a great mother’s day? And the guilt starts to whisper that you really should do something but, I mean, really, it’s your ONE day. Squirm.
Clutter Free is about clearing clutter from a lot of areas of your life including your heart and mind. And seeing a mom who needs some help shouldn’t come with a side of guilt. Yes, you still get to enjoy your day. But if you truly want to bless her too, I’ve got two amazingly simple ways:
Remind her kids they need to do something.
Or, simply tell her you see the amazing job she’s doing as a mom on her own.
Told you they were simple.
Remind Her Kids
The first Mother’s Day after my husband died, I expected to wake up to just another day of doing everything for my kids. They were a little older but let’s face it, kids often need to be reminded. So imagine my surprise when my girls, ages 12 and almost-6 surprised me with scrambled eggs, toast, and tea on a pretty platter in bed. It was perfect. Absolutely perfect.
I didn’t need a huge gift. I couldn’t afford to take the kids out to lunch. But the fact that they remembered me was enough to make my Mother’s Day special.
Maybe her kids just need to be reminded to do something for mom on this day. Or perhaps they need some suggestions. If you have the means, giving them a gift certificate to take the family out for dinner is great too. Or, help the kids buy her flowers or something simple. These material things are super nice however I think most moms want to feel appreciated and remembered on this day more than anything. So do what you can.
Be Her Cheerleader
Maybe you don’t know her kids well enough to be the bossy grown-up who asks what they are planning. If not, simply telling her you see all she does and you think she’s rockin’ it is another great blessing.
Being a single parent is incredibly tough. It takes lots of creativity and energy to be all things that your kids need on top of provider and caretaker of the home. Telling a single mom you think she’s doing an amazing job at it is another way to bless her on this day to celebrate moms. Simple and free, this encouragement might come at a time when she’s had a rough day or just be a delightful surprise.
So when God places that single mom in your path as Mother’s Day approaches, don’t feel guilty that you want to enjoy your holiday. That’s self-care and you, fellow mom, have earned a day, too. Instead, ask God how you can best help this single mom.
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Jenn Buell is a writer, speaker, radio DJ and widowed mom of four kids who lives in the beautiful Black Hills of South Dakota. She loves using her superpower of encouragement to cheer on other Christian single moms through her blog and podcast, “Right There With You.” You can connect with Jenn at JennBuell.com.
