Mark DeJesus's Blog, page 131

When Helping Others Goes Too Far: False Burden Bearing

Have you ever taken on someone else’s burden too far…to the point that you owned their breakthrough more than they did? Did their burden begin to become a part of you in a negative way? Are you seeking to please someone and help their burden that you lose yourself in the process?

People-pleasing opens the door for bearing the burdens of others in a way we should not. False burden bearers take the admonition of Paul to bear each other’s burdens[1] to a counterfeit place. They justify their effort, toting Scriptures about denying oneself and serving others, but gradually erode in their quest to help. Those who are undiscerning will say with admiration, “Wow. They are so giving and sacrificing.” Yet when false burden bearers are told to take a break, to rest and take some time for themselves, they have no idea how to even do that. They are often overworked, struggle with boundaries in their life and cannot say no to anyone who needs help.

A Burden You Should Not Carry

False burden bearers gain a sense of fulfillment and identity by carrying burdens they should not be carrying. They have been trained to take on the burden of another person to a place where it is defiling them. They forget that in Paul’s admonition to bear one another’s burden, he also said, each person needs to carry his own load.[2] When confronted, false burden bearers get very defensive, stating they are sacrificing for God and going the extra mile. This may be true, but too often the fruit speaks differently. The one “over-bearing” the burden is burned out, angry and stuck in their spiritual growth.

Pastor Henry Wright taught me, “Mark. You cannot take the sins of other people into your own body.” What he meant is that I can certainly walk along side of people. I am called of God to lay down my life in the Lord’s service to others. I can help them in carrying the burden, but I cannot carry the burden completely for them. I cannot want freedom more than the person with the problem.

This was a change for me, because most people’s garbage would affect me too much. I felt somewhat responsible for their sin issue. Rather than being one who could help equip them, I carried the entire weight of the situation on my shoulders. What a bunch of stress! For years I drowned under the weight of that monster.

I cannot want freedom more than the person with the problem does. 

A World of Drama

Ministries, churches and everyday friends can often live off of “911” calls. People today seem to thrive off of a crisis. They get so used to living with drama in their everyday life, they often don’t know how to live without it.

The truth is those in a crisis did not get there overnight. In addition, everything is not going to change overnight.

But that fact does not seem to matter today. The demand our modern culture puts on ministries, churches and help centers is insane.

We have been trained that it is normal for others to respond instantaneously to our needs.

If churches are not careful, we will mistake ourselves as a 911 emergency center and our own heart health will be compromised. We have to learn to get to the point where we are secure in who we are, to not fall underneath the demands of every single person who calls out. If we did, our lives would be a mess. And many are.

We have to set our hearts for a marathon of serving mankind, not a quick sprint that burns us out. The only way to do this is to live at the pace of God and help those whom the Father is leading us towards.

Against the Grain of Culture

This kind of lifestyle makes a lot of demanding people upset, but at the end of the day, if I live as a people-pleaser, I will die on the altar of what other people want from me. We might think that false burden bearing is very spiritual, but we all need a gut check to realize that our striving is not impressing heaven. In fact, we can get in the way of the work that God wants to do in someone’s life by swooping down and trying to solve every problem a person encounters. False burden bearers don’t take into consideration that God may not want them investing in a person to the degree that they are. In the end, our bodies will thank us for the change, because our cellular makeup suffers under the weight of burdens God never called us to carry.

Question: What helps you to see when you are beginning to walk in false-burden bearing? 

[1] Galatians 6:2

[2] Galatians 6:5

Comments: When Helping Others Goes Too Far: False Burden Bearing.

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Are You A Perfectionist?

Are you a perfectionist? Some see this as a completely admirable trait. Many fail to see the long term dangers that perfectionistic tendencies can have on our health, our wholeness and our relationships.

Dictionary.com defines the struggle of perfectionism as a personal standard, attitude, or philosophy that demands perfection and rejects anything less.

Here are some common characteristics that are indicators of this battle with perfectionism. Exposing this battleground is necessary to gain further freedom.

Do you often avoid trying new things because you do not want others to see that you are not good at them?
Do you usually think you should have done things better?
Do you put things off because it will take too much time to do them perfectly? Like it says in Ecclesiastes 11:4 “Whoever watches the wind will not plant; whoever looks at the clouds will not reap” (NIV). In other words, do you procrastinate because you are too busy observing all the challenging and opposing factors?
Do you put off tasks because you do not know exactly how to do them perfectly?
Do you repeatedly re-live mistakes you have made in public?
Do you dislike the idea that you may be just “average” in some area of your life? Do you struggle with contentment in where you are in life?
Do you often feel guilty because you do not accomplish the things that you see others doing?
Do you feel that you have no purpose in life unless you can make a spectacular performance or contribution in some way?
Do you often find yourself focusing on faults in other people or in their work? Do you find yourself often focusing on what others are doing wrong?
Do you find it hard to believe compliments because you don’t meet your own standards?
Do you miss out on the joy of living today, because you are so busy worrying about whether you will be able to do all the things you are committed to in the future?
Do you feel that you won’t be able to get God’s special affection until you “shape up” and meet higher standards for prayer, Bible reading, devotions, and witnessing?
Do you feel that keeping your appearance and home immaculate is important to keeping the approval of others or maintaining a sense of peace?
Do you have a hard time letting things go, but instead obsess over them?

Do these statements ring true for you? If you find that you answer “yes” to many of these, it is a sign that these chains have a work in your life.

The Bible calls us to grow in being perfected, where we grow day by day in Christ. But the stranglehold of perfectionism is a demonic counterfeit that steals your peace in the journey. It does not allow you or those around you to grow up in Christ. It will constantly disqualify you and find areas where you do not measure up.

The stronghold of perfectionism uses Scriptures in an accusatory way, holding you to a standard that you can never meet. It is legalistic, but very subtle, in how it condemns you for not being a “better Christian” or a “better ‘whatever.’” It repeats verses like, “be perfect as God is perfect,” “holiness unto the Lord” and “take up your cross.” Through passages like these, perfectionism accuses and condemns you. If you listen to those thoughts and try to make adjustments, you will find that freedom does not come, because you have been trying to change by listening to accusation.

Perfectionism doesn’t allow you to simply grow day by day, from glory to glory. It is a belief that work or output that is anything less than perfect is unacceptable. Perfectionists are unable to feel satisfaction and contentment because nothing ever seems to be good enough in their own eyes. They never seem to be content or satisfied in their heart. This has a lot to do with the fact that perfectionists measure their worth based on how productive they are or how much they accomplish.

Find out more about how to drive out perfectionistic tendencies in the book, “Exposing the Rejection Mindset.”

Question: What makes perfectionism a challenging pattern to break?

Comments: Are You A Perfectionist?.

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#011: Who is Talking in My Thoughts? | Overcoming Chronic Busyness [Podcast] Show Notes

In today’s episode, I address a question regarding dealing with chronic busy living. Also, our feature presentation is entitled, “Who is Talking in My Thoughts?” as I help you understand the four sources of thought. This will help us understand where thoughts come from.

Q&A Segment: Overcoming Chronic Busyness With Replenished Living

In reference to article entitled, “The Danger of Chronic Busyness”

Ruth Ralph from Oregon Writes:

I have a question for you, you hit the nail on the head for me. Sitting still is indeed torturous for me. So what are some replenishing things I can make goals to do? I would love some suggestions. I grew up in a very very busy home, and I never learned how to slow down, in fact I do not even know what that looks like. I have been sitting out watching the sunset with Jesus, and that is a very nice start. I am embarrassed to share my deficit, but your blog post really hit home and I do not think that I am alone.

I cover this subject in Chapter 10 of “Exposing the Rejection Mindset”

Replenishing Living:

(In chapter 10, I cover things you can begin to apply to overcome chronic busyness and drivenness.)

1. Make replenished living a high priority in how you plan your day.

- be intentional about your day.

- plan your empty spaces – make appointments for “nothing”

- journal (Recommended Resource: Effective Journaling)

2. Address the stronghold: That who you are is what you do.

- we take pride in being productive and when we don’t feel productive, we feel less about ourselves.

- performance living

3. Follow God’s priority for the day.

- I believe we get frustrated because we get ahead of God . . . and we don’t see the “results.”

4. Live a pace that allows for you to land in stillness more easily.

- Slow down your pace . . . so that when you stop to rest more, you are not crash landing every time.

- so many live a fast paced life that it takes forever to come down and be still

5. Get used to times of stillness with no agenda

- many of your battles will be fought in the stillness . . .

“It is important to be bored. You are giving your brain a rest.” ~Malcom Gladwell

6. Incorporate replenishing habits every day.

Television is not replenishing . . . its the opposite

- walks . . .

- Reading . . .

- sitting and taking in your surroundings

- meditation – thinking and pondering on God’s ways

- sit before God with no agenda but to enjoy him. (Write down your thoughts.)

- relational connection with not much agenda

7. Be prepared for resistance.

Make a strong stance in your heart and be ready for resistance.

Song – A Little Longer – from Where You Go I Go by Bethel Live – Jenn Johnson

Feature Presentation: Who is Talking in My Thoughts?

Today’s feature presentation is on the thoughts inside you . . . entitled “Who’s Talking in My Thought?” I want to get into your personal thought life. Let’s take a moment and scan the airways of what you think about . . . What is the atmosphere of thought going on inside of you?

Two Keys To Start:

Your health, your wholeness, your peace, joy are a result of the thought realm that has been cultivated within.
All thoughts have a source. They do not simply come out of nowhere.

About Your Thoughts:

20,000 – 70,000 thoughts course through you in the span of a day
80-90% of it is negative/harmful/toxic/not from God

Four Main Sources of Thought:
1. God

This is on a spiritual plane. God who is spirit, speaking to your human spirit.

You cannot see God, but you can perceive Him, by the work of the Holy Spirit, bringing witness of the word of God to your life.

So as you grow in taking in God’s Word, you will learn to hear His voice more clearly.

John 4:24 (KJV) God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.

In order to hear a thought from God, I have to understand He is spirit.

- He is beyond physical reality and you typically cannot see Him with your five physical senses.

In order to hear a thought from God, I have to understand He operates in truth.

- So I must grow in truth in order to grow in hearing His voice.

Although God can speak in anyway He chooses, He often speaks in the inner dialogue of our thoughts. His voice can almost sound like our own voice.

- can be an impression or thought that drops in you

God’s thoughts produce, life, vurtue, healthy, sanity, strength, healing . . .

Question is, “Do you believe God speaks today?”

Jesus said, “My sheep know my voice . . . “ (John 10:27)

2. From the Five Physical Senses

You are taking in knowledge and information through physical interaction with your world.

Five Physical Senses:

1) Sight

2) Sound

3) Taste

4) Touch

5) Smell

1 & 2 is how you process thought the most.

This is where you are taking in a thought externally from another person or group.

You are constantly taking in thoughts from the physical dimension:

Conversations with friends – friends are very influential
Verbal communication you listen to
Family gatherings
Communication is both Verbal and Non-Verbal
You are not just talking and listening. You are taking in thoughts and developing your own value system.

We are all influencers and we are all being influenced.

Question: who are the people that influence your thought systems?

Where are these thoughts that are being exchanged coming from?

3. From Recall Within the Soul

This is where thought processes are developed from recall of what is already in you.

A thought is developed or grown out of what is already in you.

This is where you stir up the pot of what has been collected.

You are accessing thought from ways of thinking that are already established inside of you.

-           Memory recall

-           Creativity

-           Thinking from your belief system

4. From Your Enemy – Satan’s Army

Satan is the Accuser of the brethren. (Revelation 12:10)

         – Accuser = speaking thoughts against us.

- Brethren = believers

- Day and Night = non stop

Satan has an invisible army that we war against.

Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

The war is over thoughts.

- The thoughts come as feelings, emotions, impressions, temptation.

- The thoughts come in first person, so they sound like your own voice and your own thoughts.

- You are trained in subtle impressions (every thought has a feeling with it) and it is released in first person.

- We must address these thoughts to move further with how God thinks.

Question: How is this episode helping you in your thought life? 

 

Comments: #011: Who is Talking in My Thoughts? | Overcoming Chronic Busyness [Podcast] Show Notes.

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#011: Who is Talking in My Thoughts? | Overcoming Chronic Busyness [Podcast]

In today’s episode, I address a question regarding dealing with chronic busy living. Also, our feature presentation is entitled, “Who is Talking in My Thoughts?” as I help you understand the four sources of thought. This will help us understand where thoughts come from.

Q&A Segment: Overcoming Chronic Busyness With Replenished Living

In reference to article entitled, “The Danger of Chronic Busyness”

Ruth Ralph from Oregon Writes:

I have a question for you, you hit the nail on the head for me. Sitting still is indeed torturous for me. So what are some replenishing things I can make goals to do? I would love some suggestions. I grew up in a very very busy home, and I never learned how to slow down, in fact I do not even know what that looks like. I have been sitting out watching the sunset with Jesus, and that is a very nice start. I am embarrassed to share my deficit, but your blog post really hit home and I do not think that I am alone.

I cover this subject in Chapter 10 of “Exposing the Rejection Mindset”

Replenishing Living:

(In chapter 10, I cover things you can begin to apply to overcome chronic busyness and drivenness.)

1. Make replenished living a high priority in how you plan your day.

- be intentional about your day.

- plan your empty spaces – make appointments for “nothing”

- journal (Recommended Resource: Effective Journaling)

2. Address the stronghold: That who you are is what you do.

- we take pride in being productive and when we don’t feel productive, we feel less about ourselves.

- performance living

3. Follow God’s priority for the day.

- I believe we get frustrated because we get ahead of God . . . and we don’t see the “results.”

4. Live a pace that allows for you to land in stillness more easily.

- Slow down your pace . . . so that when you stop to rest more, you are not crash landing every time.

- so many live a fast paced life that it takes forever to come down and be still

5. Get used to times of stillness with no agenda

- many of your battles will be fought in the stillness . . .

“It is important to be bored. You are giving your brain a rest.” ~Malcom Gladwell

6. Incorporate replenishing habits every day.

Television is not replenishing . . . its the opposite

- walks . . .

- Reading . . .

- sitting and taking in your surroundings

- meditation – thinking and pondering on God’s ways

- sit before God with no agenda but to enjoy him. (Write down your thoughts.)

- relational connection with not much agenda

7. Be prepared for resistance.

Make a strong stance in your heart and be ready for resistance.

Song – A Little Longer – from Where You Go I Go by Bethel Live – Jenn Johnson

Feature Presentation: Who is Talking in My Thoughts?

Today’s feature presentation is on the thoughts inside you . . . entitled “Who’s Talking in My Thought?” I want to get into your personal thought life. Let’s take a moment and scan the airways of what you think about . . . What is the atmosphere of thought going on inside of you?

Two Keys To Start:

Your health, your wholeness, your peace, joy are a result of the thought realm that has been cultivated within.
All thoughts have a source. They do not simply come out of nowhere.

About Your Thoughts:

20,000 – 70,000 thoughts course through you in the span of a day
80-90% of it is negative/harmful/toxic/not from God

Four Main Sources of Thought:
1. God

This is on a spiritual plane. God who is spirit, speaking to your human spirit.

You cannot see God, but you can perceive Him, by the work of the Holy Spirit, bringing witness of the word of God to your life.

So as you grow in taking in God’s Word, you will learn to hear His voice more clearly.

John 4:24 (KJV) God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.

In order to hear a thought from God, I have to understand He is spirit.

- He is beyond physical reality and you typically cannot see Him with your five physical senses.

In order to hear a thought from God, I have to understand He operates in truth.

- So I must grow in truth in order to grow in hearing His voice.

Although God can speak in anyway He chooses, He often speaks in the inner dialogue of our thoughts. His voice can almost sound like our own voice.

- can be an impression or thought that drops in you

God’s thoughts produce, life, vurtue, healthy, sanity, strength, healing . . .

Question is, “Do you believe God speaks today?”

Jesus said, “My sheep know my voice . . . “ (John 10:27)

2. From the Five Physical Senses

You are taking in knowledge and information through physical interaction with your world.

Five Physical Senses:

1) Sight

2) Sound

3) Taste

4) Touch

5) Smell

1 & 2 is how you process thought the most.

This is where you are taking in a thought externally from another person or group.

You are constantly taking in thoughts from the physical dimension:

Conversations with friends – friends are very influential
Verbal communication you listen to
Family gatherings
Communication is both Verbal and Non-Verbal
You are not just talking and listening. You are taking in thoughts and developing your own value system.

We are all influencers and we are all being influenced.

Question: who are the people that influence your thought systems?

Where are these thoughts that are being exchanged coming from?

3. From Recall Within the Soul

This is where thought processes are developed from recall of what is already in you.

A thought is developed or grown out of what is already in you.

This is where you stir up the pot of what has been collected.

You are accessing thought from ways of thinking that are already established inside of you.

-           Memory recall

-           Creativity

-           Thinking from your belief system

4. From Your Enemy – Satan’s Army

Satan is the Accuser of the brethren. (Revelation 12:10)

         – Accuser = speaking thoughts against us.

- Brethren = believers

- Day and Night = non stop

Satan has an invisible army that we war against.

Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

The war is over thoughts.

- The thoughts come as feelings, emotions, impressions, temptation.

- The thoughts come in first person, so they sound like your own voice and your own thoughts.

- You are trained in subtle impressions (every thought has a feeling with it) and it is released in first person.

- We must address these thoughts to move further with how God thinks.

Question: How is this episode helping you in your thought life? 

 

Comments: #011: Who is Talking in My Thoughts? | Overcoming Chronic Busyness [Podcast].

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Are You Living in Performance-Based Christianity?

A rejection mindset provides toxic alternatives to healthy spiritual living, one of them being a performance-based Christianity.

The rejection mindset promotes “law thinking,” where we hope for approval and acceptance based on how well we perform. The thoughts to “work harder” and “do more,” become an internal pressure. These are not inherently evil traits, but they can become that when they are more important than the person’s unconditional acceptance and love from God, where God accepts us because of His Son.

The lure comes that “works” will get them approval and acceptance. When works override being loved unconditionally, God’s design for life becomes spoiled.

At this stage, the problem is that rejection has infected the motives of a person. They are now unknowingly chasing after love and performing for it all along the way. Most of the time, they are not even aware of this motivation. They just feel a “drive” or “impulse” propelling them into their daily actions. Throughout this stage, rejection is subtly implanting counterfeit values. If you’re honest with yourself, you may find these rejection-based motives lurking within. People bound by the performance trap:

People bound by the performance trap:

Feel they have to earn the love and acceptance of others.
Base how they feel about themselves on how well they perform their daily duties. “If I don’t do well, I will not be loved.”
Spend a lot of time mulling over the worries or pressures of tomorrow and fear not doing well in whatever they do. “I will not be accepted or belong.”
Tend to strive and live in a works mentality, where situations fall back on their efforts.
Process their relationship with God in how they can do things to get His attention, versus learning to receive who He is and giving it out.
Take themselves and what they do too seriously, placing constant pressure on themselves. “I can’t deal with not performing well.”
Regularly feel the pressure weigh on them when helping others. The results rest on how they perform.
Spend a lot of time thinking about what others think of them. They over think how they come across to others.
Have this excessive need to be “successful” and become known for their accomplishments.
Are not comfortable with vulnerability and weakness.
Often ignore important relational and identity issues of the heart, usually just to keep going and moving. Remember, with performance, the “show must go on.” 

To gain more freedom over performance-based living, get your copy of “Exposing the Rejection Mindset” today.

Question: In what ways does performance-based thinking and living affect your walk with God? (Comment below) 

Comments: Are You Living in Performance-Based Christianity?.

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The Danger of Chronic Busyness

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Rejection has stolen our identity and given us counterfeit replacements for feeling self-worth; one of them being constant busyness. We have been trained culturally into a lifestyle of constant activity, drivenness and striving. At the end of the day, we feel crunched for time, and we long for some much needed time off. When we get time off, however, we quickly fill up the empty space with more activity and tasks. Too many come back from vacation stating they need a vacation from their vacation.

No One’s Doing Anything About It

Everyone complains about having no margin, but very few are doing anything about it. A lot of this is because there is a spiritual assault that has come against humanity to keep them in a daily grind. People want to be free from this, but fail to realize there is an invisible enemy creating resistance towards people living a rested and whole life.

This is why Paul wrote in Ephesians to “redeem the time, because the days are evil.” The word redeem speaks of taking back, recovering and rescuing, by payment of a price. It also speaks of making wise and sacred use of every opportunity. Have you ever thought of your time as being a sacred gift from God that needs to be watched over wisely; and in some cases taken back when it has been stolen?

Wisdom With Our Time

God knows that if we do not look to take hold of our time and use it wisely, we will get ensnared into the world’s system of constant going and doing. Most people never think that constant busyness has an evil source behind it, but look at the struggles of most “busy” people:

Spending quality time with God.
Spending quality time with family.
Lack of joy. Can’t slow down and enjoy things.
Too much to do.
Feeling overwhelmed, overburdened and overloaded.
Struggling to feel peaceful and being comfortable with being still.

Are you aware that our adversary can craft a spiritual agenda to keep us from what is most important in life? Sometimes all Satan has to do is just keep us too busy to deal with what is important.

A Spiritual Assault

It is my conviction that one of the clear spiritual enemies at work in the climate of developed nations is busyness. We become quickly dragged by an ever-increasing array of tasks that seem to pop up in front of us. Our lives become always about the next event and the next thing. So we fail to stop, reflect, and enjoy what just happened.

Busyness has trained us to always project forward, so we are rarely ever engaged in the present. People cannot seem to settle emotionally. They lack a daily sense of rest. Sitting still without some kind of stimulation is torturous for most, so we keep the schedule full. Then, when we actually get some open time, we fill it with activities that do not replenish us, like watching television, playing video games or checking social media. No wonder we are so tapped out!

Awaiting every hyper-busy person is the torment of guilt. Too often the important things of life get set aside at the mercy of hectic living. At the end of the day, the super-busy person is laden with guilt over the fact they did not spend quality time with their spouse, children, friends or God. Yet, because they are addicted and trapped to the daily grind, they are not able to get out of this vicious cycle.

Question: Where does busyness seem to creep into your life. Feel free to comment below. 

Comments: The Danger of Chronic Busyness.

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#010: What Are You Thinking? [Podcast]

In this episode, I will be speaking on “What Are You Thinking?” Understanding how our thoughts affect us. This is one of my most passionate subjects. It is an area I struggled with for years and it is one that I love teaching on to help people to gain greater freedom in their life.

Special thanks to my son, Maximus DeJesus, for his help on the intro! I am so proud of him!

Teaching Kit Sale:
“Healing and Freedom from the Inside Out”

We are doing a special sale . . . normally 39.99 . . . til Friday

25 sessions with outlines notes for $14.99

Download MP3 – go to markdejesus.com/resources/store

Click here to order!

 

Feature Presentation: “What Are You Thinking?”

In today’s episode, my subject is entitled, “What Are You Thinking?” We want to get to the nitty gritty of how important it is to understand our thought life.

We must understand that the greatest battle that there is, exists in the realm of our thinking and thoughts.

The battle of our lives comes down to how we think, which includes:

1. Feelings

2. Impressions

3. Perceptions

4. Judgments

5. Beliefs

6. Our story

7. Our perception of another person’s story.

8. How we see life and relationships.

9. How we see God.

10. How we see ourselves.

You are bombarded with thoughts, voices, feelings and impressions ALL DAY LONG.

- Every human, has somewhere between 20,000 and 70,000 thoughts in a day.

- On top of this, studies are showing that the majority of people’s thoughts (approximately 80-90%) are negative, toxic and doing harm to the health of our state of mind.

Understanding How Thoughts Affect Us:
1. With every thought, comes an emotion with it.

- You have glands within your body, (the amygdala especially) that processes the emotional feelings associated with your thoughts.

- Humans are not responding to our thoughts, we are responding to how we feel about our thoughts.

- The emotion of is the body’s physiologically trained response to thought.

2. Thoughts cause us to form perceptions.

- habits

- trained reactions

- the way we see ourselves, God and other people.

- create a story, of your past, your present and your future potential.

3. Thoughts form our beliefs.

- How we see life and how we should approach life.

4. Thoughts and beliefs form who we are.

Proverbs 23:7 “As a man thinks within his heart so is he.”

- Who you are, as manifested in this world, is a culmination of the thoughts in your life that have the greatest voice.

- You will become your thoughts.

- You are currently right now, a manifestation of your thoughts.

5. Thoughts Feed Our Potential and Destiny

- you will go as far as you are allowed to think and grow in your thoughts.

- your relationships are all affected by how you process your thinking . . .

6. Thoughts Will Directly Affect our Health in the Long Term

3 John 1:2 “I pray above all things that you be in health and prosper evan as your soul prospers.”

7. All Thoughts Have a Source.

- we are created beings that need to be taught how we think and even how to think . . . how to process thought.

- when we are born, we need to be taught . . . everything.

- when you are first born as a baby, you are not like an animal, you need to be taught how to feed yourself, think for yourself and live life for yourself.

- during that journey, you have picked up thought systems and ways of living, behaving and doing things.

- some are good, some are great. Some are not so great. Some are down right killing you.

8. Not all Thoughts are Your Own.

- One of the most empowering things that every Christian needs to understand: not every thought is your own thought.

- In fact, most of your thoughts are not your own!

- If you are not able to dissect which thoughts are coming from the enemy, then you will have deep challenges in life.

- The enemy uses thoughts to weave a story about God, you and others . . . to keep you bound, to keep you in dysfunctional patterns, and keep you from health.

9. You along are responsible for what you will do with your thoughts.

- It is your responsibility to decide what to do with your thoughts.

- You are the gatekeeper of your thoughts.

(2 Corinthians 10:3-5 NKJV)  3 For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5 casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ

Question: What do you believe are the most troubling thoughts that plague our world today?

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10 Signs You Are a People Pleaser

People pleasing is a monster that will base your sense of well being on how you think everyone feels about you. Its an impossible way of thinking and living, but millions are bound by this pattern.

People pleasing is a rejection-based way of thinking. It trains you to fill your lack of self-esteem and self-worth by maintaining a life of keeping everyone happy. You will end up becoming a peace-keeper rather than a peace maker.

If you are wondering if the people-pleasing monster lurks in your thinking, here are some questions you can ask to stir your discernment. If you answer, “yes” to a bunch of these, you can be certain that there is more freedom awaiting you as you confront this issue.

Common Signs of People-Pleasing

1. You try too hard to be seen as always doing the “right thing.”

2. You have a constant pulse of how others are feeling about you and it deeply affects you.

3. When around other people, you tend to outwardly come into agreement with whatever is being said, even if inwardly you don’t.

4. You tend to play to the opinion of whomever you are talking to.

5. You have a hard time keeping personal boundaries.

6. Receiving criticism is hard to process. It ends up consuming your thoughts.

7. You have a hard time making tough decisions, especially ones that won’t please everyone.

8. You have a hard time saying no, especially without giving 20 reasons why.

9. When not affirmed by others, you become easily depressed.

10. You spend too much time trying to do things for other people who don’t take the help you bring and change. 

If this is a battle in your life, you will be encouraged and equipped by the book “Exposing the Rejection Mindset.” Get your copy today and learn to take your peace in toxic relational patterns!

Question: What have you found to be helpful in overcoming people pleasing?

 

 

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True Spiritual Liberty

Every independence day, we have the amazing privilege of celebrating our country’s independence as a nation. With our cookouts and fireworks, we get to feast on the joy of liberty that we have gained in the foundation of our country. That liberty grants each of us freedom and the ability to go after a life of amazing potential.

Liberty Defined

I looked up the word “liberty” online and the first definition that popped up is “the quality individuals have to control their own actions.” It reminded me of the Scriptural reference to liberty found in Isaiah 61, where God sends His message of freedom to those who will hear.

Isaiah 61:1 NKJV To proclaim liberty to the captives

God’s message is that you would hear His heart being proclaimed to you; a message of liberty to your life. I believe that one of the things God is restoring to those who will hear it, is their ability to have proper control over their own life decisions and actions. So many are bound in their thoughts and feelings, they become slaves to whatever impulses fly through their radar. The enemy has a field day in their thoughts, provoking them to habits and behaviors they can never seem to stop. The message of liberty is the work of Christ that comes to gives you power over the enemy and to live a life where you can freely choose to think and live according to God’s ways without hinderance.

Biblical Liberty

I looked up this word liberty in the Hebrew language of the Old Testament, and found it to mean:

Liberty
A flowing
A free run
Freedom

The dictionary also defines liberty as:

The quality or state of being free:

the power to do as one pleases.
freedom from physical restraint
freedom from arbitrary or despotic control
the positive enjoyment of various social, political, or economic rights and privileges
the power of choice


a right or immunity enjoyed by prescription or by grant : privilege

permission especially to go freely within specified limits



Spiritual Liberty In Your Life

One of the constant observations I see in people is that they have not truly gained the message of liberty that God offers them over the works of the enemy. They are so bound in their thoughts, addicted in their emotions and driven by their every impulse; living as though they have to be victims to how they feel.

The message of the cross does not take away your ability to choose, it empowers you to overthrow everything that is not of God in your life. True spiritual liberty is hearing the message of freedom that God is releasing to His children and taking back your life. Liberty is not something where everything that is difficult is taken away for you. Spiritual liberty in God empowers you to take back your freedom yourself. It is because of Christ and with God’s power, but the choice is yours.

Will you choose liberty today? Take back your freedom.

Question: Where have you tolerated being bound in some way of thinking that you can take back today?

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#009: The Greatest Block to Transformation [Podcast]

In today’s episode, my subject is entitled, “The Biggest Block to Transformation.” In this I will address one of greatest hinderances that keep people from walking healed, free and changed.

I began full time ministry since 1995 and over the years I have watched something very concerning when it comes to people changing, getting free, getting healed or experiencing breakthrough. It was a dysfunctional pattern that occurred slowly. It wore people out and eventually, took them out of the race. I want to share how to this creepy parasite will begin to infiltrate your life if your not discerning. I’ll get to what this is in just a moment . . .

The message of transformation (According to Isaiah 61):

1. The Anointing of Father God. The work of Abba. The Father’s Love

2. Good News from a Good God

3. Delivered to Those Who Recognize they Need It

4. Heal the Broken Hearted

5. God releases a proclamation of freedom . . . he sends a message to us.

6. The prison doors are opened.

Isaiah 61:1 NKJV  the opening of the prison to those who are bound

Notice the pattern here:

1. Good father comes with good news to those who need it.

2. He comes to heal your broken heart.

3. He sends you a message of freedom,

4. As you hear that message, you are taught that freedom is available . . .

5. The prison doors open, you step out.

 

Key: This last stage is critical: you have to walk out of the prison yourself!

We often wait for freedom to come, when really god is waiting for us to hear the message and walk it out ourselves. He will walk with us, but we must take responsibility for our life.

“No one can want your freedom, healing and transformation more than you.”

 

Benefits of Hearing the Message of Transformation and Walking It Out:
1. I learn what it takes to get free.
2. I learn what it is like to live free.
3. I begin living free before the whole picture comes together.
4. I form a belief system that creates a new story.

The Biggest Block to Transformation: when our problem, battle or struggle is no longer something we are working against to break through and break free. We become used to the prison and we settle into a place of a defeated life.

- our battle becomes our prison

- what we fought now owns us

- what we pushed against eventually wore us out.

- our sickness, illness and bondage, now becomes our identity . . .

- obstacles now imprison us into a victim mindset . . . we then develop a bunch of reasons why we cannot get healed and free. Why we cannot change.

- our prison owns us

- you quit

- you tolerate a lesser life . . .

Examples:

- Battling thoughts in the mind that don’t seem to stop . . .

- Battling a sickness . . .

- Going through financial hardship . . .

What Happens When Our Prison Owns Us:
1. We develop a dysfunctional relationship with God.
2. Hope dies. Stop dreaming.
3. Passion dies
4. We get used to poison and toxicity.
5. Victim mindset
6. Self- pity sets in.

- Free Resource Link: “Take the Limits Off” Audio Teachings

7. We Stay the same.
8. We can no longer hear the message of freedom

Question: Do you want to be healed? Do you want to be changed? Do you want to be free? 

How to Walk Past this Obstacle:
1. Take responsibility for yourself.
2. Renounce living as a victim to life.
3. Begin creating a new story.
4. find people who will help feed the dreamer in your life.
5. Be ready to hear the hard truth.
6. Get up and do something!

Do something different.

Question: What different thing can you do today to break yourself out of imprisonment? 

Don’t Quit

 

“God’s Great Dance Floor” by Chris Tomlin on Passion Album: Let the Future Begin

 

 

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