Mark DeJesus's Blog, page 130

4 Ways to Listen to the Transformed You Podcast Show

For those of you on the mailing list who have not been able to tune in the weekly Transformed You episodes, you are missing some great insight and encouragement to walk more healing and free through inside out transformation.

Every week, we post a Transformed You episode on Wednesday afternoon. As we gain momentum, my goal is so spend half of the time addressing a subject while using the other half to address a question that has been submitted. We are getting amazing feedback already!

To help you get the full advantage of the show, I wanna share 4 easy ways you listen to the weekly broadcast:

1. Listen Right Through Your Web Browser. 

You can do this on any computer or smart phone that can browse the internet.

Go to markdejesus.com, the home site of Transformed You.

At the top, click on “Podcast.”

The next page will show you listing of all the podcast episodes. Click on the episode you would like to view.

You will then be taken to the show page, which gives you the ability to see any notes regarding the show, main points and any links I reference on the show.

You can listen by clicking on the “play button.” You can also download the audio file to your computer as well.

2. Listen via iTunes.

ITunes, a music program designed by Apple, is the most common software people use to listen to podcasts on their computer. You can also use Zune (although Microsoft has been making some changes to this), gPodder, Miro and Juice. iTunes is one I recommend and is very easy to use. Via iTunes, go to the iTunes store and search “Mark DeJesus” or “Transformed You.” Select Transformed You and click on subscribe.

3. Listen via iPhone or iPad.

Using the app store on any IOS device and search “podcast.” There you can freely install the podcast app so you can listen.

Once the app is installed, open it and search for “Mark DeJesus” or “Transformed You.”

4. Listen va Stitcher on Android Phones.

If you have an Android device that uses Google to interface with the phone or tablet, you can download the Stitcher app from the Google play store.

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My Personal Battle with Perfectionism

When you see the battle of perfectionism, most of the time it is addressed in counseling and psychology circles, where they are noticing this bondage in person after person. Christians often come under it the most, especially since we have been taught a standard of holiness and sanctification to pursue. Yet legalism, our personal brokenness and various twisting of Scriptures has brought in a yoke that God never intended us to carry.

Perfectionism Battles are Very Spiritual

We cannot see perfectionism simply as a psychological defect, but a spiritual battle waging over our peace and freedom. Too often we see battles in our mind, without any regard to the invisible work of the enemy’s camp that may be at the source of our thoughts and behaviors.

This is the reason we need to know who is talking in our thinking and take every thought captive. (2 Corinthians 10:5) Perfectionism is the enemy’s way of distorting our desire to walk in holiness. He perverts it so that we become religiously bound and hindered from freedom. We cannot just see this as a mind battle, but also as a spiritual assault to keep us free.

I am passionate about eliminating this perfectionistic burden from the body of Christ for two main reasons. The first is that this counterfeit is operating heavily today and needs to be address. The second is personal: this stronghold owned my life for far too long. 

My Own Battle

For years, it robbed me of peace and kept me from being able to enjoy life at its fullest. It took my desire to please God and twisted it into a performance, driveness and perfectionistic mindset that would not allow me to have peace. I thought that once I achieved a goal, I would experience rest. Yet nothing I achieved ever brought me peace, because nothing was ever good enough. There was always something better that could be done and always something that was wrong in everything.

I had no joy and no ability to appreciate what I had in life. I deeply struggled to be “present” in life, because my mind was trained to focus on the next thing coming that just “had to be perfect.” Everything in life needed to be amazing and over the top or else I was in torment. Performance was higher in value than relationship, because my identity was based on performance. The pressure began to build and build, until I realized how it had owned many areas of my thinking. It had literally programmed me in toxic behaviors. This all lead back to the fact that I was not secure in God’s love and acceptance of me. It lead to a poor self-view and sense of identity, so I poured myself into perfectionistic performance to try and find who I am.

The fear of failure along with the fear of being weak and flawed haunted me. If I made a mistake I was tormented inside. If someone saw the mistake it was a dead end street in my mind. I had a hard time not feeling like mistakes were the end of the world. Weakness in my mind was a dead-end failure and unacceptable. To be very honest, those who live with perfectionism have a really hard time knowing how to live without it. This was also true in my life.

For so long I thought I was walking in excellence, but I was deceived. When I came to the realization of the perfectionism bondage in me, I began to see how I was not walking in excellence. This was a tormenting bondage.

Until I really saw how this was damaging me, I still fell under perfectionism’s programming. I had to make a brave decision to leave these chains behind and walk in a new dimension of rest–with myself and with others. When I saw how it was affecting my mind and my health, I made a decision for freedom–a freedom that I thought before would never be available for me.

I have made the decision that I want to live free. I want to live in such a way where the pressure is off and I am free to be me as God sees me to be. It is my commitment to live a longer life and live in greater health. Part of that involves leaving performance, perfectionism and driveness behind. I cannot be a victim of what happens around me. I also cannot live in a prison of my own failures. Christ did not die on the cross so that I would be tormented against myself with inward conflict and self-pressures that bind.

So many today are driven to make a name for themselves, build a large ministry and business–all in the name of God, but driven by a perfectionistic spirit of driveness that is operating at man’s pace and man’s power. The pace of it is killing us. These patterns may make someone successful in the world’s eyes, but it renders us ineffective in our long-term health and effectiveness in God’s Kingdom.

When I put this perfectionistic mindset behind me, I could see the results almost instantly. It has its awkward stages, but I begin to feel like a million bucks in every way. The pressure gets released, the burden to perform is no longer a yoke and the results are left in God’s hands. It is now my responsibility to show up, be myself and grow at each stage. The results are in God’s hands and I must take my peace in that.

I must give room for weakness and mistakes, for they are not the end, but a beginning for change. I need to be ok with flaws in front of people – because people are more touched by our challenges than where we seem to look perfect. As I become less perfectionistic, I am less tempted to put unrealistic expectations on others. Anger loses its hold and stress begins to face as I take my peace in my journey with God. He is OK to walk with us in our imperfected state–so I need to take my peace and rest in that each day.

How bout you? Where are you seeing the need for perfectionism to be removed from your life? 

 

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#014: Did God Just Say Something? | Q&A: Drivenness vs Rest [Podcast] Show Notes

In today’s episode entitled, “Did God Just Say Something?” I am going to uncover some various ways that God can speak to us. I also address in our Q&A segment a question, where I address drivenness and rest in a question, “What is the difference between drivenness and passion?”

Q&A Segment: Drivenness vs Rest

Jordan Melendez from Wethersfield, Connecticut asks, “What is the difference between drivenness and passion?”

Recommended Reference: Exposing the Rejection Mindset

Feature Presentation: Did God Just Say Something?

7 Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says:

“ Today, if you will hear His voice,

8 Do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion,

In the day of trial in the wilderness,

9 Where your fathers tested Me, tried Me,

And saw My works forty years.

10 Therefore I was angry with that generation,

And said, ‘ They always go astray in their heart,

And they have not known My ways. ’

11 So I swore in My wrath,

‘They shall not enter My rest.’”

Hebrews 3:7-11 (NKJV)

Hearing God’s voice: 

1. Keeps our hearts soft. 

2. Keeps us from rebellion. 

3. Keeps us from going astray. 

4. Keeps us in the way we need to go. 

5. Keeps us in REST. 

How Does God Speak:
1. Anyway that He wants to! 
2. Through the Word of God (Scriptures) 
3. In our seeking. 

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7 NKJV

Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:12-13 NKJV

It is the glory of God to conceal a matter,

But the glory of kings is to search out a matter.

Proverbs 25:2 NKJV

4. Dreams and Visions

‘And it shall come to pass in the last days, says God,

That I will pour out of My Spirit on all flesh;

Your sons and your daughters shall prophesy,

Your young men shall see visions,

Your old men shall dream dreams.

Acts 2:17 NKJV

5. Within Your Own Inner Dialogue
6. Audibly 
7. Healthy Desire

Delight yourself also in the Lord,

And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Psalms 37:4 NKJV

Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,

“This is the way, walk in it,”

Whenever you turn to the right hand

Or whenever you turn to the left.

Isaiah 30:21 NKJV

Comments: #014: Did God Just Say Something? | Q&A: Drivenness vs Rest [Podcast] Show Notes.

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#014: Did God Just Say Something? | Q&A: Drivenness vs Rest

In today’s episode entitled, “Did God Just Say Something?” I am going to uncover some various ways that God can speak to us. I also address in our Q&A segment a question, where I address drivenness and rest in a question, “What is the difference between drivenness and passion?”

Q&A Segment: Drivenness vs Rest

Jordan Melendez from Wethersfield, Connecticut asks, “What is the difference between drivenness and passion?”

Recommended Reference: Exposing the Rejection Mindset

Feature Presentation: Did God Just Say Something?

7 Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says:

“ Today, if you will hear His voice,

8 Do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion,

In the day of trial in the wilderness,

9 Where your fathers tested Me, tried Me,

And saw My works forty years.

10 Therefore I was angry with that generation,

And said, ‘ They always go astray in their heart,

And they have not known My ways. ’

11 So I swore in My wrath,

‘They shall not enter My rest.’”

Hebrews 3:7-11 (NKJV)

Hearing God’s voice: 

1. Keeps our hearts soft. 

2. Keeps us from rebellion. 

3. Keeps us from going astray. 

4. Keeps us in the way we need to go. 

5. Keeps us in REST. 

How Does God Speak:
1. Anyway that He wants to! 
2. Through the Word of God (Scriptures) 
3. In our seeking. 

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7 NKJV

Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:12-13 NKJV

It is the glory of God to conceal a matter,

But the glory of kings is to search out a matter.

Proverbs 25:2 NKJV

4. Dreams and Visions

‘And it shall come to pass in the last days, says God,

That I will pour out of My Spirit on all flesh;

Your sons and your daughters shall prophesy,

Your young men shall see visions,

Your old men shall dream dreams.

Acts 2:17 NKJV

5. Within Your Own Inner Dialogue
6. Audibly 
7. Healthy Desire

Delight yourself also in the Lord,

And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Psalms 37:4 NKJV

Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,

“This is the way, walk in it,”

Whenever you turn to the right hand

Or whenever you turn to the left.

Isaiah 30:21 NKJV

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Perfectionism Bondage vs. Biblical Excellence – What’s the Difference?

Many who battle perfectionism, may hear a thought screaming, “But doesn’t God want our best?”

Of course He does. The problem is that legalism has entered and placed a performance pressure on us that burdens us with standards that torment rather than empower us. Rather than releasing us into daily rest, we become driven to achieve. Yet that driveness is never satisfied, so contentment is never cultivated. We have to be very careful that we do not sacrifice contentment and inward peace on the alter of producing what we have been trained see to as “perfect” results.

So how do I know if I am in perfectionistic bondage or just simply being perfected as the Bible teaches? What helps me to know if I am following bondage or simply walking in excellence?

Perfectionism needs to be contrasted from biblical excellence. Excellence as we often define it in Turning Hearts is giving the best with what you have and where you are at. Under the mindset of excellence, we give all or ourselves, but we are not under bondage and torment in the process. There is a different spirit behind perfectionism than walking in true biblical excellence.

Perfectionism vs. Biblical Excellence

The difference between these two realities often comes comes down to how we handle mistakes. Processing mistakes is a key issue in our generation. How well do we handle mistakes in ourselves? How well do we handle mistakes in others? This is often where we can see if we are in perfectionism bondage.

Do You Learn Through Your Mistakes?

We do not really learn the most from successes. Yet we have the opportunity to learn so much through mistakes. The problem is that so many are paralyzed by the fear of making a mistake, that when we err, the torment is debilitating. Because of this, we often avoid taking risks or stepping out into uncharted territory. The insecurities within us flare up, telling us to stay as far away from any failure or mistakes as possible, for that would be the end of the world.

Judgmentalism

In addition, our culture is so infiltrated in perfectionistic standards that we are ready to stone someone in judgment the moment they begin to show flaws. Because of this, so many are held back in life and they are tormented by a fear of making mistakes. In addition, perfectionists see mistakes as defects that make them unacceptable.

Contrasting Perfectionism Bondage and Biblical Excellence

Let’s take a moment to understand the differences so that we can discern when perfectionism is in operation in our thinking and behavior. 

Perfectionism’s Mindset: 

1. In perfectionism, the value of a person is dependent upon performance. In other words, who you are is completely based on what you do, therefore a great deal of pressure depends on how well you perform in life.

2. Under the influence of perfectionism, goals are set for yourself and others that are unreasonable and often impossible. This opens the door for too much pressure to be taken on at the jump. This is what leads to easy disappointment and anger down the road.

3. The motivation behind perfectionism is the fear of failure. It drives and motivates you relentlessly.

4. Perfectionism remains tirelessly focused on mistakes and failures while discounting and minimizing successes. The mistakes become magnified while the good things become occluded from view and unappreciated. Even when huge victories come, perfectionism places a higher burden for the next time.

5. Those with perfectionism strongholds in their life take criticism personally and have a constant need to defend themselves. They become trained to over-react over issues that should not be taken so strongly.

6. Perfectionism trains us to constantly dread the future, because the pressure alone is draining in itself. Because of this, we can never enjoy anything.

7. Perfectionism leaves us spiraling in depression when we or others fail or slip up.

8. A person with perfectionism immerses his identity and security in the results that happen around him. His sense of well being is deeply connected to the results.

9. The end result for a perfectionist = burnout. They think a vacation will help, but it only provides a temporary band-aid. What they often do not understand is that what they need for change to take place is a complete overhaul. Everything has to change to get free from perfectionism.

The Freeing Mindset of Biblical Excellence: 

In direct contrast,

1. Biblical excellence teaches us that believers are all accepted by God who gave us our value as His children. We could never earn it. That acceptance fuels us with His grace to walk out a life of effectiveness with nothing to prove. Who we are is not what we DO. WHO WE ARE IS what we do.

2. In Biblical Excellence you put your whole heart into it, but you leave all the results in God’s hands. We are not in control of the results. We are only responsible to show up and be present to offer who we are to the world.

3. In Biblical Excellence, we are motivated by the love and acceptance God has given us.

2 Corinthians 5:14 For the love of Christ compels us . . .

4. When we walk in Biblical Excellence, we learn from our mistakes and put them behind us.

Philippians 3:13-14

Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

If you notice, the Bible describes someone who cannot handle correction a scoffer (Proverbs 9:8-9). They are fools that resist correction and not teachable in their ways. Quite often in perfectionistic thinking, we can become blocked from healthy correction that can lead us into greater fruit. Often the correction will involve needing to release ourselves of the pressure that gets carried on our backs.

5. In Biblical Excellence, we recover strongly from mistakes. In simple terms, mistakes are not the end, but a step to learning more and growing.

Proverbs 24:16

For a righteous man may fall seven times and rise again, but the wicked shall fall by calamity.

6. With the mindset of Biblical Excellence, we become excited about future challenges, knowing that God has our back all the way through and will empower us to grow and overcome. 

Romans 8:31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

7. With a mindset of Biblical Excellence, we receive the comfort of God and choose to hope in God in all things. Therefore we have no need to constantly spiral in discouragement.

Psalm 42:5 Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him For the help of His countenance.

8. When we understand Biblical Excellence, we learn in all ways to be content. Contentment creates a gratitude within us whereby we can never be defeated by discouraging events or occurrences around us. We are also not thrown by what is or is not happening in our lives. Contentment is always joyful for everything God has done!

Philippians 4:11  for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content

9. The end result of someone who walk in Biblical Excellence = rest.

Hebrews 4:11 Let us therefore be diligent to enter that rest . . .

Matthew 11:28-30  Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

 Question: Where do you hunger to see more of Biblical Excellence operating in your life? 

Comments: Perfectionism Bondage vs. Biblical Excellence – What’s the Difference?.

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#013: Why Can’t I Hear God? | Q&A Why Does God Allow War? [Podcast] Show Notes

In this episode, “Why Can’t I Hear God?” I will address the struggle that many have to hear God’s voice. I will address the hinderances to hearing His voice. In our Q&A segment, I address the question, “Why Does God Allow War?”

Q&A Segment: “Why Does God Allow War?”

Jose Berrios from Brooklyn, New York asks, “Why Does God Allow War?”

Song during this segment is “The Walk” by Steven Curtis Chapman on his album, Greatest Hits

Feature Presentation: “Why Can’t I Hear God?”

Today’s feature presentation, entitled, “Why Can’t I Hear God?” I will address the challenge where we want to sense and hear God’s thoughts and His voice in our hearts, but we struggle to. I am going to address now, some key reasons why you may not be hearing His voice.

Key Here: You don’t need to go into any condemnation, shame or any thoughts of, “I am not good enough” because that is what the enemy wants to get you caught up in, to steal the simplicity of having every day relationship with God.

Hindrances to Hearing God’s Voice:  12 Reasons You May Not be Hearing God’s Voice
1. You are not born again.

Jesus answered and said to him, “ Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. (John 3:3 NKJV)

But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned. (1 Corinthians 2:14 NKJV)

2. A busy and hurried lifestyle.     

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalms 46:10 NKJV)

a still small voice. (1 Kings 19:12 NKJV)

3. Not Knowing the Love of God

And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him. (1 John 4:16 NKJV)

4. Not Having a Revelation of God’s Goodness

So Jesus said to him, “ Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. (Luke 18:19 NKJV)

Reference Podcast = Episode 005: Is God Really Good?

5. Not Having the Word Hidden in your Heart

And Jehovah saith unto me, `Thou hast well seen:for I am watching over My word to do it. (Jeremiah 1:12 YLT)

6. Ungrateful Heart

Enter into His gates with thanksgiving,

And into His courts with praise.

Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.

For the Lord is good;

His mercy is everlasting,

And His truth endures to all generations.

(Psalms 100:4-5 NKJV)

7. Bitterness and Unforgiveness

And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. “ So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.” (Matthew 18:34-35 NKJV)

Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (1 Peter 3:7 NKJV)

8. Fear

Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, “ Where are you?” So he said, “ I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself. (Genesis 3:9-10 NKJV)

9. Outright Rebellion Against Gods Ways

If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear. (Psalms 66:18 NKJV)

10. Demands We Put on God

You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures. (James 4:2-3 NKJV)

11. Occultism and Counterfeit Spirituality In Our Lives

For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. (2 Corinthians 11:14 NKJV)

12. Unresolved Disappointment

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life. (Proverbs 13:12 NKJV)

 

 

 

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#013: Why Can’t I Hear God? | Q&A Why Does God Allow War?

In this episode, “Why Can’t I Hear God?” I will address the struggle that many have to hear God’s voice. I will address the hinderances to hearing His voice. In our Q&A segment, I address the question, “Why Does God Allow War?”

Q&A Segment: “Why Does God Allow War?”

Jose Berrios from Brooklyn, New York asks, “Why Does God Allow War?”

Song during this segment is “The Walk” by Steven Curtis Chapman on his album, Greatest Hits

Feature Presentation: “Why Can’t I Hear God?”

Today’s feature presentation, entitled, “Why Can’t I Hear God?” I will address the challenge where we want to sense and hear God’s thoughts and His voice in our hearts, but we struggle to. I am going to address now, some key reasons why you may not be hearing His voice.

Key Here: You don’t need to go into any condemnation, shame or any thoughts of, “I am not good enough” because that is what the enemy wants to get you caught up in, to steal the simplicity of having every day relationship with God.

Hindrances to Hearing God’s Voice:  12 Reasons You May Not be Hearing God’s Voice
1. You are not born again.

Jesus answered and said to him, “ Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. (John 3:3 NKJV)

But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned. (1 Corinthians 2:14 NKJV)

2. A busy and hurried lifestyle.     

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalms 46:10 NKJV)

a still small voice. (1 Kings 19:12 NKJV)

3. Not Knowing the Love of God

And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him. (1 John 4:16 NKJV)

4. Not Having a Revelation of God’s Goodness

So Jesus said to him, “ Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. (Luke 18:19 NKJV)

Reference Podcast = Episode 005: Is God Really Good?

5. Not Having the Word Hidden in your Heart

And Jehovah saith unto me, `Thou hast well seen:for I am watching over My word to do it. (Jeremiah 1:12 YLT)

6. Ungrateful Heart

Enter into His gates with thanksgiving,

And into His courts with praise.

Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.

For the Lord is good;

His mercy is everlasting,

And His truth endures to all generations.

(Psalms 100:4-5 NKJV)

7. Bitterness and Unforgiveness

And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. “ So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.” (Matthew 18:34-35 NKJV)

Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (1 Peter 3:7 NKJV)

8. Fear

Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, “ Where are you?” So he said, “ I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself. (Genesis 3:9-10 NKJV)

9. Outright Rebellion Against Gods Ways

If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear. (Psalms 66:18 NKJV)

10. Demands We Put on God

You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures. (James 4:2-3 NKJV)

11. Occultism and Counterfeit Spirituality In Our Lives

For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. (2 Corinthians 11:14 NKJV)

12. Unresolved Disappointment

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life. (Proverbs 13:12 NKJV)

 

 

 

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The Consequences of False-Burden Bearing

False burden bearing involves carrying a false responsibility in relationship to someone. It can often start off with a good intent and healthy motives, but can turn sour, where there is no longer an ability to release the cares and weight of the other person’s problem. The false burden bearer loses the ability to release the situation unto the Lord.

A false-burden bearer can begin wanting another person’s wholeness more than they do. Their lives can begin to revolve around a another’s sickness or dysfunction, where they find themselves constantly thinking about the problematic person. Meanwhile, the false-burden bearer begins to lose who they are and falls into deep trenches of burnout.

False-burden bearing can occur with a family member, a friend, someone in ministry. Any relationship can come under this trap if we don’t how to operate in healthy love.

The Woes of False Burden Bearing

In addition to the people-pleasing manifestations, false burden bearers add more tension to the mix, keeping people bound in unhealthy and ungodly practices.

Instead of properly helping others carry the burden you actually do all the carrying for them.
What you give out is followed up with a demand for more from you that never ends.
You end up wanting people’s freedom more than they do. This paves the way for classic false burden bearing. When this occurs for too long, you end up with codependency.
You lose sight of who God really wants you to help and focus on.
You become totally immersed in a guilt-ridden life.
You do things out of feeling sorry for someone, not true compassion.
Over time, you will become bitter over your “lot in life.”

Question: What makes false-burden bearing hard to break in life? 

Comments: The Consequences of False-Burden Bearing.

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#012: Is God Talking to Me? | Question from Female Being Wounded By Male Relationships [Podcast] Show Notes

Today’s episode is entitled “Is God Talking to Me?” where I talk about what God’s voice is NOT as well as identifying struggles people have in hearing God’s voice. I also address a female’s frustration with men hurting her in our Q&A Session.

Resource Recommendation – Olive Tree Bible Software

Olive Tree Software – www.olivetree.com

Fantastic FREE software for Mac, PC/Windows, IOS, iPhone, iPad, Android, Kindle Fire and Even Web Based

Software is free, but purchasing extra translations is a paid feature.

You can buy whatever you like to use. (Strong’s, Commentaries, Dictionaries)

Reading, notes and highlights syncs across all devices.

Q&A Session: Woman’s Frustration with Being Hurt By Men

My question is how do I get out of the pattern of being so hurt by men? Right now I can never  see myself ever trusting a man again; which makes me alone for the rest of my life; unless I just have friends and shut off my feelings so that I don’t get hurt again.  So many men are inappropriate and women too in this sex saturated world.  I am hoping your teachings will give me those answers . . . When men are so visual it makes it hard for me as a woman to feel like I am ever good enough. Still struggling. People have said I just choose the wrong men too  . . . I do not believe in love  anymore . . . I do not trust . . . I believe being single is better . . . I can let the past hurt go, but the memories don’t go away. I remember the past and what men have done to me . . . lying, cheating. . . forgiving others does not mean I will ever trust again. So How do I know if God is calling me to be single? Or is He trying to reach me through relationships? Yet they are toxic . . . it takes a wile to open my eyes and see.   But if I remain single then I  know I am running away and avoiding being in relationship so I do not get hurt again. = rejection issues.

Feature Presentation: Is God Talking to Me? 

In the last episode, I spoke on the four sources of thought . . . and one of them can be God. 

There is no question that God spoke to men all throughout recorded Scripture:

He spoke audibly
He spoke through people
He spoke through His Word
He spoke to the hearts of men by His Holy Spirit

The question is, “Do you believe that God speaks to you, today?”

John 10:27 – Jesus said, “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them.”

Book of Revelation, “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

We hear God’s voice from a dimension that is unseen, invisible, spiritual dimension . . .

This is the key of walking by the Spirit . . . hearing His voice and making God’s thoughts OUR thoughts. 

Common Observations on the Voice of God:

1. Drawing near to the voice of God is incredibly important. 

2. We live in a generation that struggles to hear the true voice of God. 

3. God is speaking. The problem is our ability to listen. 

4. Discerning God’s Voice is a Lifelong Journey.

5. I am often concerned when people act like they hear from God perfectly. 

6. Every human being on the planet can be subject to error. 

7. As we grow in learning God’s nature, we can become more familiar with His voice. 

God’s Voice is Not:

1.  Always the Loudest Voice.

2.  Always the Softest Voice. 

3.  Always the Gut Feeling. 

4.  Full of Confusion. 

5. Not Condemning.

6. Not full of tormenting fear. 

7. In violation with God’s Word. 

Question: Have you taken a moment to ask God to help improve your hearing? 

 

Comments: #012: Is God Talking to Me? | Question from Female Being Wounded By Male Relationships [Podcast] Show Notes.

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#012: Is God Talking to Me? | Question from Female Being Wounded By Male Relationships

Today’s episode is entitled “Is God Talking to Me?” where I talk about what God’s voice is NOT as well as identifying struggles people have in hearing God’s voice. I also address a female’s frustration with men hurting her in our Q&A Session.

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Software is free, but purchasing extra translations is a paid feature.

You can buy whatever you like to use. (Strong’s, Commentaries, Dictionaries)

Reading, notes and highlights syncs across all devices.

Q&A Session: Woman’s Frustration with Being Hurt By Men

My question is how do I get out of the pattern of being so hurt by men? Right now I can never  see myself ever trusting a man again; which makes me alone for the rest of my life; unless I just have friends and shut off my feelings so that I don’t get hurt again.  So many men are inappropriate and women too in this sex saturated world.  I am hoping your teachings will give me those answers . . . When men are so visual it makes it hard for me as a woman to feel like I am ever good enough. Still struggling. People have said I just choose the wrong men too  . . . I do not believe in love  anymore . . . I do not trust . . . I believe being single is better . . . I can let the past hurt go, but the memories don’t go away. I remember the past and what men have done to me . . . lying, cheating. . . forgiving others does not mean I will ever trust again. So How do I know if God is calling me to be single? Or is He trying to reach me through relationships? Yet they are toxic . . . it takes a wile to open my eyes and see.   But if I remain single then I  know I am running away and avoiding being in relationship so I do not get hurt again. = rejection issues.

Feature Presentation: Is God Talking to Me? 

In the last episode, I spoke on the four sources of thought . . . and one of them can be God. 

There is no question that God spoke to men all throughout recorded Scripture:

He spoke audibly
He spoke through people
He spoke through His Word
He spoke to the hearts of men by His Holy Spirit

The question is, “Do you believe that God speaks to you, today?”

John 10:27 – Jesus said, “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them.”

Book of Revelation, “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

We hear God’s voice from a dimension that is unseen, invisible, spiritual dimension . . .

This is the key of walking by the Spirit . . . hearing His voice and making God’s thoughts OUR thoughts. 

Common Observations on the Voice of God:

1. Drawing near to the voice of God is incredibly important. 

2. We live in a generation that struggles to hear the true voice of God. 

3. God is speaking. The problem is our ability to listen. 

4. Discerning God’s Voice is a Lifelong Journey.

5. I am often concerned when people act like they hear from God perfectly. 

6. Every human being on the planet can be subject to error. 

7. As we grow in learning God’s nature, we can become more familiar with His voice. 

God’s Voice is Not:

1.  Always the Loudest Voice.

2.  Always the Softest Voice. 

3.  Always the Gut Feeling. 

4.  Full of Confusion. 

5. Not Condemning.

6. Not full of tormenting fear. 

7. In violation with God’s Word. 

Question: Have you taken a moment to ask God to help improve your hearing? 

 

Comments: #012: Is God Talking to Me? | Question from Female Being Wounded By Male Relationships.

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